人生拼图-中英

现代金融的目的，就是阻止普通人完成原始积累 消费主义负责洗脑，金融工具负责收割。投资本质上是认知的变现，要想投资做得好，必须有高于常人的认知，能想到常人想不到、做到常人做不到。 要胜于这些人，必须要获得高于常人的差异化的认知，高认知的投资是变现，低认知的投资是奉献。 差异化的认知在于别人恐惧的时候你贪婪，别人贪婪的时候你恐惧；差异化的认知在于能提前洞悉行业演进的趋势；差异化的认知在于能精准识别有深护城河的伟大公司；差异化的认知在于能够避开那些应该避开的大部分公司；差异化的认知在于真正做到做时间的朋友长期陪伴。 上个礼拜在香港和一个在投行工作了十多年的朋友聊天，他跟我说：“很多人认为金融可以让人致富，但是在系统底层逻辑中，现代金融最大的作用就是精准地筛选出想要通过勤奋来实现原始积累的普通人，并且收割掉他们。” 这句话听起来比较刺耳。但是你若观察一下身边的情况，就会发现一个怪异的现象：这一代年轻人受教育程度最高、工作最努力，但是要完成“第一桶金”的积累，却比上一代人难得多。 为什么？因为现在金融生态，到处都是为你量身打造的“积累粉碎机”。 一、消费主义：提前透支你的劳动剩余 原始积累的本质是什么？是劳动剩余的固定。 简单来说，就是赚10块钱，只花3块钱，剩下的7块钱就变成了资产，这就是积累。但是现代金融体系的第一道防线就是用各种方法使你存不了钱。 现在的支付方式越来越隐形了，你发现了没有？信用卡、花呗、分期付款等等金融产品其实是让你模糊了对于“钱”的感觉。当你刷脸或者按一下指纹的时候，你付出的是辛苦工作的汗水还是一个数字呢？ 金融机构用这种方式把你的劳动成果还没来得及享受就被提前收割了。 当你为了最新款的手机、名牌包选择用分期的方式购买它们的时候，就等于把原本属于自己的“原始积累”送到了银行以及厂家的资产负债表中去了。 金融体系用精密的算法告诉你“你值得过上更好的生活”，其实它背后的意思是“你不配拥有存款”。 二、通胀与资产泡沫：无声的储蓄清洗 如果你自律，避开消费主义的诱惑，努力攒钱的话，那么第二道关口就等着你了，那就是购买力的无声稀释。 从宏观金融的角度来讲，适度的通货膨胀是常态。但是对于处于最初积累阶段的人而言，通货膨胀就是最残忍的利息。你辛苦积攒的50万，在三五年一次资产价格波动之后，购买力就会减少三分之一。 优质的资产（比如说核心地段的房子、顶级企业的股份）涨得比工资要快。 金融杠杆被富人用来买资产，普通人则被排斥在外。等你攒够了十年前的买房首付款，房价已经涨了三倍。 追赶效应使得90%的人陷入了西西弗斯式的困境：你一直努力不断地把石头推上山，但是金融系统只要稍微转动一下货币阀门，你的石头就会滚回原点。 三、复杂金融产品：专门收割“懂点行”的人 如果说消费主义收割的是小白，那么复杂的金融产品收割的就是想通过理财实现阶层跨越的中产。 这几年来我们见过很多名词：P2P、非标资产、各种挂钩衍生品、甚至是以AI、区块链为名的理财方案。 这些产品最初的设计目的，并不是为了帮助你盈利，而是为了获得你的管理费以及本金。 现代金融非常推崇“波动”，因为有波动才会有交易，有交易才会有手续费。 对于想要完成原始积累的人来说，最稳妥的方法一般都是最无趣的。 但是金融系统会不断地制造焦虑，诱导你去频繁地操作、去追涨杀跌、去相信那些连专家都无法解释清楚的算法。 最终，当大部分人才刚开始踏上“通向财务自由”的道路时，就变成了金融机构利润表上的一行数字。 四、如何打破这个隐形围栏？ 看清了事实之后，并不是要我们愤世嫉俗，而是为了让我们在博弈中为自己留下一线生机。 想要实现原始积累，就必须拥有下面这三种“反直觉”的能力： 1、极高的自律性与延迟满足：当金融体系疯狂地诱导你消费的时候，你要像守财奴一样守住自己的本金。 原始积累时期节省下来的钱就是你以后的士兵。没有这个最初的规模效应的话，任何理财技巧都是空中楼阁。 2、远离看不太懂的高收益：所有的金融创新，第一受益人永远都是设计者。普通人积累最多的方式，就是“深耕场内（职业技能）+场外被动长拿（定投指数或者核心资产）”。 3、建立“资产”而不是“负债”的思维：每花出去一笔钱的时候，都要问自己，这笔钱是让我以后更有钱，还是让我以后必须更加努力地工作来偿还？ 现代金融是一场巨大的“智力与欲望”的筛选。它奖励的是能够忍耐延迟满足、看透规则的人，而惩罚的是随波逐流、被欲望所裹挟的人。 原始积累的过程是枯燥的，甚至是非常痛苦的，在繁华的都市里要坚守住内心，做一个苦行僧。 只有当你完成了最初的积累之后，你才有资格与这个系统抗衡，甚至利用这个系统。 不要在终点线还没有到达之前就已经消耗完你所有的体力。每天坚持和大家分享好文章希望点个关注点个赞 谢谢
The purpose of modern finance is to prevent ordinary people from completing original accumulation. Consumerism is responsible for brainwashing, and financial tools are responsible for harvesting. The essence of investment is the realization of cognition. To do well in investing, one must have cognition higher than the average person, able to think of things others cannot think of and achieve things others cannot achieve. To surpass these people, one must obtain differentiated cognition higher than the average person. High-cognition investment is realization, while low-cognition investment is dedication. Differentiated cognition lies in being greedy when others are fearful, and fearful when others are greedy; differentiated cognition lies in being able to foresee the trends of industry evolution in advance; differentiated cognition lies in being able to accurately identify great companies with deep moats; differentiated cognition lies in being able to avoid most companies that should be avoided; differentiated cognition lies in truly being friends with time and accompanying it long-term. Last week, I chatted with a friend who had worked in an investment bank for over ten years in Hong Kong. He told me, “Many people believe that finance can make people rich, but in the underlying logic of the system, the greatest role of modern finance is to accurately screen out ordinary people who want to achieve original accumulation through hard work and harvest them.” This statement sounds rather harsh. But if you observe the situation around you, you will find a strange phenomenon: this generation of young people are the most educated and work the hardest, but it is much harder for them to accumulate their “first pot of gold” compared to previous generations. Why? Because the current financial ecosystem is full of “accumulation 粉碎机” tailored for you. I. Consumerism: Prematurely consuming your labor surplus What is the essence of original accumulation? It is the fixation of labor surplus. Simply put, it means earning 10 yuan and spending only 3 yuan, with the remaining 7 yuan becoming assets, which is accumulation. However, the first line of defense of the modern financial system is to use various methods to prevent you from saving money. Have you noticed how payment methods are becoming more invisible these days? Credit cards, Huabei, installment payments, and other financial products actually make you blur the feeling of “money.” When you use facial recognition or press a fingerprint, are you paying the sweat of hard work or just a number? Financial institutions use this method to harvest your labor 成果 before you have a chance to enjoy them. When you choose to buy the latest smartphone or luxury bag through installment payments, you are essentially sending your “original accumulation” to the balance sheets of banks and manufacturers. The financial system uses precise algorithms to tell you “you deserve a better life,” but what it really means is “you don’t deserve savings.” II. Inflation and asset bubbles: Silent savings cleansing If you are disciplined and avoid the temptation of consumerism, work hard to save money, then the second checkpoint awaits you: the silent dilution of purchasing power. From a macro-financial perspective, moderate inflation is normal. But for those in the initial accumulation stage, inflation is the cruelest interest. The 500,000 you painstakingly saved will see its purchasing power reduced by one-third after a few years of asset price fluctuations. High-quality assets (such as houses in prime locations or shares of top-tier companies) appreciate faster than wages. Financial leverage is used by the rich to buy assets, while ordinary people are excluded. By the time you’ve saved enough for a down payment on a house from ten years ago, the price of the house has already tripled. The catch-up effect traps 90% of people in a Sisyphean dilemma: you keep working hard to push the stone up the mountain, but the financial system can slightly turn the monetary valve, and your stone will roll back to the starting point. III. Complex financial products: Designed to harvest those who “know a bit” If consumerism harvests the novices, then complex financial products harvest the middle class who want to achieve social mobility through wealth management. In recent years, we have seen many terms: P2P, non-standard assets, various derivative products linked to them, and even financial plans named after AI and blockchain. The original design purpose of these products was not to help you make profits, but to earn management fees and principal from you. Modern finance highly values “volatility” because only with volatility can there be transactions, and only with transactions can there be transaction fees. For those who want to achieve initial accumulation, the safest method is usually the most boring one. However, the financial system constantly creates anxiety,诱导 ing you to operate frequently, chase the ups and downs, and believe in algorithms that even experts cannot explain clearly. In the end, when most people have just started on the “path to financial freedom,” they become just a line of numbers on the profit and loss statement of financial institutions. Four, how to break this invisible fence? After seeing the truth, it is not to make us cynical, but to leave us a sliver of hope in the game. To achieve initial accumulation, one must possess the following three “counter-intuitive” abilities: 1. High self-discipline and delayed gratification: When the financial system 疯狂地诱导 you to consume, you must hold onto your principal like a miser. The money saved during the initial accumulation period is your future army. Without this initial scale effect, any financial skill is just a castle in the air. 2. Stay away from high returns that you don’t understand: The first beneficiaries of all financial innovations are always the designers. The most common way for ordinary people to accumulate wealth is “deep cultivation within the field (professional skills) + passive long-term holding outside the field (index investment or core assets).” 3. Develop a mindset of “assets” rather than “liabilities”: Every time you spend money, ask yourself, is this money making me richer in the future, or will it make me have to work harder to repay it in the future? Modern finance is a huge “intelligence and desire” selection. It rewards those who can endure delayed gratification and see through the rules, while punishing those who go with the flow and are carried away by desire. The process of initial accumulation is tedious, even very painful. In the bustling city, you must hold fast to your inner self, like a ascetic. Only when you have completed the initial accumulation do you have the right to compete with this system, even to use this system. Do not exhaust all your strength before you even reach the finish line. I persistently share good articles with everyone every day, hope you can follow and like, thank you.

原来欧洲对成年人的定义是30岁 跟朋友出去玩，买票的时候才忽然发现， 在这里，29岁及以下被称为青年， 30岁之后，才正式进入“成年人”的序列。 那一刻我突然意识到， 原来我还很年轻。 而年轻于我而言，并不是一个固定的数字， 而是一种正在流动的状态。 在医院工作时，老板们常说就业环境越来越紧， 30岁以后再找工作，就需要拿出更锋利的潜力， 一个萝卜一个坑，位置有限。 我在心里算了一下， 26岁。 仿佛一只无形的沙漏被倒转， 好像我的职业生涯，只剩下四年的倒计时。 可是在另一张餐桌上， 我和一群来自不同国家的朋友聊天。 他们大多三十出头， 却像刚刚开始生活。 有人工作几年后，拿着全额奖学金， 去了英国一个安静的小城重新读书； 有人在某个清晨醒来， 给老板打了通电话，说要去创业； 还有人推翻了原本稳定的轨道， 从市场营销转身，走进兽医学院。 每一次他们听到我的年龄， 都会笑着说： Du bist noch so jung, warum also nicht? 而在另一端的时间里， 春节回家，亲戚们坐在饭桌旁， 用另一套时钟丈量人生。 26岁，早该结婚生子， 有人孩子已经会叫人， 有人开始操持一日三餐、柴米油盐。 只有我， 仍然像个尚未被归类的孩子， 在不同的城市之间来回行走。 后来我才慢慢明白， 也许30岁，才是真正意义上的“成年”。 那不是迟到， 而是终于完成了学习、迷茫与寻找， 第一次在精神与经济上站稳脚跟。 所谓黄金期， 不过是新手期的另一种说法。 至于40岁、50岁， 或许只是解锁更多隐藏剧情的时刻。 原来我仍是青年。 原来，我甚至还没有成年。
It turns out that in Europe, the definition of adulthood is 30 years old. While hanging out with friends and buying tickets, I suddenly realized that here, those 29 and under are considered young, and only after turning 30 do you officially enter the “adult” sequence. At that moment, I suddenly realized that I’m still very young. And for me, youth isn’t a fixed number, but rather a flowing state. While working in the hospital, the bosses often say that the job market is getting tighter and tighter, and after 30, you need to tap into sharper potential. It’s like one 萝卜一个坑, with limited positions. I calculated it in my heart, 26. It felt like an invisible sandglass was being reversed, as if my career only had a countdown of four years left. But at another table, I was chatting with a group of friends from different countries. Most of them were in their early 30s, yet they seemed like they had just started their lives. Some went to a quiet small town in the UK after working for a few years, studying with full scholarships; some woke up one morning and called their boss, saying they wanted to start a business; others overturned their stable tracks, switching from marketing to veterinary medicine. Every time they heard my age, they would smile and say: Du bist noch so jung, warum also nicht? On the other side of time, during the Spring Festival, relatives sat at the dinner table, measuring life with a different clock. At 26, I should have been married and had children. Some already had children who could call them, while others started managing daily meals and household chores. Only me, still like a child who hasn’t been categorized, traveling between different cities. Later, I gradually realized that maybe 30 is the true definition of “adulthood.” It’s not a delay, but finally completing the learning, confusion, and searching, and for the first time, standing firm both spiritually and financially. The so-called golden period is just another way of saying the beginner’s phase. As for 40, 50, or even older, perhaps they are just moments of unlocking more hidden storylines. It turns out I’m still young. It turns out, I haven’t even become an adult yet.

人性！有心眼和有脑子是两回事！1、当一群人孤立一个人时要知道，其实是这群人有问题。 2、越调皮的孩子越聪明。 3、满口仁义道德的人一般都自私。 4、强大的人不会说悲惨经历。 5、嘴甜、自来熟的人一般不值得信任。 6、经常诉苦的人一定是废物。 7、情绪稳定的人格局都很大。 8、当你要与知道你底牌的人翻脸时你必须先拿到他的底牌。 9、你越信任的人伤你越深。 谋略： 1、倾诉是没有用的，所以要慢慢学会闭嘴 2、不要急于报仇，烂掉的水果会自己从树上掉下来。 3、能控制住自己嘴巴的人都很厉害，不管是吃饭还是说话。 4、不要因为一时投缘，就轻易亮出你的底牌 5、带着答案问你问题的人，他要的不是答案，而是你的把柄。 6、挑你毛病的人，只是想立威，并不是你真的有毛病。 格局： 1、要懂得扮猪吃老虎，平时不要显摆自己的聪明 2、暗中布局，谋事先谋人，人通了事就好做了，一出手就是定局。 3、要学会伪装自己的情绪，天塌下来，也要保持淡定。 4、学会识人，夸人，用人，让天下英才为你所用切忌太过自我。 5、时机未到，该当孙子就当孙子，时机成熟，出手狠，斩草除根。 驭人： 1、有心眼和有脑子是两回事，不要像跳梁小丑一样取悦任何人。 2、如果想知道这个人是小人还是君子你先把自己牺牲两次，看看他是怎样对待你的牺牲，就能看清他是小人还是君子。 3、你要想知道这个人值不值得你去交往记住：你先去冷落他。 4、对老人要吹捧，人老了，退休了，就只剩下那点回忆了，多捧着他，他就能为你所用。 圆滑： 1、想要跟身边的人搞好关系，就永远不要跟他分享成功的喜悦和开心的事。人性中最大的恶，就是见不得别人比自己好。 2、明处要忍，暗处要狠。只有人欣赏你的成功，没有人会计较你的手段，低头看勇气，抬头看实力。 3、对于刚认识的人不要太热情，强者从不跟任何人走的太近，只有弱者才喜欢滥交朋友。 4、放下助人情节，尊重他人命运，不要干预别人因果。 心计： 1、别人不开口请你帮忙，尽量不要主动帮忙。 2、人际交往的高段位技巧：热情，大方，一问三不知。 3、做人不能太老实，再好的朋友也有可能出卖你。 4、你真正要做的事，连神明都不要讲，安静地做，成功了再说。 5、不要告诉别人你的计划，直接让他们看结果。 有好运得人一定会刷到，点赞 关注 收藏留下一句“越来越好”三个月见分晓#孔晓博 #电商创业 #人性
Human nature! Having ulterior motives and having a brain are two different things! 1. When a group of people isolate one person, know that it’s actually the group that has the problem. 2. The more mischievous a child is, the smarter they are. 3. People who talk a lot about benevolence and morality are usually selfish. 4. Strong people don’t talk about their miserable experiences. 5. People who are sweet-tongued and familiar with everyone are generally not trustworthy. 6. People who often complain are definitely waste. 7. Emotionally stable people have a big perspective. 8. When you need to confront someone who knows your cards, you must get their cards first. 9. The more you trust someone, the deeper the hurt they will cause you. Strategy: 1. Confiding is useless, so you should slowly learn to keep quiet. 2. Don’t be 急于 revenge, rotten fruit will fall off the tree by itself. 3. People who can control their mouths are very powerful, whether eating or speaking. 4. Don’t show your cards easily just because you feel a connection. 5. People who ask you questions with answers in mind don’t want the answer, but your leverage. 6. People who pick on your flaws are just trying to establish authority, not because you really have flaws. Perspective: 1. Learn to play the fool to eat the tiger, don’t show off your intelligence in daily life. 2. Make 暗中布局,谋事先谋人, once people are on your side, things become easier, and one move is enough to decide the outcome. 3. Learn to fake your emotions, even if the sky is falling, stay calm. 4. Learn to recognize people, praise them, and use them, so that talents under the sky can be used for you, avoid being too self-centered. 5. When the time isn’t right, be a good boy, and when the time is right, act decisively, cut off the grass and remove the roots. Ruling people: 1. Having ulterior motives and having a brain are two different things, don’t entertain anyone like a street acrobat. 2. If you want to know if this person is a petty person or a noble person, sacrifice yourself twice and see how they treat your sacrifices to see if they are petty or noble. 3. If you want to know if this person is worth associating with, remember: you should first ignore them. 4. Flatter the elderly, when people get old and retire, they only have those memories left, flatter them more, and they can be used for you. Smooth: 1. If you want to get along with the people around you, never share your joys and successes with them. The greatest evil in human nature is not being able to stand seeing others better than you. 2. Be patient in the open and fierce in the hidden. Only people will appreciate your success, no one will calculate your means, look down to find courage, look up to find strength. 3. Don’t be too enthusiastic with people you just met, the strong never get too close to anyone, only the weak like to make friends indiscriminately. 4. Let go of the idea of helping others, respect others’ fate, don’t interfere with their cause and effect. Mind games: 1. If others don’t ask for your help, try not to offer it voluntarily. 2. The high-level skills of interpersonal communication: enthusiasm, magnanimity, asking three questions and knowing nothing. 3. Don’t be too honest, even the best friends can betray you. 4. What you really need to do, even the gods shouldn’t know, do it quietly, and talk about success after it happens. 5. Don’t tell others your plans, just let them see the results. People with good luck will definitely encounter it, like, follow, collect, leave a comment “getting better and better”, see the results in three months. #Kong Xiaobo #E-commerce Entrepreneurship #Human Nature

人性的 27个高城府表现!1.柔性拒绝:不直接说“不”，用拖延消耗对方期待，等事情过了黄金期，让其主动放弃，既保全面子，又避免正面冲突。 2.合作前置:先小人后君子，把最坏结果、权责边界写进合同，丑话说尽，后续合作才能少纠纷、走得稳。 3.求人巧技:不卑微说“帮个忙”，而是转化为”有个展示才华的机会，要不要试”，满足对方价值感，成功率更高。 4.反质问破局:面对质问不急于解释，用反问把自证”的皮球踢回去，让对方陷入逻辑闭环，掌握主动权。 5.新圈蛰伏:初入团队不急于露锋芒，刻意”装笨,降低他人警惕，暗中观察每个人的立场、能力与底牌。 6.人心绑定:想让人死心塌地追随，钱是基础，更要赋予其稀缺的身份与尊严，满足精神需求远比物质捆绑更牢固。 7.反制流言:遭遇背后议论，公开场合微笑回应”听说你很关心我，辛苦了”，既彰显格局，又暗戳戳施压，让对方自讨没趣。 8.怒而不发:真正厉害的人从不动怒，把羞辱与冒犯当作”能量储备”，在关键节点集中爆发，一击制敌。 9.识人关键:判断能否深交，别盯TA对你好的时候，要看你犯错后，TA是第一时间指责，还是主动帮你弥补。 10.圈层破局:融入一个圈子不用讨好所有人，搞定核心话语权者，让其为你背书，比盲目经营人脉高效百倍。 11.观谎识心:不立刻拆穿谎言，放任对方继续编造，谎言的复杂程度，就是其城府深浅的直接体现， 12.处世铁律:功劳让给上级，利益分给下属，委屈留给自己，平衡各方诉求，才能在任何环境中立于不败之地。 13.价值重构:别做”有用的工具人”(易被替代)，要做”有不可替代性的价值者”，手握定价权，才不会被轻易拿捏。 14.婉拒技巧:不想帮忙就给一套复杂且难落地的方案，既显得你用心思考，又能让对方知难而退不伤情面。 15.实力避险:刻意和群体中最有实力的人保持距离，既不依附站队，也不刻意对立，避免卷入不必要的权力漩涡。 16.高级赞美:不空洞夸对方的优点，而是肯定其背后付出的努力，这种认可更显真诚，也更能打动人心。 17.捧杀破局:毀掉一个人不用硬碰硬，把 TA捧到德不配位的高度，利用超出能力的压力，让其自行崩溃。 18.留白艺术:说话留半分、做事留余地，不把底牌全亮，才能让人始终对你保持好奇与敬畏。 19.本质认知:世上没有“对事不对人”，所有事的核心都是人与人的利益博弈，看清关系本质才能少走弯路。 20.人性洞察:朋友圈是精心打造的人设，购物车才藏着一个人最真实的欲望与需求。 21.意图拆解:判断他人真实想法，别听TA说什么，重点分析谁能从这番话里获得最大利益，答案自现。 22.后路思维:任何时候都要留好退路，备选方案越多，前进时越有底气，也能应对突发风险， 23.人情经营:学会适度麻烦别人，一来一往的人情互动，才是关系升温的催化剂，从不麻烦他人，也难获他人相助。 24.谋制最高明智谋是谋，把规则、利益摆在明面上，即便对方识破，也因趋利避害而不得不同。 25.止损智慧:不与烂人烂事纠缠，你的沉默和无视，就是对其最狠的报复，也是节省精力的最优解。 26.背叛应对:不必原谅背叛者，把TA当成人生警示案例，时刻提醒自己规避同类风险，比纠结对错更有价值。 27.处世境界:外圆内方，待人接物圆融通透，不失善意，内心却始终坚守原则与底线，不随波逐流。 留下金句“我要变好”你会顺风顺水，财运亨通三个月内，见分晓。#小錦 #为人处世 #城府 #情商
27 High-Level Calculated Behaviors of Human Nature! 1. Flexible Refusal: Not saying “no” directly, but using delays to consume the other party’s expectations, waiting for the golden period to pass, and letting them give up voluntarily, thus preserving face and avoiding direct conflict. 2. Preemptive Cooperation: Starting with the worst-case scenario and boundaries of responsibility in contracts, saying all the ugly things upfront, so that future cooperation can be less prone to disputes and smoother. 3. Skillful Requesting: Not humbly asking for a favor, but framing it as “an opportunity to showcase your talent, would you like to try?” to satisfy the other party’s sense of value, increasing the success rate. 4. Breaking the Impasse with Counter-questions: Facing accusations, don’t 急于解释, but use counter-questions to pass the self-justification “ball” back, making the other party 陷入 a logical loop and gaining the initiative. 5. New Circle Camouflage: When joining a team, don’t 急于 show off your abilities; deliberately “act dumb” to lower others’警惕, and secretly observe everyone’s stance, abilities, and bottom cards. 6. Binding Hearts and Minds: To make someone loyal and devoted, money is the foundation, but 赋予 them scarce status and dignity is equally important, as meeting spiritual needs is far more 牢固 than material bindings. 7. Countering Rumors: When encountering gossip, respond with a smile in public, “I heard you care about me, thank you for your concern,” which not only demonstrates your 格局 but also subtly pressures the other party, making them feel awkward. 8. Anger Under Control: Truly formidable people never get angry; they treat humiliation and offense as “energy reserves,” releasing a concentrated burst at critical moments to defeat the opponent with one strike. 9. Key to Judging People: To determine if you can trust someone deeply, don’t focus on when they are nice to you, but on how they react when you make a mistake—whether they blame you immediately or actively help you fix it. 10. Breaking Through Circles: Integrating into a circle doesn’t require pleasing everyone; securing the support of core influencers is far more efficient than blindly cultivating relationships. 11. Spotting Lies: Don’t immediately expose lies; let the other party continue fabricating, as the complexity of their lies directly reflects the depth of their calculation. 12. Iron Rule of Dealing with People: Let the achievements be credited to superiors, benefits shared with subordinates, and grievances borne by yourself, balancing all parties’ needs to stay unshakable in any environment. 13. Reconstructing Value: Don’t be a “useful tool” (easily replaceable); be someone with “irreplaceable value,” holding the power to set prices, so you won’t be easily manipulated. 14. Artful Refusal: If you don’t want to help, offer a complex and impractical solution, which seems like careful thought while making the other party 知难而退 without hurting feelings. 15. Strategic Distance: Deliberately keep a distance from the most powerful person in a group, neither aligning nor opposing, to avoid unnecessary power struggles. 16. Sophisticated Compliments: Don’t give empty praise for others’ strengths; instead, acknowledge the effort behind their achievements, which appears more sincere and touches the heart more deeply. 17. Overpraising to Break the Cycle: To bring someone down, don’t confront them head-on; instead, praise them to an undeserved height, using the pressure of exceeding their capabilities to make them collapse on their own. 18. The Art of Leaving Room: Leave half a point in speech and room in actions, not revealing all your cards, so people will always remain curious and respectful. 19. Understanding the Essence: There is no “dealing with the matter, not the person”; the core of everything is the interest 博弈 between people. Seeing the essence of relationships can help you avoid detours. 20. Human Nature Insight: Friends circles are carefully crafted personas, while shopping carts reveal a person’s most authentic desires and needs. 21. Deconstructing Intentions: To understand others’ true thoughts, don’t focus on what they say, but analyze who benefits the most from their words—the answer will become clear. 22. Planning for Retreat: Always leave an 退路, the more backup plans you have, the more confident you’ll be moving forward, and the better you can handle unexpected risks. 23. Cultivating Relationships: Learn to bother others moderately; the back-and-forth of human interactions is the catalyst for strengthening relationships. Never bothering others also makes it hard to receive help in return. 24. The highest wisdom in strategy is strategy itself; by keeping rules and interests clear, even if the opponent sees through it, they cannot help but comply due to the pursuit of profit and avoidance of harm. 25. The wisdom of cutting losses: Don’t get entangled with bad people and bad situations; your silence and indifference are the harshest form of revenge, and also the best solution to conserve energy. 26. Handling betrayal: No need to forgive the betrayer; treat them as a cautionary example in life, constantly reminding yourself to avoid similar risks, which is more valuable than dwelling on right or wrong. 27. The realm of social conduct: Outwardly flexible, inwardly firm; handle interactions with grace and clarity, never losing kindness, while always upholding principles and boundaries, never going with the flow. Leave the golden phrase “I want to improve,” and you will have smooth sailing and prosperous wealth; see the results within three months.#LittleBrocade #SocialSkills #Cunning #EmotionalIntelligence

一、基本情况 自2026年1月相识以来，双方逐步建立深厚情感基础，并于2026年2月正式确立恋爱关系。2026年2月6日在南京成功会晤，标志着双方关系进入新发展阶段。本阶段，我们坚持“相互理解、共同进步”的基本原则，推动关系健康、稳定、可持续发展。 二、主要成效 （一）情感基础持续巩固 双方始终秉持“双向奔赴”核心原则，感情稳定性与幸福感同步提升。日常沟通顺畅高效，矛盾调解机制初步建立，未发生重大情感纠纷，幸福指数保持高位运行。 （二） 思想共识显著增强 确立“一个原则、六个坚持”关系准则： •一个原则：坚定不移贯彻双向奔赴原则 •六个坚持：坚持女朋友的领导核心地位、坚持女朋友主体地位、坚持互体互谅、坚持依法恋爱、坚持从恋爱实际出发、坚持爱德结合 创新推行“四不两直”沟通规范：不套路、不矫情、不吊着、不脚踏两只船，直接说内心话、直接表达喜欢。 严格执行“三要三拒”行为准则：要真诚、要付出、要互相尊重；拒空谈、拒双标、拒过度理想化。 （三）共处质量稳步提升 高效统筹工作与恋爱时间，实现见面频次与质量双提升。成功开展美食探索、电影欣赏、公园散步等多元化约会项目，有效规避模式单一导致的倦怠风险。 （四）情绪管理机制初步建立 针对恋爱过程中可能出现的情绪波动，已构建“预警-沟通-化解”三级响应机制，通过及时沟通、换位思考、正向引导等策略，成功实现矛盾萌芽阶段精准干预。 三、存在问题与改进方向（一）恋爱活动多样性有待增强 需进一步拓展文艺类、知识类、体验类互动项目，在共处中实现感情深度发展与质量提升。 （二）长效规划机制尚不完善 需提前部署重大事项沟通协商流程，明确双方责任分工，确保在面对未来机遇与挑战时能高效协同应对。 （三）日常沟通质量需持续优化 应警惕重复性生活模式对情感活力的影响，在恋爱初期重点提升沟通效能，减少无效交流，强化对彼此优秀品行的发现与肯定机制。 四、下一步发展计划 （一）实施“恋爱质量提升工程” 1.每月共同参与1-2项文艺体验活动（观展、音乐会、手工制作等） 2.建立“共同成长基金”，专项用于技能学习与体验 拓展 3. 推行“惊喜轮值制度”，每月由一方策划特色约会项目 （二）完善“关系治理体系” 1.建立季度关系评估会议机制，对照“情感发展指标体系”进行复盘 2. 制定《重大事项协商议事规则》，明确决策流程与 责任分工 3.编制《恋爱应急预案手册》，涵盖矛盾调解、危机处理等场景 （三） 深化“洶通效能革命” 1.开展“非暴力沟通”专题学习与实践打卡 2.设立“每日肯定时刻”，常态化实施正向反馈 3.建立“沟通问题台账”，实行清单式管理、限期销号整改 （四）构建“可持续发展生态”
I. Basic Situation Since meeting in January 2026, both parties have gradually established a strong emotional foundation and officially established a romantic relationship in February 2026. On February 6, 2026, a successful meeting was held in Nanjing, marking the entry of both parties’ relationship into a new development stage. In this stage, we adhere to the basic principle of “mutual understanding and common progress,” promoting the healthy, stable, and sustainable development of the relationship. II. Main Achievements (1) Emotional Foundation Continuously Strengthened Both parties have always upheld the core principle of “mutual pursuit,” with the stability and happiness of the relationship improving simultaneously. Daily communication is smooth and efficient, a conflict resolution mechanism has been preliminarily established, no major emotional disputes have occurred, and the happiness index remains at a high level. (2) Significant Enhancement of Ideological Consensus A relationship guideline of “one principle, six commitments” was established: • One principle: Unwaveringly implement the principle of mutual pursuit • Six commitments: Adhere to the leading role of the girlfriend, adhere to the 主体 status of the girlfriend, adhere to mutual understanding, adhere to legal romance, adhere to starting from the actual situation of romance, and adhere to the combination of love and virtue. An innovative communication norm of “four noes, two direct” was introduced: no clichés, no pretense, no holding back, no playing both sides, speak directly from the heart, and directly express affection. Strictly implement the “three musts, three rejects” behavior code: be sincere, be generous, and respect each other; reject empty talk, reject double standards, and reject excessive idealization. (3) Steady Improvement in Quality of Coexistence Efficiently coordinate work and romance time, achieving a dual improvement in meeting frequency and quality. Successfully carried out diversified dating projects such as food exploration, movie appreciation, and park walks, effectively avoiding the risk of fatigue caused by a single model. (4) Preliminary Establishment of Emotion Management Mechanism To address potential emotional fluctuations during the romance, a three-level response mechanism of “early warning - communication - resolution” has been constructed. Through timely communication, perspective-taking, and positive guidance, precise intervention at the early stage of conflict has been successfully achieved. III. Existing Problems and Improvement Directions (1) Diversity of Dating Activities Needs Enhancement Further expand interactive projects in the fields of arts, knowledge, and experience to achieve deep emotional development and quality improvement during cohabitation. (2) Long-term Planning Mechanism is Imperfect Need to deploy communication and negotiation processes for major issues in advance, clarify the division of responsibilities between both parties, and ensure efficient coordination in the face of future opportunities and challenges. (3) Daily Communication Quality Needs Continuous Optimization Be alert to the impact of repetitive daily life patterns on emotional vitality. Focus on improving communication efficiency in the early stages of romance, reduce ineffective communication, and strengthen the mechanism for discovering and affirming each other’s excellent qualities. IV. Next Steps Development Plan (1) Implement the “Romance Quality Improvement Project” 1. Participate in 1-2 cultural experience activities together every month (exhibitions, concerts, handmade crafts, etc.) 2. Establish a “Joint Growth Fund,” specifically for skill learning and experiences Expansion 3. Implement the “Surprise Rotation System,” with one party planning a special dating project each month (2) Improve the “Relationship Governance System” 1. Establish a quarterly relationship evaluation meeting mechanism, reviewing against the “Emotional Development Indicator System” 2. Develop the “Major Issues Consultation and Decision-Making Rules,” clarifying the decision-making process and responsibility division 3. Compile the “Romance Emergency Response Manual,” covering conflict resolution and crisis management scenarios (3) Deepen the “Xingtong Efficiency Revolution” 1. Conduct “Nonviolent Communication” thematic learning and practice check-ins 2. Set up “Daily Affirmation Moments,” implementing positive feedback regularly 3. Establish a “Communication Issue Ledger,” implementing list-based management and deadline-driven corrective actions (4) Build a “Sustainable Development Ecosystem”

1. 坚持开展批评与自我批评民主生活会
   Continuously conduct criticism and self-criticism democratic life meetings
2. 积极探索“十五五”恋爱规划落实路径 3.健全常态长效机制，压实双方主体责任，坚决防止 问题反复 五、结语 回顾过往，我们已奠定坚实情感基础；展望未来，我们将继续秉持“稳中求进、久久为功”的发展方针。 坚持以党的可持续发展理念为指导，以制度化建设为保障，以双向成长为动力，共同建设健康稳定、充满活力的现代情侣关系，为新时代情感文明建设贡献实践样本。#情侣见面的正确方式
   Actively explore the implementation paths of the “Fifteenth Five-Year” love plan 3. Improve the sound and long-term mechanisms, clarify the responsibilities of both parties, and resolutely prevent problems from recurring. V. Conclusion Looking back, we have laid a solid emotional foundation; looking forward, we will continue to uphold the development principle of “stability seeking progress and achieving success through perseverance.” Guided by the Party’s sustainable development concept, guaranteed by institutional construction, and driven by mutual growth, we will jointly build a healthy, stable, and vibrant modern couple relationship, contributing a practical sample to the construction of emotional civilization in the new era. #The right way for couples to meet

中国的资产阶级为什么只会欺压本国人民？ 2026-02-08 阅读需要11分钟 你以为中国的资产阶级萌芽是被封建皇权扼杀的吗？ 错。 大错特错！ 这分明是一场持续了千年的资本对皇权和百姓的双重绞杀。
Why does China’s bourgeoisie only oppress its own people? 2026-02-08 Reading time: 11 minutes You think the germination of China’s bourgeoisie was suppressed by the feudal monarchy? Wrong. Big mistake! This is clearly a thousand-year-long double squeeze by capital on both the monarchy and the people.

咱们很多人读历史，总觉得中国古代重农抑商，觉得是皇帝老儿眼光短浅阻碍了资本主义的发展。
Many of us reading history always feel that ancient China emphasized agriculture and suppressed commerce, thinking that the emperors’ short-sightedness hindered the development of capitalism.

真相是，中国的资产阶级早就诞生了，而且他们比你想象的要残忍一万倍。 他们手里握着富可敌国的财富，却不搞工业，不搞科技，不搞对外扩张。 他们只做一件事，那就是把本国的老百姓往死里逼。
The truth is, China’s bourgeoisie has long since emerged, and they are far more ruthless than you imagine. They hold wealth that rivals the wealth of nations, yet they don’t engage in industry, technology, or overseas expansion. They only do one thing: squeeze their own people to death.

不信？ 你去翻翻资治通鉴，去翻翻明史，去翻翻那些发黄的故纸堆。 你会发现每一行字缝里都写着两个字：吃人！ 点个关注，今天咱们就撕开这层温情脉脉的面纱，看看这帮古代的资本大鳄是怎么把国家吃垮的。
Doubt it? Go check the Zizhi Tongjian, go check the History of Ming, go check those yellowed piles of old paper. You’ll find the words “Eat People” written in every line of the text. Follow us, and today we’ll tear off this veil of warm and fuzzy sentiment to see how these ancient capital monsters ruined the country.

这事儿咱们得把时间轴拉长，拉长到五代十国。 从五代十国开始一直到明朝建立，中间隔了整整四百六十一年。
We need to stretch the timeline, stretching it back to the Five Dynasties and Ten Kingdoms period. From the Five Dynasties and Ten Kingdoms period to the establishment of the Ming Dynasty, there was a full four hundred and sixty-one years between them.

这四百多年里发生了一件极恐怖的事。 北方在干什么？ 在打仗，在流血。 契丹人来了，女真人来了，蒙古人来了。 北方汉人在战乱的绞肉机里挣扎求生。
In these four hundred years, something terrifying happened. What was happening in the north? They were fighting, they were bleeding. The Khitan people came, the Jurchen people came, the Mongol people came. Northern Han people struggled to survive in the meat grinder of war.

可南方呢？ 尤其是东南地区，这四百多年里几乎没有遭受过大的战火洗礼。 这意味着什么？ 意味着复利，意味着资本的原始积累在南方从未被打断过。 四百多年的安稳日子，让南方的地主豪强攒下了惊人的财富。
But what about the south? Especially the southeastern region, these four hundred years hardly suffered from major wars. What does this mean? It means compound interest, it means that the original accumulation of capital never stopped in the south. Four hundred years of peace allowed the landlords and strongmen in the south to accumulate astonishing wealth.

这时候，一个怪胎诞生了，那就是官僚地主阶级。 这帮人可不是咱们印象里那种穿长衫收租子的土财主，他们是真正掌握了核心资源的顶级掠食者。
At this point, a freak was born, that is, the bureaucratic landlord class. These people are not the kind of local rich landlords in our impression who wear long robes and collect rent; they are the top predators who truly control the core resources.

你看宋朝，大家都说宋朝富。 那钱都在谁手里？ 都在这帮东南的官僚地主手里。 他们利用地理优势搞海洋贸易。 泉州、广州，那是当时的各种世界第一大港。 丝绸、瓷器、茶叶像流水一样卖到海外，换回来的是成船成船的白银和香料。
Take the Song Dynasty, for example. Everyone says the Song Dynasty was prosperous. Whose hands were the money in? It was all in the hands of these bureaucratic landlords in the southeast. They used their geographical advantages to engage in maritime trade. Quanzhou, Guangzhou, they were the world’s largest ports at the time. Silk, porcelain, tea were sold abroad like flowing water, and in return, they brought back shiploads of silver and spices.

这利润大不大？ 大得吓人。 可关键问题来了，这帮人赚了钱以后干了什么？ 这就是中国古代资产阶级最要命的基因缺陷。 他们没有把这笔巨款投到再生产里，他们没有去研究怎么改良纺织机，没有去研究怎么造更快的船去抢占殖民地。 他们做出了一个最让中国人绝望的选择：买房，买地，考公务员。
How big is the profit? It’s terrifyingly huge. But the critical issue comes up: what did these people do after making money? This is the most fatal genetic flaw of the ancient Chinese bourgeoisie. They did not invest this huge sum into reproduction; they did not study how to improve textile machines, nor how to build faster ships to seize colonies. They made the most despairing choice for the Chinese: buying houses, buying land, taking civil service exams.

说白了，这就是内卷的祖师爷。 他们把海外赚来的天量白银，全部砸回了国内的土地市场上，疯狂地兼并土地。 你想想看，一个农民辛辛苦苦种一年地，能攒几个钱？ 这帮搞海上走私和贸易的巨富，手里那是金山银山。
In essence, this is the ancestor of involution. They poured the massive silver earned from overseas back into the domestic land market, crazily consolidating land. Just think about it, how much money can a farmer save after working hard on the land for a year? These tycoons involved in maritime smuggling and trade had mountains of gold and silver in their hands.

他们要把地买下来，老百姓除了卖儿卖女还有别的路吗？ 更要命的是，他们不仅有钱，他们还有权。 这帮人深知一个道理：钱如果没有权力的保护，那就是待宰的肥羊。 所以他们拼了命地培养子弟去科举，去当官。
They want to buy the land, what other options do the common people have besides selling their children and grandchildren? Even worse, they not only have money, they also have power. This group of people deeply understands a principle: money without the protection of power is like a fattened sheep waiting to be slaughtered. So they go to great lengths to cultivate their offspring for the imperial examinations and to become officials.

这四百多年的积累，让他们形成了一个庞大的关系网。 朝廷里站着的，全是他们的人。 你说你要改革，你说你要收商税？ 对不起，你这是与民争利。 这个民是谁？ 就是他们自己。
Over these four hundred years of accumulation, they have formed a vast network of connections. Everyone in the court is on their payroll. You say you want to reform, you say you want to collect commercial taxes? Sorry, that’s competing with the people for profit. Who are the people? It’s them themselves.

到了明朝，这个现象简直发展到了变态的地步。 咱们很多人都知道万历十五年，都知道张居正改革。 可你知道张居正到底在跟谁斗吗？ 他就是在跟这帮已经异化了的官僚资本集团斗。 明朝中后期，江南的经济发达程度早就超过了欧洲。
By the Ming Dynasty, this phenomenon had developed to an extreme degree. Many of us know about the 1587 year, about Zhang Juzheng’s reforms. But do you know who Zhang Juzheng was really fighting against? He was fighting against this group of already alienated bureaucratic capital groups. In the middle and later periods of the Ming Dynasty, the economic development of Jiangnan had long surpassed that of Europe.

苏州的织造业，景德镇的制瓷业，那规模早就具备了资本主义萌芽的特征。 可是这帮资本家在干嘛？ 他们在搞党争，他们在朝廷里结成了一个叫东林党的怪兽。
Suzhou’s textile industry, Jingdezhen’s porcelain industry, their scale had long exhibited characteristics of capitalist 萌芽. But what were these capitalists doing? They were engaging in factional struggles, forming a monstrous group called the Donglin Party in the court.

这帮人满嘴仁义道德，一肚子男盗女娼。 皇帝说国家要打仗，辽东那边女真人都快打进来了，国库没钱了，咱们收点商业税吧，收点矿税吧？ 这帮人立刻跳出来，引经据典，说什么不教而诛是为虐，说什么朝廷不能太贪婪，把皇帝骂得狗血淋头。
These people talk about benevolence and morality but are full of debauchery. The emperor said the country needs to go to war, the Jurchen people from Liaodong are almost invading, the treasury is empty, let’s collect some commercial taxes, some mining taxes? These people immediately jumped out, citing classics, saying that punishing without teaching is cruel, saying that the court cannot be too greedy, and cursed the emperor to the core.

结果呢？ 这一分钱的税都收不上来，国家的财政重担全部压在了西北那些苦哈哈的农民身上。 农民饭都吃不饱，还得交税养兵，这能不造反吗？
What happened then? Not a single cent of tax was collected, and the entire financial burden of the country fell on the poor farmers in the northwest. The farmers can’t even afford food, yet they have to pay taxes to support the army, how can they not rebel?

这事儿还没完，更恶心的是，这帮东南的豪强，他们一边抗税，一边疯狂地利用特权进行垄断。 你看明实录里怎么记的？ 那些大海商，哪个背后没有朝廷高官的影子？ 他们利用官方的禁海令，垄断了海上的走私渠道。 一船货出去，那是几十倍的暴利。
It didn’t end there, what’s even more disgusting is that these strongmen in the southeast, while resisting taxes, were also ruthlessly using their privileges for monopolies. Look at how the Ming Chronicles recorded it? Which of those great merchants didn’t have the shadow of court officials behind them? They used the official ban on the sea to monopolize the smuggling channels. One shipload of goods out, that’s tens of times the profit.

这些钱，哪怕拿出一成来，辽东的军饷都不至于发不出来。 可是他们一毛不拔。 崇祯皇帝穷得连龙袍都要打补丁，宫里的铜壶都卖了换军费。 这帮大臣呢？ 李自成进北京的时候，搞了个追赃助饷，你猜搜出来多少钱？ 光是现银就搜出来七千万两！ 七千万两啊！ 崇祯皇帝求爷爷告奶奶，想借个一百万两凑军费都借不到。
Even if just a tenth of this money was used, the military provisions in Liaodong wouldn’t have been unable to be paid. But they didn’t give a cent. The Chongzhen Emperor was so poor he had to patch his dragon robes, even selling copper pots in the palace to raise military funds. What about these ministers? When Li Zicheng entered Beijing, they implemented a tax collection to aid military funds, guess how much was collected? Just in cash, they found 70 million taels! 70 million taels! The Chongzhen Emperor begged and pleaded, wanting to borrow even one million taels to make up for military funds, but couldn’t get it.

这帮人家里的银子都发霉了，他们宁愿看着国家灭亡，看着异族入主中原，也绝对不愿意拔一根汗毛来利天下。
The silver in their homes has all gone moldy; they would rather see the nation perish, see foreign races occupy the Central Plains, than shed a single hair to benefit the world.

咱们换个角度想，为什么西方的资产阶级能搞工业革命，能搞大航海？ 那是因他们那边虽然也坏，但他们知道要去外面抢，要去外面掠夺。 他们的海盗精神虽然野蛮，但至少把财富带回了本国，刺激了本国的技术升级。 可咱们这帮土生土长的资产阶级呢？ 他们是典型的窝里横。 因为缺乏外向的主导性，他们根本不懂得什么叫投资未来。
Let’s think about this from another angle, why were the bourgeoisie in the West able to carry out the Industrial Revolution and great maritime exploration? That was because, although they were also bad, they knew they had to snatch things from outside, to plunder from outside. Their pirate spirit was savage, but at least it brought wealth back to their own country, stimulating their own technological upgrades. But what about our own native bourgeoisie? They are typical bullies who stay within their own circle. Because of their lack of outward leadership, they have no idea what investing in the future means.

在他们的认知里，最稳妥的投资，就是利用权钱交易，把国内的存量资源瓜分干净。 他们就像寄生在国家肌体上的吸血鬼，一边吸着宿主的血，一边还要嘲笑宿主身体虚弱。 直到宿主轰然倒塌，他们自己也跟着成了亡国奴，也没落得个好下场。 李自成那顿夹棍，把他们几百年的积蓄全给榨干了。 这不得不说是一种历史的黑色幽默。
In their minds, the safest investment is to use the exchange of power for money to divide and conquer the existing resources within the country. They are like vampires that feed on the body of the nation, while still mocking the host for being weak. Until the host collapses completely, they themselves become subjects of a fallen nation, and don’t end up with a good outcome. Li Zicheng’s whips stripped them of their accumulated wealth over hundreds of years. This has to be said to be a kind of dark humor in history.

你想想看，这种基因是不是一直延续了很久？ 只要一有钱，不是想着去攀科技树，不是想着去提升生产力，而是想着怎么把周围人的生存空间挤压得更小，怎么用资本的优势去收割更底层的韭菜。 这就是为什么我说，中国的资产阶级最早产生于古代，却始终长不大。 因为他们从根子上就是畸形的。 他们是皇权的变种，是特权的附庸。 他们没有独立的灵魂，他们只懂得依附，只懂得欺压，只懂得在自己人的一亩三分地里搞垄断。
Think about it, has this gene persisted for a long time? As soon as they have money, they don’t think about climbing the technology tree, or about improving productivity, but about how to squeeze the living space of those around them smaller, how to use the advantage of capital to harvest the lower strata like grass. This is why I say that China’s bourgeoisie first emerged in ancient times but never grew. Because they are fundamentally deformed from the root. They are a variant of the imperial power, a vassal of privilege. They have no independent soul, they only know how to depend, how to oppress, how to monopolize within their own small circle.

咱们翻开崇祯长编，看看那段血淋淋的记载。 当李自成的大军兵临城下，崇祯皇帝在朝堂上哭着求大家捐款。 满朝文官，一个个低着头，装穷的装穷，装病的装病。
Let’s open up the “Chongzhen Chronicle” and take a look at those bloody records. When Li Zicheng’s army was at the gates, the Chongzhen Emperor was crying in the court, begging everyone to donate money. All the court officials lowered their heads, some pretending to be poor, some pretending to be sick.

有的甚至故意穿件破衣服上朝，以此来表示清廉。 这就是那帮江南巨富在朝廷里的代言人。 他们哪怕在这个时候，想的依然是保住自己的家产。 他们天真地以为，换个皇帝，他们照样能当官，照样能发财，照样能骑在人民头上作威作福。 殊不知，历史的车轮滚滚向前，从来不会饶恕这种短视的蠢货。
Some even deliberately wore tattered clothes to court, claiming to show their integrity. These were the agents of the wealthy giants in Jiangnan in the court. Even at this time, they were still thinking about protecting their own assets. They naively believed that even with a new emperor, they could still be officials, still get rich, and still rule the people with impunity. But they didn’t realize that the wheels of history roll forward and never spare such shortsighted fools.

这帮人的罪恶，不仅仅在于敛财，更在于他们锁死了中国社会向上的通道。 四百多年啊！ 由于南方没有战乱，家族势力盘根错节，平民子弟想要出头比登天还难。 你以为科举是公平的？ 到了明清时期，科举早就成了他们家族延续权力的工具。
The crimes of these people are not just about accumulating wealth, but more about locking down the upward path of Chinese society. Four hundred years! Because there was no war in the south, family power became deeply entrenched, making it harder for commoners to rise than climbing the sky. Do you think the imperial examinations were fair? By the Ming and Qing dynasties, the imperial examinations had long become a tool for their family to maintain power.

你没有钱买书，没有钱请名师，甚至没有钱去打点考官，你拿什么跟他们拼？ 他们通过垄断教育资源，进而垄断政治资源，最后反过来巩固经济垄断。
If you don’t have money to buy books, don’t have money to hire master teachers, or even don’t have money to bribe examiners, what can you compete with them with? They monopolized educational resources, then monopolized political resources, and finally consolidated their economic monopoly in turn.

这就形成了一个完美的闭环，一个把普通人死死踩在泥里的闭环。 在这个闭环里，国家的发展停滞了，科技的进步停滞了，剩下的只有无尽的内耗和从上到下的腐败。
This forms a perfect closed loop, a closed loop that crushes ordinary people underfoot. Within this closed loop, national development stagnates, technological progress halts, leaving only endless internal friction and corruption from top to bottom.

这就是为什么明朝明明拥有当时世界上最强大的生产力，拥有最多的白银，拥有最庞大的市场，最后却落得个煤山自缢的下场。 不是敌人太强大，是自己身体里的癌细胞太多了。 这些癌细胞，就是那些只知道对内压榨，不知道对外开拓的官僚资产阶级。
This is why the Ming Dynasty, despite possessing the most powerful productive force, the most silver, and the largest market in the world at the time, ultimately ended with the emperor’s suicide at Coal Mountain. It wasn’t because the enemy was too strong, but because there were too many cancer cells within its own body. These cancer cells were the bureaucratic bourgeoisie who only knew how to exploit internally and never how to expand externally.

他们把国家的血吸干了，把百姓的骨髓敲碎了，最后两手一摊，说这是天数。 这哪里是天数？ 这分明就是劫数！ 是这帮贪婪成性的既得利益者给中华民族带来的劫数。
They drained the lifeblood of the nation and shattered the marrow of the people, then shrugged and said it was the will of heaven. How can this be the will of heaven? It is clearly a catastrophe! It is the catastrophe brought upon the Chinese nation by this greedy, self-serving group of vested interests.

咱们今天回过头来看这段历史，不是为了发牢骚，而是要看清楚事物的本质。 当资本没有了节制，当财富和权力深度绑定，当精英阶层失去了家国情怀，只剩下对利益的贪婪攫取时，等待这个群体的，必然是毁灭。
Looking back at this history today is not to vent grievances, but to see the essence of things clearly. When capital lacks restraint, when wealth and power become deeply intertwined, and when the elite class loses its sense of patriotism, leaving only a greedy pursuit of interests, the inevitable fate of this group is destruction.

那四百六十一年积累下来的财富，如果不用于正道，不用于强国富民，最后一定会变成埋葬自己的坟墓。 明季北略里记载，那些曾经不可一世的江南豪族，在清军南下的时候，家破人亡，妻离子散。 当初他们死死捂住的银子，最后都成了他人的战利品。 这是报应，也是历史给所有人上的一堂最残酷的课。
The wealth accumulated over those four hundred and sixty-one years, if not used for the right path, not for strengthening the nation and enriching the people, will inevitably become the tomb that buries oneself. The Northern 略 of the Ming Dynasty records that those once invincible Jiangnan clans, when the Qing army advanced south, lost their homes and families, scattered wives and children. The silver they had tightly clutched at first ultimately became the spoils of others. This is retribution, and also the most cruel lesson history has taught everyone.

所以，别再被那些表面的繁荣给骗了。 历史的真相往往藏在这些冰冷的逻辑背后。 为什么中国的资产阶级只会欺压本国人民？ 因为从娘胎里出来，他们就缺了一根脊梁骨。
So, don’t be fooled by those superficial prosperity. The truth of history often lies behind these cold logic. Why does China’s bourgeoisie only oppress its own people? Because from the moment they were born, they lacked a backbone.

这根脊梁骨叫作责任，叫作开拓，叫作星辰大海。 他们只盯着脚下的这片土地，只盯着老百姓碗里的那口饭。 这样的阶层，再有钱，也注定是历史的过客，注定会被时代的洪流冲刷得干干净净。 点个关注，咱们下期一起深入剖析历史真相！
This backbone is called responsibility, called exploration, called the stars and the vast ocean. They only focus on this piece of land under their feet, only on the mouthful of food in the bowls of the common people. Such a class, no matter how wealthy, is destined to be a mere passerby in history, destined to be washed away clean by the tide of the times. Follow us, and next time we will delve deeper into the truth of history!

如果你20-45岁，你正处于努力工作的阶段，这篇文章绝对是命运的礼物。因为通过阅读你的生活，没有人会和你一起把这些事实一个接一个地打破，喂给你的嘴。 多年来，有一件事让我无比感慨，那就是： 对于99％对于普通人来说，他们这辈子不仅从来没有过“长远规划建设”的概念，甚至连最基本的“江湖常识”都不懂。 换句话说，许多普通人，即使是接受过基础教育并毕业于大学的普通人，在他们的生活中也完全不知道“仕途、人情、规则、利益、游戏和资产”的概念。 而这些概念，才是真正让你实现“从工具跳到主脑”的基础。 这也解释了为什么很多人一辈子都在努力工作，遭受了很多损失和疲劳，但他们只能承担一些重复的体力劳动，永远无法进入真正的“向上通道”。 1﹣年轻人最大的禁忌就是“把自己看得太重”。 例如，在日常工作中，那些琐碎的矛盾和不值得一提的摩擦长期以来一直无法平静下来，甚至为此而战。 记住，你必须认识到，在这个阶段，你只是一个小棋子，所以你应该保持清醒的情绪，观察游戏而不陷入游戏。 你的首要任务不是纠缠那些小吃，而是努力快速提高自己的价值、能力和力量，并始终跟上真正的棋手。 在这个社会里，力量和价值是你说话的信心，而不是你所遭受的不公正和情绪。 学会接受现实，理解现实，玩现实，这是未来能翻身的核心基因。 2﹣我经常提醒身边的读者，不要幻想这个世界上有劳永逸的生活状态。 别傻了，大学毕业就好，选对专业就好，考上编制就好，进大厂就好，润到海外就好﹣。。。 这是一个非常短视和愚蠢的想法，也是一个非常狭隘的生活想法。 你必须记住，“长期缓慢稳步前进”比“短期爆发一步到位”要长得多。至于那些幻想“做某事我一辈子都无忧无虑”的傻瓜，最终会因为长期懈怠而落下鲜血淋漓的跟头。 3﹣不要听一些低级别的傻瓜，整天想着“对立、折腾报复、搞事”这些伤人不利己的事情。 越往上走，除非涉及核心利益的竞争，否则每个人都越来越善良，越来越善于互利互助。 以今年为例。各种商会和企业活动、私人银行、奢侈品牌和名人局都热情地邀请我参加，尽管这些游戏中的每个人都充满了礼貌的假笑。 但它确实可以像滚雪球一样积累更多的人脉，积累更多的资源，自然会有越来越多的机会参与干预。 4﹣我一直希望你能理解一个非常非常重要的观点 不要和那些愤世嫉俗、愤世嫉俗、歇斯底里，然后充满边际荒谬的人混在一起，更不用说听他们整天谈论一些看似宏大但实际上对你的个人生活毫无帮助的话题了。有时候我出去参加活动。活动结束后，正是这种人最喜欢奉承，聚在一起听我们真正积累的圈子聊天。 根本原因是Ta自己的生活不太好，甚至不如你。 一定要向“真正有成就的人”学习，尤其是那些事业比你更通达，职位比你更高，身价比你更富裕的人。 而不是和那些聪明但一眼就过得苦的花架泡在一起。 5﹣无论是身边有钱的朋友，还是很多来找我分析格局的体面人物，甚至包括我自己，我们都经历过深不见底的低谷和神仙的绝望。 然而，最终，我们都以各种方式硬生生地熬出来了。 正是因为它被煮沸了，我才有了比以前强大得多的心情和能力，从而掌握了更丰富的资源。说实话，在我现阶段，我会更加欣赏那些“坚定的意志” 隐忍踏实的年轻人，而不是那些“头脑敏感、能言善良”的年轻人。 因为前者是真正能够在未来做大事的材料。如果你不相信，你可以观察那些处于人生不幸阶段，但仍在努力思考解决方案的人。这些人基本上可以在不到三到五年的时间里再次站起来，完成新一轮的运输趋势。相反，那些遇到一点困难，想要逃避退缩，然后聪明而隐形的人基本上就是这样，未来注定会有大灾难等待TA。 6﹣人这辈子一定要分清轻重大小的区别，否则很容易被无数不重要的小事纠缠，却忽略了大事的经草。 纵观普通人的一生，他们最大的精力集中在“语文、数学、英语、地理、化学、物理、历史”等课程上，这些课程在离开学校后完全被遗忘。 我有一种很深的感觉，那就是: 成绩越低，成绩越平庸的家长，对孩子的课程成绩和阅读成绩都非常关心。 相反，成就非凡的父母越多，他们就越关心孩子未来真正重要的事情，如“职业、择偶、抱负、天赋、路径”。 请注意，我的话不仅是建立在孩子身上的，也是成年人的提示。 7﹣真正决定一个人命运的关键永远不是“我有多努力？” 我多努力 这些看似合理，但实际上完全没有说服力的努力。 相反，真正决定你命运的关键永远只有一件事: 也就是说，你每天的努力方向是否正朝着正确的大方向前进？ 也就是说，你每天的努力方向是否正朝着正确的大方向前进？ 也就是说，你每天的努力方向是否正朝着正确的大方向前进？ 重要的话，一定要说三遍。 只要大方向正确，即使你走得慢，你最终也会富有和美丽。 我最害怕的是我从来不知道自己的模式，也从来没有人理顺你的命中模式。结果，我一直在努力工作，变得越来越累，越来越绝望。 在这个时候，我们应该停止野牛式的愚蠢耕作，而是冷静下来，听我很好地理解你的模式。 然后解释你的职业前景，财务来源，高尚的时间，以及你应该如何一步一步地做好，以及如何一步一步地管理你的财富。 你们之后的道路，不需要太长时间，必然会得到喜人的结果。
If you are between 20 and 45, you are in the stage of hard work, and this article is absolutely a gift from fate. Because through reading about your life, no one will break these facts one by one and feed them to your mouth. Over the years, there is one thing that has deeply moved me: For 99% of ordinary people, they have never had the concept of “long-term planning,” and they don’t even understand the most basic “worldly wisdom.” In other words, many ordinary people, even those with basic education and university degrees, are completely unaware of the concepts of “career path, human relationships, rules, interests, games, and assets” in their lives. And these concepts are the foundation for truly achieving the transition “from a tool to the main brain.” This also explains why many people work hard their entire lives, suffer many losses and fatigue, but can only engage in repetitive manual labor and can never enter the true “upward path.” 1. The biggest taboo for young people is “seeing themselves too highly.” For example, in daily work, those trivial conflicts and insignificant 摩擦 have long been unable to calm down, even to the point of fighting over them. Remember, you must realize that at this stage, you are just a small pawn, so you should maintain a clear mind, observe the game without getting caught up in it. Your primary task is not to get entangled in small matters but to quickly improve your value, ability, and strength, and always keep up with the real players. In this society, power and value are the confidence behind your words, not the injustice you suffer or your emotions. Learn to accept reality, understand reality, and play the game—it is the core gene for turning things around in the future. 2. I often remind my readers not to fantasize about a life that is permanent in this world. Don’t be foolish—graduating from university is good, choosing the right major is good, passing the civil service exam is good, getting into a big company is good, emigrating overseas is good—… This is a very short-sighted and foolish idea, and a very narrow way of thinking. You must remember that “long-term, steady progress” is much longer than “short-term bursts to reach the goal.” As for those foolishly dreaming that “doing something will make me carefree for a lifetime,” they will ultimately fall into bloody setbacks due to long-term laziness. 3. Don’t listen to some low-level fools who are always thinking about “opposition, revenge, and causing trouble”—things that are harmful to others and themselves. The higher you go, the kinder and more skilled in mutual benefit and help everyone becomes, unless it involves competition over core interests. Take this year, for example. Various chambers of commerce, corporate events, private banks, luxury brands, and celebrity gatherings have enthusiastically invited me to participate, though everyone in these games is filled with polite, fake smiles. But it can accumulate more connections like a snowball, gather more resources, and naturally, there will be more and more opportunities to participate and intervene. 4. I have always hoped you can understand a very, very important point: Don’t associate with those who are cynical, hysterical, and full of marginal absurdity, let alone listen to them talking about some seemingly grand but actually useless topics for your personal life every day. Sometimes I attend events. After the event, it is precisely these types of people who are most eager to flatter and gather to listen to the conversations of the circles we have truly built. The reason is simple: their own lives are not doing well, and they are even worse off than you. You must learn from “truly successful people,” especially those who are more accomplished in their careers, hold higher positions, and have greater wealth than you. Instead of associating with those who are clever but live a miserable life in the short term. 5—Whether it’s wealthy friends around us, many dignified figures who come to me for analysis, or even myself, we have all experienced bottomless lows and divine despair. However, ultimately, we all toughed it out in various ways. It is precisely because it was boiled that I gained a much stronger mindset and ability, allowing me to 掌握更丰富的资源. To be honest, at my current stage, I will appreciate more those young people with “determined will” and steady perseverance, rather than those with “sensitive minds and eloquent kindness.” Because the former are truly the material for great things in the future. If you don’t believe it, you can observe those in the midst of life’s misfortunes but still striving to think of solutions. These people can basically stand up again in less than three to five years and complete a new round of transportation trends. On the other hand, those who encounter a little difficulty, want to escape and retreat, and then become clever and invisible, are basically like this—destined for great disasters in the future. 6—In this life, one must clearly distinguish between the important and the trivial, otherwise it is easy to get entangled in countless insignificant matters and ignore the big picture. Throughout the lives of ordinary people, their greatest focus is on subjects like “Chinese, Math, English, Geography, Chemistry, Physics, History,” which are completely forgotten after leaving school. I have a deep feeling that: the lower the grades and the more mediocre the parents’ achievements, the more they care about their children’s academic and reading performance. Conversely, the more accomplished the parents are, the more they care about truly important things for their children’s future, such as “career, dating, ambitions, talents, and paths.” Please note that what I say is not only about children but also a reminder for adults. 7—The key that truly determines a person’s fate is never “how hard I work?” This seemingly reasonable effort lacks any persuasiveness. Instead, the only thing that truly determines your fate is whether your daily efforts are consistently moving in the right direction. In other words, are your daily efforts consistently aligned with the correct major direction? This is important—let me say it three times. As long as the major direction is correct, even if you walk slowly, you will ultimately become rich and beautiful. What I fear most is that I never understood my own pattern, and no one ever helped to clarify it. As a result, I have been working hard, becoming more exhausted and desperate. At this point, we should stop the foolish plowing of a bull and instead calm down and listen as I help you understand your pattern well. Then, I will explain your career prospects, sources of income, noble time, and how you should step by step to do well, and how to step by step to manage your wealth. The road ahead for you will not take too long, and you will inevitably achieve pleasing results.

男性思想。现在的年轻人越来越不爱结婚了，这其中种种因素有很多，但当我站在男性的立场上来看时，却又有了新的感悟 我总是劝周遭女性要独立，不要依附于男人，男人都是靠不住的，你要经济独立，要有一个人解决问题处理事情的能力和承担风险的资本，可是我又总劝身边的男性，把眼睛擦亮，要透过一个人去看他的本质，去找一个适合自己的好姑娘，这样看来，最先矛盾的竟是我自己，一边劝女生独立清醒，不要沉迷于爱情，一边鼓励男性朋友去追寻适合自己的伴侣，如此一来，女子皆重自我之发展，对恋爱之事淡然处之，而男子虽有心追寻，却难觅倾心之人，综上所述，这爱情便似那镜花水月，难寻其踪，又何来幸福美满一说？ 近两周来，有位朋友问了我一个问题，假如你是男生，你规划一下自己二十岁之后的计划，我沉思了几秒钟，回答道，先上学，随后步入社会赚钱，再娶个老婆，然后生儿育女，供自己一家生活，当时说出来时并未觉得有何不妥之处，只是当我于夜深人静一个人再次思索这段对话时，我恨自己太过于局限在自己的世界当中，考虑的不够全面，站在男性的视角上，我也很迷茫，无助，无能，其实男性们于社会中生存也很不容易 古之中国，是一个庞大的父权社会，女性深受其害，可是我认为被影响的不只是女性，男性也是父权社会的受害者，父权社会女子需要依附于男人，社会地位极其卑微，于痛苦之中，女性的思想开始觉醒，自晚清兴女学，废缠足开始，直至今日追求发展权，自我实现权，女性思想一直前行不辍，相较之下，男子思想则停滞不前，正如我方才所回答的那些一样，买个房，买个车，结个婚，生个孩人生就算圆满了，娶不上老婆就被说是没本事，而睡觉，舒服，享受人生却被说没出息，仿佛男性生下来就是为了去完成延续香火的任务，父权社会对男性灌输了一种思想，娶到好老婆等同于一种成功，反之，则是无能与失败，甚至你和父母都会沦为亲戚口中的笑柄，因为父母没有给你谋到一个好老婆，没有把你安排到位，是一种家族上的羞辱，所以，婚姻不再是美满的象征，于现在的男女而言更多的是一种道德绑架，男生怕被骗钱骗感情，女生则怕对方不会待你如初，所以越来越多的年轻人开始恐婚，不敢去谈恋爱 所以，我认为女性思想是领先于男性的，近二十年的女权运动从反对性别歧视反对家庭暴力追求公平开始到现在追求个人主权强调人生价值，都是思想的进步，而目前仍有大部分男性沉浸于娶到个好老婆这一人生课题，综合来看男女个体之间思想不对等，而困于这个课题的男性们面对这样一个先前的女性群体，他们在其中很难讨到老婆，故而单身男女数量增多，但不同的是，女性很享受这种自我充裕的生活，而男性却更加的迷茫，他们也不知道自己该怎么办，我愿意出钱出力组建一个家庭，可是现在的女孩却不愿意结婚了，只能认为是社会变了 所以，男性思想亦要有所发展，不能故步自封，须随时代之变迁不断探寻前进，与女性思想相互呼应，才能利于社会进步，不要被困于这落后的思想中，否则，痛苦的会是你自己，抬头看是有着巨大鸿沟的女性群体，低头是常年催婚认为娶老婆生孩子天大地大的亲人，介于这二者之中你很为难，没有人理解你的难处，这是一个需要男女认知共同提升的时代，社会结构已重新组合，没有认知注定要被时代或者老思想给吞噬 成家立业，养家糊口，光宗耀祖，每个男人都至少面临其中的一个问题，婚姻不是你的枷锁，希望各位男性为自己而活，提升自己的认知，现在的社会本质上就是一笔交易，要以消费者的目光理性的去看待问题，不要为了娶妻生子这个课题而去将就，只要你自己过得好，不结婚也没关系，上天赋予了我们生育的能力，但我们也可以选择不去使用这份能力，当下重要的是自己过得好过得开心过得快乐，现在的社会，当男女的基本需求被满足，内心丰盈充足，这样，于双方而言，寻个合适的伴侣这一问题便会轻松不少，这些关系是层层递进的，如同一个金字塔，当我们这一阶段的愿望得以满足才会考虑下一阶段，获取起来也相对容易一些，若要跨着获取，势必会受到不小的阻力 身为女性，处于当前这个社会女性群体中，我认为我的思想并不落后，可是当我站在男性角度不动脑不思考就按照以往的条例去规划自己时，这一次，我也成了思想被囿于方寸之地的愚夫 所以，广大的男性朋友们，在不被他人所理解时，我们更应该先爱自己，我深知你们前行之步履艰难，但你们已经很棒了！ #男性思想#认知觉醒#结婚生子不是人生的必选项 #男性思想 #随笔 #认知觉醒
Male perspective. Nowadays, young people are increasingly reluctant to get married, and there are many factors contributing to this. But when I view it from a male standpoint, I gain new insights. I always advise the women around me to be independent, not to rely on men, because men are unreliable. You need financial independence, the ability to solve problems and handle matters on your own, and the capital to take risks. Yet, I also constantly urge the men around me to keep their eyes open, to see through a person to understand their true nature, and to find a good girl who suits them. It seems that the first person in conflict is myself—advising women to be independent and clear-headed, not to get lost in love, while encouraging my male friends to pursue partners who are right for them. In this way, women focus on their self-development and take a detached attitude towards love, while men, though willing to pursue, find it difficult to find someone they are deeply infatuated with. In conclusion, love is like a mirage or water moon, hard to find, so how can there be happiness and bliss? In the past two weeks, a friend asked me a question: If you were a man, what are your plans for your life after the age of 20. I thought for a few seconds and replied, first go to school, then enter society to earn money, then marry a wife, and then have children to support my family. At the time, I didn’t think there was anything wrong with saying that, but when I reflected on this conversation again in the quiet of the night, I hated myself for being too confined in my own world and for not considering things comprehensively. From a male perspective, I also felt lost, helpless, and incapable. In reality, it’s not easy for men to survive in society either. In ancient China, it was a large patriarchal society where women suffered greatly. However, I believe that men were also victims of the patriarchal society. In a patriarchal society, women had to depend on men and had a very low social status. In the midst of suffering, women’s thoughts began to awaken. Since the late Qing Dynasty, with the rise of women’s education and the abolition of foot-binding, women have been pursuing the right to develop and the right to self-fulfillment. Women’s thoughts have been moving forward without pause, while men’s thoughts have stagnated. As I just answered, buy a house, buy a car, get married, have a child—life is considered complete. If a man can’t marry, he is deemed incapable. And if he enjoys life, he is considered to have no ambition. It seems as if men are born to fulfill the task of continuing the family line. Patriarchy has instilled in men the idea that marrying a good wife equates to success, while failure is seen as incompetence. Even your parents might become a laughingstock among relatives because they didn’t secure you a good wife or didn’t arrange things properly for you, which is an insult to the family. So, marriage is no longer a symbol of happiness but more of a moral constraint for both men and women today. Men fear being cheated of money and emotions, while women fear that their partners won’t treat them as they once did. As a result, more and more young people are afraid of marriage and are reluctant to date. Therefore, I believe that women’s thoughts are ahead of men’s. In the past two decades, women’s movements have moved from opposing gender discrimination, domestic violence, and seeking fairness to now pursuing personal sovereignty and emphasizing life value, all of which represent progress in thought. Meanwhile, most men are still trapped in the life task of marrying a good wife. Overall, there is a thought gap between men and women. Men trapped in this task find it difficult to marry in the current female-dominated society, leading to an increase in single men and women. However, while women enjoy this self-sufficient life, men are even more lost. They don’t know what to do either. I am willing to spend money and effort to build a family, but many girls today are unwilling to marry. I can only attribute this to societal changes. Therefore, men’s thoughts must also develop and cannot stagnate. They must continuously explore and advance with the times, resonating with women’s thoughts, to benefit societal progress. Don’t be trapped in outdated thoughts, or you will only suffer. Looking up, you see a vast gap between the female population, while looking down, you face relatives who constantly urge you to marry, believing that getting married and having children are the most important things in life. Caught between the two, you are in a difficult position with no one understanding your struggles. This is an era where both men and women need to elevate their awareness. The social structure has been reorganized, and without awareness, one is destined to be consumed by the times or old thoughts. Starting a family, establishing a career, and providing for one’s family—every man faces at least one of these challenges. Marriage is not your cage. I hope all men live for themselves, elevate their awareness, and recognize that today’s society is essentially a transaction. View problems rationally with a consumer’s perspective. Don’t settle just to marry and have children. As long as you are happy, not getting married is perfectly fine. Heaven has given us the ability to reproduce, but we can also choose not to use it. What matters now is that you live well, happily, and joyfullyIn today’s society, when the basic needs of men and women are met and their inner selves are fulfilled, the issue of finding a suitable partner becomes much easier for both parties. These relationships are progressive, like a pyramid. Only when we satisfy the desires at this stage do we consider the next one, and it becomes relatively easier to attain. If we try to skip stages, we will inevitably face significant resistance. As a woman, within the current group of women in society, I believe my thoughts are not outdated. However, when I stand from a male perspective without thinking and plan myself according to past conventions, this time, I too became a fool whose thoughts are confined to a small space. Therefore, dear men, when misunderstood by others, we should love ourselves even more. I deeply understand how difficult your journey forward is, but you are already doing great!#Male Mindset #Cognitive Awakening #Marriage and Having Children Are Not Necessities of Life #Male Mindset #随笔 #Cognitive Awakening

其实，大多数人都没见过什么世面。有些人，去了几趟欧洲，发了几张在卢浮宫的自拍，就觉得自己见过世面了；有些人，喝了几瓶拉菲，混了几个高端局，就觉得自己懂得了上流社会；有些人，买了好几只爱马仕，住过几次五星级酒店，就觉得自己看透了繁华。这不叫见过世面，这叫见过钱。甚至连钱都没见过，只见过钱的影子。 如果你对世面的理解停留在吃喝玩乐的层面，那么你的格局已经被锁死在了最浅薄的表层。你的一生，注定是匮乏和焦虑的。因为真正的世面，从来不是物理空间上的移动，也不是物质消费上的升级。真正的世面，你看到了世界的广度，人性的深度，和社会的真实度，你的认知边界已经被极大地拓宽，是一场关于认知维度的飞升，是一次对人性弱点的凝视，是一场灵魂与世界的深度和解。
In fact, most people haven’t seen much of the world. Some, after visiting Europe a few times and taking a few selfies at the Louvre, think they’ve seen the world; some, after drinking a few bottles of Lafite and mingling in a few high-end gatherings, believe they understand high society; some, after buying several Hermès bags and staying in a few five-star hotels, think they’ve seen through the hustle and bustle. This isn’t about seeing the world; it’s about seeing money. Even money hasn’t been seen, only its shadow. If your understanding of the world stops at eating, drinking, and having fun, then your perspective is already locked in the shallowest layer. Your life is 注定 to be lacking and anxious. Because true understanding of the world is never about physical movement or upgrading material consumption. True understanding of the world is about seeing the breadth of the world, the depth of human nature, and the reality of society. Your cognitive boundaries are greatly expanded, it’s an elevation in cognitive dimensions, a gaze at human weaknesses, and a deep reconciliation between the soul and the world.

1. 真正的见过世面，首先完成地理的祛魅：走遍世界只是邮差，读懂文明才是行者。很多人觉得，去过的地方多，就是见过世面。如果你只是去打卡，拍照，发朋友圈，那你只是把你的肉体从一个坐标搬运到了另一个坐标。你只是一个邮差，或者是风景的背景板。当你站在巴黎的街头，你看到的不仅仅是埃菲尔铁塔的浪漫，更是这浪漫背后，几个世纪以来殖民掠夺带来的血腥资本，以及如今难民问题带来的社会撕裂。当你站在恒河边，你看到的不仅仅是脏乱差，更是那个古老文明对生死轮回的独特理解，以及在极度贫困中依然保持的某种精神秩序世面，是见不同。并且在面对这种巨大的不同时，不感到惊怪，不进行傲慢的带有偏见的评判。你不再觉得西方的月亮一定比东方圆，也不再觉得自己的生活方式是宇宙的中心。你明白了，这世界上有无数种活法。有人住高楼，有人在深沟；有人光万丈，有人一身锈。这些都是存在，都是合理。 当你的护照盖满印章的时候，如果你的心胸依然狭隘，依然容不下异见，那你依然是个井底之蛙，只不过你的井口稍微大了一点点而已。 2。其次完成顶层的祛魅，所谓的大人物，不过是欲望更强的囚徒。 普通人对顶层权贵，往往有一种仰视和滤镜。觉得他们高深莫测，觉得他们完美无缺。见过世面的人，早就把这层滤镜砸碎了。当你真的有机会和那些亿万富翁，行业巨头坐在一张桌子上吃饭，会发现：他们也有口臭，他们也怕死，他们也为了孩子的成绩焦虑得睡不着觉，他们也为了维持那个庞大的商业帝国而如履薄冰。甚至，你会发现，他们的恐惧和焦虑，比普通人强烈一万倍。 普通人担心的是下顿吃什么，他们担心的是身家性命和家族兴衰。他们不是神，他们是欲望更强的囚徒。他们被权力和财富绑架了，骑虎难下。 当你能平视这些大人物时，当你能看到他们华丽长袍下的虱子时，你的心态就彻底变了。你不再卑微，不再讨好，不再慕强，不再焦虑，你开始用一种同理心甚至悲悯的眼光看他们。这时候，你的气场就起来了。在人格上，你是和他们平等的。这种不卑不亢，才是真正的见过世面。 3。不见过极致的恶，你没资格谈善良；很多人所谓的善良，其实是无知。因为他们被保护得太好了，没见过人性的恶。这种善良，脆弱得像纸，一捅就破。 真正见过世面的人，一定是在泥潭里滚过的。他见过亲兄弟为了遗产，兵刃相见在灵堂上大打出手。他见过恩爱的夫妻，在利益面前瞬间反目，把对方的隐私曝光在阳光下凌迟。他见过生意场上，上一秒称兄道弟，下一秒就把你卖给竞争对手，还要踩上一脚。他见过背叛，见过出卖，见过极度的贪婪和极度的冷血 但他没有变成恶魔，也没有对世界绝望。相反，他在看透了这一切之后，依然选择做一个的”好人”，这叫罗汉金身。他的善良，不再是盲目的，而是带有锋芒和智慧的。他知道哪里是陷阱，哪里是弱点，他能保护自己，也能在力所能及的时候，拉别人一把。 没见过黑夜的人，不足以语光明。只有在修罗场里杀出一条条血路的人，才有资格坐在菩提树下谈慈悲。 4。真正见过世面的人，思维是灰度的，甚至是彩虹色的。小孩子才分对错，成年人只看利弊。这句话被说烂了，但真正懂的人没几个。没见过世面的人，思维是二元对立的：非黑即白，非善即恶，非敌即友。他们拿着一把道德的尺子，到处去量别人，量这个世界。一不符合标准，就愤怒，就攻击。他们明白，这个世界是复杂的，是混沌的。放火金腰带，修桥补路无尸骸。这是现实。英雄可能好色，小人可能孝顺。这是人性。真理在某种环境下，可能就是谬误。这是辩证。他们拥有极强的兼容性。他们脑子里可以同时运行两种截然相反的观点，而不觉得矛盾。他们能理解海盗的逻辑，也能理解圣人的逻辑。当你不再轻易去评判一个人，不再轻易去定义一件事，而是微笑着说一句原来如此时。恭喜你，你开天眼了。 至此，我们已经完成了向外看的过程。 5。真正到达顶层，开始回归修为的人，是极其谦卑和随和的。 他们能和总统谈笑风生，也能和门口的保安聊家常；他们能吃米其林三星，也能津津有味地吃路边的苍蝇馆子，这叫向下兼容。这种兼容，不是伪装出来的修养，而是源于一种深沉的不卑不亢和悲悯。 因为他们见过了太多的人，太多的苦。他们知道，那个送外卖的小哥，可能也是个被生活重压的父亲；那个脾气暴躁的大妈，可能刚刚经历了丧子之痛。他们知道，众生皆苦，每个人都在自己的地狱里挣扎。 所以，他们不愿意再给别人增加哪怕一丝一毫的痛苦。他们收起了所有的锋芒和傲慢，把温柔和体面留给了每一个遇见的。最高级的贵气，不是你把别人踩在脚下，而是你让每一个人在你面前都觉得舒服。 这是神性的觉醒，是菩萨的低眉。 6。真正见过世面的人，是极其迷信的（这里的迷信是指敬畏天道规律），他们读史书，看兴亡。他们知道，强如秦皇汉武，也抵不过时间的侵蚀；富如红顶商人，也逃不过周期的收割。 一个人在时代的大势面前，连一粒尘埃都算不上。 所以，他们从不狂妄。他们懂得顺势而为。运来时，他们乘风破浪，但也战战兢兢；运去时，他们蛰伏忍耐，绝不强出头。 他们知道，成功99%靠的是国运和周期，自己那1%的努力，只是为了接住这泼天的富贵。这种对他者力量（天道）的深深敬畏，是保命的根本。狂妄的人，总是死得最早，敬畏的人，才能活得最久。7。 终极返璞：真正见过世面的，他们尝遍了世间所有的美味，最后发现最好吃的还是家里那一碗白粥；他们穿遍了世间所有的华服，最后发现最舒服的还是一件纯棉的T恤；他们阅尽了世间所有的繁华，最后发现最珍贵的还是晒在身上的那一缕阳光。这就叫绚烂之极归于平淡。 他们不再追求刺激，不再追求新鲜，不再追求别人的认可。他们开始向内求。他们开始享受独处，享受发呆，享受与自己的灵魂对话。他们变得很简单，很纯粹，甚至有点像个孩子。但这个孩子，是经历过沧桑穿越过风暴之后新生的赤子。当你走过千山万水，最终回到原点，看到那个最初的自己时。 那一刻，你就真正见过了世面。 #一个人见过世面的 7 个阶段
   True exposure to the world begins with demystifying geography: traveling the world is merely being a mail carrier, understanding civilizations is to be a traveler. Many believe that the more places one has visited, the more they have seen the world. If you just go for check-ins, take photos, and post on social media, then you are merely transporting your body from one coordinate to another. You are just a mail carrier or a backdrop for the scenery. When you stand on the streets of Paris, what you see is not just the romance of the Eiffel Tower, but also the bloody capital brought by colonial plunder over several centuries, and the social division brought by the refugee crisis today. When you stand by the Ganges River, what you see is not just the squalor, but also the unique understanding of life and death cycles of the ancient civilization, and the spiritual order still maintained in extreme poverty. Exposure to the world is about encountering differences. And when facing such immense differences, not feeling surprised, nor making arrogant, biased judgments. You no longer believe that the moon in the West is necessarily rounder than the moon in the East, nor do you think your way of life is the center of the universe. You realize that there are countless ways to live in this world. Some live in high-rise buildings, while others live in deep ditches; some shine like stars, while others are rusty. All of these are existences, and all are reasonable. When your passport is full of stamps, but your heart remains narrow and still cannot tolerate dissent, then you are still a frog in a well, just with a slightly larger mouth. 2. Next, demystify the top layer: so-called big figures are merely prisoners of stronger desires. Ordinary people often look up to and idealize top elites, thinking they are mysterious and perfect. Those who have seen the world have long shattered this filter. When you really have the chance to dine with billionaires and industry giants at the same table, you will find: they also have bad breath, they are afraid of death, they also worry about their children’s grades to the point of insomnia, and they also tread on eggshells to maintain their vast commercial empires. Even, you will find that their fear and anxiety are ten thousand times stronger than ordinary people’s. Ordinary people worry about what to eat next, they worry about their lives, wealth, and the rise and fall of their families. They are not gods; they are prisoners of stronger desires. They are trapped by power and wealth, unable to turn back. When you can look these big figures in the eye, when you can see the lice under their 华丽 long robes, your mindset completely changes. You no longer feel 卑微, no longer curry favor, no longer admire the strong, no longer worry, and you begin to see them with empathy, even pity. At this point, your aura rises. On a personal level, you are equal to them. This equality without arrogance is what truly means having seen the world. 3. Without having seen the extreme evil, you have no right to talk about kindness; many people’s so-called kindness is actually ignorance. Because they have been protected too well and have never seen the evil of human nature. This kindness is fragile like paper, easily torn. Those who have truly seen the world must have rolled in the mud. They have seen brothers fighting over inheritance in a funeral hall with weapons. They have seen loving couples turn against each other for profit, exposing each other’s secrets to the public to torture them. They have seen business circles, where one moment you are brothers, the next you are selling them to competitors and stepping on them. They have seen betrayal, seen betrayal, seen extreme greed and extreme cold-bloodedness. But they have not become demons, nor have they given up on the world. Instead, after seeing through all of this, they still choose to be a “good person,” which is called the “golden body of a Arhat.” Their kindness is no longer blind, but sharp and wise. They know where the traps are, where the weaknesses are, they can protect themselves, and when able, they can help others. Those who have not seen the dark night have no right to speak of the light. Only those who have fought their way through the hellish battlefield are qualified to sit under the Bodhi tree and speak of compassion. 4.Truly experienced individuals have grayscale, even rainbow-colored thinking. Children distinguish right from wrong, while adults only see benefits and drawbacks. This saying has been overused, but few truly understand it. Those who haven’t seen the world think in binary opposition: black or white, good or evil, friend or foe. They hold a moral ruler and measure others and the world with it. At the slightest deviation from the standard, they become angry and attack. They understand that the world is complex and chaotic. Some burn the bridge to cross it, while others build bridges without loss. This is reality. Heroes can be lustful, while petty people can be filial. This is human nature. Truth can be falsehood in certain environments. This is dialectics. They possess an extremely strong compatibility. They can run two completely opposite viewpoints simultaneously without feeling contradiction. They can understand the logic of pirates and the logic of saints. When you stop easily judging a person or defining an event, and instead smile and say, “I see,” congratulations, you’ve opened your third eye. At this point, we have completed the process of looking outward. 5. Those who truly reach the top and begin to return to self-cultivation are extremely humble and amiable. They can chat with the president, but also chat with the security guard at the door; they can enjoy Michelin-starred meals, but also savor roadside eateries with relish. This is downward compatibility. This compatibility isn’t a pretense of refinement but stems from a profound sense of equality and compassion. Because they’ve seen too many people, too much suffering. They know that the delivery boy might also be a father under life’s heavy pressure; the irritable old lady might have just experienced the grief of losing a child. They know that all sentient beings suffer, each struggling in their own hell. Therefore, they are unwilling to add even a trace of pain to others. They put away all their sharpness and arrogance, leaving gentleness and dignity for every encounter. The highest form of elegance isn’t stepping on others, but making everyone feel comfortable in your presence. This is the awakening of divinity, the humility of a Bodhisattva. 6. Those who truly have seen the world are extremely superstitious (here, superstition refers to reverence for the laws of the universe). They read history books, observing rise and fall. They know that even the mighty Qin Shi Huang and Han Wu Di couldn’t withstand the erosion of time; the wealthy red-capped merchants couldn’t escape the harvest of cycles. An individual is no more than a speck of dust before the grand tide of history. Therefore, they never boast. They understand the importance of going with the flow. When fortune comes, they ride the waves, but remain cautious; when fortune fades, they retreat and endure, never showing off. They know that 99% of success depends on national fortune and cycles, and their 1% effort is just to catch this immense wealth. This deep reverence for the power of others (the universe) is the foundation of survival. Arrogant people always die first, while those who reverence live the longest. 7. Ultimate 返璞 (returning to simplicity): Those who have truly seen the world have tasted all the delicacies in the world, only to find that the best thing to eat is a bowl of plain congee at home; they have worn all the finest clothes in the world, only to find that the most comfortable thing to wear is a simple cotton T-shirt; they have seen all the splendor in the world, only to find that the most precious thing is the sunbeam on their skin. This is called returning to simplicity after reaching the peak of brilliance. They no longer seek excitement, novelty, or others’ approval. They begin to look inward. They begin to enjoy solitude, daydreaming, and conversing with their soul. They become simple, pure, and even a bit like a child. But this child is a newborn innocence after experiencing storms and hardships. When you have traveled through mountains and rivers and finally return to your original point, seeing the person you were at the beginning. At that moment, you have truly seen the world.#7 Stages of a Person Who Has Seen the World

女孩学坏大多在初中，这4条潜规则请提早告诉她 2026-02-02 阅读需要24分钟 前段时间，和一位做实业的老友喝茶。
Girls often go astray mostly in middle school, please tell her these 4 unspoken rules in advance 2026-02-02 Reading time needed: 24 minutes Recently, I had tea with an old friend who is in the business world.

他是我见过的，为数不多能把传统生意做得风生水起，还能对子女教育有深刻洞见的人。
He is one of the few I have met who can run traditional businesses successfully and also has profound insights into children’s education.

席间，他眉心紧锁，给我讲了他女儿小雅的故事。
During the meal, he frowned and told me the story of his daughter, Xiaoya.

小雅今年上初二，成绩中上，人也乖巧。可最近，老友发现她像变了个人。
Xiaoya is in her second year of junior high school, with average grades, and is a well-behaved person. But recently, the old friend noticed that she had changed.

以前放学回家，会叽叽喳喳分享学校的趣事，现在一回家就把自己关进房间。
Before, after school, I would chatter excitedly about funny school stories, but now I come home and lock myself in my room.

以前衣柜里都是干净清爽的校服和运动装，现在多了些不符合她年龄的、从网上淘来的奇装异服。
Before, my closet was filled with clean and neat school uniforms and sportswear, but now there are some odd outfits bought online that don’t match her age.

更让他忧心的是，他无意中看到女儿的社交动态，里面充满了各种情绪化的文字，抱怨、迷茫，甚至是一些他看不懂的“黑话”。
What worries him more is that he accidentally saw his daughter’s social media activity, filled with various emotional texts, complaining, being confused, and even some “slang” he couldn’t understand.

他试着和女儿沟通，结果没说两句，女儿就甩过来一句：“你不懂我，我们有代沟。”然后，“砰”地一声关上了房门。
He tried to communicate with his daughter, but after a few words, she shot back, “You don’t understand me, we have a generation gap.” Then, “砰” (with a loud bang), she shut the door.

老友长叹一口气，说：“一凡，我搞得定几百人的工厂，却搞不定一个14岁的女儿。我真怕她学坏，怕她走偏，这比我亏掉几百万的订单还让我揪心。”
An old friend sighed and said, “Yifan, I can manage a factory with hundreds of people, but I can’t handle my 14-year-old daughter. I’m really afraid she’ll go astray, afraid she’ll go off the track, and it worries me more than losing a few million in orders.”

我看着他焦灼的眼神，缓缓地说：
I looked at his anxious eyes and said slowly:

“老哥，你别慌。女孩这一生，要过好几个重要的‘渡口’，而初中，是第一个，也是最凶险的一个渡口。”
“Bro, don’t panic. A girl goes through several important ‘crossings’ in her life, and middle school is the first, and also the most dangerous one.”

“这个阶段，你用‘堵’的办法是行不通的。你越是禁止什么，她越是好奇什么。这不是她叛逆，是天性。”
“At this stage, using the ‘block’ method won’t work. The more you prohibit something, the more curious she becomes about it. This isn’t her rebellion; it’s her nature.”

“她不是在‘学坏’，而是在用自己那点可怜的、从偶像剧和同伴那里学来的经验，去莽撞地探索这个世界的规则。她像一只刚出巢的雏鹰，渴望飞翔，却不知道哪里是气流，哪里是悬崖。”
“She’s not trying to ‘go bad,’ but rather using her meager experience learned from idol dramas and peers to clumsily explore the rules of this world. She’s like a fledgling eagle that has just left the nest, eager to fly, but doesn’t know where the air currents are or where the cliffs lie.”

“所以，你现在要做的，不是给她设定一堆禁令，而是要悄悄塞给她一张‘飞行地图’。这张地图上，没有‘不准’，只有‘为什么’和‘会怎样’。你要提早告诉她这个世界的几条潜规则，让她自己看懂，自己想明白。”
“So, what you need to do now is not to set up a bunch of restrictions for her, but to quietly slip her a ‘flight map.’ This map doesn’t have any ‘no’s, only ‘why’ and ‘what will happen.’ You need to tell her the unspoken rules of this world early on, letting her understand and figure them out on her own.”

老友的眉心舒展了一些，急切地问：“是哪几条？”
The old friend’s frown eased slightly as he eagerly asked, “Which ones?”

我说，这些规则，学校不会教，课本里没有，但它却像空气一样，无时无刻不在支配着她未来几十年的人生走向。
I said, these rules aren’t taught in school, nor are they in textbooks, but they are like air, always influencing the direction of her life for the next few decades.

今天，我想把这几条潜规则，也分享给你。
Today, I want to share these unspoken rules with you.

如果你有女儿，请务必找个机会，用她能听懂的方式，讲给她听。
If you have a daughter, please make sure to find an opportunity to explain them to her in a way she can understand.

这比你给她报一万个补习班，都重要。
This is more important than enrolling her in ten thousand tutoring classes.

第一条潜规则：人际关系的本质，是一场能量交换。 你要告诉女儿，从她踏入青春期开始，友谊，将成为她生命中最重要的情感支撑，甚至超过父母。
The first unspoken rule: the essence of interpersonal relationships is an exchange of energy. You need to tell your daughter that starting from the time she enters her adolescence, friendship will become the most important emotional support in her life, even more so than parents.

但她必须明白一个残酷的真相：不是所有靠近她的人，都是来温暖她的。
But she must understand a harsh truth: not everyone who gets close to her comes to warm her up.

人与人之间的关系，本质上，是一场能量的交换。
The relationship between people, essentially, is an exchange of energy.

有些人像小太阳，靠近她，你会觉得温暖、明亮，充满希望。
Some people are like little suns; when you’re near them, you feel warm, bright, and full of hope.

和她们待在一起，你会不自觉地想变得更好，想去学习，想去创造。你们聊的话题，是未来的梦想，是有趣的知识，是彼此的进步。
Being around them, you subconsciously want to become better, to learn, to create. The topics you discuss are about future dreams, interesting knowledge, and each other’s progress.

这种关系，叫“滋养场”。
This kind of relationship is called a “nourishing field.”

而另一些人，像一个能量黑洞。
While others are like an energy black hole.

靠近她，你会觉得压抑、疲惫，充满负能量。
Being close to her, you’ll feel oppressed, exhausted, and filled with negative energy.

她们的世界里，充斥着对别人的嫉妒、对老师的抱怨、对规则的蔑视。她们会拉着你一起说同学的坏话，嘲笑那些努力学习的人，把拉帮结派、孤立他人当成乐趣和力量。
Their world is filled with jealousy towards others, complaints about teachers, and disdain for rules. They’ll drag you along to gossip about classmates, mock those who study hard, and take forming cliques and isolating others as fun and strength.

你一旦融入她们，就仿佛陷入了一个泥潭。你会被迫“同流合污”，不然你就是“不合群”。你会慢慢失去独立思考的能力，你的时间和精力，会在这些无休止的内耗和八卦中被消耗殆尽。
Once you get involved with them, it’s as if you sink into a quagmire. You’ll be forced to “go along with the crowd,” or else you’ll be labeled as “not fitting in.” You’ll gradually lose your ability to think independently, and your time and energy will be exhausted by endless internal conflicts and gossip.

这种关系，叫“消耗场”。
This kind of relationship is called a “consuming field.”

我在南方行走时，观察过一种很特别的树，叫“绞杀榕”。
While traveling in the south, I observed a very special type of tree called the “strangler fig.”

它会像藤蔓一样，温柔地缠绕上一棵大树。一开始，大树不以为意，甚至觉得多了个伴。
It wraps around a large tree like a vine, gently at first. Initially, the large tree pays no mind, even thinking it has gained a companion.

但慢慢地，绞杀榕会越缠越紧，把自己的根须深深扎进大树的躯干，汲取它的养分，遮蔽它的阳光。
But gradually, the strangler fig will wrap itself tighter, embedding its roots deep into the trunk of the large tree, absorbing its nutrients, and blocking its sunlight.

最后，曾经高耸入云的大树，被彻底掏空，窒息而死，而绞杀榕，则取而代之，长成了新的大树。
Finally, the once towering tree, having been completely hollowed out, suffocates and dies, while the strangler fig takes its place, growing into a new tree.

初中女生的小圈子、小团体，很多时候就像这“绞杀榕”和“大树”的关系。
The small circles and groups of junior high school girls are often like the relationship between the “strangler fig” and the “large tree.”

那些看似“很酷”、“很有势力”的小团体，往往就是最典型的“消耗场”。
Those seemingly “cool” and “powerful” groups are often the most typical “consuming arenas.”

它们用“姐妹情深”作为包装，内核却是靠着共同的“敌人”和“秘密”来维系。它们会不断制造drama（戏剧性事件），让你深陷其中，感觉自己是某个宏大故事的主角，但实际上，你只是在浪费生命。
They use “sisterly love” as a facade, but their core is sustained by shared “enemies” and “secrets.” They constantly create drama (dramatic events) to make you get deeply involved, making you feel like you’re the protagonist of a grand story, but in reality, you’re just wasting your life.

那么，如何分辨“滋养场”和“消耗场”？
So, how can you distinguish between a “nourishing field” and a “draining field”?

你要教给女儿一个最简单、最有效的方法，就是“身体觉知法”。
You need to teach your daughter the simplest and most effective method, which is the “body awareness method.”

告诉她，不要用耳朵去听那个人说了什么，要用你的整个身体去感受，和她待在一起，以及分开之后，你的身体是什么感觉。
Tell her not to listen with her ears to what that person says, but to use her entire body to feel, and to sense what it feels like to be with her and after she leaves.

是感觉轻松、开阔，好像卸下了重担，内心充满电？
Do you feel light and open, as if 卸下了重担，内心充满电？

还是感觉沉重、憋闷，好像被什么东西压着，情绪低落，只想躺平？
Or do you feel heavy and stifled, as if being pressed down by something, with low spirits, just wanting to lie flat?

身体是不会骗人的。
The body never lies.

身体的感受，就是能量交换最真实的账单。
The body’s sensations are the most authentic bill of energy exchange.

如果和一个人在一起，你总觉得累，那无论她看起来多有趣，多受欢迎，你都要开始警惕了。
If you always feel tired when you’re with someone, no matter how interesting or popular they seem, you should start being cautious.

这不是说要去憎恨谁，排斥谁。
This doesn’t mean to hate or exclude anyone.

而是要学会像保护自己的眼睛一样，去保护自己的能量场。
Instead, learn to protect your energy field as you would your own eyes.

告诉她，你有权利，温和而坚定地，离开那些让你感觉不好的人。
Tell them, you have the right, gently but firmly, to leave people who make you feel bad.

你可以说“我最近想多花点时间学习”，或者干脆就减少和她们的互动。
You can say “I recently want to spend more time studying,” or simply reduce interaction with them.

不需要解释，不需要愧疚。
No need for explanation, no need for guilt.

频率不同，不必强融。
Different frequencies, no need to force integration.

这就像收音机调频，你调你的FM98.7，她调她的AM103.5，你们都很好，只是，你们收听的不是同一个世界的节目。
It’s like tuning a radio. You tune to FM98.7, she tunes to AM103.5. You’re both fine, but, you’re listening to programs from different worlds.

一个女孩，如果能在14岁就懂得这个道理，她就掌握了人际关系的第一道护身符。
A girl who can understand this principle at the age of 14 has grasped the first protective charm of interpersonal relationships.

她会开始主动去寻找那些能“滋养”她的朋友，那些能让她成为更好自己的人。
She will begin to proactively seek out friends who can “nourish” her, those who can help her become a better version of herself.

她的人生，从一开始，就选择了一条向上走的路。
Her life will, from the very beginning, choose a path of upward growth.

这条路，可能初期会显得有些孤独，因为“消耗场”总是更热闹，更容易加入。
This path may seem somewhat lonely in the early stages, because the “consumption field” is always more lively and easier to join.

但你要告诉她，所有高质量的成长，都必然伴随着一段高质量的独处。
But you need to tell her that all high-quality growth is inevitably accompanied by a period of high-quality solitude.

她需要用这段时间，去构建自己的内核，去修炼自己的第二条潜规则。
She needs to use this time to build her own core and to cultivate her second unspoken rule.

第二条潜规则：你的价值，由你定义，而非他人标价。 你要告诉女儿，进入初中，她会立刻被卷入一个巨大的“价值评估系统”。
The second unspoken rule: Your value is defined by you, not by others who price it. You need to tell your daughter that entering junior high will immediately plunge her into a massive “value assessment system.”

这个系统，会从四面八方给她贴上各种“价签”。
This system will label her with various “price tags” from all directions.

考试分数，是学校给她贴的价签。
The exam scores are the price tags stuck by the school on her.

老师的评价，是权威给她贴的价签。
The teacher’s evaluation is the price tag stuck by authority on her.

同学的欢迎程度，是社交圈给她贴的价签。
The level of welcome from classmates is the price tag stuck by the social circle on her.

甚至，有多少男生关注她，喜欢她，也成了一种隐秘的价签。
Even, how many boys pay attention to her, like her, has also become a secret price tag.

这个阶段的女孩，内心是极度不确定的，她迫切地需要通过这些外部的“价签”，来确认“我是谁”、“我好不好”。
Girls at this stage are extremely uncertain internally, and they desperately need to confirm “Who am I,” “Am I good enough” through these external “price tags.”

这就导致了一个巨大的风险：她会把自己的价值，完全建立在这些外部评价之上。
This leads to a huge risk: She will completely base her own value on these external evaluations.

考了第一，她觉得自己是女王；掉了几名，她就感觉天塌地陷。
Ranked first in the exam, she feels like a queen; dropped a few places, she feels like the sky is falling.

被“酷女孩”团体接纳，她感觉自己光芒万丈；被孤立，她就觉得自己一无是处。
Accepted by the “cool girl” group, she feels like she’s shining brightly; isolated, she feels like she’s good for nothing.

有男生给她写情书，她会觉得自己很有魅力；没人关注，她就觉得自己是丑小鸭。
A boy writes her a love letter, and she feels she is very charming; if no one pays attention, she feels she is a Ugly Duckling.

这种建立在外部评价上的自我价值，就像沙滩上盖的城堡，看起来很美，但一个浪打过来，就瞬间崩塌。
This self-worth built on external evaluation is like a castle built on the sand—it looks beautiful, but it collapses instantly with a single wave.

这，是无数女孩成年后所有痛苦、不自信、没有安全感的总根源。
This is the root cause of all the pain, lack of confidence, and insecurity that countless girls experience after growing up.

她们终其一生，都在拼命向外界索取认可，来填补内心那个叫“自我价值”的黑洞。
They spend their entire lives desperately seeking external validation to fill the black hole called “self-worth” within them.

所以，你必须，必须，必须从根源上，帮她建立一个“内在的价值锚点”。
So, you must, must, must establish an “inner value anchor” for her from the root.

你要告诉她一个比喻：
You need to tell her a metaphor:

她，就像一块纯金。
She, like a piece of pure gold.

黄金的价值，是由它的密度、它的化学性质决定的。它就是黄金，这是它的本质。
The value of gold is determined by its density, its chemical properties. It is gold, that is its essence.

无论把它放在国王的皇冠上，还是把它丢在肮脏的泥土里，它的内在价值，丝毫不会改变。
No matter whether it is placed on the king’s crown or thrown into dirty soil, its intrinsic value will not change in the slightest.

皇冠，只是给了它一个“高价”的标签；泥土，只是暂时遮蔽了它的光芒。
The crown merely gives it a “high price” label; the soil merely temporarily obscures its brilliance.

但它，依然是黄金。
But it remains gold.

那些外部的评价，无论是成绩、别人的喜欢、还是外貌，都只是那顶“皇冠”或者那滩“泥土”。
Those external evaluations, whether grades, others’ liking, or appearance, are merely the “crown” or the “soil” of it.

它们可以影响你一时的“价格”，但绝对不能定义你永恒的“价值”。
They can affect your “price” in the moment, but they can never define your eternal “value.”

那么，如何帮她锻造这个“内在的价值锚-点”？
So, how can we help her forge this “inner value anchor-point”?

答案是：帮她找到一件“无用之事”。
The answer is: help her find something “useless.”

什么叫“无用之事”？
What is a “useless thing”?

就是这件事，不为了加分，不为了考级，不为了在别人面前炫耀。
It is precisely this matter, not for points, not for exams, not for showing off in front of others.

做这件事的唯一目的，就是她发自内心地、纯粹地喜欢。
The sole purpose of doing this is that she genuinely and purely loves it.

在做这件事的时候，她能进入一种“心流”状态，忘记时间，忘记自我，获得一种极致的专注和喜悦。
When doing this, she can enter a “flow” state, forgetting time and herself, gaining an ultimate focus and joy.

它可以是画画，哪怕画得不好，但她享受色彩在指尖流淌的感觉。
It can be painting, even if it’s not well done, but she enjoys the feeling of colors flowing through her fingertips.

它可以是写故事，哪怕没人看，但她享受在文字世界里创造一个宇宙的快感。
It can be writing stories, even if no one reads them, but she enjoys the thrill of creating a universe in the world of words.

它可以是研究昆虫，哪怕很奇怪，但她享受观察生命奥秘的乐趣。
It can be studying insects, even if they are strange, but she enjoys the joy of observing the mysteries of life.

它可以是跳一段街舞，哪怕动作不标准，但她享受身体随着节奏律动带来的自由。
It can be dancing a street dance routine, even if the moves are not standard, but she enjoys the freedom that comes from her body moving to the rhythm.

这件事，就是她为自己打造的“价值圣殿”。
This is the “Value Sanctuary” she built for herself.

在这个圣殿里，没有评判，没有比较，只有她和她的热爱。
In this sanctuary, there is no judgment, no comparison, only she and her passion.

每一次她投入到这件事里，都是在进行一次“自我价值”的确认。
Every time she immerses herself in this endeavor, it is an affirmation of her “self-worth.”

她会从“创造”本身，而不是从“结果”中，获得源源不断的内在力量。
She draws an endless inner strength from the act of “creation” itself, rather than from the “results.”

这个过程，就像在为她的精神世界，打造一根“定海神针”。
This process is like forging a “sea-stabilizing anchor” for her spiritual world.

当外部世界的“评价海啸”袭来时，当她考试失利、被人误解、感觉孤独时，她可以随时回到自己的这个圣殿里。
When the “tsunami of external judgment” strikes, when she fails an exam, is misunderstood, or feels lonely, she can always retreat to her own sanctuary.

她会触摸到那根冰冷而坚实的定海神针，然后对自己说：
She will touch that cold yet solid “sea-stabilizing needle,” then tell herself:

“没关系，就算我在他们眼里不够好，但我还是那个能创造出美妙世界的我。我的价值，在这里，在我手里，谁也夺不走。”
“It’s okay, even if I’m not good enough in their eyes, I’m still the one who can create a wonderful world. My worth, here, in my hands, no one can take away.”

一个拥有“内在价值锚点”的女孩，是很难“学坏”的。
A girl with an “inner value anchor” finds it hard to “go bad.”

因为她不需要通过早恋，去证明自己被爱。
Because she doesn’t need to prove her love through early romance.

她不需要通过混圈子，去获得归属感。
She doesn’t need to gain a sense of belonging by mingling in circles.

她不需要通过叛逆，去彰显自己的存在。
She doesn’t need to assert her existence through rebellion.

她的内心，自成一个丰盛的宇宙。
Her inner world is a rich and abundant universe.

她站在此山望那山，看到的不再是自卑和羡慕，而是“哦，那里的风景也不错，但我更爱我自己的花园”。
She stands on this mountain gazing at that mountain, no longer seeing inferiority and envy, but rather, “Oh, the scenery there is also quite nice, but I love my own garden more.”

她会活得非常舒展，非常笃定。
She will live very freely and with great certainty.

这种由内而外的笃定，会生发出一种独特的气质。
This certainty from within will give rise to a unique demeanor.

这种气质，远比短暂的漂亮、时髦的穿着，更具吸引力。
This demeanor is far more attractive than fleeting beauty or trendy clothing.

它能帮她抵御外界的侵蚀，也能帮她更好地去审视她所接触到的一切信息。
It can help her resist external erosion and also help her better examine all the information she comes into contact with.

这就引出了第三条潜规则。
This leads to the third implicit rule.

第三条潜规则：你的心智，是你所有信息的总和。 你要告诉女儿，从她拥有第一部智能手机开始，她就进入了一个信息爆炸的时代。
The third implicit rule: Your mind is the sum of all your information. You need to tell your daughter that since she got her first smartphone, she has entered an era of information explosion.

她每天睁开眼，就要被无数的信息洪流所包裹。
Every day when she wakes up, she will be surrounded by an endless stream of information.

同学群里的八卦闲聊。
Gossip and idle chatter in the class group chat.

社交媒体上光鲜亮丽的网红生活。
The glamorous life of influencers on social media.

偶像剧里被无限美化的“霸道总裁式”爱情。
The “tyrannical CEO-style” love that is infinitely glorified in romantic dramas.

短视频里各种真假难辨的“人生道理”和“变美技巧”。
Various “life principles” and “beauty tips” that are hard to distinguish between true and false in short videos.

这些信息，就像空气和水一样，无孔不入地渗透进她的思想。
This information, like air and water, seeps into her thoughts without any barrier.

但很少有人告诉她：
But few people tell her:

你看似在“消费”信息，其实你也在被信息“塑造”。
It seems you are “consuming” information, but in fact, you are also being “shaped” by information.

你看什么，你听什么，你相信什么，最终，你就会成为什么。
What you see, what you hear, what you believe, ultimately, you will become.

你的心智，就是你过去所有摄入信息的总和。
Your mind is the sum of all the information you have consumed in the past.

我在很多地方都打过一个比方，你的大脑，就像一个厨房。
I’ve made a comparison in many places: your brain is like a kitchen.

你每天喂给它什么“食材”，它就会为你烹饪出什么样的“精神大餐”。
Whatever “ingredients” you feed it every day, it will cook you a kind of “spiritual feast” accordingly.

如果你每天喂给它的，都是些垃圾食品——比如，充斥着攀比、嫉妒、焦虑的网红信息；颠倒黑白、扭曲价值观的劣质内容；让人沉溺于幻想、无法自拔的肥皂剧……
If you feed it garbage food every day—such as, influencer information full of comparison, jealousy, and anxiety; low-quality content that twists black and white and distorts values; soaps operas that make people indulge in fantasies and cannot extricate themselves from them…

那么，你的大脑厨房，就会为你烹饪出一道道“精神垃圾”。
Then, your brain kitchen will cook up a series of “spiritual garbage” for you.

吃了这些精神垃圾，你的心智就会变得“营养不良”。
Eating this spiritual garbage will make your mind “malnourished.”

你会变得焦虑，因为你总拿自己的普通生活和网红的精修图作对比。
You will become anxious because you constantly compare your ordinary life to the heavily edited photos of influencers.

你会变得虚荣，因为你相信了那些“包治百病”的消费主义陷阱。
You will become vain because you believe in the consumerist traps that promise to “cure all ills.”

你会对爱情产生不切实际的幻想，认为现实中的男孩都应该像剧里的男主角一样完美，从而在真实的关系中备受挫折。
You will develop unrealistic fantasies about love, believing that all boys in real life should be perfect like the male protagonists in dramas, thus suffering great frustration in real relationships.

你会变得思维懒惰，习惯于接受那些被嚼碎了的、15秒的结论，而丧失了深度思考和阅读长文的能力。
You will become mentally lazy, accustomed to accepting bite-sized, 15-second conclusions, and lose the ability to think deeply and read long texts.

这就是一种精神上的“学坏”。它比抽烟喝酒更隐蔽，但危害却更为深远，因为它从根子上，污染了一个人的认知系统。
This is a kind of “corruption” in the spirit. It is more concealed than smoking or drinking, but its harm is far more profound because it fundamentally pollutes a person’s cognitive system.

反之，如果你有意识地，为自己的大脑挑选“有机食材”呢？
On the other hand, if you consciously choose “organic ingredients” for your brain?

比如，去看一部揭示自然奥秘的纪录片。
For example, watch a documentary that reveals the mysteries of nature.

去读一本真正优秀的文学作品，感受文字之美和人性的深邃。
Read a truly outstanding literary work and feel the beauty of words and the depth of humanity.

去关注一些不同领域的、真正有智慧的博主，看他们是如何思考问题的。
Follow some bloggers who are truly wise in different fields and see how they think about problems.

去学习一门新的技能，哪怕只是用APP学一门外语的几个单词。
Learn a new skill, even if it’s just learning a few words of a foreign language through an app.

这些，就是你心智的“蛋白质”、“维生素”和“膳食纤维”。
These are the “proteins,” “vitamins,” and “dietary fibers” for your mind.

它们会帮助你构建一个健康、强壮的“心智免疫系统”。
They will help you build a healthy, strong “mental immune system.”

这个系统，能让你在面对信息洪流时，自动开启“过滤”和“杀毒”功能。
This system will enable you to automatically activate the “filtering” and “antivirus” functions when facing a flood of information.

看到一张完美的网红照片，你的第一反应不是“她好美，我好差”，而是会想：“嗯，这个光线打得不错，后期修图师傅的技术也很好。”
When you see a perfect influencer photo, your first reaction isn’t “She’s so beautiful, I’m so bad,” but rather, “Hmm, the lighting is well-done, and the post-processing technique is also very good.”

看到一个煽动性的标题，你不会立刻就信，而是会去查证信息的来源，看看有没有不同的说法。
When you see a sensational headline, you won’t believe it immediately but will go to check the source of the information to see if there are different accounts.

看到一种被吹得天花乱坠的消费品，你会冷静下来问自己：“这是我真的需要，还是他们想让我觉得我需要？”
When you see a consumer product that is hyped to the heavens, you will calm down and ask yourself, “Do I really need this, or do they want me to think I need it?”

这就是“信息时代的生存智慧”。
This is the “survival wisdom of the information age.”

你要如何教给女儿这种智慧？
How will you teach your daughter this wisdom?

不是简单粗暴地没收她的手机。
Not simply and roughly taking away her phone.

而是要成为她的“信息食谱营养师”。
But rather becoming her “information recipe nutritionist.”

你可以和她一起，看一部高分电影，然后讨论里面的情节和人物。你不需要“教育”她，你只需要提出你的看法，引导她思考。
You can watch a high-rated movie with her and then discuss the plot and characters. You don’t need to “educate” her; you just need to share your opinions and guide her to think.

比如，看完一部爱情片，你可以问她：“你觉得男主角的爱，是真的爱吗？还是一种控制？如果他是你同学，你会喜欢他吗？”
For example, after watching a romantic movie, you can ask her: “Do you think the male protagonist’s love is genuine love, or is it a form of control? If he were your classmate, would you like him?”

你可以和她分享一篇你看到的、觉得很有趣的深度文章，哪怕她一开始不感兴趣。
You can share with her an in-depth article you found interesting, even if she is initially uninterested.

你可以带她去博物馆，去科技馆，去自然保护区，让她亲身去体验那些来自真实世界的、高质量的信息。
You can take her to a museum, a science center, or a nature reserve, letting her experience firsthand high-quality information from the real world.

你要做的，是帮她建立一个“信息品味”的坐标系。
What you need to do is help her establish a coordinate system for “information taste.”

当她品尝过真正美味、营养的“精神大餐”后，她自己就会对那些“精神垃圾食品”，慢慢失去兴趣。
Once she has sampled truly delicious and nutritious “精神大餐” (spiritual feasts), she will gradually lose interest in those “精神垃圾食品” (spiritual junk food).

她会明白，她的时间，她的注意力，是她最宝贵的资产，不能轻易地被那些廉价的、低质的信息所收割。
She will understand that her time, her attention, is her most valuable asset and cannot be easily harvested by those cheap, low-quality information.

一个懂得主动选择、主动过滤信息的女孩，她的认知水平，会远远超越同龄人。
A girl who knows how to actively choose and filter information will have a cognitive level far beyond her peers.

她能拨开世界的迷雾，看到更本质的逻辑。
She can dispel the fog of the world and see more fundamental logic.

这种能力，能让她在纷繁复杂的社交游戏中，始终保持清醒。
This ability will allow her to remain clear-headed in the complex social game.

这就到了最后一条，也是最“高阶”的一条潜规则。
This is the last one, and also the most “advanced” unspoken rule.

第四条潜规则：看懂社交游戏的规则，才能不被游戏玩弄。 你要告诉女儿，学校，尤其是初中，就是一个微缩的“社会丛林”。
The fourth unspoken rule: Understand the rules of social games to avoid being played by them. You need to tell your daughter that school, especially middle school, is a miniature “social jungle.”

这里面有权力斗争，有结盟，有背叛，有舆论战，有看不见的阶级。
There is power struggle, there are alliances, there is betrayal, there are public opinion wars, and there are invisible classes.

这一切，对一个心智尚未成熟的女孩来说，是极其残酷和令人恐惧的。
All of this is extremely cruel and frightening for a girl who has not yet matured mentally.

很多女孩之所以会“学坏”，或者变得抑郁、自闭，不是因为她本性不好，而是因为她看不懂这场游戏的规则，成了游戏里被随意摆布的“棋子”，或者被无情碾压的“炮灰”。
Many girls end up “going astray,” or becoming depressed and withdrawn, not because they are inherently bad, but because they don’t understand the rules of this game and become “pawns” manipulated at will, or “casualties” crushed mercilessly.

她被小团体孤立了，她不知道为什么，只会觉得“是我不好，没人喜欢我”。
She is isolated by a small group, and she doesn’t know why, only feeling “It’s my fault, nobody likes me.”

她被好朋友背叛了，她想不通，只会觉得“人心险恶，我再也不相信任何人了”。
She is betrayed by a close friend, and she can’t understand why, only feeling “People are treacherous, I will never trust anyone again.”

她无意中得罪了“大姐大”，被造谣中伤，她百口莫辩，只会感到无助和绝望。
She inadvertently offends the “big sister,” is slandered and maligned, and she is unable to defend herself, only feeling helpless and desperate.

这些，都是因为她把这场游戏，当成了她人生的全部。她身在其中，无法抽离。
All of this is because she treats this game as her entire life. She is immersed in it and cannot extricate herself.

所以，你要教给她最关键的一步：
So, you need to teach her the most crucial step:

跳出棋盘看棋局。
Step out of the board to see the game.

你要告诉她，把学校里的人际关系，想象成一场大型的在线角色扮演游戏（RPG）。
You need to tell her to imagine the interpersonal relationships at school as a large online role-playing game (RPG).

她自己，是这场游戏的主角。
She herself is the protagonist of this game.

班级里的同学，都是NPC（非玩家角色）或者其他玩家。
Her classmates are all NPCs (non-player characters) or other players.

每个人都有自己的“角色设定”和“行为模式”。
Everyone has their own “character settings” and “behavior patterns.”

那个“大姐大”，她的核心需求是“权力和关注”。她拉帮结派，是为了满足自己的掌控欲。她的强大，来自于追随者的数量。一旦没人追随，她什么都不是。
That “big sister,” her core needs are “power and attention.” She forms cliques to satisfy her desire for control. Her strength comes from the number of followers she has. Once she has no followers, she is nothing.

那个“八卦女王”，她的核心需求是“信息和存在感”。她通过传播秘密来交换信任，彰显自己的重要性。一旦她的信息不再灵通，她就会被边缘化。
That “gossip queen,” her core needs are “information and presence.” She exchanges trust by spreading secrets, highlighting her own importance. Once her information is no longer current, she will be marginalized.

那个“绿茶女孩”，她的核心需求是“所有人的喜爱和资源”。她通过扮演无辜和弱小，来博取同情和优待。
That “green tea girl,” her core needs are “everyone’s affection and resources.” She gains sympathy and preferential treatment by playing the role of an innocent and weakling.

看懂了这些，女儿就能从一个“受害者”的视角，切换到一个“游戏分析师”的视角。
Understanding these points, the daughter can switch from a “victim” perspective to a “game analyst” perspective.

当她再遇到问题时，她脑子里想的，就不再是“为什么受伤的总是我？”，而是：
When she encounters problems again, what will be in her mind is no longer “Why am I always the one getting hurt?” but rather:

“OK，游戏出现新状况了。这个玩家为什么要这么做？她的目的是什么？这个行为，触动了游戏里的哪个规则？我有哪些应对策略？”
“OK, a new situation has emerged in the game. Why is this player doing this? What is their objective? Which game rules has this action triggered? What strategies can I employ in response?”

策略A：正面硬刚。这需要我有足够强大的实力和后援。目前我的实力如何？胜算多大？
Strategy A: Confrontation. This requires me to have sufficient strength and support. How is my current strength? What are the odds of winning?

策略B：无视。这需要我有极强的心理素质，能承受短期的舆论压力。我的“内在价值锚点”够不够稳？
Strategy B: Ignoring. This requires me to have strong mental resilience to withstand short-term public opinion pressure. Is my “internal value anchor” stable enough?

策略C：迂回。去链接其他的玩家，建立新的联盟，改变力量对比。我身边有哪些可以结盟的“滋养场”朋友？
Strategy C: Indirect Approach. Connect with other players, form new alliances, and alter the balance of power. Who around me are potential allies to form alliances with?

你看，一旦切换到这个视角，恐惧和委屈就消失了，取而代之的，是冷静的分析和策略性的思考。
Look, once you switch to this perspective, fear and grievances disappear, replaced by calm analysis and strategic thinking.

她不再是一个被动的承受者，而是一个主动的玩家。
She is no longer a passive recipient, but an active player.

这并不是教她变得工于心计，去算计别人。
This is not about teaching her to be cunning or to scheme against others.

恰恰相反，这是教她拥有看破“心计”的智慧，从而不被“心计”所伤。
On the contrary, this teaches her the wisdom to see through “cunning,” so she is not harmed by “cunning.”

这是一种“慈悲的犀利”。
This is a “kindness that is sharp.”

懂规则，是为了更好地守护自己，守护善良。
Understanding the rules is to better protect oneself and protect kindness.

一个能用“游戏视角”来看待身边不如意之事的女孩，她的格局，从一开始就超越了那些鸡毛蒜皮的恩怨。
A girl who can view the misfortunes around her from a “game perspective,” her perspective from the beginning has surpassed those trivial grievances.

她不会因为一场“游戏”的胜负，而否定自己人生的价值。
She will not deny the value of her life because of the win or loss of a “game.”

她会把所有的经历，都当成是“打怪升级”攒经验。
She will treat all her experiences as “gaining experience by defeating monsters and leveling up.”

这种心态，会让她在未来的职场、社会中，都拥有强大的适应能力和解决问题的能力。
This mindset will enable her to possess strong adaptability and problem-solving skills in her future career and society.

她会成为一个真正意义上的“大女主”。
She will become a true “strong female lead.”

这四条潜规则，像四个彼此关联的齿轮，环环相扣。
These four unspoken rules are like four interconnected gears, interlocking with each other.

懂得“能量交换”，她会选择好的同伴（格心）。
Understands “energy exchange,” she will choose good companions (heart’s anchor).

懂得“价值锚定”，她会建立稳固的内核（格身）。
Understands “value anchoring,” she will establish a solid core (body’s anchor).

懂得“信息食谱”，她会擦亮看世界的眼睛（格局）。
Understands “information recipe,” she will polish her eyes for seeing the world (worldview’s anchor).

懂得“游戏规则”，她会游刃有余地处理关系（格业）。
Understands “game rules,” she will handle relationships with ease (career’s anchor).

这四者合一，就构成了一个女孩强大的“精神免疫系统”。
The integration of these four elements constitutes a girl’s powerful “spiritual immune system.”

它能帮助她安然度过青春期这个最湍急、最凶险的渡口。
It helps her navigate the most turbulent and perilous transition period of adolescence with ease.

当然，这四条潜规则，也仅仅是冰山一角。
Of course, these four implicit rules are merely the tip of the iceberg.

它们背后，指向的是一套更庞大、更底层的，关于人性、规律和世界的智慧体系。
Behind them lies a more extensive and fundamental wisdom system concerning human nature, laws, and the world.

它不仅仅适用于一个14岁的女孩，它适用于我们每一个人。
It’s not just suitable for a 14-year-old girl, it’s suitable for every one of us.

过去几年，我一直在做一件事，就是把我从无数的经典中、从行走华夏的见闻中、从与上千位各行各业精英的深度交流中，提炼、萃取出的100个这样的底层思维模型，打磨成了一套《人生格物学》专栏。
Over the past few years, I’ve been doing one thing: refining and extracting 100 such fundamental thinking models from countless classics, from my experiences walking through China, and from in-depth exchanges with thousands of elites in various fields, into a column called “The Study of Human Life.”

这100个思维模型，就像100个可以即插即用的“思想APP”，覆盖了从个人成长（格身）、心智模式（格心）、人际博弈（格局）、到事业财富（格业）、乃至终极智慧（格道）的方方面面。
These 100 thinking models are like 100 ready-to-use “thought apps,” covering everything from personal growth (self-cultivation), mindset (cultivating the heart), interpersonal dynamics (broad perspective), to career and wealth (cultivating the career), and even ultimate wisdom (cultivating the Dao).

我给一个女孩这4条潜规则，就像给了她4个强大的应用软件。
Giving a girl these four implicit rules is like giving her four powerful application software.

而这100个思维模型，是想为她，也为你，彻底重装一套全新的“人生操作系统”。
And these 100 thinking models are to completely reinstall a brand new “life operating system” for her, and for you.

有了这套系统，你将不再需要零散的“术”，因为你已经掌握了生出万千好“术”的那个“道”。
With this system, you will no longer need scattered “techniques,” because you have already grasped the “path” that gives birth to countless good “techniques.”

你将拥有洞察万物本质的能力，无论是教育子女、经营事业，还是处理亲密关系，你都能一眼看透其底层逻辑，做出最接近最优解的决策。
You will possess the ability to see through the essence of everything, whether it’s educating children, running a business, or handling close relationships. You will be able to see through their underlying logic at a glance and make decisions that are closest to the optimal solution.

这100个思维模型，就是我为你和她准备的，通往清醒人生的完整地图。在主页简介最后一行，我为你留下了通往《人生格物学》的入口，期待与你，以及每一个渴望觉醒的灵魂，一同格物致知。
These 100 thinking models are the complete map I have prepared for you and her to the path of a clear life. In the last line of the homepage introduction, I have left an entry to “The Study of Life,” looking forward to walking with you and every soul that yearns for awakening.

最后，我想说，教育女儿，最高级的境界，不是把她养成一朵需要被时时呵护的娇嫩玫瑰。
Finally, I want to say that the highest level of educating a daughter is not to raise her to be a delicate rose that needs constant care.

而是把她培养成一棵扎根于大地，能自己抵御风雨、自己向阳而生的白桦树。
But to cultivate her to be a birch tree rooted in the earth, able to withstand wind and rain and grow towards the sun on her own.

她有自己的根系，去汲取养分；她有自己的年轮，去记录成长。
She has her own roots to absorb nutrients; she has her own rings to record her growth.

风来，她会摇曳，但不会折断。
When the wind comes, she will sway, but she will not break.

雨来，她会洗净尘埃，更显青翠。
When it rains, she will wash away the dust, revealing her verdant hue.

她矗立在那里，本身，就是一道风景。
She stands there, in herself, is already a scenic view.

声明：本文来自《一凡日记》专栏
Statement: This article is from the column “Yifan Diary”

文章时常被删屏蔽，如有收获，可在评论区获取本篇《一凡日记》5000字PDF版
The article is often deleted or censored. If you gain something, you can get the 5000-word PDF version of this “Yifan Diary” in the comments.

我是一凡，长青盟创始人、源头日记合伙人
I am Wei Fan, founder of the Evergreen Alliance and partner of Source Diary.

长青盟，是专为成长型女性打造的终身成长社群。
Evergreen Alliance is a lifelong growth community created specifically for growth-oriented women.

我们不止是一个社群，更是一个深度融合了「私域电商」x「知识付费」x「自媒体赋能」的完整成长生态。
It is not just a community, but a complete growth ecosystem that deeply integrates ‘private domain e-commerce’ x ‘knowledge payment’ x ‘influencer empowerment’.

我们陪伴你，以品质健康生活为基石，以精神富足为内核，最终成长为能够持续盈利的超级个体。
We accompany you, with quality and healthy living as the foundation, spiritual fulfillment as the core, ultimately growing into a super individual capable of sustainable profitability.

所有王朝的统治阶层都是聪明人，非常懂得实事求是，但为什么没有一个王朝跳得出王朝周期律？ 如果非要用一句话把这层窗户纸捅破，我认为是：任何为了长治久安而设计的制度，最终都会因为其成功而异化为杀死政权本身的凶手。
All ruling classes of dynasties are intelligent people who understand the importance of being pragmatic, but why can no dynasty break free from the dynastic cycle? If I had to pierce through this veil with one sentence, I would say: Any system designed for long-term stability and peace will ultimately, due to its success, become the 凶手 that kills the regime itself.

我们许多人在读历史会产生一种错觉，觉得每个王朝的末期是一群坏人在干坏事才导致国家衰弱的。其实不是，大部分时候一个帝国的衰亡，是一群在这个系统里完全理性的好人，按照一套已经僵死的好规矩，合力把这艘船开进了冰山。
Many of us, when reading history, may develop a misconception that the decline of each dynasty is caused by a group of bad people doing bad things, leading to the country’s weakening. In reality, it’s not like that. Most of the time, the decline of an empire is the result of a group of completely rational people within the system, following a set of rigidly dead rules, working together to steer the ship into an iceberg.

你想想看，一个新政权刚建立的时候，不论是古代的大汉大唐，还是现代国家，它的第一要务是什么？是消除不确定性。
Just think about it, when a new regime is just established, whether it’s the ancient Han and Tang dynasties or modern countries, what is its top priority? It is to eliminate uncertainty.

开国的那帮人很清楚，人是不可靠的。皇帝会生出傻儿子，屠龙的英雄最终会变成恶龙。所以他们必须把个人的权力关进制度的笼子里，他们制定法律、设立机构、确立惯例，本质上就是在给统治系统打补丁。
The people who establish the country are very clear that humans are unreliable. Emperors can have foolish sons, and the heroes who slay dragons can eventually become dragons themselves. Therefore, they must lock individual power into the cage of the system. They create laws, set up institutions, and establish conventions, essentially patching up the ruling system.

起初，这些补丁极其有效。它们把权力的运行从绝对的人治的不稳定中拽了出来，变成可预测的流水线。这就是各个王朝早期的盛世，机器轰鸣，运转如仪。
Initially, these patches were extremely effective. They pulled the operation of power out of the instability of absolute human rule and transformed it into a predictable assembly line. This was the golden age of the early dynasties, with machines roaring and functioning as intended.

但悲剧的种子恰恰就在此刻埋下了。
But the seeds of tragedy were sown precisely at this moment.

你要知道，任何一条法律、任何一个机构，一旦被创造出来，它就拥有了自我保存的本能。它就不再是一个单纯的工具，而变成了一个活的有机体。
You must understand that once any law or institution is created, it acquires an instinct for self-preservation. It is no longer just a simple tool but becomes a living organism.

设立了漕运总督，这世上就多了一个叫漕帮的利益集团；设立了科举，这世上就多了一个把儒家经典当饭碗的士绅阶层；设立了复杂的环保法和合规审查，这世上就多了一个年薪百万的律师和咨询顾问群体。
When the Commissioner of Water Transport was established, a new interest group called the Water Transport Gang emerged in the world; when the imperial examination system was established, a gentry class emerged in the world that treated the Confucian classics as their livelihood; when complex environmental protection laws and compliance reviews were established, a group of lawyers and consultants earning millions annually emerged in the world.

时间越久，这些补丁就堆积得越厚。
The longer the time passes, the thicker these patches accumulate.

到了王朝中后期，你再看这个国家，它已经不是一个敏捷的战士，而是一个穿了几百层盔甲的胖子。每一层盔甲（制度、法律、传统、惯例），最初都是为了保护它，但现在却让它寸步难行。
By the middle and later stages of the dynasty, if you look at this country again, it is no longer an agile warrior but a fat man wearing hundreds of layers of armor. Each layer of armor (systems, laws, traditions, conventions) was initially designed to protect it, but now it makes it impossible for it to move even a step.

这时候，最致命的合法性悖论出现了。
At this point, the most fatal paradox of legitimacy appears.

古代的皇帝也好，现代的改革者也罢，当他们发现国家遇到危机（比如财政破产、外敌入侵）想要掉头时，会发现根本动不了。
Whether it is the ancient emperors or modern reformers, when they discover that the country is in crisis (such as financial bankruptcy, foreign invasion) and want to turn around, they will find that they cannot move at all.

崇祯皇帝面对财政枯竭想从江南富商身上收税，满朝的文官不会直接说我不给，他们会引经据典，搬出太祖的不与民争利，搬出《皇明祖训》的祖宗之法，告诉你这是与民争利，是违背祖制。你甚至没法反驳，因为从法理上讲，他们是对的。
Emperor Chongzhen faced with exhausted finances wanted to tax the wealthy merchants in Jiangnan, but the literati across the court would not directly say “I won’t give.” Instead, they would cite historical precedents, invoke the principle of “not competing with the people for profit” from the founding Emperor Taizu, and bring up the “Ancestral Laws” from the “Imperial Ming Ancestral Instructions,” telling you that this was competing with the people for profit and was in violation of ancestral traditions. You couldn’t even refute them because, legally speaking, they were right.

路易十六想让法国贵族交税，贵族们搬出的是几百年前的封建契约和高等法院的判例，理直气壮地告诉你，免税是他们的“自由”和“权利”。
King Louis XVI wanted the French nobility to pay taxes, and the nobles cited feudal contracts from centuries ago and court rulings from the High Court, telling you with great justification that tax exemption was their “freedom” and “right.”

亡国之君往往不是死于无法无天，而是死于作茧自缚。那些曾经维持了帝国稳定的法律和惯例，经过两百年的堆积，变成了一张密不透风的网。每一个既得利益者都趴在这张网上，合法地、合规地、甚至合乎道德地吸食帝国的血液。
The last rulers of a nation are often not killed by lawlessness but by their own entrapment. Those laws and customs that once maintained the stability of the empire, after two hundred years of accumulation, had become an impenetrable web. Every vested interest lies on this web, legally, compliantly, and even morally, draining the empire’s lifeblood.

这就是为什么我特别不认同有些人觉得在王朝中后期努力清除贪官就能救国这种天真的想法。
This is why I particularly disagree with some people’s naive belief that efforts to eliminate corrupt officials in the middle and later stages of a dynasty can save the nation.

清除贪官只能解决非法的贪婪，解决不了合法的僵化。
Clearing corrupt officials only addresses illegal greed, not the legitimate rigidity.

真正拖垮帝国的，往往不是那些把手伸进国库偷钱的贪官（这种人杀了就行），而是那些严格按照流程办事、利用复杂的法律程序让国家基建停摆的官僚，是那些拿着天价咨询费，论证为什么改革不可行的专家，是那些将家族利益通过联姻和学阀固化为国家传统的精英。
What often brings down empires isn’t the officials who steal from the treasury (such people can simply be killed), but the bureaucrats who follow procedures strictly, using complex legal processes to halt national infrastructure; the experts who charge exorbitant consulting fees to argue why reforms are unfeasible; and the elite who solidify family interests through marriage and academic influence into national traditions.

这就是制度性硬化。
This is systemic hardening.

在这种状态下，全社会的资源不再流向生产和创新，而是大量地消耗在内部交易成本上。 所以你会发现，王朝越到后期，办事越难。在初唐，一道敕令就能调动千军万马；到了晚明，调动一支部队需要经过兵部、户部、内阁、司礼监的层层扯皮，公文旅行几个月，黄花菜都凉了。
In this state, the resources of the entire society no longer flow into production and innovation, but are instead 大量 consumed in internal transaction costs. So you’ll find that the later a dynasty gets, the harder it becomes to get things done. In the early Tang, an edict could mobilize thousands of troops; by the late Ming, moving a single unit required 层层 bureaucratic wrangling through the Ministry of War, the Ministry of Revenue, the Grand Secretariat, and the Imperial Secretariat, with paperwork taking months—by then, the chances were already gone.

这像极了现代的美国和欧洲。修一条铁路，论证十年，听证会开了几百场，律师费花了几个亿，最后告诉你“由于环保法第几百条规定，这只稀有青蛙不能搬家”，所以铁路不修了。
This is almost identical to modern America and Europe. Building a railway takes a decade of debate, hundreds of hearings, and billions in legal fees, only to be told in the end, “Due to the hundreds of provisions of the environmental protection law, this rare frog cannot be moved,” so the railway is not built.

这就是文明的老化，它表现为一种极度的精致和极度的无能并存。
This is the aging of civilization, characterized by an extreme degree of refinement and extreme incompetence coexisting.

一方面，社会的礼仪、法律、道德规范复杂到了繁琐的地步，精英们在只有针尖大的问题上辩论得头头是道（比如明代的大礼议或现代西方的政治正确）；另一方面，面对真正的生存危机，比如蛮族的铁骑、俄国的威胁、产业的空心化，这个庞大的机器却做不出任何有效的物理反应。
On the one hand, social etiquette, laws, and moral norms have become so complex and cumbersome that elites debate over hair-splitting issues with great expertise (such as the Grand Rites Debate in the Ming Dynasty or modern Western political correctness); on the other hand, when faced with real survival crises, such as the cavalry of barbarians, the threat of Russia, or the hollowing out of industries, this vast machine fails to make any effective physical response.

如果一定要问解药是什么，理论上是有的。既然构成衰败的不是腐败，而是熵增，那就熵减，即设立一个专门废除法律的机构。
If one must ask what the cure is, theoretically, there is one. Since what constitutes decline is not corruption but entropy increase, then entropy must be reduced, which means establishing a dedicated institution for abolishing laws.

但现实极其骨感。
But the reality is extremely stark.

这就是目前马斯克在美国搞的政府效率部。然而在实践中，一个负责做熵减的部门，最后大概率会异化为熵增的一部分。真正的熵减不在于裁掉几个拿工资的职员，而在于砍掉那些阻碍运行的繁文缛节和利益集团的阻力。但目前看来，马斯克只做到了减少工资开销，关键的规则否决权的收回并没有真正触及到体制的痛处。
This is the Government Efficiency Department that Musk is currently running in the U.S. However, in practice, a department responsible for reducing entropy is likely to degenerate into part of the entropy increase. True entropy reduction does not lie in cutting a few paid staff, but in cutting away the cumbersome procedures and the resistance of interest groups that hinder operations. But it currently seems that Musk has only managed to reduce wage expenditures, and the recovery of the key rule veto power has not truly touched the pain points of the system.

还有一个方法，那就是日落条款。
There is another method, which is the sunset clause.

即：将所有的法律、议案、惯例都加上时间限制，时间到了就要重新讨论或自动废除。
That is: to impose time limits on all laws, bills, and conventions, and to require re-discussion or automatic abolition when the time is up.

美国开国元勋托马斯·杰斐逊曾是这个观点的狂热支持者。他说过：“地球属于活着的人的使用权。”他比我还激进，认为一个人死后，就不应该再对生者有任何控制权。同理，一代人死后，他们制定的法律、借下的债务、设立的宪法，也不应该继续束缚下一代人。
Founding Father of the United States Thomas Jefferson was once a fervent supporter of this view. He said, “The Earth belongs to the living, and they may use it as they please.” He was even more radical than I, believing that after a person’s death, they should no longer have any control over the living. Similarly, when one generation passes away, the laws they enacted, the debts they incurred, and the constitutions they established should not continue to bind the next generation.

他当初提出过一个著名的建议：“所有的宪法、法律、国债，都应该设置一个强制废除期，有效期最长只有19年。”
He once proposed a famous suggestion: “All constitutions, laws, and national debts should be set with a mandatory expiration period, with the longest term being only 19 years.”

但结果呢？这个提议被麦迪逊驳回了。理由很简单：即使统治上可能，就算真的实行了，这大概率也会变成依附于这条法案的利益集团的无限续杯。
But what happened? This proposal was rejected by Madison. The reason was simple: even if it were possible to govern under it, if it were actually implemented, it would most likely become an infinite refilling of interests for the groups that depend on this law.

王朝周期律本质上就是一场社会学意义上的熵增。我们建立制度是为了抵抗混乱，但最终，制度本身却变成了最大的混乱来源。人类文明几千年，无论西方还是东方，至今仍然没能彻底跳出这个圆圈，只是把祖宗之法换了个名字，叫程序正义。 用一句古话来说，那就是： “君以此兴，必以此亡。”
The cycle of dynasties is essentially a form of entropy in a sociological sense. We establish institutions to resist chaos, but ultimately, the institutions themselves become the greatest source of chaos. For thousands of years of human civilization, whether in the West or the East, we have still failed to completely break free from this cycle, merely changing the name of the laws of our ancestors to procedural justice. As an old saying goes, “If a ruler rises by this, they must also fall by this.”

一位厅级干部写给女儿的忠告 2026-02-02 阅读需要24分钟 前几天，一位读者，分享了一份私密文档。
A Senior Official’s Advice to His Daughter 2026-02-02 Reading time: 24 minutes Recently, a reader shared a private document.

他说，这东西有点意思，你肯定感兴趣。
He said, “This is quite interesting, you must be interested.”

我打开一看，愣住了。
I opened it and was stunned.

不是什么惊天动地的秘密，也不是什么商业机密文件。
It wasn’t a groundbreaking secret, nor was it a confidential business document.

而是一位即将退休的厅级干部，写给自己刚入职体制内女儿的几条忠告。
And he was a retiring deputy department-level official, writing a few pieces of advice to his newly employed daughter within the system.

文字不长，很朴实，没有一句官话套话，全是掏心窝子的大白话。
The text is not long, very simple and down-to-earth, without a single empty or ceremonial phrase, all heartfelt and straightforward.

我反反复复读了三遍。
I read it over and over three times.

为什么？
Why?

因为这里面藏着的东西，跟我们平时在市面上看到的那些“职场攻略”“晋升宝典”完全不是一个维度的东西。
What’s hidden in this contains something that is completely on a different dimension from the “career strategies” and “promotion manuals” we usually see on the market.

那些所谓的攻略，都是“术”的层面，教你怎么送礼，怎么站队，怎么说场面话。
Those so-called strategies are all about the “art” level, teaching you how to give gifts, how to align yourself, how to speak appropriately.

而这位父亲写的，是“法”的层面，甚至是“道”的层面。
What this father wrote is about the “law” level, or even the “way” level.

他没有教女儿如何钻营，如何投机取巧。
He didn’t teach his daughter how to maneuver or how to take shortcuts.

他教的是，如何在一个庞大、复杂、充满人性博弈的系统里，安身立命，守住本心，并且还能把事做成，活出舒展的人生。
He teaches how to find one’s place, hold onto one’s principles, and still achieve success in a vast, complex, and humanly competitive system, living a fulfilling life.

这不仅是写给体制内的。
This is not just for those within the system.

也适合给每一个在复杂组织里生存的现代人的。
It’s also suitable for every modern person navigating complex organizations.

无论是国企、大厂、还是民企，只要有人的地方，就有江湖。
Whether it’s state-owned enterprises, large corporations, or private companies, as long as there are people, there’s a “world of martial arts.”

而这份忠告，就是一部在江湖里行走的“心法总纲”。
And this piece of advice is like a “master outline of the heart method” that travels in the martial world.

我征得了那位读者的同意，隐去所有身份信息，把里面的内核逻辑，揉碎了，掰开了，写了出来。
I have obtained the consent of that reader, obscuring all identity information, and have broken down and explained the core logic inside.

这里面的智慧，太过珍贵。
The wisdom here is too precious.

看懂了，至少让你少走十年弯路。
Understanding it will at least let you avoid ten years of detours.

一、单位即道场，人事皆修行
I. The unit is the training ground, all human affairs are practice

信的开头，父亲没有谈工作，而是先给女儿的心态，定了一个调。
At the beginning of the faith, the father did not talk about work but first set the tone for his daughter’s mindset.

他说：
He said:

“闺女，从今天起，你要把单位当成一个道场，把每天遇到的人和事，都当成一种修行。”
“Daughter, starting today, you should treat the unit as a training ground and see every person and thing you encounter every day as a form of practice.”

这句话，水平太高了。什么叫道场？
This sentence is too high level. What is a dōjō?

就是修炼心性的地方。
It is a place for cultivating one’s mind and character.

什么叫修行？
What is cultivation?

就是修正自己行为和念头的地方。
It is a place for correcting one’s actions and thoughts.

大部分年轻人，是怎么看待单位的？
How do most young people view their units?

是一个展现才华、实现抱负的舞台。
It is a stage to showcase talent and achieve ambitions.

是一个升职加薪、获取资源的战场。
It is a battlefield for promotions, salary increases, and acquiring resources.

所以，他们的心态是“战斗”和“索取”。
Therefore, their mindset is one of “combat” and “acquisition.”

遇到赏识自己的领导，就觉得是知遇之恩，恨不得掏心掏肺。
When encountering a leader who appreciates you, you feel it’s a favor of fate, and you can’t help but lay your heart and soul on the line.

遇到不待见自己的领导，就觉得是打压，是PUA，心里全是怨气。
When encountering a leader who looks down on you, you feel it’s suppression, like PUA, and you’re full of resentment.

遇到合得来的同事，就当成朋友，什么话都说。
When encountering colleagues you get along with, you treat them as friends and share everything.

遇到看不惯的同事，就当成敌人，处处设防，背后吐槽。
When encountering colleagues you can’t stand, you treat them as enemies, setting up defenses everywhere, and complain behind their backs.

做成了项目，就觉得是自己能力强，尾巴翘上天。
When a project is completed, one thinks it’s because of their own strength and becomes overly proud.

搞砸了事情，就觉得是别人不配合，环境太差，全是客观原因。
When things go wrong, one thinks it’s because others aren’t cooperative, the environment is too poor, and it’s all due to objective reasons.

你看，这种心态，本质上是把自己的喜怒哀乐，完全建立在了外部环境和他人评价之上。
You see, this mindset essentially bases one’s joys and sorrows entirely on external environments and others’ evaluations.

顺境则喜，逆境则怒。
Happy in prosperity, angry in adversity.

顺我者友，逆我者敌。
Those who follow me are friends, those who oppose me are enemies.

这是典型的“婴儿心态”。
This is a typical “infant mentality.”

情绪极其不稳定，能量耗散极其严重。
Emotions are extremely unstable, and energy is dissipated extremely severely.

而这位父亲，直接把维度拉到了顶层。
And this father, directly raised the dimension to the top.

单位不是战场，是道场。
The unit is not a battlefield, but a training ground.

同事不是战友或敌人，是来“渡”你的。
Colleagues are not comrades-in-arms or enemies, but those who come to “guide” you across challenges.

怎么理解？
How to understand this?

那个天天给你穿小鞋的同事，不是你的敌人。
That colleague who constantly gives you a hard time is not your enemy.

他是来“修行”你度量的。
He is here to “practice” your measurement.

你看他天天上蹿下跳，像不像一只被关在笼子里的猴子？
You see him jumping up and down every day, like a monkey kept in a cage, right?

你若动气，你就跟他成了一路人。
If you get angry, you become on the same side as him.

你若只是看着他表演，内心毫无波澜，你的层次就在他之上了。
If you just watch him perform without any inner turmoil, your level is above his.

那个天天骂你的领导，不是你的仇人。
The boss who scolds you every day is not your enemy.

他是来“修行”你定力的。他骂你，是他的情绪失控，是他的“熵增”。
He is here to “train” your determination. When he scolds you, it is his loss of emotional control, his “entropy increase.”

你若能从他的咆哮中，精准提炼出有效信息（哪里做得不对），并过滤掉所有情绪垃圾（人身攻击），你的心智就完成了一次“提纯”。
If you can accurately extract useful information (where you did wrong) from his outbursts and filter out all emotional waste (personal attacks), your mind has completed a “purification.”

那个抢了你功劳的同事，也不是你的敌人。
The colleague who stole your credit is also not your enemy.

他是来“修行”你格局的。
He is here to “practice” your perspective.

功劳这东西，能被抢走，说明它本身就不是你的。
Achievement is something that can be snatched away, which means it was never truly yours in the first place.

真正的功劳，是刻在你能力里的，是长在你身体上的，谁也抢不走。
True achievement is etched into your abilities, grown from your very being, and no one can take it away.

你若为此耿耿于怀，你的格局也就只有这点功劳大小。
If you hold onto this grievance, then your perspective is only as big as that achievement.

那个整天摸鱼的同事，也不是你要鄙视的人。
The colleague who always slacks off all day is not the person you should look down on.

他是来“修行”你定见的。
He is here to “practice” your preconceptions.

你看到他混日子，心里会不会不平衡？会不会也想跟着混？
When you see him coasting through the day, does it make you feel unbalanced? Would you also like to follow suit?

如果你能不受他影响，坚持做自己该做的事，你的“精神内核”就又稳固了一分。
If you can remain unaffected by him and 坚持 doing what you should, your “spiritual core” becomes a bit more solid.

我院子里的池塘里养了几条锦鲤。
A few koi are raised in the pond in my garden.

有时候，一条鱼会突然发疯，去冲撞另一条鱼。
Sometimes, a fish will suddenly go crazy and bump into another fish.

被撞的鱼，会怎么反应？
How will the fish that is bumped react?

它只是默默游开，继续自己寻食、摆尾。
It just swims away quietly, continuing to search for food and 摆尾.

它不会想着“报复”回去，不会觉得“鱼生无望”。
It won’t think about “retaliation” in return, nor will it feel “hopeless for the fish.”

因为它所有的行为，都源于它自己的生命节律，而不是对外界刺激的应激反应。
Because all its actions stem from its own life rhythm, rather than being a reflex response to external stimuli.

人也一样。
Humans are the same.

当你把单位当成道场，你就从一个“反应者”，变成了一个“观察者”。
When you treat the unit as a training ground, you transform from a “reactor” into an “observer.”

你站在一个更高的维度，像看一场戏一样，看着舞台上的人来来往往，上演着一幕幕关于贪婪、嫉妒、恐惧、虚荣的剧。
You stand in a higher dimension, like watching a play, observing the comings and goings of people on stage, performing one scene after another about greed, jealousy, fear, and vanity.

你不再入戏，所以你不会被剧情牵着鼻子走。
You no longer get caught up in the play, so you are not led by the plot.

你只是看，只是观察，然后对照自身，修正自己的念头和行为。
You just watch, just observe, and then compare with yourself, correcting your thoughts and actions.

这才是真正的高手。
This is what a true master is.

内心如如不动，外界狂风暴雨。
Inner mind remains steady, while the external world is like a storm of wind and rain.

这叫“磐石之心”。
This is called the “heart of a solid rock.”

二、守住身、心、能三条线
II. Hold fast to the three lines of body, mind, and ability

定了心态的调，父亲接着讲了具体要守住的东西。
Having set the mindset, the father then explained what specifically needs to be held onto.

他说，在体制内，想走得远，走得稳，不是看你多会来事，而是看你能守住几条底线。
He said that within the system, to go far and stay steady, it’s not about how skilled you are in pleasing others, but about how well you can uphold several bottom lines.

他提了三条线：身、心、能。
He mentioned three lines: body, mind, and ability.

第一，守身，是“本钱线”。
First, uphold your body, which is the “capital line.”

原话是这么说的：
The original words were:

“任何时候，都不要用身体去换前途。能不喝的酒就别喝，能不熬的夜就别熬。你爸在单位见多了三十多岁就一身病，四十多岁就倒下的。人没了，你之前挣的所有东西，都会变成一个笑话。”
“Under no circumstances should you trade your body for your future. If you can avoid drinking alcohol, don’t; if you can avoid staying up late, don’t. Your father has seen many people in the workplace who are in their thirties and already riddled with diseases, and those in their forties who collapse. Once you’re gone, all the things you’ve earned before will become nothing but a joke.”

这段话，看似平淡，实则字字千钧。
These words may seem ordinary, but each carries immense weight.

我之前接触过很多创业者，一个个都像打了鸡血。
I’ve met many entrepreneurs before, all of them like they’ve been injected with chicken blood.

每天工作16个小时，靠咖啡和红牛续命，把熬夜当成奋斗的勋章。
Working 16 hours a day, surviving on coffee and Red Bull, treating staying up late as a medal of struggle.

他们总觉得，年轻就是资本，现在拼命，是为了以后能更好地享受生活。
They always think that youth is capital, and that they are working hard now in order to better enjoy life in the future.

这是最大的幻觉。
This is the greatest illusion.

我一直强调，身体是什么？
I have always emphasized, what is the body?

身体不是你用来消耗的“资源”，它是你感知这个世界、承载你所有精神活动的唯一“法器”。
The body is not a “resource” that you use up; it is the only “tool” through which you perceive the world and carry out all your spiritual activities.

一个浑身病痛、精力衰败的身体，就像一个信号接收很差的收音机，你根本无法清晰地接收到这个世界的真实信息，你的判断力、决策力都会大幅下降。
A body riddled with illness and exhausted of vitality is like a radio with poor signal reception; you can’t clearly receive the true information of the world, and your judgment and decision-making abilities will decline significantly.

更重要的是，身体是“气血”的载体。
More importantly, the body is the carrier of “qi and blood.”

中医讲，气血足，则百病不侵，神思敏捷。
Traditional Chinese Medicine teaches that when qi and blood are abundant, all diseases are kept at bay, and the mind is sharp.

西医讲，激素水平稳定，内分泌平衡，则情绪稳定，精力充沛。
Western Medicine states that when hormone levels are stable and the endocrine system is balanced, emotions remain stable, and energy is abundant.

道理是一样的。
The principle is the same.

一个长期熬夜、饮食不规律、靠烟酒麻痹自己的人，他的“气血”一定是亏的。
A person who stays up late for a long time, has irregular diet, and numbs himself with cigarettes and alcohol, his “qi and blood” must be deficient.

表现在外，就是眼神浑浊，面色晦暗，情绪暴躁，注意力不集中。
This is manifested externally as unclear eyes, dim complexion, irritable mood, and poor concentration.

这样的人，你觉得他能有多大的“气场”？
How do you think such a person can have a strong “aura”?

他连自己的身体都掌控不了，你还能指望他掌控什么复杂的局面？
He can’t even control his own body, what else can you expect him to control in complex situations?

所以，这位父亲的智慧在于，他看到了最底层的东西。
So, the wisdom of this father lies in seeing the most fundamental things.

在体制这个漫长的马拉松里，最终胜出的，不是跑得最快的，而是跑得最久的。
In this long marathon of the system, the ultimate winner is not the one who runs the fastest, but the one who runs the longest.

健康，才是你最大的不动产，是你一切事业的“1”。
Health is your greatest real estate, the “1” for all your endeavors.

没有这个1，后面再多的0，都没有意义。
Without this 1, no matter how many 0s come after, they hold no meaning.

守身，就是守住你人生最大的那个“1”。
To guard one’s integrity is to hold onto the greatest “1” in your life.

第二，守心，是“安宁线”。
Second, to guard one’s heart is the “line of tranquility.”

父亲说：
My father said:

“单位里的事，70%是鸡毛蒜皮的破事，20%是正常的工作，只有10%是真正重要的事。
“Things at work, 70% are trivial matters, 20% are normal work, and only 10% are truly important matters.

你要守住你的心，不要让那70%的破事，占满你的脑子。”
You must hold onto your heart and don’t let those 70% of trivial matters fill your mind.”

这话说得太形象了。
This saying is too vivid.

什么是70%的破事？
What are the 70% of trivial matters?

今天谁跟谁吵架了。
Who argued with whom today.

明天谁的报销单又被卡了。
Whose reimbursement form got stuck tomorrow.

后天领导开会时一个眼神是什么意思。
What does the leader’s glance mean during the meeting the day after tomorrow.

谁又在背后说你坏话了。
Who is saying bad things about you behind your back again.

这些事，像苍蝇一样，嗡嗡嗡地在你耳边飞。
These things, like flies, buzz around your ears.

你一巴掌拍过去，手上沾了一堆恶心的东西，苍蝇却早就飞走了。
You slap them, and your hand gets covered in disgusting stuff, but the flies have long since flown away.

普通人是怎么做的？
How do ordinary people handle this?

深陷其中。
They get entangled deep in it.

别人说他一句，他要琢磨半天。
If someone says something to him, he has to ponder it for days.

领导一个脸色，他一晚上睡不着觉。
If his boss gives him a look, he can’t sleep all night.

跟同事有点摩擦，他能记恨一个月。
If he has a slight friction with a colleague, he can hold a grudge for a month.

他的心，就像一个没有主人的广场。
His heart is like an empty square without an owner.

任何人，任何事，都可以随时进来，大小便，吐口水，留下满地狼藉。
Anyone, anything, can come in anytime, urinate, spit, leave a mess all over the floor.

他的情绪，完全被这些鸡毛蒜皮的破事所左右。
His emotions are completely controlled by these trivial matters.

这叫什么？
What is this called?

这叫“心随境转”。
This is called “the heart follows the circumstances.”

高手是怎么做的？
How do experts do it?

守心。
Guard your heart.

他的心，是一座有护城河的城池。不是什么信息都能进来的。
His heart is a fortress with a moat. Not all information can get in.

他会给自己建立一个“信息防火墙”。
He builds a “firewall” for himself.

那些八卦、是非、流言蜚语，在到达他内心之前，就被防火墙拦截了。
The gossips, rumors, and slanderous talk were intercepted by the firewall before reaching his heart.

他不是听不到，而是听到了，也自动选择“不处理”。
He wasn’t deaf; he heard them, but automatically chose to “not process.”

就像电脑后台的垃圾进程，直接忽略。
Like the junk processes in the background of a computer, they were simply ignored.

我写文章前，有个习惯。
Before I write an article, I have a habit.

燃一线沉香，泡一壶老茶。
Ignite a wisp of 沉香, brew a pot of old tea.

这个过程，短则十分钟，长则半小时。
This process can take as short as ten minutes or as long as half an hour.

很多人以为这是一种“仪式感”，是附庸风雅。
Many people think this is a kind of “sense of ritual,” an affectation of elegance.

其实不是。
Actually, it’s not.

这是我在“守心”。
This is what I do at “Guard the Heart”.

燃香，是为了通过嗅觉，把我的精神从纷杂的外部世界，收回到我身体周围这个小小的“结界”里。
Burning incense is to use the sense of smell to draw my spirit back from the chaotic external world into this small “bubble” around my body.

泡茶，是通过一系列专注的动作（取茶、烫壶、注水、出汤），把我的念头，像用一根线一样，一个一个串起来，收束到“当下”这一刻。
Making tea is to use a series of focused actions (picking tea, warming the pot, pouring water, decanting) to string together my thoughts like beads on a thread, concentrating them into this “present” moment.

这个过程，就是在清空我内心的“垃圾缓存”，把那些鸡毛蒜皮的“后台进程”都关掉。
This process is like clearing the “cache” in my mind, shutting down all the trivial “background processes.”

然后，我才能以一个清明、安宁、专注的心，去处理那“10%真正重要的事”。
Then, I can handle the “10% truly important things” with a clear, peaceful, and focused mind.

在单位里，同样如此。
The same goes for work.

守住你的心，就是守住你最宝贵的注意力。
Holding onto your heart is to hold onto your most precious attention.

别让那些无关紧要的破事，消耗你有限的能量。
Don’t let those trivial matters drain your limited energy.

你的心，应该用来思考真正重要的问题，用来提升自己的核心能力。
Your heart should be used to think about truly important issues, to enhance your core abilities.

第三，守能，是“成长线”。
Third, guarding ability, is the “growth line.”

“能”，就是能量，或者说，一个人的“势”。
“Ability,” means energy, or rather, a person’s “momentum.”

父亲对女儿说：
The father said to the daughter:

“不要到处显摆你的能力，更不要轻易亮出你的底牌。年轻人有锐气是好事，但藏不住的锐气，是最大的凶器，会伤人，更容易伤己。要把你的能量，用在‘长本事’上，而不是‘长脾气’上。”
“Don’t show off your abilities everywhere, and don’t reveal your trump cards too easily. It’s good for young people to have sharpness, but hidden sharpness that can’t be concealed is the greatest 凶器, it can hurt others, and even more likely to hurt yourself. You should use your energy to ‘grow skills,’ rather than ‘grow temper.’”

这句话，点破了无数年轻人失败的根源。
This sentence exposes the root cause of failure for countless young people.

很多名校毕业，能力很强的年轻人，为什么在单位里混得不好？
Why do many young people with strong abilities from prestigious universities struggle in their workplaces?

就是因为他们太急于“证明自己”。
It’s because they are too eager to ‘prove themselves.’

写了个好方案，恨不得让全世界都知道。
Wrote a great plan, almost wanted the whole world to know.

做出了点成绩，就觉得同事都是傻子。
Achieved some results, then think all colleagues are fools.

开会时，总想抓住机会，一鸣惊人，语不惊人死不休。
During meetings, always want to seize the opportunity to make a stunning statement, die without making a shocking statement.

这在兵法上，叫“轻兵冒进”。
In military strategy, this is called “light army’s reckless advance.”

看起来很勇猛，其实最容易被伏击。
Looks fierce, but is actually the easiest to ambush.

因为你表现得越强，越有攻击性，你在系统里遇到的“阻力”就越大。
Because the stronger you act, the more aggressive you seem, the greater the “resistance” you encounter in the system.

你的同事会嫉妒你，给你使绊子。
Your colleagues will envy you and try to trip you up.

你的领导会提防你，觉得你功高震主，难以驾驭。
Your superiors will be wary of you, feeling that you are too powerful for your position and hard to control.

整个系统，会本能地排斥你这个“异类”。
The entire system will instinctively reject you as an “outsider.”

就像一根钢针，很锐利，但也很脆，一掰就断。
Like a steel needle, it is very sharp but also very brittle; it breaks with just a bend.

真正厉害的人，都懂得“守能”。
Truly formidable people understand the principle of “preserving potential.”

他们像一块璞玉，外表看起来灰扑扑的，毫不起眼。
They are like uncarved jade, looking dull on the outside and completely unremarkable.

只有在最关键的时候，切开一角，才会露出里面惊人的光华。
Only at the most critical moments, when a corner is cut open, does the astonishing brilliance within reveal itself.

他们把能量用在哪里？
Where are they using their energy?

用在暗处。
In the shadows.

用在没人看得见的地方。
In places where no one can see.

别人在酒桌上吹牛的时候，他在家里读书。
When others boast at the dinner table, he reads at home.

别人在办公室聊八卦的时候，他在默默研究业务，把一个问题挖到根上。
When others gossip in the office, he silently studies business, digging deep into a problem.

别人在争功诿过的时候，他在复盘，思考下一次如何能做得更好。
When others argue about credit and blame, he reviews, thinking about how to do better next time.

他不与人争一日之长短。
He does not compete with others over trivial matters.

因为他知道，时间的复利，才是最可怕的力量。
Because he knows that the compound interest of time is the most terrifying power.

他每天比别人多学一点，多思考一点，一年后，三年后，五年后，他与别人的差距，将是天壤之别。
He studies a little more and thinks a little more every day. After a year, three years, or five years, the gap between him and others will be as vast as heaven and earth.

到那个时候，他的“势”已经形成了。
By then, his “momentum” has already formed.

他不需要去争，机会会主动来找他。
He doesn’t need to fight for it; opportunities will come to him 主动.

因为在那个领域，他就是最专业的，就是不可替代的。
Because in that field, he is the most professional and irreplaceable.

整个系统，都会反过来依赖他。
The entire system will rely on him in turn.

这就像练武。
It’s like martial arts.

花拳绣腿，看起来很热闹，但不堪一击。
Flimsy martial arts, they may look lively, but they are easily defeated.

真正的高手，练的是“内功”。
The true masters practice “internal energy.”

一拳打出去，看似平平无奇，却蕴含着千钧之力。
A punch thrown out may seem ordinary at first glance, but it contains immense power.

守能，就是修炼你的“内功”。
Guarding is about cultivating your “internal energy.”

在别人看不见的地方，积蓄你的能量。
Accumulate your energy in places others cannot see.

然后，在关键时刻、一击制胜。
Then, at the critical moment, strike decisively.

三、成事三要：上合、中融、下沉
III. Three Keys to Success: Upper Alignment, Middle Integration, Lower Implementation

守住了这三条线，你就立于不败之地了。
If you hold fast to these three lines, you will be invincible.

但想成事，光“守”还不够，还得“动”。
But to achieve success, simply “holding fast” is not enough; you must also “act.”

父亲接着讲了成事的三个要诀：上合、中融、下沉。
Father then spoke of the three keys to success: upward alignment, middle integration, and downward penetration.

第一，上合，是“借力”。
First, upward alignment, which means “leveraging others’ strengths.”

原话是：“尊重你的每一任领导，理解他们的压力，解决他们的问题。
The original words were: “Respect every leader you have, understand their pressures, and solve their problems.

你要记住，你的工作，不是为了实现你自己的想法，而是为了帮助你的领导，实现他的想法。
You must remember, your work is not to realize your own ideas, but to help your leader realize his ideas.

你能帮他走多远，他就能带你走多远。”
The farther you can help him, the farther he can take you.”

这话太通透了。
This is so insightful.

很多年轻人，最容易犯的错误，就是把领导当成“敌人”或者“障碍”。
Many young people’s 最容易犯的错误 is treating leaders as “enemies” or “obstacles.”

总觉得领导水平不行，不懂业务，还瞎指挥。
They always think leaders lack competence, don’t understand the business, and give blind commands.

自己的方案明明更好，为什么总是不被采纳？
My own solution is clearly better, why is it always not adopted?

这是典型的“学生思维”。
This is a typical “student mindset.”

还在用“对错”来评价世界。
Still using “right or wrong” to evaluate the world.

成年人的世界，没有对错，只有“位置”和“利弊”。
In the adult world, there are no right or wrong, only “position” and “pros and cons.”

你的领导，坐在那个位置上，他看到的信息，他承受的压力，他要平衡的关系，跟你完全不一样。
Your leader, sitting in that position, the information he sees, the pressure he bears, the relationships he has to balance, are completely different from yours.

他做决策，首先考虑的不是“最优解”，而是“最稳妥解”。
When he makes decisions, he doesn’t consider the “optimal solution” first, but rather the “most stable solution.”

所以，什么叫“上合”？
So, what is the meaning of “upper-level alignment”?

不是溜须拍马，不是阿谀奉承。而是“换位思考”。
It’s not flattery, nor is it sycophancy. It’s “putting oneself in another’s shoes.”

你要站在你领导的位置上，去思考问题。
You need to stand in your leader’s position to think about the problems.

他最近的烦恼是什么？
What is his recent 烦恼?

是业绩指标完不成，还是跟其他部门关系紧张？
Is it not meeting performance indicators or having a tense relationship with other departments?

他的目标是什么？
What is his goal?

是想安稳退休，还是想再往上走一步？
Is it a desire for a stable retirement, or do you want to take it one step further?

当你能看懂他的“局”，你才能知道自己这颗“棋子”，应该落在哪里。
Only when you can understand his “game,” can you know where this “piece” of yours should be placed.

你要做的，不是去“说服”他，更不是去“挑战”他。
What you need to do is not to “persuade” him, nor to “challenge” him.

而是去“补位”。
But to “fill in the gaps.”

他想不到的，你帮他想到。
What he couldn’t think of, you thought for him.

他不方便做的，你帮他做了。
What he found inconvenient to do, you did for him.

他担心出问题的，你提前做好预案。
What he worried might go wrong, you prepared contingency plans in advance.

你要让自己，变成他手中最趁手的那件“兵器”。
You must make yourself, the most effective “weapon” in his hands.

让他觉得，有你在，他很“省心”。
Let him feel that with you, he is very “at ease.”

这才是最高级的“向上管理”。
This is the highest level of “upward management.”

你不是在管理他，你是在成就他。
You are not managing him, you are accomplishing him.

而成就他，最终也成就了你自己。
And accomplishing him ultimately accomplishes yourself.

因为你们在一条船上，船走得远了，你自然也水涨船高。
Because you are on the same boat, as the boat moves further, you naturally rise with the tide.

第二，中融，是“结缘”。
Second, Zhongrong, is “forming a bond.”

父亲说：“不要把同事当成家人，但也绝不能当成敌人。
Father said, “Don’t treat colleagues as family, but you can never treat them as enemies.

大家只是萍水相逢的缘分，处得来就多说两句，处不来就客客气气。
Everyone is just a chance encounter, talk more if you get along, and be polite if you don’t.

不要背后说人坏话，不要拉帮结派，但要懂得主动释放善意。”
Don’t speak ill of others behind their backs, don’t form cliques, but learn to proactively show kindness.”

这段话，把人际关系的“度”，拿捏得炉火纯青。
This passage has a perfect grasp of the “degree” in interpersonal relationships.

什么叫“不要当家人”？
What does “not being a family member” mean?

就是要有边界感。
It means having a sense of boundaries.

同事之间，就是工作关系。
Colleagues are just work relations.

不要有过多的情感期待，更不要把私生活和盘托出。
Don’t have too many emotional expectations, and even more so, don’t lay your private life out on the table.

今天跟你称兄道弟的，明天可能就是踩你最狠的那个。
The person who calls you brother today might be the one who steps on you the hardest tomorrow.

人性，经不起考验。
Human nature can’t stand the test.

什么叫“不能当敌人”？
What is the meaning of “not being able to be an enemy”?

就是不要主动树敌。
It means not to actively create enemies.

在一个组织里，多一个朋友，就是多一条路。多一个敌人，就是多一堵墙。
In an organization, having one more friend is like having one more path. Having one more enemy is like having one more wall.

你永远不知道，今天你得罪的这个小人物，明天会出现在什么关键位置上，给你致命一击。
You will never know, the small person you offend today, might appear in a critical position tomorrow, giving you a fatal blow.

那应该怎么做？
What should be done then?

“中融”。
“Zhong Rong”.

融，不是融合，而是“圆融”。
Rong, not fusion, but “round and harmonious”.

像水一样，随方就圆，润物无声。
Like water, adaptable to square or round, nourishing silently.

核心就两个字：“结缘”。
The core is just two words: “forming connections.”

结善缘。
Forming good connections.

怎么结？
How to form them?

其实很简单。
It’s actually very simple.

一杯咖啡，一声谢谢，一次举手之劳。
A cup of coffee, a word of thanks, a small favor.

同事电脑坏了，你懂点技术，主动帮他看看。
A colleague’s computer breaks down, and you have some technical knowledge, so you 主动 help them check it out.

同事忙不过来，你手头正好有空，帮他分担一点。
A colleague is overwhelmed, and you happen to have free time, so you help share the load a bit.

别人分享了零食，你下次也记得带点东西回馈。
Someone shares snacks with you, and you remember to bring something next time to reciprocate.

这些都是微不足道的小事。
These are all trivial matters.

但就像往一个存钱罐里，每天投进一枚硬币。
But just like putting a coin in a piggy bank every day.

日积月累，你的人缘银行里，就有了丰厚的“存款”。
Over time, in your “relationship bank,” you’ll have a substantial “deposit.”

到了关键时刻，你需要别人帮忙的时候，你才有“信用”可以支取。
When the critical moment comes, when you need help from others, you’ll have “credit” to withdraw.

更重要的是，这种“与人为善”的状态，会极大地优化你的“能量场”。
What’s more important, this state of “being kind to others” can greatly optimize your “energy field.”

你对世界释放善意，世界也会回报你善意。
The more kindness you release to the world, the more kindness the world will return to you.

你身边会聚集越来越多愿意帮你的人。
More and more people willing to help you will gather around you.

你的路，自然越走越宽。
Your path will naturally become wider.

反之，一个处处与人为敌，斤斤计较的人，他身边只会充满负能量。
On the contrary, a person who is always at odds with others and is overly meticulous, will only be surrounded by negative energy.

他会觉得全世界都在跟他作对。
He will feel as if the whole world is against him.

他的路，只会越走越窄。
His path will only become narrower and narrower.

这就是“物以类聚，人以群分”的底层逻辑。
This is the underlying logic of “Birds of a feather flock together, and people of similar minds associate with each other.”

第三，下沉，是“扎根”。
Third, sinking, is “taking root.”

父亲的最后一条建议是：
The father’s last piece of advice was:

“不管你以后做到什么位置，永远不要看不起基层的人，永远不要脱离一线。你要像一棵树，枝叶可以向着天空无限伸展，但你的根，必须深深地扎在泥土里。”
“Regardless of how high you achieve in the future, never look down on grassroots people, never detach from the front line. You must be like a tree, with branches and leaves that can stretch infinitely towards the sky, but your roots must be deeply planted in the soil.”

这是整封信里，我个人最喜欢的一句话。
This was the sentence I personally liked the most in the entire letter.

充满了哲学的智慧。
Filled with philosophical wisdom.

一个人，什么时候会开始走下坡路？
When does a person start going downhill?

就是当他“飘”起来的时候。
It is when he “drifts” away.

当他坐进了宽敞的办公室，听惯了下属的汇报，看惯了美化的报表。
When he sits in a spacious office, gets used to subordinates’ reports, and is accustomed to seeing embellished reports.

他就开始慢慢失去对“真实世界”的感知。
He began to gradually lose his sense of the “real world.”

他以为世界就是PPT里写的那个样子。
He thought the world was just like what was written in the PowerPoint presentation.

他会觉得，一线的员工，学历低，见识短，想法幼稚。
He would feel that front-line employees were uneducated, short-sighted, and had 幼稚 ideas.

他会觉得，客户的需求，都是刁钻、不合理的。
He would feel that customer demands were all sharp, unreasonable.

他不再愿意去车间走一走，去门店看一看，去跟最普通的员工和客户聊一聊。
He is no longer willing to go to the workshop for a walk, visit the store to take a look, or chat with the most ordinary employees and customers.

他的脚，离地了。
His feet have left the ground.

他的根，断了。
His roots have been broken.

这样的人，无论他现在的位置有多高，他都已经成了一个“空心人”。
Someone like him, no matter how high his position is now, has already become a “hollow person.”

一阵大风吹来，第一个倒下的，就是他。
A strong wind blew, and the first one to fall was him.

我为什么坚持每年要有大量时间，在中国的大地上行走？
Why do I insist on spending a lot of time walking across the land of China every year?

从一线城市，到二三线，再到偏远的小镇县城。
From first-tier cities to second and third-tier cities, and then to remote small towns and counties.

我不住五星级酒店，我喜欢住在那些最有本地烟火气的街区。
I don’t stay in five-star hotels; I prefer to live in neighborhoods with the most local atmosphere.

我喜欢去逛菜市场，去坐公交车，去跟那些开小店的、摆地摊的、开出租车的师傅们聊天。
I enjoy visiting the vegetable market, taking the bus, and chatting with the shopkeepers, street vendors, and taxi drivers.

因为他们，才是这片土地的“根”。
Because they are the “roots” of this land.

他们的喜怒哀乐，他们的家长里短，他们的生存智慧，构成了这个社会最真实的“底盘”。
Their joys and sorrows, their daily lives, and their survival wisdom form the most authentic “foundation” of this society.

只有触摸到这个底盘，你所有的思考和判断，才是有根的。
Only by touching this foundation can your thoughts and judgments be rooted.

你才不会被那些云端上的概念和理论所迷惑。
You won’t be deceived by those concepts and theories in the clouds.

在单位里，也是一个道理。
It’s the same in the workplace.

“下沉”，就是建立你的“现实感”。
“Going down,” means establishing your “sense of reality.”

你要知道，一份文件，从你手里下去，要经过多少道程序，会遇到多少实际的困难。
You need to know that a document, once it leaves your hands, has to go through how many procedures and will encounter how many practical difficulties.

你要知道，一个客户，为了一个小小的问题，可能要打多少个电话，跑多少个部门。
You have to know, for a client, how many phone calls they might have to make and how many departments they might have to run around for a small issue.

你要知道，一个保安，一个保洁阿姨，他们一个月挣多少钱，他们是怎么看待你这个“白领”的。
You have to know, for a security guard, for an elderly cleaner, how much they earn in a month, and how they view you, this “white-collar” person.

当你对这一切，都有了切身的体感，你才不会做出那些“何不食肉糜”的荒唐决策。
Only when you have a personal sense of all this, will you not make those absurd decisions like “why not eat meat instead of porridge.”

你的内心，才会多一份对他人的“慈悲”和“敬畏”。
Your heart will then have more compassion and reverence for others.

这种慈悲和敬畏，会让你整个人，变得厚重。
This compassion and awe will make your whole being, substantial.

你不再是一个轻飘飘的职位符号，你是一个活生生、有温度的人。
You are no longer just a light, floating job title; you are a living, warm person.

这样的人，无论走到哪里，都会被人发自内心地尊重。
Such a person, wherever they go, will be respected from the bottom of their heart.

因为他，扎根了。
Because he, has rooted.

把这封信里的智慧，总结一下：
Summarize the wisdom in this letter:

一个心态：
One mindset:

道场心态，把一切人事，都当成修炼自己的工具。
Dojo mindset, treat everything human and interpersonal as tools for your own cultivation.

三条底线：
Three bottom lines:

守身（健康），守心（安宁），守能（实力）。
Guard the body (health), guard the heart (tranquility), guard the ability (strength).

三个要诀：
Three key principles:

上合（借力），中融（结缘），下沉（扎根）。
Upper harmony (leverage), middle fusion (build connections), lower sinking (rooting).

写到这里，我有一种很深的感慨。
Writing this, I have a deep sense of reflection.

这位父亲用自己几十年的宦海沉浮，为女儿提炼出了这几条安身立命的“心法”。
This father, through his decades of ups and downs in the political arena, has distilled these “heart methods” for his daughter to survive and thrive.

这是血脉相传的“家学”。
This is the “family learning” passed down through generations.

但你有没有发现，这些智慧，其实散落在我们古老经典里。
But have you noticed that this wisdom is actually scattered throughout our ancient classics.

道家的无为，儒家的中庸，佛家的观心，兵家的势能…
Daoist 无为, Confucian 中庸, Buddhist 观心, Military strategist 势能…

只是，我们这个时代太快了。
Just that our era is too fast.

快到我们没有时间去读经典，更没有能力，把经典里的智慧，与我们当下的生活，联系起来。
Fast to the point where we don’t have time to read classics, nor the ability to connect the wisdom within them to our current lives.

这些年我一直在做这件事，就是把我从古今中外的经典里，从我行走大地的见闻里，从无数次的与人交谈的感悟里，提炼、萃取出的50个思维模型。
Over the years, I have been doing this: distilling and extracting 50 thinking models from the classics of ancient and modern China and the world, from my observations while traveling, and from countless insights gained through conversations with others.

我把这些最核心的50个模型，一部30万字的电子书，分为5大模块，50个章节，取名为《格物心法》，你可以在公Z号“朝朝书房”获取。
I have organized these 50 core models into a 300,000-character e-book, divided into 5 major modules and 50 chapters, titled “The Art of Inquiry.” You can obtain it on the WeChat account “Zaozao Study Room.”

它就像一个“操作系统”，帮你把那些零散的、朴素的、甚至相互矛盾的人生经验，整合到一个统一、清晰、强大的框架里。
It’s like an “operating system,” helping you integrate those scattered, simple, and even contradictory life experiences into a unified, clear, and powerful framework.

比如，父亲提到的“守心”，对应到书里，就是控制二分法、情绪ABC理论、汉隆的剃刀等一系列让你内心安宁的模型。
For example, “guarding the heart” mentioned by the father corresponds to the book, which includes a series of models that bring inner peace, such as the duality of control, the ABC theory of emotions, and Hanlon’s razor.

他提到的“上合、中融”，背后是囚徒困境、互惠原理、社会认同原理这些博弈论和关系学的底层逻辑。
“Upper convergence, middle integration” he mentioned is based on the underlying logic of game theory and relationship studies, such as the prisoner’s dilemma, the principle of reciprocity, and the principle of social identity.

他提到的“守能”，就是复利效应、能力圈、杠杆思维的现实应用。
“Guarding energy” he mentioned is the practical application of the compounding effect, the circle of competence, and leverage thinking.

这封信，是一位父亲给女儿的“地图”。
This letter is a “map” from a father to his daughter.

而这本书，是教你如何绘制和使用所有地图的“指南针”。
And this book is a “compass” that teaches you how to draw and use all maps.

它能让你在任何复杂的系统里，都能看清本质，找到自己的位置。
It allows you to see the essence and find your place in any complex system.

如果你也渴望拥有信中父亲那样的通透智慧，活出清醒、丰盛、自洽的生命状态。
If you also desire the profound wisdom of the father in the letter, to live a clear, abundant, and self-possessed life.

这本书或许是你为自己做的，一次最好的“价值投资”。
This book might be the best “value investment” you’ve made for yourself.

最后，我想用信中的一句话结尾。
Finally, I’d like to conclude with a line from the letter.

父亲对女儿说：
The father said to his daughter:

“爸爸不求你做多大的官，只求你在看尽了单位的种种不堪后，依然能保留内心的那份干净，活得像一个真实、舒展、有温度的人。”
“I don’t expect you to achieve high positions, I only hope that after you’ve seen the 种种不堪 of the unit, you can still retain the purity of your heart and live as a real, open, and warm person.”

我想，这或许是所有智慧的最终指向。
I think, this may be the ultimate direction of all wisdom.

不是为了让我们赢得世界。
Not to win the world for us.

而是为了让我们在赢得世界的同时，没有弄丢自己。
But to let us not lose ourselves while winning the world.

本文来自《朝朝日记》专栏，可以在公Z号“朝朝书房”获取300篇+文章合集。
This article is from the “Early Morning Diary” column, and you can get a collection of 300+ articles from the WeChat account “Early Morning Study Room.”

我是朝朝，每天更新深度长文，助你实现认知跃迁！
I am Chao Chao, updating in-depth long articles every day to help you achieve cognitive leaps!

已写《格物心法》《五行读书方法论》《五行写作方法论》认知跃迁三部曲110万字
I have written the Cognitive Leap Trilogy, including “The Method of Inquiry,” “The Five Elements Reading Methodology,” and “The Five Elements Writing Methodology,” totaling 1.1 million words.

已开设新课程《人生格物学》专栏
I have launched a new course, the “Life Inquiry Studies”专栏.

布局三年，没人敢瞧不起你 2026-01-19 阅读需要2分钟 1、每天11点前睡觉，早上6点钟起床，绝不熬夜。
Plan for three years, no one dares to look down on you 2026-01-19 Reading time needed: 2 minutes 1. Go to bed before 11 a.m. and wake up at 6 a.m. every day, never stay up late.

2、每天坚持看书一个小时以上，每年看书20本以上。
2、Dedicate at least one hour per day to reading, and read more than 20 books per year.

3、三年至少要看15本顶级企业家自传，并且自己总结该企业家成功的经验是什么。
3、Over the course of three years, read at least 15 autobiographies of top entrepreneurs and summarize what made these entrepreneurs successful.

4、多看经济学、营销、管理学方面的书。
4、Read more books on economics, marketing, and management.

5、多看提升认知方面的书，不看小说。
5、Read more books that enhance cognitive abilities, and avoid reading novels.

6、多跟混得好的人、优秀的人交朋友。
6、Make friends with people who are good at mixing and excellent.

7、多交一流的朋友!
7、Make friends with first-class people!

8、多读书，多读一流的好书，读书必做读书笔记。
8、Read more books, read first-class good books, and must take notes when reading.

9、AA制聚餐，不去。
9、AA dinner, don’t go.

10、同学聚会、校友聚会，不去。
10、Class reunions, alumni gatherings, don’t go.

11、三年时间，给自己定一个存款的目标。
11、Three years, set a savings goal for yourself.

12、努力开拓副 业增加收入，没方向可以看[创商院]这个工众呺，每天多Z大几张很轻松。
12、Strive to develop side businesses to increase income, no direction can look at [Chuangshangyuan] this official account, more than Z big several very easy.

13、远离消耗自己的人和事。
13、Stay away from people and things that consume you.

14、去办事或者赴约，永远提前十分钟到场，不要2/12别人等你。
14、When going to handle matters or meet someone, always arrive ten minutes early and don’t make others wait for you.

15、在同行里，找一个人作为自己的偶像向他学习。
15、Within your peers, find someone to be your idol and learn from them.

16、每个月请自己吃一次大餐，犒劳一下自己
16、Treat yourself to a big meal once a month to reward yourself.

17、多看名人的访谈录，关键信息做好笔记
17、Watch interviews with celebrities and take notes on key information.

18、多向情商高的人学习说话。
18、Learn how to speak from people with high emotional intelligence in multiple directions.

19、多跟自己的上司、老板学习，他们都是有一定的能力的。
19、Learn a lot from your superiors and bosses, they all have certain abilities.

20、跟所有能让你自己发财的人搞好关系
20、Get along well with everyone who can make you rich.

21、如果遇到了贵人拉了你一把，一定要好好抱紧大腿，能带你飞。
21、If you meet a helpful person who pulls you up, you must hold onto their leg tightly, as they can take you to great heights.

22、没事，尽量少发朋友圈。
22、It’s okay, try to post less on social media.

23、领导的朋友圈，只点赞，不点评。
23、For your leader’s social media posts, just like, don’t comment.

24、不玩游戏，把时间省下来提升认知。
24、Don’t play games, save time to enhance your cognition.

25、看电影，只看得奖的大片。
25、Watch movies, only the award-winning ones.

26、有空多去本地最繁华的地方走走逛逛让自己更有奋斗的欲望。
26、Take time to explore the most vibrant places locally to inspire yourself with a stronger drive to strive.

27、如果可以，一定要去一线城市上班或者转转，那里集聚着最厉害的人才。
27、If possible, make sure to work or visit in a first-tier city, where the most talented individuals gather.

28、努力在一行里沉淀下去，三年入行，五年懂行，十年称王，等你在一个行业里做了十年以后，你就是老师傅了。
28、Work hard to gain expertise in your field. Three years to enter, five years to understand, ten years to master. After ten years in an industry, you’ll be considered a seasoned expert.

29、一定要给自己买一身好衣服，这样你去参加聚会就，更有自信一点，别省这点钱。
29、Make sure to invest in good clothes for yourself. This will boost your confidence when attending gatherings. Don’t skimp on this.

30、想想自己的优点是什么，努力将自己的优势发挥到极致，这才是最重要的，不要在自己不擅长的地方浪费时间。
30、Think about your strengths and strive to maximize them, that is the most important thing. Don’t waste time on things you are not good at.

31、向混得好的人学习人情世故，不懂人情世故的人，很难混得好。
31、Learn from those who do well in social circles about human relationships. Those who don’t understand human relationships find it hard to succeed.

32、每年都要给自己定更高的目标，这样自己才会更有上进的动力。
32、Set higher goals for yourself every year so that you will have more motivation to improve.

33、不浪费时间在无效社交上面。
33、Don’t waste time on 无效 socializing.

从马哲看“底层女性”所受到的苦难来自哪里? 2026-01-27 阅读需要6分钟 本文无不良内容，无不良影响。
Where do the hardships faced by “lower-class women” come from, from the perspective of Marxist philosophy? 2026-01-27 Reading time: 6 minutes This article contains no harmful content and has no adverse effects.

这阵子陆续收到好些读者的私信，都提了同一个名字：王慧玲。其实她的那些观点，在我看来并不新鲜，本不打算专门来谈。直到前不久，她在多个平台接连被封，讨论的声音却骤然沸腾——双方争得热闹，却似乎都绕开了问题的根子。那今天，不妨就来碰碰这个“敏感”的话题。
Lately, I’ve received several private messages from readers, all mentioning the same name: Wang Huiling. In fact, her views don’t seem new to me, and I didn’t originally plan to discuss them specifically. Until recently, she was banned from multiple platforms one after another, yet the discussion around the issue suddenly heated up—both sides argued passionately, yet it seemed they both avoided the root of the problem. So today, let’s touch on this “sensitive” topic.

这两年，“原生家庭”、“情绪价值”、“女性觉醒”之类的词汇被短视频平台上的那些情感博主频繁提及，Ta们共同的指向，就是所谓的“女性主义”。“女性主义”到今年随着央视婚姻家庭三部曲（《玫瑰的故事》、《凡人歌》、《好团圆》）的播出获得了更广泛的热度，王慧玲也正是在这个阶段登上神坛再瞬间跌落。
In the past two years, terms like “原生家庭” (native family), “情绪价值” (emotional value), and “女性觉醒” (women’s awakening) have been frequently mentioned by emotional bloggers on short video platforms, all pointing to what is 所谓的 “feminism” (feminism). This year, “feminism” gained even broader popularity with the release of CCTV’s three-part series on marriage and family (“The Story of Roses,” “Songs of Ordinary People,” “A Good 团圆”). Wang Huiling rose to fame during this period and then fell just as quickly.

话题当然不会因一个人的消失而终止。流量土壤还在，就总会有新的“王慧玲”冒出来。毕竟，她们所谈论的某些困境，并非空穴来风。
The topic will not end just because one person disappears. As long as the soil of popularity remains, there will always be new “Wang Huiling” figures to emerge. After all, some of the dilemmas they discuss are not baseless.

比如就业中隐形的门槛、婚姻与生育带来的压力、家庭暴力、性骚扰，乃至一些地方仍顽固存在的重男轻女观念……这些问题中，一部分虽被法律明文禁止，却在实际中暗流涌动；另一部分则更深地藏在家庭的门后，法律的手往往伸不了那么远。
For example, the invisible barriers in employment, the pressure brought by marriage and childbirth, domestic violence, sexual harassment, and even the stubbornly persistent concept of son preference in some places… Among these issues, some are explicitly prohibited by law but still flow underground in reality; others are deeply hidden behind family doors, where the law often cannot reach.

王慧玲们瞄准的，主要是后者。也正因如此，她的声音才戳中了一部分女性的心事。
Wang Huiling’s target is mainly the latter. It is precisely for this reason that her voice strikes a chord with some women.

但即便她点出了某些真实存在的痛处，细看她开出的“药方”，却实在让人不敢恭维。无非是把“情绪价值”捧到天上，说些乍听痛快、实则空洞的话。除了帮她收割流量，养活她那被传得沸沸扬扬的海外生活，对于真正身处困境的女性，又有多少切实的助益呢？
However, even though she points out certain real pain points, a closer look at the “prescriptions” she offers is truly not commendable. It merely elevates “emotional value” to the heavens, speaking of things that sound satisfying at first but are actually hollow. Beyond helping her harvest traffic and sustaining the rumored extravagant overseas life, how much practical benefit does it bring to women who are truly in dire straits?

封杀之后，有网友给她粉丝画了像：人群多集中在北京、上海、深圳这些大城市，用的手机不是苹果就是华为……结论似乎是，她的追随者多是都市白领女性。而真正占多数的、沉默的底层女性，反而很少关注她。
After being banned, some netizens drew portraits of her followers: the crowd is mostly concentrated in big cities like Beijing, Shanghai, and Shenzhen, using either Apple or Huawei phones… The conclusion seems to be that her followers are mostly urban white-collar women. Meanwhile, the majority of women from the grassroots who are silent are rarely concerned about her.

这里其实有个误读。王慧玲那本《基层女性》里的“基层”，并不等同于“底层”。“基层”是个挺宽泛的词，但凡不是出身显赫，似乎都能被囊括进去；而“底层”，则牵扯到更坚硬的社会结构词汇——阶级。
There’s actually a misunderstanding here. The term “grassroots” in Wang Huiling’s book *Women at the Grassroots* doesn’t equate to “bottom rung.” “Grassroots” is a quite broad term, seemingly encompassing anyone not born into prominence; whereas “bottom rung” involves a more rigid social structure term—class.

她恐怕从没打算为底层女性代言，甚至话语间，隐约还带着点对体力劳动的轻视。记得她在一次访谈里劝告农村女性进城别进工厂，该去做销售、公关。你看，她的目标受众很明确：是那些有消费能力、能带来流量的“都市女性”。至于流水线上的女工、田间地头的农妇，或许从来不在她的话语场里。
She probably never intended to speak for women at the bottom rung, and even in her tone, there was a subtle disdain for manual labor. I remember in an interview, she advised rural women moving to the city not to take factory jobs but to pursue sales or public relations. See? Her target audience was very clear: those urban women with 消费能力 (consumption ability) who could bring traffic. As for women on assembly lines or farmers in the fields, they might have never been part of her discourse.

更关键的是，她的整个观点体系，都刻意避开了“阶级”这个视角。这就导致，哪怕她真心想替城市女性说话，也很容易找错病因，开错药。
More crucially, her entire worldview deliberately avoids the perspective of “class.” This leads to the problem that even if she genuinely wanted to speak for urban women, she would easily misdiagnose the root causes and prescribe the wrong solutions.

家庭矛盾的根子，究竟在哪儿？
Where exactly do family conflicts stem from?

恰恰是经济不景气让大多数平民家庭越来越陷入窘境，多数人活得越来越压抑、越来越不顺心、越来越对现状不满；家人之间，一点琐事就能擦出火来，丈夫嫌妻子不理解赚钱的辛苦，妻子怨丈夫不懂持家育儿的劳累。
%% It is precisely the economic downturn that pushes most ordinary families deeper into hardship, with many people feeling increasingly oppressed, dissatisfied, and resentful of their current situation; even minor disagreements among family members can spark conflicts. The husband complains that his wife doesn’t understand the hardships of earning money, while the wife blames him for not understanding the exhaustion of managing the household and raising children.

工业化的齿轮碾过，家庭的生产功能日渐萎缩，成员各自外出谋生，相聚的时间少了，彼此间的纽带也松了。再加上消费主义日夜鼓噪，攀比、算计悄悄渗进门内……这些，恐怕才是更深层的病灶。
As the gears of industrialization turn, the productive function of the family is gradually declining. Members go out to earn a living separately, spending less time together, and the bonds between them weaken. Added to this is the relentless clamor of consumerism, where comparisons and calculations seep into the home… These, perhaps, are the deeper underlying issues.

用一句老话来概括，其实就是：资本主义在侵蚀家庭。若真想缓解由家庭矛盾凸显出的“女性困境”，恐怕得直面更根本的社会不平等与剥削。
To summarize with an old saying: it is capitalism that is eroding the family. If one truly wants to alleviate the “female 困境” highlighted by family conflicts, one must confront the more fundamental social inequalities and exploitation.

但王慧玲们对此避而不谈，转而把矛头指向家庭内部的男性，编出什么“一女三吃”的噱头。这无形中，是不是放过了真正的剥削结构，反而成了资本的帮手？
But Wang Huiling and others avoid discussing this, instead directing their criticism at the men within the family, inventing gimmicks like “one woman, three mouths to feed.” In doing so, aren’t they overlooking the true structure of exploitation and, in effect, becoming accessories to capital?

物化，异化，是资本主义的另一张面孔。而对女性，这种物化往往更加残酷——她们不仅像男性一样被当作生产与消费的“商品”，还额外被标上“性”与“生育”的价签。王慧玲们大肆渲染的，正是后者。
Objectification, alienation, are another face of capitalism. And for women, this objectification is often more cruel—they are not only treated as “commodities” for production and consumption like men, but are additionally labeled with the price tags of “sex” and “fertility.” What Wang Huiling and her ilk heavily promote is precisely the latter.

马克思主义还揭示了一个本质问题，就是商品的价值体现在商品交换的过程中。当王慧玲们教唆女性充分保护和利用自己的“性价值”和“生育价值”的时候，实际上的潜台词就是让女性把作为自然属性的使用价值拿出来明码标价，参与市场交换，这不是在尊重女性，帮助女性独立、觉醒，而恰恰是在帮助资本物化女性，是在加剧资本对女性的压榨！或许她的粉丝很难一下子理解这层逻辑。举个或许不恰当但直白的例子：她曾公然鼓吹卖淫、代孕合法化，美其名曰防止女性被“白嫖”。可一旦真的“合法”，早已暗流涌动的市场会立刻陷入血腥竞争，价格只会暴跌到尘埃里。这到底是在帮女性，还是在把她们往火坑里推？
Marxism also reveals a fundamental issue: the value of a commodity is reflected in the process of commodity exchange. When Wang Huiling and her ilk teach women to fully protect and utilize their “sexual value” and “fertility value,” the actual subtext is to have women put their natural attributes as use value on the market at a fixed price, participating in market exchange. This is not respecting women, helping them become independent or awaken, but rather helping capital to objectify women and exacerbating capital’s exploitation of women! Perhaps her fans find it hard to grasp this logic at once. Let me give an example, though perhaps inappropriate, to illustrate the point: she openly advocated for the legalization of prostitution and surrogacy, calling it a way to prevent women from being “exploited.” But once it becomes “legal,” the already simmering market would immediately fall into bloody competition, with prices crashing to the ground. Is this helping women, or pushing them into a fire?

“资本主义摧毁家庭”，这尽管是一个自发的过程，但这个过程对底层来说绝不是什么美好的事物，它只是剥削压迫的衍生品。在个体还无力改变系统的时候，家庭的存在反而是个体能够以亲缘关系为纽带形成的最小集体单位来对抗外部压迫的避风港。
“Capitalism destroys the family,” though this is an inevitable process, it is by no means a pleasant one for the lower classes—it is merely a byproduct of exploitation and oppression. When individuals are still powerless to change the system, the existence of the family is rather a safe haven for individuals to form the smallest collective units based on kinship to resist external oppression.

而王慧玲们连这个小小的避风港都不放过，恨不能将每个个体彻底的原子化，进一步分割成相互独立的商品，这难道不是在充当资本的打手吗？ 本文章由互联网转载，不代表个人观点，供大家阅读。
But Wang Huiling and her ilk do not even spare this small safe haven, wishing to completely atomize every individual, further dividing them into mutually independent commodities. Is this not acting as the henchmen of capital? This article is reprinted from the internet and does not represent personal views, for everyone to read.

本文分享对社会国际经济的观点。
This article shares views on the international economy of society.

本文无代指任何体制或社会。
This article does not represent any system or society.

本文章遵守互联网相关法律规定。
This article complies with relevant laws and regulations of the internet.

本文章遵守《抖音社区自律公约》。
This article complies with the “Douyin Community Self-Discipline Agreement.”

本文坚持女性的解放事业。
This article upholds the cause of women’s liberation.

本文借用了AI进行润色，原文来自：子夜呐喊|微信公众号
This article uses AI for polishing, the original text is from: Ziyye Nanhao | WeChat Official Account

你仔细观察，就会发现一个扎心的事实：大多数中国男人，骨子里，还是农民属性。
If you observe carefully, you will find a heart-wrenching fact: most Chinese men, at their core, still have a farmer’s nature.

真正具有商人属性的男人，少之又少。
Men who truly possess a merchant’s nature are few and far between.

这种差别，体现在生活中的方方面面。
This difference is reflected in all aspects of life.

它决定了你怎么看世界，怎么做选择，怎么活这一生。
It determines how you see the world, how you make choices, and how you live your life.

什么是农民属性？
What is the attribute of a farmer?

思维上重积累，怕流动。
Thinking focuses on accumulation, afraid of movement.

行为上重苦干，怕博弈。
Behaviorally, they emphasize hard work and fear competition.

决策上重安稳，怕变化。
In decision-making, they prioritize stability and fear change.

农民属性重的人，他们不习惯去制造机会，只会等机会；他们不敢玩规则，只会守规矩；他们不懂让别人为自己所用，只相信自己的辛苦付出最可靠。
Those with a strong farmer’s mindset are not accustomed to creating opportunities; they only wait for them. They dare not play by the rules; they only follow them. They don’t understand how to leverage others for their own benefit; they only believe that their hard work is the most reliable.

他们喜欢一步一个脚印，讨厌不确定，最怕的就是折腾。
They prefer to take things step by step and dislike uncertainty, fearing the most the chaos and disruption.

哪怕是成了城里人，哪怕是读了名校，哪怕是身家几百几千万，骨子里还是农民，思维逻辑还是农民。
Even if one becomes a city dweller, even if one attends a prestigious university, even if one has assets worth hundreds of millions, one is still fundamentally a farmer at heart, and one’s way of thinking remains that of a farmer.

这种属性，渗透在生活的各个角落。
This quality permeates every corner of life.

比如赚钱。
For example, in making money.

农民属性的人，喜欢做“体力式的投入”，干多少活，拿多少钱。
People with a “farmer’s nature” prefer to engage in “labor-intensive investments,” earning money in direct proportion to the amount of work they do.

他们赚钱靠拼时间，拼劳力，拼服务，赚的都是辛苦钱。
They make money by pitting time against time, labor against labor, and service against service, earning only hard-earned money.

他们不理解杠杆，不理解资本，不理解交易，总觉得“买卖赚钱”是不道德的，差价套利就是剥削。
They don’t understand leverage, capital, or transactions, always thinking that “making money through buying and selling is immoral” and that price differences and arbitrage are exploitation.

但他们又渴望发财。
But they also desire to get rich.

所以很多男人表面在创业，实际上不过是换个方式打工。
So many men appear to be starting businesses on the surface, but in reality, they are just working in a different way.

他们有一个永恒的问题，就是“我辛辛苦苦，为什么赚不到钱？”
They have an eternal question: “Why can’t I make money despite working so hard?”

这就是农民式的困惑。
This is the farmer-like confusion.

再比如职场关系。
Take workplace relationships, for example.

农民属性的人，讲究“人好，话少，干活多”。
People with a farmer-like nature emphasize “be good, speak less, work more.”

他们把自己活成一个老黄牛，拼命干，拼命忍。
They live like a workhorse, working hard and enduring everything.

他们不懂资源交换，不懂利益置换，不懂包装和传播，更不会主动制造合作关系，只会等机会找上门。
They don’t understand resource exchange, benefit substitution, packaging, or promotion, nor can they actively create cooperative relationships—only waiting for opportunities to come knocking.

结果就是，老实人永远在背锅，机会永远在别人手里。
The result is that honest people are always left holding the bag, while opportunities are always in someone else’s hands.

婚姻里也是一样。
It’s the same in marriage.

农民属性的男人，喜欢实打实的付出。
Men with a farmer’s attributes, they like tangible efforts.

我给你买房，我养家糊口，我对你好。
I’ll buy you a house, I’ll support the family, I’ll be good to you.

但他们不懂情绪价值，不懂博弈，不懂婚姻的本质是长期利益捆绑。
But they don’t understand emotional value, they don’t understand the game, they don’t understand that the essence of marriage is a long-term interest binding.

他们以为感情是靠付出换来的，但其实感情是筹码和势能决定的。
They think emotions are earned through effort, but in reality, emotions are determined by chips and momentum.

所以很多男人，在婚姻里变得被动，付出一切，到最后换来的是“我对你这么好，你怎么还是走了？”
So many men become passive in marriage, giving everything, only to end up with “I’ve been so good to you, why did you still leave?”

于是，尽管满大街都是女人，哪哪都是女人，可是你就是找不到，留不住。
Thus, even though there are women everywhere, on every street, you just can’t find or keep them.

在生活决策中，这种属性差距也很明显。
This attribute gap is also very evident in life decisions.

农民属性的人，喜欢攒钱，不喜欢投资。
People with a farmer’s attributes like to save money and dislike investing.

赚了钱第一反应是存起来，买房买车，搞所谓的“保值”。
The first reaction to making money is to save it, buy houses and cars, and pursue so-called “appreciation.”

从来不想我怎么用钱换时间，用时间换机会，用机会获得新一轮利差。
They never think about how to use money to exchange for time, use time to exchange for opportunities, and use opportunities to gain new rounds of profit margins.

他们害怕流动，害怕风险，害怕不确定。
They fear liquidity, fear risk, fear uncertainty.

但问题是：这个时代，最大的风险，恰恰是不动。
But the problem is: In this era, the biggest risk is precisely stagnation.

阶层跃迁，就是对不同人的属性筛选。
Social mobility is the attribute filtering of different people.

农民属性的人，是“线性成长”：干一年，涨一点工资。
People with the attribute of farmers have “linear growth”: earn a bit more salary after working a year.

干十年，升一级职称。
After working ten years, they get promoted to a higher professional title.

商人属性的人，是“非线性跃迁”：洞察局势，放大杠杆，玩资源置换，短时间翻盘。
People with the attribute of merchants have “non-linear leaps”: gain insights into the situation, amplify leverage, play resource exchanges, and turn the table in a short time.

这是两种完全不同的生命轨迹。
These are two completely different life trajectories.

你再看那些真正掌握财富和权力的人，从来都不是靠辛苦干活走出来的。
If you look at those who truly 掌握 wealth and power, they never succeed through hard work.

他们玩的是势能，是结构，是流转。
They play with potential energy, with structure, with flow.

钱从别人手里流过来，关系从别人嘴里传出来，机会是自己制造的，而不是天上掉的。
Money flows from others’ hands, relationships spread from others’ mouths, and opportunities are manufactured by oneself, not dropped from the sky.

为什么大多数中国男人没有这个能力？
Why do most Chinese men lack this ability?

因为农民基因太重了。
Because their farming genes are too strong.

我们是农业文明的后代。
We are descendants of an agricultural civilization.

种了几千年的地，思维里根植的，是土地、是守成、是积累、是防御。
Having farmed for thousands of years, the mindset rooted in us is about land, conserving, accumulating, and defending.

而不是流通，不是博弈，不是制造局面，不是吃别人溢价。
Instead of circulation, not about competition, not about creating situations, not about profiting from others’ premiums.

所以你会发现，很多男人活得很辛苦，但一辈子其实都在给别人做嫁衣。
So you’ll find that many men live very hard, but their entire lives are actually making clothes for others.

有些人做到高管了，做了老板了，心态还是农民。
Some people become executives, become bosses, but their mindset is still that of a farmer.

喜欢固守，不敢流转；喜欢付出，不敢索取；喜欢按部就班，不敢取巧出奇。
They like to stick to their ways, afraid to move; they like to give, afraid to take; they like to follow the rules, afraid to take shortcuts or be unconventional.

结果就是——累死自己，便宜了别人。
The result is—exhausting oneself while benefiting others.

这不是个体的问题，是整体文化的底色。
This is not an individual issue, but the underlying tone of the entire culture.

农民属性，决定了大多数男人只能在社会里做棋子。
The farmer attribute determines that most men can only be pawns in society.

商人属性，才能让一个人坐上棋局，布势，收割。
The merchant attribute is what allows a person to sit at the head of the game, set the strategy, and reap the rewards.

真正的商人思维，是： 不做苦力，做杠杆。
The true merchant mindset is: Don’t do manual labor, use leverage.

不等机会，造机会。
Don’t wait for opportunities, create opportunities.

不求稳定，求流通。
Don’t seek stability, seek circulation.

不问公平，问控制。
Don’t ask about fairness, ask about control.

不想努力，想套利。
Don’t want to work hard, want to arbitrage.

这就是为什么，商人属性的男人，永远是少数。
That’s why, men with a merchant personality are always a minority.

而农民属性的男人，永远是多数。
And men with a farmer personality are always the majority.

这是现实。
This is reality.

也是局限。
It is also a limitation.

但更是时代与阶层的分水岭。 #认知觉醒 #思维格局 #自我成长#讨论
But it is more a watershed of the era and class. #CognitiveAwakening #ThinkingFramework #SelfGrowth#Discussion

街机斗争与女权 2026-01-12 阅读需要6分钟 本文依旧是不在梅边在柳边同志授权提供的文章🥰
Arcade Struggle and Feminism 2026-01-12 Reading takes 6 minutes This article is still authorized by Comrade Not on Plum Branch but on Willow Branch 🥰

性别问题的实质其实是阶级矛盾，阶级矛盾是一切的主要矛盾，资产阶级并不会管你是男还是女的就不剥削你，如今的性别矛盾问题，骂战，都是资产阶级转移阶级矛盾的一把好手，事实上，底层的女性服务员，生活真的过得很好吗？
The essence of gender issues is actually class contradiction. Class contradiction is the main contradiction. The bourgeoisie will not exploit you whether you are male or female. Today’s gender contradiction issues, flame wars, are all good tools for the bourgeoisie to divert class contradictions. In fact, do the lower-class female waitresses really live a good life?

完全不见得，男快递员外卖员，女外卖员快递员，都同样如此，这就更加印证了资产阶级作为统治阶级转移矛盾剥削无产阶级的事实，所以，无产阶级必须组织团结起来，推翻资产阶级专政，要夺权！在无产阶级专政下，才能真正的很好解决性别矛盾，解放女性。
It’s far from the case. Male couriers and delivery drivers, female delivery drivers and couriers, are all the same. This further confirms the fact that the bourgeoisie, as the ruling class, shifts contradictions and exploits the proletariat. Therefore, the proletariat must organize and unite to overthrow bourgeois rule and seize power! Only under the dictatorship of the proletariat can gender contradictions be truly and effectively resolved, and women be liberated.

主要矛盾是阶级矛盾，次要矛盾是性别矛盾，我们承认存在性别矛盾，但他的存在也是出于阶级压迫，广大劳动者无权的状态，性别矛盾背后还是生存问题，解决办法只有无产阶级革命，进行夺权。
The main contradiction is the class contradiction, and the secondary contradiction is the gender contradiction. We acknowledge the existence of gender contradictions, but their existence also stems from class oppression and the state of powerlessness among the broad laborers. Behind gender contradictions are still issues of survival, and the only solution is the proletarian revolution and the seizure of power.

在目前的互联网环境下，关于“女权”的讨论是一种新型的“政治正确”，一位男性高调抨击“女权”以及背后的引申或者一位女性追求“女权”都是获取流量的绝佳的方法。可以毫不夸张的说，如果一个男性说自己支持女权或者是一个女性说自己反对“女权”，那么就会被庞大的舆论冲击，甚至被打上“背叛”所谓性别的烙印。
In the current internet environment, discussions about “feminism” are a new form of “political correctness.” It’s an excellent way to gain attention whether a man loudly criticizes “feminism” and its implications or a woman pursues “feminism.” It’s no exaggeration to say that if a man claims to support feminism or a woman claims to oppose it, they will be subjected to massive public opinion pressure and even branded with the mark of “betrayal” of their supposed gender.

我们当然可以说一切的矛盾归根结底还是阶级矛盾。但是直接说出这段话未免有些不负责任，那么笔者就会较为详细的分析推理。目前男性们的焦点便是聚焦在彩礼，并且结婚需要有车有房等等，同时部分女性要求男方婚后过户，更不要说其他的“卖身契“。
Of course, we can say that all contradictions ultimately stem from class contradictions. But to state this directly would be irresponsible. Therefore, the author will provide a more detailed analysis and reasoning. Currently, the focus of men is on betrothal gifts, and the need for cars and houses when marrying. Meanwhile, some women demand that husbands transfer property after marriage, let alone other forms of “selling one’s body.”

于是有人便说：“这不是妥妥的‘性别矛盾’嘛？”诚然，虽然其中出现了性别，但是这并不代表这是性别矛盾，相反这正是阶级矛盾的具体体现。我们可以从中窥伺，一个打着女权的“女拳”分子究竟是为什么这么做。我们可以毫不犹豫地说出她是要当一个宠物狗，当一个男性的依附品，是想脱离生产，直接当一个坐享其成的人。
So someone said, “Isn’t this a clear case of ‘gender contradiction’?” Indeed, although gender is involved, this doesn’t necessarily mean it’s a gender contradiction; on the contrary, it is a concrete manifestation of class contradiction. We can infer from this why a “feminist” who claims to be fighting for women’s rights is doing this. We can confidently say that she wants to be a pet dog, an appendage of a man, and wants to escape productive labor, directly becoming a leech who lives off others.

如果按照这个逻辑，我们不难看出，这些“女权”分子正是打着抛弃女性主观能动性，让女性直接主动脱离参与社会劳动的权力，是号召女性当男性的一件物品。这正是资产阶级对待女性的态度。而资产阶级是整个人类社会的寄生虫，蛀虫。
Following this logic, it’s not hard to see that these “feminist” groups are advocating for discarding women’s subjective agency, urging them to actively withdraw from participating in social labor, essentially treating women as mere objects for men. This is precisely the attitude of the bourgeoisie toward women. And the bourgeoisie is a parasite, a worm in the entire human society.

那么这些“女权”便是想当寄生虫的寄生虫！她们是在号召，呼吁无产阶级伟大的妇女同志们去学习资产阶级的那一套寄生虫理论，这一套恶毒的理论不仅是在虚构一个不存在的东西—女性用身体换得阶级跃迁的机会，如同改良机会主义分子一样。
So these “feminists” want to be parasites of parasites! They are calling on the great women comrades of the proletariat to learn the bourgeoisie’s parasitic theory, a vicious theory that not only fabricates something non-existent—the idea that women can trade their bodies for class mobility, akin to 改良机会主义分子.

而且这群“女权”分子的毒害在于她们将所有的火力对准了无产阶级的男性同胞们，同时对待无产阶级的其他女性同胞，她们也不会流露出过多的友善，相反，她们对待资产阶级的男性那可是谄媚至极，这群“女权”分子被消费主义洗脑，为了购买一些奢侈品，甚至不惜主动的委身资产阶级的男性。她们消费的，获取的正是资产阶级男性剥削无产阶级的剩余价值，她们在捍卫自己寄生虫的权力，甚至其捍卫力度远超资产阶级维护自己统治的力度。
Moreover, the poison of these “feminist” groups lies in their directing all their venom at the male comrades of the proletariat. At the same time, they show little kindness to other female comrades of the proletariat. Instead, they are utterly subservient to the bourgeoisie’s men. These “feminist” groups are brainwashed by consumerism, even going so far as to willingly submit to bourgeoisie’s men just to buy some luxury goods. What they consume and obtain is precisely the surplus value exploited by the bourgeoisie from the proletariat. They are defending their own rights as parasites, and their defense goes far beyond the bourgeoisie’s efforts to maintain their own rule.

因此，无产阶级看到这种资产阶级女权分子，自然是会有生理性厌恶，于是就有了如今互联网的乱象。我们举一反三，看看日本这个国家的历史。
Therefore, the working class naturally feels physiological disgust towards these bourgeois feminists, which is why we see the current chaos on the internet. Let’s draw broader lessons and look at the history of Japan.

日本的泡沫经济危机之前，平成年间，快速的经济提高不仅极大的带动了日本的方方面面，同时资本主义也是发展迅猛，这些资产阶级女权便瞅准了这个机会，鼓励各个懵懂无知的少女们去当寄生虫，于是诞生出了四个钱包理论，人们称之为恋爱资本主义。
Before the bubble economy crisis in Japan, during the Heisei era, rapid economic growth not only greatly boosted every aspect of Japan but also saw swift development of capitalism. These bourgeois feminists seized the opportunity to encourage naive and ignorant girls to become parasites, giving rise to the “four wallets theory,” which people called “romantic capitalism.”

而在后续的时间里，消费主义横行，而女性的购买欲望相较于男性有较大的差别，于是资本家们一边塑造着焦虑一边“赞美”。当然，在资产阶级女权的过分搅局之后，无产阶级的男性同胞们产生厌恶之情是一件无可厚非的事情，但是慢慢的各位男同志们便出现了扩大化的现象，孔老二，裹脚，女性出门裹黑布，女性不得上学，凡是有女的出现的事情便是错误的，各种极端保守思潮逐渐出现，因此我们要严厉抨击。
In the following years, consumerism ran rampant, and women’s purchasing desires differed greatly from those of men. Capitalists, on one hand, created anxiety while “praising” it. Of course, after the excessive interference of bourgeois feminists, it is only natural for working-class men to feel disgust. However, gradually, male comrades began to exhibit an exaggerated phenomenon. Confucius, foot-binding, women covering their heads when going out, women not being allowed to attend school—anything involving women was deemed wrong. Extreme conservative thoughts gradually emerged, and we must harshly criticize them.

究竟是男性侵犯女性次数多还是女性侵犯男性多？究竟是女性受到的压迫多还是男性受到的压迫多？显然女性仍然是较为弱势的群体，因此担心一点也无可厚非，而以多数成员为男性的资产阶级一边坐享着无产阶级男性和女性的剩余劳动价值，一边通过所谓的性别问题去转移阶级矛盾，将阶级矛盾转变为阶级内部矛盾。所以当今社会所谓的“性别矛盾”其实是被掩盖了的生产关系已经不适应发展生产力的矛盾，是无产阶级和资产阶级的残酷的阶级矛盾。
Is it men who 侵犯 women more often or women who 侵犯 men more often? Is it women who suffer more oppression or men who suffer more oppression? Clearly, women are still a relatively 弱势 group, so it is understandable to be concerned. Meanwhile, the majority-member-of-men bourgeois class enjoys the surplus labor value of both working-class men and women while diverting class contradictions through so-called gender issues, turning class contradictions into internal class contradictions. So, the so-called “gender conflict” in today’s society is actually the contradiction of production relations that no longer suit the development of productive forces, which is the brutal class contradiction between the working class and the bourgeoisie.

所以女性应该如何解放？女性的压迫是受父权制和私有制的双重压迫，这注定是一个漫长的解放道路，但是有一点我们可以知道，那就是推翻资产阶级，性别压迫也会随着阶级压迫消灭而消失。
So how should women liberate themselves? Women’s oppression is subjected to dual oppression by patriarchy and private ownership, which makes it a destined long path to liberation. However, there is one thing we can know: overthrowing the bourgeoisie will also eliminate gender oppression along with class oppression.

我的人民史观 2025-12-30 阅读需要8分钟 对于历史爱好者们而言，“历史”这个话题有着太多魅力，足以反复琢磨。东方也好，西方也罢，无论是波澜壮阔的故事，还是合久必分、分久必合的潮流，都能使人陶醉于史书当中。既然谈论到历史，就不得不提到史观。有着什么样的史观，就能直接或间接地影响到一个人对于历史时期、事件、人物的评价，从而决定着我们到底能从学习历史中获得多少东西。
My People’s Historical View 2025-12-30 Reading takes 8 minutes For history enthusiasts, the topic of “history” holds immense charm, enough to be pondered over and over. Whether it’s the dramatic stories of the East or the West, or the cycles of division and reintegration, they can all immerse one in the pages of history books. Since we are talking about history, we must mention historical perspectives. What kind of historical perspective one has can directly or indirectly affect their evaluation of historical periods, events, and figures, thereby determining how much we can gain from learning history.

“人民史观”一词可追溯到英国马克思主义者阿瑟 · 莱斯利 · 莫尔顿在20世纪30年代所著的《人民的英国史》。莫尔顿坚定地用人民的立场来分析英国历史，分析英国封建主义、资本主义社会时期各种历史大事件中所包含的“阶级斗争”因素。以人民追求平等公正的过程为主线，总结历史上人民的进与退，是人民史观的重要内容。
The term “People’s Historical View” can be traced back to Arthur Leslie Morton, a British Marxist, who wrote “The People’s History of England” in the 1930s. Morton firmly analyzed English history from the perspective of the people, examining the “class struggle” elements in various major historical events during the feudal and capitalist periods of England. Summarizing the advances and retreats of the people in their pursuit of equality and justice is a key component of the People’s Historical View.

一、关于谁的历史
I. Whose History

历史是由谁书写的？教员曾说过，“人民，只有人民，才是创造世界历史的动力。”（《论联合政府》）这是激荡时代的强音，体现人民史观并宣称只有人民才是历史的主人。与之相对的，则是以帝王将相为主要叙述对象的古代史书。在那样的历史体系之下，人们写进史书的主要是王侯公卿、达官显贵，人们关注的对象也只能是王侯公卿、达官显贵；在某些分裂动乱的时代，的确有不少底层的豪杰活跃在史册上，但这些人要么是失败后被遗忘，如秦末之陈胜，要么是成功后成为新的帝王将相，如元末之朱元璋。
Who writes history? The instructor once said, “The people, only the people, are the motive force of creating world history” (“On the United Government”). This was the powerful voice of an era, reflecting the people’s view of history and claiming that only the people are the masters of history. In contrast, ancient history books primarily narrated the lives of emperors, kings, and high officials. Under such a historical system, the main figures recorded in history were only the princes, dukes, high-ranking officials, and noble elites, and the focus could only be on them. In certain times of division and turmoil, indeed, many heroes from the lower strata were active in the historical records, but these people were either forgotten after failure, like Chen Sheng at the end of the Qin Dynasty, or became new emperors and high officials after success, like Zhu Yuanzhang at the end of the Yuan Dynasty.

如一艘大船在乘风破浪时，总少不了全体船员的努力，但人们关注的更多是船长的爱恨情仇，普普通通的水手们向来不被重视。这种模式占据着人类社会的绝大多数时期，并且它依然在如今发挥着自己的影响力——它向人们蛊惑着历史只能由胜利者来书写。
Like a large ship sailing through storms, the efforts of all crew members are essential, but people are more focused on the captain’s love and hate, while ordinary sailors have always been overlooked. This pattern has dominated most of human history and still exerts its influence today—it convinces people that history can only be written by the victors.

三千年前，历史由胜利者书写。
Three thousand years ago, history was written by the victors.

两千年前，历史由胜利者书写。
Two thousand years ago, history was written by the victors.

一千年前，历史由胜利者书写。
A thousand years ago, history was written by the victors.

五百年前，历史由胜利者书写。
Five hundred years ago, history was written by the victors.

窃钩者诛，窃国者侯。贫无置锥，贵贱有序。孔子之所谓礼乐，马克思之所谓史前史，是为“旧时代”。可以说，旧时代是容不下人民史观的，人民史观对旧时代也当然没有丝毫的留恋！
Those who steal hooks are executed, while those who steal nations are ennobled. The poor have no place to put a needle, and the hierarchy of wealth and status is well-ordered. The rituals and music spoken of by Confucius, and the prehistory described by Marx, are known as the “Old Age.” It can be said that the Old Age could not accommodate the people’s history view, and the people’s history view had no slightest attachment to the Old Age!

总而言之，人民史观的分析对象是关于人民的历史，人民史观要求我们不受以往那些胜利者们的诱导，对于这个史观而言，历史的主人是且只能是人民。
In summary, the object of analysis for the people’s history view is the history of the people. The people’s history view requires us not to be misled by those past victors. For this view of history, the 主人 of history is and can only be the people.

二、用于谁的历史
II. For Whom Is History Used

历史本就是人民创造的，但成果却被胜利者们窃取。无论是封建地主还是资本家，都通过对生产资料的掌握来奴役人民。因此，被他们书写后的历史，到处遍布着对强权的顶礼膜拜和对不公的若无其事。英雄史观便脱胎于此。
History is indeed created by the people, but the fruits of their labor are stolen by the victors. Whether it be feudal landlords or capitalists, they enslave the people by controlling the means of production. Therefore, history written by them is filled with worship of power and indifference to injustice. The hero-centric view of history originates from this.

人民史观与英雄史观天然对立。胜利者们只想操控历史，让历史为自己所用（如崔杼弑君故事）。既然过去（主要指古代）的历史大多是由胜利者们书写的，这样的历史自然也与人民的历史对立。
The people’s view of history is naturally opposed to the hero-centric view. The victors only wish to manipulate history for their own use (such as the story of Cui Zhu assassinating the king). Since most history from the past (primarily ancient times) was written by the victors, such history naturally stands in opposition to the people’s history.

那么，人民是不是该与古代史彻底决裂，不再学习那些帝王将相的史诗呢？
So, should the people completely break away from ancient history, no longer studying the epic tales of emperors, kings, and generals?

不必如此。人民史观并不一味地抛弃过去的历史，而是要从中看出由落后向进步演变的过程。政治制度的变化、权力斗争的规律、不同时代的民众生活状况精神面貌乃至各个时期的文学艺术都可以是研究对象。也就是说，如今的人民完全可以学习掌握过去的历史，从而运用这些知识来分析古今。在这里，我想给出两个浅陋的建议。
It doesn’t have to be this way. The people’s historical perspective does not simply discard past history but aims to reveal the process of evolution from backwardness to progress. Changes in political systems, the laws of power struggles, the living conditions and spiritual outlook of the people in different eras, as well as literature and art of each period, can all be subjects of study. In other words, people today can fully learn and master the past history, using this knowledge to analyze both the past and the present. Here, I would like to offer two modest suggestions.

对于过去，首先应该摒弃对任何英雄人物的幻想，帝王将相的传说终究与广大人民群众无缘，而那些的确先进、伟大的人物也希望人民自己当家做主。可以客观地看待过去那些政治家们的得失，但不宜沉湎于他们的功绩，以至于让自己与现实隔绝。秦皇汉武，唐宗宋祖，确实有风流豪迈的一面，但他们毕竟是出于自身目的而书写历史的胜利者，而人民需要的是可以为自己所用的历史。广大人民群众不必幻想成为他们，人民本身便是主人。
Regarding the past, one should first discard any fantasies about any heroic figures. The legends of emperors and generals are ultimately unrelated to the broad masses of the people, and indeed advanced and great figures also hope for the people to govern themselves. One can objectively view the gains and losses of past politicians, but it is not advisable to become immersed in their achievements to the point of disconnecting oneself from reality. Qin Shi Huang and Han Wudi, the Tang and Song emperors, certainly had a side of elegance and boldness, but they were ultimately victors who wrote history for their own purposes, while the people need history that can be used for their own benefit. The broad masses of the people should not fantasize about becoming like them; the people themselves are the masters.

对于当下，则更不应该用落后的历史观去看待现代政治家们了。何为落后？何为先进？只把焦点聚集在一两个领袖身上，盲目地妄想并代入他们的情感，就是落后；把焦点聚集在广大人民群众身上，考虑大多数人的安危存亡，便为先进。在俄乌战争中，不少人充当看客，对普京“大帝”的决断趋之若鹜，好像他的情感就是他们自己的情感、他的利益就是他们自己的利益一样——对于战争中受苦受难的群众则避而不谈。这是英雄史观的后遗症，是缺乏人民史观的体现，断不可取。
Regarding the present, one should even less use a backward historical perspective to view modern politicians. What is backward? What is advanced? Focusing solely on one or two leaders, blindly wishing to imagine and identify with their emotions, is backward; focusing on the broad masses of the people and considering the safety and well-being of the majority is advanced. In the Russia-Ukraine war, many people acted as onlookers, fawning over Putin’s “greatness” and his decisions, as if his emotions were their own and his interests were their own—while avoiding mention of the suffering of the people caught in the war. This is the aftereffect of the heroic historical perspective, an 体现 of lacking the people’s historical perspective, and something that must not be adopted.

不同人获得历史知识后的效果是不一样的，能不能破旧立新，主要还是看有没有人民立场。
The effects of obtaining historical knowledge differ for different people. Whether one can break old conventions and establish new ones mainly depends on whether one has a people’s stance.

1

三、利于谁的历史

当然，胜利者们也不是没有惧怕的时候。近现代以来，人民开始慢慢意识到应该保卫自己的劳动成果了，在斗争中，人民追求平等和公正，并要求由自己来书写历史。
Of course, the victors are not without their fears. Since modern times, people have gradually become aware of the need to defend their labor achievements. In struggles, people pursue equality and justice, and demand that they themselves write history.

人民史观并不是空穴来风的口号，启蒙运动中的资产阶级民主平等思想是它的先驱；工人阶级的出现、民权运动的开展是它的根基；马克思主义使其逐渐成熟。
The people’s history perspective is not an empty slogan; the bourgeois democratic and equalitarian ideas of the Enlightenment were its forerunner; the emergence of the working class and the development of civil rights movements were its foundation; Marxism helped it mature gradually.

人民史观要求我们从旧的事物中看出新的观点，莫尔顿把社会主义的发展看作英国人民斗争的最大成果，并从封建社会历史、资本主义社会历史中看出人民运动与社会主义发展的联系，便是一个范例。
The people’s history perspective requires us to see new perspectives in old things. Morton viewed the development of socialism as the greatest achievement of the British people’s struggles, and saw the connection between people’s movements and the development of socialism in the history of feudal society and capitalist society, which serves as an example.

从横向的角度看，人民似乎总在各个不同的历史阶段进行着相同的挣扎，历史仿佛永远只偏好少数人，这也使得那些王侯将相们显得格外珍贵、抢手。但从纵向的角度看，新的事物却总是在不断产生并发展：从封建社会到资本主义社会，上层统治阶级的嘴脸从神秘莫测到成为民众的谈资笑料；获得信息能力的提高、教育的普及都在壮大着人民对于历史进程的影响力。生产力无情地继续发展，社会也无情地日益革新，历史的进程终究会碾碎不适于新时代的事物。
From a horizontal perspective, it seems that people are always struggling in the same way in different historical stages. History seems to always favor the few, which makes those nobles and high officials particularly valuable and sought after. But from a vertical perspective, new things are constantly emerging and developing: from feudal society to capitalist society, the appearance of the ruling class has gone from mysterious to becoming the subject of ridicule among the people; the improvement of information access and the spread of education are all strengthening the influence of the people on the historical process. Productivity continues to develop mercilessly, and society continues to innovate relentlessly; the process of history will ultimately crush things that are no longer suitable for the new era.

因此，是时候告别腐朽落后的史观了，是时候铲除无能的幻想了。
Therefore, it is time to bid farewell to the decaying and backward historical perspective, and it is time to eliminate the fantasies of incompetence.

是的，历史曾经偏爱那些帝王将相们，但历史毕竟无情，它的想法随着新思潮而变动，它不会永远地眷恋任何一位来自旧时代的情人。也许对自由王国的向往过于理想，但我们至少能够确定历史的发展规律是利于人民的。
Yes, history has favored the emperors, kings, and generals, but history is ultimately merciless. Its ideas change with new trends, and it will not eternally favor any lover from the old era. Perhaps the yearning for a free kingdom is too idealistic, but we can at least be certain that the laws of historical development are favorable to the people.

尾声
Epilogue

在那些漫长而混沌的岁月中，人民几乎为历史的进程付出了全部，连他们的功绩和荣誉也被少数人占有。身处现代社会的我们可以欣赏帝王将相们的英姿，但若一心匍匐跪拜，眼里全无人民，就将被时代所诅咒，成为幼稚、落后的历史爱好者。
In those long and chaotic years, the people have almost paid everything for the progress of history, even their achievements and honors were claimed by a few. We, who live in modern society, can admire the heroism of the emperors and generals, but if we kneel down in devotion, with no regard for the people, we will be cursed by the times and become naive and backward lovers of history.

真正成熟的人民并不会逃避自己那不堪的历史。是，人民长期被奴役，哪怕是经过各种斗争后也依然在艰苦地挣扎着。但人民群众这一历史的真正主人已经吃过了把自己的权利拱手让人的教训，有太多太多历史教训，也有太多太多科学的理论号召着他们继续成长。
Truly mature people do not shy away from their miserable history. Yes, the people have long been enslaved, and even after various struggles, they still struggle hard. But the true masters of this history of the masses have learned the lesson of handing over their rights to others, with too many historical lessons and too many scientific theories urging them to continue growing.

也就是说，人民无时无刻不在忍耐权利被剥夺的苦难，也无时无刻不在斗争、成长。直到把毒蛇猛兽消灭干净，还要再把它们的巢穴捣毁得更加彻底！
In other words, the people are enduring the suffering of their rights being stripped away every moment, and they are also struggling and growing every moment. Until the venomous snakes and fierce beasts are completely eliminated, their dens must be destroyed even more thoroughly!

旧的历史将被新的历史所替代，而理念革新后的史书上必然有着关于人民的浓墨重彩！
Old history will be replaced by new history, and the history books after the renewal of ideas will certainly have a strong focus on the people!

阶层复制：一个高校老师看见的精英家庭教育 2026-01-20 阅读需要26分钟 撰文｜陈晓妍
Class Replication: An Elite Family Education Seen by a University Professor 2026-01-20 Reading takes 26 minutes Written by | Chen Xiaoyan

青年教师姜以琳用7年的时间，访谈跟踪了28名来自排名北京前十中学的学生，受访者无一不是精英家庭。这些孩子们有着相似的成长轨迹：从顶尖中学进入世界一流大学，毕业后在大型跨国公司工作或创业，成为未来的世界英才。
Young teacher Jiang Yilin spent 7 years interviewing and tracking 28 students from the top 10 high schools in Beijing, none of whom came from ordinary families. These children had similar growth trajectories: from top high schools to world-class universities, and after graduation, working in large multinational companies or starting their own businesses, becoming future global talents.

在调研的基础上，姜以琳发表了著作《学神：中国精英教育现场一手观察》，她发现，教育是一场争夺未来社会位置的纸牌竞技，精英家庭的孩子们几乎注定赢得这场游戏。
Based on her research, Jiang Yilin published the book “Genius: Firsthand Observations of Elite Education in China,” where she found that education is a card game of competing for future social positions, and children from elite families are almost destined to win this game.

01 天才基地
01 Genius Base

地理课堂上一阵骚动。老师在讲一道关于“厦深铁路是如何修建的”考试题目，她跟学生解释，铁路轨道之所以往内陆移动，出于军事安全考虑。
A commotion broke out in the geography class. The teacher was explaining an exam question about “How was the Xiamen-Shenzhen Railway built,” and she explained to the students that the railway tracks moved inland for military security reasons.

“这个解释太牵强了，”一个坐在教室前排，戴着黑框眼镜的男生大声打断老师：“它只往里移动了一公里。”
“ This explanation is too far-fetched,” a boy wearing black-rimmed glasses, sitting in the front row of the classroom, interrupted the teacher loudly: “It only moved one kilometer inward.”

“应该像另外一条铁路一样，移动得更远。”另一个女孩附和。
“ It should move further, like the other railway line,” another girl chimed in.

老师还想说点什么，没等开口，坐在教室最里面的学生大鹏抬起头打断她：“让我来吧，我可以解释得更清楚。” 老师愣了一下，有点不知所措，随后放下手中的粉笔。
The teacher wanted to say something more, but before she could open her mouth, Da Peng, who was sitting in the back row of the classroom, raised his head and interrupted her: “Let me. I can explain it more clearly.” The teacher was taken aback for a moment, a bit lost, and then put down the chalk in her hand.

同学们都安静地盯着大鹏。他起身走到黑板前，毫不客气地擦掉地理老师写的内容，就像一位老师在否定学生的错误答案。大鹏随即画了一张海岸线地图，给同学们讲课：“这条铁路很早就设计好了，但在开始修建之前，其他相交的铁路就已经建成了…..其实是社会经济原因导致地铁建设的变化。”
The classmates all quietly stared at Da Peng. He stood up, walked to the blackboard, and without hesitation, wiped away what the geography teacher had written, just like a teacher negating a student’s wrong answer. Da Peng then drew a coastline map and lectured to the classmates: “This railway line was designed long ago, but before construction began, the intersecting railways had already been built… It’s actually due to socio-economic reasons that led to the changes in subway construction.”

地理老师绷着脸，面无表情但看上去有点紧张。她无奈点了点头，用英语说了句谢谢。
The geography teacher had a stern face, expressionless but slightly nervous. She nodded helplessly and said “Thank you” in English.

图片描述
Image Description

图 | 一所中学的教室内部
Fig | Interior of a middle school classroom

坐在大鹏座位后的学者姜以琳，在笔记本上记录了这个学生挑战老师的瞬间。这一幕发生在2013年，一所位于北京西郊的中学里。这是北京市排名前十的知名高中。姜以琳是上海纽约大学社会学专业助理教授。从2012到2019年，姜以琳用七年的时间，对28名学生进行了七年的跟踪调查。和大鹏一样，他们分别来自五所北京排名前十的中学，家庭富裕。
Jiang Yilin, a scholar sitting behind Da Peng’s seat, recorded this moment when the student challenged the teacher in her notebook. This scene took place in 2013, in a middle school located in the western suburbs of Beijing. It is a well-known high school ranked among the top ten in Beijing. Jiang Yilin is an assistant professor of sociology at NYU Shanghai. From 2012 to 2019, Jiang Yilin conducted a seven-year tracking survey on 28 students over seven years. Like Da Peng, they came from five of Beijing’s top ten middle schools and came from wealthy families.

姜以琳在著作 《Study Gods: How the New Chinese Elite Prepare for Global Competition》（《学神：中国精英教育现场一手观察》）中，记录了他们相似的成长轨迹：从顶尖中学进入世界一流大学，毕业后在大型跨国公司工作或创业，成为未来的世界精英。
Jiang Yilin, in her book “Study Gods: How the New Chinese Elite Prepare for Global Competition” (“学神：中国精英教育现场一手观察”), records their similar growth trajectories: from top high schools to world-class universities, then working in large multinational companies or starting their own businesses after graduation, becoming the future world elite.

如何描述这些学生？天才、聪明，是姜以琳听到过频次最高的词汇。
How would you describe these students? Genius, smart, these are the most frequently heard words Jiang Yilin has encountered.

一位中学老师笑着跟姜以琳解释大鹏的这类行为：“我们的学生非常聪明，他们会在课堂上证明你是错的。”甚至有个专门的说法，叫做“把老师挂黑板上”。这种鼓励学生挑战老师的做法，在以应试教育为主的中小学教育里是罕见的。
A high school teacher smiled and explained to Jiang Yilin about Da Peng’s behavior like this: “Our students are very smart; they will prove you wrong in class.” There is even a specific term for this, called “hanging the teacher on the blackboard.” This practice of encouraging students to challenge teachers is rare in the exam-oriented primary and secondary education system.

“我们比别人优秀得多。”
“We are much better than others.”

“你们未来可以改变世界。”
“You can change the world in the future.”

“你们都有当总理的潜质。”
“You all have the potential to become Prime Minister.”

在学校里，老师常会这样告诉学生，似乎算不上表扬，只是阐述事实。做研究时，一位副校长指着路过的学生告诉姜以琳：“美国和澳大利亚的其他学校都认为我们的学生是天才。”
In school, teachers often tell students this, as if it’s not praise, but just stating a fact. While doing research, a vice principal pointed at a passing student and told Jiang Yilin, “Other schools in the United States and Australia think our students are geniuses.”

一位老师曾对着全班同学说：“我们班的平均分，应该是满分。”听到这句话时，只有姜以琳惊讶得瞪大了眼，她转头扫了一眼其他的学生，发现所有人脸上都没有表情，像是对老师的默认。
A teacher once said to the entire class, “The average score in our class should be full marks.” When she heard this, only Jiang Yilin was surprised, her eyes widening. She turned to scan the other students and found that none of them had any expression, as if they were in agreement with the teacher.

几个学生曾议论起学校里高考失利的差生，一个女孩叹了口气：“这很悲哀，但也在意料之中。”那些“差生们”上不了北大清华，也去不了外国名校，最后“只能被省重点大学录取”。
Several students once discussed the underachievers in the school who failed the college entrance exams. A girl sighed, “It’s tragic, but it was expected.” Those “underachievers” couldn’t get into Peking University or Tsinghua University, nor could they attend foreign top universities. In the end, they “could only be admitted to provincial key universities.”

在这场田野调查中，姜以琳接触了28个学生，他们全都来自高收入家庭。家庭收入的中位数，比城市收入前10%的人群，还要高出 2倍以上，比北京公务员高出四倍。当然，这还只是明面上的收入。一些有钱人家的“灰色收入”，可能比报税收入更高。他们拥有北京的户口，以及两套以上的房产。很多家长都是高学历人士，不少人还是清华北大的校友。一对夫妻中，至少有一位是企业高管或者高级技术人员。
In this field study, Jiang Yilin interviewed 28 students, all from high-income families. The median household income was more than twice that of the top 10% urban income group, and four times higher than that of Beijing civil servants. Of course, this was just the reported income. The “grey income” of some wealthy families might even be higher than their reported income. They had Beijing hukou and owned two or more properties. Many parents were highly educated individuals, and several were alumni of Peking University and Tsinghua University. In at least one couple, there was either a corporate executive or a senior technical expert.

姜以琳调研的五所中学里，有一所位于北京海淀区，每到放学时间，校门就会停满接送孩子的黑色豪车。旧时这些中学专门为政府高级官员、军队高级干部的后代服务，一个世纪过去，虽然选拔方式变成了考试成绩，但绝大部分学生依然来自富裕或有权势的家庭。刚开始，姜以琳还想在这些中学里，研究不同家庭背景学生的差异，后来她才发现几乎找不到工人或者是农民的学生。
Among the five high schools Jiang Yilin researched, one was located in Haidian District, Beijing. Every time school was over, the school gate would be filled with black luxury cars picking up children. These high schools were once exclusively for the children of senior government officials and military officers. A century later, although the selection method had changed to exam scores, the vast majority of students still came from wealthy or influential families. Initially, Jiang Yilin wanted to study the differences among students from different family backgrounds in these schools, but later she realized she could hardly find any students from working-class or farming families.

这让姜以琳想起，本科期间，她在宾夕法尼亚大学当交换生的经历。同学们大多都是美国的有钱人。有时候会听别人提起，某个同学家里是billionaire，亿万富翁，一种她根本没什么概念的财富水平。她住过美国室友家的豪华住宅，室友家的每个人都拥有一辆跑车。
This reminded Jiang Yilin of her experience as an exchange student at the University of Pennsylvania during her undergraduate studies. Most of her classmates were wealthy Americans. Sometimes, she would hear people mention that a classmate’s family was a billionaire, a level of wealth she had no concept of. She had stayed in a luxurious apartment belonging to an American roommate, and everyone in her roommate’s family owned a sports car.

姜以琳来自中国台湾一个小康家庭，父母都是当地一所研究所的工作人员，家境不差，却也算不上富裕优渥。本科毕业后，她考上芝加哥大学的一个研究所，那是需要自费的硕士学程，因为留学费用，她差点跟这所学校失之交臂。最后，掏空父母和爷爷奶奶两代人的积蓄，并动用哥哥的奖学金才勉强凑够了留学费用。
Jiang Yilin comes from a middle-class family in Taiwan, China. Both of her parents worked at a local research institute, and while her family wasn’t poor, they weren’t wealthy either. After completing her undergraduate studies, she was admitted to a self-funded master’s program at the University of Chicago. Due to the high cost of studying abroad, she almost missed out on the opportunity. In the end, she had to deplete the savings of two generations—her parents and grandparents—and use her older brother’s scholarship to barely afford the tuition fees.

作为一名社会学博士，姜以琳读过不少西方教育社会学的经典书籍。她的亲身经历和知识系统告诉她，“世界上很多名校都是这样，就算是看分数，（录取的学生）绝对都是以精英为主。”西方的著作，描写的全都是外国精英学生。但同样的故事，也发生在教育体系看似更公平的东方。
As a sociology doctoral student, Jiang Yilin has read many classic books on Western educational sociology. Her personal experiences and knowledge system tell her, “Many top universities in the world are like this; even if you look at the scores, the admitted students are absolutely elite.” Western literature describes only foreign elite students. But the same story also unfolds in Eastern education systems, which appear to be more fair.

她想用自己的研究，探寻东亚社会的答案：为什么最聪明的“天才学生”大多从有钱人家来？为何这些占据一流资源的学校，背离了用教育消弭阶层差距的传统使命，成了精英复制下一代精英的培育皿。
She wants to use her research to explore answers about East Asian societies: Why do most of the brightest “genius students” come from wealthy families? Why do these schools, which possess top resources, deviate from their traditional mission of using education to bridge class gaps and instead become incubators for replicating elite offspring.

02 没做什么的父母
02 Parents Who Did Little

早在做社科研究之前，姜以琳就隐隐感受过阶层的差异。
Long before she began her social science research, Jiang Yilin had already vaguely felt the differences in social classes.

高中时，姜以琳在台湾一所公立学校上学，学校里既有富裕人家的孩子，也有普通的工人家庭。来自高知双职工家庭的姜以琳，在学校里处于中层，卡在“台湾的有钱人”和底层工薪家庭之间。班里开家长会，姜以琳是负责登记的学生，家长签到表上，工人家庭的父母那一栏，常常是空白的。“我的爸爸妈妈随时都可以来家长会，他们的爸妈根本不可以请假。”
In high school, Jiang Yilin attended a public school in Taiwan, where students came from both wealthy families and ordinary working-class households. Coming from a family of highly educated dual-income parents, Jiang Yilin was considered middle-of-the-road in school, caught between “Taiwan’s rich” and the lower-income working-class families. During parent-teacher meetings, Jiang Yilin was in charge of registration, and the section for working-class parents on the sign-in sheet was often left blank. “My parents could attend the parent-teacher meetings anytime, but their parents could never take time off.”

姜以琳在一个知识型的家庭中长大，学习永远是优先级最高的事。不管以后挣不挣钱，读书都是根本。“就算小时候成绩不好，也从来不知道我可以不念书。”
Jiang Yilin grew up in an intellectual family where education was always the top priority. No matter how much money she made later, studying was fundamental. “Even if her grades were bad when she was young, she never knew she could have skipped school.”

她继承了父母的文化资本。大学的志愿表，是妈妈坐在沙发看着姜以琳填下去的。她会告诉女儿，这个科系跟那个科系有什么区别，哪个科系她上过课，读起来最有趣。姜以琳大学时碰到不懂的学科问题，也会直接跟妈妈讨论。
She inherited her parents’ cultural capital. Her mother sat on the sofa while filling out Jiang Yilin’s college application form, explaining the differences between various departments, which ones she had taken courses in, and which ones were the most interesting to read. When Jiang Yilin encountered academic questions in college, she would directly discuss them with her mother.

父母的社交圈子都是研究人员，姜以琳从小就在学术界耳濡目染，知道什么是学界更看重的选题，做什么研究才能拿高分。而这些，其他普通家庭的孩子很难获得。姜以琳开始意识到，每个人都站在不同的起跑线上。
Parents in her social circle were all researchers, and Jiang Yilin was exposed to academia from a young age, knowing what topics academia valued most and what kind of research could earn high scores. And these things were hard for children from ordinary families to obtain. Jiang Yilin began to realize that everyone started from different points.

而姜以琳的调研对象，这些高收入精英家庭的孩子，似乎意识不到这个问题，绝大部分学生来自相似的阶层。问及家庭是否提供了什么帮助，学生们的答案如出一辙：“父母基本没出什么力。”“考大学是自己的事，别人很难帮得上忙。”
Her research subjects, children from high-income elite families, seemed unaware of this issue, as the vast majority of students came from similar social strata. When asked if their families provided any help, the students’ answers were identical: “Parents didn’t contribute much.” “Applying to university was my own responsibility; others couldn’t really help much.”

父母们很配合地，为自己“没做过什么”而自责。比如Claire的母亲。Claire是学校里的明星学生，后来被耶鲁大学录取。她的父亲从内蒙古小村庄考到北京来，她则不负家族的期望，从北京走向世界。
The parents cooperatively blamed themselves for “not having done much,” like Claire’s mother. Claire was a star student at school and later got admitted to Yale University. Her father moved from a small village in Inner Mongolia to Beijing, and she, in turn, lived up to the family’s expectations by going global from Beijing.

Claire的母亲是一个有博士学位的医生，管理着一个助理团队。陈医生形容自己是个局外人，“什么也没为她做”，“一切都是她自己做的”。
Claire’s mother was a doctor with a PhD, managing an assistant team. Dr. Chen described herself as an outsider, “I didn’t do anything for her,” “Everything was done by herself.”

聊到一半，陈医生接到了女儿带来的电话，Claire按照学校的要求，需要制作一个大海报。陈医生安排给自己的博士生，几个人很快一起印出来一个人形大小的海报。但事后姜以琳再次问起，没人记得，也没人觉得这算什么值得说的事。
Halfway through the conversation, Dr. Chen received a call from his daughter, Claire, who needed to make a large poster according to the school’s requirements. Dr. Chen arranged for his PhD students to print a human-sized poster together. But later, when Jiang Yilin asked about it again, no one remembered, and no one thought it was worth mentioning.

Robert的爸爸郭先生，则悄悄为儿子早早铺好了留学路。他是一家企业的高管，说话温声细语。仅仅是姜以琳了解到的一项收入，每年就超过了100万。跟Claire不一样，Robert是个“学渣气质一览无遗”的孩子。在读书还是打电玩之间，他认真做了个权衡，“读书的好处是成绩变好，但打电玩心情会变好”，他得出结论，“还是心情好比较重要”。
Mr. Guo, Robert’s father, had quietly paved the way for his son’s study abroad. He was a senior executive at a company and spoke in a gentle tone. Just one of the incomes 姜以琳 learned about exceeded 1 million yuan annually. Unlike Claire, Robert was a child who “showed his lack of academic talent.” Between studying and playing video games, he made a careful weighing, “The benefit of studying is better grades, but playing video games improves mood,” he concluded, “Mood is more important.”

郭先生很早就发现这个孩子并不像他。郭先生是上世纪80年代的高材生，当年在四川全省的四十多万高考考生中，他考了前五十名。可儿子没能继承他的优势，按照Robert的成绩，他极有可能考上一所不那么知名的大学。
Mr. Guo had noticed long ago that his son was not like him. Mr. Guo was a top student in the 1980s, ranking in the top 50 among over 400,000 college entrance exam candidates in Sichuan province back then. But his son couldn’t inherit his advantage; based on Robert’s performance, he was very likely to be admitted to a less prestigious university.

郭先生早早放弃了高考，但他并没有直接安排儿子留学。作为一个金融相关行业的从业者，他还在计划里纳入了“买家心理预期”。考虑到青少年的逆反心理，孩子极有可能故意与父母作对。于是，郭先生只给他报了一个参观美国大学的暑期交流旅行，从东海岸游历到西海岸，试图勾起儿子的兴趣。果不其然，15天的旅行结束，儿子从此“一心想去美国”。
Mr. Guo had given up on the college entrance exam early on, but he didn’t directly arrange for his son to study abroad. As a professional in the finance-related industry, he also incorporated “buyer’s psychological expectations” into his plan. Considering the rebellious nature of teenagers, the child was very likely to deliberately oppose his parents. Therefore, Mr. Guo only signed him up for a summer exchange trip to visit American universities, traveling from the East Coast to the West Coast, trying to pique his son’s interest. As expected, after a 15-day trip, his son was determined to “study in the United States.”

为了让Robert认为出国留学是自己的独立选择，郭先生刚开始还要策略性地不同意，假装是被儿子说服的，尽管一切都在朝他预设的方向发展。Robert跟父亲聘请的留学中介合作，最后申请了父亲满意的华盛顿大学。
To make Robert believe that studying abroad was his independent choice, Mr. Guo had to initially strategically disagree, pretending to be convinced by his son, although everything was developing in the direction he had 预设. Robert cooperated with the study abroad counselor hired by his father and finally applied to Washington University, which his father was satisfied with.

Robert对父亲的引导浑然不觉。他总结父亲对他考大学的影响：“我和我爸讨论过大学和专业方向。”仅此而已，“他们根本帮不上什么忙。”
Robert was completely unaware of his father’s guidance. He summarized his father’s influence on his college application: “I discussed universities and majors with my dad.” That was all, “They couldn’t help much at all.”

孩子们向外人宣告家庭的退场，好像家庭的财富、地位，权力，不曾在教育上起到过关键作用。
The children declare the family’s withdrawal to outsiders, as if the family’s wealth, status, and power had never played a key role in education.

图片描述
Image Description

图 | 放学时，在中学门口等候的家长
Fig | Parents waiting outside the high school gate after school

姜以琳在书里算过一笔细账，精英家庭如果准备送孩子留学，那么他们每年的明细开支包括：国际部学费每年约九到十万、补习班两三万、私人家教每节课七八百。学生们还需要到香港或新加坡参加多达五次的考试，家长们要承担机票、酒店房间和报名费。
Jiang Yilin has calculated a detailed account in a book. For elite families preparing to send their children abroad for study, their annual detailed expenses include: international department tuition of about 900,000 to 1 million, tutoring classes of 20,000 to 30,000, and private tutoring of 700 to 800 per lesson. Students also need to take up to five exams in Hong Kong or Singapore, and parents have to bear the costs of air tickets, hotel rooms, and registration fees.

有的家长会帮子女搞定一些特殊的身份，这能在高考中加 5 分。申请外国大学，需要增加孩子的影响力，家长还会请校长写推荐信，即使校长并不认识孩子。或者将孩子的文章出版成书，让校长写序。
Some parents help their children obtain special identities, which can add 5 points to their college entrance exam scores. When applying to foreign universities, parents also need to enhance their children’s influence and may ask the principal to write a recommendation letter, even if the principal does not know the child. Alternatively, they can publish the child’s articles as books and ask the principal to write the preface.

与老师打好关系也很重要。精英中学里的老师，有些是往年高考的出题人。“三好学生”的名额也在老师们手上，能为高考增加20～30分。如果想出国，也可以拜托老师写推荐信。大牌护肤品、苹果手表，都是送给老师们的常见礼物。老师们办公室里的名贵茶叶，更是多得喝不完。精英家庭的学生们，不会因为拿不出体面的礼物而发愁。
Building good relationships with teachers is also important. Some teachers in elite high schools are the question setters for previous college entrance exams. The spots for “three good students” are also in the hands of teachers, which can add 20 to 30 points to the college entrance exam scores. If the goal is to study abroad, parents can also ask teachers to write recommendation letters. High-end skincare products and Apple Watches are common gifts for teachers. The expensive tea in the teachers’ offices is often more than they can drink. Students from elite families do not worry about not being able to afford decent gifts.

这也是姜以琳想在书里展示的一点：特权从来不以特权本来的面目出现，精英的培育方式，让这些孩子相信，自己是靠着勤奋和天赋赢得了一切。并且让未来产生的阶层分化，看上去那么地自然、合理。
This is also one point that Jiang Yilin wants to show in the book: Privilege never appears in its true form; the way elites are raised makes these children believe that they have won everything through hard work and talent. And it makes the future class division appear so natural and reasonable.

03 不容出错的交接
03 No Room for Error Handover

调研时，姜以琳发现一个有趣的现象。在很多北京精英家庭眼里，能称得上“一流”的，只有清华、北大两所大学，“连复旦他们都看不上”。
During her research, Jiang Yilin noticed an interesting phenomenon. In the eyes of many elite families in Beijing, only Tsinghua and Peking University can be considered “first-class,” and even Fudan University is looked down upon.

姜以琳在北京西郊那所中学的国际部，见到过一副巨型世界地图，在上面标出了学生们的目标——麻省理工、斯坦福、哈佛、普林斯顿、耶鲁、剑桥、牛津等16所大学。
At the international department of a high school in the western suburbs of Beijing, Jiang Yilin saw a giant world map marked with the students’ goals—their target universities included MIT, Stanford, Harvard, Princeton, Yale, Cambridge, Oxford, and 16 other universities.

这些家庭的父母都有一个共性，会鼓励孩子心无旁骛地追求最高的目标，排名靠后的不行，会导致身份地位向下流动的也不要。不为目标之外的任何事情发愁。
These parents of these families share a common trait—they encourage their children to pursue the highest goals with unwavering focus. They won’t accept anything less, and they also reject the idea of downward social mobility. They don’t worry about anything outside of the goal.

“这是一种精英的态度。”姜以琳说。她想起在国外读博时，一位来自东亚的老师也曾问过她，毕业后的规划时什么。姜以琳像大多数人一样，准备了plan A、B、C、D，分别是最好的、较次的，普通的，最差的。
“This is an elite attitude,” said Jiang Yilin. She remembered when she was pursuing her PhD abroad, a teacher from East Asia once asked her about her plans after graduation. Like most people, Jiang Yilin had prepared Plan A, B, C, and D, which were the best, the second best, the average, and the worst, respectively.

老师打断她：“你不能这样，先把B、C、D都去掉，如果A失败了，我们再来想办法。”姜以琳后来才意识到，那位博班老师，采取的就是精英式的训练方法。
The teacher interrupted her: “You can’t do that. First, get rid of B, C, and D. If A fails, we’ll figure out a solution then.” It was later that Jiang Yilin realized that the PhD supervisor was using an elite-style training method.

“什么心无旁骛，怎么可能，我超怕失败的。”姜以琳笑着说。对她而言，自从差点因为学费没法读研之后，她第一次发现，原来自己的人生没有“安全网”。稍有不慎，随时可能从轨道上脱离。
“What about unwavering focus? How is that possible, I’m terrified of failure,” Jiang Yilin said with a smile. For her, since she nearly couldn’t afford to pursue her master’s degree due to tuition fees, she had her first realization that her life didn’t have a “safety net.” A slight misstep could at any moment cause her to deviate from her path.

图片描述
Image Description

图 | 姜以琳在办公室
Figure | Jiang Yilin in the office

在姜以琳接触的精英学生身上，却看不到这种普通人的保守。普通玩家与顶级玩家之间的区别在于，如果走错一步，普通人面临出局，顶级玩家的牌面上则写着“再来一次”。
However, among the elite students Jiang Yilin has encountered, this conservatism of ordinary people is not visible. The difference between ordinary players and top players lies in that if one makes a wrong move, ordinary people face elimination, while the cards of top players are marked with “try again.”

高三那年，高材生刘浴朗遇到了大麻烦。2014年，在奥数开赛前两个月，政策突然调整，宣布奥数比赛获奖者，将不再获得高考保送资格。得知这个消息时，浴朗已经为此准备了两年，牺牲了高考复习的时间。在这种打击下，她在竞赛中失利了。
In her senior year of high school, the talented student Liu Yulan encountered a major problem. In 2014, two months before the olympiad competition, the policy was suddenly adjusted, announcing that winners of the olympiad competition would no longer be eligible for college recommendation based on their scores. When she learned this news, Yulan had already prepared for it for two years, sacrificing time that could have been spent studying for the college entrance exam. Under this blow, she failed in the competition.

浴朗付出的远不止如此。高二时，她的母亲打听到，全市最好的金牌奥数教练都在这所北京西郊的中学，她才让女儿转学过来，为她谋一个保送清华的机会。母亲的情报不会出错，她是清华大学的校友，也是一间报社的编辑。
Yulan gave far more than that. In her sophomore year of high school, her mother found out that the best 金牌奥数 coaches in the city were at this high school in the western suburbs of Beijing, and only then did she transfer her daughter there, hoping to secure a recommendation to Tsinghua University. The mother’s intelligence would not go wrong; she was an alumnus of Tsinghua University and an editor at a newspaper.

浴朗只能离开自己熟识的朋友圈，来到这所陌生中学。一开始住校时，浴朗很不习惯，天天哭着打电话回家。直到第二个月，她照常诉苦，电话那头却传来妈妈的训斥：“你够了吧？”从那个时候她就知道，不能再哭了，得自己想办法。近一年的时间里，她都没有交到过什么朋友。
Yulan had to leave her familiar circle of friends and come to this unfamiliar high school. At first, when she boarded at the school, Yulan was very unaccustomed to it and cried every day, calling home. Until the second month, when she usually complained, her mother scolded her from the other end of the phone, “Have you had enough?” From that moment, she knew she couldn’t cry anymore and had to find her own way. In nearly a year, she didn’t make any friends.

奥数竞赛失败的消息，就像一声尖锐的警鸣，促使这位母亲应声而起，投入警戒状态。连续两周，浴朗的奥数教练孙老师，每天都会接到这位母亲打来的电话，请他帮助自己的女儿。
The news of her failure in the olympiad competition was like a sharp alarm, prompting this mother to spring into action and enter a state of alertness. For two consecutive weeks, Yulan’s olympiad coach, Teacher Sun, received daily calls from this mother asking for his help with her daughter.

孙老师对这对母女没有什么好感。学奥数只是为了保送资格，在孙老师看来，这种行为太过功利。但两周过去，浴朗母亲的电话让他“完全受不了，真的快要崩溃了”。他只好透露了一个重要消息：北大为奥数落选者举办了一个冬令营，如果通过结业考试，或许可以获得加分。
Teacher Sun had little goodwill toward this mother and daughter. Studying for the olympiad was just for the sake of recommendation, and in Teacher Sun’s view, this was too utilitarian. But after two weeks, the mother’s calls had made him “completely unbearable, almost about to break down.” He had no choice but to reveal an important piece of news: Peking University was holding a winter camp for olympiad dropouts, and if she passed the graduation exam, she might be able to get extra points.

在孙老师的推荐下，浴朗参加了那个冬令营，但没有通过结业考试。情急之下，浴朗的妈妈再次联系了孙老师。孙老师又告知她一个内幕消息，两周之后，清华也办了类似的冬令营。这一次，浴朗报名并通过了结业考试，为她的高考拿下60分加分。
Under the recommendation of Teacher Sun, Yulan participated in that winter camp, but did not pass the graduation exam. In desperation, Yulan’s mother contacted Teacher Sun again. Teacher Sun then informed her of an insider tip: two weeks later, Tsinghua University would also be holding a similar winter camp. This time, Yulan registered and passed the graduation exam, earning an additional 60 points for her college entrance exam score.

后来，浴朗的高考成绩低于清华大学的分数线，但在加分之后，她还是和年轻时的母亲一样，顺利被清华大学录取。这个特殊的游戏规则，姜以琳采访的其他学生从没听说过，甚至其他奥数教练也仿佛并不知情。浴朗的妈妈，给自己的孩子打出一张出人意料的牌。
Later, Yulan’s college entrance exam score was below Tsinghua University’s cutoff, but after the added points, she was still admitted to Tsinghua University smoothly, just like her mother had when she was young. This special set of rules was unknown to the other students interviewed by Jiang Yilin, and even other olympiad coaches seemed unaware of it. Yulan’s mother played an unexpected card for her own child.

类似的经历，在另一个学生文斌身上也出现过。文斌本想本科毕业后直接申请国外的博士，却没有成功。父亲决定插手，帮儿子规划新一轮的申请。除了儿子想读的博士，他还额外申请了三所学校的硕士，作为后路。后来，文斌的申博再次失败，但这一次，他掉进了父亲提前编织好的安全网里——他的硕士通过了。两年硕士课程，花了家里七八十万。
A similar experience occurred with another student, Wen Bin. Wen Bin had originally planned to apply for a PhD abroad after completing his undergraduate studies, but was unsuccessful. His father decided to intervene, helping his son plan a new round of applications. In addition to the PhD program his son wanted, he also applied for master’s programs at three other schools as a backup. Later, Wen Bin’s PhD application failed again, but this time, he fell into the safety net his father had prepared in advance—the master’s program was approved. The two-year master’s program cost the family 七八十万 (seventy to eighty thousand).

在这个故事中，最让人诧异的是，文斌爸爸以前从未出国留过学，也不懂怎么申请国外的学校。但他却能在儿子失利时，迅速判断局势，手把手指导文斌。
The most astonishing part of this story is that Wen Bin’s father had never studied abroad and knew nothing about applying to foreign schools. Yet, he was able to quickly assess the situation when his son failed and personally guided Wen Bin step by step.

姜以琳解释，像文斌、浴朗的父母，都是报社里有编制的成员，作为受过专业训练的资深媒体人，他们有极强的信息获取能力和识读能力，擅长在海量、繁杂的信息中翻找最重要的那部分。
Jiang Yilin explained that parents like Wen Bin and Yulan are permanent staff members of the newspaper. As professionally trained senior media professionals, they possess strong information acquisition and interpretation skills, adept at finding the most important parts in vast and complex information.

文斌的爸爸还找过不少同事，他们的孩子都有出国留学的成功经验。这些人脉成了临时的智囊团。于是，在短时间内，文斌爸爸就摸清了国外入学委员会在招收学生方面的喜好。
Wen Bin’s father also consulted many colleagues whose children had successful experiences studying abroad. These connections formed an ad-hoc advisory group. As a result, within a short period, Wen Bin’s father managed to understand the preferences of the foreign admissions committee in recruiting students.

而普通人的孩子要想爬到同样的位置，“真的是需要天时地利人和，一次失足都不可以”。姜以琳访问过一名来自江西普通家庭，复旦毕业后去芝加哥大学读博的学生。在他高考之前，父母把拉煤用的煤车都准备好了，要么考上名校，要么回家拉煤。
For ordinary people’s children to reach the same position, “it really requires the right timing, circumstances, and effort, and even a single misstep is unacceptable.” Jiang Yilin visited a student from a common family in Jiangxi who went to the University of Chicago for his Ph.D. after graduating from Fudan University. Before his college entrance exams, his parents had already prepared the coal cart for hauling coal. Either he would attend a prestigious university, or he would go home to pull coal.

04 次世代的诞生
04 The Birth of the Fourth Generation

几年时间过去，姜以琳接触的学生们，都如愿过上了他们预期内的生活。
Several years have passed, and all the students Jiang Yilin has encountered have lived the lives they had envisioned.

一个女孩从牛津大学毕业后留在了英国，在好几年前，她的收入就达到了英国的前5%。阿什利毕业于剑桥大学，在瑞士一家世界上最大的制造商工作，起薪10万美金。刚待了一年后，她就跳槽到一家日本公司，工资也比以前高出不少。
One girl stayed in the UK after graduating from Oxford University. Several years ago, her income reached the top 5% in the UK. Ashley, who graduated from Cambridge University, works at one of the world’s largest manufacturers in Switzerland, starting at $100,000. After working there for just a year, she jumped to a Japanese company, where her salary was significantly higher.

另一个女孩跟姜以琳吐槽，自己找的工作起薪才14万美金，“老板根本是在剥削我！”
Another girl complained to Jiang Yilin about her job, which only paid $140,000 as a starting salary. “The boss is just exploiting me!” she said.

“什么学生刚毕业就有14万美金，还不包含红利？”姜以琳开玩笑地说，如果是刚毕业的自己，“给我个零头我就去了。”
“What kind of student gets a starting salary of $140,000, not including bonuses?” Jiang Yilin said jokingly. “If it were me just out of school, I’d take any crumbs they offered.”

她跟另一名学生向祖在北京海淀的一家餐馆见了面。向祖是一名工程学博士生，在一家美国汽车和一家能源公司担任兼职顾问。虽然刚毕业不久，但说话的语气成熟而坚定。餐馆就在向祖公司附近，人来人往，向祖大声批评自己的老板“很邪恶”，因为他在发展中国家生产对环境有害的产品，加剧了全球社会的不平等。
She met another student, Xiang Zu, at a restaurant in Haidian, Beijing. Xiang Zu is a Ph.D. student in engineering and works as a part-time consultant for an American automotive company and an energy company. Although he had just graduated, his tone of voice was mature and resolute. The restaurant was near Xiang Zu’s company, bustling with people. Xiang Zu loudly criticized his boss, calling him “evil,” because he produced environmentally harmful products in developing countries, exacerbating global social inequality.

他不喜欢公司的产品，干脆买了一辆竞争对手品牌的车，每天开到公司上班。向祖跟公司高层反映了情况。他觉得自己可以比老板做得更好，计划着创办自己的企业，打垮公司，占据国际市场。
He didn’t like the company’s products, so he bought a car from a competitor’s brand and drove to work at the company every day. Xiang Zu reported the situation to the company’s higher-ups. He felt he could do better than his boss and planned to start his own business, crush the company, and dominate the international market.

和文章开头那位“把老师挂黑板上”的学生一样，向祖也习惯了公开质疑权威，“把上级挂黑板上”。在这些学生身上，明显还留着过去校园精英教育留下的影子。
Like the student in the beginning of the article who “hung his teacher on the blackboard,” Xiang Zu was also accustomed to publicly questioning authority, “hung his superiors on the blackboard.” These students clearly still bore the shadows of past elite education in schools.

以前那个会靠在姜以琳身上聊梦想的女孩特蕾西，后来成为香港一家知名投资银行的交易员。姜以琳在北京中心一个繁华的商业区，见到了回大陆度假的她。特蕾西戴着一副墨镜，穿着从国外淘来的名牌包包和鞋子，两个人闲逛时，特蕾西走进了一家茶叶店，准备给她的上司们挑礼物。就像在中学时，给她的老师们送礼一样。
The girl Tracy, who used to lean on Jiang Yilin to talk about dreams, later became a trader at a renowned investment bank in Hong Kong. Jiang Yilin met her back in mainland China for vacation in a bustling commercial district in the center of Beijing. Tracy wore sunglasses and brand-name bags and shoes she had picked up from abroad. While strolling, Tracy entered a tea shop, planning to pick out gifts for her superiors, just like she used to do for her teachers in middle school.

她告诉姜以琳：“我的上司们都很喜欢我。他们为什么不喜欢我呢？我这么好的员工！”几年前，她也曾用一模一样的话描述她和老师们的关系，“老师都喜欢我。有什么理由不喜欢我呢？我这么好的学生。”
She told Jiang Yilin, “My superiors all like me. Why wouldn’t they like me? I’m such a good employee!” A few years ago, she had also described her relationship with her teachers in exactly the same way, “The teachers all like me. What reason would they have not to like me? I’m such a good student.”

在那所位于北京西郊的中学，每周都有一两次“校长时间”，校长会邀请那些对学校有意见的学生聊天，听取他们的建议。小到厕所的卫生、学校的学习氛围，大到校庆能不能邀请马戏团，租个过山车设备进校，这样的要求，校长几乎都会采纳。得到权威人士的认可，让有权势的大人满足自己的需求，这是精英教育中的一环。
At the high school located in the western suburbs of Beijing, there were one or two “Principal’s Time” sessions each week, where the principal would invite students who had opinions about the school to chat and listen to their suggestions. From small matters like the cleanliness of the restrooms and the learning atmosphere of the school to big ones like whether to invite a circus for the school celebration or bring in a roller coaster equipment for the school, the principal would almost always accommodate such requests. Getting recognition from an authority figure and having powerful adults meet their needs is part of elite education.

在这种环境下，学生们天然有着更强的自信和权利意识。比如，享受老师随叫随到的服务。特蕾西高三那年，想申请约翰·霍普金斯大学，需要递交文书材料。在申请截止的几个小时前，特蕾西突然感到焦虑，临时决定再改一版申请书。晚上十点多，她给即将准备上床睡觉的辅导员打了一通电话，让他帮忙在一个小时内，再做一轮修改。要知道，那是辅导员最忙的申请季。很多普通学生想跟辅导员见面咨询，都要提前几周预约。
In this environment, students naturally have stronger confidence and a sense of entitlement. For example, enjoying the teachers’ availability on demand. During her senior year, Tracy wanted to apply to Johns Hopkins University and needed to submit application materials. A few hours before the application deadline, Tracy suddenly felt anxious and decided to revise her application one more time. At 10:30 PM, she called her counselor, who was about to go to bed, asking him to make another round of revisions within an hour. It was the busiest application season for the counselor. Many ordinary students had to schedule appointments weeks in advance just to meet with the counselor.

在这群处于金字塔顶端的孩子来说，世界就是一个任我调动、任我驰骋的后花园。在一次采访中，姜以琳提到精英学生的“我值得”的信念感：“他们相信，我就值得被这么好地对待，我就值得拿到这么多的资源。”
For these children at the top of the pyramid, the world is like a garden at their disposal, free to roam and explore. In an interview, Jiang Yilin mentioned the “I deserve” belief of elite students: “They believe that they deserve to be treated so well and that they deserve so many resources.”

Tony毕业后，在纽约一家金融公司工作。生日时，他在皇后区的大楼楼顶办了一场派对。有二十几个朋友、同事来为他庆生。有一个朋友是当天下午才从波士顿坐火车赶来的，第二天清早，就要匆匆回去公司开会。而他的同事们，前一天刚刚结束了两周的工作集训，每个人都很疲惫。但他从没想到过会有人拒绝他的邀请。
After graduation, Tony worked at a financial company in New York. On his birthday, he threw a party on the rooftop of a skyscraper in Queens. About twenty of his friends and colleagues came to celebrate with him. One friend had taken a train from Boston that afternoon just to make it for the party, and the next morning, he had to rush back to his company for a meeting. Meanwhile, his colleagues had just finished a two-week work boot camp the day before and were all exhausted. But he never imagined that someone would refuse his invitation.

如果单看就业，在姜以琳调查的28个学生中，只有一位貌似偏离了主流的精英道路。毕业于剑桥大学的诗盈，从事公益事业工作。她的收入，远远低于在金融行业工作同学。
If you look at employment alone, among the 28 students surveyed by Jiang Yilin, only one seemed to deviate from the mainstream elite path. Shi Ying, a graduate of Cambridge University, works in public welfare. Her income is far lower than that of her classmates who work in the financial industry.

姜以琳很快纠正了这种看法。诗盈结了婚，在地位体系坐标上，不单要考虑她个人，还要纳入她的家庭。诗盈的丈夫是耶鲁大学的研究生，不久前成立了一家公司。如果未来企业发展足够壮大，公益事业可以是精英式的形象公关。
Jiang Yilin quickly corrected this perception. Shi Ying is married, and when considering her position in the social hierarchy, her family must also be taken into account. Shi Ying’s husband is a graduate student at Yale University and recently founded a company. If the business grows sufficiently in the future, public welfare work could serve as an elite-style public relations image.

姜以琳的调研在2019年结项。如今已经过去四年，当初那些会挽着她的手在学校里散步，叫她“姐姐”的孩子们，已经变成了快30岁的世界精英。姜以琳明显感受到，校园生活，是她和这些学生们生活轨迹的一个短暂交点。如果现在再让她去融入这群人的生活，会变得非常困难。
Jiang Yilin’s research project was completed in 2019. Now, four years have passed since then. The children who used to walk hand in hand with her on campus and call her “older sister” have now become nearly 30-year-old global elites. Jiang Yilin clearly feels that campus life was just a brief intersection point in the life trajectories of her and these students. If she were to try to integrate into their lives now, it would become very difficult.

有一个孩子在聚餐时，提到过自己在芝加哥找到一份很好的工作。光是公司的名字，姜以琳听了六遍，都没弄懂。最后她回到家，找到访谈录音，根据读音在网上找，最后让受访者拼出整个公司名称才查到。
A child mentioned during a gathering that he had found a great job in Chicago. Just the name of the company, Jiang Yilin couldn’t understand after hearing it six times. Finally, she went home, found the interview recording, searched online based on the pronunciation, and only found the full company name after asking the interviewee to spell it out.

“我是学二代，他们可能是商二代，”姜以琳说：“他们的很多东西我都不懂，我们对彼此现在生活的理解太过于缺乏。”
“I’m second-generation, they might be business second-generation,” Jiang Yilin said, “There are many things I don’t understand about them, and we lack too much understanding of each other’s current lives.”

姜以琳和这群学生之间的关系，似乎也是某种社会层次隔膜的佐证。两条相交线朝不同的轨道疾驰而去，这些孩子，正在奔向她难以想象的未来。
The relationship between Jiang Yilin and this group of students also seems to be evidence of a social class gap. Two intersecting lines rushing off in different tracks, these children are heading towards a future that she can hardly imagine.

• END -

*文章原载于真实故事计划，关注我们，这里将持续推出好看有深度的优质长文。
*Originally published on the Real Story Project. Follow us for more high-quality, in-depth long articles to be released here.

沈幼楚h h h h h h 梨花飘落在你窗前～[流泪] 2周前·四川 73
Shen Youchu h h h h h h Pear blossoms fall before your window～[tear] 2 weeks ago·Sichuan 73

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开14条回复 遇寺即寻头像 遇寺即寻 没错，在今年我看了一本书，叫做精英的傲慢，深刻探讨了精英阶层的优绩主义，因为优绩很完美的掩盖了富人阶级生而就得到的优势，当他们把自己得到的一切权利和地位都认作是自己努力和天赋的结果，自然戴上了傲慢 2周前·贵州 1747
Expand 14 replies Encountering a temple, seeking the avatar Encountering a temple Yes, this year I read a book called “The Elites’傲慢,” which deeply explores the meritocracy of the elite class. Because meritocracy perfectly masks the advantages that the wealthy class is born with. When they regard all the rights and status they have obtained as the result of their own effort and talent, they naturally wear arrogance 2 weeks ago·Guizhou 1747

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开7条回复 一一头像 一一 写得很好，不过还不够，曾经我以为这些名校精英是我永远也赶不上的，即使我们都在同一所大学，但他们对大学的理解、人生的规划、从小素质教育的熏陶，跟我这种在小城市只有读书选项，傻傻以为到了大学就可以随便玩的人太不一样。我想这种积淀和意识的差距是弥补不了的，何况他们也如此聪明。但事实证明，这些优秀很多时候也是幌子。这些名校学生因为家庭、教育的积淀才能进入普通孩子进入的同一所大学，意味着如果你是和他们在一个学校、一个圈层的普通人、那么可能你的个人纯实力是超过他们的。现在我比当时我以为不可超过的这些孩子去了更好的研究生院校、去了更厉害的公司、挣了更多的钱，虽然也偶有一两个精英教育下的天才走的比我远很多，但也有普通家庭出来的天才走的比他们更远。人生很长，足够均值回归，不要因为这些看上去晃眼的起跑线差距而妄自菲薄。总有厉害的人白手起家，为什么不可能是我们呢？ 2周前·美国 7316
Expand 7 replies - Avatar - Wrote very well, but not enough. Once I thought these elite from top universities were beyond my reach forever. Even though we were in the same university, their understanding of the university, life planning, and the nurturing from quality education since childhood were too different from me, who only had the option to study in a small city and foolishly thought I could play freely once I entered university. I think this accumulation and gap in awareness are irreparable, let alone that they are so smart. But 事实证明, these excellences are often just illusions. These top university students can enter the same university as ordinary children only because of their family background and educational accumulation. It means that if you are an ordinary person in the same school and circle as them, your personal pure strength may be better than theirs. Now I have gone to better graduate schools and more powerful companies, earned more money than the children I once thought I could never surpass. Although a few geniuses nurtured by elite education have gone much further than me, there are also geniuses from ordinary families who have gone further than them. Life is long enough for mean reversion. Don’t be humble just because of the dazzling starting line gap. There are always talented people who started from scratch. Why can’t it be us? 2 weeks ago · USA 7316

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开141条回复 玛卡巴卡头像 玛卡巴卡 “特权从来不以特权本来的面目出现” 2周前·广东 1.2万
Expand 141 replies - Makabaka Avatar Makabaka “Privilege never appears in its true form” 2 weeks ago · Guangdong 12,000

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开47条回复 次芊头像 次芊 人生很长，足够均值回归！ 2周前·湖北 63
Expand 47 replies Qianzi avatar Qianzi Life is long enough for mean reversion! 2 weeks ago·Hubei 63

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开6条回复 用户已注销头像 用户已注销 苦命辅导员 大半夜起来改推荐信 不过还好我在民办遇不到这么积极的学生嘿嘿嘿[色] 2小时前·重庆 1
Expand 6 replies User has logged out avatar User has logged out Suffering Advisor Got up in the middle of the night to revise recommendation letters But 幸运 ly I don’t encounter such active students in private schools haha[smiley] 2 hours ago·Chongqing 1

分享 回复 死水头像 死水 资源怪以为自己老有操作了[憨笑] 2周前·江苏 215
Share Reply Dead Water avatar Dead Water Resource monsters think they have a lot of operations[laugh] 2 weeks ago·Jiangsu 215

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开9条回复 无所不能刘管家 🫧头像 无所不能刘管家 🫧 十一学校直接秒了[钱] 1周前·北京 5
Expand 9 replies 无所不能 Liu 管家 🫧 avatar 无所不能 Liu 管家 🫧 Directly beat [Money] 1 week ago · Beijing 5

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开9条回复 发财汉堡公主珠💍头像 发财汉堡公主珠💍 想到了《人生七年》，有的孩子从出生开始就是“领先”的，不只是物质条件，更多是耳濡目染影响的看世界的角度，做人做事，如果普通家庭的人想要达到，天时地利人和，缺一不可，进入社会也会碰更多的壁，世界是不公平的，唯一公平的就是每个人都将死亡 2周前·河北 474
Expand 9 replies Get Rich Burger Princess Pearl 💍 avatar Get Rich Burger Princess Pearl 💍 Thought of “Seven Up,” some children are “ahead” from birth, not just material conditions, but more the perspective of the world influenced by osmosis, how to be a person and do things. If people from ordinary families want to achieve this, heaven, earth, and human are all necessary, missing any one is not enough. Entering society will also encounter more obstacles. The world is unfair, the only fairness is that everyone will die 2 weeks ago · Hebei 474

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开5条回复 小卡拉米的拍照日记头像 小卡拉米的拍照日记 不知道为什么，突然想起来昨天看到的一个视频，说是宇航员们在宇宙中看地球时会流泪，国界线什么的都是不存在的，人类之类的战争，荣华富贵等等毫无意义。 1周前·陕西 57
Expand 5 replies Xiaokarami’s Photography Diary Avatar Xiaokarami’s Photography Diary Suddenly, I remembered a video I saw yesterday, saying that astronauts cry when they look at Earth from space, where there are no national borders, and wars like humans, wealth and status are all meaningless. 1 week ago · Shaanxi 57

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开2条回复 无辰头像 无辰 这个评论区比我之前看到过的评论区好多了。没有尖锐和极端的声音。[流泪][流泪][流泪] 10小时前·江西 6
Expand 2 replies Wuchen Avatar Wuchen This comment section is much better than the ones I’ve seen before. There are no sharp or extreme voices. [Crying][Crying][Crying] 10 hours ago · Jiangxi 6

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开1条回复 LESS IS MORE头像 LESS IS MORE ……可是他们到了那个位置根本不会满足，因为总有更厉害的维度，都是相对而言罢了，如果他们深陷优绩主义，慕强无限，那有什么可羡慕的，令人发指的是，他们可能更容易找到自己擅长并且钟爱一生的事情，这个点才应该是，对于每天接受同质化教育的普通人而言，最深刻的不公 2周前·吉林 270
Expand 1 reply LESS IS MORE avatar LESS IS MORE … but they will never be satisfied when they reach that position because there are always more powerful dimensions. It’s all relative. If they are deeply entangled in performanceism and endlessly admire the strong, what is there to envy? What’s appalling is that they might more easily find something they are good at and love for a lifetime. That should be the deepest injustice for ordinary people who receive homogenized education every day. 2 weeks ago · Jilin 270

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开13条回复 captain头像 captain 中国这片土地不相信阶层，大家都平等，王侯将相宁有种乎是骨子里的玩意 2周前·北京 136
Expand 13 replies captain avatar captain This land does not believe in social classes. Everyone is equal. “Kings and nobles are not born of a certain kind” is something rooted deep within. 2 weeks ago · Beijing 136

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开19条回复 潜流头像 潜流 这些也只是富裕的中产或市民罢了[暗中观察]真特权群体几乎不会被多数人注意到 2周前·北京 426
Expand 19 replies 潜流 avatar 潜流 These are just the rich middle class or citizens [暗中观察] The real privileged group is rarely noticed by most people 2 weeks ago·Beijing 426

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开7条回复 Johnn头像 Johnn 隐形的翅膀 2周前·山东 299
Expand 7 replies Johnn avatar Johnn Invisible Wings 2 weeks ago·Shandong 299

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开5条回复 鉴字头像 鉴字 建议那些高三毕业生，初入大学的学生，一定要看一下郑雅君的《金榜题名之后》 1周前·江苏 5
Expand 5 replies User Avatar Jianzi Jianzi Suggest those senior high school graduates, freshmen entering university, must take a look at Zheng Yajun’s “After Passing the Golden List” 1 week ago · Jiangsu 5

分享 回复 咕噜咕嘟头像 咕噜咕嘟 很难想象在抖音刷到了这么高质量的文章，我已经很久没有看过这样的文章了，久远到好像从来没有见过[流泪][流泪]读本科五年我以为已经丧失了阅读长文字的能力，很高兴我能有耐心看完[流泪][流泪] 2周前·广东 386
Share Reply User Avatar Gulugudu Gulugudu It’s hard to imagine stumbling upon such a high-quality article on Douyin, I haven’t read an article like this in a long time, long ago to the point where it feels like I’ve never seen one before [crying][crying] I thought I had lost the ability to read long texts after five years of undergraduate studies, I’m very happy that I had the patience to finish it [crying][crying] 2 weeks ago · Guangdong 386

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开7条回复 seek头像 seek 精英最可怕的是他们意识不到自己的成功不完全因为自己的努力，而是有家庭的托举，这会让他们难以理解阶层的差距 2周前·江苏 4961
Expand 7 replies seek avatar seek The most terrifying thing about elites is that they are unaware that their success is not entirely due to their own efforts, but also due to the support of their families. This makes it difficult for them to understand the gap between social classes 2 weeks ago · Jiangsu 4961

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开21条回复 知心神偷头像 知心神偷 42岁中年 当年初中和高中时期爸妈给我描绘的是考上大学包分配的美好愿景，考上大学就可以玩[柴犬]结果还挺好的，上了所工科211 然后玩了半年陪同学去隔壁综合985的英语角..当时他就想拉我做个伴不孤独,然后我聊到这个985度一个大三小姐姐她已经在准备gre了…回校后我就收拾收拾没再玩了，她为我打开了另一扇窗..然后06年我也想申请英国学校雅思也拿了6.5average 但是一年的学费真的太贵了，父母给了我这笔钱 但是这笔钱够我在省会买一套房了..我于是拿着这笔父母给的钱买了套房[呆无辜]然后凭着良好的外语和专业技能去了一家外企工作。它是我人生里的第二套房..第一套房是我高一我妈为我买的未来婚房，之后15年前拿着它们抵押贷款了另外几套房，于21年全部抛售了。现在的我工作只为混个社保到年龄退休了.业余找了母语老师学法语和德语做个polyglot是中年愿望.[愉快]虽然留学曾经是我心底里最深的愿望，但是互联网技术发展,有德语和法语母语的老师分别教我语言也算曲线实现了[柴犬] 2周前·中国台湾 165
Expand 21 replies Heartfelt Thief avatar Heartfelt Thief 42-year-old middle-aged When I was in junior and senior high school, my parents painted a beautiful vision for me: if I got into university, I would be guaranteed a job. If I got into university, I could play with [Shiba Inu]. It turned out to be quite good. I went to a 211 engineering university and then played for half a year, accompanying classmates to the English corner of a neighboring comprehensive 985. At that time, he wanted to pull me in as a partner so I wouldn’t be lonely, and then I mentioned that a third-year girl at this 985 was already preparing for the GRE… After returning to school, I packed up and didn’t play anymore. She opened another window for me… Then in 2006, I also wanted to apply to UK schools and got an average of 6.5 in IELTS. But the tuition for one year was really too expensive. My parents gave me this money, but this money was enough for me to buy a house in the provincial capital… So I used this money given by my parents to buy a house [innocent]. Then, with my good foreign language skills and professional skills, I went to work for a foreign company. It was the second house in my life… My first house was the future wedding house my mother bought for me in my senior year of high school. Later, 15 years ago, I used them as collateral to take out loans for several more houses, and I sold them all in 2021. Now, I only work to mix a social security to retire at the age of retirement. In my spare time, I found a native teacher to learn French and German and become a polyglot, which is my midlife wish. [Happy] Although studying abroad was once the deepest wish in my heart, but with the development of internet technology, having native-speaking teachers teach me languages in German and French can also be considered a curvy realization [Shiba Inu] 2 weeks ago · Taiwan, China 165

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开5条回复 青萝团子头像 青萝团子 “ 在这群处于金字塔顶端的孩子来说，世界就是一个任我调动、任我驰骋的后花园。在一次采访中，姜以琳提到精英学生的“我值得”的信念感：“他们相信，我就值得被这么好地对待，我就值得拿到这么多的资源。” @112799 1周前·甘肃 16
Expand 5 replies Qingluo Tuanzi avatar Qingluo Tuanzi “For these children at the top of the pyramid, the world is a backyard that I can manipulate and roam at will. In an interview, Jiang Yilin mentioned the ‘I deserve’ belief of elite students: ‘They believe that I deserve to be treated so well, and I deserve so many resources.’ @112799 1 week ago·Gansu 16

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开3条回复 VV头像 VV 像意林会收录的文章 1周前·四川 5
Expand 3 replies VV avatar VV Articles that might be included in Lin Yi 1 week ago·Sichuan 5

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开2条回复 东方晶晶头像 东方晶晶 学生时代我看这篇文章会觉得很自卑，现在三十多岁再看这类文章会觉得和我有啥关系[呲牙]，这个世界上除了家人朋友有多少值得care 的东西，比较是大可不必，这世界足够大，容得下每一个努力的人 2周前·湖南 1720
Unfold 2 replies Eastern Jingjing avatar Eastern Jingjing In my student days, I would feel very inferior reading this kind of article. Now, in my thirties, reading it again, I wonder what it has to do with me [grinning]. How many things in this world are worth caring about besides family and friends? It’s really unnecessary to compare. This world is big enough to accommodate every hardworking person 2 weeks ago · Hunan 1720

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开21条回复 🧋小兔头像 🧋小兔 作者姜以琳也是富二代了，谁能自费做7年的跟踪研究，各个国家飞[灵机一动] 1周前·江苏 6
Unfold 21 replies 🧋Little Rabbit avatar 🧋Little Rabbit The author Jiang Yilin is also from a wealthy family. Who can afford to conduct a 7-year tracking study at their own expense, flying to different countries [lightbulb moment] 1 week ago · Jiangsu 6

分享 回复 看到我叫我去学数学头像 看到我叫我去学数学 人是社会关系的集合 [杀马特]人家努力了几辈子了没有同一性 要和自己比较 2周前·江西 33
Share Reply See Me Called Me to Study Math avatar See Me Called Me to Study Math People are collections of social relationships [grunge] They’ve worked hard for several generations without a sense of identity. It’s better to compare with oneself 2 weeks ago · Jiangxi 33

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开2条回复 小晴天☀️头像 小晴天☀️ 真的应该推荐给所有高中初中的孩子们 2周前·河南 24
Expand 2 replies Xiao Qingning☀️ avatar Xiao Qingning☀️ It really should be recommended to all high school and junior high school students 2 weeks ago·Henan 24

分享 回复 彭于晏（河南分晏）头像 彭于晏（河南分晏） 知道而改变不了 更会让人绝望 大部分学生只会抱怨父母 抱怨家庭的 年纪决定了认知注定不会像现在的你我一样高一点 反而会困住自己 2周前·河南 238
Share Reply Peng Yuanyan (Henan Branch Yan) avatar Peng Yuanyan (Henan Branch Yan) Knowing and being unable to change it will make people more desperate Most students only complain about their parents and their families Age determines cognition and it’s bound to be no higher than you and I now Instead it will trap themselves 2 weeks ago·Henan 238

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开15条回复 用户3158528214206头像 用户3158528214206 这些公主们可别被凤凰男骗哦 2周前·江西 1
Unfold 15 replies User 3158528214206 avatar User 3158528214206 These princesses better not be fooled by phoenix men 2 weeks ago·Jiangxi 1

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开17条回复 zzzz头像 zzzz 除去父辈在资源上的托举，这种自尊自信，批判精神，包括面对问题解决问题的品质，也是托举中重要的一环 2周前·河北 3134
Unfold 17 replies zzzz avatar zzzz Apart from the support in resources from the parents, this sense of self-confidence, critical spirit, and the quality of facing and solving problems are also important aspects of the support 2 weeks ago·Hebei 3134

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开19条回复 THREE头像 THREE 奥赛训练营，加60分，是打几个骚扰电话知道的？哈哈哈 2周前·上海 12
Unfold 19 replies THREE avatar THREE Osmanthus Training Camp, plus 60 points, how did you know by making a few nuisance calls? Hahaha 2 weeks ago · Shanghai 12

分享 回复 苦旅头像 苦旅 OPENAI的研发成员，翁家翌，清华贵系出身，他就是降分录取的，在抖音有采访你可以搜 2周前·江苏 28
Share Reply bitter journey avatar bitter journey OPENAI’s R&D member, Weng Jiayi, from Tsinghua’s prestigious system, he was admitted with reduced scores, you can search for interviews on Douyin 2 weeks ago · Jiangsu 28

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开4条回复 爱喝柠檬茶头像 爱喝柠檬茶 @Birdy～* 真羡慕他们有打破一切的权威与有人托底的底气 2周前·湖北 27
Unfold 4 replies love drinking lemon tea avatar love drinking lemon tea @Birdy～* really envy them for having the authority to break everything and the confidence to be backed 2 weeks ago · Hubei 27

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开2条回复 偏偏坠我心河头像 偏偏坠我心河 优绩主义满足了精英阶层的傲慢 1周前·山西 5
Expand 2 replies 偏偏坠我心河 avatar 偏偏坠我心河 The meritocracy satisfies the arrogance of the elite class 1 week ago · Shanxi 5

分享 回复 天为谁春头像 天为谁春 非常有感触，第一次看与这个文章类似的内容是《金榜题名：大学生出路分化之谜》，文章和书本中描述了非一代大学生，甚至可以说是中产或者更高层次家庭，他们在竞争中所得到的助力远大于第一代大学生。面对升学规划，第一代大学生面对的未来世界更像是黑箱，一份没有地图的迷宫。 2周前·广东 370
Share Reply 天为谁春 avatar 天为谁春 Very touching, the first time I saw content similar to this article was “Golden 榜题名: The Mystery of University Student Stratification,” where the article and book described that non-first-generation university students, even those from middle-class or higher-level families, received far greater support in competition than first-generation university students. Facing academic planning, the future world of first-generation university students is more like a black box, a maze without a map. 2 weeks ago · Guangdong 370

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开5条回复 依然繁华头像 依然繁华 “资本主义教育的本质就是阶级再生产。”详情可以看1975年人民日报
Expand 5 replies Still prosperous avatar Still prosperous “The essence of capitalist education is the reproduction of class.” Details can be seen in the People’s Daily of 1975

1周前·广西 9
1 week ago · Guangxi 9

分享 回复 小白牙牙头像 小白牙牙 老师的已经是普通人眼里的天之骄子，年轻有 为，可是她的终点甚至够不上那些28个孩子的起点…而我这个小虾米，只能通过互联网窥探到他们世界的一缕光 18小时前·云南 5
Share Reply Xiaobaiyayaya avatar Xiaobaiyayaya The teacher has already become the pride of the ordinary people, young and talented, but her destination is even lower than the starting point of those 28 children… And me, this little shrimp, can only glimpse a little light of their world through the internet 18 hours ago · Yunnan 5

分享 回复 10:23头像 10:23 普通家庭 从小接触的教育就是 不能当面驳斥老师[捂脸] 2周前·湖北 25
Share Reply 10:23 avatar 10:23 Ordinary family The education they received since childhood is that you cannot directly contradict the teacher [smiley face] 2 weeks ago · Hubei 25

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开5条回复 爷青回௸头像 爷青回௸ Claire的母亲是一个有博士学位的医生，管理着一个助理团队。陈医生形容自己是个局外人，“什么也没为她做”，“一切都是她自己做的”。 聊到一半，陈医生接到了女儿带来的电话，Claire按照学校的要求，需要制作一个大海报。陈医生安排给自己的博士生，几个人很快一起印出来一个人形大小的海报。但事后姜以琳再次问起，没人记得，也没人觉得这算什么值得说的事。 2周前·北京 8
Expand 5 replies Grandpa’s reaction Avatar Grandpa’s reaction Claire’s mother is a doctor with a PhD, managing an assistant team. Dr. Chen describes herself as an outsider, “I didn’t do anything for her,” “It’s all her own doing.” Halfway through the conversation, Dr. Chen receives a call from her daughter, Claire, who needs to make a large poster according to the school’s requirements. Dr. Chen arranges for her PhD students to quickly print out a human-sized poster together. But after Jiang Yilin asks again later, no one remembers, and no one thinks it’s something worth mentioning. 2 weeks ago·Beijing 8

分享 回复 glance头像 glance 这有啥好揭秘的，还不如讲点普通人怎么爬起来 2周前·四川 2
Share Reply glance Avatar glance What’s there to reveal, it’s better to talk about how ordinary people get back up 2 weeks ago·Sichuan 2

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开1条回复 Марина头像 Марина 其实我真正体会到普通家庭的孩子和有钱家庭孩子的差别是在我大学。他们可以毫不客气的认为导员老师就是服务于学生的，因为他们知道就算导员不给他们入党三好的名额他们也有更多更好的渠道获得这些东西。可是普通家庭的孩子，譬如我，我不得不为导员做很多工作才能换取名额，因为我只有这个机会。但是今年我突然想开了，我觉得没什么东西值得我向另一个人卑躬屈膝委曲求全，我逐渐有了主体意识。感恩大学教育。 2周前·河北 428
Expand 1 reply Marina avatar Marina Actually, I truly experienced the difference between children from ordinary families and those from wealthy families during my university years. They can consider the academic advisor as serving the students without any hesitation, because they know that even if the advisor doesn’t give them spots for the “Three Good Qualities” membership, they have many other better ways to obtain these things. But children from ordinary families, like me, had to do a lot of work for the advisor just to exchange for these spots, because I only had this opportunity. However, this year, I suddenly had an epiphany. I realized that nothing was worth me bowing down to another person or compromising my principles. I gradually developed a sense of self-awareness. Grateful for university education. 2 weeks ago, Hebei 428

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开7条回复 雪松与玫瑰头像 雪松与玫瑰 这位母亲甚至不需要额外付出什么，不需要自己动手，就可以马上得到成果。这里真的看得人好窒息
Expand 7 replies Cypress and Rose avatar Cypress and Rose This mother doesn’t even need to make any extra effort or do it herself, yet she can immediately get the results. It’s really suffocating to see this.

6天前·湖南 113
6 days ago · Hunan 113

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开4条回复 小河向西流头像 小河向西流 之前看过一篇文章，讲得是为什么最后刘邦能够打败项羽，其中一条就是刘邦是从平民阶级一路向上爬的，所以他清楚各个阶级各个层次的人的内心想法是怎样的，所有他能够安抚好每个人得到所有人的支持，而项羽不一样他是项燕的后人贵族出生，所以一出生他就是以贵族的视角来看待这个世界但这也注定了他视野的局限，他很难去理解和共情底层人民的想法。举两个例子项羽在兵败后没有选择渡江而是自刎，因为从小以来的贵族教育不支持他放下个人的尊严灰头土脸的回到故土而刘邦却能在彭城之战3万对五十六万大败后卷土重来，在父亲将要被煮之时说“吾与霸王俱北面事怀王，结为兄弟，吾翁即汝翁，如汝烹汝翁，幸分我一杯羹！”叫别人分他尝尝，这是项羽所做不到。底层阶级也有专属于底层阶级的优势，有一句话我很认同“人才的产生具有不可复制性。” 2天前·福建 47
Expand 4 replies Xiao River Westflows avatar Xiao River Westflows Previously, I read an article about why Liu Bang was able to defeat Xiang Yu in the end. One reason mentioned was that Liu Bang came from a commoner background and worked his way up, so he understood the inner thoughts of people from all classes and levels. As a result, he was able to appease everyone and gain their support. Xiang Yu, however, was born into nobility as the descendant of Xiang Yan. From birth, he viewed the world from a noble perspective, but this also limited his vision. He found it difficult to understand and empathize with the thoughts of the common people. Let me give two examples. After his defeat, Xiang Yu chose to commit suicide rather than cross the river. This was because his noble upbringing did not allow him to lower his dignity and return to his homeland in disgrace. In contrast, Liu Bang, after suffering a major defeat in the battle of Pengcheng with only 30,000 troops against 560,000, managed to rally his forces and make a comeback. When his father was about to be cooked, he said, “I served the King of Huaiyang alongside the 霸王 and made a brotherhood with him. My father is your father. If you cook my father, please share a little of the soup with me!” This was something Xiang Yu could never do. The lower class also has its own unique advantages. There is a saying I strongly agree with: “The emergence of talent is irreplaceable.” 2 days ago · Fujian 47

分享 回复 LS头像 LS 时代变了，但又好像没变 2周前·山东 35
Share Reply LS avatar LS The times have changed, but they seem to have not changed 2 weeks ago · Shandong 35

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开2条回复 77.头像 77. 家庭带给不仅仅是资源上的托举，更是“我值得”这种与生俱来信念感，这是普通家庭永远比不上的。 1周前·湖北 130
Expand 2 replies 77. Avatar 77. Family brings not only material support but also an inherent sense of worthiness, which is something ordinary families can never match. 1 week ago · Hubei 130

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开7条回复 Cheesxy头像 Cheesxy 时常看看评论区的一些同志们 明明没赚到过这个钱 也没接触过这个阶级的人 却有自己的独特见解 这或许就是人类多元性的表现 许多事情根本不是通过思考就能弥补的 但是这份思考的勇气推动着人类前进 做到自己想要的就行了 不是所有人都希望变成有钱人的 只是他们目前看不到有钱的弊端罢了 2周前·英国 187
Expand 7 replies Cheesxy Avatar Cheesxy Often look at some of the comrades in the comments. Those who have never earned this kind of money or been exposed to this class yet have their own unique insights. This may be the manifestation of human diversity. Many things cannot be compensated for simply through thinking, but this courage to think drives humanity forward. Just do what you want to. Not everyone wants to become rich. They just don’t see the downsides of being wealthy yet. 2 weeks ago · UK 187

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开7条回复 Mikaaa咪咔耶头像 Mikaaa咪咔耶 我害怕看到这种文章，bgm 让我产生了近乎窒息的 紧张感，想哭、无措、心慌，对于少年来说，最恐怖的事情就是意识到自己是一个普通人，待在一个永远无法逃出去的牢笼里。 2周前·海南 14
Expand 7 replies Mikaaa’s avatar Mikaaa I’m afraid to see such articles, the background music made me feel almost suffocatingly tense, want to cry, helpless, heart palpitations. For a teenager, the most terrifying thing is realizing that they are an ordinary person, trapped in a cage from which they can never escape. 2 weeks ago · Hainan 14

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开1条回复 Sh1ngjA头像 Sh1ngjA 精英教育的成功在于，如果给你财富，地位，荣誉以至于到达那一阶层，你是否会让自己的孩子选择精英教育。实际上，你所有的对于这种差距的感叹和疑问，如果不把这个问题好好想清楚，那么你单纯就是自己没过上精英式教育的生活，以至于生活在这种无意间的对比中，你给自己过的相对不好找了个借口。这是我指出的问题所在，那么你接下来要问我，问题好指出来，怎么才能意识到呢？我的答案是，精英教育的本质是节省时间成本。精英教育的父母拿着的就是人生错题本，哪怕不是他们自己的，他们也可以通过各种途径，让孩子知道什么才是对于这个阶层正确的，从而减少试错的时间成本，相反，这些孩子通过精英教育的代价是，他们不得不展现各方面乃至全方面的优秀，孩子的人生似乎是被推着走的小车，所谓的更广阔的选择空间，只不过是家庭拿着错题本帮你排除掉错误选项后的珍馐。在这个意识形态和认知状态下，所以我认为精英教育是半成功半失败的。孩子们他们去到其他没有这个家庭条件的孩子去不到的地方，然后创造出自己的价值。这种价值无疑技能给社会再来价值，也能给他自己的家庭这个阶层带来更好的价值。失败在于，错题本是有滞后性的，过去的时间经验并不能指出所有错题。 1周前·北京 4
Expand 1 reply Sh1ngjA’s avatar Sh1ngjA The success of elite education lies in whether, if you are given wealth, status, and honor to reach that level, you would choose elite education for your own children. In reality, all your lamentations and questions about this gap, if you don’t think this issue through clearly, then you are simply someone who hasn’t experienced elite education, and thus you find an excuse for your relatively less favorable life in this unintentional comparison. This is the problem I point out. So, you will ask me next, the problem is well pointed out, how can one realize it? My answer is that the essence of elite education is saving time costs. The parents of elite education hold life’s answer key, even if it’s not their own, they can use various means to let their children know what is correct for this class, thereby reducing the time cost of trial and error. Conversely, the price these children pay for elite education is that they have to demonstrate excellence in all aspects, if not all aspects. Their lives seem like small cars being pushed forward, and the so-called broader choice space is merely a delicacy after the family has used the answer key to eliminate the wrong options for you. In this ideological and cognitive state, I believe elite education is half successful and half failed. The children go to places that children without this family background cannot reach, and then create their own value. This value undoubtedly brings value to society and also brings better value to their own family’s class. The failure lies in the lagging nature of the answer key; past experiences cannot point out all the mistakes. 1 week ago · Beijing 4

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开1条回复 wifier头像 wifier 我来自一个毫无托举的江西小县城家庭，兢兢业业的卷中考、高考、保研、转码、大厂实习。甚至也在有意识的去学习理财，学习主动表达，锻炼社交，扩展视野，把自己打扮的漂漂亮亮。转头看看已经胜过99%的初高中同学。却发现现在周围的大部分朋友同事都比我幸福、松弛、自洽，也比我擅长社交、沟通、表达。天下英雄如过江之鲫，我的小聪明在985比垃圾桶还多的上海不值一提。[流泪] 1周前·上海 57
Expand 1 reply wifier avatar wifier I come from a small, unsupported family in Jiangxi. I’ve been working hard for the junior high school exam, the high school exam, postgraduate recommendation, code-switching, and internships at big companies. I’ve even consciously been learning about financial management, active expression, social skills, broadening my horizons, and making myself look good. But when I look around, I’ve surpassed 99% of my middle and high school classmates. Yet I realize that most of my current friends and colleagues are happier, more relaxed, and more self-actualized than I am. They are also better at socializing, communicating, and expressing themselves. The world is full of heroes, and my little intelligence is insignificant in Shanghai, a city with more 985 universities than trash cans. [Crying] 1 week ago · Shanghai 57

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开5条回复 玩具车头像 玩具车 这一看就是十一 2周前·四川 11
Expand 5 replies toy car avatar toy car This must be the National Day holiday 2 weeks ago · Sichuan 11

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开6条回复 破产后靠倒卖老公白袜东山再起头像 破产后靠倒卖老公白袜东山再起 @答案说明所有 @iamran @三百五（见过三百五版 精英的傲慢 2周前·湖南 2
Expand 6 replies 破产後靠倒卖老公白襪東山再起頭像 破產後靠倒賣老公白襪東山再起 @答案說明所有 @iamran @三百五（見過三百五版 精英的傲慢 2 週前·湖南 2

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开2条回复 SElian头像 SElian 这文章怎么感觉有股子脱离实际的鸡汤味呢 2周前·湖南 72
Expand 2 replies SElian 头像 SElian This article feels like it has a taste of unrealistic motivational 鸡汤 2 週前·湖南 72

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开25条回复 深藏 𝙗𝙡𝙪𝙚.头像 深藏 𝙗𝙡𝙪𝙚. 这种采访毫无实际意义，真正的阶层你接触不到或者你察觉不了[泪奔]，而且当订了标签就等于被上了一套游戏规则…至于谁赢了你觉得这个是谁说了算[黑脸] 15小时前·广西 0
Expand 25 replies Hide 𝙗𝙭𝙖𝙧𝙚. avatar Hide 𝙗𝙭𝙖𝙧𝙚. This interview has no practical significance, you can’t access or notice the real class [crying], and once you’re labeled, you’re subjected to a set of game rules… As for who wins, do you think it’s who decides [angry face] 15 hours ago · Guangxi 0

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开2条回复 小刘不听🌷～头像 小刘不听🌷～ 但一个人最珍贵的东西阶层给不了：对知识的热情和渴望，他们带有这种心态的人，学习对他们来说是快乐，不是代表自己比别人厉害，是单纯的喜欢，
Expand 2 replies Xiao Liu doesn’t listen🌷～ avatar Xiao Liu doesn’t listen🌷～ But the most precious thing a person has, class can’t give: passion and desire for knowledge. People with this mindset find learning joyful, not to represent being better than others, but simply because they like it.

题主说的确实很现实，但我们不要因此而自卑或者失去信心，我们可以因为知道这些去看透他们的底层逻辑，这也是一种知识，就像他们也要了解我们的生活一样，大家都是需要学习的，
What the user said is indeed very realistic, but we should not feel inferior or lose confidence because of it. We can gain insight into their underlying logic by knowing these things, and this is also a form of knowledge. Just as they need to understand our lives, everyone has something to learn.

而且真正有对知识的热爱的人，会思考阶层对我们来说真的重要吗，我想要的到底是什么？而不是盲目的在阶层的困顿下，蒙蔽了双眼…… 2周前·黑龙江 131
Moreover, those who truly love knowledge will think about whether the social class really matters to us, and what we truly want? Instead of being blindly trapped in the struggles of social class, blinding our eyes… 2 weeks ago, Heilongjiang, 131

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开8条回复 微小景头像 微小景 本质就是家里托底培养出来的精英，你说个人魅力，能力有多大？，其实就是底层孩子单拎出来比智商都不会差太多，差的是家人托举，集中精力去使劲给托上去。 2周前·山东 17
Expand 8 replies Microjing avatar Microjing In essence, they are elites raised and nurtured by their families. You say personal charm, how big is their ability? In reality, if you take a child from the bottom layer alone, their IQ wouldn’t be that much worse. The difference lies in the support from their families, focusing all their efforts to lift them up. 2 weeks ago, Shandong, 17

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开5条回复 一切都变好！头像 一切都变好！ 寒门难出贵子，要不要去了解一下什么是寒门，什么时候草莽流寇 2周前·浙江 1
Expand 5 replies Everything will be better! Avatar Everything will be better! It’s hard for the poor to produce outstanding individuals, want to learn what the poor are, when the grassland bandits 2 weeks ago · Zhejiang 1

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开1条回复 沈君辞头像 沈君辞 看了这篇文章，我觉得最重要的还是心气自信和自尊。教育的培养所花费的金钱，对于普通人来说确实很难磨平差距，但互联网的快速发展，已经让我们有了更多可能的去获取这些资源，凭借我们大部分人的努力，也可以缩小这个差距，接下来，对于这冗长的一生，最重要的就是心气与坚定了。而我现在的痛苦，也正是源于我心气与自尊的不足，不能相信自己，不愿行动。 1周前·广西 48
Expand 1 reply Shen Junci Avatar Shen Junci After reading this article, I think the most important thing is still ambition, self-confidence and self-respect. The money spent on education is indeed very difficult for ordinary people to bridge the gap, but with the rapid development of the Internet, we have more possibilities to obtain these resources. With the effort of most of us, we can also narrow this gap. Next, for this long life, the most important thing is ambition and determination. And my current pain also comes from my lack of ambition and self-respect, I can’t believe in myself, I don’t want to take action. 1 week ago · Guangxi 48

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开2条回复 @头像 @ 这篇文章，放在各个国家，或者历朝历代都适用啊，这不就是阶层问题吗？普通人不要焦虑，没有开挂的人生，就慢慢一步一步往上走，自己什么水平就和什么水平的人比较，这些人要和特朗普的公子比较也是差着段位的，他们毕竟是少数，我们要做的就是做好自己的每一步 1周前·山东 9
Expand 2 replies @Avatar @ This article, placed in various countries, or through different dynasties, would still be applicable, right? This isn’t just about class issues? Ordinary people shouldn’t be anxious; without a game-changing advantage in life, just gradually climb up step by step. Compare yourself with people of your own level, and these people are also far behind when compared to Donald Trump’s son. They are after all the minority. What we need to do is to do our best in every step. 1 week ago · Shandong 9

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开1条回复 啾啾头像 啾啾 想学社会学，可惜对于我家来说，读文科绝对没那么容易找工作，稍有不慎就会失败。所以读了不擅长的理工科，电气工程，想去考电网。上了两年才知道学校教的是弱电，自己要考电网需要自学更多知识，在我报考的时候，没有任何人可以给我指导，我爸总是有些自责又有些高兴，自责自己没能给我更好的前程，高兴我是个争气的孩子，是我家唯一一个考得上大学的，只有我总觉得无力，失眠，越发觉得自己孑然一身…… 2周前·福建 30
Expand 1 reply Chirp Avatar Chirp I want to study sociology, but for my family, studying liberal arts is absolutely not easy to find a job. A slight mistake could lead to failure. So I ended up studying a major I’m not good at, Electrical Engineering, and want to take the power grid exam. After two years, I realized the school taught me weak electricity, and I need to self-study more knowledge to take the power grid exam. When I applied, no one could guide me. My dad was always somewhat guilty and somewhat happy. Guilty that he couldn’t give me a better future, happy that I’m a diligent child, and the only one in my family who could get into university. Only I always felt powerless, insomnia, and increasingly felt like I was all alone… 2 weeks ago · Fujian 30

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开2条回复 来日方长头像 来日方长 六朝何事？ 2周前·河南 10
Expand 2 replies Long-term Future Avatar Long-term Future What happened in the Six Dynasties? 2 weeks ago·Henan 10

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开1条回复 洋弋头像 洋弋
Expand 1 reply 洋弋 Avatar 洋弋

2周前·河南 1
2 weeks ago · Henan 1

分享 回复 De剑安头像 De剑安 [思考]好像都是文科金融，没几个愿意吭哧吭哧干纯理工的[思考] 2周前·湖北 11
Share Reply Dejian avatar Dejian [thinking] It seems like most are in liberal arts and finance, not many willing to work hard on pure STEM [thinking] 2 weeks ago · Hubei 11

分享 回复 幻存消.头像 幻存消. 文科是用来镀金的 商科金融啥的上限可比工科高多了 但是你家里算上资产总共没2k个学金融也没啥用[捂脸] 2周前·北京 29
Share Reply Huancun Xiao avatar Huancun Xiao. Liberal arts are just for gold plating. The ceiling for business, finance, etc. is much higher than for engineering. But if your family’s total assets aren’t over 2k, studying finance isn’t that useful [facepalm] 2 weeks ago · Beijing 29

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开8条回复 雅思满分头像 雅思满分 [蜜蜂狗]其实我觉得倒是不如自己高兴的度过一生[蜜蜂狗] 如果你很幸福那么钱自然会够用[蜜蜂狗] 那些人也不过是过了自己高兴的一生 但是人和人之间的快乐不是金钱可以抵价的[蜜蜂狗] 与其说那些人资源真好 不如跟自己说我在迷茫中自己走到现在我也很好[蜜蜂狗] 2周前·北京 174
Expand 8 replies IELTS full-mark avatar IELTS full-mark [Bee Dog] I actually think it’s better to live happily on your own [Bee Dog] If you are very happy, then money will naturally be enough [Bee Dog] Those people are just living out their own happy lives But the happiness between people cannot be measured in money [Bee Dog] Instead of saying those people have such good resources, it’s better to tell yourself that I am also doing well despite my confusion [Bee Dog] 2 weeks ago · Beijing 174

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开6条回复 下班高手头像 下班高手 西方的天才学生更是出自于精英家庭，中国的寒门贵子算是很多了 2周前·四川 42
Expand 6 replies Off-duty Expert avatar Off-duty Expert Western geniuses are even from elite families, and Chinese underdogs are quite rare 2 weeks ago · Sichuan 42

分享 回复 重名太多头像 重名太多 现在越来越少了，普通人拥有的教育资源不能和他们比。人家拥有顶级教育资源，普通家庭除非孩子天赋异禀不然真的很难和他们竞争。像庞众望真的是凤毛麟角。 2周前·陕西 95
Share Reply Too many identical names avatar Too many identical names There are fewer and fewer of them now. The educational resources available to ordinary people cannot compare to theirs. They have access to top-tier educational resources, and ordinary families, unless their children are exceptionally talented, really can’t compete with them. Like Pang Zhongwang, he is truly a rare gem. 2 weeks ago · Shaanxi 95

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开10条回复 魔力头像 魔力 翻译一下:混到高中毕业，捐个国外名牌大学，玩到毕业回来，父母利用自己的能力给孩子找个饭碗[看][看][看] 2周前·山东 22
Expand 10 replies Magic Avatar Magic Translation: Got through high school, donated to a famous university abroad, played until graduation, and used their own abilities to find a job for their child [Look][Look][Look] 2 weeks ago · Shandong 22

分享 回复 扶老👵🏻闯红灯头像 扶老👵🏻闯红灯 你没仔细看吧 2周前·陕西 75
Share Reply Elderly Crossing Red Light Avatar Elderly Crossing Red Light Didn’t you look closely? 2 weeks ago · Shaanxi 75

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开49条回复 于适的老婆巴太的媳妇邓放的家属姬发的妻头像 于适的老婆巴太的媳妇邓放的家属姬发的妻 被培养出的精英，他们的抗风险能力是家庭赋予的，靠自己的精英，他们的抗风险能力是自身一路锻炼出来的 2周前·安徽 191
Expanded 49 replies About the wife of Yu Shi, the wife of Ba Tai, the wife of Deng Fang, the wife of Ji Fa, the headshots of the family members of the wife of Deng Fang, the wife of Ji Fa, the elite they were nurtured into, their risk resistance ability is given by the family, relying on their own elite, their risk resistance ability is honed through their own journey. 2 weeks ago · Anhui 191

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开5条回复 RealxAIRbus头像 RealxAIRbus 教育不存在绝对的公平，我们的发展是不平衡的，优质资源的聚集，和学生背景的层次，自然会促使学校有不同的目标，以文中的形式教育学生，或者像网络媒体中抨击的“山河四省”学校那样，暴力机械的朝着一个夸张的目标前进。没有阴谋论那样刻意的分割出这两种差异，一切都是资源的自然流向和认知层次将人群的划分逐渐自然的形成的。只要有人类社会文明的产生和发展就会导致这个结果。我guo太大了，是一个复杂立体且有魅力的果+，我们朝着最初的理想和信念前进的路途，要靠一代又一代人的坚持努力才能实现，加油各位[抱抱你] 2周前·北京 39
Expanded 5 replies RealxAIRbus avatar RealxAIRbus Education does not have absolute fairness, our development is uneven, the gathering of high-quality resources, and the background of students, will naturally lead to different goals for schools, educating students in the form mentioned in the article, or like the “Four Provinces of Mountains and Rivers” schools criticized in online media, moving violently and mechanically towards an exaggerated goal. There is no conspiracy theory of deliberately dividing these two differences, everything is the natural flow of resources and the gradual natural formation of the division of people by cognitive levels. As long as there is the production and development of human society and civilization, this result will occur. Our country is too big, a complex, three-dimensional, and charming fruit+, the path towards our original ideals and beliefs must rely on the persistent efforts of generations to realize, keep going everyone [hugs you] 2 weeks ago · Beijing 39

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开2条回复 昭武余一人头像 昭武余一人 “特权从来不以特权本来的面目出现，精英的培育方式，让这些孩子相信，自己是靠着勤奋和天赋赢得了一切。并且让未来产生的阶层分化，看上去那么地自然、合理。” 这正是capitalism的运行逻辑。 1周前·四川 16
Expand 2 replies Zhaowu Yu one person avatar Zhaowu Yu “Privilege never appears in its true form; the way elites are nurtured makes these children believe that they have won everything through hard work and talent. And it makes the future class division look so natural and reasonable.” This is exactly the operating logic of capitalism. 1 week ago · Sichuan 16

分享 回复 C33头像 C33 记得有段时间闹过类似对“清北”精英式教育的批判，大意是说作为国内顶级学府的清北，这几十年实为国外输送了源源不断的“人才”资源，无论是财力还是能力，佼佼者众多，学成归国投入建设的寥寥无几，都是一帮精致的利己主义者，认为世界就是围着他/她们转，不懂感恩，没有家国大义精神。 不想去讨论对错，这篇文章确实也对应上了。如果作为其中一员，也不确定自己是否能做得更好。 唯愿“已识乾坤大，犹怜草木青”。 2周前·广东 7
Share Reply C33 avatar C33 There was a time when criticism similar to this about the “Tsinghua and Peking University” elite education was raised. The 大意 was that as top domestic universities, Tsinghua and Peking University have been supplying a steady stream of “talent” resources to foreign countries in the past few decades. Whether in terms of financial resources or ability, the number of outstanding individuals is numerous, but very few return to contribute to the country. They are all refined egoists, believing the world revolves around them, lacking gratitude, and no sense of national spirit. I don’t want to discuss right or wrong, but this article does correspond to it. If I were one of them, I’m not sure if I could have done better. Only wish for “Having recognized the vastness of the universe, still cherishing the green of grass and trees.” 2 weeks ago · Guangdong 7

分享 回复 KK头像 KK [发呆]智商都那么高？能上清北的智商都不低 1天前·山西 0
Share Reply KK avatar KK [zoning out] Are IQs that high? The IQs of those who get into Tsinghua and Peking University are not low 1 day ago · Shanxi 0

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开3条回复 贴贴虎皮钛空空头像 贴贴虎皮钛空空 说的好棒[赞][赞]，或许不看数值的顶点，看我们自己数值的绝对值，更能激励振奋人心[贴贴]。如果精英的顶点是100分，而我们步履不停的只达到90分或者刚60分及格，不要气馁怀疑。他们的起点已经是30分，甚至更多，而我们的起点是0甚至是负值，那么这样的长度跨越，是我们一直努力只能靠着一条路摸出来的，就像是我们对创一代和富二代的赞扬评价，词语使用语境都不一样。命运是虚伪的，现实是要充满力量与希望的，我们都要有勇气、有心气去拿到那个你想要的。 2周前·河北 56
Unfold 3 replies Sticky Tiger Skin Titanium Empty Avatar Sticky Tiger Skin Titanium Empty Said it was great [Like][Like], perhaps not looking at the peak of numbers, but looking at the absolute value of our own numbers, can better motivate and inspire people [Sticky]. If the peak of the elite is 100 points, and we, who never stop, only reach 90 points or just 60 points to pass, don’t be discouraged or doubt. Their starting point is already 30 points, or even more, while ours is 0 or even negative. Then such a length of 跨越, is the only way we can 摸出来 through constant effort, just like our praise and evaluation of the first generation and the second generation of rich, the context of word usage is different. Fate is deceptive, reality must be full of strength and hope, we must all have the courage and ambition to get what you want. 2 weeks ago · Hebei 56

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开1条回复 MICKY头像 MICKY 其实不同时代都有看不到的机遇，而这种机遇不是伸手便可以拿到的，绝对需要努力，也就是说必须要汗水和灵感，灵感我自己解释为长远的目光和开放的思维。上个世纪的人，一部分认为只要有个稳定的工作以及收入就可以了，但还有部分人靠知识或者先决的商业头脑去拼去闯，才有了今天的光鲜亮丽。现代很多人觉得自己不会成功是因为没有吃到时代红利或自己的父辈没有提供优渥环境以及条件，但真正的机遇，属于现代的机遇，是从你开始朝一个方向努力开始，我的理念就是“做了再说”，而不是在这条路上左顾右盼、怨天尤人。 2周前·四川 24
Expand 1 reply MICKY’s avatar MICKY In fact, every era has unseen opportunities, and these opportunities are not within reach just by reaching out; they absolutely require effort, meaning sweat and inspiration. I myself explain inspiration as long-term vision and open-mindedness. In the last century, some people thought that just having a stable job and income was enough, but others relied on knowledge or pre-existing business acumen to fight and strive, which led to today’s brilliance. Many people today feel they won’t succeed because they haven’t benefited from the era’s dividends or their parents haven’t provided a prosperous environment and conditions, but the true opportunities belong to the modern era, starting from the moment you begin to strive in a certain direction. My philosophy is “do and see,” rather than looking left and right, complaining about the heavens and the earth on this path. 2 weeks ago · Sichuan 24

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开1条回复 南飞雁头像 南飞雁 高中同班一个同学北京的，我的成绩一直比他好，后来听说他考上了人大，我只上了个普通211。2003年左右我家一年收入五六千，只是他家一个月开销[捂脸] 2周前·广东 9
Unfold 1 reply Nanfeiyan avatar Nanfeiyan A classmate from high school in Beijing, my grades were always better than his. Later, I heard he got into Renmin University, while I only attended an ordinary 211 university. Around 2003, my family’s annual income was around 5,000 to 6,000 yuan, but his family’s monthly expenses were [embarrassed] 2 weeks ago · Guangdong 9

分享 回复 杳杳头像 杳杳 @🌴 @少春秋 @芷若春和 @看得见太阳吗 “得到权威人士的认可，让有权势的大人满足自己的需求，这是精英教育中的一环。”天啊 2周前·安徽 5
Share Reply Yooyo avatar Yooyo @🌴 @Shao Chunqiu @Zhi Ruochun He @Can See the Sun? “Getting recognized by authoritative figures to satisfy the needs of powerful adults is part of elite education.” Oh my god 2 weeks ago · Anhui 5

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开2条回复 ☣晓☣头像 ☣晓☣ 真正的英雄主义是看清生活的真相后仍积极乐观地面对生活 1周前·贵州 4
Unfold 2 replies ☣Xiao☣ avatar ☣Xiao☣ The true heroism is to face life with optimism after seeing the truth of life 1 week ago · Guizhou 4

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开3条回复 无聊头像 无聊 想起甄嬛传里面“玲珑见惯了世态炎凉，习惯了人心轻贱，不怕心寒。世上贵人之多，难免将我更轻贱些，玲珑只能自强” 2周前·湖北 154
Expand 3 replies Boring Avatar Boring Remembering the line from “Empresses in the Palace”: “Lingering has seen the ups and downs of the world, accustomed to people’s disdain, and is not afraid of heartache. There are many nobles in the world, it’s inevitable that they will look down on me more. Lingering can only rely on herself” 2 weeks ago, Hubei 154

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开3条回复 晏黥头像 晏黥 觉得很痛苦……没有家庭托举自己也不争气，脑子笨的很，读了个二本师范也不知道自己以后能做什么
Expand 3 replies Yan Ceng Avatar Yan Ceng Feels very painful… No family support, nor do I have the drive, very stupid, studied at a second-tier normal university and still don’t know what I can do in the future

2周前·山东 42
2 weeks ago·Shandong 42

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开4条回复 tihiro头像 tihiro 有试错空间的家庭会养出愿意主动尝试的小孩，而人生的成功最主要的就是不怕输。因为怕输的人，没有赢得资格 2周前·日本 9
Expand 4 replies tihiro avatar tihiro Families with room for trial and error tend to raise children who are willing to take the initiative to try, and the main thing about success in life is not being afraid of losing. Because those who are afraid of losing don’t have the qualification to win 2 weeks ago·Japan 9

分享 回复 何乐不为头像 何乐不为 没事 不生以后他们也会滑落阶层的 2周前·甘肃 10
Share Reply Helebuwo avatar Helebuwo Nothing happens They will also fall down the social ladder 2 weeks ago·Gansu 10

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开3条回复 wslz头像 wslz 我一直有个问题想看看大家对此的看法，一个边缘农村出生的孩子，灰蒙蒙的童年，却在长大的时候家庭因为某些原因实现了阶级跨域，而这时这个人的未来是会怎么样的呢，他的思想会有怎么样的变化 2周前·贵州 4
Expand 3 replies wslz avatar wslz I’ve always had a question and wanted to see everyone’s opinion on it. A child born in the 边缘 rural areas, with a greyish childhood, had their family achieve class mobility due to certain reasons when they grew up. So, what would this person’s future be like? How would their thoughts change? 2 weeks ago · Guizhou 4

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开1条回复 老公出匦玩小叁叫我在门口给私生喂乃头像 老公出匦玩小叁叫我在门口给私生喂乃 像是专业知识的差距和一些认知上面的差距是很多普通孩子所无法比拟的 举一个非常简单的例子 一个优秀的普通孩子，从汽车专业毕业之后可以对着上百万的豪车夸夸其谈 但是坐在里面的一个同龄人只需单纯的问他一句你坐过吗？ 那么这个普通孩子的一切都将是过眼云烟 了解和拥有完全是两回事情 普通人所无法感受到的认知差距在那一刻就已经体现出来了 你无法用着一些书面的理论知识与他叫板 因为在你翻开这本书之前，他已经了解的差不多了
Expand 1 reply 老公出匦玩小叁叫我在门口给私生喂乃 avatar 老公出匦玩小叁叫我在门口给私生喂乃 Like the gap in professional knowledge and some cognitive differences that many ordinary children cannot compare. Take a very simple example. An excellent ordinary child, after graduating from a car major, can talk eloquently about millions of high-end luxury cars. But a peer sitting inside just needs to ask them simply, “Have you ever sat in one?” Then everything of the ordinary child will be like a fleeting cloud. Understanding and possessing are two different things. The cognitive gap that ordinary people cannot feel has already been reflected at that moment. You can’t challenge them with some written theoretical knowledge because before you open this book, they already know it almost well

1周前·云南 3
1 week ago · Yunnan 3

分享 回复 AAA7⃣喜批发（见过麦8赫版）头像 AAA7⃣喜批发（见过麦8赫版） 我原来也觉得我走的每一步全靠我自己努力，我爸妈也总跟我说他们提供不了什么助力，我上大学才意识到，从小学开始，每一步他们都给我提供了能接触到的最好的教育资源，可以说我能考一个还可以的大学，他们有90％的功劳，没有家庭的托举，一个普通学生能考到92的概率太低了，遑论出国深造，就从我大学能接触到的同学里，工农出身的比例太低了，同学家里不是大城市的中产，就是地方的头部家庭，教育资源的不平等始终是一个巨大的问题（提一句，十年前、15年左右，可以说是教育资源不平等达到了一个峰值） 1周前·江西 11
Share Reply AAA7⃣ Wholesale (seen the M8 He version) avatar AAA7⃣ Wholesale (seen the M8 He version) I used to think that every step I took relied entirely on my own effort, and my parents always told me they couldn’t provide much support. It wasn’t until I went to university that I realized, starting from primary school, every step they had given me the best educational resources they could access. I could say that I was able to get into a decent university, and they deserve 90% of the credit. Without the support of the family, the probability of an ordinary student getting a 92 score is too low, let alone studying abroad. Even from the classmates I met in university, the proportion of those from working-class backgrounds was too low. My classmates came from either middle-class families in big cities or top local families. Educational resource inequality has always been a huge problem (to mention, about ten years ago, around 2015, educational resource inequality reached a peak). 1 week ago · Jiangxi 11

分享 回复 叶愿随风头像 叶愿随风 写得挺好，但是感觉素材有点老，时效性欠缺，以及忽视了全球经济遇冷下这些阶层家长的反应。全篇读下来颇有预设结论裁剪素材的嫌疑，每个人物都一样，看不到每个例子里人性的那一面，像偶像剧，不去实地访谈也能写出来，作为和他们天天一起学习采访的人，本能很轻松写出亲临者才能感受到的东西 2周前·北京 40
Share Reply Ye Yuansong avatar Ye Yuansong It’s well-written, but it feels a bit outdated, lacking timeliness, and ignores the reactions of these parents from different social classes in the face of the global economic downturn. Reading the whole piece, there’s a suspicion of preconceived conclusions cutting the material, with each character being the same, unable to see the human side in each example. It’s like an idol drama; you don’t even need to conduct on-site interviews to write it. As someone who studies and interviews with them every day, it’s instinctively easy to write about the things that only an eyewitness can feel. 2 weeks ago · Beijing 40

分享 回复 啷个哩个啷头像 啷个哩个啷 是啊 普通家庭的孩子,一步路走错就很容易一蹶不振；而富裕的家庭,走错路,只需要再来一次就可以了。 普通家庭的试错成本太大太大了。 1周前·河南 5
Share Reply Lang Ge Li Ge Lang avatar Lang Ge Li Ge Yeah, children from ordinary families, if they make a wrong step, it’s very easy for them to fall into a crisis; while wealthy families, if they make a wrong step, they just need to try again. The cost of trial and error for ordinary families is too high, too high. 1 week ago · Henan 5

分享 回复 肥肥五花肉头像 肥肥五花肉 无论人生上了哪一层台阶 ，阶下有人在仰望你，阶上亦有人在俯视你，你抬头自卑，低头自傲，唯有平视，才能看到真实的自已 2周前·江西 8
Share Reply Fat Pork Belly Avatar Fat Pork Belly No matter which step of life you reach, there are people looking up at you below the stairs, and there are also people looking down at you above the stairs. You feel inferior when you look up and arrogant when you look down. Only by looking straight can you see the real yourself 2 weeks ago · Jiangxi 8

分享 回复 冰红茶棒冰头像 冰红茶棒冰 精英的傲慢会给他们带来短视，向来如此 2周前·湖南 3
Share Reply Iced Tea Bar Iced Tea Bar The arrogance of the elite will bring them short-sightedness, as it has always been 2 weeks ago · Hunan 3

分享 回复 有意思的人生头像 有意思的人生 这一切是以中国稳定的政治环境为基础的，所以阶层可以延续 2周前·河北 4
Share Reply Interesting Life Avatar Interesting Life All this is based on China’s stable political environment, so the hierarchy can be maintained 2 weeks ago · Hebei 4

分享 回复 重生之我是AI大王头像 重生之我是AI大王 加油，一直走下去普通人都有机会 2周前·江苏 31
Share Reply Rebirth I Am AI King Avatar Rebirth I Am AI King Keep going, keep moving forward. Ordinary people also have opportunities 2 weeks ago · Jiangsu 31

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开3条回复 木子（Dickseek）头像 木子（Dickseek） 这也就是为什么马克思主义有一句，为了人自由全面的发。我看到有些人说不要怪罪背景，足够的努力与能力可以追平差距什么的。但只要阶级存在，就永远会有那少数拥有特权存在，这是必然的。但不是说你应该摆烂，而是我们的努力就是为了量变大到质变。我也不是在说废话，而是明确区分我们的目的和立场。 2周前·广西 20
Expand 3 replies Muzi (Dickseek) avatar Muzi (Dickseek) This is also why Marxism has a saying, “for the free and comprehensive development of people.” I see some people say not to blame the background, that enough effort and ability can bridge the gap. But as long as class exists, there will always be that minority who possess privileges, and that is inevitable. But it doesn’t mean you should give up; rather, our efforts are to grow to the point of transformation. I’m not just talking nonsense; I’m clearly distinguishing our goals and stance. 2 weeks ago · Guangxi 20

分享 回复 Qian头像 Qian 这也谈不上什么特权嘛，文中的人依旧在上升机制中，甚至还有高考不行才去选择走另外的路的人。只是家中的资源让他们走得更容易更远，这是理所当然的，但真正的特权可不管这些。 4天前·贵州 1
Share Reply Qian avatar Qian This isn’t really about privilege either. The people in the article are still in the upward mobility system, and some even choose alternative paths because they didn’t perform well in the college entrance exams. It’s just that family resources make it easier and farther for them to go, which is only natural. But true privilege doesn’t care about any of that. 4 days ago · Guizhou 1

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开1条回复 冬日浪漫头像 冬日浪漫 [哭哭][哭哭][哭哭]
Unfold 1 reply Winter romantic avatar Winter romantic [cry][cry][cry]

2周前·广东 3
2 weeks ago · Guangdong 3

分享 回复 𝘾𝙄𝙀𝙇头像 𝘾𝙄𝙀𝙇 精英教育出精英～ 可这世界，精英只是世家的职业经理人～是提供专业服务的阶层～ 而世家，是不拿世俗标准去衡量自我价值的～[尴尬流汗] 1周前·广东 3
Share Reply 𝘾𝙄𝙀𝙇 avatar 𝘾𝙄𝙀𝙇 Elite education produces elites~ But in this world, elites are just professional managers of aristocratic families~ They are the class that provides professional services~ And the aristocratic families, do not measure their self-worth by worldly standards~[embarrassed sweating] 1 week ago · Guangdong 3

分享 回复 野原琳.头像 野原琳. 文案每次都重，太像AI啦[九转大肠] 2周前·陕西 6
Share Reply 野原琳. avatar 野原琳. The copy is always too heavy, too much like AI [nine turns of pork] 2 weeks ago · Shaanxi 6

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开2条回复 水煮玉米粒头像 水煮玉米粒 特权从来不以特权本来的面目出现，而在于“他们”所拥有的一开始就排除了别人的游戏选择和难以获取的信息 2周前·湖南 7
Expand 2 replies Corn 粒 avatar Corn 粒 Privilege never appears in its true form, but in the game choices and hard-to-access information that “they” possess from the beginning 2 weeks ago·Hunan 7

分享 回复 阿楸.头像 阿楸. 如果懒得阅读这个文章的，抖音搜索一下“北京高中生采访”，某种程度上你就会对北京为什么高考分数比别的省要求低豁然开朗 1天前·辽宁 1
Share Reply Aqiu. avatar Aqiu. If you’re too lazy to read this article, search for “Beijing high school students interview” on Douyin, to some extent, you will suddenly understand why Beijing’s college entrance exam scores are lower than other provinces 1 day ago·Liaoning 1

分享 回复 水火炼志长头像 水火炼志长 老壶装新酒，没有什么实际意义 18小时前·重庆 0
Share Reply Corn Fire Refining Will avatar Corn Fire Refining Will Old pot with new wine, it means nothing 18 hours ago·Chongqing 0

分享 回复 mynamesAO头像 mynamesAO 真的是这样 精英家庭的教育是潜移默化的 单靠学校的应试教育怎么可能成为人才 我认为精英家庭的隐形教育比硬资源重要的多 孩子的各种力比如说学习力、沟通能力、抗挫力、修养、为人处世的方式都更依赖于家庭。这也是一个人能否走得长远的根本 比表象的暂时的分数成绩更至关重要。 1天前·上海 7
Share Reply mynamesAO avatar mynamesAO It’s really like this. The education of elite families is subtle and gradual. How can one become a talent relying solely on the exam-oriented education provided by schools? I think the invisible education of elite families is much more important than hard resources. A child’s various abilities, such as learning ability, communication skills, resilience, temperament, and ways of dealing with others, depend more on the family. This is also the foundation of whether a person can go far. It is far more crucial than the superficial, temporary scores. 1 day ago · Shanghai 7

分享 回复 eliauk_Nico头像 eliauk_Nico 世界是他们的牡蛎 2周前·意大利 6
Share Reply eliauk_Nico avatar eliauk_Nico The world is their oyster 2 weeks ago · Italy 6

分享 回复 1666头像 1666 说实话，总是天然的认为别人比自己强，真的很奇怪，想克服这种东西的话，我建议可以去学习一下数学，不一定要提升自己的数学能力，你就理解他的公式的推导，理解他数学的这个历史，你从18世纪19世纪一直学到现代，不需要你会用，你只需要了解它的历史就行了，为什么会出现这个东西？这个东西解决了什么问题？把人类能搞懂的都过一遍，最终学到尽头之后，你也会发现人类整体发展的无力感，什么看一遍就记住一本书的天才，精通天文，历史，地理，各种各样的人才，那又如何呢？他对世界的理解也仅限于此了，数学界已经很久没有重大的更新了，物理界也已经很久没有重大的更新了。你已经触碰到了尽头，你解决不了的东西，他们也解决不了。不过这种尝试也有难点，如果你之前学物理学数学，只背公式，不去理解的话，那你再走一遍，这个路是很难的。因为每走一步都是要理解，需要你的学习习惯偏向理解。更何况，科学已经证明了人类输入是有限制的，每秒最多只有10bytes。什么一目十行，大概率是骗人的记忆能力啊，功夫棒啊，你去了解一下记忆大师，你会发现这些都是很有局限性的。只有你了解过了，你就不会有这种神性的崇拜 1周前·广东 5
Share Reply 1666 avatar 1666 Honestly, always naturally assuming others are stronger than oneself is really strange. If you want to overcome this, I suggest you could study mathematics. You don’t necessarily have to improve your mathematical skills. You just need to understand the derivation of its formulas and the history of mathematics. You can learn from the 18th and 19th centuries all the way to the modern era. You don’t need to be able to use it, you just need to understand its history. Why did this thing come about? What problems did it solve? Go through everything humans can understand. Eventually, when you reach the end, you will also find the helplessness of overall human development. What about geniuses who can memorize a book in one glance, proficient in astronomy, history, geography, and all kinds of talents? So what? Their understanding of the world is also limited to this. Mathematics has long been without major updates, and physics has also been without major updates for a long time. You have already reached the end, things you can’t solve, neither can they. However, this attempt also has difficulties. If you previously studied physics and mathematics by just memorizing formulas without understanding, then going through it again is very difficult. Because every step requires understanding, and your learning habits need to lean towards understanding. Moreover, science has proven that human input is limited, with a maximum of 10 bytes per second. What about reading ten lines at a glance? It’s most likely fake memory skills or kung fu sticks. If you look into memory masters, you’ll find that these are all very limited. Only when you understand it, you won’t have this divine worship. 1 week ago · Guangdong 5

分享 回复 述怀头像 述怀 当我意识到寒门出贵子才是真正的天才的时候 1天前·江西 1
Share Reply 述怀 avatar 述怀 When I realized that the poor can produce geniuses is the true genius 1 day ago · Jiangxi 1

分享 回复 大龙女(突泉日日鲜餐饮)头像 大龙女(突泉日日鲜餐饮) 每个人都有自己的人生，不用和别人比，和过去的自己比就好，改变我们能改变的，持续性的学习习惯远远比停在原地自怨自艾更有益，并且不受困于暂时性的失败结果，而是从结果中汲取养分和经验，等待下一个时机来临时顺势而为、 1周前·内蒙古 4
Share Reply Dragon Girl (Tujian Daily Fresh Catering) avatar Dragon Girl (Tujian Daily Fresh Catering) Everyone has their own life, there’s no need to compare with others, just compare with your past self. Change what we can change, and the habit of continuous learning is far more beneficial than staying in place and wallowing in self-pity. Moreover, we should not be trapped by temporary failures but instead draw nourishment and experience from the results, waiting for the right moment to act accordingly. 1 week ago · Inner Mongolia 4

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开1条回复 潘大喵人生日账头像 潘大喵人生日账 我发现有很多被送到国外的富裕家庭的孩子，他们似乎有着很好的资源，在很好的国际学校读书，花钱也是大手大脚，但他们始终融不进顶级的圈层，好像除了有点钱就没有优势了，因为他们骨子里不是贵族，很多东西在弥补但是精神上是跟不上的。这类人反而更容易迷茫，高不成低不就。 2周前·浙江 3
Expand 1 reply Pan Da Miao Life Day Account avatar Pan Da Miao Life Day Account I’ve noticed that many children from wealthy families sent abroad seem to have good resources, attending prestigious international schools and spending money freely, but they can never truly integrate into the top tier. It seems that money is their only advantage, as they are not truly aristocrats at heart. While they may compensate for many things, their spirit cannot keep up. Such people are often more prone to confusion, stuck between high and low. 2 weeks ago · Zhejiang 3

分享 回复 Kuiper头像 Kuiper 菁英比作数字19 普通人是09
Share Reply Kuiper avatar Kuiper Elites are like the number 19, while ordinary people are like 09
山外面还有29、39、……99 19不畏惧29……99的存在 19唯忧心09的虚无 1周前·湖北 2
There are still 29, 39, … 99 outside the mountain 19 is not afraid of the existence of 29 … 99 19 only worries about the void of 09 1 week ago · Hubei 2

分享 回复 别打了我是酱油。头像 别打了我是酱油。 环境霸权 1小时前·湖南 0
Share Reply Stop hitting me I’m the soy sauce. Avatar Stop hitting me I’m the soy sauce. Environmental hegemony 1 hour ago · Hunan 0

分享 回复 FLion🌱头像 FLion🌱 能问ta们[举手]，“现在的生活是你想要的吗？”
Share Reply FLion🌱 Avatar FLion🌱 Can ask them [raising hands], “Is this life what you want?”

“你找到你所热爱的了吗？”[玫瑰] 1天前·江西 0
“Have you found what you love?” [rose] 1 day ago · Jiangxi 0

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开1条回复 西门子小米粥头像 西门子小米粥 其实我之前看到这些会产生怨恨情绪，恨我自己没投个好胎，现在我已经没什么想法了，只求每天淡淡的顺顺的过，毕竟我不是天才，也没有逆天改命，跨越阶层的能力，照顾好自己和家人都力竭了 3天前·江苏 3
Expand 1 reply Siemens Millet Congee Avatar Siemens Millet Congee Actually, I used to feel resentful when I saw these things, resenting myself for not being reborn into a better life. Now I don’t have much of an idea anymore, just hoping to pass each day calmly and smoothly. After all, I’m not a genius, nor do I have the ability to defy fate and cross social classes. Taking care of myself and my family has already exhausted me 3 days ago · Jiangsu 3

分享 回复 梁不凉头像 梁不凉 世界英才这个词，现在就是讽刺 2周前·广西 1
Share Reply Liang Bu Liang Avatar Liang Bu Liang The term “world’s talent” is now just ironic 2 weeks ago · Guangxi 1

分享 回复 孜孜头像 孜孜 看完我发现我妈和这些家长咋如出一辙，我一直觉得就是全靠我自己的天赋和努力，还有好运气。现在想想我妈给我做的各种打算确实功不可没[听歌]从9年级开始关于我教育上的花费开支每年60起步，今年申请大学更是花了150万。我是学钢琴的，师从哪个教授最重要。一开始高中入学我教授不看好我觉得我基础差，不想收我把我推给了其他老师，后面我妈一顿操作我现在早就变成了和他非常亲近且重视的学生了[泪奔] 6天前·美国 9
Share Reply Ziz Avatar Ziz After watching, I realized my mom and these parents are exactly the same. I’ve always thought it was all thanks to my own talent and hard work, plus good luck. Now I think about it, the various plans my mom made for me definitely played a significant role [Listening to music] Starting from 9th grade, the annual expenses on my education were as high as 60,000. This year’s university application cost 1.5 million. I study piano, and the most important thing is which professor I study under. At first, when I entered high school, my professor didn’t think highly of me, feeling I had a weak foundation and didn’t want to take me, pushing me to other teachers. Later, my mom did some maneuvering, and now I’ve become a very close and valued student of his [Crying] 6 days ago · USA 9

分享 回复 芥末酷头像 芥末酷 这篇文章的背景音乐是什么，听着有点头皮发麻的感觉，我想收藏一下常听[送心][送心] 2周前·江西 3
Share Reply Mustard Cool avatar Mustard Cool What is the background music for this article, it feels a bit like a headache when listening, I want to collect it for frequent listening [Send Heart][Send Heart] 2 weeks ago · Jiangxi 3

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开2条回复 l1头像 l1 对阶层复制感兴趣的大家可以去看看布迪厄的著作[戳手手] 2周前·河北 1
Expand 2 replies l1 avatar l1 Everyone interested in the class structure can check out Bourdieu’s works [Point Finger] 2 weeks ago · Hebei 1

分享 回复 锦绣山河头像 锦绣山河 高考的第一条线就是户口，河南户口能和北京上海户口比么？不管是录取分数线还是试卷的难度，河南考生心里没感觉么？大家都是过来人，很多家庭在户口上就先行一步了。 1周前·河北 2
Share Reply Jinxiu Shanhai avatar Jinxiu Shanhai The first line of the college entrance exam is the household registration. Can Henan household registration be compared to Beijing and Shanghai household registration? Whether it’s the admission score line or the difficulty of the exam paper, don’t Henan candidates have a sense of it? Everyone is a fellow traveler, many families take the lead in household registration. 1 week ago · Hebei 2

分享 回复 斗地主低保户头像 斗地主低保户 每个人来到世间就是为了做人，为了体验人，或许这种体验本身就是一项工作，没有人永远一帆风顺，我们要做的，就是坚持下去，快乐的生活下去，因为我们不知道是否还有下辈子，珍惜每分每秒就好 1天前·安徽 3
Share Reply Dou Di Zhen Low-Income Household Avatar Dou Di Zhen Low-Income Household Everyone comes into the world to be human, to experience being human, perhaps this experience itself is a kind of work. No one is always smooth sailing. What we need to do is persist and live happily, because we don’t know if there will be a next life. Cherish every minute and second. 1 day ago · Anhui 3

分享 回复 血压一百八头像 血压一百八 精英家庭的痛苦不是你能理解的，尤其你被家族放弃培养的时候[微笑] 2天前·上海 1
Share Reply Blood Pressure 180 Avatar Blood Pressure 180 The suffering of an elite family is something you can’t understand, especially when you are abandoned by your family for cultivation [smile] 2 days ago · Shanghai 1

分享 回复 用户399532676540头像 用户399532676540 很多家庭不要说托举了，不拖后腿就不错了 2周前·江苏 6
Share Reply User399532676540 Avatar User399532676540 Many families, not to mention supporting, not dragging them down is already good enough 2 weeks ago · Jiangsu 6

分享 回复 用户3424135006375头像 用户3424135006375 养人，很像训狗，条件反射不是一天出来的 2周前·北京 22
Share Reply User3424135006375 Avatar User3424135006375 Raising people is like training dogs; conditioned reflexes don’t develop overnight 2 weeks ago · Beijing 22

分享 回复 会飞的神龙头像 会飞的神龙 真接触到小孩就知道小孩子的智商差距哪有这么大，什么天才，学神，后天教育永远优于先天智力，这些所谓的学神更多是被资源，金钱堆出来，你说外国人羡慕国内孩子成绩好，那也得知道国内这么鸡娃，国外有这么养孩子的？ 1周前·安徽 9
Share Reply Avatar of the Flying Dragon God The Flying Dragon God Truly, once you get close to a child, you’ll know how big the gap in intelligence is, what geniuses, what academic gods, post-natal education always surpasses innate intelligence, these so-called academic gods are more often than not produced by resources and money. You say foreigners envy the good grades of Chinese children, but you should also know if China is so hard on its children, how are children raised abroad? 1 week ago · Anhui 9

分享 回复 用户5376559545833头像 用户5376559545833 那些被命运眷顾的太好的人，也是最不懂得感恩命运的，因为已经觉得这样是理所应当了，其实我们每个人都活在各自的生活轨迹里，所以人一定要多出去走走，多看看世界，感受自然 2周前·河南 11
Share Reply Avatar of User5376559545833 User5376559545833 Those who are too well favored by fate are often the least grateful for it, because they already think it’s only natural. In reality, we all live in our own life trajectories, so one must go out and explore more, see the world, and feel nature 2 weeks ago · Henan 11

分享 回复 Micö头像 Micö 其实不是他们多优秀 多高的智商 而是 出生就写好了终点 3天前·日本 3
Share Reply Avatar of Micö Micö It’s not that they are particularly outstanding or have high intelligence, but rather that their destination is predetermined at birth 3 days ago · Japan 3

分享 回复 𝑆𝑜𝑟𝑒𝑛.Aurora头像 𝑆𝑜𝑟𝑒𝑛.Aurora 基因+资源+环境 1天前·四川 1
Share Reply Avatar of 𝑆𝑜𝑟𝑒𝑛.Aurora 𝑆𝑜𝑟𝑒𝑛.Aurora Genetics + Resources + Environment 1 day ago · Sichuan 1

分享 回复 云生天头像 云生天 人生很长[摊手]就你这样想刘邦还过啥 2周前·北京 2
Share Reply Yun Sheng Tian Avatar Yun Sheng Tian Life is long [hand 摊] If you think like this even Liu Bang has nothing to do 2 weeks ago · Beijing 2

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开2条回复 怎么又不关门头像 怎么又不关门 从另一个角度来说，都是命。没这个福报，命里也没这个钱，你再怎么辛苦再怎么累也赚不到钱的。也不需要羡慕，一般这种有钱人上辈子福报都非常大，这辈子才能拿一个好剧本。而且钱啊物质啊名利这种东西，生不带来死不带去，生前再光鲜亮丽，死了也不过荒冢一堆，这辈子享受了，把福报花光了，下辈子还得回去过普通人的生活 2周前·浙江 4
Expand 2 replies How come it’s not closed again Avatar How come it’s not closed again From another perspective, it’s all fate. Without this blessing, there’s no money in your destiny. No matter how hard you work or how tired you are, you can’t earn money. No need to envy, generally, these rich people have very great blessings in their previous lives, so they can get a good script in this life. Moreover, things like money, material, fame and fortune are not brought into this world and not taken away when you die. Even if you are as glorious and bright as you are in life, when you die, you will only have a pile of tombs. Enjoy this life, spend your blessings, and you will have to go back to a normal life in the next life 2 weeks ago · Zhejiang 4

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开3条回复 阿秋。头像 阿秋。 经历特别重要，如果不考虑平台，一个底层杀上来的精英和家庭托举上来的精英在能力上和思想上会有很大差距，反之在平台上有背景资源的那位是底层上来的那位无法逾越的鸿沟 1周前·广东 1
Expand 3 replies Aqiu. Avatar Aqiu. Experience is particularly important. If the platform is not considered, an elite who rises from the bottom and an elite supported by family will have a significant gap in ability and mindset. Conversely, the one with background resources on the platform is an insurmountable gap for the one who rose from the bottom 1 week ago · Guangdong 1

分享 回复 晦头像 晦 @芦苇 当时我看的一本书，以主人公自己代入的视角并没有剖析得这么清晰，讲的是北京十四中。而后看到的是06年还是08年一个纪录片里那个焦虑的小女孩，最后选择出国留学 2周前·云南 0
Share Reply Hu. Avatar Hu @Reed When I read the book, the perspective of the protagonist’s self-substitution did not analyze it as clearly. It was about Beijing No. 14 Middle School. Later, what I saw was a documentary from 2006 or 2008 about that anxious little girl, who finally chose to study abroad 2 weeks ago · Yunnan 0

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开1条回复 酸辣粉没有粉头像 酸辣粉没有粉 欧阳懿没有被下放之前，总以为自己家族累积的资源都是天上掉下来的，其他人没有学识是自己不努力[摊手] 1周前·广东 2
Expand 1 reply Sour and Spicy Noodles Without Powder. Avatar Sour and Spicy Noodles Without Powder Before 欧阳懿 was sent down, he always thought that the resources accumulated by his family were just falling from the sky. Others lack knowledge because they don’t work hard [hand gesture] 1 week ago · Guangdong 2

分享 回复 Ashhh头像 Ashhh 智力相同主管能动性相同就是谁资源多谁更出色，问题还是在学校的各种自主招生政策有各种操作空间，这才是问题所在，如果真的只是资源的原因其实可以接受。 2周前·上海 4
Share Reply Ashhh avatar Ashhh Intelligence is the same, the initiative is the same, who has more resources is more outstanding, the problem is still the various independent enrollment policies in schools have various operational spaces, this is the problem, if it is really just a resource reason, it can be accepted. 2 weeks ago · Shanghai 4

分享 回复 collaspar头像 collaspar 我的家庭太普通了，以至于我在开头看这篇文章的时候心中的嫉妒一下子就被引出来。读到后面意识到自己没有钱，家里面没有托举是个既定事实，开始麻木了，没办法，我还要生活 1周前·四川 3
Share Reply collaspar avatar collaspar My family is too ordinary, so when I first read this article, the jealousy in my heart was immediately triggered. Reading further, I realized that I don’t have money, and it’s a given fact that my family can’t support me, I started to numb, no choice, I still have to live 1 week ago · Sichuan 3

分享 回复 MI6头像 MI6 自信真是一个严酷的等级，它早就不动声色不漏痕迹的把人划成三六九等。 1周前·山东 6
Share Reply MI6 avatar MI6 Confidence is a harsh level, it has long been silently and imperceptibly dividing people into three six nine levels. 1 week ago · Shandong 6

分享 回复 ayou头像 ayou 好喜欢这个评论区的氛围，没有极端的情绪，都是思考和交流[抱抱你] 19小时前·江苏 3
Share Reply ayou avatar ayou I really like the atmosphere of this comment section, no extreme emotions, just thinking and exchanging [hugs you] 19 hours ago · Jiangsu 3

分享 回复 朝闻道头像 朝闻道 最顶级的老师，最全面的知识，加上大量的经验传授，无限的试错成本，普通人没法玩[抠鼻] 1周前·湖北 19
Share Reply Chao Weng Dao avatar Chao Weng Dao The top-tier teacher, the most comprehensive knowledge, plus a lot of experience sharing, unlimited trial-and-error costs, ordinary people can’t play [nose] 1 week ago · Hubei 19

分享 回复 望山远去山有尽头像 望山远去山有尽 《参差》 1周前·广东 0
Share Reply Wang Shan Far Away The Mountain Has An End Wang Shan Far Away The Mountain Has An End “Chansi” 1 week ago · Guangdong 0

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开1条回复 Florentino头像 Florentino 和郑雅君写的《金榜题名之后》在选题和社科性上有很大相似之处呀 2周前·甘肃 2
Expand 1 reply Florentino avatar Florentino The topic and social science nature of “After Passing The Imperial Exam” written by Florentino and Zheng Yajun have a lot in common 2 weeks ago · Gansu 2

分享 回复 印第安纳的逆水将军头像 印第安纳的逆水将军 想问我有个朋友如果在贵州，家里有点钱可能A7-8不等，自身几乎完全不读书，家里准备送出去。录取结果会好吗？未来就业前景怎么样？[流泪] 1周前·贵州 4
Share Reply Indiana’s Backwater General Avatar Indiana’s Backwater General I wonder if I have a friend if he lives in Guizhou, if his family has some money, maybe A7-8, and he himself almost doesn’t read books at all, and his family is preparing to send him out. Will the admission results be good? What are the future employment prospects? [Crying] 1 week ago · Guizhou 4

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开3条回复 指南羊头像 指南羊 18岁以前，高考仿佛就是屠龙术，苦练这招就能打遍天下。进入大学才发现，只是在用俄罗斯方块的技术去打星际争霸。 6天前·吉林 0
Expand 3 replies Guide Sheep Avatar Guide Sheep Before the age of 18, the college entrance exam was like a dragon-slaying technique. Practicing this skill seemed capable of defeating the world. Upon entering university, I realized that it was just using the technique of Tetris to play StarCraft. 6 days ago · Jilin 0

分享 回复 🌞🌻🌞头像 🌞🌻🌞 读到一半时有一个很明显的情绪察觉，感觉里面的精英阶层面有一种很强烈的阶级滑落的焦虑 2周前·河南 1
Share Reply 🌞🌻🌞 Avatar 🌞🌻🌞 When reading halfway through, there was a very clear emotional realization, feeling that there is a very strong anxiety of class slipping among the elite class 2 weeks ago · Henan 1

分享 回复 e头像 e 精英家庭在费尽心思让孩子意识不到自己的托举，普通家庭在费尽心思让孩子意识到自己的付出 2周前·重庆 12
Share Reply e avatar e Elite families go to great lengths to make their children unaware of their support, while ordinary families go to great lengths to make their children aware of their efforts 2 weeks ago·Chongqing 12

分享 回复 翻開一本記事簿头像 翻開一本記事簿 文化资本 2天前·山东 0
Share Reply Open a notebook avatar Open a notebook Cultural capital 2 days ago·Shandong 0

分享 回复 砸开头像 砸开 全世界都这样，精英家庭有时间有金钱有人脉投入教育，这样的家庭大概率也能培养出精英，投入与产出成正比，相反普通家庭没有资源培养出精英全靠基因突变 1周前·广东 5
Share Reply Knock on head avatar Knock open Everywhere is like this, elite families have time, money, and connections to invest in education, and such families are likely to cultivate elites, input and output are proportional. Conversely, ordinary families lack resources to cultivate elites, relying entirely on genetic mutation 1 week ago·Guangdong 5

分享 回复 识感噹头像 识感噹 在这群处于金字塔顶端的孩子来说，世界就是一个任我调动、任我驰骋的后花园。 1周前·湖北 4
Share Reply Shigen Dang avatar Shigen Dang For these children at the top of the pyramid, the world is a garden at their disposal, free to roam. 1 week ago·Hubei 4

分享 回复 K头像 K 当我初中时突然明白自己辛苦读个大学出来是为了当个普通人 2周前·广西 8
Share Reply K avatar K When I was in junior high, I suddenly realized that all the hard work I put into getting a university degree was just to be an ordinary person 2 weeks ago·Guangxi 8

分享 回复 老奶奶头像 老奶奶 高中的时候，学过均值回归 2周前·贵州 0
Share Reply Old lady avatar Old lady In high school, I learned about mean regression 2 weeks ago·Guizhou 0

分享 回复 红笺小字头像 红笺小字 说实话我小时候觉得老师讲的不对，也直接上台去说，中学时期常年班级第一，小时候没啥爱好就喜欢看书 1周前·河北 1
Share Reply Red paper small characters avatar Red paper small characters To be honest, when I was a child, I thought what the teacher said was wrong, and I even went up on stage to argue. During my middle school years, I was always the top student in class. I didn’t have many hobbies as a child, I just liked reading 1 week ago·Hebei 1

分享 回复 安喔安啦头像 安喔安啦 如果这让你感到焦虑，只说明你被洗脑了，平静的海面培养不出勇敢的水手 2周前·重庆 3
Share Reply Anwo Anla avatar Anwo Anla If this makes you feel anxious, it only means you’ve been brainwashed. A calm sea cannot raise a brave sailor 2 weeks ago·Chongqing 3

分享 回复 🍰头像 🍰 普通人的解法就是把早睡早起、钝一点的少看一些信息，身体养好，健康做到位，找一份糊口工作，平凡普通的过完这一生即可。至于学历、房子、生儿育女等等迷宫不参与就好了，能活一天就赚一天。
Share Reply 🍰Avatar 🍰 The ordinary person’s solution is to go to bed early and wake up early,钝-minded and consume less information, take care of your body, stay healthy, find a job to make a living, and live an ordinary and ordinary life. As for things like education, houses, having children and raising them, etc., just don’t participate in the maze. Earn a day and make a day.

6天前·云南 19
6 days ago · Yunnan 19

分享 回复 亓才孑头像 亓才孑 以前我会觉得这些人是我根本追不上的，后来我才知道，人家只是起点比我高[捂脸] 5天前·广东 2
Share Reply Qicai Mozi Avatar Qicai Mozi Before I used to think these people were fundamentally uncatchable, but later I learned that they just have a higher starting point [facepalm] 5 days ago · Guangdong 2

分享 回复 aphelionrebel头像 aphelionrebel 最直接让我感受到差距的就是，明明对人文社会心理学特别感兴趣，想深入了解学习研究这些问题，却不得不为现实屈服，选择热门更好就业的计算机专业。 1周前·安徽 8
Share Reply Aphelionrebel Avatar Aphelionrebel The most direct way I feel the gap is that, even though they are particularly interested in humanities, social psychology, and want to deeply understand and study these issues, they have to yield to reality and choose a popular and better employment computer major. 1 week ago · Anhui 8

分享 回复 Maura头像 Maura “陈医生安排给自己的博士生……”[酷拽] 6天前·浙江 6
Share Reply Maura avatar Maura “Dr. Chen arranged for his PhD student…” [Cool and aloof] 6 days ago · Zhejiang 6

分享 回复 咀嚼犯贱头像 咀嚼犯贱 @慕清. @且听风铃r @仨瓜俩枣四个梨 财富只会沿着血缘传递 2周前·辽宁 7
Share Reply Chewing Rude avatar Chewing Rude @Mu Qing. @Juetingshengling @Three Melons and Two Dates Wealth will only be passed down through bloodlines 2 weeks ago · Liaoning 7

分享 回复
Share Reply

展开1条回复 今天吃了头像 今天吃了 太假了，这里描述的只是高级打工仔的后代，这些人无论是自己还是父母反而都是最现实的一批人，绝对谈不上所谓的绝对的自信。 1天前·北京 0
Expand 1 reply Today Ate avatar Today Ate Too fake, what is described here is just the descendants of high-level white-collar workers, these people, whether themselves or their parents, are actually the most realistic ones, absolutely not talking about the so-called absolute confidence. 1 day ago · Beijing 0

分享 回复 漪大大大大大头像 漪大大大大大 这个服务器没有删档功能，天赋哥运气哥只是极少数，老玩家靠着前期做任务积累道具材料经验成为大佬，也会带带萌新，仓库材料太多了建个小号用大号养着玩[耶] 1周前·山西 5
Share Reply Wyy’s avatar Wyy This server doesn’t have a delete file function, Tianfu Ge and Luck Ge are just a small number, veteran players rely on accumulating props, materials, and experience from early tasks to become big bosses, and they will also guide new players, too many materials in the warehouse, build a small account and let the big account raise it to play [耶] 1 week ago · Shanxi 5

分享 回复 Yolo头像 Yolo 只要你想写，便能打造出一篇立场与观点全然相悖的深度报道。究其根本，是因为社科直面的是复杂的人类社会与主观行为，社会现象本就无绝对真相，唯有不同视角下的合理解读。你那研究中难以剥离的价值取向，都会让同一议题在不同逻辑推导下走向截然相反的结论。更关键的是，社科评判观点的核心是论证的自洽与论据的支撑，没有唯一标准答案，这也让反向观点的表达有了充分的成立空间🤓 2周前·山东 1
Share Reply Yolo avatar Yolo As long as you want to write, you can create an in-depth report that is completely contrary in stance and viewpoint. At its core, this is because social sciences directly address the complex human society and subjective behavior. Social phenomena inherently have no absolute truth, only reasonable interpretations from different perspectives. The value orientation that is difficult to detach from your research will lead the same issue to different conclusions under different logical deductions. More importantly, the core of evaluating viewpoints in social sciences is the coherence of the argument and the support of the evidence. There is no single correct answer, which also gives ample space for the expression of opposing viewpoints 🤓 2 weeks ago · Shandong 1

分享 回复 向左头像 向左 对于比较贫穷的家庭来说，拼一拼的志气还是有必要的。阶级的跨越就是需要一代一代人的托举的，我们走到了这里，可能很多人觉得自己只是普通人，但我觉得已经很好了，更多事情就交给下一代。但是普通人没有拼搏的主观意识，其实连解决温饱的普通人都难以做到。 6天前·广东 1
Share Reply Left avatar Left For poorer families, the spirit of striving is still necessary. Overcoming class barriers requires the support of generations. We’ve reached this point, and many might feel like just ordinary people, but I think that’s already good enough. Let more things be left to the next generation. However, ordinary people lack the subjective awareness to strive. In fact, even ordinary people struggling to make ends meet find it hard to achieve. 6 days ago · Guangdong 1

分享 回复 肥仔物语9527头像 肥仔物语9527 我老板的儿子 请一节私教课的钱 都够我两个月工资了 没有可比性了！！！ 1周前·上海 2
Share Reply Fat Boy Story 9527 avatar Fat Boy Story 9527 My boss’s son The price of one private lesson is enough for my two months’ salary There’s no comparison anymore!!! 1 week ago · Shanghai 2

分享 回复 李继茹头像 李继茹 他们那有多厉害？无非是有资源有平台，所谓性格品质，亦无非是环境的产物。 2周前·广东 4
Share Reply Li Jiru avatar Li Jiru How amazing are they? It’s nothing more than having resources and platforms, and what’s called personality and quality are nothing more than products of the environment. 2 weeks ago · Guangdong 4

分享
Share

木木那个点头像 木木那个点 @晨惶恐 这个你看不了吗宝宝 4天前·浙江 0
Mumu that profile picture Mumu that point @Chen Awestruck This is something you can’t see, baby? 4 days ago · Zhejiang 0

泄露一个可能让我折寿的普通人改运说明书 2026-01-10 阅读需要13分钟 你有没有感觉到在我们看不见的地方，似乎有一股无形力量在操控这我们的命运！
Leak a possible life-shortening ordinary person’s fortune-telling manual 2026-01-10 Reading takes 13 minutes Do you feel that in places invisible to us, there seems to be an invisible force manipulating our fate!

我不想让你觉得我说的很玄乎，但是如果你不了解你的命运到底是怎么运作的，很有可能会导致你一生碌碌无为，贫困潦倒，遭遇厄运的打击！
I don’t want you to think what I’m saying is outlandish, but if you don’t understand how your destiny actually works, it could very well lead to a life of mediocrity, poverty, and being struck by misfortune!

由于你对于命运一无所知，毫无经验，而让你在现实世界里的处处碰壁，你会遇到各种人生困境麻烦，迷茫，不知如何上岸，
Because you know nothing about destiny and have no experience, you will constantly run into obstacles in the real world, facing various life difficulties, troubles, confusion, and not knowing how to get back on track,

你能看到这里，说明我们有缘，在此文中，我会泄露一个可能让我折寿的改运说明书，
The fact that you can see this here means we are destined to cross paths. In this article, I will reveal a fate-altering manual that might just cost me years off my life,

我相信你看完之后，一定会让你醍醐灌顶，从宇宙天地的视角俯瞰你整个命运的运转方式，让你做到生而知之，从人生困境之中脱离出来，逆天改命，
I believe after reading this, it will open your eyes to the universe, allowing you to view the workings of your entire destiny from a cosmic perspective, enabling you to understand life’s challenges intuitively and break free from them, defying fate

由于本文透露了很多人间天机，砸了很多资本主义的饭碗，可能会被下架，你最好能尽快保持收藏！
As this article reveals many human secrets and shakes many capitalist jobs, it may be taken down. You’d better keep collecting it as soon as possible!

何为命运？
What is destiny?

你想要改命，你必须先明白什么是命运？
If you want to change your destiny, you must first understand what destiny is.

我给命运下了一个定义：
I have defined destiny as:

命运就是人一生中，由外到内，
Fate is the degree of perception and experience from the outside to the inside in a person’s life,

从身体接触到的外界人事物的感知体验程度，
from the sensory experience of external people and things that the body comes into contact with,

被大脑接收后，再从大脑对外界人事物评判的好与坏体验，
which is then received by the brain and evaluated by the brain as good or bad experiences with external people and things,

最后在到灵魂觉醒明性见心的体验程度，
finally reaching the experience of awakening the soul, understanding the nature, and seeing the heart

三个环节的不同体验程度的持久性加起来就是你的命运。
The persistence of the different levels of experience in these three stages adds up to your destiny.

怎么去理解呢？
How can we understand this?

简单来说，我们每个人的命运都是由「身体、大脑、灵魂*」*控制程度的好坏来决定你生命体验的好坏，所以…
Simply put, the quality of our life experience is determined by how well our ‘body, brain, and soul*‘ are controlled, so…

接下来需要弄清楚这三个东西到底是什么？
Next, we need to figure out what these three things actually are?

才能解开你的命运是如何运转的！
The way your destiny works can only be unlocked!

我敢保证，接下来我的分享，一定会让你发出惊叹，颠覆你的认知，因为这是你以前从未听过的天机，而且是真正的天机。
I dare to guarantee that the sharing I will do next will definitely make you amazed, subvert your cognition, because this is the divine mystery you have never heard before, and it is the true divine mystery.

首先，身体是什么？
First, what is the body?

就是人身体的眼耳鼻舌身肤，它们的功能就是对外界的色声香味触等污染物进行接收，取向，就像摄像头的取景器一样，接收后就产生了眼识，耳识 鼻识 舌识 身识.
It is the eyes, ears, nose, tongue, body, and skin of a human body. Their function is to receive and orient external pollutants such as color, sound, smell, taste, and touch, just like a camera’s viewfinder. After receiving, it produces eye-consciousness, ear-consciousness, nose-consciousness, tongue-consciousness, and body-consciousness.

那么大脑是什么？
What is the brain?

表面看是个器官，但实际上在大脑里面储存着两种意识，一种显意识和潜意识，他在无形的操控着我们的身体！
On the surface, it’s an organ, but in reality, the brain stores two types of consciousness: conscious and subconscious, which invisibly control our bodies!

两种意识就包括人的
These two types of consciousness include a person’s

第六识—意识，
Sixth Consciousness—Consciousness

第七识—末那识，
The Seventh Consciousness—Avidya (Ignorance),

第八识—阿赖耶识。
The Eighth Consciousness—Alaya (Store) Consciousness.

第六识意识，主要负责每天对外界六尘世俗的人事物进行分析，判断，得出的好坏，得失，利弊等结论。
The Sixth Consciousness—Mind, primarily responsible for analyzing, judging, and drawing conclusions about the six senses and worldly phenomena every day.

第七识末那识，负责让你产生反应，采取行动，就是指挥你向外抓取，满足各种欲望需求的，
The Seventh Consciousness—Avidya (Ignorance), responsible for generating reactions and taking action, essentially directing you to grasp outwardly and satisfy various desires and needs.

第八识阿赖耶识，
The eighth consciousness, Alaya consciousness,

专门帮你记录你每天所做的一举一动，记录多了，时间久了，就变成你的业力系统，它威力最大，能操控你招感和投射你的现实世界。
is specifically designed to record every action you take every day. The more it records, the longer the time passes, and it gradually becomes your karmic system. It is the most powerful, capable of controlling your perception and projecting your reality.

那么最后一个灵魂是什么？
So, what is the last soul?

就是在大脑内部有个器官叫做松果体，它的作用就是用来觉醒开悟，用来链接宇宙母体最高位智慧的接收器。
It is an organ inside the brain called the pineal gland. Its function is to awaken and enlighten, serving as a receiver that connects to the highest level of universal mother wisdom.

如果你能激活你的松果体，你的第九识阿摩罗识就会启动工作，你就会变得超级有智慧有能量，大彻大悟无所不能，如有神助。
If you can activate your pineal gland, your ninth consciousness, the Alaya consciousness, will start to work, and you will become super wise and energetic, fully enlightened and all-powerful, as if aided by the divine.

这就是我们人类的身体，大脑，灵魂，三个部位的功能讲解！
This is the explanation of the functions of our human body, brain, and soul!

也就是我们经常说的身心灵修行，其实修的就是身体大脑灵魂这三个东西在现实世界中发挥的作用，
This is also what we often refer to as the practice of body, mind, and spirit; in reality, it is the practice of how the body, brain, and soul function in the real world,

经过我这次讲解，是不是颠覆了你对以往身心灵的认知啊？
After my explanation this time, has it overturned your previous understanding of body, mind, and spirit?

好了，接下来是最重要的关键，
Alright, next comes the most important key,

【身心灵】三个东西是怎么运作的？
How do the three things of body, mind, and spirit work?

是怎么影响我们的命运的？
How do they affect our destiny?

为什么有的人活的很苦逼，越活越下坠，到底问题出在哪里？
Why do some people live very miserably, constantly sinking, where exactly is the problem?

你弄懂这个问题后，你能一眼看穿一个人的命运链条，同时你对自己的命运掌握了如指掌。从此不再迷茫的活着，你能找到一种属于你的活法！
After you understand this issue, you can see through a person’s chain of fate at a glance, while you have a firm grasp of your own fate. From then on, you won’t live in confusion anymore, and you can find a way of living that belongs to you!

说到人应该怎么正确的活着，
When it comes to how a person should live correctly,

还得从你刚出生的时候讲起，你应该对我下面的结论没有异议：
it should start from the time you were just born. You should have no objection to the following conclusion:

就是作为婴儿时候的我们，大脑是一片空白的，没有一丝恶业习气，非常纯净，在道德经中也强调让人们回归婴儿状态，
That as infants, our brains were blank, free of any evil karma or habits, and extremely pure. The Tao Te Ching also emphasizes the importance of returning to the state of an infant.

老子认为婴儿的状态就是一无所念，无欲无求，无我无为，这种状态最符合道，是最幸福，最快乐，最接近生命本真状态的，
Laozi believed that the state of an infant is one of having no thoughts, no desires, no ego, and no striving, and this state is most in harmony with the Dao, the happiest, the most joyful, and the closest to the authentic state of life.

但是随着时间的推移，我们长大成人以后，就接受了社会的各种洗脑污染，
However, as time passes, after we grow into adults, we are exposed to various forms of societal brainwashing and pollution,

小时候开始被父母，原生家庭影响，后来在学校，被老师同学朋友，和社会价值观集体影响。
starting from childhood, influenced by parents and our original families, then in school, influenced by teachers, classmates, friends, and collective social values.

在这种极度污染的环境下生存，我们的的眼耳鼻舌身，五种感知不停的被外界物欲横飞的色相刺激和引诱，
Living in such an extremely polluted environment, our five senses—eyes, ears, nose, tongue, and body—are constantly stimulated and lured by the dazzling external material desires and appearances.

什么金钱，车子，房子，包包，首饰，各种你想要的，你觉得好的东西，
What money, cars, houses, bags, jewelry, and all the things you desire,

都在被你的第六识意识接收，和在第七识末那识的共同作用下，指挥你的身体不停的动起来，去抓取，去买买买，要要要，
are all received by your sixth sense consciousness, and under the joint effect of the seventh sense alaya consciousness, they direct your body to keep moving, to grab, to buy buy buy, to want want want,

慢慢的你会对这些好东西升起了执着心，攀缘心，妄想心，我必须要买房子，必须要搞到一辆车，我必须搞到钱，就出现这种心态，
Slowly, you will develop attachment, craving, and delusion towards these good things. You will think, “I must buy a house,” “I must get a car,” “I must get money,” and such mindsets will arise,

就会导致一个结果，由于你的执念太重，社会价值观洗脑太厉害，你对物质的追求已经形成了你的固化思维。
which will lead to a result. Due to your heavy attachment, the intense brainwashing of social values, and your pursuit of materialism having formed your fixed mindset.

对金钱追求的执念，对结婚追求的执念，对反房子车子追求的执念，对负债还债的执念，你被各种执念束缚着，
The obsession with pursuing money, the obsession with pursuing marriage, the obsession with chasing houses and cars, the obsession with repaying debts, you are bound by various obsessions,

可是世界的本质就是无常的，成住坏空生住异灭的，到生命终点一定会全部消失，你不会一直抓取到，或者抓取到了，很快的又会失去，
But the nature of the world is impermanent, coming, dwelling, decaying, and perishing, it will all disappear at the end of life, you won’t be able to hold onto it forever, or if you do, you will quickly lose it again,

在这种变化无常的物质现实世界中，你的分别心，执着心，妄想心，经常被伤害，经常得不到满足，一个人一定会生出贪嗔痴慢疑五毒，
In this ever-changing material world, your discriminating mind, clinging mind, deluded mind is often hurt, often unsatisfied, a person will definitely give rise to the five poisons of greed, hatred, delusion, arrogance, and doubt,

你想想是不是，买到了车子你就会继续贪更多，买更多东西，如果得不到没买到，你就会嗔恨，各种抱怨怨恨，
Do you think so? If you buy a car, you will continue to be greedy for more, buying more things. If you don’t get what you want, you will be filled with anger, various complaints and resentments

所以5毒的出现，必定又会生出喜怒忧思悲恐惊这七种情绪。有钱了就获得短暂的大喜，没钱就会焦虑，恐惧，匮乏！
So the emergence of the Five Poisons will inevitably give rise to the seven emotions of joy, anger, worry, pensiveness, grief, fear, and shock. When you have wealth, you gain temporary great joy; when you lack money, you become anxious, fearful, and feel lacking!

所以五毒和七情就是人之所以烦恼，焦虑，痛苦，恐惧的来源， 随着你进入社会的时间越久，你经历结交的人越多，
Therefore, the Five Poisons and the Seven Emotions are the sources of human 烦恼, anxiety, suffering, and fear. As you spend more time in society and interact with more people,

做的事越多，你所有每天冒出的念头，语言，行动都会被当成作业储存在你的第八识阿赖耶识，作业累积越来越多，就形成一股力量，叫业力。
the more things you do, the more thoughts, words, and actions you generate every day will be stored as karma in your eighth consciousness, the Alaya. As karma accumulates, it forms a force called karmic force.

最后，你的业力系统会彻底掌管你的身体，不受你控制的指挥你去做事，直到把你推动到一条你看不到未来无明黑暗的道路上苦苦挣扎，你根本无能为力，
Finally, your karmic system will completely take control of your body, commanding you to do things without your control, until it pushes you onto a path of blind struggle in the darkness of ignorance, where you are utterly helpless.

难以逃脱。 这条路你走的时间越长，五毒七情等负能量越生越多，越积越厚，到了一定因缘和合下，一定会积攒出一个大大的灾祸。
Hard to escape. The longer you walk this path, the more negative energy like the Five Poisons and Seven Emotions grows, accumulating and thickening. Under certain conditions of cause and effect, a great disaster will inevitably accumulate.

可能是一场很难治愈的大病，或者是一笔还清的巨额债务，也可能是刑事案件，牢狱之灾， 在极端情况下，厄运会连续发生。
It could be a very difficult-to-cure major illness, or a huge debt to be repaid, or even criminal cases, imprisonment. In extreme cases, misfortune may occur consecutively.

有一些身弱之人，如果经不住打击，可能就这样玩完了，而一部分人，在这条道路上尝遍苦头之后，他开始后知后觉，发现这是在提醒他寻找一条更好的道路去走，内心会被一股神性意识和光明呼唤着牵引着，
There are some physically weak individuals who, if they cannot withstand the blows, might finish off this way. While some people, after tasting all the hardships on this path, begin to realize belatedly that this is a reminder to seek a better path. Their hearts are pulled and guided by a divine consciousness and the light,

但恰巧大多数人自身能量太弱，又感知不到，被多年驯化的大脑禁锢了，根本抵抗不了，所以只有少部分人能走出来，
but unfortunately, most people’s own energy is too weak and they fail to perceive it. Their brains, long domesticated, constrain them, making it impossible for them to resist. So only a small number of people can break free.

另一种原因，他们认不清造成一切痛苦的原因和不知如何摆脱困境的高维智慧，不知如何上岸，继续浑浑噩噩，得过且过的度过余生。
Another reason, they cannot recognize the higher-dimensional wisdom that causes all suffering and doesn’t know how to escape the predicament, doesn’t know how to get ashore, and continues to drift through life, just getting by.

这就是身心灵运行方式，它掌控我们每个人命运的路径，我敢说有90%的人都是被六根，8识，8苦，12因缘，五毒，七情，业力操控着，
This is how the body, mind, and spirit operate; it controls the path of our destinies. I dare say that 90% of people are controlled by the six senses, the eight consciousnesses, the eight sufferings, the twelve causes and conditions, the five poisons, the seven emotions, and karmic forces.

在这张庞大的命运大网中，不同程度，或多或少承受着痛苦，焦虑恐惧带来的折磨。
In this vast web of destiny, people to varying degrees bear the torment of pain, anxiety, and fear.

说实话，我写文案写到这里时，我内心感到心酸，眼泪一直在眼眶打转，回忆过去人生往事，我又何尝不是这样度过呢？
Honestly, when I was writing the copy up to this point, my heart ached, and tears kept welling up in my eyes. Reflecting on past life events, how could I not have gone through the same thing?

我想应该还有千千万万个人在黑暗里挣扎吧，他们可能都是为生活打拼的平凡人。
I suppose there must be countless others struggling in the darkness, they might all be ordinary people striving for a living.

在人生短短几十年，生命的旅程如此短暂，你应该过得如此悲苦吗？
In the short span of a few decades of life, the journey of life is so brief, should you be living in such sorrow?

我发自内心的恳求你一定要选择一条光明快乐的道路活着，那就是全面了解以上讲的身心灵的运作方式，
I sincerely implore you to definitely choose a path of light and joy to live, that is to fully understand the operating principles of body, mind, and spirit as mentioned above,

以及熟练掌握我下面分享的
and to skillfully master what I will share below.

改运说明书
说明书 on Changing Fortune

普通人应该怎么改运？
How should ordinary people change their fortune?

你开始要通过内观，冥想，数息，布施，断舍离等等法门去进行长期刻意练习，收拾好你的身口意，停止造作更多五毒七情，先断掉你烦恼痛苦的来源，
You must begin through introspection, meditation, counting breaths, practicing charity, detachment from material possessions, and other methods, engaging in long-term deliberate practice. Tidy up your body, speech, and mind, stop creating more of the five poisons and seven emotions, and first cut off the source of your 烦恼痛苦 (anxiety and suffering).

目的就是斩断业力对你的束缚，打破12因缘循环轮回，帮你重新建设一套符合天地宇宙规律法则的内心世界和生命体验。
The purpose is to sever the bindings of karma on you, break the cycle of the 12 causes and conditions, and help you rebuild an inner world and life experience that align with the laws of the universe.

当你修炼到能轻松控制你的六根和8识的造作，让他们乖乖听话，不在指挥你，不在生出五毒七情，内心保持平静状态，那么你i的松果体就会打开，
When you have cultivated to the point where you can easily control your six senses and the eight consciousnesses, making them obedient and not commanding you, not giving rise to the five poisons and seven emotions, and maintaining a peaceful state of mind, then your pineal gland will open,

第九识阿摩罗识，开始启动运转，你的神性意识觉知自动接管控制你的身体，这个时候你就会成为你命运的主人！
The ninth consciousness, the Amalokakshita, will begin to activate and operate, and your divine consciousness awareness will automatically take over the control of your body. At this point, you will become the master of your destiny!

因为你的松果体，阿摩罗识本身就具备了宇宙最高维智慧和能量，你可以无限下载智慧能量来加持你，
Because your pineal gland and the Amalokakshita inherently possess the highest dimensional wisdom and energy of the universe, you can infinitely download wisdom and energy to empower you,

你会过的超级爽，超级开心，超级幸福，超级有力量，内心充满光明，富足，宁静，笃定、你做什么事都如有神助，
You will live an incredibly enjoyable, happy, fulfilling, and powerful life, with your heart filled with light, abundance, tranquility, and certainty. Whatever you do will be as if helped by a divine power

你再也不会被恐惧、焦虑，怨恨，算计支配着去做事， 你会发现什么定目标，设计划，做预期，都是扰乱你神性力量为你做出最好的安排，它们只会拉你进低维的视角去做事，
You will no longer be dominated by fear, anxiety, resentment, or calculation in your actions, and you will realize that setting goals, planning, and making expectations are all disruptions to your divine power, which arranges the best for you. They only pull you into a lower-dimensional perspective to act,

你只需跟随神性意识觉知的指引，你去思考内观，扫除一切妄念，
You only need to follow the guidance of your divine consciousness, think introspectively, and eliminate all delusions,

不断擦亮心中的爱，良知、责任，使命，心神合一的做事，就会有一股神秘自然力，让你的生命毫不费力的发生各种奇迹。
constantly polishing the love in your heart, conscience, responsibility, and mission, acting with heart and mind united, and a mysterious natural force will then effortlessly bring various miracles into your life.

你做什么都很快乐，你做什么像什么，做什么成什么，这就是你选择一条光明的中道、正道之后，你忠于自己的灵魂所给你带来的惊天巨变。
Whatever you do, you will be happy, whatever you do, you will become like it, and whatever you do, it will be accomplished. This is the earth-shattering transformation brought to you by your loyalty to your soul after choosing the bright and upright middle path, which is the result of your devotion to your own soul.

你在这个过程中失去的只是一个让你备受痛苦折磨的假我、小我，你得到的是一个喜悦、富足、丰盛、如有神助的真我、本我。
You only lose a false self, a lesser self, that has been tormented by suffering in this process; you gain a true self, an essential self that is joyful, abundant, and blessed.

所以命运是什么呀？
So what is destiny?

就是一种生命体验，你的生命体验好与坏就在与你的修行程度，有的人没有修行，
It is simply a life experience, and whether your life experience is good or bad depends on your level of cultivation. Some people do not cultivate,

他的生命体验全是负面的、混乱的、五毒俱全、邪思妄念泛滥的状态，但我希望你做一个觉悟者，把你生命体验提升到另一个高度，
and their life experience is entirely negative, chaotic, filled with the five poisons, and overwhelmed with evil thoughts and delusions. But I hope you become an awakened one, elevating your life experience to a higher level.

纯净到只剩下慈悲、快乐、平静、专注、奉献、无私的状态、在这种状态下去做事，去利益众生，
A state of purity that remains only with compassion, happiness, peace, focus, dedication, and selflessness; doing things in this state, benefiting all beings

你一定会变得富足有钱，就怕你还在听从大脑的指挥，各种评判五毒出来搅乱，阻碍你的内心，让你继续无明愚迷的颠倒活着！
and you will definitely become rich and prosperous. The only fear is that you are still following the commands of your brain, with various judgments and the five poisons arising to disturb and obstruct your inner self, allowing you to continue living in ignorance and delusion!

我本人呢，也正在一直践行上面我所讲的，也在不停的验证这些美好的变化。生活里天天出现大大小小的奇迹，
I myself have been putting into practice what I’ve been saying and continuously verifying these wonderful changes. Everyday in life, there are small and big miracles appearing,

那么现在的问题是，你能看懂吗？
So the question is, can you understand it?

你相信吗？你有决心去升级一个 更加高级的灵魂吗？
Do you believe? Do you have the determination to upgrade a more advanced soul?

你准备，迎接一个全新生命旅程了吗？
Are you ready to welcome a completely new life journey?

你愿意让自己的生命更着更有品质吗？
Would you like to make your life more of higher quality?

非常感谢你能看完，写文案不容易，小小的请求，希望你能点赞并收藏一下，让更多处于无名的人看到光，让我们的世界变得更加美好！
Thank you very much for reading this far. Writing copy is not easy, so I have a small request: I hope you can like and save it, so that more unknown people can see the light, and make our world a better place!

我是周雨此生大愿：
I am Zhou Yu, my life’s great wish:

祈盼众生觉醒开悟，
May all beings awaken and realize enlightenment

明心见性，妄尽还原，
See the mind, see the nature; when illusions are extinguished, the original self returns

破幻归真，转识成智，
Break through illusions to return to the true self, transform perception into wisdom

离苦得乐，真心妙用，
離苦得樂，真心妙用，

内圣外王，涅槃重生！
Inner sanctity, outer sovereignty, rebirth in Nirvana!

愿人世间变得更美好！

May the world become better!

如果岸是虚构的，我们为什么还要考研考公 2025-12-19 阅读需要7分钟 你若曾见过考研考公的考场，你会发现那里和高考完全不同。
If the shore is fictional, why do we still need to take the postgraduate entrance exam and the civil service exam 2025-12-19 Reading takes 7 minutes If you have ever seen the exam hall of the postgraduate entrance exam and the civil service exam, you will find that it is completely different from the college entrance exam.

没有鲜花、拥抱与掌声，没有尖叫、奔跑与泪水。
No flowers, hugs, or applause, no screams, running, or tears.

有的只是肃穆，我觉得用“肃穆”这个词再合适不过。
Only solemnity, I think the word “solemnity” is the most appropriate.

高考是在热烈的夏天，那是少年的战场，连汗水都透着躁动。
The college entrance exam takes place in the scorching summer, that’s the battlefield for teenagers, even the sweat smells of restlessness.

而在这个渐凉的冬日里，我们咀嚼着冷空气，或许有些地方已经下了雪。那我们便踩着那初雪走出一条道来，后面的人势必会低头跟着前面人的脚步。
And in this gradually cooling winter, we chew on the cold air, perhaps some places have already snowed. Then we will step on the first snow to create a path, and those behind will inevitably follow the footsteps of those in front.

此时，若以高角度镜头俯瞰，那会是白茫茫天地间一道沉默的黑。
At this moment, if viewed from a high-angle shot, it would be a silent black in the white and boundless world.

我们带着这肃穆，朝圣般奔向不可知的未来。
We carry this solemnity, running towards the unknown future as if on a pilgrimage.

图片描述
Image Description

如果说一个学校有30个考场，每个考场有30个考生，那便是900人的命运交响。
If a school has 30 examination halls and each hall has 30 candidates, it is a symphony of fate for 900 people.

若按照考公100:1的报录比，那么这乌泱泱的人群里，只有9个人能上所谓的“岸”，剩下的891人，将被重新推回冰冷的海水中。
If we follow the 100:1 application-to-position ratio for civil service exams, then only 9 people in this vast crowd can reach the so-called “shore,” while the remaining 891 people will be pushed back into the cold sea.

既然如此，我们为什么要在这冷冽中独自咀嚼未来？
Since this is the case, why should we alone chew on the future in this chill?

英国哲学家鲍曼说，我们生活在一个“液态现代性”的世界。
British philosopher Zygmunt Bauman says that we live in a world of “liquid modernity.”

一切都是流动的、不确定的。考研、考公、考编、工作、创业，……我们看似拥有许多选择，却在无尽的选项中逐渐失去了选择的能力，只剩下焦虑的自由。
Everything is fluid and uncertain. Exam preparations for postgraduate studies, civil service exams, teacher certification exams, jobs, entrepreneurship, and the like. We seem to have many choices, yet in the endless options, we gradually lose the ability to choose, leaving only the freedom of anxiety.

我们不知道到底该走哪一条路，我们不知道选择的那条路是否真的可以成功走下去。
We don’t know which path to take, and we don’t know if the path we choose can truly be successfully walked.

如果失败了该怎么办？是工作、二战还是回到自己的家乡？到时候还能找到好一些的工作吗？
What if we fail? Should we take a job, try again, or return to our hometown? Will we still be able to find better jobs then?

我们不知道。
We don’t know.

在这片波涛汹涌、随时可能把人淹没的汪洋里，考公考研，本质上是在寻找一块陆地。
In this turbulent, ever-ready-to-drown ocean, taking civil service exams and postgraduate entrance exams is essentially searching for a piece of land.

哪怕这块陆地是贫瘠的，哪怕它只是一个编制、一个学历，但它代表了固体，代表了在这个流动的世界里，我们可以抓住的一根浮木。
Even if this land is barren, even if it is just a position or an academic degree, it represents solidity. It represents a floating log we can grasp in this flowing world.

可是，我时常在想，有没有一种可能，我们本来就在岸上？
But I often wonder, is there a possibility that we are already on the shore?

是水稻驯服了人类，让我们被束缚在土地上。
It is rice that tames humans, binding us to the land.

是货币驯服了资本家，让他们成为利润的奴隶。
It is money that tames capitalists, making them slaves to profit.

是“编制”和“学历”驯服了原本自由奔跑的牛马。
It is “credentials” and “degrees” that tame the originally free-running oxen and horses.

社会是一个巨大的语言建构。
Society is a massive linguistic construct.

所谓的“国家”、“体制”、“学历”，不过是人类共同编织的想象网。
The so-called “nation,” “system,” “education,” are merely the webs of imagination woven together by humans.

我们被告知需要房子、车子、稳定的工作、社会的认可，却很少被教导去追问：这些需求有多少真正源于我们内心，又有多少是被植入的欲望？
We are told that we need houses, cars, stable jobs, and social recognition, yet rarely taught to question: How much of these needs truly stem from within us, and how much are implanted desires?

如果说房车、婚姻、工作是社会赋予我们的枷锁，那么我们拼命想要上岸，是否只是为了换一副更金贵的镣铐？
If houses, cars, marriage, and jobs are the shackles imposed on us by society, then are we desperately trying to reach the shore merely to exchange them for more expensive shackles?

世界试图将我们塑造成特定形状的零件，操纵者愿意为了维护好用的零件支付报酬。
The world tries to shape us into specific-shaped parts, and the manipulators are willing to pay to maintain useful parts.

如果只是为了做零件，这苦吃得太不值得。
It’s simply not worth enduring this hardship just to make parts.

但我们毕竟生活在这样一个真实的、粗砺的世界上。
But after all, we live in such a real, rough world.

我们的肉体是沉重的，我们的痛感是真实的。我们需要吃饭，需要尊严，需要那个叫“资本”的东西。
Our bodies are heavy, and our pain is real. We need to eat, we need dignity, we need that thing called “capital.”

《毛选》开篇问：“谁是我们的敌人？谁是我们的朋友？”
The opening of “Selected Works of Mao Zedong” asks: “Who are our enemies? Who are our friends?”

今天，在我们这场一个人的战场里，谁是敌人？
Today, in our solitary battlefield, who is the enemy?

是坐在你隔壁奋笔疾书的研友吗？是那个万分之一的录取率吗？是出题的老师吗？
Is it the study buddy sitting next to you, diligently writing? Is it the one-in-a-million admission rate? Is it the teacher who sets the exams?

都不是。
Neither.

真正的敌人，是那个试图让我们在液态中解体、让我们在随波逐流中失去形状的无力感。
The true enemy is that helplessness that tries to dissolve us in liquid, that makes us lose our shape in the flow of the tide.

真正的敌人，是当我们两手空空面对这个庞大机器时，那种没有筹码谈条件的赤裸感。
The true enemy is that bare feeling when we are empty-handed facing this huge machine, without any chips to bargain with.

真正的敌人，是在这个塑料袋飞得比鸟还高的时代里，我们的那种悬浮在半空的焦虑感。
The true enemy is that anxious feeling of floating in the air in this era where plastic bags fly higher than birds.

所以，回到最初的问题，我们考研考公是为了什么？
So, going back to the original question, why do we take the postgraduate entrance exam and the civil service exam?

如果“岸”是虚构的，但在风暴中拥有一个锚点，却是真实的。
If “the shore” is fictional, but having an anchor in the storm is real.

我们在这绝望之绝望中寻觅的，从来不是那个名为“研究生”或“公务员”的标签。
What we have been seeking in this despair of despair has never been the label of “graduate student” or “civil servant.”

我们在寻觅建造一艘船的资格。
What we are seeking is the qualification to build a ship.

这艘船，能让我们在未来某个时刻，当世界试图将我们随意揉捏成某个形状时，我们有底气说：“不，我有我的航向。”
This ship, one that will allow us at some point in the future, when the world tries to arbitrarily squeeze us into a certain shape, to confidently say, “No, I have my own course.”

我们此时此刻在寒风中的每一次背诵，每一道习题，不是为了向这个世界投降，不是为了心甘情愿地成为一颗更高级的螺丝钉。
Every recitation we make in the cold wind at this moment, every exercise we solve, is not to surrender to this world, not to willingly become a higher-level screw.

恰恰相反，我们是为了在这个巨大的、轰鸣的、试图同化一切的浪潮面前，赎回那个哪怕只有一丁点自由的自己。
On the contrary, we are here to redeem that even slightly free self before the huge, roaring tide that tries to assimilate everything.

这便是我们在茫茫大雪中，排成那道沉默黑线的意义：
This is the meaning of forming that silent black line in the vast snow:

我们不是在乞求上岸，我们是在亲手铸造龙骨。
We are not begging to be saved; we are forging the dragon’s spine with our own hands.

所以，先前的那个镜头变了。
So, the previous shot has changed.

当我们再次俯瞰那白茫茫天地间一道沉默的黑线时，我们看到的，不再是900个争夺9个位置的绝望赌徒。
When we look down again at the silent black line between the boundless white expanse of heaven and earth, what we see is no longer 900 desperate gamblers vying for 9 positions.

我们看到的是900个在语言的荒原与现实的洪流之间，试图用一笔一划，为自己搭建甲板的造船师。
What we see are 900 shipbuilders, trying to build a deck for themselves with every stroke, amidst the wasteland of language and the torrent of reality.

上岸，与其说是抵达终点，不如说是拥有了一个可以抗击风浪的船身。
To come ashore is rather to have a hull capable of withstanding storms than to reach the destination.

从此，你有了罗盘，有了舵轮，有了储备淡水的底舱。你或许依然要面对风暴的咆哮，但这一次，你不再随波逐流，你手中紧握着那可以掌控方向的舵柄。
From now on, you have a compass, a rudder, and a hold filled with fresh water reserves. You may still have to face the roars of the storm, but this time, you are no longer adrift; in your hands, you 紧握 the tiller that can control your direction.

相对于马斯洛那需要爬至塔尖才配拥有灵魂的金字塔，我们的人生更像是考夫曼的帆船，在茫茫大海中航行。
Compared to the pyramid that Maslow believed one had to climb to the top to deserve a soul, our lives are more like Kaufman’s sailboat, sailing in the vast sea.

主流叙事认为考研考公是向上走，但我在这里告诉大家，人生并没有真正的向上，只有向远方。
Mainstream narratives believe that taking the postgraduate entrance exam or the civil service exam is moving upwards, but I’m here to tell you that life doesn’t truly move upwards; it only moves towards the distance.

考研考公，是在打造坚固的船身。
Taking the postgraduate entrance exam or the civil service exam is about building a sturdy hull.

只有船身坚固（金钱、安全、自尊），我们才不会轻易沉没。
Only with a sturdy hull (money, security, self-esteem) will we not easily sink.

船身是必要的苟且，而帆是未来的诗。
The hull is the necessary compromise, while the sail is the poetry of the future.

没有帆的船，只是一具随波逐流的漂浮物；而没有船的帆，则注定是一场凄美的殉道。
A boat without a sail is merely a drifting object; without a boat, a sail is destined for a tragic and beautiful self-sacrifice.

什么是帆？帆是理想、是爱，它包含了曾为打造船而抵押至当铺的全部灵魂。
What is a sail? The sail is idealism, love, it contains the entire soul that was pawned to the pawn shop for building the boat.

帆，应是绝对真诚的，抛开所有生存性因素打造而成的。
The sail should be absolutely sincere, crafted without considering any survival factors.

我们现在的苦行，是为了让船身足够坚固，好让我们在未来的某一天，有资格升起那面属于自己的帆。
Our current ascetic practices are to make the hull strong enough so that one day in the future, we may be worthy of raising our own sail.

如果你暂时并没有找到自己的帆也没关系，暂时停泊的帆船不该被责怪。
If you haven’t found your sail yet, it’s alright. A temporarily moored sailboat should not be blamed.

只要脚下的船身还在，灵魂便不会发霉。
As long as the hull beneath our feet remains, the soul will not rot.

所以，去吧。
So, go forth.

在这片白茫茫的肃穆中，去拿回属于你们的龙骨，去造属于你们的船。
In this solemn white expanse, retrieve your dragon bones and build the ship that belongs to you.

风起的时候，我们海上见。

When the wind rises, we’ll meet at sea.

2026年必会的30个逆向思维 2026-01-07 阅读需要4分钟 1。先避坑，再找路：2026年，与其焦虑地寻找怎么成功，不如先列出”怎么做会失败”，然后坚决不做那些事。
Top 30 Reverse Thinking Skills You Must Master in 2026 2026-01-07 Reading time: 4 minutes 1. Avoid pitfalls first, then find the way: In 2026, instead of anxiously searching for how to succeed, list out “what will lead to failure” and then resolutely avoid those things.

2。慢就是快：不要急于求成。在开始疯狂努力前，先花时间把基础打牢，这能让你在下半年跑得更快。
2. Slow is fast: Don’t rush. Before going all-out, spend time solidifying your foundation, which will help you run faster in the second half of the year.

3。放弃”全能”幻想：承认自己不可能什么都做。在新的一年，敢于放弃次要目标，才能抓住最重要的机会。
3. Give up the “omniscient” fantasy: Acknowledge that you cannot do everything. In the new year, dare to abandon secondary goals to seize the most important opportunities.

4。把”我不会”改成”我暂时还没学会”：加上”暂时”两个字，你就拥有了成长型思维，这是2026年最好的心态。
4. Change “I won’t” to “I haven’t learned it yet”: Adding the word “yet” gives you a growth mindset, which is the best attitude for 2026.

5。与其改变别人，不如筛选环境：不要试图改变任何人，2026年，把精力花在寻找同频的人和事上。
5. Instead of changing others, filter your environment: Don’t try to change anyone. In 2026, focus your energy on finding people and things that resonate with you.

6。把缺点当特点：你认为的缺点(比如内向，固执)，换个角度看，可能是专注和深度思考的优势。
6. Treat flaws as features: What you consider flaws (such as introversion, stubbornness) might be strengths if you look at them from a different perspective, like focus and deep thinking.

7。利用”腐蚀”原理：坏事中往往藏着好事。遇到挫折，先别沮丧，问问自己：这件事能带来什么新的机会?
7. Utilize the principle of “corrosion”: Often, bad situations hide good opportunities. When facing setbacks, don’t get discouraged. Ask yourself: What new opportunities can this bring?

8。倒推人生：假设2026年底你想达成某个目标，从那个终点倒推，看看现在(1月)你应该做什么。
8. Reverse-engineer your life: Suppose you want to achieve a certain goal by the end of 2026. Work backward from that endpoint to see what you should do now (January).

9。欲擒故纵：无论是对人还是对事，有时候”松手”比”紧握”更能得到你想要的结果。
9. Let go to catch: Whether it’s with people or things, sometimes “letting go” is more effective than “holding tight” to get what you want.

10。成功是失败之母：警惕过去的成功经验。2026年环境在变，敢于打破过去的自己，才能重生。
10. Success is the mother of failure: Be wary of past successes. The environment is changing in 2026. Only by daring to break from your old self can you be reborn.

11。空杯心态：承认自己”一无所知”。只有杯子是空的，才能装进2026年的新知识。
11. Empty cup mentality: Acknowledge that you “know nothing.” Only when the cup is empty can it be filled with new knowledge from 2026.

12。不作为清单：比”待办清单”更重要的是”禁忌清单”。列出2026年你绝不再做的事情(比如熬夜，拖延)。
12. List of inaction: What matters more than a “to-do list” is a “don’t-do list.” List the things you will never do again in 2026 (such as staying up late, procrastinating).

13。战略性”躺平”：累了就休息。在2026年，把”休息”看作是一种恢复能量的战略，而不是懒惰。
13. Strategic “lying flat”: Rest when you’re tired. In 2026, view “rest” as a strategy to recharge rather than laziness.

14。不要问怎么赚钱：先问自己能为别人解决什么问题。利他，才是最好的利己。
14. Don’t ask how to make money: First ask yourself what problem you can solve for others. Altruism is the best form of self-interest.

15。先定价，再做产品：无论是工作还是个人发展，先确定你的价值，再去倒推你需要具备什么能力。
15. Price first, then product: Whether it’s for work or personal development, first determine your value, then work backward to figure out what skills you need.

16。做”不同”，不做”更好”：不要在红海里死磕，2026年，找到你独一无二的赛道。
16. Be “different,” not “better”: Don’t fight in the red ocean; by 2026, find your unique track.

17。把竞争对手当客户：你的同行往往最懂你的价值，试着从他们身上找到机会。
17. Treat competitors as customers: Your peers often understand your value the best. Try to find opportunities from them.

18。不要招”能人”：在组建团队或寻找伙伴时，价值观的契合比一时的能力更重要。
18. Don’t hire “stars”: When building a team or looking for partners, alignment in values is more important than immediate capabilities.

19。如果你想让别人讨厌你：就一直无底线地顺着TA.2026年，学会适当的拒绝，才能赢得正的尊重。
19. If you want others to dislike you: just keep going along with them without limits. In 2026, learn to refuse appropriately to earn genuine respect.

20。不要问”TA为什么不喜欢我”：要问”我不喜欢TA哪一点”。你讨厌别人的点，往往也是别人讨厌自己的点，这是一种提醒。
20. Don’t ask “Why don’t they like me?”: ask “What don’t I like about them?”. The points you dislike in others are often the same points they dislike about themselves, which is a reminder.

21。把”批评”包装成”期待”：想让别人改变，不要指责，要表达你对TA的期待，对方更容易接受。
21. Package “criticism” as “expectation”: If you want others to change, don’t blame them, express your expectations for them instead. They are more likely to accept it.

22。与其解释，不如表现：在新的一年，少说多做，用结果说话是最有力的反击。
22. It’s better to show than explain: In the new year, say less and do more. Using results to speak is the most powerful form of rebuttal.

23。反过来想，总是反过来想：这是查理。芒格的智慧。想不清问题时，就反过来想。
23. Conversely, always think in reverse: This is Charlie Munger’s wisdom. When you can’t figure out a problem, think in reverse.

24。如果我知道我会死在哪里：我就永远不去那里。找出你人生中最大的风险点，坚决避开。
24. If I knew where I would die, I would never go there. Identify the biggest risks in your life and avoid them decisively.

25。人弃我取，人取我予：在大家都恐慌或疯狂时，保持冷静，进行反周期的操作。
25. When others abandon, I take; when others take, I give: Stay calm and perform counter-cycle operations when everyone is panicking or going crazy.

26。把”顾客是上帝”变成”顾客是学生”：你懂什么，就去教育别人什么，创造需求比满足需求更有价值。
26. Change “The customer is God” to “The customer is a student”: Teach others what you know, creating demand is more valuable than meeting demand.

27。把”绊脚石”当”垫脚石”：遇到的每一个困难，都是让你站得更高的台阶。
27. Treat “stumbling block” as “stepping stone”: Every difficulty you encounter is a step that helps you stand taller.

28。先解决心情，再解决事情：情绪上头时，什么都别做。冷静下来，问题往往就解决了一半。
28. Address your mood before tackling tasks: When emotions run high, don’t do anything. Once you calm down, the problem is often half-solved.

29。司马光砸缸：当别人都在想”人离水”(把人从水里救出来)，你要想”水离人”(砸破缸)。解决问题，不一定非要正面硬刚。
29. Sima Guang breaking the jar: While others think of “man away from water” (saving the person from the water), you should think of “water away from man” (breaking the jar). Problem-solving doesn’t always require a direct confrontation.

30。2026年，你就是自己的光：不要总是等待别人的指引。向内求索，你的智慧和勇气，足以照亮前行的路。

30. In 2026, you are your own light: Don’t always wait for others to guide you. Seek within, and your wisdom and courage are enough to illuminate the path ahead.

河南县城高中学生的累 2026-01-14 阅读需要12分钟 我去年写过一篇《河南县城某学校高中生一日生活举例》，里面记载了我在高中时的一日流程及想法。但高中的苦难无限，篇幅有限，总归是阐之未尽的。今天这篇文章整理自我和我正读高三的妹妹的一次谈心。她在高三的压力与学校集中营的制度压迫里挣扎煎熬，开始追问人生的意义。我理解她。故而有此篇文章。
The Burden of High School Students in Henan County 2026-01-14 Reading time: 12 minutes Last year, I wrote an article titled “A Day in the Life of High School Students in a Henan County School,” which recorded my daily routine and thoughts during high school. However, the hardships of high school are limitless, and with limited space, it was inevitably incomplete. Today’s article is compiled from a conversation I had with my younger sister, who is currently in her senior year of high school. She is struggling and agonizing under the pressure of senior year and the oppressive system of the school, which has led her to question the meaning of life. I understand her. That is why I wrote this article.

前段时间，网上有一个“嘉豪”的梗。所谓的嘉豪，是指学生阶段行为抽象、举止怪诞，以标榜自己特立独行的一些男生。女生则叫嘉欣。但在山河四省的县城高中，如能出一个嘉豪嘉欣这样的人，那是校宝级别的存在。他们居然没有被体制所同化，没有被题海所淹没。在那样的高中里，还能保持自己的个性，那不是嘉豪，那是真正的老艺术家。
Recently, there was a meme online called “Jiahao.” The so-called Jiahao refers to boys who exhibit eccentric behavior and an abstract demeanor during their student years, trying to portray themselves as unique. Girls are called Jiaxin. But in the county high schools of the four provinces of mountains and rivers, if someone like Jiahao or Jiaxin appears, they are considered treasures of the school. They have not been assimilated by the system, nor have they been drowned in the sea of exams. In such high schools, they can still maintain their individuality. That’s not just Jiahao; they are true old artists.

我读高二时，前排的一个男生在一个课间突然告诉我们，他只有一个蛋。他说的很煞有介事，相当认真，这引起了我们一众男生的浓烈兴趣。他还在宿舍翻出来给大家看，露出来的这颗蛋明显比大家的大，以至于大家觉得他一个蛋就这么大，只有一个也很合理了。蛋哥真乃奇人也。
When I was in my sophomore year, a boy in front of me suddenly told us during a break that he only had one testicle. He said it very seriously, and it 引起了 us a group of boys great interest. He even took it out in the dorm to show everyone. The testicle he exposed was clearly larger than everyone else’s, to the point where everyone thought it was reasonable that he only had one testicle that big. Brother Egg is truly a strange person.

那两天课上课下的话题都是在讨论这件事，闹得隔壁几个班也都知道了。甚至引得有些女生也对此饶有兴趣。但实际上，我们并不是真的关心他有几个蛋，也不明白他为什么要告诉我们这件事。但蛋哥用一句话，就引爆了我们近一周的热门话题，这就转移了我们被集中营环境鞭笞的注意力，让我们重新短暂地意识到了，我们这个年龄段本该有的兴致与活力。
For those two days, both in and out of class, the topic of discussion was this incident, and it even spread to several neighboring classes. It even piqued the interest of some girls. In reality, we were not really concerned about how many testicles he had, nor did we understand why he told us this. But with just one sentence, Brother Egg ignited a hot topic for us for nearly a week, shifting our attention away from the 鞭笞 of the camp environment and allowing us to briefly realize the enthusiasm and vitality that our age should have.

同样是高二，我再次因为没赶上五点二十的早读而迟到，被年级主任扣量化分外加言语批评。同我一起挨批的还有数十个男生。主任恨铁不成钢，越说越激动，说你们如果再迟到，就不配在这个学校待着，就赶紧滚出去吧。话音刚落，我们队伍中就有一个男生往校门方向飞奔而去，留下了震惊的我们和错愕的主任。门卫大爷都没反应过来，那哥们就一溜烟飞了出去。主任连忙招呼几个男老师去追。据说在离学校三四公里的南水北调桥边，才把那哥们追了回来。问他为什么跑，他说主任让他滚出学校，他听命行事罢了。或许是介于他刚好跑到南水北调桥的缘故，那哥们事后居然没有受到任何处罚。此事也被我们传为美谈。
The same year I was in junior high, I was late again for the early reading session at 5:20 a.m. and was deducted points and criticized by the principal for it. Along with me, dozens of boys were reprimanded. The principal, frustrated with their lack of improvement, grew increasingly agitated, saying that if they were late again, they didn’t deserve to be in the school and should just leave. As soon as he finished speaking, one of the boys in our group sprinted towards the school gate, leaving us shocked and the principal stunned. The security guard hadn’t even reacted when that guy had already dashed out. The principal quickly called for a few male teachers to chase after him. It was said that they caught him near the South-to-North Water Diversion Bridge, about three or four kilometers away from the school. When asked why he ran, he said the principal told him to leave the school, and he was just following orders. Perhaps because he had run all the way to the bridge, he ended up facing no punishment afterward. This incident became a legendary tale among us.

像蛋哥和飞哥这样的奇人做出的诸如此类事情还有很多，但因为这样的事过于离谱和抽象，根本无法言说，也无法通报批评。他们也并没有违反量化考核上列举的那些内容，属于是无法选中。只留下传奇事迹在学校流传并引得人暗自赞叹。
There are many more bizarre and abstract things like this done by eccentric figures like Egg Brother and Flying Brother, but because such events are too far-fetched and abstract, they are impossible to describe or report for criticism. They also didn’t violate any of the items listed in the quantitative assessment, making them unselectable. Only their legendary deeds remain 流传 in the school, drawing quiet admiration from others.

但随着年级的递增，像蛋哥和飞哥这种没有被异化的、有青春生命活力的人就越来越少了。他们仅用一句话，或是一种行为，就能瞬间搅动高中那潭枯燥乏味的死水。这并不是因为他们能量大，而是因为死水太死，做出一点风吹草动和特立独行，都可以被冠称为是老艺术家的从容。但其实这点整活儿量，在我初中（乡中）根本就不够看的。可惜昙花一现，他们很快就像昂头的黑奴和跃起的地鼠一样，被鞭子或锤子给打压下去了，或是被同化掉了。
However, as the grades progress, figures like Egg Brother and Flying Brother—those who haven’t been alienated and possess youthful vitality—become increasingly rare. With just a single word or action, they can instantly stir the dull and lifeless pond of high school. This isn’t because they are powerful, but because the pond is too stagnant; any slight breeze or act of individuality can be labeled as the composure of a seasoned artist. But in reality, this level of mischief is nothing compared to what I saw in my junior high (rural school). Unfortunately, it was a fleeting moment; they were quickly suppressed like defiant slaves or burrowing rodents, either by whips or hammers, or assimilated.

八年前，我读高一那年，学校领导派遣了一批人远赴衡水学习。美其名曰北上取经。那批人回来之后就魔怔了，开始人为制造苦难。不仅要模仿衡水，还要超越衡水。要将过年的放假时间推迟到腊月二十八，初四就开学。这引起了我们的极大愤慨。教师们也觉得太过苛刻。我出于义愤，在腊月二十二写了一篇文章，大意是讲我们学校因为延迟放假，导致第三次世界大战的故事，用以论证延迟放假可能带来的极大危害。此文章一写完就引燃全班，靠手抄传阅的方式被2017级的学生们广为所知。如今我和当年的同学再行见面，此事依然是我赖以为傲的一个谈资。
Eight years ago, when I was a freshman, the school leadership sent a group of people to study in Hengshui. They called it a “pilgrimage to the north to learn the ways.” Upon their return, they became fanatical and started artificially creating hardships. Not only did they want to imitate Hengshui, but they also wanted to surpass it. They decided to postpone the New Year’s holiday until the 28th day of the twelfth lunar month and start school on the fourth day of the first lunar month. This provoked great outrage among us and even the teachers, who found it too harsh. Out of righteous indignation, I wrote an article on the 22nd day of the twelfth lunar month,大致 about how the delayed holiday could lead to World War III, to argue the potential dangers of the delay. As soon as the article was written, it ignited my entire class, and through handwritten copies, it became widely known among the 2017 students. Today, when I meet my classmates from back then, this remains one of my proudest talking points.

如今，蛋哥在大学毕业后成了一个捣鼓炸裂故事的短剧从业者，他确实能想出一些炸裂桥段让人瞠目结舌。飞哥和我未有联系不知所踪，但按他那远超王阳明的对知行合一的理解，应该混的不会差。我现在也是靠写点文章记录点东西赖以为生。甚至还能将高中的苦难写成文章转化成流量供己所用。我们都是河南县城高中出来的，学习也都是相当一般，但毕业以后，我们也都是靠十七八岁萌生的、未被完全扑灭的那一点个性特长来维持生活的。
Nowadays, Dan Ge has become a short drama professional who specializes in crafting explosive stories after graduating from university. He truly can come up with some explosive plot twists that leave people speechless. Fei Ge and I have lost touch and don’t know where they are, but according to his far 超王阳明 understanding of unity of knowledge and action, they should be doing quite well. I am also surviving by writing articles and documenting things. I can even turn my high school struggles into articles to generate traffic for myself. We are all from high schools in Henan county towns, and our studies were quite average, but after graduation, we all relied on that little bit of individuality and 特长 that emerged in our teens and hadn’t been completely extinguished to sustain our lives.

我给我妹妹讲了蛋哥、飞哥和我高中时的故事。我问她，你现在的高中，有没有这样的有趣人物，她说没有。我继而感叹新一代学生的落后。河南县城高中学生的累，就在于做题家太多，嘉豪太少。或者说，累就是因为，你就只是纯粹做题，没有一点嘉豪的影子。我为什么要写那篇文章，蛋哥为什么要说自己只有一个蛋，飞哥为什么要一口气奔跑到南水北调。我们自己也说不清楚，那或许只是代表着一种对压迫的反抗，反抗是调剂压抑生活的方式，有了这种方式，才不至于过于累，才不至于陷入抑郁或痛苦之中。
I told my sister about Dan Ge, Fei Ge, and my high school stories. I asked her, “Does your high school have any interesting characters like that?” She said no. I then sighed at the backwardness of the new generation of students. The exhaustion of high school students in Henan county towns lies in the fact that there are too many problem-solvers and too few Jia Hao. Or perhaps, the exhaustion is simply because you are just doing problems, without a trace of Jia Hao. Why did I write that article? Why did Dan Ge say he only had one egg? Why did Fei Ge run all the way to the South-to-North Water Diversion Project in one go? We ourselves can’t quite explain it. That may just represent a form of resistance against oppression. Resistance is a way to alleviate the monotony of life. With this kind of way, one doesn’t become too exhausted, and doesn’t fall into depression or pain.

其实说来也是造化。如果我们熬过了那样的集中营学习环境，真的能实现阶层跃迁的话，那磨掉个性老实挨训确实是尚好的选择。但可惜没有。许多人或许分数确实提高了，也确实籍此考上了大学。这样的世俗意义上的优秀的大学生比比皆是，但你问他喜欢什么，擅长什么，想成为什么，有什么远大理想。许多人就都默然不语了。这不是因为我们就胸无大志，而是家庭出身的缘故，光是完成生存之需，就已经让人疲累不已了。
In fact, it’s also fate. If we had survived that concentration camp-like learning environment and truly achieved social mobility, then being ground down and enduring scoldings would indeed be a good choice. But unfortunately, that’s not the case. Many people’s scores may have indeed improved, and they did manage to get into university through this. Such “secularly successful” university students are everywhere, but if you ask them what they like, what they are good at, what they want to become, or what their lofty ideals are, many of them fall silent. It’s not because we lack ambition, but because of our family backgrounds. Simply to meet the basic needs of survival has already left us exhausted.

当然，上述一段话的意思，并不是说提高分数和考大学不对。而是说，指望通过应试考试来实现阶层跃迁已基本无有可能，但应试还是要完成的，最起码可以保证自己不再往下滑落。不必听信老师那些考不了好的大学人生就完了那样的话。许多老师一毕业就进学校教课了，也未必就懂得现在就业的真实情况。你就是考了好的大学，也未必就一定有好的人生。反之，考的不拔尖，也未必就没有好的人生。精彩的人生是奋斗出来的，但幸福的人生不是。在漫长的人生中，还是得有自己喜欢做的事情，有所热爱的东西，幸福就是在追逐热爱中感受到的。少年时找到自己所擅长的和所热爱的，尤为重要。
Of course, the meaning of the above paragraph is not to say that improving scores and going to university is wrong. Rather, it’s to say that relying on exam-oriented education to achieve social mobility is basically impossible, but the exams still need to be taken. At the very least, it can ensure that you don’t slide further down. Don’t believe the teachers’ claims that if you don’t get into a good university, your life is over. Many teachers start teaching in schools right after graduation and may not understand the current employment situation. Even if you get into a good university, it doesn’t guarantee a good life. Conversely, even if you don’t excel in your exams, it doesn’t mean you won’t have a good life. A wonderful life is forged through struggle, but a happy life isn’t. In the long course of life, one still needs to have things they love to do, something they are passionate about. Happiness is felt in the pursuit of what you love. It is particularly important for young people to find what they are good at and what they love.

我妹妹说她本来没觉得有压力，早都已经习惯了。陡然产生焦虑是因为，前段时间她因病请假了一个晚自习，第二天早上到教室，看到桌子上堆满了数张各科卷子，这让她陡然间头大了——她明明一张都不想写，却仍然害怕会少一张。要是弄丢了，老师上课讲，自己没卷子，那更麻烦。头大的那一瞬间她感觉自己的精神被剥离了，她的精神体游离于身体之外，似乎能以第三视角看待满桌的卷子和发懵的自己。等回过来神之后，再看待日复一日的课堂和早五晚十一的作息，就哪哪都不对劲了。
My sister said she didn’t feel any pressure at first, as she had already gotten used to it. The sudden anxiety occurred because, a few weeks ago, she had to skip an evening study session due to illness. When she arrived at her classroom the next morning, she saw a stack of exam papers from various subjects piled on her desk, which made her head spin—she didn’t want to write any of them but was still afraid of missing out on some. If she lost any, it would be even more troublesome when the teacher discussed them in class without her having the papers. In that moment of head spinning, she felt her spirit being stripped away from her body; her consciousness seemed to float outside her physical form, as if she could observe the stack of papers and the bewildered version of herself from a third-person perspective. Once she came back to her senses, everything about the daily routine of classes and the early-five, late-eleven schedule felt wrong.

我理解我妹妹所说的。她是完全能够承受紧张作息所带来的生理上的累的。但当她在十七八岁时，刚刚萌发出个性自主意识与独立思考能力，就被压抑环境所压制时的那种精神痛苦，是最让人感到疲累与倦怠的。她所害怕的所谓迟到所谓扣量化分所谓没有完成作业，这些所谓天大的事，在五年后十年后回忆起来，根本什么都不是。根本就影响不了人生的什么。但这种自主意识与独立思考能力若是流失了，那之后只能沦为棋子，浑浑噩噩如提线木偶，对被设置的生活安之若素。没有可调剂生活的方式，是河南县城高中学生精神上累的主要原因。
I understand what my sister is saying. She is fully capable of enduring the physical exhaustion brought on by the intense schedule. But when she was in her late teens, just beginning to develop her sense of individual autonomy and independent thinking, and yet being suppressed by the oppressive environment, that mental suffering was the most exhausting and draining. The things she fears—being late, losing points in the evaluation system, not completing homework—these so-called major issues, when recalled five or ten years later, are completely insignificant. They have absolutely no impact on life. But if that sense of autonomy and independent thinking is lost, she will only become a pawn, drifting through life like a marionette, content with the pre-set life. The lack of ways to enrich her life is the main reason for her spiritual exhaustion as a high school student in a county in Henan.

妹妹听进去了我说的话，并表示她也应该找到自己所热爱的，用以调剂集中营生活。她说她喜欢照相，应该坚持下去。她在拼多多上，买了个几十块的相机，用以记录她的青春。因为便宜，被没收了也不心疼。我欣然应允。
My sister listened to what I said and said she should also find what she is passionate about to balance out her camp-like life. She said she loves photography and should keep going. She bought a cheap camera from Pinduoduo to document her youth. Because it was inexpensive, she wouldn’t mind if it was confiscated. I readily agreed.

上周末她给我发了两个视频，第一个视频是学生们排成一排在夜幕下往前跑。时间是晚上十点半。我知道，这是我妹妹下晚自习了。不用说，排成一排是因为学校要求，否则要么扣量化分，要么改天晚下自习半小时。她走到宿舍十点四十，就算十一点就洗漱完立马睡着，到五点半起，也只有六个多小时的时间睡觉。
Last weekend, she sent me two videos. The first video showed students running in a single line under the night sky. It was half past ten. I knew, my sister had just finished her evening study session. No need to say, they were lined up because the school required it; otherwise, they would either lose points in the evaluation system or have their evening study session extended by half an hour. She reached the dorm at ten forty, and even if she finished washing up and went to sleep immediately at eleven, she would only have six and a half hours of sleep by five thirty in the morning.

第二个视频是天擦亮，学生们往教室走去。时间是凌晨五点五十八。她要在六点前赶到教室上早自习。这你隔着手机看着就累。他们正是思维活跃和长身体的时候，却不得不千篇一律忍受生活。刘慈欣在小说《人生》中讲了这么一个故事，说是一个胎儿在腹中就获得了她母亲的全部记忆，知道了她母亲经历过的贫穷、寒冷与苦难，因而对外界极度排斥，拒绝出生，最终在分娩前自己扯断了脐带。换位思考一下，如果我的孩子以后也要经历成长的物质贫乏，与求学的集中营规训这种痛苦的话，那还是不要孩子为好了。
The second video shows it’s dawn, and the students are walking towards the classroom. The time is 5:58 AM. She needs to get to the classroom before 6:00 AM for early self-study. Just watching them through the phone makes you tired. They are at the age when their minds are active and their bodies are growing, yet they have to endure life in the same monotonous way. In the novel “Life” by Liu Cixin, there’s a story about a fetus who acquires the entire memory of its mother in the womb, learning about her experiences of poverty, cold, and hardship. As a result, it becomes extremely reluctant to interact with the outside world and refuses to be born, ultimately cutting its own umbilical cord before delivery. If you put yourself in their shoes, if your child is going to experience material poverty and the harsh discipline of a study camp in the future, then it might be better not to have a child at all.

当然，教育资源物质资源的不平衡，让山河四省的许多高中不得不如此设置。关键是许多家长也听了一些所谓的心灵鸡汤，就也跟着说什么，孩子，我宁愿欠你一个快乐的少年，也不愿意看到你卑微的成年。这话纯属自我感动式的放屁。从那种高中过来的人都知道，实际上是一个地狱的少年加卑微的成年。谁告诉你少年不快乐，成年就不卑微了？
Of course, the imbalance of educational and material resources forces many high schools in the four provinces of Shanhaiguan to operate this way. The key is that many parents have also heard some so-called motivational quotes and follow suit, saying, “Child, I’d rather owe you a happy youth than see you live a humble adulthood.” This is nothing but self-indulgent nonsense. Anyone who has graduated from such a high school knows that it’s actually like living through a hellish youth followed by a humble adulthood. Who told you that a youth cannot be happy or that adulthood cannot be humble?

我是在大学毕业找了好几份工作以后才明白，卑微的与否，很大程度上根本就不取决于成绩的好坏，而在于自己是否有可持续发展的真心热爱的爱好。人在做自己真心喜欢的事情时是乐此不疲的，也自然是最自信的。从这个角度说，我理解河南县城高中学生的累，我也支持如我妹妹一样的高中学生，不必对被设置的生活安之若素。找到自己调剂生活的方式，就是一种敢于反抗压迫的勇气。这种勇气，不管到什么时候都是弥足珍贵的。

I only realized after graduating and trying out several jobs that whether one is humble or not largely depends not on academic performance but on whether one has sustainable, heartfelt passions. When people do things they truly love, they are tireless and naturally most confident. From this perspective, I understand the exhaustion of high school students in rural Henan and I support high school students like my sister who don’t have to accept the life imposed on them. Finding ways to balance life is a form of courage to resist oppression. This kind of courage is always invaluable, no matter when.

普通人选妻子的40个智慧 2026-01-11 阅读需要4分钟 1.喜欢戴帽子的女人，慎娶。
Top 40 Wisdoms for Choosing a Wife 2026-01-11 Reading time: 4 minutes 1. If a woman likes to wear hats, be cautious.

2.不要选太聪明的，聪明女人往往很强势。
2. Don’t choose someone who is too smart; smart women are often domineering.

3.找老婆，一定要找性格好的，情绪稳定的，不要找泼辣野蛮的，婚后就懂了，一地鸡毛。
3. When looking for a wife, you must find one with a good personality and stable emotions. Don’t choose a fiery or savage one. You’ll understand it after marriage, with everything in chaos.

4.别看外表，漂亮的脸蛋总有一天会老去，但有趣的灵魂却历久弥新。
4. Don’t judge by appearance; beautiful faces will eventually age, but an interesting soul remains timeless.

5.控制欲过强，希望完全控制你的，不能要！
5. If someone has too strong a desire to completely control you, don’t go for them!

6.找老婆最重要的三点：人品好、独立、爱她。
6. The three most important things when looking for a wife: good character, independence, and loving her.

7.找伴侣一定要先看对方的父母，父母三观正，孩子就不会太差。
7. When looking for a partner, you must first consider the parents of the other person. If the parents have a positive outlook on life, the child won’t be too bad.

8.找个有独立思考能力的女孩，盲从的伴侣可能会让你在关键时刻失去方向。
8. Find a girl who has the ability to think independently. A partner who blindly follows others might make you lose your direction at critical moments.

9.她一定要爱干净，最起码的下雨知道收衣服，地脏了会扫要做到。
9. She must be clean and tidy. At the very least, she knows to put away clothes when it rains and will sweep the floor when it’s dirty.

10.温柔的。好的母亲，成就了男人的上半生，好的妻子，决定了男人的后半生。妻子温柔贤惠，会给男人莫大的宽慰；妻子妥帖顾家，会让男人减轻忧虑。
10. Gentle. A good mother accomplishes a man’s first half of life, and a good wife determines his second half. A gentle and virtuous wife brings great comfort to a man; a wife who manages the household well alleviates his worries.

11.找老婆，要找嘴大的，切莫找小嘴的。
11. When looking for a wife, seek one with a big mouth, avoid those with small mouths.

12.找一个愿意和你一起成长的女孩，彼此成就、共同进步，这样的关系才能长久。
12. Find a girl who is willing to grow with you, where both parties achieve and progress together—such a relationship can last.

13.门牙之间有一条缝的女人就算了，那样只会不利于夫妻感情。
13. Women with a gap between their front teeth should be avoided, as it is 不利 to marital harmony.

14.娶老婆，尽量不找性格强势的。
14. When marrying, try not to choose a woman with a strong personality.

15.注意她的沟通方式，良好的沟通是关系的润滑剂，不会沟通，感情迟早出问题。
15. Pay attention to her communication style. Good communication is the lubricant of a relationship; without it, emotions will eventually run into problems.

16.不找一个太多于物质的女孩，要选一个会过日子的老婆，而且愿意跟你过日子。
16. Don’t choose a girl who is overly materialistic. Select a wife who knows how to manage daily life and is willing to live with you.

17.找个契约精神强的。年纪轻的可能理解不了，以后你们就慢慢懂了。
17. Find someone with a strong sense of contract. Younger people might not understand this, but you will as time goes on.

18.情绪稳定是第一位的，不管对方是什么家世学历，不符合这个条件，一律避开。
18. Emotional stability is the top priority, regardless of the other person’s family background or education. If they don’t meet this condition, avoid them entirely.

19.身体要健康，精神要正常。
19. Stay physically healthy and mentally sound.

20.选“安分”的女人。一个贤妻，她必定是安分的、少欲少求的、清心寡欲的。
20. Choose a “docile” woman. A virtuous wife will undoubtedly be docile, with few desires and modest needs, and will lead a simple life.

21.没钱就不要玩高配，这是武 大郎告诉你的教训，毕竟没有相对应的能力，根本就把持不住太漂亮的女人。
21. If you don’t have money, don’t play with high-end setups. This is the lesson Wu Daliang taught you. After all, without the corresponding ability, you simply can’t handle a woman who is too beautiful.

22.买房看梁，娶妻看娘，选老婆，你就先选丈娘，有个好丈母娘，你就有个好老婆。
22. When buying a house, look at the beams; when marrying a wife, look at her mother. When choosing a wife, first choose her mother-in-law. Having a good mother-in-law means you’ll have a good wife.

23.择偶别只看外表、家境，这些易伪装，“娶妻娶贤”才是硬道理。
23. When choosing a partner, don’t just look at appearance or family background—these can be easily faked. “Marriage should be based on virtue” is the true principle.

24.不找做过夜 场的女人，事故多也故事多，根本就把控不住。
24. Don’t date women who have worked in nightclubs. They have too many accidents and stories, and you simply can’t control them.

25.不找喜欢八卦，爱嚼舌头的女人。
25. Don’t choose women who love gossip or talking behind people’s backs.

26.对前任执念很深的女人，能不追就不追。
26. Women who hold onto their exes very strongly, avoid pursuing them if possible.

27.娶妻别娶“扶 弟 魔”，尽管你选择的老婆，在各方面都很优秀。
27. Don’t marry a “supporting brother demon.” Even if the wife you choose is excellent in every aspect.

28.异地恋就算了，不仅辛苦而且很费钱，更是对彼此的一大考验。
28. Give up on long-distance relationships. They are not only exhausting but also costly, and they put a great test on both parties.

29.饭圈女孩要不得。
29. Girl fans in the fan club are undesirable.

30.动不动就 飙 脏 话的女人不 能 娶，以后孩子也会复制她的行为，一 代 坏 媳 妇，三 代 坏 儿 孙。
30. Women who frequently use foul language cannot be married, as their children will also copy her behavior, resulting in a bad wife in one generation and bad 子孙 in three generations.

31.娶妻娶贤。贤惠是首当其冲的必要条件。
31. Marry a wife who is virtuous. Virtue is the most important necessary condition.

32.情绪稳定、清醒坚韧的伴侣，比表面温柔更珍贵。
32. A partner who is emotionally stable, clear-headed, and resilient is more precious than one who appears gentle on the surface.

33.找伴侣要门当户对，门当户对三观能相近，生活方式可以同频。
33. When looking for a partner, it’s important to find someone with a compatible background. A compatible background often means similar values and lifestyles that can resonate with each other.

34.老是往娘家“扒拉钱”的老婆，还是不要娶得好。
34. A wife who always asks for money from her parents is not a good choice to marry.

35.不要找有男闺蜜的女孩子，男人都懂男人！
35. Don’t date girls who have male best friends; men understand men!

36.三观、道德、责任这些基本为人的素质一定要在线，这个是确保婚姻长远，爱到最后，全靠良心。
36. Basic qualities of being a person, such as values, morality, and responsibility, must be present. This is crucial for a long-lasting marriage, where love ultimately depends on conscience.

37.无法适应变化，过于守旧的，不能要！
37. Cannot adapt to changes and is overly traditional—do not marry!

38.万万不可因为世俗压力，随便找一个人结婚。
38. Never marry someone at random just because of social pressure.

39.重点考察三点：女方认知格局、情绪稳定性，以及其原生家庭相处模式。
39. Focus on three key aspects: the woman’s cognitive framework, emotional stability, and her interaction patterns with her family of origin.

40.父母反对的女人就算了，他们不会害自己子女，就怕你没看透。
40. Just give up on women who are opposed by their parents; they won’t harm their own children, but the danger is that you might not see through it.

人生 2026-01-13 阅读需要10分钟 2001年寒冬，我出生在河南郑州一个偏僻的小村庄，爸爸学历高中，在我出生那一年在镇上当邮递员，妈妈无业，在家全职照顾我和姐姐，爷爷奶奶全是农民，好在爷爷年轻时跟着村子里的老师傅学了点木工手艺，偶尔可以做点木制品家具去镇上卖，加上爸爸的工资，一家人的收入也能维持温饱。姐姐比我大6个月，在她刚出生第3个月，她爸妈就因为一场车祸去世，留下了仅仅3个月她和她双腿有点残疾的奶奶。她妈妈和我妈妈是小学同学，我妈看她可怜，就把她抱来家里抚养。
Life 2026-01-13 Reading time: 10 minutes In the winter of 2001, I was born in a remote village in Zhengzhou, Henan. My father had a high school education and worked as a postman in the town when I was born. My mother was unemployed and took care of me and my sister at home. Both my grandparents were farmers. Fortunately, my grandfather learned some woodworking skills from a master in the village when he was young and occasionally made wooden furniture to sell in the town. With my father’s salary, the family’s income was just enough to get by. My sister is six months older than me. When she was three months old, her parents died in a car accident, leaving her and her slightly disabled grandmother behind. My mother and her mother were classmates in elementary school. My mother felt sorry for her and took her in to raise her.

2岁，爸爸辞去了邮递员的工作，带着妈妈一起经同村人介绍相约去宁波打工，那时候的我还没有记忆，在我幼小的脑海里，连爸妈长什么样都不知道。只知道他们一走就是一年，每逢过年才回来，一年往家里寄两次钱，那是零几年，那时候寄钱还是用邮政信封里装着现金。
At 2 years old, Dad quit his job as a mail carrier and took Mom to Ningbo to work, introduced by someone from the same village. I had no memories then, and in my young mind, I didn’t even know what my parents looked like. I only knew they left for a year and came back only during Chinese New Year. They sent money home twice a year. That was around the early 2000s, when sending money still involved cash in postal envelopes.

5岁，我和姐姐读了幼儿园，那种村里的幼儿园，只需要读一年，幼儿园在隔壁村，每天我和姐姐要走很久麦田小路才能到学校，教室只是一间下雨漏水的小屋子，教室后面有个小土坡，大概2米高，对于那时的我们来说，那条有滑梯痕迹的土坡是我们课间唯一的乐趣。
At 5 years old, my sister and I attended a village kindergarten. It was the kind of kindergarten that only lasted for one year. The school was in the neighboring village, and every day, my sister and I had to walk a long path through the wheat fields to get there. The classroom was just a small, leaky hut that let in rainwater. Behind the classroom was a small earthen slope, about 2 meters high. For us back then, that slope with its slide marks was our only source of fun during breaks.

9岁，爷爷生了一场很重的病，花光了家里所有积蓄，在市里医院住了很久，爸妈从宁波赶回来每天轮流看护，直到很晚才坐乡镇公交回家，我和姐姐每晚都拿着手电筒去村后面公路等着，等爸妈回来我们才能睡着。由于所有的钱都给爷爷治病，我们那一年，甚至一件新衣服都没有，一双鞋子穿好几个月，偶尔有村里大孩子家淘汰的衣服鞋子，会有邻居送到我们家给我和姐姐穿。
At 9 years old, Grandpa got a very serious illness and used up all the family’s savings. He stayed in the city hospital for a long time. My parents rushed back from Ningbo to take turns taking care of him, only returning home very late on rural buses. Every night, my sister and I would hold flashlights and wait by the road behind the village, waiting for our parents to come home so we could finally sleep. Since all the money was spent on Grandpa’s treatment, that year, we didn’t even have a new piece of clothing, and our shoes lasted for several months. Occasionally, neighbors would give us secondhand clothes and shoes that were discarded by older children in the village.

10岁，爷爷的病日渐康复。爸妈和几个同乡在宁波合伙开了一家电器加工厂。说是加工厂，其实也就是几十平米的破雨棚和几台不知道转过几手的机器，那是爸妈梦开始的地方。靠着每天凌晨喝到吐的身体，一步步摸爬滚打把工厂扩大。
At 10 years old, Grandpa’s condition gradually improved. My parents and a few fellow villagers started an electrical processing factory in Ningbo. It was called a factory, but in reality, it was just a broken rain shelter measuring about 30 square meters and a few machines that had been passed around by unknown hands. That was where my parents’ dream began. Relying on their bodies, which were often so weak they would vomit after drinking water at dawn, they struggled step by step to expand the factory.

12岁，爸妈的生意已经初具规模了，在宁波买了房子，在我们小学还没毕业，爸妈就计划把我和姐姐送去上海读初中。
12 years old, my parents’ business had already grown substantially, and they bought a house in Ningbo. Before we even graduated from elementary school, my parents planned to send me and my sister to Shanghai to attend middle school.

同年，妈妈查出了癌症晚期，和爸爸在宁波没日没夜的打拼这几年，妈妈的身体已经千疮百孔了。小学毕业那个暑假，我和姐姐赶到宁波妈妈的医院，妈妈躺在ICU里面，眼睛全是血丝，头发全掉光了，我那个时候就在想，眼前的人不是妈妈，妈妈有着一头乌黑亮丽的长发和一双大眼睛，但是此刻躺在我面前的，就是一副需要氧气机硬撑着的一副骨瘦如柴的身躯。过世的时候体重只有六十多斤，我和姐姐嚎啕大哭，这是妈妈生病以来我们见的第一面，也是最后一面，原来妈妈之前电话里的欢声笑语都是硬撑着表现出来的。第二天，妈妈离开了我们，闭眼之前，她用全身最后一点力气，对我们硬生生挤出了一个微笑。
That same year, my mother was diagnosed with late-stage cancer. After years of non-stop struggling in Ningbo with my father, my mother’s body had completely deteriorated. During the summer break after elementary school graduation, my sister and I rushed to Ningbo to visit my mother in the hospital. My mother was lying in the ICU, her eyes full of blood vessels, completely bald, and her body was emaciated, barely able to be sustained by an oxygen machine. Her weight at the time of her death was only over 60 jin. My sister and I cried uncontrollably; it was the first time we had seen her since she got sick, and it would be the last. We realized that the cheerful sounds and laughter we heard over the phone from her were just her trying to hold on. Before she closed her eyes, she used her last bit of strength to force a smile.

13岁，妈妈去世的第二年，爸爸把我和姐姐送去了上海读私立，爸爸再婚，和后妈生了一个小女儿，从那以后爸爸把他所有的爱给了他的小女儿，我和姐姐从小作为留守儿童，受尽苦难，妹妹刚出生就上海户口，锦衣玉食，这让姐姐产生了不平衡的心理，哪怕到12年后的今天也一样不跟我妹妹说一句话，两个人就像是仇人。其实她不知道的是，她自己甚至跟我们家一点血缘关系都没有。
13 years old, the second year after my mother’s death, my father sent my sister and me to Shanghai to attend a private school. My father remarried and had a little daughter with his new wife. From then on, my father devoted all his love to his little daughter. My sister and I grew up as left-behind children, enduring all kinds of hardships. Our younger sister was born with a Shanghai hukou and lived a life of luxury, which made my sister develop an imbalance in her mentality. Even today, 12 years later, she still refuses to say a word to our younger sister, as if they were enemies. In reality, she didn’t even have any blood ties to our family.

17岁，家里的产业越来越好，爸爸后妈决定把我和姐姐送出国，经过一番商量，姐姐去新加坡，而我去美国。其实对于那个时候的我们来说，去哪里读书无所谓，只要能离家远就清净。或许在妈妈去世的那一刻，我们已经不属于这个家了。
17 years old, our family’s business was getting better and better. My father’s new wife decided to send my sister and me abroad. After some discussion, my sister went to Singapore, while I went to the United States. At that time, for us, where we studied didn’t matter as long as we could be far away from home. Perhaps from the moment my mother passed away, we no longer belonged to that family.

18岁，临去美国前一天，爸爸和后妈把我送去机场，一句话没说，一句叮嘱没有。或许在他们眼里，只有他们的小女儿才是自己的孩子，说的也没错，我和姐姐是留守儿童，而妹妹才是在眼下一天一天长大的。那时的我，一个人拎着两个大箱子去美国，面对陌生的环境，陌生的种族，心理只有害怕，害怕自己无法融入环境，害怕自己交不到朋友。
Eighteen years old, the day before leaving for the United States, Dad and my stepmother took me to the airport without a word, no words of advice. Perhaps in their eyes, only their little daughter was their own child, and they weren’t wrong. My sister and I were left-behind children, while the younger sister was the one growing up right before their eyes day by day. At that time, I went to the United States alone with two large suitcases. Facing a strange environment, a strange race, my mind was only filled with fear, afraid that I couldn’t integrate into the environment, afraid that I couldn’t make friends.

19岁，2020年春节，是我第一次一个人在外面过年。那天费城下了很大的雨，冬令时的美国东部下午睡醒已经天黑了，给爸妈打了电话，没有接，只有20分钟之后后妈一句冰冷冷的记得吃饺子。刷了一会攻略，只有离我20分钟车程的中国城附近的中餐厅还有饺子。天很冷，我顶着大风，坐上了公交车，到了餐厅拿了外卖火速赶回去，回去的路上后座坐着一位黑人大哥，笑嘻嘻的盯着我，我很害怕，一路都在心惊胆战，下了车一路小跑到公寓，伞都忘了拿，回家之后全身都湿透了，饺子也冷了，咬一口，是我最不爱吃的荠菜馅的，很委屈、很委屈，眼泪瞬间掉下来了，一瞬间的心酸委屈涌上心头，就这样我没开灯一边哭一边吃凉透了的饺子。这一幕，我记了很久很久，或许我这辈子都不会忘。
Nineteen years old, during the 2020 Spring Festival, it was the first time I spent the holiday alone outside. That day, Philadelphia had heavy rain, and by the afternoon in the U.S. Eastern Standard Time, it had already become dark. I called my parents, but there was no answer, only my stepmother’s cold reminder after 20 minutes, “Remember to eat dumplings.” I browsed some travel guides and found that the Chinese restaurant near the Chinatown, about a 20-minute drive from me, still served dumplings. It was very cold, and I braved the wind, got on the bus, went to the restaurant, picked up takeout, and rushed back. On the way back, a Black man sat in the back seat, smiling and staring at me. I was very scared and kept on edge the whole way. When I got off the bus, I ran all the way to my apartment, forgetting my umbrella. When I got home, I was completely drenched, and the dumplings were cold. I took a bite, and it was the kind of filling I disliked the most, chrysanthemum leaves. I felt so wronged, so wronged, tears instantly fell, and a wave of heartache and wrongfulness surged through my heart. That night, I didn’t turn on the light, crying while eating the cold dumplings. This scene, I remember for a very, very long time, perhaps I will never forget it in my entire life.

22岁，临近本科毕业我想回国，我爸不让，说让我继续去加拿大读硕士，但是我那时就是一心想回国，我们大吵了一架，我爸威胁我不继续读就断我的生活费，最终我妥协了。
Twenty-two years old, close to graduating from my undergraduate studies, I wanted to return to China. My dad wouldn’t let me, saying I should continue to Canada for my master’s degree. But at that time, I was determined to return to China, and we had a big fight. My dad threatened to cut off my allowance if I didn’t continue my studies, and in the end, I gave in.

23岁，温哥华很冷，天气阴晴不定，上一秒天晴，下一秒可能就暴雨。阴天占多数，每天灰蒙蒙的。从到了温哥华之后我就把自己封闭起来，因为我的心思一直放在回国上，我不明白我爸为什么不让我回国，爸爸和后妈也开始出现感情问题，家里一团乱麻。后妈经常深夜给我打电话说他们又喝酒吵架又打架，这一年家里的一切都乱糟糟。而我在国外，什么都做不了，他们似乎什么时候都瞒着我们，从这个时候开始，我患上了抑郁，我不知道自己怎么了，逐渐暴躁，会因为一块切不开的排骨而被气哭，电子产品也被我摔了一批又一批，就这样，我度过了我人生中最黑暗的半年。
Twenty-three years old, Vancouver was very cold, with unpredictable weather, sometimes sunny, sometimes 暴雨. Most of the time, it was overcast. After arriving in Vancouver, I shut myself down because I was always focused on returning to China. I didn’t understand why my dad wouldn’t let me go back. My dad and stepmother also started having relationship problems, and the house was in chaos. My stepmother often called me late at night saying they had another drinking argument or even a fight. That year, everything at home was chaotic. While I was abroad, I couldn’t do anything. It seemed like they hid everything from us. From this point on, I developed depression. I didn’t know what was wrong with me, and I gradually became irritable. I would cry over a piece of pork that couldn’t be cut, and I broke a batch of electronic devices after another. That way, I went through the darkest half-year of my life.

半年后，隔壁搬来了一个新邻居，她养了一条萨摩耶。但是她很懒，不怎么遛狗，还喜欢出去旅游。后来她家里有事要回国很久，本身我也不排斥宠物，所以我就主动把照顾狗狗的担子接了过来。大型犬，精力旺盛，每天要出去溜。于是我就经常带它去湖边，去草坪玩，学着给它做狗饭，学着照顾小狗，久而久之，因为小狗的存在，我根本就没有时间胡思乱想，每天都忙着照顾它，于是我做梦都没想到，是一条狗把我从抑郁的深渊里拉了出来。 当我有能力为自己抹去眼泪的时候，它已然干涸，而那道泪痕是如何洇在那里的，我也记不清了。
Six months later, a new neighbor moved in next door, and she had a Samoyed. But she was very lazy and didn’t take the dog for walks often, nor did she like traveling. Later, she had family matters and had to return to her home country for a long time. Since I wasn’t averse to pets, I took the initiative to take on the responsibility of caring for the dog. Large dogs, full of energy, need to be taken out every day. So, I often took it to the lakeside and the lawn to play, learned to make dog food for it, and learned to take care of it. Over time, because of the dog’s presence, I didn’t have any time to overthink things; I was always busy taking care of it. And so, I never dreamed that it was a dog that pulled me out of the depths of depression. By the time I had the strength to wipe away my tears, it was already dry. And how the tear stain had blurred there, I couldn’t remember anymore.

同年11月底，疼爱我们一生的奶奶也突发脑溢血去世，爸爸后妈瞒着我不告诉我，导致我白白浪费一次机票改签的机会。奶奶去世那天，离我原本计划回国只相差十几天，奶奶直到生命的尽头还在担心不要耽误我学习。通过微信视频看着奶奶把眼睛闭上，那是温哥华凌晨三点，隔着一万多公里的太平洋，16小时时差，中国离我好远好远，远到像是另一个世界。
At the end of November of the same year, our beloved grandmother, who had loved us all our lives, suddenly died of a cerebral hemorrhage. My father and stepmother hid it from me, which led to me wasting a flight rescheduling opportunity. The day Grandma passed away, it was only about ten days before my original plan to return to the country. Until the very end of her life, Grandma was still worried about not delaying my studies. Watching Grandma close her eyes through a WeChat video call, it was 3 a.m. in Vancouver. Across more than 10,000 kilometers of the Pacific Ocean, with a 16-hour time difference, China seemed so far away, like another world.

24岁，硕士毕业回国，这几年爸妈生意越做越大，各自有各自的事业，导致大家都很忙，几乎没什么沟通，经常吵架甚至动手，爸爸经常出轨，后妈逐渐也视而不见了，导致最后离婚，到现在的为了分割财产打官司，后妈又组建了新的家庭，全部都乱糟糟的。在后妈心中，只要把该分的钱给她，她就无所谓，妹妹不愿意去后妈香港的新家庭，所以还是经常留在我们这边，直到现在家里还是一团乱糟。
At 24, I returned to the country after finishing my master’s degree. In these years, my parents’ businesses had grown even bigger, each with their own careers, which led to everyone being very busy and almost no communication. They often argued, even resorted to violence, and my father often cheated on my stepmother, who gradually started to turn a blind eye. This eventually led to a divorce, and now they are fighting in court over property division. My stepmother has since started a new family, and everything is still in chaos. In my stepmother’s eyes, as long as she gets her share of the money, it doesn’t matter. My younger sister doesn’t want to go to my stepmother’s new family in Hong Kong, so she still often stays with us, and the house is still in disarray.

中式家庭教育，孩子是最无足轻重的。父母对我们的期望就只有学习学习，因为学习，在妈妈生命的最后时刻我们只见一面，因为学习，奶奶在闭上眼的最后一刻还在期盼着我和姐姐回国拉着她的手，告诉她我们舍不得她走。
In Chinese family education, children are considered the least important. Parents’ expectations for us are only about studying and studying. Because of studying, we only saw each other once in the last moments of Mom’s life. Because of studying, Grandma was still hoping that my sister and I would return and hold her hand, telling her that we didn’t want her to leave, at the very last moment before she closed her eyes.

05年信封里的纸钞，直到25年才兑现，妈妈奶奶，我很想你们，不过我们经常在梦里重逢，总有一天我们会再见。姐姐在新加坡拿了身份定居不愿回国，一副跟家里老死不相往来的态度。你们离开之后，我们一直在被爸爸后妈掌控，我们过不了自己想要的生活，最起码现在过不了，如果你们知道，肯定也会心疼我们吧，如今爷爷老年痴呆越来越严重，这个世界上还真心为我们好的人已经快不记得我们了。
The banknotes in the envelope from 2005 were only redeemed 25 years later. Mom, Grandma, I miss you very much, but we often reunite in our dreams. One day, we will meet again. My sister got a status in Singapore and settled there, unwilling to return to our country. She has a attitude of complete indifference towards the family. After you left, we have been controlled by our father and stepmother. We can’t live the life we want. At least not now. If you knew, you would definitely feel sorry for us. Now, Grandpa’s dementia is getting worse and worse. The people in this world who are truly good to us are almost forgotten.

生活在这种家庭环境下，我没有扭曲的三观，没有堕落，更没有自暴自弃，这已然是一种幸事，幸福我会忘掉，可痛苦时至今日，仍然记忆犹新，我总是想不起来写下幸福的瞬间，所以我选择不断的用文字记录着那些名为痛苦的记忆。

Living in this family environment, I haven’t twisted my values, nor have I sunk into decadence or given up on myself. This is already a blessing. I will forget happiness, but the pain, even until today, remains fresh in my memory. I can’t remember the moments of happiness, so I choose to continuously record those memories named pain.

废物测试 2026-01-08 阅读需要5分钟 揭密一个很脏很恶心的恋爱套路，这个东西但凡长得漂亮点的女孩儿都会用，我们圈内叫做废物测试。
Waste Test 2026-01-08 Reading takes 5 minutes. Revealing a very dirty and disgusting love scam. This thing, any girl who looks good would use it. We call it the waste test in our circle.

基本上百分之99的男人会中招，除非你是那个内核强大的阿尔法男，中招过后的结果，就和他的名字一样，把你测试成一个废物，彻底变成一条舔狗。
Basically, 99% of men will fall for it, unless you are that alpha male with a strong core. The result after falling for it is just like its name, it tests you as a waste, completely turning you into a puppy dog.

你可以把这条视频当做一条脱单工具来用，它甚至可以吊打市面上绝大多数情感博主的私教课内容。
You can use this video as a tool to help you get into a relationship, and it can even outperform the private lessons content of most relationship coaches in the market.

只要你耐心看完，面对你喜欢的女生。
As long as you watch it patiently, when facing the girl you like.

ok废话不多说上干货。我想先问你们，在跟女生的相处中，有没有被问到这样的问题：你是不是喜欢我，你有没有想我。如果是你，你该怎么回答，你是不是说：是呀，我就是喜欢你呀，我想你了。
Alright, let’s cut to the chase. I want to ask you all, in your interactions with girls, have you ever been asked questions like: Do you like me? Have you been thinking about me? If you have, how would you answer? Would you say: Yes, I do like you, I’ve been thinking about you.

兄弟，如果你真的这么回答，从这一刻起，你就已经gameover了，为什么我会这么说，今儿我就把废物测试的底层逻辑拆开了，揉碎了跟你讲。所有女生天生就会识别内在强大的男人，而且都是她们的无意识举动，是几百万年的幕强属性进化而来的结果，是为了让她们筛选出优秀的基因而达到繁衍价值的利益最大化，她们会通过这套系统来识别出基因强大的男人，淘汰掉表里不一的男人。
Bro, if you really answer like that, from this moment on, you’ve already lost. Why do I say that? Today, I’m going to break down the underlying logic of the waste test and explain it to you in detail. All girls are naturally able to recognize men with inner strength, and this is all done subconsciously, the result of millions of years of evolution of the alpha male trait, designed to maximize the benefit of selecting superior genes for reproduction. They use this system to identify men with strong genes and eliminate those who are two-faced.

她们为什么要这么做，是因为绝大多数男人在演化过程中，进化出了一项女生没有的能力，叫做吹牛逼，吹牛逼的目的，当然也是为了吸引女生的注意，为了繁衍。
Why do they do this? It’s because the vast majority of men have evolved a skill that most women don’t possess during evolution, called “blowing smoke.” The purpose of blowing smoke, of course, is also to attract women’s attention and for reproduction.

你有没有发现，你身边的兄弟，没有一个是不会吹牛逼的。哪怕是你身边单身了几十年的舔狗兄弟，跟你同时在一个有漂亮女生的社交局中，也会下意识的端着，就这群舔狗只要看到有漂亮的女生，就开始装逼了，就开始不真实了，甚至开始对你颐指气使，会各种打压你来凸显他在女人面前的优越感，这就是他们的本性。漂亮女生当然不吃这一套，所以她们也进化出了废物测试这项本能来测试你的内核是否跟你吹出来的牛逼一样强大。
Have you noticed that none of the brothers around you are immune to blowing smoke. Even the devoted dog brothers who have been single for decades, when they’re in the same social gathering with attractive women as you, will subconsciously put on an act. Just these devoted dogs will start showing off the moment they see beautiful women, start to become unreal, and even start giving you orders, variously putting you down to highlight their superiority in front of women. This is their nature. Beautiful women, of course, don’t fall for this, so they have also evolved a 本能 called “waste test” to test whether your core is as strong as the smoke you blow.

也就是说，如果你的内核不够稳，那么大概率你会死在这一关。
That is to say, if your core is not stable, then there’s a high probability you will die at this stage.

那么什么是内核，内核就是你对待这个世界、对待女人的态度，用在男女关系中就是你在女人面前会不会受到女人的影响，比如你想要干一番事业，那就必然没有多的时间陪女朋友，而如果你女朋友说，我不想要你出去工作，我就想要你在家里陪我，如果你听了她的话照做了，那我告诉你要不了多久她就会离开你，我举这个例子你就应该秒懂内核是什么东西了吧。女人废物测试的目的就是为了击碎你的内核让你服从她的指令，不管是你的三观也好，你的生活习惯也罢，你的一切都向她妥协，比如她喜欢吃什么，你就要跟着她吃什么，她想要买什么你就会砸锅卖铁给她买什么，从此你就会彻底驯化成了一个废物，抛弃自己的事业完全围着她转。而人的大脑有一个致命的bug,就是人大概率不会喜欢已经得到的东西，也就是说，当你什么都将就她了，她反而不喜欢你了。
So what is the core? The core is your attitude towards the world and towards women. In terms of gender relationships, it refers to whether you are influenced by women in front of them. For example, if you want to achieve something in your career, then you obviously don’t have much time to spend with your girlfriend. And if your girlfriend says, “I don’t want you to go out to work, I just want you to stay home with me,” and if you listen to her and do as she says, then I tell you that soon she will leave you. I give you this example, and you should instantly understand what the core is. The purpose of the woman’s waste test is to shatter your core and make you obey her commands, whether it’s your values or your lifestyle habits, everything you do will be compromised for her. For example, if she likes to eat something, you have to follow her and eat it. If she wants to buy something, you will sell your house to buy it for her. From then on, you will be completely tamed into a waste, abandoning your career and completely revolving around her. And there’s a fatal bug in the human brain, which is that people are unlikely to like what they have already obtained. That is to say, when you compromise on everything for her, she will no longer like you.

这就是为什么百分之九十九的舔狗都不会有什么好下场的原因。所以咱们回到刚刚那句话，女人问你是不是喜欢我，你之所以会说我喜欢你，我就是想你，就是你的本能想证明自己，想证明给她看，而当你想证明自己的时候，你跟她的关系自然而然落入低位，你可以想想，因为只有低位者才会向高位者证明自己的忠诚，我再给你打个比方，当你去一家公司应聘的时候，hr上来就会让你介绍一下自己，然后再问你为什么想加入我们公司，这是公司招人惯用的服从性测试，目的就是筛选出听话而且能力又强的牛马。
This is why 99% of puppy dogs never have a good outcome. So let’s go back to that earlier statement. When a woman asks if you like her, the reason you say you like her is because I want you, it’s your instinct to prove yourself, to prove to her. And when you want to prove yourself, your relationship with her naturally falls into a low position. You can think about it, because only those in a low position prove their loyalty to those in a high position. Let me give you another example. When you go for a job interview at a company, the HR will immediately ask you to introduce yourself, and then ask why you want to join our company. This is a common obedience test used by companies to screen out obedient and capable “beasts of burden.”

ok,那么说了这么多，而女人这句话我们到底该怎么回？
Alright, so after all that said, how should we respond to a woman’s statement like that?

听好了，我只讲一遍，你可以把问题反抛给她，那你是不是喜欢我呢？你是不是想我了呢？
Listen carefully, I’ll only say this once. You can turn the question back on her: Do you like me? Do you miss me?

或者说，你能问出这句话，是不是代表着你已经喜欢上我了，如果是别人，你也会问出这句话吗？也就是说，破解废物测试的万能公式就是保持内核稳定不被击碎，或者直接无视她。当然了，如果你是一个阿尔法男，这些问题不需要动脑子都会迎刃而解。
Or, if you can ask this question, does it mean you already like me? Would you ask this question to someone else? In other words, the universal formula to break the “废物测试” (waste test) is to maintain inner stability and not be shattered, or simply ignore her. Of course, if you’re an alpha male, these problems will be solved effortlessly without needing to think.

ok,如果你觉得我今天讲的东西有用，关注我，带你慢慢变强。

Alright, if you find what I’m talking about today useful, follow me, and I’ll guide you in gradually getting stronger.

从马哲看女性，女性的最大困局是肉体被异化为多元利益 2026-01-13 阅读需要16分钟 女性文明当前面临的最大困局，是部分女性的肉体被异化为多元利益的交换筹码。而对应的另一面，是男性尚未从灵魂深处真正懂得尊重女性的和谐地位。
From Marxist philosophy to women, the greatest predicament of women is their bodies being alienated into multiple interests 2026-01-13 Reading takes 16 minutes The greatest predicament facing women’s civilization currently is that the bodies of some women are alienated into exchange chips for multiple interests. On the corresponding other side, men have not yet truly understood from the depths of their souls the harmonious status of women.

说起来，我观察中国社会二十余年，提笔撰文也有千篇之多，却从未公开触碰过中国女性这个议题 —— 一来是顾忌话题的敏感性，二来，也是怀着对文明社会稳步前行的理想主义期许。
Speaking of it, I have observed Chinese society for over twenty years and have written thousands of articles, yet I have never publicly touched upon the topic of Chinese women — partly out of consideration for the sensitivity of the topic, and partly out of a utopian hope for the steady progress of a civilized society.

近些年，女性话题渐渐多了起来，不再像从前那般讳莫如深。可这热闹的讨论，未必就意味着社会文明的进阶。恰恰相反，两性间的张力，反倒以更尖锐的姿态暴露在公众视野里。不少人动辄惊呼 “女权主义抬头”，就连亿万富翁俞某某，也喊出了 “女人堕落导致国家堕落” 的惊人之语，被一些人当成了对当下社会态势的精准概括。
In recent years, topics about women have gradually increased and are no longer as taboo as before. But this lively discussion does not necessarily mean the advancement of social civilization. On the contrary, the tension between the two genders has instead been exposed to the public eye in a more acute manner. Many people are quick to exclaim “feminism is on the rise,” and even billionaire Yu Mou Mou, shouted the astonishing statement “women’s decline leads to the decline of the nation,” which some people took as an accurate summary of the current social situation.

舆论的涟漪里，自然少不了女性群体的反击。她们不认同 “女权主义” 的标签，更不接受 “女性堕落” 的污蔑。
In the ripples of public opinion, the reaction from women’s groups is inevitable. They do not 认同 the label “feminism” and reject the accusation of “women’s decline.”

就我个人的观察而言，我并不认同所谓 “女权主义” 的真实存在，更对 “女性堕落导致国家堕落” 这种荒谬结论不敢苟同。女性群体，至今仍未获得男性群体发自内心的平等尊重，那种狭隘的性别偏见，依旧在社会肌理中广泛潜藏。
From my personal observation, I do not believe in the so-called “existence of feminism,” nor do I agree with the absurd conclusion that “women’s decline leads to national decline.” Women’s groups have yet to receive genuine equal respect from men, and that narrow gender bias still widely lurks in the fabric of society.

讨论这类问题之前，有个最基本的事实绕不开：我们每个人，都曾孕育于女性的母体。
Before discussing such issues, there is a fundamental fact that cannot be avoided: each of us has been nurtured in a woman’s womb.

看待女性的真实现状，得凭着良心去审视。可别只盯着表象，就忽略了她们陷入这种特殊境遇的种种缘由 —— 本末倒置的思维，只会让两性间的争论更趋激化。
To truly understand the current situation of women, one must examine it with a clear conscience. Do not just focus on the surface and ignore the various reasons why they have fallen into this special predicament — a reversal of priorities will only intensify the debate between the sexes.

往深处琢磨琢磨就会发现，在多数情况下，社会上那些看似激烈的两性纷争，未必是简单的权利对立。这更像是社会文明的局部滑坡，而滑坡的落点，恰好就在两性关系的场域里。
If you think deeply about it, you’ll realize that in most cases, the seemingly intense gender conflicts in society are not necessarily simple power struggles. This is more like a localized slide in social civilization, and the point of the slide happens to be in the field of gender relations.

过去人们谈论两性冲突，目光多集中在物质分配和家庭支配权上。但实际上，近几十年中国两性关系中最核心的问题，是女性文明的悄然倒退。
In the past, when people discussed gender conflicts, their focus was mostly on material distribution and family authority. However, the most core issue in China’s gender relations in recent decades has been the quiet regression of female civilization.

两千多年的封建帝制里，男性对女性的压制从未间断。女性不过是男性的附属品，更有甚者，沦为任人摆布的性奴。一夫多妻的制度、泛滥的青楼文化、“夫为妻纲” 的纲常礼教，桩桩件件，都是女性文明长期停滞的铁证。
For over two thousand years under feudal monarchy, men’s suppression of women never ceased. Women were merely appendages to men, and in some cases, they were reduced to sexual slaves at the mercy of others. The system of polygamy, the rampant culture of brothels, and the Confucian doctrine of “the husband is the head of the wife” were all ironclad evidence of the long-term stagnation of female civilization.

1949 年，中国女性迎来了历史性的转折。这转折，不只是人身依附关系的挣脱，更是人类文明维度上的跨越 —— 于中国，是开天辟地的；于世界，同样意义非凡。放眼全球，没有哪个大国能像中国这样，把女性解放得如此彻底。中国女性终于告别了出卖肉体的屈辱时代，没人再需要靠投身黄色产业谋生，不必再委身为妾，更不用被男性定制的封建纲常捆缚手脚。或许有人忘了，中华民国成立时虽喊出反封建的口号，可直到解放前夕，公开的卖淫业仍未绝迹，一夫多妻的事实家庭在农村更是普遍存在。
In 1949, Chinese women 迎来 a historic turning point. This turning point was not just the liberation from personal dependence but also a leap in the dimension of human civilization — for China, it was a groundbreaking moment; for the world, it was equally significant. Looking globally, no major country has liberated women as thoroughly as China. Chinese women finally bid farewell to the humiliating era of selling their bodies, no longer needing to rely on the sex industry for survival, not having to become concubines, and no longer being bound by the feudal norms prescribed by men. Perhaps some have forgotten that when the Republic of China was established, although it shouted slogans against feudalism, the open prostitution industry still existed until the eve of liberation, and factual polygamous families were still common in rural areas.

可到底什么是女性文明？
What exactly is women’s civilization?

女性文明本就是人类社会文明的有机组成部分，而人类文明的核心，不正是区别于动物世界的进步性吗？把女性文明从人类文明中抽离出来看，它的核心要义其实很简单：女性不该成为社会中的 “动物性存在”。
Women’s civilization is inherently an organic part of human society’s civilization, and the core of human civilization isn’t precisely the progressiveness that distinguishes it from the animal world? If we isolate women’s civilization from human civilization, its core essence is actually quite simple: women should not be reduced to “animalistic existences” in society.

只要社会中还普遍存在靠出卖或奉献肉体换取利益、荣誉与地位的现象，就说明女性文明仍处于落后或倒退状态。女性文明与社会文明同步的最直观标志，是女性拥有与男性同等的社会独立性 —— 职业选择的差异，只该源于体力的不同，而非性别地位的尊卑。
As long as there is a widespread phenomenon in society where women exchange their bodies or dedication for benefits, honor, and status, it indicates that women’s civilization remains in a backward or regressive state. The most direct sign of women’s civilization aligning with societal civilization is that women possess equal social independence to men — differences in career choices should stem from physical disparities, not from the superiority or inferiority of gender status.

发达国家的物质丰裕，是不是就等同于女性文明的高度？
Does the material wealth of developed countries equate to the height of women’s civilization?

答案显然是否定的。物质文明从来不是女性文明的代名词，物质的繁荣是社会整体的成果，未必能直接惠及女性群体。即便在物质高度发达的国家，仍有相当一部分女性深陷卑微处境，不得不靠出卖色相、肉体与尊严苟活。就像我们的邻居日韩，经济再发达，也不代表其女性文明实现了实质提升 —— 日本 “情趣产业” 的泛滥，就赤裸裸地暴露了其女性文明的短板。
The answer is clearly no. Material civilization has never been synonymous with women’s civilization; material prosperity is the result of society as a whole, and may not directly benefit women. Even in materially highly developed countries, a significant portion of women remain trapped in humble circumstances, forced to survive by selling their appearance, bodies, and dignity. Take our neighbors Japan and South Korea, for example; no matter how economically advanced they become, it doesn’t necessarily mean their women’s civilization has achieved substantial improvement — the rampant “情趣 industry” in Japan starkly exposes the shortcomings of its women’s civilization.

上世纪八十年代，中国女性的流动性迎来了爆发期，她们能像男性一样奔赴全国各地谋求生计。这本该是文明进步的有力佐证，可后续的发展却不尽如人意，甚至让人扼腕叹息。
In the 1980s of the last century, the mobility of Chinese women entered a 爆发期, where they could travel across the country just like men to make a living. This should have been strong evidence of civilized progress, but subsequent developments were far from satisfactory, even causing people to sigh in frustration.

大概到了九十年代，街头巷尾突然冒出密密麻麻的美发厅、洗澡城、洗脚城和按摩城，里面的从业者几乎全是女性。
Around the 1990s,美容院、洗浴城、足浴城 and massage parlors suddenly sprang up everywhere, with almost all practitioners being women.

若用健康的视角审视，这些职业本无不可，都是合法的谋生手段。可现实的底色却令人不安，不少场所早已偏离了主业轨道。美发厅里不见理发工具，只有浓妆艳抹的女子；洗脚按摩只是幌子，背后藏着的是肮脏的肉体交易。北方的 “天上人间”、南方城市的黄色产业链，曾是国人心中难以抹去的痛，它们堂而皇之地 “辉煌” 了好些年。
From a healthy perspective, these occupations were not inherently problematic, as they were all legitimate means of making a living. However, the reality was unsettling, as many venues had long deviated from their primary purpose.理发工具 were absent in 美容院, only heavily made-up women were seen;洗脚按摩 were just a facade, behind which lay dirty flesh trade. The “天上的人间” in the north and the yellow industry in southern cities were once indelible pains in the hearts of the Chinese people, and they had “thrived” for many years.

除了这些公开的灰色产业，更有诸多隐性的乱象与时光并行：三陪文化、包养之风、职场性骚扰、性胁迫与性别歧视，乃至出卖初夜、性侵频发，还有泛滥的黄色视频直播与女性擦边直播 —— 这些乱象的受害者，始终都是女性。
Besides these open grey industries, there were also numerous hidden issues that ran parallel to the passage of time: 三陪 culture, the practice of keeping mistresses, workplace sexual harassment, sexual coercion, gender discrimination, even selling one’s virginity, frequent sexual assaults, and the rampant live-streaming of pornography and female borderline live-streaming — the victims of all these issues were always women.

无论主动还是被动，一个无法回避的事实摆在眼前：女性文明又一次滑落到了曾经的困境里，相当多的女性，不得不再次承受肉体被物化带来的煎熬。
Regardless of whether it is active or passive, an undeniable fact is staring us in the face: women’s civilization has once again slipped back into its former predicament, and a significant number of women are forced to endure the torment of their bodies being objectified once more.

社会讨论女性话题时，很容易陷入一个认知误区：过分纠结于女性的 “自愿性”。
When society discusses topics related to women, it often falls into a cognitive 误区: getting overly fixated on the “voluntariness” of women.

有女性是自愿的吗？肯定有，而且不在少数。可她们为何愿意主动退回封建时代的境遇里？答不好这个问题，就无法真正解决女性靠动物性手段谋生的困境，更谈不上实现平等女性文明的长远理想。
Are there women who are willing? Of course, and there are quite a few. But why are they willing to voluntarily return to the conditions of the feudal era? If we cannot answer this question properly, we cannot truly solve the dilemma of women relying on animalistic means to survive, let alone achieve the long-term ideal of an equal women’s civilization.

十多年前，国内开始严打色情业，表面上看成效显著，那些知名的黄色地带渐渐销声匿迹，仿佛女性文明又重归光明。
Over ten years ago, China began cracking down on the pornography industry. On the surface, the results seemed significant. Those well-known red-light districts gradually disappeared, and it seemed as if women’s civilization had returned to the light.

可真相果真如此吗？
Is the truth really like this?

有次饭局上，我还兴冲冲地夸赞社会风气清朗，说色情业早已销声匿迹。没想到话音刚落，满桌人都笑我 “脱离尘世”。他们告诉我，这行当从未真正消失，只是换了马甲 —— 线下交易转入地下，线上交易暗潮涌动，还有线上线下勾结的新模式，真是野火烧不尽，春风吹又生。
At a dinner party once, I enthusiastically praised the clarity of social atmosphere, saying the adult industry had long vanished. Unexpectedly, the moment I finished speaking, everyone at the table laughed at me for being “out of touch with the world.” They told me that this industry had never truly disappeared, but merely changed its guise — offline transactions moved underground, online transactions surged in the shadows, and there were even new models combining online and offline operations. It’s truly like wildfire that cannot be extinguished, and like grass that grows back after the wind blows.

起初我还不太信他们的话，直到几次亲身经历让我不得不正视现实。有次去湖南某地级市，住的宾馆不算高档，深夜回房时，发现门缝里塞着好几张色情卡片，上面的招揽话术直白得刺眼；再后来去江西某地旅游，在一个知名景区的卫生间里，居然看到小便池壁上贴着 “上门按摩” 的小广告，那露骨的暗示，根本不用细想就能明白背后的勾当。就在昨晚，我从一家酒店吃完饭出来，还在门口不远处的地上，看到一堆被丢弃的色情小广告。更让人费解的是，前不久还有某省相关部门提议，让公众包容 “个性化女性陪游服务”，称这也是刺激经济的手段。
At first, I didn’t quite believe them, but several personal experiences forced me to face reality. Once, when I traveled to a prefecture-level city in Hunan, the hotel I stayed in wasn’t particularly luxurious, but when I returned to my room late at night, I found several adult service flyers slipped under the door. The wording on them was bluntly provocative; later, when I traveled to a famous scenic spot in Jiangxi, I actually saw a small ad for “home massage” stuck on the wall of a urinal. The crude implications were unmistakable, making it clear what the underlying activities were. Just last night, after having dinner at a hotel, I stepped outside and saw a pile of discarded adult service flyers on the ground not far from the entrance. Even more baffling is that recently, relevant departments in a province proposed allowing the public to tolerate “personalized female companion services,” claiming this was also a way to stimulate the economy.

无论如何狡辩，只要把女性当作 “陪侍” 的工具，就是女性文明的耻辱，这一点没有任何转圜的余地。
No matter how much they try to justify it, treating women as tools for “companionship” is a disgrace to women’s civilization, and there is absolutely no room for compromise on this point.

如今，中国女性的拒婚意愿远高于男性，拒育的想法也更为普遍，最终直接导致生育率断崖式下滑。她们不是不想拥有家庭，而是害怕婚姻变成一场风险极高的对赌游戏。
Nowadays, the willingness of Chinese women to refuse marriage is far higher than that of men, and the idea of refusing to have children is also more common, ultimately leading to a sharp decline in fertility rates. They are not unwilling to have a family, but rather afraid that marriage will turn into a high-risk gamble.

表面上看，似乎是少数女性个体出了问题？可往深了想就会发现，根子其实在女性文明本身。这不是女性的错，而是物质文明畸形发展后，社会给女性追求幸福的道路设置了太多障碍。女性群体用沉默的拒绝发起反抗 —— 这种不符合男权社会常理的拒绝，恰恰让社会感受到了深刻的危机。
On the surface, it might seem that the problem lies with a few individual women? But if you think deeper, you’ll realize that the root of the issue actually lies in women’s civilization itself. This is not the fault of women, but rather the result of the 畸形 development of material civilization, which has set up too many obstacles for women in their pursuit of happiness. The women’s collective silent refusal is a form of resistance — this rejection, which goes against the norms of a male-dominated society, has actually made society feel a profound crisis.

不管是男性还是女性，选择做什么、不做什么，本质上都是受对幸福的追求驱动。当一个群体集体抗拒某种选择时，必然是这条道路上存在难以逾越的障碍。
Whether men or women, what they choose to do or not do is essentially driven by the pursuit of happiness. When a group collectively resists a certain choice, it must be because there are insurmountable obstacles on that path.

关于女性文明，我有个个人判断：近四十年来，它一直处于下滑趋势，至今没有出现明显的扭转信号。
Regarding women’s civilization, I have a personal judgment: in the past four decades, it has been in a downward trend, and so far, there have been no obvious signs of a reversal.

既然如此，就不得不回头探寻女性文明下滑的根源。
Since that is the case, one cannot help but look back to explore the roots of the decline of female civilization.

追根溯源，性文化的劣变或许是最先撕开缺口的推手。上世纪八十年代，知识分子向国内传播的，并非西方的先进文化，反倒多是基于性的糟粕。他们拿 “国外的性开放” 对标 “中国女性的保守”，胡乱用人类的原始动物性定义人性，甚至污蔑新中国的婚姻制度和两性关系 “灭绝人性”。他们高呼，要找回人性，就得拥抱性开放。
Tracing back to the source, the deterioration of sex culture may have been the first to tear open the wound. In the 1980s, intellectuals spread to China were not the advanced culture of the West, but rather the dregs based on sex. They used “foreign sexual openness” to compare with “Chinese female conservatism,” arbitrarily defining human nature with the primitive animality of humans, and even vilifying the marriage system and gender relations of the New China as “extinguishing humanity.” They shouted that to reclaim humanity, one must embrace sexual openness.

当年，《少女之心》的广泛流传，成了性开放思潮的试探性注脚。这本读物不仅在成年人中传播，更渗透到青少年群体，影响之深、范围之广，难以估量。
At that time, the widespread popularity of *The Heart of a Young Girl* became a tentative footnote to the trend of sexual openness. This reading material was not only spread among adults but also 渗透 ed into the youth group, with its influence and scope being immeasurable.

可 “性开放” 被当作 “先进文化” 引入后，人们真正看重的不是性科学，而是性的工具化利用。这个过程中，女性成了最大的受害者 —— 不仅是肉体上的创伤，更要承受性病传播的风险。说到底，中国性文化的劣质化，从根本上破坏了女性健康生存的土壤与环境。
However, after “sexual openness” was introduced as “advanced culture,” what people truly valued was not sexology but the instrumental use of sex. In this process, women became the biggest victims—not only physical trauma but also the risk of sexually transmitted diseases. In the end, the deterioration of China’s sex culture fundamentally destroyed the soil and environment for women’s healthy survival.

比性文化劣变更直接的，是女性器官被异化为 “劳动工具” 的错位认知。上世纪九十年代后，不少国内知识分子开始鼓吹一种荒谬的理念：卖淫也是劳动。他们的论据是，某些西方国家存在职业卖淫者，还持有执业证件。
What is even more direct than the inferiority complex of gender culture is the distorted perception that female organs are alienated into “labor tools.” After the 1990s, many domestic intellectuals began to promote a ridiculous notion: prostitution is also labor. Their argument was that some Western countries had professional prostitutes who even held practicing certificates.

“西方有的就是正确的”，这种认知在相当长一段时间里成了部分人的信条。谁要是提出反对，就被扣上 “封闭保守”“反对开放”“逆历史潮流” 的帽子。可卖淫真的是劳动吗？显然不是，绝对不是。
“The West has, therefore, it is correct,” this mindset became a credo for some during a considerable period. Anyone who dared to oppose it was labeled as “close-minded and conservative,” “opposing openness,” or “going against the historical trend.” But is prostitution really labor? Clearly not, absolutely not.

劳动的核心是创造产品或价值，而卖淫既不基于情感，也与生育无关，甚至连纯粹的动物行为都算不上，顶多只能算是一种亚动物性的发泄，一种被奴役的生存状态。性器官从来不是劳动工具，把它当作工具的，不过是些丧失良知的知识分子。这种错误认知，正是女性文明严重倒退的直接诱因之一。
The core of labor is creating products or value, while prostitution is neither based on emotion nor related to reproduction, nor even qualified as pure animal behavior. At most, it can only be considered a sub-animalistic release, a state of servitude for survival. Female organs have never been labor tools; those who treat them as such are merely intellectuals who have lost their conscience. This wrong perception is one of the direct causes of the severe regression in female civilization.

畸形的名利观，更是在女性文明的伤口上撒了把盐。致富的路径有很多种，既有符合人类文明发展的正当方式，也有扭曲灵魂的畸形手段。正当的致富绝不会包含靠性器官牟利，可 “不惜一切代价致富” 的观念，却把这种卑劣手段囊括其中。黄色产业、职场性交易，一旦做到极致，确实有可能快速积累财富。
The distorted view of fame and fortune has also salted the wound of female civilization. There are many ways to get rich, both those that align with the development of human civilization and those that twist the soul. Justifiable ways to accumulate wealth would never include profiting from female organs, but the mindset of “achieving wealth at any cost” includes this base method. The pornography industry and workplace sexual transactions, when taken to the extreme, can indeed accumulate wealth rapidly.

中国不少流行语，都藏着这种扭曲的致富观：“笑贫不笑娼”“不要跟钱过不去”“男人有钱就变坏，女人变坏就有钱”…… 演艺圈的糜烂生活、女性出嫁时的高额彩礼、骗婚牟利的乱象、高价拐卖女性的罪恶，这些都不是女性地位提升的表现，而是封建有毒思想的死灰复燃。只有地位极度低下的人，才会被当作商品买卖。即便给这些行为贴上现代文明的标签，也掩盖不了女性被当作敛财工具的真相。
Many popular sayings in China hide this twisted view of getting rich: “laugh at poverty but not at prostitution,” “don’t make enemies with money,” “men turn bad when they get rich, and women get rich when they turn bad”… The decadent lives in the entertainment industry, the exorbitant bride prices when women marry, the phenomenon of profiting from fraudulent marriages, and the heinous crime of selling women at high prices are not signs of improved women’s status, but rather the resurgence of toxic feudal thinking. Only those at an extremely low social status are treated as commodities to be bought and sold. Even if these behaviors are labeled with the tag of modern civilization, they cannot hide the truth that women are being used as tools for making money.

还有一个不可忽视的原因，是女性不安全感催生的 “身体置换” 现象。新中国成立后，无论女性从事何种职业，都不会面临生存权被威胁的困境：农村不能剥夺女性的务农权利，工厂领导无权随意开除女工，任何单位录用或辞退女性，都必须遵循正规程序。
There is also an undeniable reason: the “body exchange” phenomenon born from women’s lack of security. After the founding of New China, women, regardless of their profession, would not face the threat to their right to survive: rural areas could not deprive women of their right to farm, factory leaders had no right to arbitrarily fire female workers, and any organization had to follow formal procedures when hiring or dismissing women.

可后来，私营经济体越来越多，法律的约束却没能及时跟上。相当多从事不稳定职业的女性，开始面临生存权的威胁。不少人被迫用身体换取劳动权，有人选择隐忍，有人奋起抗争，可抗争的结果往往是既失去工作，又丢掉尊严。
Later, however, with the increasing number of private economies, the legal constraints did not keep up in time. A significant number of women in unstable jobs began to face threats to their right to survive. Many were forced to trade their bodies for the right to work. Some chose to endure, while others fought back, but the outcome of the struggle was often losing their jobs and their dignity.

当 “身体置换权利” 渐渐形成一种潜规则，就会像病毒一样蔓延到各个行业，渗透到社会的每一个细胞。最可怕的是，优秀女性的成功，很容易被贴上 “可能存在性交易” 的恶意标签。当现实中确实有个别女性官员因性交易落马时，更会固化这种偏见，无端抹黑大多数清白女性的形象，进一步拉低女性文明的底线。
When the “right to body exchange” gradually forms a kind of unwritten rule, it will spread like a virus to every industry and penetrate every cell of society. The most frightening is that the success of outstanding women is 很容易被 labeled with the malicious tag of “possibly engaging in sexual transactions.” When there are indeed isolated cases of female officials falling due to sexual transactions in reality, it further solidifies this prejudice, unfairly tarnishing the image of most innocent women, and further lowering the moral 底线 of women’s civilization.

四十年前，中国人的脑海里根本没有这种荒谬的标签，只有 “妇女能顶半边天” 的信念。后来为什么会变成这样？是女性的错吗？从根源上说，显然不是。我认识的女性，都是凭借自己的智慧和努力打拼事业，不过这并非我今天要阐述的重点。
Forty years ago, there was no such absurd label in the minds of Chinese people; only the belief that “women can hold up half the sky.” Why did it become this way later? Is it the fault of women? Fundamentally, it is clearly not. The women I know have all fought for their careers with their wisdom and hard work, but this is not the main point I want to elaborate on today.

值得深思的是，男性群体面对显而易见的性交易产业，既没有站出来勇敢纠错，反而有不少人乐于推波助澜。这场悲剧的受害者，从来不止女性，许多男性何尝不是连带受损？女性文明的下坠，未必只关乎女性本身，它同样反映出部分男性人格尊严的缺失。
What is worth reflecting on is that the male community, when faced with the obvious sex trade industry, did not stand up to correct the wrongs; instead, many were happy to fan the flames. The victims of this tragedy have never been just women; many men have also been indirectly harmed. The decline of female civilization is not necessarily only about women themselves; it also reflects the lack of personal dignity in some men.

除了这四点，还有没有更深层的原因？答案是肯定的。只是有些原因，眼下还不便深究，只能留待未来研究，写给子孙后代看。
Besides these four points, are there deeper reasons? The answer is affirmative. However, some reasons are not yet suitable to delve into deeply, and can only be left for future research to be written for future generations.

怎样才能让女性文明重新走上上升轨道，回归健康发展的大道？
How can female civilization return to an upward trajectory and regain a healthy path of development?

这里面有个最基本的道理：男性与女性，本就是人类社会和谐共生的另一半。任何一方的缺位或抗拒，都不可能实现真正的社会和谐。
There is a fundamental principle here: men and women are inherently the two halves that harmoniously coexist in human society. The absence or resistance of either side cannot achieve true social harmony.

女性文明当前的困局依旧清晰：部分女性的肉体被异化为利益交换的筹码，而男性，尚未从灵魂深处真正懂得尊重女性的和谐地位。
The current predicament of female civilization remains clear: the physical bodies of some women have been transformed into chips for transactional exchanges, while men have yet to truly understand and respect women’s harmonious status from the depths of their souls.

我绝没有鼓励女权主义的意思，只是坚信，一个真正文明的社会，必须拒绝女性在无情感基础的前提下利用身体牟利。物质匮乏的年代我们尚且能做到这一点，如今物质丰裕了，未来更没有理由做不到。
I definitely do not mean to encourage feminism; I simply believe that a truly civilized society must reject the idea of women profiting at the expense of their bodies without a foundation of emotional connection. We were able to uphold this principle even in times of material scarcity, and now that we are more materially abundant, there is no reason at all why we should fail to do so in the future.

修复女性文明的第一步，必须是斩断 “用女性肉体换取利益” 的链条。
The first step in repairing female civilization must be to sever the chain of “exchanging female bodies for benefits.”

再强调一次，我们每个人都孕育于女性的母体 —— 这是讨论所有女性问题的伦理起点，也是不可逾越的底线。
Emphasize once again, each of us is nurtured in the female womb — this is the ethical starting point for discussing all women’s issues and an irreducible bottom line.

女性文明，从来都不是中国独有的课题，而是全人类共同的文明命题。
Female civilization has never been a unique topic of China, but rather a common civilizational question for all of humanity.

以上文章由互联网转载，不代表个人观点，供大家阅读。
The above article is reprinted from the Internet and does not represent personal views, for everyone to read.

无不良内容，无不良影响。
No harmful content, no harmful effects.

分享对社会男女关系的观点。
Share your views on the relationship between men and women in society.

本文章遵守互联网相关法律规定。
This article complies with relevant laws and regulations of the internet.

遵守《抖音社区自律公约》。
Adhere to the “Douyin Community Self-Discipline Agreement.”

本文严厉批判物化女性 异化男女关系 侮辱女性等观点，宣扬良好思想。

This article severely criticizes the objectification of women, the alienation of the relationship between men and women, and the disrespect towards women, while promoting positive values.

所有命好的人都有一个共性：主体性极强 2026-01-11 阅读需要26分钟 前几天，跟一个做投资的朋友喝茶。
All successful people share a common trait: they are extremely proactive 2026-01-11 Reading time: 26 minutes A few days ago, I had tea with a friend who works in investment.

他投了不少早期项目，阅人无数，我逗他，说你现在是不是炼成了火眼金睛，看人一眼，就知道他能不能成事。
He has invested in many early-stage projects and knows a vast number of people. I jokingly asked him if he had now become like a fire-eyed Bodhidharma, able to tell at a glance whether someone could succeed.

他呷了口茶，没正面回答，反而给我讲了个事。
He took a sip of tea and didn’t answer directly, instead telling me a story.

说他前阵子见了两个创业者，做的项目类似，都是这两年很火的健康消费赛道。
He said he recently met two entrepreneurs who were working on similar projects, both in the very hot health consumer track that has been popular in the past two years.

一个，暂且叫他A。
One, let’s call him A.

A一坐下来，就开始滔滔不绝。
As soon as A sat down, he started talking non-stop.

讲风口，讲趋势，讲他的产品概念有多么领先，商业模式吊打所有同行。PPT做得天花乱坠，数据模型完美无瑕。
He spoke about trends, about concepts, about how his product was far ahead of the competition, and how his business model outperformed all competitors. His PowerPoint presentation was dazzling, and the data models were flawless.

朋友听了半小时，打断他，问了个很简单的问题：“你这个产品，从0到1，最难的地方在哪？你是怎么解决的？”
After listening for half an hour, a friend interrupted him and asked a simple question: “For your product, what is the hardest part in going from 0 to 1? How did you solve it?”

A愣了一下，然后开始绕。
A paused for a moment, then started to evade.

说这个嘛，主要看团队执行力，我们团队很牛。也看市场教育，我们准备花大钱投广告。还看供应链，我们正在跟几家大厂谈。
Well, it mainly depends on the team’s execution ability, and our team is excellent. It also depends on market education, we are ready to spend a lot of money on advertising. It also depends on the supply chain, we are currently negotiating with several major manufacturers.

绕来绕去，就是没一句准话。
Evasive and vague, without a single definitive answer.

给人的感觉，他像一个剧本的朗读者，而不是编剧。他所有的宏大叙事，都建立在“如果……就……”的沙盘推演上，建立在外部资源的完美配合上。
It gives the impression that he is like a narrator of a script, rather than a writer. All his grand narratives are built on “if…then…” sandbox simulations, built on the perfect coordination of external resources.

朋友说，他当时心里就画了个叉。
A friend said that he drew a cross in his mind at that time.

这个人，悬。
This person, he’s in a tight spot.

没过多久，见了第二个创业者，叫他B。
Not long after, he met a second entrepreneur, let’s call him B.

B的PPT很粗糙，甚至有点丑。讲起话来，也远没有A那么流利。
B’s PowerPoint presentation was rough, even a bit ugly. When he spoke, he was far less fluent than A.

但他一开口，就在讲问题。
But as soon as he opened his mouth, he started talking about the problem.

“我一开始想做这个产品，最大的坎，是原料。市面上都说自己的是最好的，但我测了十几家，全是坑。为了找到真正干净的原料，我带团队在那个山沟沟里蹲了两个月，天天跟农户泡在一起，才搞定。”
“I initially wanted to make this product, and the biggest hurdle was the raw materials. Everyone in the market claims their own are the best, but I tested over a dozen suppliers, and they were all scams. To find truly clean raw materials, I took my team into those mountain gullies and stayed there for two months, spending every day with the farmers, before finally succeeding.”

“第二个坎，是信任。用户凭什么信你？光说没用。我搞了个笨办法，把我们每一批产品的质检报告，都生成二维码印在包装上，谁买的谁扫，自己看。成本高，但买过的人，基本都复购了。”
“The second hurdle was trust. Why would users trust you? Words alone aren’t enough. I came up with a crude solution: we generate a QR code for each batch’s quality inspection report and print it on the packaging. Anyone who buys it can scan it and check for themselves. It’s costly, but those who have bought it have mostly repurchased.”

“第三个坎，是起盘。没钱投广告，怎么办？我找到第一批天使用户，就服务好这50个人，跟他们做朋友，让他们给我提意见，产品改了8个版本。然后，这50个人，给我带来了第一批500个客户。”
“The third hurdle was scaling up. Without money to invest in advertising, what could I do? I found my first batch of superusers and focused on serving these 50 people well, becoming friends with them, and getting their feedback. The product went through eight versions. Then, these 50 people brought me my first 500 customers.”

朋友说，B全程没提一句“风口”，没画一张“大饼”。
My friend said that B never mentioned “trend” once and didn’t paint any “big pictures.”

他说的每一个字，都像从地里刨出来的，带着泥土的腥味。
Every word he said was like something dug out of the ground, carrying the earthy smell.

你问他任何一个细节，他都能给你讲出背后的坑，以及他是怎么一步一步填平的。
Ask him any detail, and he could tell you about the pitfalls behind it and how he gradually filled them in step by step.

那天聊完，朋友当场就拍板了投资意向。
After the conversation that day, my friend immediately approved the investment intention.

他转头对我说：“你看，差别就在这。A把自己当成了一艘等待风来的船，风越大，他越兴奋。但他从没想过，如果没风，甚至风向变了，他该怎么办。”
He turned to me and said, “Look, the difference lies here. A considers himself a ship waiting for the wind; the stronger the wind, the more excited he gets. But he never thought about what he would do if there was no wind, or even if the wind direction changed.”

“而B，他从一开始，就把自己当成了发动机。他不在乎有没有风，甚至可以逆风。因为他自己，就是动力的来源。”
“Meanwhile, B has always considered himself an engine. He doesn’t care whether there’s wind or not, and can even move against the wind. Because he himself is the source of the power.”

朋友最后总结了一句，他说，聊了这么多年项目，见了这么多人，发现所有那些最后能成事、能持续拿到结果、命特别“好”的人，都有一个完全相同的底层特质。
My friend concluded with a final thought. He said that after talking about projects for so many years and meeting so many people, he discovered that all those who ultimately succeeded, could consistently deliver results, and had particularly “good” fates, shared a completely identical underlying trait.”

我说，是什么？
I asked, “What is it?”

他说：主体性极强。
He said: It has a very strong subjectivity.

什么是“主体性”？
What is “subjectivity”?

这个词听起来有点学术，有点玄。
This term sounds a bit academic and a bit mystical.

但我一说你就明白。
But I’ll explain it to you and you’ll understand.

主体性，就是你是否把自己当成自己生命这部电影的“主角”和“导演”。
Subjectivity is whether you see yourself as the “protagonist” and “director” of the movie of your own life.

还是，你心甘情愿地，把自己活成了一个“配角”或者“群众演员”。
Or, whether you willingly live as a “supporting actor” or a “extra.”

主体性强的人，他的精神内核是“我”字开头的。
People with strong subjectivity, their spiritual core starts with the word “I.”

我决定，我选择，我负责，我创造。
I decide, I choose, I am responsible, I create.

他的人生剧本，台词是自己写的。哪怕写得不好，他也有权修改。
The script of his life, the lines are written by himself. Even if it’s not well-written, he has the right to revise it.

主体性弱的人，他的精神内核是“他”字开头的。
People with weak subjectivity, their spiritual core starts with the word “he.”

他怎么看？他会同意吗？他会不会不高兴？
How does he see it? Will he agree? Will he be unhappy?

或者，是“它”字开头的。
Or, it starts with the word “it.”

大环境不好。运气太差。原生家庭的错。
The environment is bad. Too bad luck. It’s the fault of one’s family of origin.

他的人生剧本，是被别人递过来的，他只负责照着念。念错了，还要怪剧本写得烂。
His life script was handed to him by others; he only needs to read it aloud. If he reads it wrongly, he still blames the script for being poorly written.

我见过一个女孩，长得漂亮，工作体面，所有人都觉得她命好。
I’ve met a girl who was beautiful, had a decent job, and everyone thought she was lucky.

但她活得极其痛苦。
But she lived an extremely painful life.

她跟我说，她感觉自己像一个提线木偶。
She told me she felt like a marionette.

从小到大，穿什么衣服，是妈妈觉得好看的。
From childhood to adulthood, what clothes to wear was what her mother thought was pretty.

高考报什么志愿，是爸爸认为有前途的。
What major to apply for in the college entrance exam was what her father thought had a future.

找的男朋友，是亲戚朋友都觉得“般配”的。
The boyfriend she found was what relatives and friends all thought was a “good match.”

她的人生，是一场被精心安排的“正确”。每一个节点，都踩在了社会时钟最标准的刻度上。
Her life was a meticulously arranged “correctness.” Every milestone she reached was timed perfectly to the most standard marks on society’s clock.

但她没有一天，是为自己活的。
But not a single day did she live for herself.

她问我：“陈秋，我是不是有病？所有人都羡慕我，我却觉得不快乐。”
She asked me, “Chen Qiu, do I have a disease? Everyone envies me, yet I feel unhappy.”

我说，你没病。
I said, “You’re not sick.”

你只是把人生的“主语”搞丢了。
You’ve just lost the “subject” of life.

一个没有主语的人生，无论看起来多么光鲜亮丽，本质上都是一场漫长的自我流放。你把自己流放出了自己的生命。
A life without a subject, no matter how glamorous it may appear, is essentially a long self-exile. You’ve exiled yourself from your own life.

这才是现代人最深层的精神危机。
This is the deepest spiritual crisis of modern people.

我们拥有了前所未有的物质选择权，却丢失了最根本的精神决定权。
We have unprecedented material choices, yet we’ve lost the most fundamental spiritual decision-making power.

你可以选择买A品牌的口红还是B品牌的香水，但你不敢选择自己到底想过一种什么样的人生。
You can choose to buy lipstick from brand A or perfume from brand B, but you dare not choose what kind of life you truly want to live.

你可以选择午餐吃日料还是西餐，但你不敢选择一份不被父母看好，但自己真正热爱的事业。
You can choose to have Japanese or Western food for lunch, but you dare not choose a career that is not favored by your parents but that you truly love.

你的自由，是一种被限定在消费菜单里的“伪自由”。
Your freedom is a “false freedom” limited to the menu of consumption.

而在真正决定命运走向的重大课题上，你选择了“听话”。
And when it comes to the major issues that truly determine your destiny, you choose to “obey.”

听父母的话，听老师的话，听伴侣的话，听社会舆论的话，听KOL的话。
Listen to your parents, listen to your teachers, listen to your partner, listen to public opinion, listen to KOLs.

你唯独，听不见自己内心深处那个微弱的声音。
You alone, cannot hear that faint voice deep within your heart.

久而久之，那个声音就消失了。
Over time, that voice disappears.

你成了一个完美的“客体”。
You become a perfect “object.”

一个被动的接收器，一个精准的执行者，一个情绪的响应器。
A passive receiver, an accurate executor, an emotional responder.

别人夸你一句，你高兴半天。
If someone compliments you, you’re happy for days.

别人损你一句，你郁闷一天。
If someone criticizes you, you’re down for a day.

热搜上流行什么，你赶紧去追。
What’s trending on the hot search, you quickly chase after it.

大V说哪个行业好，你恨不得马上转行。
The big V says which industry is good, and you can’t wait to switch careers.

你像一颗漂浮在信息海洋里的水草，浪头把你推向东，你就飘向东，浪头把你卷向西，你就飘向西。
You are like an aquatic plant floating in the ocean of information; when the waves push you east, you drift east, and when the waves pull you west, you drift west.

你从来没有想过，你可以，也应该，给自己装一个“锚”。
You have never thought that you could, and should, install an “anchor” for yourself.

这个锚，就是你的主体性。
This anchor is your subjectivity.

有了它，你才能在波涛汹涌的世相洪流中，定住自己的位置。
With it, you can anchor your position in the turbulent flow of the world.

你才能从一个“被动反应者”，转变为一个“主动创造者”。
You can transform from a “passive reactor” to an “active creator.”

这，就是分野。
This is the division.

是普通人与高手之间，那条看不见的鸿沟。
The invisible chasm between ordinary people and experts.

为什么绝大多数人，都丧失了主体性？
Why have the vast majority of people lost their subjectivity?

这背后，有三个隐形的“小偷”，在不知不觉中，偷走了你的力量。
Behind this, there are three invisible “thieves” that, without realizing it, have stolen your strength.

第一个小偷，叫“好孩子”的魔咒。
The first thief is called the “good child” curse.

我们绝大多数人，都是在“你应该”的教育模式下长大的。
The vast majority of us grew up under the “you should” education model.

你应该好好学习。
You should study hard.

你应该听话懂事。
You should be obedient and well-behaved.

你应该找个稳定的工作。
You should find a stable job.

你应该到了年龄就结婚生子。
You should get married and have children when you reach the right age.

在这种模式下，“听话”被定义为最高的美德。
In this mode, “obedience” is defined as the highest virtue.

一个孩子，如果过早地表现出强烈的个人意愿，往往会被视为“叛逆”、“不服管教”。
A child who shows strong personal will too early is often seen as “rebellious” or “disobedient.”

为了得到父母和老师的爱与认可，我们学会了压抑自己的真实感受，去迎合那个“好孩子”的标准。
To gain love and approval from parents and teachers, we learn to suppress our true feelings and conform to the standard of a “good child.”

我们像一个雷达，24小时扫描着权威人士的脸色、语气、眼神，随时调整自己的行为，以确保自己是“正确的”、“被喜欢的”。
We act like a radar, scanning the expressions, tone, and gaze of authority figures 24/7, constantly adjusting our behavior to ensure we are “correct” and “liked.”

这是一个生存策略。
This is a survival strategy.

它帮助我们安然度过了脆弱的童年。
It helped us navigate through our vulnerable childhood safely.

但这个策略，会变成一个刻骨铭心的“肌肉记忆”，延续到成年后的方方面面。
But this strategy, it becomes an indelible “muscle memory,” extending to all aspects of life after adulthood.

于是，在公司里，你不敢跟老板提不同意见，哪怕你知道他是错的。
Thus, in the company, you dare not voice a different opinion to your boss, even if you know he is wrong.

在亲密关系里，你不敢拒绝伴侣的不合理要求，生怕他会离开你。
In intimate relationships, you dare not refuse your partner’s unreasonable demands, fearing he will leave you.

在社交中，你不敢表达真实的观点，总是附和大多数人的声音，成为一个“好好先生”。
In social interactions, you dare not express your true opinions, always conforming to the majority’s voice, becoming a “nice guy.”

你把整个世界，都当成了你的“父母”。
You have taken the entire world as your “parents.”

你终其一生，都在寻求那个虚幻的“乖孩子”勋章。
You spend your entire life seeking that illusory “good child” medal.

代价，就是彻底让渡了人生的主导权。
The cost is that the 主导权 of life is completely relinquished.

第二个小偷，叫“标准答案”的幻觉。
The second thief is the illusion of “standard answers.”

从小学到大学，我们经历了无数场考试。
From elementary school to university, we have experienced countless exams.

每一场考试，都有一个特点：它一定有标准答案。
Every exam has one characteristic: it must have a standard answer.

填空题，有标准答案。
Fill-in-the-blank questions, with standard answers.

选择题，有标准答案。
Multiple-choice questions, with standard answers.

甚至连阅读理解和作文，都有所谓的“得分点”和“标准范文”。
Even for reading comprehension and writing, there are so-called “scoring points” and “standard model answers.”

这套系统，训练出我们一种强大的思维定势：
This system has trained us to develop a strong mindset:

任何问题，都必然存在一个唯一的、正确的、隐藏在别处的“标准答案”。
Any problem must necessarily have a unique, correct, and hidden “standard answer” somewhere else.

而我的任务，就是找到它。
My task is to find it.

怎么找？
How to find it?

问老师，问学霸，问参考书。
Ask the teacher, ask the top student, ask the reference book.

这个思维定势，一旦被建立，就极其可怕。
This mindset, once established, is incredibly frightening.

它会让我们在踏入社会这个没有标准答案的真实世界后，彻底无所适从。
It will make us completely lost when we step into the real world without standard answers, such as society.

面对职业选择，我们想知道，哪个行业是“标准答案”？
Facing career choices, we wonder, which industry is the “standard answer”?

面对婚姻抉择，我们想知道，什么样的人是“标准答案”？
Facing marriage decisions, we wonder, what kind of person is the “standard answer”?

面对育儿难题，我们想知道，哪种教育方法是“标准答案”？
Facing parenting challenges, we wonder, what educational method is the “standard answer”?

我们像一个焦慮的考生，四处寻找“人生攻略”和“成功秘籍”。
We act like anxious candidates, searching everywhere for “life strategies” and “success secrets.”

我们把那些所谓的成功人士、大V网红，当成了手握标准答案的“出题人”。
We treat those so-called successful people and popular influencers as “question setters” holding the standard answers.

他们说，要搞流量。我们就冲去做直播。
They say, “You need to focus on traffic.” So we rush to do live streams.

他们说，要懂人性。我们就跑去学PUA。
They say, one must understand human nature. So we went out to learn PUA.

他们说，要会搞关系。我们就到处去混圈子。
They say, one must be good at networking. So we went around mingling in circles.

我们忙于抄写各路“大神”的“标准答案”，却忘了最根本的一件事：
We were busy copying the “standard answers” from various “gurus,” yet forgot the most fundamental thing:

你的人生，不是一场标准化考试。
Your life is not a standardized test.

它是一场开放式的创作。
It is an open-ended creation.

没有任何人，能为你的人生提供标准答案。
No one can provide a standard answer for your life.

因为，出题人，就是你自己。
Because, the questioner, is yourself.

答案，也只能由你自己，一笔一划地去写就。
The answer can only be written by you, stroke by stroke.

第三个小偷，叫“即时反馈”的毒药。
The third thief, called the poison of “instant feedback.”

这是移动互联网时代，最厉害的一个小偷。
This is the most formidable thief in the era of mobile internet.

它用一种极其温柔的方式，瓦解你的心智。
It dismantles your mind in an extremely gentle way.

你发一条朋友圈，立刻就有人点赞评论。
You post a message on a social media platform, and someone immediately likes and comments on it.

你刷一个短视频，指尖一划，下一个刺激马上就来。
You swipe through a short video, with a flick of your finger, the next thrill comes right away.

你玩一把游戏，输赢胜负，几分钟内就见分晓。
You play a game, win or lose, the outcome is clear within minutes.

这种“即时操作，即时反馈”的模式，让我们的大脑，越来越沉溺于一种廉价的快感。
This “instant action, instant feedback” model makes our brains increasingly addicted to cheap pleasure.

我们变得越来越没有耐心，去等待一个需要时间酝酿的结果。
We are becoming increasingly impatient to wait for a result that requires time to develop.

我们写一篇文章，如果24小时内阅读量不高，就立刻断定“这条路走不通”。
We write an article, if the reading volume is not high within 24 hours, we immediately conclude “this path doesn’t work.”

我们学一项技能，如果一个月内看不到明显进步，就马上放弃，转头去追下一个“风口”。
We learn a skill, if we don’t see obvious progress within a month, we immediately give up and turn to chase the next “trend.”

我们对一个人好，如果对方没有马上给予同等的回报，就觉得“他不值得”。
We are good to a person, if they don’t give us an equal return immediately, we think “he/she doesn’t deserve it.”

我们变得像一个猴子，面前放着一堆香蕉。我们永远只会去拿那根最近的，而不会为了远处更大的一串香蕉，去付出一丁点的延迟和等待。
We become like monkeys, with a bunch of bananas in front of us. We will only ever reach for the nearest one, and we will never pay even a tiny bit of delay or waiting to get a bigger bunch further away.

这种对“即时反馈”的病态依赖，彻底摧毁了我们的“长期主义”能力。
This pathological dependence on “immediate feedback” completely destroys our “long-termism” ability.

而“主体性”，恰恰是“长期主义”的亲兄弟。
And “subjectivity,”恰恰 is the “long-termism”的亲兄弟。

一个主体性强的人，他的行为逻辑，不是由外部的即时反馈决定的，而是由他内在的价值坐标和长期目标决定的。
A person with strong subjectivity, his behavioral logic is not determined by external immediate feedback, but by his internal value coordinates and long-term goals.

他知道自己要去哪。
He knows where he is going.

所以，路边的掌声和嘘声，都无法让他偏离航向。
So, the applause and catcalls on the roadside cannot make him deviate from his course.

他知道自己在种一棵树。
He knows he is planting a tree.

所以，他不会因为今天没长出叶子、明天没开出花，就焦虑地把它拔出来看看。
Therefore, he won’t anxiously pull it out to check because it hasn’t sprouted leaves today or bloomed flowers tomorrow.

他活在自己的“时区”里。
He lives in his own “time zone.”

而一个丧失主体性的人，他活在别人的“朋友圈”里，活在算法的“推荐页”里，活在每一秒都在变化的“数据反馈”里。
And a person who has lost their subjectivity lives in others’ “social circles,” in the “recommendation pages” of algorithms, in the “data feedback” that changes every second.

他被外部世界，切割成了一堆散乱的碎片。
He is fragmented into scattered pieces by the external world.

这三个小偷，联手制造了一个巨大的悲剧。
These three thieves, working together, have created a huge tragedy.

它们让你，明明是自己生命的主人，却活得像一个随时可能被解雇的临时工。
They make you, who are clearly the master of your own life, live like a temporary worker who can be fired at any moment.

那么，如何从这三个小偷手里，夺回你人生的主导权？
So, how can you regain control of the main thread of your life from these three thieves?

如何重建一个强大的“主体性”？
How can you rebuild a strong “subjectivity”?

这不是一件容易的事，它需要刻意练习，甚至需要一场“灵魂的康复训练”。
This is not an easy task; it requires deliberate practice, and even requires a “soul recovery training.”

我给你三个具体的，可操作的“心法”。
I give you three specific, actionable “heart methods.”

第一心法：建立你的“认知防火墙”。
First Mindfulness: Build Your “Cognitive Firewall”.

一个主体性弱的人，他的大脑，就像一个不设防的城市。
A person with weak subjectivity, their brain is like an unprotected city.

任何信息，任何观点，都可以长驱直入，在他的脑子里跑马圈地。
Any information, any viewpoint, can break in and run wild in their mind.

今天张三说“女人就该搞事业”，她觉得对。
Today Zhang San says “Women should focus on their careers,” and she thinks it’s right.

明天李四说“家庭才是女人的归宿”，她也觉得对。
Li Si said tomorrow, “Family is a woman’s destination,” and she also felt it was right.

她的脑子，成了别人观点的跑马场。
Her mind became a racetrack for others’ viewpoints.

所以，重建主体性的第一步，是给你的大脑，安装一道“防火墙”。
So, the first step in rebuilding subjectivity is to install a “firewall” in your brain.

这道墙，就是你的“信息筛选机制”。
This wall is your “information filtering mechanism.”

你要从一个“被动的信息接收者”，变成一个“主动的信息采猎者”。
You need to change from a “passive information receiver” to an “active information hunter.”

具体怎么做？
How to do it?

主动降噪。
Active noise reduction.

审视一下你的手机。那些天天给你推送垃圾信息、贩卖焦虑的app，卸载掉。那些只会输出情绪、不说事实的博主，取关掉。那些除了炫耀和攀比，没有任何价值的朋友圈，屏蔽掉。
Take a look at your phone. Uninstall the apps that constantly push you with junk information and sell anxiety. Unfollow the bloggers who only output emotions and don’t speak facts. Block the social media feeds that are filled with nothing but bragging and comparison, adding no real value.

这就像给你的精神空间做一次“大扫除”。
This is like giving your mental space a “major cleaning.”

把不属于你的，别人强行塞给你的东西，全部清理出去。
Clear out everything that doesn’t belong to you, which others force upon you.

主题式学习。
Thematic learning.

不要再漫无目的地刷信息了。
Stop scrolling through information aimlessly.

给自己设定一个主题。
Set a theme for yourself.

比如，这个月，我的主题是“理财”。那么，我就只主动地去搜索、阅读、学习跟“理财”相关的经典书籍、深度文章、权威课程。
For example, this month, my theme is “financial management.” So, I only actively search for, read, and learn about classic books, in-depth articles, and authoritative courses related to “financial management.”

其他所有信息，都暂时与我无关。
All other information is temporarily irrelevant to me.

这能让你从“被信息投喂”，切换到“主动捕食”的模式。
This can help you switch from being “fed information” to being in an “active predation” mode.

你的认知，才能开始系统性地建立，而不是一堆散乱的碎片。
Your cognition can only begin to be systematically established, rather than a pile of scattered fragments.

信息三问。
The Three Questions of Information.

以后，再接触到任何一个观点，尤其是那些让你特别激动或者特别焦虑的观点时，在心里问自己三个问题：
From now on, when encountering any viewpoint, especially those that particularly excite or distress you, ask yourself three questions in your mind:

这是事实，还是观点？ （“今天气温30度”是事实。“今天好热”是观点。）
Is this a fact, or an opinion? (“Today’s temperature is 30 degrees” is a fact. “Today is so hot” is an opinion.)

他这么说，目的是什么？ （是为了让你焦虑然后买他的课，还是真的为了你好？）
What is the purpose of him saying this? (Is it to make you anxious and buy his course, or is it truly for your own good?)

这个观点，适用于我吗？ （他的成功经验，背后的条件、资源、时代背景，我具备吗？）
Does this perspective apply to me? (Do I possess the conditions, resources, and contextual background behind his success experience?)

当你习惯了这“三问”，你就相当于给自己的大脑，装上了一个强大的“杀毒软件”。
When you get used to asking these “three questions,” you are essentially equipping your brain with a powerful “antivirus software.”

绝大多数的“精神病毒”，都会被你拦截在门外。
The vast majority of “spiritual viruses” will be intercepted by you at the door.

你的心，会慢慢地静下来。
Your heart will gradually quiet down.

当外界的噪音消失了，你内在的声音，才有机会被听见。
When the noise of the outside world disappears, your inner voice will have a chance to be heard.

第二心法：打造你的“决策工具箱”。
The second heart method: Build your “decision toolbox.”

主体性，最终要落实在“决策”上。
Subjectivity ultimately has to be implemented in “decision.”

一个不敢决策，或者总做错误决策的人，不可能有强大的主体性。
A person who is afraid to make decisions or always makes wrong decisions cannot have strong subjectivity.

很多人之所以不敢决策，是因为他们决策靠的是“感觉”和“情绪”。
Many people are afraid to make decisions because they rely on “feelings” and “emotions” when making decisions.

感觉好，就做了。
If they feel good, they do it.

感觉不好，就不做。
If they feel bad, they don’t do it.

这跟赌博没区别。
This is no different from gambling.

一个主体性强的人，他决策，靠的是“系统”和“工具”。
A person with strong subjectivity makes decisions based on “systems” and “tools.”

他有一个自己的“工具箱”，遇到问题，就从里面拿出合适的工具来使用。
He has his own “toolkit,” and when encountering problems, he takes out the appropriate tools from it to use.

这个工具箱里，应该至少有三件工具。
This toolkit should at least contain three tools.

价值观清单。
Value List.

找一个绝对不被打扰的时间，拿出一张纸，写下你认为人生中最重要的5样东西。
Find a time when you are absolutely undisturbed, take out a piece of paper, and write down the 5 most important things in your life that you think are important.

比如：健康、家庭、成长、自由、成就感。
For example: health, family, growth, freedom, sense of achievement.

然后，给它们排个序。
Then, rank them.

这张清单，就是你人生最重要的“价值罗盘”。
This list is your most important “value compass” in life.

以后，再遇到两难的选择，就拿出来看。
In the future, whenever you face a difficult choice, just refer to it.

哪个选项，更符合你排序第一的价值观，就选哪个。
Choose the option that best aligns with your top-priority value.

比如，一个工作，薪水很高，但需要长期熬夜，损害健康。如果你的价值观第一位是“健康”，那这个选择题，就一点都不难了。
For example, a job might offer a high salary but require long hours at night, harming your health. If your top value is “health,” then this choice becomes very straightforward.

反向思考法。
Reverse thinking method.

查理·芒格说：“如果我知道自己会死在哪里，那我永远都不会去那个地方。”
Charlie Munger said, “If I knew where I would die, I would never go there.”

这就是反向思考。
This is reverse thinking.

当你想做成一件事的时候，不要总是问“我该怎么做才能成功？”，而是先问“什么会让我这件事彻底失败？”
When you want to achieve something, don’t always ask “How can I succeed?” Instead, first ask “What will make this thing completely fail?”

把所有可能导致失败的因素，一条一条写出来。
List all the factors that could lead to failure, one by one.

比如，你想减肥。
For example, you want to lose weight.

让你减肥失败的因素可能有什么？
What factors might cause you to fail in losing weight?

a. 管不住嘴，天天点奶茶烧烤。
a. Can’t control your mouth, ordering bubble tea and barbecue every day.

b. 办了健身卡，但一次都不去。
b. Got a gym membership but never go.

c. 熬夜，导致内分泌紊乱，更容易胖。
c. Staying up late disrupts the endocrine system, making it easier to gain weight.

d. 情绪一不好，就暴饮暴食。
d. Whenever I’m in a bad mood, I binge eat.

好，把这些“坑”都列出来之后，你的任务就非常清晰了：想尽一切办法，避开这些坑。
Alright, after listing out all these “traps,” your task becomes very clear: do everything you can to avoid these traps.

当你把所有通往失败的路都堵死了，剩下的那条，大概率就是通往成功的。
When you block off all the paths leading to failure, the one that remains is most likely the path to success.

小步试错法。
The method of trial and error with small steps.

很多人害怕决策，是害怕“万一错了怎么办”。
Many people are afraid of making decisions because they fear “what if they make a mistake.”

他们把每一次决策，都当成了一场“赌上全部身家的豪赌”。
They treat every decision as if it were a “high-stakes gamble.”

而高手，从来不这么想。
But experts never think this way.

他们把决策，看成是一场“低成本的科学实验”。
They view decision-making as a “low-cost scientific experiment.”

核心思想是：先别想搞个大的，先用最小的成本，跑通一个最小的闭环（MVP）。
The core idea is: don’t think about going big first, first run a minimal closed loop (MVP) with the smallest cost.

你想开个餐厅，别急着租店面、搞装修。
You want to open a restaurant, don’t rush to rent a store or renovate.

你能不能先做个私房菜，在朋友圈里卖卖看？看看大家喜不喜欢你的口味？
Can you make some private kitchen dishes first and sell them on WeChat Moments to see if people like your taste?

你想转行做自媒体，别急着辞职。
If you want to switch careers to become a self-media influencer, don’t resign immediately.

你能不能先用业余时间，运营一个号，写上30篇文章，看看能不能积累到第一批100个粉丝？
Can you first use your spare time to operate an account, write 30 articles, and see if you can accumulate the first 100 followers?

小步试错，快速反馈，及时调整。
Take small steps, test and learn, get quick feedback, and adjust promptly.

这个方法，能把“决策失败”的风险，降到最低。
This method can minimize the risk of “decision failure.”

也能让你从“对决策的恐惧”，转变为“对探索的享受”。
It can also help you transform fear of decision-making into enjoyment of exploration.

当你拥有了这三件工具，你就拥有了一个属于自己的“决策系统”。
When you have these three tools, you have your own “decision system.”

你的每一次选择，都不再是抛硬币，而是有据可依，有法可循。
Every choice you make is no longer like flipping a coin, but rather based on evidence and following established methods.

你的主体性，就会在这一次次的理性决策中，像磐石一样，越来越坚固。
Your subjectivity will become increasingly solid like a rock through these rational decisions.

第三心法：承担100%的“责任归因”。
The third heart method: take 100% “responsibility attribution”.

这是最难，但也是最关键的一步。
This is the hardest, but also the most critical step.

就是你要在你的字典里，彻底删除“受害者”这个词。
It is to completely delete the word “victim” from your dictionary.

你要发自内心地相信，你生命中发生的一切，无论好坏，最终的责任人，都是你自己。
You must believe from the bottom of your heart that everything that happens in your life, whether good or bad, ultimately has you as the responsible party.

这不是让你去自责，而是让你收回“力量”。
This isn’t about making you self-blame, but rather about reclaiming “power.”

因为，当你把原因归结于外部时，比如怪父母、怪伴侣、怪老板、怪社会……
Because, when you attribute the reasons to external factors, such as blaming parents, partners, bosses, or society…

你其实在做一件事：把改变现状的力量，交到了他们手上。
You are actually doing something: handing over the power to change the current situation to them.

只有他们变了，你才能好。
Only if they change can you be better.

但问题是，他们凭什么为你而改变？
But the question is, what gives them a reason to change for you?

于是，你就只能“等”和“怨”。
So, you can only “wait” and “complain.”

这是一种精神上的“自我阉割”。
This is a spiritual form of “self-castration.”

而当你开始进行“内部归因”时，一切都不同了。
And when you start doing “internal attribution,” everything is different.

工作不顺利，不是老板傻，而是我的能力，还没到让他无法忽视的地步。我能做些什么来提升？
Work isn’t going well, not because the boss is foolish, but because my abilities haven’t reached a point where he can’t ignore them. What can I do to improve?

关系处不好，不是对方渣，而是我没有建立边界、识人不明的课题需要修。我能做些什么来成长？
Relationships aren’t going well, not because the other person is bad, but because I haven’t established boundaries or correctly identified people, which is a topic I need to work on. What can I do to grow?

钱没赚到，不是市场差，而是我的认知和方法，还没有匹配上财富的规律。我能做些什么来学习？
Money isn’t being earned, not because the market is bad, but because my cognition and methods haven’t matched the laws of wealth yet. What can I do to learn?

你看，一旦你把归因方式，从“外部”切换到“内部”。
Look, once you switch the attribution from “external” to “internal.”

“抱怨模式”就自动切换到了“解决问题模式”。
The “complaining mode” automatically switches to the “problem-solving mode.”

你就从一个无能为力的“受害者”，变成了一个手握剧本的“操盘手”。
You change from an powerless “victim” to a “mastermind” holding the script.

力量，瞬间就回到了你自己身上。
Power instantly comes back to yourself.

这，就是主体性的终极体现。
This is the ultimate embodiment of subjectivity.

为自己的人生，负100%的责任。
To take 100% responsibility for your own life.

不再扮演那个嗷嗷待哺，等待别人来拯救你的婴儿。
No longer playing the role of that crying baby waiting for someone else to save you.

而是成为那个可以为自己遮风挡雨，甚至为别人撑起一片天的成年人。
But becoming the adult who can shelter themselves from the wind and rain, and even shelter others under their sky.

这条路，很辛苦。
This road is very tough.

因为它意味着，你再也没有借口了。
Because it means you no longer have any excuses.

但，它也是唯一一条，通往自由和强大的路。
But, it is also the only road leading to freedom and strength.

四
Four

当你开始拥有主体性，你会发现，你周围的一切，都会随之改变。
When you begin to have subjectivity, you will find that everything around you will change accordingly.

你看待金钱的方式变了。
Your perspective on money changes.

你不再把它看成是“老板发的”、“父母给的”，或者“中彩票中的”。
You no longer see it as “given by the boss,” “given by your parents,” or “won in the lottery.”

你把它看成是你为世界创造价值之后，世界给你的“回馈”和“积分”。
You see it as the “feedback” and “points” the world gives you after you create value for it.

你想要更多的积分，唯一的办法，就是去创造更多的价值。
You want more points, the only way is to create more value.

于是，你不再追着钱跑，而是开始琢磨，我能解决什么问题？我能提供什么价值？
Then, you no longer chase money, but start to think, what problems can I solve? What value can I provide?

钱，会反过来追你。
Money will chase you back.

你看待关系的方式也变了。
Your perspective on relationships also changes.

你不再寻求“被爱”，而是开始练习“去爱”。
You no longer seek “to be loved,” but begin to practice “loving.”

你不再把幸福的希望，寄托在另一个人身上。因为你知道，你是你幸福的唯一责任人。
You no longer place your hope for happiness on another person. Because you know, you are the sole responsible party for your happiness.

你选择进入一段关系，不是因为“我需要你来完整我”，而是因为“我们在一起，可以共同创造一个更丰盛的世界”。
You choose to enter a relationship not because “I need you to complete me,” but because “together, we can create a richer world.”

你的关系，不再是“索取”和“依赖”，而是“分享”和“成就”。
Your relationship is no longer “索取” and “依赖,” but “分享” and “成就.”

甚至，你看待健康的方式也变了。
Even, the way you view health has changed.

你不会等到生病了，才把自己的身体，完全交给医生。
You won’t wait until you’re sick to completely hand over your body to doctors.

你开始主动地去了解，我吃的每一口食物，会对我的身体产生什么影响？我做的每一次运动，会给我的细胞带来什么改变？
You start to proactively understand what each bite of food you eat will do to your body and what each exercise you do will bring to your cells?

你的身体，不再是一个被动使用的工具，而是你用心经营的“神殿”。
Your body is no longer a passive tool but a “temple” that you operate with heart.

这种主动掌控，这种为自己生命全然负责的态度，会渗透到你生活的每一个毛孔。
This proactive control, this attitude of taking full responsibility for one’s own life, will permeate every pore of your life.

它会让你整个人，散发出一种沉静而强大的能量场。
It will make your entire being radiate a calm yet powerful energy field.

就像我们前面提到的创业者B，他的话语里，没有一丝虚浮之气。每一个字，都是用行动和结果砸出来的。
Like the entrepreneur B we mentioned earlier, there is not a trace of emptiness in his words. Every word is hammered out with action and results.

这样的人，本身就是一种信誉。
Such people are themselves a form of credibility.

这也是我们创立长青盟的初衷。
This is also the original intention behind establishing the Evergreen Alliance.

我们发现，在源头日记这个平台上，那些做得最好的，走得最远的，无一例外，都是主体性极强的人。
We found that on the Source Diary platform, those who performed the best and went the farthest were, without exception, individuals with extremely strong subjectivity.

他们不会问“平台能不能让我赚钱”，他们会问“我如何利用平台这个工具，去实现我的目标”。
They wouldn’t ask, “Can the platform let me make money,” but rather, “How can I use the platform as a tool to achieve my goals.”

他们不会抱怨“客户太难搞”，他们会琢磨“我如何提供超越客户预期的价值，让他们离不开我”。
They wouldn’t complain, “Customers are too difficult to deal with,” but instead ponder, “How can I provide value that exceeds customer expectations, making them unable to leave me.”

他们把创业，当成自己的一场修行。
They regard entrepreneurship as their own spiritual practice.

而长青盟，就是为这样一群“主动创造者”打造的赋能系统。
And the Evergreen Alliance is an empowerment system designed for this group of “proactive creators.”

我们存在的意义，不是给你一个“保姆式”的托管服务。
Our purpose is not to provide you with a “nanny-like” custody service.

而是给你一套“CEO”的作战装备。
But to equip you with a “CEO” battle kit.

我们只做一件事：赋能每一位会员，成长为持续盈利的超级个体，过上品质健康的生活。
We only do one thing: empower every member to grow into a super individual who achieves sustainable profitability and lives a quality healthy life.

我们教你做自媒体，打造个人IP，是让你拥有主动吸引同频客户的“流量发动机”，彻底告别流量焦虑。
We teach you how to do self-media, build a personal IP, to give you an “engagement engine” that actively attracts like-minded customers, completely say goodbye to traffic anxiety.

我们教你做高价值社群，搭建信任场，是让你拥有将陌生访客转化为铁杆粉丝的“关系转化器”。
We teach you how to create high-value communities, build a trust field, to give you an “relationship converter” that turns strangers into loyal fans.

我们依托源头日记这个平台，教你做私域电商，是让你拥有将信任优雅变现，收获持续复利的“价值管道”。
Leveraging the platform of Yuanquan Diary, we teach you to do private domain e-commerce, to give you a “value pipeline” that elegantly transforms trust into profit and reaps continuous compounding returns.

若你想参与我们这样的事业，链接陈秋本人，可以在评论区加入《长青盟》
If you want to participate in such a cause, connect with Chen Qiu personally, you can join the “Green Alliance” in the comments.

我们给你的，不是一条鱼，也不是一张渔网。
We are giving you not a fish, nor a fishing net.

而是打造渔网的“全套工业体系”。
But rather the entire industrial system to make fishing nets.

你，才是你这家“一人无限公司”的CEO。
You are the CEO of your very own “One-Person Unlimited Company”.

长青盟，是你最坚实的后援总部。
The Evergreen Alliance, your most solid support headquarters.

我们只吸引，那些已经觉醒了“主体性”，决心要把命运牢牢攥在自己手里的同路人。
We attract only those who have awakened their “subjectivity” and are determined to firmly grasp their destiny in their own hands.

如果你还在等待风来，等待别人给你递剧本，等待一个完美的“标准答案”。
If you are still waiting for the wind to come, waiting for someone to give you a script, waiting for a perfect “standard answer.”

那我们不适合你。
Then we are not for you.

但如果你已经决定，要亲自下场，写自己的剧本，做自己命运的导演。
But if you have already decided, to step into the game yourself, to write your own script, and to be the director of your own destiny.

那么，欢迎回家。
Then, welcome home.

人生最好的牌局，不是抓到一手好牌。
The best game in life is not being dealt a good hand.

而是无论你抓到什么牌，你都有信心和能力，把它打好。
But rather, no matter what hand you are dealt, you have the confidence and ability to play it well.

这种信心和能力，就叫“主体性”。
This confidence and ability is called “subjectivity.”

它是一个人身上，最性感的才华，也是命运所能给予的，最高级别的“通行证”。
It is the most attractive talent a person can have, and also the highest level of “passport” that fate can bestow.

从今天起，别再问路在何方。
From today on, stop asking where your path lies.

你，就是方向。
You are the direction.

从今天起，别再等待风来。
From today on, don’t wait for the wind to come.

你，就是风的源头。
You are the source of the wind.

声明：本文来自《陈秋日记》会员专栏
Disclaimer: This article is from the “Chen Qiu Diary” membership column.

如有收获，可在评论区赞赏，进入主页获取《陈秋日记》35万字合集。
If you find it helpful, you can appreciate it in the comments and visit the homepage to get the 350,000-word collection of “Chen Qiu Diary.”

我是陈秋，长青盟创始人、源头日记合伙人、600+创始人的商业顾问
I am Chen Qiu, founder of Evergreen Alliance, partner of Source Diary, and business advisor for 600+ founders.

长青盟，是专为成长型女性打造的终身成长社群。
Evergreen Alliance is a lifelong growth community created specifically for growth-oriented women.

我们不止是一个社群，更是一个深度融合了「私域电商」x「知识付费」x「自媒体赋能」的完整成长生态。
It is not just a community, but a complete growth ecosystem that deeply integrates ‘private domain e-commerce’ x ‘knowledge payment’ x ‘influencer empowerment’.

我们陪伴你，以品质健康生活为基石，以精神富足为内核，最终成长为能够持续盈利的超级个体。
We accompany you, with quality and healthy living as the foundation, spiritual fulfillment as the core, ultimately growing into a super individual capable of sustainable profitability.

心理学博士：请不顾一切地培养这3种爱好 2026-01-11 阅读需要19分钟 上周，跟阿雯在院子里喝茶。
Psychology PhD: Please Cultivate These 3 Hobbies at All Costs 2026-01-11 Reading time: 19 minutes Last week, I had tea with Awen in the yard.

她是我认识的人里，活得最“正确”的一个。
She is the one I know who lives the “most correct” life.

名校毕业，一线大厂P9，年薪是很多人一辈子都赚不到的数字。健身，读书，上各种昂贵的提升课，朋友圈永远光鲜亮丽。
Graduated from a top university, P9 at a first-tier large company, her annual salary is a number that many people can’t earn in a lifetime. Fitness, reading, taking various expensive enhancement courses, her social media is always dazzling.

她就是那种，“别人家的孩子”长大了的样子。
She is the kind of person who grows up to be the “child of others.”

可那天，茶过三巡，她看着池子里的锦鲤，突然问我：
But that day, after three cups of tea, she looked at the koi in the pond and suddenly asked me:

“一凡，你说一个人，把所有事都做对了，为什么还是觉得，自己活得像一具空壳？”
“Yifan, you say a person does everything right, why do they still feel like they’re living like a hollow shell?”

我没说话，给她续上茶。
I didn’t speak, just refilled her tea.

她继续说，声音很轻，像怕惊扰了谁。
She continued, her voice very soft, as if afraid of disturbing someone.

“我每天睁开眼，日程就排满了。晨跑，开会，过方案，谈客户，晚上还要见缝插针地学东西。我像个陀螺，不敢停。因为我知道，一停下来，那种巨大的空虚感，就会把我吞掉。”
“I wake up every day and my schedule is packed. Morning runs, meetings, reviewing plans, talking to clients, and in the evening, I still have to squeeze in time to learn. I’m like a top, not daring to stop. Because I know that if I stop, that immense sense of emptiness will swallow me whole.”

“我去看心理医生，最顶尖的那种。医生说我焦虑，给我开药。可我知道，那不是焦虑，那是一种……一种灵魂失重的感觉。好像我拥有的这一切，都不是我的，我只是一个穿着华丽戏服的演员，在演一个叫‘精英’的角色。戏服一脱，里面什么都没有。”
“I went to see a psychologist, the top-tier kind. The doctor said I was anxious and prescribed medication. But I knew it wasn’t anxiety, it was something else… a sense of soul-lightness. As if everything I had wasn’t really mine, I was just an actor in a fancy costume, playing a role called ‘elite.’ When the costume comes off, there’s nothing inside.”

她端起茶杯，手微微发抖。
She picked up her teacup, her hand trembling slightly.

“你说，我是不是病了？”
“You think, am I sick?”

我看着她，想起了很多年前，我还在读大学时，一位亦师亦友的老孟。
I looked at her, remembering many years ago, when I was still in college, an old mentor and friend named Meng.

老孟是心理学系的教授，博士生导师，一头银发，眼神却像孩子一样清澈。
Lao Meng is a professor in the psychology department, a doctoral supervisor, with silver hair, but his eyes are as clear as a child’s.

有一次，我跟他聊起现代人的精神困境，大家似乎都陷入了一种“拥有越多，越不快乐”的怪圈。
Once, I talked with him about the spiritual struggles of modern people. It seemed that everyone had fallen into a strange loop of “the more you have, the less happy you are.”

老孟当时没直接回答我，他给我讲了个故事。
At that time, Lao Meng didn’t answer me directly. He told me a story.

他说，他带过一个博士生，天资极高，读博期间就发了好几篇顶刊的论文，是系里公认的学术新星。所有人都以为他前途无量。
He said that he had supervised a doctoral student who was exceptionally talented. During his doctoral studies, he published several top-tier journal papers and was recognized as an academic star in the department. Everyone thought he had an unlimited future.

结果，博士毕业后不到三年，这个人彻底废了。
As a result, less than three years after completing his PhD, this person completely fell apart.

不是江郎才尽，也不是遭遇了什么重大打击。
It wasn’t a case of running out of talent, nor did he suffer any major setbacks.

他就是……“燃尽”了。
He simply…… “burned out.”

他对学术失去了所有热情，每天把自己关在家里，靠打游戏和点外卖度日。曾经那个眼里有光的青年，变成了一个眼神空洞的躯壳。
He lost all passion for academia and spent his days shut in his home, surviving on video games and takeout food. The once vibrant young man with bright eyes had become a hollow shell.

老孟说，他去看了那个学生好几次。最后一次，他问那个学生：“你还记得，你有多久，没有做一件，跟任何功利目的都无关，纯粹只是因为‘喜欢’才去做的事了吗？”
Lao Meng said he had visited that student several times. The last time, he asked the student, “Do you remember, how long has it been since you haven’t done anything that has no utilitarian purpose, purely just because you ‘liked’ doing it?”

那个曾经对答如流的天才，沉默了很久，然后像个孩子一样，嚎啕大哭。
The once eloquent genius was silent for a long time, then burst into tears like a child.

老孟那天对我说：“一凡，你要记住。一个人的精神世界，就像一个容器。知识、技能、财富、地位，这些都是往里装的东西。但如果这个容器本身，布满了裂缝，甚至没有一个稳固的底座，那么你装得越多，它漏得越快，碎得也越彻底。”
Lao Meng told me that day, “Yifan, you must remember. A person’s spiritual world is like a container. Knowledge, skills, wealth, status—these are all things you put inside it. But if the container itself is full of cracks, or even lacks a stable base, the more you fill it, the faster it leaks and the more thoroughly it shatters.”

“那怎么才能修复这个容器，给它打一个稳固的底座呢？”我问。
“How can this container be repaired, and given a stable base?” I asked.

老孟笑了，伸出三根手指。
Lao Meng smiled and extended three fingers.

“很简单，请不顾一切地，为自己培养这三种‘无用’的爱好。它们不直接产生KPI，不帮你升职加薪，但它们，是支撑你走完人生这场马拉松的，全部‘心力’所在。”
“It’s simple, please cultivate these three ‘useless’ hobbies for yourself at all costs. They don’t directly generate KPIs, nor do they help you get promoted or earn more, but they are the entire ‘heart and soul’ that support you through life’s marathon.”

我对阿雯，复述了老孟的这番话。
I recounted Lao Meng’s words to Awen.

阿雯愣住了，“爱好？我有很多爱好啊。我滑雪，我潜水，我……”
Awen froze, “Hobbies? I have many hobbies. I ski, I dive, I…”

我摇摇头：“那些是‘社交名片’，是‘人设标签’，不是老孟说的那种爱好。”
I shook my head: “Those are ‘social business cards,’ ‘personality tags,’ not the kind of hobbies old Meng mentioned.”

老孟说的第一种爱好，叫：
The first kind of hobby old Meng mentioned is called:

构建一个精神“结界”。
Building a spiritual “boundary.”

什么意思？
What does it mean?

就是在物理空间和时间里，为自己创造一个“神圣不可侵犯”的领地。
It means creating a “sacred and inviolable” territory for oneself in physical space and time.

在这个领地里，你不是任何人的员工、老板、妻子、母亲、子女。你只是你自己。
In this territory, you are not anyone’s employee, boss, wife, mother, or child. You are just yourself.

这个领地，可能只是阳台上的一个角落，一把椅子。
This territory may just be a corner on a balcony, a chair.

可能只是每天雷打不动的半小时，关掉手机，不跟任何人交流。
Perhaps it’s just a fixed half-hour every day, turning off your phone, not communicating with anyone.

在这片领地里，你做什么不重要。发呆，看一朵云从窗外飘过，听一首没有歌词的纯音乐，甚至只是闭上眼睛，感受自己的呼吸。
In this territory, what you do doesn’t matter. Staring blankly, watching a cloud drift past the window, listening to instrumental music without lyrics, or even just closing your eyes and feeling your own breath.

重要的是，你要像捍卫国土一样，捍卫这片领地。
What’s important is that you must defend this territory as fiercely as you would defend your homeland.

我认识一个做投资的大哥，每天交易额过亿的那种。他跟我说，他能在这个高压行业里干二十年没崩溃，就靠一个习惯。
I know a big shot in the investment world, the kind who handles billions in transactions daily. He told me that the reason he’s been able to thrive in this high-pressure industry for twenty years without breaking down is because of a habit.

每天晚上，不管多晚回到家，他都会在自己的书房里，一个人，安安静静地写半个小时毛笔字。
Every night, no matter how late he came home, he would spend half an hour quietly writing calligraphy in his study, all by himself.

不为练成什么书法大家，也不为陶冶什么情操。
Not for becoming a master of calligraphy, nor for cultivating one’s temperament.

他说：“那就是我的‘结界’。当我的手握住毛笔，闻到墨香的那一刻，整个世界都消失了。没有K线，没有财报，没有投资人的催命电话。只有我和一张宣纸。在那半小时里，我把白天被撕扯得七零八落的自己，重新一点点‘粘’回来。那就是我的充电桩，每天不充这半小时电，第二天我就是一堆废铁。”
He said, “That is my ‘boundary.’ When my hand holds the brush and I smell the ink, the entire world disappears. No K-line charts, no financial reports, no investors’ urgent phone calls. Only me and a sheet of Xuan paper. In that half hour, I piece back together the scattered parts of myself that were torn apart during the day. That is my charging station; if I don’t recharge for half an hour each day, I’m a waste of space the next day.”

你看，这就是“结かい”。
You see, that is ‘kai’ (boundary).

现代社会，是一个“无限链接”的社会。微信、电话、邮件……我们像一个四面八方都插着管子的病人，各种信息、情绪、要求，24小时不间断地往我们身体里灌。
Modern society is a society of “endless connections.” We are like patients with tubes inserted into every direction—receiving endless information, emotions, and demands, 24 hours a day.

我们的精神能量，就在这种无休止的“被链接”中，被消耗殆尽。
Our spiritual energy is exhausted in this endless “connection.”

我们总以为，忙碌是在创造价值。
We always think that being busy is creating value.

但真相是，大部分的忙碌，只是在“被动响应”。
But the truth is, most of the busyness is just “passive response.”

构建一个精神“结界”，本质上，是一场“主动断链”的练习。
Building a spiritual “bARRIER,” essentially, is a practice of “active disconnection.”

是你有意识地，每天从这个疯狂的世界里，“拔掉”自己的插头，哪怕只有一小会儿。
It is you who consciously, every day, “unplug” your plug from this crazy world, even if only for a short while.

在这一小会儿里，你不再是信息的处理器，情绪的垃圾桶，他人期待的满足机。
In this short while, you are no longer the processor of information, the trash can of emotions, or the satisfaction machine for others’ expectations.

你重新成为了你自己能量的主人。
You become the master of your own energy again.

这是一种极其重要的“心理疆域感”。
This is an extremely important “sense of psychological territory.”

一个内心没有疆域的人，就像一个没有城墙的国度，谁都可以长驱直入，任意索取。最终，国库空虚，民不聊生。
A person without boundaries in their heart is like a country without walls, allowing anyone to enter freely and take whatever they desire. Ultimately, the treasury becomes empty, and the people suffer.

而那个每天雷打不动的半小时，那把阳台上的椅子，那半小时的书法，就是你为自己修筑的精神长城。
But that fixed half-hour every day, that chair on the balcony, that half-hour of calligraphy, is the spiritual Great Wall you build for yourself.

它不能帮你赚钱，但它能让你不被赚来的钱异化。
It cannot help you make money, but it can prevent you from being alienated by the money you earn.

它不能帮你获得权力，但它能让你在权力的游戏中，不迷失自己。
It cannot help you gain power, but it can prevent you from losing yourself in the game of power.

它，是你精神容器那个最坚固的“底座”。
It is the most solid “foundation” of your spiritual container.

阿雯听完，若有所思。
Awen listened, thoughtfully.

“我好像有点明白了。我总觉得，只要停下来，就会被别人超越。我害怕那种失控感。”
“I think I’m starting to understand. I always feel that if I stop, I’ll be surpassed by others. I’m afraid of that sense of losing control.”

我说：“真正的失控，不是你跑得不够快，而是你跑着跑着，发现‘驾驶舱’里，已经没有‘你’了。”
I said, “True loss of control isn’t that you run slow enough, but that while you’re running, you realize that there’s no ‘you’ left in the ‘cockpit.’”

这引出了老孟说的第二种爱好：
This leads to the second hobby that Lao Meng mentioned:

练习“无我”的观察。
Practicing “no-self” observation.

这话说得有点玄。
This sounds a bit mystical.

我给阿雯举了个例子。
I gave A Wen an example.

我院子里的池塘，养了几尾锦鲤。我每天写作累了，就会去池边坐一会儿。
The pond in my garden has several koi fish. When I get tired from writing, I often sit by the pond for a while.

刚开始，我看鱼，脑子里想的是：
At first, when I watched the fish, I thought to myself:

“这鱼真好看，红白相间，游起来真优雅。养这么几条鱼，显得我多有生活情趣啊。要是客户来了看到，肯定觉得我不俗。哎，这水是不是该换了？鱼食是不是该买了？养鱼还挺麻烦的……”
“These fish are so beautiful, with red and white patterns, swimming so gracefully. Keeping a few fish like this really shows my sense of life’s aesthetics. If clients came to see them, they would definitely think I’m not ordinary. Oh, should I change the water? Should I buy more fish food? Keeping fish is quite troublesome…”

你看，我虽然在“看鱼”，但我看的，全都是“我”。
You see, although I am “watching fish,” what I see is all “me.”

是“我”的感受，“我”的形象，“我”的烦恼。
It is “my” feelings, “my” image, “my” troubles.

鱼，只是一个投射我念头的“幕布”。
The fish is just a “screen” that projects my thoughts.

后来，我试着换一种方式。
Later, I tried a different approach.

我只是看。
I am just watching.

看那条叫“大福”的锦鲤，是如何摆动它的尾鳍，如何在水中转弯。
Watching that koi fish named “Da Fu” as it moves its tail fin, how it turns in the water.

看它的嘴巴，如何一张一合，吞吐着水流。
Watching its mouth as it opens and closes, taking in and expelling the water flow.

看阳光穿过水面，在它鳞片上留下的光斑，是如何随着它的游动而变幻的。
Watching the sunlight pass through the water, the light spots left on its scales, how they change as it swims.

那一刻，我的世界里，没有“我”，只有“鱼”。
At that moment, in my world, there was no “me,” only “the fish.”

我所有的注意力，都聚焦在了这个“他者”身上。
All my attention was focused on this “other.”

那一刻，我体会到了一种前所未有的“宁静”。
At that moment, I experienced a “tranquility” unlike anything before.

就像一台高速运转的电脑，突然进入了屏保模式。CPU不热了，风扇不响了，世界安静了。
Like a high-speed running computer suddenly entering screen saver mode. The CPU stopped getting hot, the fan stopped making noise, and the world became quiet.

老孟说，这就是“无我”的观察。
Lao Meng said, this is the observation of “no self.”

我们现代人，痛苦的根源之一，就是“自我”太重了。
One of the sources of pain for modern people is that their “self” is too heavy.

我们无时无刻不在关注自己。
We are always focused on ourselves.

我今天说的话得不得体？我这个方案老板满不满意？别人会怎么看我？我离升职加装还有多远？我的皱纹是不是又多了一条？
Is what I say today appropriate? Will my boss be satisfied with this plan? How will others see me? How far am I from getting a promotion and a raise? Have I gotten another wrinkle?

我们的意识，像一个永远向内窥探的摄像头，24小时监控着自己的一举一动，然后在大脑里反复回放，打分，评判。
Our consciousness is like a camera that is always peering inward, monitoring our every move for 24 hours, then replaying it in our minds, grading, and judging.

心，怎么可能不累？
How could the heart not be tired?

而“无我”的观察，就是把这个向内的摄像头，调转180度，让它向外。
And the observation of “no self” is to turn this inward-facing camera 180 degrees, making it face outward.

去观察一片叶子的脉络。
To observe the veins of a leaf.

去观察一只蚂蚁如何搬运食物。
Observe how an ant carries food.

去观察一个陌生人，在地铁上看书时，眉头舒展的瞬间。
Observe a stranger, with relaxed brows, reading on the subway.

去观察一碗白米饭，每一粒米，在口腔里被咀嚼时，释放出的那一丝丝甜味。
Observe a bowl of white rice, each grain releasing a faint sweetness in the mouth as it is chewed.

这种观察，有一个核心要诀：
This observation has a core secret:

不判断，不分析，不联想。
Without judgment, without analysis, without association.

只是“看见”。
Just “seeing.”

就像一面镜子，如实地映照万物，但镜子本身，不发表任何意见。
Like a mirror, it faithfully reflects all things, but the mirror itself expresses no opinions.

这是一种强大的“精神解毒剂”。
It is a powerful “spiritual antidote.”

它能把你从“自我”的牢笼里，暂时释放出来。让你从对过去的悔恨、对未来的焦虑、对自我的苛责中，抽离出来。
It can temporarily free you from the cage of the “self,” allowing you to detach from regret for the past, anxiety about the future, and self-criticism.

你投入地去观察一朵花时，你就变成了那朵花。你就不再是那个焦虑的，疲惫的，背负着KPI的你了。
When you immerse yourself in observing a flower, you become that flower. You are no longer the anxious, tired you burdened with KPIs.

你的“自我”，在那一刻，被短暂地“格式化”了。
Your “self” is momentarily “formatted” at that moment.

这同样是一种不直接产生价值的“无用”之事。
This is also a “useless” activity that doesn’t directly produce value.

但它能帮你清空精神内存，修复过载的CPU。
But it can help clear your mental memory and repair an overloaded CPU.

一个懂得如何“清空”自己的人，才能有空间，去容纳新的东西。
A person who knows how to “empty” themselves can make space to accommodate new things.

就像一个杯子，你得先把里面的陈茶倒掉，才能装入新的泉水。
Like a cup, you must first pour out the old tea inside to fill it with fresh spring water.

这种“无我”的观察力，训练久了，会内化成一种能力。
This “selfless” observation skill, when practiced for a long time, internalizes into a kind of ability.

当你在会议上，被老板无理指责时，你能够瞬间抽离出来，像一个旁观者一样，观察他的面部表情，他的语调，他背后可能隐藏的压力和恐惧。你不再轻易地被他的情绪卷进去，你只是在“观察”一个正在发生的“现象”。
When you are at a meeting and unjustly criticized by your boss, you can instantly detach yourself, observing his facial expressions, tone, and the potential pressure and fear he might be hiding behind. You are no longer easily swept away by his emotions; you are merely “observing” an ongoing “phenomenon.”

当你的孩子哭闹不止时，你能跳出“烦躁的母亲”这个角色，去观察他小脸涨红的样子，观察他声音里的委屈和无助。
When your child is crying incessantly, you can step out of the “frustrated mother” role and observe his flushed face, observe the grievances and helplessness in his voice.

那一刻，你的情绪，就有了“刹车”。
At that moment, your emotions have a “brake.”

你看，一个看似“无用”的爱好，最终，却能赋予你，在最混乱的现实中，保持清醒和稳定的“定力”。
You see, an apparently “useless” hobby can ultimately give you, in the most chaotic reality, the “steadfastness” to maintain clarity and stability.

它，是你精神容器那道，防止外物侵扰的“坚壁”。
It is the “solid wall” that prevents external disturbances from entering your spiritual container.

阿雯给我续上茶，长长地舒了一口气。
Awen refilled the tea for me, and sighed deeply.

“我明白了。我的爱好，滑雪，潜水，都是在追求一种更强烈的‘自我’感受。征服雪山的‘我’，探索海底的‘我’。到头来，‘我’这个包袱，反而更重了。”
“I understand. My hobbies, skiing, diving, are all about pursuing a stronger ‘sense of self’. The ‘me’ that conquers the snow-capped mountains, the ‘me’ that explores the depths of the sea. In the end, the burden of ‘me’ has become even heavier.”

“所以，需要第三种爱好，来平衡一下。”我说。
“So, we need a third hobby to balance things out,” I said.

老孟说的第三种爱好，叫：
The third hobby that Old Meng mentioned is called:

用双手创造“序”。
Create “Sequence” with both hands.

“序”，就是秩序。
“Sequence” is order.

我们的精神世界，之所以会混乱，很多时候，是因为我们对生活，失去了“掌控感”。
Our spiritual world becomes chaotic often because we have lost the “sense of control” over our lives.

工作是失控的。一个项目接着一个项目，永远有解决不完的问题。
Work is out of control. Project after project, there are always unresolved issues.

人际关系是失控的。你永远不知道别人下一秒会想什么，会做什么。
Interpersonal relationships are out of control. You never know what others will think or do in the next second.

未来是失控的。时代的一粒灰，落在个人头上，就是一座山。
The future is out of control. A speck of dust from the times falls on an individual, and it becomes a mountain.

这种巨大的“失控感”，就是混乱和焦虑的来源。
This immense “sense of losing control” is the source of chaos and anxiety.

而用双手，去做一件有明确的“输入”和“输出”的事，去创造一种“秩序”，是重建“掌控感”最简单，也最有效的方式。
And using your hands to do something with clear “input” and “output,” to create a “sense of order,” is the simplest and most effective way to rebuild a “sense of control.”

比如，做一顿饭。
For example, cooking a meal.

食材的采购，是输入。
The procurement of ingredients is the input.

洗，切，搭配，烹饪，这是你完全可以掌控的过程。
Washing, cutting, combining, cooking – this is a process you can fully control.

一盘色香味俱全的菜，是输出。
A dish that is visually appealing, fragrant, and flavorful is the output.

这个过程，是完整的，闭环的，结果是可预期的。
This process is complete, closed-loop, and the results are predictable.

当你把一堆杂乱的食材，通过你的双手，变成一道井井有条的美味时，你内在的混乱，也仿佛被梳理了一遍。
When you take a pile of messy ingredients and, through your hands, transform them into a well-organized delicious dish, the inner chaos within you also seems to be sorted out.

那种“我能创造美好”的掌控感，会极大地抚慰你被现实蹂躏得千疮百孔的心。
That sense of “I can create beauty” will greatly soothe your heart that has been trampled by reality.

再比如，整理一个书架。
For example, organizing a bookshelf.

把所有的书都拿下来，分类，擦拭灰尘，再按照你的逻辑，重新排列组合。
Take down all the books, categorize them, wipe off the dust, and then rearrange them according to your logic.

这个过程，就是把“无序”变为“有序”的过程。
This process is the process of turning “disorder” into “order.”

当你的书架变得清爽有序时，你大脑里的“知识系统”，似乎也变得清晰了。
When your bookshelf becomes clean and orderly, your “knowledge system” in your brain seems to become clearer as well.

种一盆花，打扫一个房间，织一件毛衣，拼一个复杂的乐高模型……
Plant a pot of flowers, clean a room, knit a sweater, assemble a complex LEGO model…

所有这些，都属于“用双手创造序”的范畴。
All of these fall under the category of “Creating Order with Two Hands.”

它们有一个共同点：
They have one common point:

它们需要你投入“专注”和“耐心”。
They require you to invest “focus” and “patience.”

它们能给你即时、正向的“反馈”。
They can give you immediate, positive “feedback.”

它们的结果，是“可见”的，能给你带来实在的“成就感”。
Their results are “visible,” bringing you tangible “sense of achievement.”

这和你在工作里，做一个周期漫长，结果未知的项目，体验是完全不同的。
This is completely different from the experience of working on a long-term project with unknown outcomes.

在工作里，你的努力，往往看不见，摸不着，甚至不被承认。
In work, your efforts are often invisible, intangible, and even unrecognized.

但在这些“爱好”里，你付出的每一分心血，都会在那个实体上，留下痕迹。
But in these “hobbies,” every bit of heart you put into them leaves a mark on the tangible object.

那盘菜的温度，那个书架的整洁，那盆花新发的嫩芽，就是对你最好的“奖赏”。
The temperature of that dish, the neatness of that bookshelf, the new sprouts of that plant, are the best “rewards” for you.

这种来自“双手”的踏实感，是任何虚拟世界的成就，都无法替代的。
This sense of stability that comes from “two hands” is something no achievement in any virtual world can replace.

它能把你从云端，拉回到地面。
It can pull you back from the clouds to the ground.

让你重新确认：“我是有能力的，我是可以掌控一些事情的，我是可以创造价值的。”
Making you reaffirm: “I am capable, I can control some things, I can create value.”

这种确认，就是对抗“失重感”和“空虚感”的“船锚”。
This confirmation is the “anchor” against the “sense of weightlessness” and “sense of emptiness.”

它，是你精神容器里，那些让你感到“充实”和“富足”的“定风珠”。
It is the “wind-stabilizing pearls” in your spiritual container that make you feel “fulfilled” and “abundant.”

说到这里，我想起我梳理自己知识体系的过程。
Speaking of this, I remember the process of organizing my knowledge system.

这些年我一直在做这件事，就是把我从古今中外的经典里，从我行走大地的见闻里，从无数次的与人交谈的感悟里，提炼、萃取出的50个思维模型，最终写了一部30万字的电子书，分为5大模块，50个章节，取名为《格物心法》，你可以在主页简介找到订阅入口。
For years, I have been working on this project, which is to distill and extract 50 thinking models from the classics of ancient and modern China and the world, from my observations while traveling, and from countless insights gained from conversations with people. In the end, I wrote an e-book with 300,000 words, divided into 5 major modules and 50 chapters, titled “The Art of Inquiry.” You can find the subscription link in the homepage introduction.

比如，前面说的精神“结界”，对抗的是无处不在的“熵增定律”——万物若无外力维持，必将从有序走向混乱。而“结界”就是那个维持内心秩序的“负熵流”。
For example, the aforementioned spiritual “boundary” opposes the ubiquitous “second law of thermodynamics”—if there is no external force to maintain it, all things will inevitably move from order to chaos. The “boundary” is the “negative entropy flow” that maintains inner order.

再比如，“无我”的观察，是在实践一种“控制二分法”——清晰地分清哪些是我能控制的（我的念头），哪些是我不能控制的（外部世界），然后把能量聚焦于前者。
For instance, the “observing without self,” is practicing a “control dichotomy”—clearly distinguishing what I can control (my thoughts) from what I cannot control (the external world), and then focusing my energy on the former.

而“用双手创造序”，则是“反馈循环”的最佳应用。你付出行动，得到正向反馈（美味的菜，整洁的房间），这个反馈又激励你继续行动，形成一个良性的“增强回路”。
And “creating order with hands” is the best application of “feedback loops.” You take action, receive positive feedback (delicious food, a tidy room), and this feedback motivates you to continue acting, forming a virtuous “reinforcement loop.”

这个过程，就像整理一个巨大的书架。
This process is like organizing a huge bookshelf.

我把心理学、脑科学、社会学这些西方的“工具”，和我从小耳濡目染的易经、道家这些东方的“智慧”，进行分类，编码，然后找到它们底层的连接，把它们安放在合适的“架子”上。
I categorize and encode Western “tools” like psychology, neuroscience, and sociology, along with the Eastern “wisdom” I grew up surrounded by, such as the I Ching and Taoism, then find their underlying connections and place them on the right “shelves.”

最终，我整理出了50个，我认为对于一个现代人来说，最重要，最底层的思维模型。
Ultimately, I’ve organized 50, which I believe are the most important and fundamental thinking models for a modern person.

每一个模型，都是一把钥匙，能帮你打开一扇通往事物本质的门。
Each model is a key that can help you open a door to the essence of things.

当我把这50个模型，按照“清扫心智”、“优化决策”、“洞察系统”、“驾驭不确定性”、“活出通透人生”这五个阶梯，整理成一本名为《格物心法》的电子书时，我体验到了前所未有的“掌控感”和“秩序感”。
When I organized these 50 models into an e-book named 《格物心法》 according to the five steps of “Purifying the Mind,” “Optimizing Decisions,” “Insight into Systems,” “Mastering Uncertainty,” and “Living a 通透 Life,” I experienced an unprecedented sense of “control” and “order.”

我脑子里的“瓦砾”，终于被建成了“宫殿”。
The “rubble” in my mind was finally transformed into a “palace.”

那一刻我才明白，所谓成长，不是你知道得越来越多，而是你的内在世界，变得越来越有序，越来越自洽。
At that moment, I realized that growth is not about knowing more, but about your inner world becoming increasingly ordered and self-consistent.

这50个思维模型，就是我“用双手创造序”的产物，也是我为自己的精神世界，画出的一份最清晰的“地图”。
These 50 thinking models are the product of my “creating order with both hands” and also the clearest “map” I have drawn for my spiritual world.

……

故事讲完了，阿雯的茶也凉了。
The story was over, and Awen’s tea had cooled.

她沉默了很久，然后抬起头，眼睛里，重新有了一点光。
She was silent for a long time, then lifted her head, her eyes regaining a little light.

她说：“一凡，我好像知道我的病根在哪了。我一直在‘做事’，却从来没有‘养心’。我一直在‘建设’我的外部世界，却任由我的内心，长成了一片荒草地。”
She said, “Yifan, I think I know where the root of my illness lies. I have been ‘doing things’ but never ‘nurturing my heart.’ I have been ‘building’ my external world, yet allowing my inner self to grow into a wasteland.”

我笑了笑，是啊。
I smiled, yes.

我们这一代人，从小被教育要“有用”，要“努力”，要成为“人上人”。
Our generation, since childhood, has been taught to be “useful,” to “strive,” to become “superior.”

我们学会了如何管理项目，如何管理团队，如何管理财富。
We learned how to manage projects, how to manage teams, how to manage wealth.

却独独忘了，去学如何管理自己那颗，独一无二的，会疲惫，会迷茫，会痛苦的，心。
But we forgot to learn how to manage that one-of-a-kind heart of ours, the one that can get tired, confused, and hurt.

构建一个精神“结界”，是给你疲惫的心，一个可以安然栖息的“家”。
Construct a spiritual “boundary,” it is a “home” where your tired heart can rest peacefully.

练习“无我”的观察，是给你迷茫的心，一扇可以望向世界的“窗”。
Practice the observation of “no self,” it is a “window” through which your confused heart can gaze at the world.

用双手创造“序”，是给你痛苦的心，一剂可以自我疗愈的“药”。
To create “order” with both hands is a “medicine” that can heal your suffering heart.

这三件事，看似无用。
These three things, seem useless.

但它们，决定了你人生的“底色”。
But they, determine the “base color” of your life.

决定了当风暴来临时，你是一棵被连根拔起的树，还是一座，在风雨中，岿然不动的山。
They determine when the storm comes, whether you are a tree uprooted or a mountain that remains steadfast in the wind and rain.

从今天起，去找到属于你的那个“结界”，那面“镜子”，那双“手”吧。
Starting from today, go find your own “boundary,” that “mirror,” those “hands.”

那才是，比所有世俗成功加起来，都更重要的事情。
That is something far more important than all worldly success combined.

那才是，你能给自己，这一生最好的，奢侈品。
That is the best luxury you can give yourself in this lifetime.

声明：本文来自《一凡日记》专栏
Statement: This article is from the column “Yifan Diary”

文章时常被删屏蔽，如有收获，可在评论区获取本篇《一凡日记》5000字PDF版
The article is often deleted or censored. If you gain something, you can get the 5000-word PDF version of this “Yifan Diary” in the comments.

我是一凡，长青盟创始人、源头日记合伙人
I am Wei Fan, founder of the Evergreen Alliance and partner of Source Diary.

长青盟，是专为成长型女性打造的终身成长社群。
Evergreen Alliance is a lifelong growth community created specifically for growth-oriented women.

我们不止是一个社群，更是一个深度融合了「私域电商」x「知识付费」x「自媒体赋能」的完整成长生态。
It is not just a community, but a complete growth ecosystem that deeply integrates ‘private domain e-commerce’ x ‘knowledge payment’ x ‘influencer empowerment’.

我们陪伴你，以品质健康生活为基石，以精神富足为内核，最终成长为能够持续盈利的超级个体。
We accompany you, with quality and healthy living as the foundation, spiritual fulfillment as the core, ultimately growing into a super individual capable of sustainable profitability.

子弹为什么飞不起来了 2025-12-19 阅读需要20分钟 想象一下，一个曾经天天排队、门口停满豪车的顶级饭店，突然有一天，变得门可罗雀。
Why have the bullets stopped flying 2025-12-19 Reading time: 20 minutes Imagine a top-tier restaurant that used to have long queues and was always full of luxury cars, suddenly one day, it became deserted.

服务员比客人还多，站在门口玩手机。
There are more waiters than customers, standing at the door playing with their phones.

后厨曾经颠勺如飞的大师傅，现在正蹲在后门抽烟，一脸的生无可恋。
The once skillful chef in the back kitchen, now squatting at the back door smoking, with a look of utter despair.

你路过，觉得很奇怪。 是菜不好吃了吗？
You passed by and found it strange. Is the food not tasty anymore?

你进去尝了尝，发现菜还是那个菜，甚至摆盘更精致了，用的餐具也更贵了。 但就是感觉，味道不对了。
You went in to try it and found that the food was still the same, even the presentation was more exquisite, and the utensils used were more expensive. But it just felt like something was off.

缺了点什么。 缺了点“锅气”。
Something was missing. It was missing that “wok hei.”

缺了那种只有大师傅炒嗨了，不计成本地往里甩好料，火光冲天，才能烧出来的人间烟火味。
It was missing that human touch of everyday life flavor that could only be cooked out when the master chef was in full swing, throwing in premium ingredients without regard for cost, with flames shooting up.

现在的菜，吃起来就像是中央厨房用料理包做出来的，精准，标准，安全，但就是没有灵魂。
The food now tastes like it’s made from meal kits in a central kitchen—precise, standardized, and safe, but it lacks soul.

你问老板，怎么回事？ 老板叹了口气，指了指墙上新挂的一幅画。
You ask the owner, what’s going on? The owner sighs and points to a newly hung painting on the wall.

画上不是什么山水名家，而是一个穿着西装，戴着金丝眼镜，手里拿着计算器和一叠报表的男人。
The painting isn’t of famous landscape artists, but of a man in a suit, wearing gold-rimmed glasses, holding a calculator and a stack of reports.

老板说，饭店换东家了。 以前的老板，是个吃货。 他开饭店，一半是为了赚钱，一半是为了自己那张嘴。
The owner says, the restaurant has changed hands. The previous owner was a foodie. He opened the restaurant half for profit and half for his own taste buds.

他会为了找到最好的笋，亲自跑到山里跟笋农住半个月。 他会因为大师傅研发出一道新菜，高兴得免掉所有客人当天的单。
He would personally go into the mountains and stay with the bamboo shoot farmers for half a month to find the best bamboo shoots. He would be so happy when the master chef developed a new dish that he would waive the orders of all customers that day.

他懂吃，也尊重做菜的人。 所以，大师傅们敢在他手底下玩花活。 今天试试加点这个，明天试试换种火候。
He knows how to eat and respects those who cook. That’s why the master chefs dare to experiment under his guidance. Today they might try adding a bit of this, and tomorrow they might try a different cooking method.

经常有失败的，直接倒掉，老板也不骂，笑呵呵地说，没事，再来。 因为他知道，惊艳舌尖的美味，就是在无数次失败的边角料里，偶然诞生的。
There are often failures, which are simply discarded. The boss doesn’t scold, but instead smiles and says, It’s okay, let’s try again. Because he knows that the stunning taste of food is born from the accidental discovery among countless failed side ingredients.

但现在的新东家，不懂吃。 他以前是搞金融的，是玩数字的。 在他眼里，饭店不是一个创造美味的地方，而是一个“餐饮消费场景下的资产增值模型”。
But his new owner doesn’t understand eating. He used to work in finance, dealing with numbers. In his eyes, a restaurant is not a place to create delicious food, but an “asset appreciation model in the context of food and beverage consumption.”

他看不懂大师傅的手艺，他只看得懂报表。 报表告诉他，笋的采购成本太高，利润率低，换成冷冻的。
He couldn’t understand the master’s craftsmanship, but he could understand the reports. The reports told him that the procurement cost of bamboo shoots was too high and the profit margin was low, so he should switch to frozen ones.

报表告诉他，研发新菜的失败率是90%，属于“高风险投资”，停掉。
The reports told him that the failure rate of developing new dishes was 90%, which was considered a “high-risk investment,” so he should stop it.

报表告诉他，过去一年，卖得最好的是“红烧肉盖饭”，因为便宜、管饱、出餐快。
The reports told him that in the past year, the best-selling dish was “Braised Pork Over Rice” because it was cheap, filling, and quick to prepare.

于是，新东家下了命令。
So, the new owner gave the order.

从今天起，饭店菜单砍掉80%。 只保留红烧肉盖饭，以及其他几样被数据验证过“最受欢迎”的菜。
Starting today, the restaurant menu will be cut by 80%. Only keep Braised Pork with Rice, as well as a few other dishes verified by data as “most popular”.

所有菜品，全部标准化。 肉必须是哪个牌子的冷鲜肉，切多厚，有标准。
All dishes must be standardized. The meat must be a specific brand of chilled meat, with a standard thickness.

酱油必须放几克，糖必须放几克，水必须加多少毫升，有标准。 炖煮的时间，必须精确到秒。
Must use a certain number of grams of soy sauce, a certain number of grams of sugar, and add a specific number of milliliters of water, all with standards. The stewing time must be precise to the second.

大师傅们被剥夺了所有自由发挥的权力，变成了流水线上的操作工。 他们的任务，不再是“创造美味”，而是“精准复制”。
The master chefs have been stripped of all freedom to improvise and have become assembly line operators. Their task is no longer “to create delicious food,” but “to accurately replicate.”

新东家还搞了个“大数据分析系统”。
The new owner also set up a “big data analysis system.”

他发现，来看电影的，哦不，来吃饭的客人里，年轻人居多。 年轻人喜欢什么？ 喜欢拍照，喜欢发朋友圈。
He noticed that the customers, oh no, the diners who came for meals were mostly young people. What do young people like? They like taking photos and posting on social media.

于是，他要求，所有的菜，摆盘必须好看。 味道可以其次，但卖相一定要“出片”。
So, he demanded that all the dishes must be beautifully presented. Taste could come second, but the appearance had to be “photogenic.”

他还发现，年轻人喜欢“联名”。 于是，他花大价钱，跟各种热门动漫、游戏搞联名，推出“XX限定套餐”。
He also found that young people liked “collaborations.” So, he spent a lot of money collaborating with various popular anime and games, launching “XX Limited Edition Sets.”

味道还是一样，就是换个包装，加个小玩具，价格翻三倍。 一开始，这套打法确实管用。
The taste is still the same, just changed the packaging, added a small toy, and the price tripled. At first, this strategy actually worked.

靠着新奇的包装和营销，饭店的流水“噌噌”往上涨。 新东家很高兴，在股东大会上，指着PPT上的曲线，宣布自己的“数字化赋能餐饮”取得了巨大成功。
Relying on the novelty of the packaging and marketing, the restaurant’s revenue soared. The new owner was delighted and, at the shareholders’ meeting, pointed to the curve on the PowerPoint slide, announcing that his “digital empowerment of the catering industry” had achieved great success.

但好景不长。 食客们不是傻子。 第一次来，觉得新鲜，拍拍照，发个朋友圈，满足了社交需求。
But the good times didn’t last long. Customers aren’t fools. The first time they come, they find it fresh, take some photos, and post on WeChat Moments, satisfying their social needs.

第二次来，就觉得有点腻了。 第三次，他们就不来了。 因为他们来饭店，最根本的需求，是“吃一顿好的”。
The second time they come, they start to feel a bit bored. By the third time, they don’t come anymore. Because their most fundamental need when they visit a restaurant is “to have a good meal.”

而不是来吃一个“长得像菜的营销物料”。 当饭店的核心，从“菜”变成了“营销”，从“厨师”变成了“产品经理”，从“味道”变成了“数据”。
Instead of coming to eat a “marketing material that looks like vegetables.” When the core of the restaurant has changed from “food” to “marketing,” from “chef” to “product manager,” and from “taste” to “data.”

这家饭店的灵魂，就死了。 它不再是一个饭店，它只是一个挂着饭店招牌的金融产品。
The soul of this restaurant has died. It is no longer a restaurant; it is just a financial product hanging with a restaurant sign.

它的目的，不再是为食客提供美味，而是为资本提供回报。 当食客们发现，花100块钱，在这里只能吃到一份味道平平的料理包，而在隔壁小馆子，花30块钱，能吃到一份锅气十足的现炒小菜时。
Its purpose is no longer to provide delicious food for diners, but to provide returns for capital. When diners realize that spending 100 yuan here can only get a bland packaged dish, while next door for 30 yuan, they can enjoy a freshly stir-fried small dish with a rich pot aroma.

他们用脚投了票。
They voted with their feet.

于是，这家曾经的顶级饭店，就这么凉了。 老板，也就是那个新东家，百思不得其解。
So, this once top-tier restaurant, just like that, went bankrupt. The owner, also the new owner, couldn’t figure it out.

他明明做的每一步，都是“对”的。 都是经过数据分析，市场调研，精准计算的。
He had clearly done every step “right.” It was all based on data analysis, market research, and precise calculations.

他把所有“不确定”的因素，比如厨师的灵感，食材的天然差异，都剔除掉了。
He had eliminated all “uncertain” factors, such as the chef’s inspiration and the natural variations in ingredients.

他建立了一个完美的、可控的、高效的商业机器。 为什么，这台机器，突然就熄火了呢？ 他想不通。
He had built a perfect, controllable, and efficient business machine. Why, then, did this machine suddenly shut down? He couldn’t understand it.

因为一个用计算器思考的人，永远理解不了，人，是需要“惊喜”的。 而惊喜，恰恰诞生于那些“不确定”之中。
Because a person who thinks with a calculator will never understand that humans need “surprises.” And surprises are precisely born from those “uncertainties.”

好了，饭店的故事讲完了。 现在，我们把“饭店”换成“电影院”。 把“食客”换成“观众”。
Alright, the story of the restaurant is over. Now, let’s replace “restaurant” with “movie theater.” Replace “patrons” with “audiences.”

把“厨师”换成“导演、编剧”。 把“菜”换成“电影”。 把那个只看报表的“新东家”，换成“热钱”和“平台资本”。
Replace “chefs” with “directors and screenwriters.” Replace “dishes” with “movies.” Replace that new owner who only looks at reports with “hot money” and “platform capital.”

你会发现，过去十年，电影行业发生的故事，和这家饭店，一模一样。 曾经的电影行业，虽然也是一门生意，但至少，那个“开饭店的老板”，还懂点“吃”。
You’ll find that the stories that have happened in the film industry over the past decade are exactly the same as this restaurant. The film industry, though also a business, at least the “owner of the restaurant” still understood a bit about “eating.”

那时候的资本，我们称之为“产业资本”。 他们可能是一个煤老板，一个房地产商。
The capital of that time, we call it “industrial capital.” They could be a coal tycoon or a real estate developer.

他们投电影，赚钱当然是主要目的，但或多或少，还带点别的东西。 比如，情怀。 比如，想跟某个大明星吃顿饭。 比如，想捧红自己的女朋友。
They invest in movies, and of course, making money is the primary goal, but more or less, they also bring something else along. For example, sentiment. For example, wanting to have a meal with a big star. For example, wanting to launch their girlfriend into the spotlight.

比如，单纯觉得这个导演牛逼，这个故事带劲，赔钱也认了，就当交个朋友。
For example, simply feeling that the director is awesome, the story is compelling, and they’re willing to accept a loss, seeing it as making a new friend.

这种资本，是“人”的资本。 它有情绪，有偏好，有不理性的地方。 正因为它的“不理性”，才给了那些有才华但没名气的“厨师”机会。
This kind of capital is “human” capital. It has emotions, preferences, and irrational aspects. It is precisely because of its “irrationality” that it gives opportunities to those talented but lesser-known “chefs.”

姜文拍《让子弹飞》，据说拉投资的时候，就是把几个老板关在屋里，天天给他们讲故事，讲得眉飞色舞，老板们听嗨了，脑子一热，钱就投了。
Jiang Wen filmed “Let the Bullets Fly,” and it is said that when he was raising investment, he locked a few bosses in a room and told them stories every day, animatedly, until the bosses got carried away and invested impulsively.

他们没看什么数据报表，没做什么市场调研。 就是单纯觉得，这事儿，带劲，好玩。
They didn’t look at any data reports or conduct market research. They simply felt that this was exciting and fun.

于是，一部神作诞生了。 那时候的导演，权力很大。 就像饭店里的大师傅，老板充分信任，给你足够的空间去“玩”。
So, a masterpiece was born. At that time, the director had a lot of power. Like a chef in a restaurant, the boss fully trusted them and gave them enough space to “play.”

冯小刚可以拍《一九四二》，张艺谋可以拍《金陵十三钗》。 这些电影，从商业上看，风险极高。
Feng Xiaogang could film “1942,” and Zhang Yimou could film “The Flowers of War.” These films, from a commercial perspective, were extremely risky.

题材沉重，不讨喜。 但那时候的投资人，敢赌。 那时候的导演，有底气去拍自己真正想拍的东西。
The subject matter is heavy, not pleasing. But back then, the investors dared to take a gamble. Back then, the directors had the confidence to shoot what they truly wanted to shoot.

观众呢？ 观众那时候，是真正的“食客”。 他们去电影院，是抱着一种“寻宝”的心态。
And the audience? Back then, the audience were true “foodies.” They went to the cinema with a mindset of “treasure hunting.”

你不知道今天会看到一部什么样的电影。 可能是一部让你从头笑到尾的喜剧。 也可能是一部让你哭湿三包纸巾的悲剧。
You didn’t know what kind of movie you would see that day. It could be a comedy that made you laugh from start to finish. Or it could be a tragedy that made you cry through three packs of tissues.

还可能是一部让你走出电影院，还半天回不过神来的悬疑片。 这种“不确定性”，正是去电影院最大的魅力。
It could also be a suspense film that left you stunned for half an hour after leaving the cinema. This “uncertainty” is the biggest charm of going to the cinema.

就像开盲盒。 你永远期待着，下一个，会开出什么惊喜。
Just like opening a blind box. You always look forward to what surprise the next one will bring.

但后来，一切都变了。 大概从2015年开始，大量的“热钱”涌入了电影行业。 这些钱，不是煤老板的钱，不是房地产商的-钱。 它们是“金融资本”，是“平台资本”。
But later, everything changed. Around 2015, a large amount of “hot money” flowed into the film industry. This money wasn’t from coal bosses, nor from real estate developers. It was “financial capital” and “platform capital.”

这些资本，背后站着的，是无数个匿名的投资人，是复杂的基金结构，是对赌协议，是季度财报的压力。
These capitals are backed by countless anonymous investors, complex fund structures, put-options, and the pressure of quarterly financial reports.

这些资本，是没有“人格”的。 它冰冷，理性，且极度缺乏耐心。 它不懂电影，也不想懂。 它只认识一个东西：“确定性”。
These capitals have no “personality.” They are cold, rational, and extremely impatient. They don’t understand movies, nor do they want to. They only recognize one thing: “certainty.”

它要的是，投进去一块钱，在可预见的未来，能变成一块五，甚至两块。 任何可能影响这个“确定性”的因素，都必须被消灭。 导演的个人风格？ 不确定。消灭。
It wants to invest one dollar and, in the foreseeable future, turn it into one and a half, or even two. Any factor that could affect this “certainty” must be eliminated. The director’s personal style? Uncertain. Eliminate.

编剧的奇思妙想？ 不确定。消灭。 演员的即兴发挥？ 不确定。消灭。 于是，电影的制作流程，被彻底改造了。
The screenwriter’s whimsical ideas? Uncertain. Eliminate. The actor’s improvisation? Uncertain. Eliminate. Thus, the film production process is completely transformed.

从一个“艺术创作”的过程，变成了一个“工业产品”的生产过程。 就像那个只卖红烧肉盖饭的饭店。
From an “artistic creation” process to a “manufacturing product” process. Like that restaurant that only sells braised pork rice.

第一步，找一个“必胜”的菜谱。 什么是必胜的菜谱？ 就是那些已经被市场反复验证过的东西。
The first step, find a “winning” recipe. What is a winning recipe? It is those things that have been repeatedly verified by the market.

大IP + 流量明星 = 票房保证。
Big IP + Traffic Star = Box Office Guarantee.

这就是那几年，所有资本都信奉的“圣经”。 于是，市面上所有能买的下来的网络小说，都被买光了。
This was the “bible” that all capital believed in for those years. So, all the novels that could be bought in the market were snapped up.

不管写得多么狗血，多么没逻辑，只要它在网上有几千万的点击量，那它就是“优质IP”。
No matter how cliché or illogical it was written, as long as it had tens of millions of clicks online, it was considered a “quality IP.”

然后，再去找当时最火的流量明星。 不管他会不会演戏，台词都念不顺，只要他有几千万的微博粉丝，那他就是“票房灵药”。
Then, find the most popular traffic star at the time. No matter if he could act or not, if his lines were mumbled, as long as he had tens of millions of Weibo followers, he was the “box office miracle worker.”

资本相信，只要把这两个东西捏在一起，粉丝们就会像潮水一样涌进电影院，把钱乖乖交出来。
Capital believes that as long as these two things are combined, fans will flood into the cinema like a tide, obediently handing over their money.

至于电影本身拍得怎么样？ 不重要。 就像那家饭店，菜的味道不重要，只要联名的IP够火，包装够好看，就能骗人进来消费。
As for how well the movie itself is made? It doesn’t matter. Just like that restaurant, the taste of the food isn’t important, as long as the co-branded IP is hot enough and the packaging is attractive enough, it can trick people into spending money.

这套打法，在初期，确实屡试不爽。 一部又一部的烂片，靠着IP和流量，卷走了几十亿的票房。 资本赚得盆满钵满。 他们更加坚信，自己找到了电影的“财富密码”。
This strategy, in the early stages, indeed worked time and time again. One bad movie after another, relying on IP and traffic, stole billions in box office revenue. Capital made a fortune. They became even more convinced that they had found the “wealth code” of movies.

他们开始像养猪一样，批量生产这种“IP+流量”的电影。 他们甚至发明了更高级的玩法。
They began to produce these “IP+traffic” movies in batches, like raising pigs. They even invented more advanced tactics.

比如，一部电影，还没开拍，光是把IP和几个主演的名字放在PPT上，就能拉到好几轮投资，估值炒上天。 电影本身，已经不重要了。
For example, a movie that hasn’t even started filming can raise several rounds of investment and drive its valuation sky-high just by putting the IP and the names of a few lead actors on a PowerPoint slide. The movie itself is no longer important.

它成了一个金融工具，一个在资本市场里用来击鼓传花的“标的物”。 至于最后，那个花落到谁手里，电影上映后会不会亏得底裤都不剩。
It has become a financial instrument, an “object” used in the capital market to pass the buck. As for who ends up holding the flower, whether the movie will lose everything after it’s released, the earliest investors don’t care.

最早入局的资本，根本不关心。
The earliest investors in the game couldn’t care less.

他们早就通过各种资本运作，把钱赚到手，然后离场了。 留下一地鸡毛，和被深深伤害的观众。
They have long made their money through various capital operations and have already left. Leaving behind a mess and deeply hurt audiences.

第二步，把“厨师”变成“操作工”。
Step two, change “chef” to “operator”.

当资本彻底掌控了话语权，导演和编剧的地位，就一落千丈。
When capital completely controls the narrative, the status of directors and screenwriters plummets.

以前，是导演拿着本子找投资。 现在，是资本拿着IP和钱，去找一个“听话”的导演。
Previously, it was the director holding a script to seek investment. Now, it’s capital holding IP and money, looking for a “compliant” director.

这个导演，不需要你有多大的才华，多牛的艺术追求。 只需要你，能把他们的“产品”，按时、按预算、不出差错地生产出来。
This director doesn’t need to have great talent or impressive artistic pursuits. All that’s required is that you can produce their “product” on time, within budget, and without errors.

你就是一个项目经理。 你的工作，就是服务好甲方。 甲方是谁？ 是资本，是平台，是流量明星。
You are a project manager. Your job is to serve the client well. Who is the client? It’s capital, it’s the platform, it’s the traffic star.

一个剧本，在开拍前，要经过无数轮的“审阅”。
A script needs to go through countless rounds of “review” before shooting begins.

投资方要提意见，平台方要提意见，主演的经纪人要提意见，甚至连广告赞助商都要提意见。
Investors need to give feedback, platform representatives need to give feedback, the agent of the lead actor needs to give feedback, and even the advertising sponsors need to give feedback.

这个角色不能这么写，因为会影响我们家艺人的“人设”。
This character cannot be written this way, because it will affect our artist’s “persona.”

那句台-词必须改，因为听起来像在内涵我们的竞争对手。 这里必须加一段戏，因为我们的赞助商，那个卖汽车的，要求主角必须开着他们的车，来一段3分钟的特写。
That line of dialogue must be changed because it sounds like it’s subtly insulting our competitors. A scene must be added here because our sponsor, the car dealer, insists that the protagonist must drive their car, with a 3-minute close-up.

编剧，就成了一个“会议纪要整理员”。 导演，就成了一个“现场调度”。 每个人，都成了这台巨大机器上的一颗螺丝钉。
The screenwriter has become a “meeting minutes secretary.” The director has become a “field coordinator.” Everyone has become a screw in this huge machine.

没有人对最终的“艺术效果”负责。 大家只对自己的“KPI”负责。 投资人要对回报率负责。
No one is responsible for the final “artistic effect.” Everyone is only responsible for their own “KPIs.” Investors are responsible for the return on investment.

平台要对流量负责。 明星要对自己的形象负责。 编剧要对“能不能过审”负责。 导演要对“能不能按时交片”负责。
The platform is responsible for traffic. Celebrities are responsible for their image. Screenwriters are responsible for “whether it can pass censorship.” Directors are responsible for “whether it can be delivered on time.”

你看，每个人都在“尽职尽责”。 但凑在一起，就成了一坨屎。 因为一部好电影，是需要一个“灵魂”的。
Look, everyone is “fulfilling their duties.” But when they come together, it becomes a mess. Because a good movie requires a “soul.”

这个灵魂，就是导演和编-剧的创作意志。 当这个灵魂被抽掉，剩下的，就只是一具行尸走肉。
This soul is the creative will of the director and screenwriter. When this soul is stripped away, what remains is just a walking dead body.

一具用钱、用流量、用数据、用KPI堆砌起来的，精美的行尸走肉。
A beautiful walking dead body built with money, traffic, data, and KPIs.

第三步，用“大数据”喂猪。 平台资本进来后，带来了一个最时髦的词：大数据。
Step three, feed the pigs with “big data.” After the platform capital comes in, it brings along the most trendy term: big data.

他们宣称，可以通过分析观众的观影数据，精准地知道观众想看什么。 然后，“按需生产”。
They claim that by analyzing viewers’ viewing data, they can accurately know what the audience wants to watch. Then, “produce on demand.”

这听起来，是不是特别科学，特别美好？ 但实际上，这是一个最恶毒的陷阱。
Doesn’t this sound particularly scientific and wonderful? But in reality, it is the most vicious trap.

大数据的本质，是“总结过去”，而不是“预测未来”。 它只能告诉你，过去什么东西火过。 它会告诉你，观众喜欢看“屌丝逆袭”，喜欢看“霸道总裁爱上我”，喜欢看“手撕鬼子”。
The essence of big data is “summarizing the past,” not “predicting the future.” It can only tell you what was popular in the past. It will tell you that the audience likes to watch “underdog stories,” “霸道总裁爱上我” (the powerful CEO falls in love with me), and “手撕鬼子” (tearing apart the 鬼).

于是，平台就给你推荐更多同质化的东西。 你点开一个“屌丝逆袭”的短剧，平台就会在接下来的一个月里，给你推送一百个类似的短剧。
So, the platform will recommend more homogeneous content to you. You click on a “underdog story” short drama, and the platform will push a hundred similar short dramas to you in the next month.

你刷到一个“霸道总裁”的片段，算法就会认为，你这辈子就只爱看这个了。
You come across a clip of a “domineering CEO,” and the algorithm assumes you’ll only love watching this for the rest of your life.

它把你困在一个“信息茧房”里，不断地给你喂同一种饲料。 直到你吐为止。 电影行业，也掉进了这个坑里。
It traps you in an “echo chamber,” continuously feeding you the same kind of content until you vomit. The film industry has also fallen into this pit.

资本用大数据分析，发现过去几年，喜剧片和爱情片最卖座。 于是，市场上就充斥着大量的、粗制滥造的喜剧片和爱情片。
Capital uses big data analysis to discover that comedies and romantic films have been the most successful in the past few years. As a result, the market is flooded with a large number of poorly made comedies and romantic films.

他们把那些已经被验证过的“笑点”、“哭点”、“爽点”，像公式一样，排列组合。
They arrange and combine those already proven “laugh lines,” “tear lines,” and “thrill lines” like a formula.

第一十分钟，必须有个小冲突。 第三十分钟，必须有个误会。 第六十分钟，主角必须跌入谷底。 第九十分钟，必须反转，然后大团圆结局。
In the first ten minutes, there must be a small conflict. In the third ten minutes, there must be a misunderstanding. In the sixth ten minutes, the protagonist must fall to the bottom. In the ninth ten minutes, there must be a reversal, then a big happy ending.

所有电影，都长着一张相似的脸。 你看完开头，就能猜到结尾。 你看到一个包袱，就知道它下一个要怎么响。
All movies have a similar face. Once you see the beginning, you can guess the ending. You see a package, and you know how it will sound next.

这不叫“创作”，这叫“填充”。 观众，在这种“精准投喂”下，也逐渐丧失了对好东西的品味能力。
This isn’t called “creation,” it’s called “filling.” Audiences, under this “precise feeding,” gradually lose their ability to appreciate good things.

他们被喂了太多年的“猪食”。 以至于，当一道真正的“佛跳墙”端上来的时候，他们反而吃不惯了。
They’ve been fed “pigs’ food” for too many years. So when a real “Buddha jumps over the wall” is served, they can’t even stomach it.

他们会说，这什么玩意儿？太淡了。 节奏太慢了，看不懂。 还是那个“霸道总裁”有意思，不用动脑子，爽就完了。
They’ll say, what kind of junk is this? It’s too bland. The rhythm is too slow, can’t understand it. It’s still that “domineering CEO” that’s interesting, no need to use your brain, just enjoy it.

这就是最可怕的地方。 资本，不仅控制了“厨房”，还通过算法，控制了“食客的舌头”。
This is the most terrifying part. Capital not only controls the “kitchen,” but also controls the “palates of the diners” through algorithms.

它把所有人的审美，拉到了和它一样低的水平线。 然后，再用它最擅长的、最低成本的“猪食”，来满足这种被它培养出来的、低级的趣味。
It brings everyone’s aesthetic to the same low level as itself. Then, it uses its most skilled, lowest-cost “pig feed” to satisfy the low-level taste it has cultivated.

形成一个完美的商业闭环。 在这个闭环里，资本永赚。 而电影，死了。
Forming a perfect commercial 闭环. In this 闭环, capital always profits. And movies, die.

当一个行业，不再以“创造好作品”为荣，而是以“攒一个高票房的盘子”为荣。
When an industry no longer takes pride in “creating good works,” but instead takes pride in “amassing a high box office revenue.”

当一个导演，不再琢磨怎么讲好一个故事，而是琢磨怎么在PPT里，把自己的项目包装得更吸引投资人。
When a director no longer thinks about how to tell a good story, but instead focuses on how to package their project more attractively for investors in a PowerPoint presentation.

当一个演员，不再钻研演技，而是钻研怎么在社交媒体上，制造话题，维持热度。 当一个观众，走进电影院，不再是为了体验一场梦，而是为了完成一个“社交打卡”的任务。
When an actor no longer cultivates their craft, but instead focuses on how to create buzz on social media and maintain popularity. When an audience walks into a movie theater, no longer to experience a dream, but to complete a “social check-in” task.

这个行业，离完蛋也就不远了。
This industry is not far from being finished.

观众的耐心，是有限的。 你骗他一次，他可能会上当。
The patience of the audience is limited. If you fool them once, they might fall for it.

你骗他十次，他就会把你拉进黑名单。
If you fool them ten times, they will put you on their blacklist.

当观众一次又一次地，被那些挂着“大IP”、“大明星”的烂片，骗进电影院，然后又一次又一次地，带着被喂了一嘴屎的心情走出来。
When audiences are repeatedly tricked into watching bad films that are hyped as “big IP” or “big stars,” and then leave the cinema time and again with a feeling of being utterly disappointed, their trust in the phrase “domestic film” is gradually eroded.

他们对“国产电影”这四个字的信任，就被一点一点地消耗掉了。 直到有一天，这种信任，彻底崩盘。 大家累了，也学精了。
Until one day, this trust completely collapses. Everyone gets tired and learns to be more cautious.

新电影上映，第一反应不再是“买票支持”。 而是“先让别人去踩踩雷”。
The new movie is released, the first reaction is no longer “buy a ticket to support.” Instead, it’s “let others go and experience the disappointment.”

打开豆瓣，看看评分。 刷刷抖音，看看解说。
Open Douban to check the ratings. Scroll through Douyin to watch the reviews.

如果评分不高，口碑不好，那对不起，这钱，我省下来，干点啥不好？ 买杯奶茶，打会儿游戏，不比去电影院受罪强？
If the ratings aren’t high and the word-of-mouth is bad, then sorry, this money, why not save it and do something else? Buy a cup of milk tea, play some games, isn’t that better than suffering in the cinema?

于是，一个恶性循环开始了。 观众越是不信任，电影的票房就越依赖于上映前几天的“粉丝效应”和“大规模营销”。
Thus, a vicious cycle begins. The less the audience trusts, the more the box office relies on “fan effects” and “large-scale marketing” in the days before its release.

这逼得片方，只能把更多的钱，砸在营销上，而不是制作上。 他们必须在观众反应过来之前，尽可能地把票房冲上去。
This forces the filmmakers to spend more money on marketing rather than production. They must maximize box office revenue before the audience catches on.

这又导致，电影的质量，进一步下滑。 质量越差，观众就越不买账。 你看，这个死局，就这么形成了。
This further degrades the quality of the film. The worse the quality, the less the audience responds. Look, this dead end is formed just like this.

而压垮骆驼的最后一根稻草，是什么？ 是短视频。 当电影院提供的“红烧肉盖饭”，已经变得又贵又难吃的时候。
And what is the last straw that breaks the camel’s back? It’s short videos. When the “braised pork rice” offered by cinemas becomes both expensive and unpalatable.

隔壁突然开了一家“小吃摊”。 这个小吃摊，不要钱，菜品还极其丰富。
Suddenly, a “snack stall” opens up next door. This snack stall is free, and the variety of dishes is extremely rich.

三分钟一个反转短剧，五分钟一个世界奇观，十分钟看完一部电影的解说。
A three-minute short drama with a twist, a five-minute world wonder, and a ten-minute movie explanation.

它用更短的时间，更直接的方式，提供了更密集的“爽点”。 观众的口味，被彻底养刁了。
It provides more intense “thrills” in a shorter time and more direct way. The audience’s taste has been completely spoiled.

他们已经习惯了这种“短、平、快”的刺激。 你再让他们花两个小时，安安静静地坐在电影院里，去看一个起承转合都慢吞吞的故事。
They have become accustomed to this “short, flat, fast” stimulation. Then ask them to spend two hours quietly in a movie theater to watch a story that unfolds slowly with a beginning, development, climax, and resolution.

他们坐不住了。 不是观众变了，是时代变了。
They can’t sit still. It’s not the audience that has changed, it’s the era.

那个把看电影当成一种“朝圣”的时代，已经一去不复返了。 电影，从一种“艺术”，一种“社交”，退化成了一种“众多娱乐消费品中的一个选项”。
The era when going to the movies was considered a kind of “pilgrimage” has long gone. Movies, once an “art” and a “social activity,” have degenerated into just “one of many entertainment consumer goods.”

而且，还是性价比越来越低的那一个。 当资本把电影的灵魂抽走，观众也只好用脚投票，去寻找新的灵魂寄托。
And it’s becoming increasingly less cost-effective. When capital drains the soul out of movies, audiences can only vote with their feet, seeking new spiritual solace.

这，就是电影行业突然变凉的，全部真相。 它不是突然变凉的。 而是那口煮着青蛙的锅，水，终于烧开了。
This is the whole truth behind the sudden cooling of the film industry. It didn’t cool down suddenly. It’s like the pot boiling the frog—finally, the water has boiled.

那只被喂了太久料理包的青蛙，终于被烫死了。
That frog, fed 料理包 for too long, has finally been scalded to death.

作者：阿凯本凯-修罗道 链接：https://www.zhihu.com/question/7491591019/answer/1978010870580809845 来源：知乎 著作权归作者所有。商业转载请联系作者获得授权，非商业转载请注明出处。
Author: Akai Benkai - Xuluo Dao Link: https://www.zhihu.com/question/7491591019/answer/1978010870580809845 Source: Zhihu Copyright belongs to the author. Commercial reuse requires authorization from the author, non-commercial reuse 请注明出处.

如何用一年时间彻底改变人生？ 2026-01-04 阅读需要25分钟 我见过太多想改变自己的人。
How to completely change your life in one year? 2026-01-04 Reading time: 25 minutes I have seen too many people who want to change themselves.

但大多数都没有成功。
But most of them did not succeed.

我认识一个朋友 ，叫依博。
I know a friend named Yibo.

前年年底 ，我们一起吃饭。
Last year at the end of the year, we had a meal together.

他情绪很低落 ，说感觉自己的人生卡住了。
He was very downcast, saying he felt his life had hit a standstill.

工作五年 ，不上不下 ，薪水饿不死也富不了。谈了个女朋友 ，感觉快黄了 ，因为看不到未来。想发展个副业 ，学了剪辑、练了写作 ，都坚持不到一个月 。
After working for five years, he was stuck in a no-go situation—his salary wasn’t enough to live comfortably but not high enough to get rich. He had started a relationship, but it felt like it was about to fall apart because he couldn’t see a future together. He wanted to start a side business, learned video editing, and practiced writing, but neither lasted more than a month.

他说 ，他要改变。
He said he wanted to change.

我问他 ，你打算怎么改变？
I asked him, “What do you plan to change?”

他说 ，他要搞个 “ 重生计划” 。
He said, “He’s going to start a ‘Rebirth Plan’.”

每天六点起床 ，晨跑五公里。
Wake up at 6 a.m. every day, run 5 kilometers in the morning.

每天背五十个英语单词。
Memorize 50 English words every day.

每天看一小时专业书。
Read one hour of professional books every day.

每周去参加一次行业沙龙。
Attend an industry salon once a week.

戒掉游戏 ，戒掉宵夜 ，戒掉所有奶茶。
Quit games, quit late-night snacks, quit all bubble tea.

我听着那份堪比商业计划书的 “ 重生计划” ，什么也没说。
I listened to that “rebirth plan” which was as detailed as a business plan, saying nothing.

我只是给他夹了一筷子菜 ，跟他说 ，多吃点。
I just added a pair of chopsticks of food for him and said, “Eat more.”

一年后。
A year later.

我们又在同一个地方吃饭。
We ate at the same place again.

他看起来比一年前更颓了。
He looked more depressed than a year ago.

他说 ，一凡 ，我就是个废物。
He said, Yifan, I’m just a waste.

我问 ，怎么了？
I asked, What’s wrong?

他说 ，那个 “ 重生计划” ，执行了不到一个月 ，就彻底崩盘了。
He said, That “Rebirth Plan,” after less than a month of execution, completely collapsed.

六点起床 ，太困了 ，坚持了三天。
Got up at six, too sleepy, managed to stick with it for three days.

晨跑五公里 ，膝盖疼 ，坚持了一周。
Morning run for five kilometers, knees hurt, persisted for a week.

背单词 ，今天背了明天忘 ，毫无正反馈。
Memorize vocabulary, memorized today and forgot tomorrow, no positive feedback.

看书 ，看着看着就刷起了短视频。
Reading, reading and reading, then started watching short videos.

行业沙龙 ，去了一次 ，全是尬聊 ，再也不想去了。
Industry salon, went once, full of awkward small talk, never want to go again.

他说 ，我越是想用力 ，就越是感到无力 。越是想自律 ，就越是痛恨自己。
He said, the harder I try to exert myself, the more powerless I feel. The more I try to be disciplined, the more I hate myself.

我感觉我的人生不是卡住了 ，是锈死了。
I feel like my life isn’t stuck, it’s rusted.

我看着他 ，给他倒了杯茶。
I looked at him and poured him a cup of tea.

我说 ，依博 ，你有没有想过一个问题。
I said, Ebo, have you ever thought about a question.

一栋房子 ，地基是歪的 ，墙体是裂的 ，线路是老化的。
A house, with a crooked foundation, cracked walls, and aging wiring.

你现在做的 ，不是去修地基 ，不是去换线路。
What you’re doing now, isn’t fixing the foundation, isn’t replacing the wiring.

你是在花钱买很贵的壁纸 ，想把墙上的裂缝糊住。
You’re spending money on expensive wallpaper, trying to cover the cracks on the walls.

你是在买很高级的灯具 ，但老化的线路根本撑不起它的功率。
You’re buying very high-end lighting, but the aging wiring can’t even support its power.

你是在买很智能的家电 ，但地基不稳 ，房子随时可能再沉降一点 ，把一切都毁掉。
You’re buying smart home appliances, but the foundation is unstable, and the house could settle again at any moment, destroying everything.

你所谓的 “ 重生计划” ，就是那些昂贵的壁纸、灯具和家电。
What you call your “rebirth plan” are those expensive wallpapers, lighting fixtures, and home appliances.

而你那套破败的人生系统 ，才是那栋危房。
And your dilapidated life system is the dangerous house.

不重修系统 ，你做的一切 ，都是在给一堆垃圾做精装修。
Without renovating the system, everything you do is just giving a fancy makeover to a pile of garbage.

他愣住了 ，看着我 ，半天没说话。
He froze, looking at me, not saying a word for a long time.

然后问 ，那什么是系统？
Then he asked, What is the system?

我说 ，系统 ，就是你应对这个世界的 “ 底层操作系统” 。
I said, The system, it’s the “bottom operating system” you use to deal with this world.

它决定了你如何思考 ，如何选择 ，如何行动。
It determines how you think, how you choose, and how you act.

它才是你人生的地基。
That is the foundation of your life.

你过去所有的努力 ，都像是在Windows 95的系统上 ，想去运行最新款的人工智能软件。
All your past efforts are like trying to run the latest artificial intelligence software on a Windows 95 system.

结果只有一个：死机。
The result is only one: a crash.

所以 ，用一年时间彻底改变人生 ，不是让你去跑多少公里 ，不是让你去读多少本书 ，更不是让你去认识多少人。
So, spending a year to completely change your life is not about running how many kilometers, not about reading how many books, nor about meeting how many people.

这些都是 “ 术” ，是应用层的APP。
These are all “skills,” they are APPs at the application level.

真正的改变 ，是彻底重装你的人生操作系统。
The real change, is a complete reinstall of your life’s operating system.

这件事 ，只需要一年。
This matter, only takes one year.

甚至 ，如果你悟性够高 ，半年就够了。
Even, if you are wise enough, half a year is enough.

具体怎么做？分四步。
How to do it specifically? In four steps.

破障 ，立规 ，联网 ，控舟。
Breaking through obstacles, establishing rules, connecting, controlling the boat.

第一步：破障。 改变的第一步 ，不是 “得到” 什么 ，而是 “ 扔掉”什么。
Step 1: Break through obstacles. The first step of change is not about “getting” something, but about “throwing away” something.

给你的人生来一次彻彻底底的大扫除。
Give your life a thorough cleaning.

你必须把你脑子里的垃圾 ，和你生活里的垃圾 ，全部清理出去。
You must clean out all the garbage in your mind and all the garbage in your life.

什么是脑子里的垃圾？
What is the garbage in your mind?

我举个例子。
Let me give you an example.

你是不是经常觉得 “都是我的错” ？
Do you often feel “It’s all my fault”?

项目没做好 ，你觉得是自己能力不行。
The project wasn’t done well, and you think it’s because of your lack of ability.

伴侣不高兴 ，你觉得是自己情商太低。
Your partner is unhappy, and you think it’s because of your low emotional intelligence.

孩子不听话 ，你觉得是自己不会教育。
Your child is misbehaving, and you think it’s because you’re not good at educating them.

这种 “ 归罪于内”的思维模式 ，就像一个病毒 ，会不断蚕食你的能量。
This “blame yourself” mindset is like a virus, constantly devouring your energy.

让你永远觉得自己不够好 ，不配得。
Make you always feel that you are not good enough, not worthy.

还有一种垃圾 ，叫 “都是别人的错” 。
There is also a kind of trash, called “It’s always someone else’s fault.”

我没成功 ，是因为没个好爹。
I didn’t succeed, because I didn’t have a good father.

我没升职 ，是因为领导眼瞎。
I didn’t get promoted, because the boss is blind.

我没赚到钱 ，是社会不公。
I didn’t make any money, it’s because of social injustice.

这种 “ 归罪于外”的模式 ，会让你心安理得地待在原地 ，放弃任何改变的可能。
This “blaming others” mindset will make you content to stay in your place and give up any chance of change.

还有 ，他这么做 ，一定是对我有意见。他没回我信息 ，是不是我哪里得罪他了？他看了我一眼，是不是在嘲笑我？
Also, he must have something against me for doing this. He didn’t reply to my message, did I offend him somewhere? He glanced at me, was he mocking me?

这些无谓的内耗、猜忌、妄想 ，就是你脑子里最大的垃圾。
All this pointless internal conflict, suspicion, and delusion are the biggest garbage in your mind.

它们像后台程序一样 ，疯狂消耗你CPU的性能 ，让你真正该思考的事情 ，变得无比卡顿。所以 ，第一步 ，从今天起 ，用三个月的时间 ，只做一件事：观察你的念头。
They consume your CPU performance like background programs, making it incredibly sluggish for you to think clearly. So, the first step, starting today, is to dedicate three months to doing only one thing: observe your thoughts.

拿个本子 ，或者用手机备忘录。
Get a notebook or use your phone’s memo app.

每当你产生一个让你不舒服的念头时 ，把它记下来。
Whenever you have a thought that makes you uncomfortable, write it down.

比如：领导又批评我了 ，他就是看我不顺眼。我又把事情搞砸了 ，我真是个废物。我必须做到完美 ，不然别人会看不起我。
For example: “My boss criticized me again, he just dislikes me.” “I messed up the task again, I’m such a waste.” “I must achieve perfection, otherwise others will look down on me.”

你先不要评判它 ，不要对抗它。
Don’t judge it first, don’t oppose it.

你只是一个观察者 ，一个记录员。
You are just an observer, a recorder.

你就像一个生物学家 ，在观察一只猴子。你只是看 ，只是记 ，不跟猴子互动。
You are like a biologist observing a monkey. You just watch, just record, and don’t interact with the monkey.

当你记录了三个月 ，你再回头看。
After recording for three months, then look back.

你会震惊地发现 ，让你痛苦的 ，来来回回就那么几个固定的思维模式。
You will be shocked to discover that what causes you pain comes from just a few fixed thought patterns.

就像电脑病毒 ，它有固定的代码。
Like computer viruses, they have fixed code.

看清它 ，就是 “ 破障”的开始。
Seeing it clearly is the beginning of “breaking through obstacles.”

看清了 ，你才有机会对它说：滚。
Only when you see it clearly will you have the chance to tell it: Get out.

除了脑子里的垃圾 ，还有生活里的垃圾。
Besides the garbage in your mind, there’s also the garbage in life.

那些无效的社交。
Those 无效的社交.

那些只会消耗你 ，让你每次聚会完都感觉身体被掏空的朋友。
Those friends who only consume you and make you feel drained after every gathering.

那些你根本不穿 ，却堆满了衣柜的衣服。
Those clothes in your closet that you never wear but pile up.

那些你下载了从没打开过 ，却占满了手机内存的APP。
Those apps you downloaded but never opened, yet they’re taking up all your phone’s memory.

那些你关注了几百个 ，却只会让你越来越焦虑的公众号和博主。
Those public accounts and influencers you follow hundreds of, yet they only make you more anxious.

全部 ，清理掉。
All of them, get rid of them.

这个过程会很痛。
This process will be painful.

就像拔掉一颗烂牙。
Just like pulling out a rotten tooth.

但你必须这么做。
But you have to do it.

因为这些东西 ，在持续不断地制造 “熵增” ，让你的人生系统走向混乱和无序。
Because these things, continuously creating “entropy”, are leading your life system towards chaos and disorder.

清空 ，才能迎来新的可能。
Only by clearing it can new possibilities emerge.

这是地基工程的第一步：清障。
This is the first step of foundation engineering: clearing obstacles.

把所有垃圾都扔出去 ，腾出空间 ，才能开始建设。
Throw out all the trash, clear the space, and then you can start construction.

这三个月 ，你不需要学任何新东西。
For the next three months, you don’t need to learn anything new.

你的唯一任务 ，就是 “ 扔” 。
Your only task is “to throw.”

第二步：立规。 房子清空了 ，地基打扫干净了。
Step Two: Establish Rules. The house has been cleared out, and the foundation swept clean.

接下来 ，要立下规矩。
Next, it’s time to establish rules.

就像一个国家 ，要有宪法。
Like a country, it needs a constitution.

一个人的重生 ，也要有自己的 “ 个人宪法” 。
A person’s rebirth also needs their own “personal constitution.”

这个宪法 ，不是 “ 每天要跑五公里 ” 这种行为层面的规矩。
This constitution is not the kind of rule at the level of behavior, like “run five kilometers every day.”

而是 “ 决策层面 ”的规矩。
It is the rule at the level of decision-making.

我给你两条 ，最核心的规矩。
I give you two, the most core rules.

你把它刻在脑子里 ，用一辈子去执行。
Carve them into your mind, and use your whole life to execute them.

第一条规矩：凡事 ，多想一步。
First rule: For everything, think one step further.

普通人和高手的区别在哪里？
What’s the difference between ordinary people and experts?

就在于此。
It lies in this.

普通人决策 ，只看得到第一层。
Ordinary people’s decisions, they only see the first layer.

比如 ，一份工作 ，A公司月薪两万 ，但是个螺丝钉岗位 ，10年后你还是干这个。 B公司月薪八千，但能接触到核心业务 ，跟着一个很牛的团队 ，两年后你可能成为项目负责人。
For example, consider a job: Company A offers a monthly salary of 20,000, but it’s a 螺丝钉岗位 (a small, insignificant role), and in 10 years, you might still be doing the same job. Company B offers a monthly salary of 8,000, but you get to be involved in core business operations, working with a top-notch team, and in two years, you might become a project leader.

普通人会选A。
Ordinary people would choose A.

因为两万大于八千。
Because 20,000 is greater than 8,000.

这是第一层的思考。
This is the first level of thinking.

高手会选B。
Experts will choose B.

因为他看到了第二层 ，甚至第三层。
Because they saw the second layer, even the third layer.

第二层是：个人成长速度。 B远大于A。
The second layer is: personal growth speed. B is far greater than A.

第三层是：未来的赚钱能力 。两年后的B ，大概率会远远超过五年后的A。
The third layer is: future earning potential. B two years later will most likely far exceed A five years later.

这叫 “ 第二序思维” 。
This is called “Second-order thinking.”

再比如 ，你想减肥。
For example, if you want to lose weight.

节食 ，不吃饭。
Dieting, not eating.

第一层结果是：体重掉了 ，很开心。
The first-order result is: weight loss, very happy.

第二层结果是：基础代谢被摧毁 ，身体进入 “ 节能模式” 。
The second-level result is: Basal metabolism is destroyed, and the body enters a “energy-saving mode.”

第三层结果是：一旦恢复饮食 ，身体会疯狂储存能量以应对下一次 “ 饥荒” ，于是你比以前更胖。而且 ，你的身体健康被严重损害。
The third-level result is: Once diet is resumed, the body will 疯狂 store energy to prepare for the next “famine,” so you become fatter than before. Moreover, your health is severely damaged.

凡事 ，养成习惯 ，问自己三个问题：
For everything, develop habits, ask yourself three questions:

这个选择 ，直接后果是什么？（第一层）
What is the direct consequence of this choice? (First level)

这个后果 ，会引发什么连锁反应？（第二层）
What consequences will this trigger? (Second layer)

这些连锁反应 ，长期来看 ，对我有利还是有害？（第三层）
In the long run, will these chain reactions be beneficial or harmful to me? (Third layer)

当你能习惯性地思考到第二层 ，你就超越了身边80%的人。
When you are able to habitually think at the second layer, you surpass 80% of the people around you.

当你能思考到第三层 ，你基本就是人群中的顶级高手。
When you are able to think at the third layer, you are basically among the top experts in the crowd.

第二条规矩：倒着看问题。
Rule Two: Look at problems in reverse.

你想在一年内 ，彻底改变人生。
You want to completely change your life in a year.

好。
Okay.

请你想象一下 ，一年后的今天 ，那个你理想中的自己 ，是什么样的？
Please imagine, today one year from now, what your ideal self would be like?

把他具体地描绘出来。
Depict him specifically.

他从事什么工作？
What kind of work does he do?

他有什么样的能力？
What kind of abilities does he have?

他有什么样的精神状态？
What kind of mental state does he have?

他过着什么样的生活？
What kind of life was he living?

越具体越好。
The more specific, the better.

然后 ，从这个 “ 终点” ，往回推。
Then, working backward from this “endpoint.”

为了成为那个人 ，我在第十一个月的时候 ，应该已经完成了什么？
To become that person, what should I have accomplished by the eleventh month?

为了完成第十一个月的状态 ，我在第九个月的时候 ，应该已经具备了什么？
To complete the state of the eleventh month, what should I have possessed by the ninth month?

为了完成第二个月的状态 ，我下周应该做什么？
To complete the state of the second month, what should I do next week?

为了完成下周的任务 ，我今天必须做什么？
To complete the tasks of next week, what must I do today?

这叫 “ 逆向思维” 。
This is called “reverse thinking.”

大部分人是怎么做的？
How do most people do it?

他们站在起点 ，看着模糊的远方 ，说：我要去那里。
They stand at the starting point, looking at the blurry distance, saying: I want to go there.

然后 ，凭着感觉 ，往前走。
Then, following their instincts, they keep walking forward.

走着走着 ，就迷路了。
As they walk, they get lost.

而高手 ，是先用望远镜清晰地锁定终点 ，然后反向铺设一条通往终点的铁路。
While experts first use a telescope to clearly lock in the destination, then lay a railway leading back to the destination.

他走的每一步 ，都在轨道上。
Every step he takes is on the track.

这两条规矩： “ 第二序思维” 和 “ 逆向思维” 。
These two rules: “Second-order thinking” and “Reverse thinking.”

就是你个人宪法的总纲。
They are the general principles of your personal constitution.

用接下来三个月的时间 ，刻意地训练自己用这两个规矩去思考每一个选择。
Spend the next three months deliberately training yourself to use these two rules to think through every choice.

小到今天晚上吃什么。（吃烧烤 ，第一层是爽。第二层是高油高盐 ，影响睡眠质量。第三层是长期如此 ，健康受损 ，精力变差 ，影响工作状态。）
From small things like what to eat tonight. (Grill, the first layer is enjoyable. The second layer is high oil and high salt, affecting sleep quality. The third layer is long-term damage to health, reduced energy, and impacting work performance.)

大到要不要换个城市发展。（ 自己用这个模型推演一遍。）当这两条规矩 ，成为你本能的一部分。
To big decisions like whether to move to a different city. (Use this model to run through the scenario yourself.) When these two rules become a part of your instinct.

你的人生 ，就已经完成了底盘的重构。
Your life will have completed the reconstruction of its foundation.

你的选择质量 ，会发生天翻地覆的变化。
The quality of your choice will bring about earth-shattering changes.

第三步：联网。 如果你完成了前两步 ，恭喜你。
Step 3: Connect to the internet. If you’ve completed the first two steps, congratulations.

你已经拥有了一个干净、稳定、规则清晰的底层系统。
You now have a clean, stable, and clearly defined underlying system.

接下来 ，你要让这个系统 ，接入 “ 万维网 ” 。
Next, you need to connect this system to the “World Wide Web.”

你要开始理解 ，这个世界不是由孤立的 “ 点” 组成的。
You need to start understanding that this world is not composed of isolated “points.”

它是一张巨大、复杂、相互关联的 “ ⽹ ” 。
It is a vast, complex, interconnected “web.”

你的健康、你的事业、你的财富、你的情感、你的认知……它们都不是独立的模块。它们是同一个系统里的不同子系统 ，相互影响 ，互为因果。
Your health, your career, your wealth, your emotions, your cognition… they are not independent modules. They are different subsystems within the same system, mutually influencing each other, and causing each other.

我举个例子。
Let me give you an example.

很多人想赚钱。
Many people want to make money.

他想 ，我要去学理财 ，我要去找风口 ，我要去研究项目 。
He thought, I want to learn financial management, I want to find the windfall, I want to research projects.

他把 “ 赚钱”这件事 ，孤立地来看。
He looked at the matter of “making money” in isolation.

结果往往是 ，成了被收割的韭菜。
The result was often that he became the harvested wheat.

真正的高手怎么看？
How do true masters view it?

他会把 “ 赚钱” 看作是一个系统 “ 涌现” 出来的自然结果。
They see “making money” as a natural outcome that emerges from a system.

什么是涌现？
What is emergence?

一只蚂蚁 ，很傻。但一群蚂蚁 ，遵循简单的规则 ，就能涌现出 “ 蚁群智能” ，能建造复杂的巢穴，能规划最优的觅食路线。
A single ant is very foolish. But a group of ants, following simple rules, can emerge with “swarm intelligence,” capable of building complex nests and planning the optimal foraging routes.

一个神经元 ，很简单。但无数神经元连接起来 ，就涌现出了 “ 意识” 。
A neuron, very simple. But when countless neurons connect, “consciousness” emerges.

财富 ，也是一种 “ 涌现” 。
Wealth is also a kind of “emergence.”

它是你整个生命系统健康运转后 ， 自然而然产生的结果。
It is a natural result after your entire life system functions healthily.

你的身体健康了吗？
Is your body healthy?

精力充沛 ，才能支撑你高效工作 ，深度思考。这是财富的基础。
Full of energy, you can support your efficient work and deep thinking. This is the foundation of wealth.

你的情绪稳定吗？
Are your emotions stable?

不被烂人烂事消耗 ，才能把能量聚焦在创造价值上。这是财富的保障。
Only by not being consumed by bad people and bad things can you focus your energy on creating value. This is the guarantee of wealth.

你的家庭和睦吗？
Is your family harmonious?

一个稳固的后方 ，才能让你没有后顾之忧地在前方冲锋。这是财富的港湾。
A solid rear can let you charge forward without any worries. This is the harbor of wealth.

你的认知水平够高吗？
Is your cognitive level high enough?

能看懂别人看不懂的规律 ，能做出别人不敢做的决策。这是财富的放大器。
Can you see the patterns that others cannot understand, and make decisions that others dare not make. This is the amplifier of wealth.

你看 ，财富 ，只是这张 “ ⽹ ” 上一个闪亮的节点。
You see, wealth, is just a shiny node on this “net”.

你想让这个节点发光 ，你必须给整张网通上电。
You want this node to glow, you must power up the entire network.

所以 ，第三阶段 ，你要做的 ，是 “ 系统化” 地提升自己。
So, in the third stage, what you need to do is “systematically” improve yourself.

用三个月的时间 ，去建立至少三个领域的 “ 正反馈循环” 。
Spend three months to establish “positive feedback loops” in at least three fields.

什么是正反馈循环？
What are positive feedback loops?

就是 “越……就越 … …”的滚雪球效应。
It’s the snowball effect of “the more you …, the more you …”.

比如 ，健身。
For example, fitness.

你坚持健身 -> 精力变好 -> 工作效率提高 -> 得到领导赏识/客户认可 -> 收入增加/信心增强 -> 你更有动力去健身。
You stick to fitness -> Your energy improves -> Your work efficiency increases -> You gain recognition from your boss/client -> Your income increases/self-confidence strengthens -> You have more motivation to exercise.

这是一个 “ 健康-事业”的正反馈循环。
This is a positive feedback loop of “health-career”.

比如 ，阅读。
For example, reading.

你坚持阅读 -> 认知提升 -> 决策质量变高 -> 抓住了更好的机会 -> 让你尝到了认知的甜头 -> 你更爱阅读
You persist in reading -> Cognitive enhancement -> Improved decision quality -> Seized better opportunities -> Tasted the sweetness of cognition -> You love reading more

这是一个 “ 认知-财富”的正反馈循环。
This is a “cognition-wealth” positive feedback loop.

比如 ，沟通。
For example, communication.

你学习如何倾听和表达 -> 改善了和伴侣的关系 -> 家庭更和谐 ，内心更安宁 -> 你有更多的能量去应对外部世界 -> 事业发展更顺利 -> 你更有信心去维护亲密关系。
You learn how to listen and express -> improved your relationship with your partner -> the family is more harmonious, the inner self is more peaceful -> you have more energy to face the external world -> your career progresses more smoothly -> you have more confidence to maintain intimate relationships.

这是一个 “ 情感-事业”的正反馈循环。
This is a positive feedback loop of “emotion-career”.

这个阶段 ，你不要贪多。
At this stage, don’t be greedy.

就选三个你认为最重要的领域。
Just choose three areas you think are the most important.

比如：健康 ，认知 ，一个核心技能。
For example: health, cognition, a core skill.

然后 ，像一个系统工程师一样 ，设计并启动这三个领域的 “ 正反馈循环” 。
Then, like a systems engineer, design and launch the “positive feedback loops” in these three areas.

每天 ，问自己：
Every day, ask yourself:

我今天为我的健康系统 ，注入了什么能量？（ 比如 ，早睡半小时）
What energy did I inject into my health system today? (e.g., sleeping an extra half hour early)

我今天为我的认知系统 ，注入了什么能量？（ 比如 ，读懂一个新概念）
What kind of energy did I inject into my cognitive system today? (For example, understanding a new concept)

我今天为我的技能系统 ，注入了什么能量？（ 比如 ，刻意练习十五分钟）
What kind of energy did I inject into my skill system today? (For example, deliberately practicing for fifteen minutes)

当这几个雪球开始滚动起来 ，它们之间还会产生 “ 联动效应” 。
When these snowballs start rolling, they will also produce a “synergistic effect.”

一个精力充沛、认知清晰、技能扎实的人 ，他的整个生命状态 ，会像 “ 涌现” 一样 ，发生质变。他会变得自信 ，从容 ，有力量。
A person who is energetic, cognitively clear, and skilled will have their entire life state undergo a qualitative change, like “emergence.” They will become confident, composed, and powerful.

他看世界的方式 ，完全不一样了。
The way he sees the world has completely changed.

这就是 “ 联网 ”的力量。
This is the power of “联网” (networking).

第四步：控舟。 当你完成了前三步 ，你已经脱胎换骨了。
Step 4: Control the boat. When you have completed the first three steps, you have transformed.

你拥有一个干净的内在环境 ，一套清晰的决策法则 ，一个高效运转的生命系统。
You possess a clean inner environment, a set of clear decision-making principles, and an efficiently functioning life system.

你就像一艘全新的、坚固的、动力强劲的船。
You are like a brand new, sturdy, and powerful ship.

但是 ，人生这片大海 ，不是永远风平浪静的。
But, life is this vast ocean, and it’s not always calm.

随时可能有风暴 ，有冰山 ，有黑天鹅。
Storms, icebergs, and black swans may appear at any time.

所以 ，最后三个月 ，你要学会当一个好船长。
So, in the final three months, you must learn to be a good captain.

你要学会 “ 驾驭不确定性” 。
You need to learn to “驾驭不确定性” (驾驭 means to ride or master).

这里 ，我只给你一个最重要的心法：建立冗余。
Here, I only give you the most important mindset: establish redundancy.

什么叫冗余？
What is redundancy?

就是备份。就是Plan B。就是安全气囊。
It is backup. It is Plan B. It is a safety airbag.

你看那些大型客机 ，为什么那么安全？
You look at those large commercial aircraft, why are they so safe?

因为它在所有关键系统上 ，都有冗余设计。
Because they have redundant design on all key systems.

一套发动机坏了 ，还有备用的。
One set of engines fails, there are backups.

一套液压系统失灵 ，还有备用的。
One set of hydraulic systems fail, there are backups.

反观我们的人生 ，很多人是在 “ 裸奔” 。
Looking back at our lives, many people are “naked running.”

一份收入 ，一旦失业 ，全家陷入困境。
A source of income, once unemployment strikes, the entire family falls into hardship.

一个核心技能 ，一旦被AI替代 ，瞬间失去价值。
A core skill, once replaced by AI, instantly loses its value.

一种信息渠道 ，一旦被封锁 ，立刻变成信息孤岛。
An information channel, once blocked, immediately becomes an information island.

一段亲密关系 ，一旦破裂 ，感觉整个世界都崩塌了。
A close relationship, once broken, feels like the whole world has collapsed.

这就是 “ 反脆弱性”太差。
This is what it means to have “poor anti-fragility.”

一个脆弱的系统 ，在压力和冲击下 ，会崩溃。
A fragile system will collapse under pressure and impact.

一个强固的系统 ，能抵抗压力。
A robust system can withstand pressure.

而一个 “ 反脆弱”的系统 ，能在经历冲击后 ，变得更强大。
And an “anti-fragile” system can become stronger after experiencing shocks.

建立冗余 ，就是打造 “ 反脆弱性”的第一步。
Building redundancy is the first step in creating “anti-fragility.”

从现在开始 ，有意识地在你人生的关键领域 ，建立 “ 备份” 。
From now on, consciously build “backups” in the key areas of your life.

收入冗余：
Income redundancy:

在你的主业之外 ，能不能开辟一个能产生哪怕几百块钱收入的副业？这个副业的目的 ，初期不是为了赚钱。
Outside of your main occupation, can you develop a side hustle that generates even a few hundred dollars in income? The purpose of this side hustle, in the initial stage, is not to make money.

而是为了让你拥有 “ 在主业之外也能生存”的能力和信心。
Instead, it is to give you the ability and confidence to survive outside of your main occupation.

它是一个 “ 求生舱” 。
It is a “survival pod.”

能力冗余：
Redundancy in capability:

除了你吃饭的核心技能 ，你能不能再培养一个看似 “ ⽆⽤ ”的技能？比如 ，你是个程序员 ，能不能去学学心理学？
Besides your core skill of eating, can you cultivate another skill that seems “useless”? For example, if you are a programmer, can you learn psychology?

你是个销售 ，能不能去学学写作？
If you are a salesperson, can you learn writing?

这种 “ 跨界”的能力组合 ，会在未来的某个时刻 ，涌现出惊人的竞争力 ，让你实现 “ 非对称作战” 。
This “cross-disciplinary” skill combination will emerge as incredible competitiveness at some point in the future, allowing you to achieve “asymmetric warfare.”

情感冗含：
Emotional connotation:

除了你的伴侣 ，你有没有至少一两个 ，可以无话不谈 ，深度信任的同性朋友？他们是你的 “ 情绪缓冲垫” 。
Besides your partner, do you have at least one or two same-sex friends you can talk about anything with and deeply trust? They are your “emotional buffer.”

能在你人生最艰难的时候 ，给你提供最纯粹的支持。
Who can provide you with the purest support during the most difficult times in your life.

认知冗余：
Cognitive Redundancy:

你的信息来源 ，是不是太单一了？
Is your source of information too 单一?

你能不能刻意地去读一些和你专业、观点完全相反的书籍和文章？
Can you deliberately read some books and articles that are completely opposite to your profession and views?

这能让你避免陷入 “ 信息茧房” ，拥有更立体、更完整的视角。
This can help you avoid falling into the “filter bubble” and give you a more three-dimensional and comprehensive perspective.

这最后三个月 ，就是你作为船长 ，为你的 “ 人生之舟 ” 进行全方位的安全升级。
These last three months are your time as the captain, to comprehensively upgrade the safety of your “lifeboat.”

安装最好的雷达（认知冗余）。
Install the best radar (cognitive redundancy).

装备最强的备用引擎（能力冗余）。
Equip the strongest backup engine (capacity redundancy).

储备最充足的救生艇（收入冗余）。
Stock the most sufficient lifeboats (income redundancy).

建立最可靠的通讯系统（情感冗余）。
Establish the most reliable communication system (emotional redundancy).

当这一切都完成。
When all of this is complete.

一年过去了。
A year has passed.

你再回头看。
If you look back now.

你可能还是住在原来的房子里 ，做着原来的工作。
You might still be living in the same house, doing the same job.

但是 ，你很清楚 ，你已经完全不是一年前的那个人了。
But you know very well that you are no longer the person you were a year ago.

你的眼神 ，变了。
Your gaze, has changed.

你的气质 ，变了。
Your demeanor, has changed.

你说话的方式 ，变了。
The way you speak, has changed.

你看待世界的眼光 ，彻底变了。
Your perspective on the world, has completely changed.

你不再是那个在路灯下乱撞的飞虫。
You are no longer that insect bumping around under the streetlights.

你成了一只鹰 ，在高空盘旋 ，清晰地看到地面的山川、河流和自己的目的地。
You have become an eagle, soaring high, clearly seeing the mountains, rivers on the ground, and your own destination.

你获得了真正的自由。
You have gained true freedom.

不是财务自由 ，而是 “ 认知自由” 。
Not financial freedom, but “cognitive freedom.”

你知道什么是对的 ，什么是错的。
You know what is right and what is wrong.

你知道什么是重要的 ，什么是不重要的。
You know what is important and what is not important.

你知道什么是你能掌控的 ，什么是你必须接受的。
You know what you can control and what you must accept.

你的人生 ，从失控 ，走向了掌控。
Your life, from out of control, has moved towards control.

这就是用一年时间 ，彻底改变人生的路径。
This is the path that completely changes one’s life in one year.

破障 ，立规 ，联网 ，控舟。
Breaking through obstacles, establishing rules, connecting, controlling the boat.

每一步 ，九十天。
Every step, ninety days.

这很难吗？
Is this that hard?

其实 ，每一步的具体操作 ，都不难。
Actually, the specific operations for each step are not difficult.

难的是 ，你看不到这张 “全局地图” 。
The challenge is that you can’t see this “global map.”

难的是 ，你不知道每一步背后的底层逻辑。
The challenge is that you don’t know the underlying logic behind each step.

我今天聊的 ，只是冰山一角 ，是一个极度简化的框架。
What I discussed today is just the tip of the iceberg, an extremely simplified framework.

在 “ 破障”时 ，你会遇到 “ 沉没成本谬误”的拉扯 ，会掉进 “ 确认偏误” 的陷阱。
When facing “Breaking Barriers,” you will encounter the pull of the “Sunk Cost Fallacy” and fall into the trap of “Confirmation Bias.”

在 “ 立规”时 ，如何精准判断 “ 机会成本” ，如何避免 “框架效应”的迷惑？
When establishing “Rules,” how to accurately judge “Opportunity Cost,” and how to avoid the confusion of the “Framing Effect”?

在 “ 联网 ”时 ，如何识别并设计 “ 反馈循环” ，如何理解系统中的 “ 瓶颈” ？
When “Connecting,” how to identify and design “Feedback Loops,” and how to understand the “Bottlenecks” in the system?

在 “ 控舟 ”时 ，如何用“ 贝叶斯定理” 来动态调整你的航向 ，如何理解 “ 黑天鹅事件” 的必然性？
When “Controlling the Ship,” how to use “Bayes’ Theorem” to dynamically adjust your course, and how to understand the inevitability of “Black Swan Events”?

每一个环节 ，背后都对应着一套强大的 “ 元认知模型” 。
Every step corresponds to a powerful “metacognitive model” behind it.

过去几年，我一直在做这件事。
Over the past few years, I have been doing just this.

就是把我从古今中外的经典里，从行走大地的见闻里，从无数次的与人交谈的感悟里，提炼、萃取出的这些思维工具，打磨成一套系统的心法。
That is to refine and distill these thinking tools from the classics of ancient and modern times, from the experiences of traveling the world, and from the insights gained from countless conversations with others, into a systematic set of mental methods.

我把它写成了一部30万字的电子书，取名为《格物心法》。
I wrote it as a 300,000-word e-book titled “The Art of Inquiry.”

它不讲那些遥远的历史故事，它只讲这些故事背后，那个普通人也能学会的、永恒不变的“理”。
It doesn’t talk about those distant historical stories; it only talks about the eternal and unchanging “reason” that an ordinary person can learn behind these stories.

它分为五大模块，共50个这样的思维模型，像50把钥匙，帮你打开你认知里的50道锁。
It is divided into five major modules, with a total of 50 such thinking models, like 50 keys to help you open 50 locks in your cognition.

从最基础的“奥卡姆剃刀”，帮你清理思维垃圾；到决策层的“第二序思维”，让你比别人多看三步；再到系统级的“熵增定律”，让你理解万物兴衰的规律。
From the most basic “Occam’s Razor” to help you clean up mental clutter; to the decision-making level “Second-Order Thinking” that allows you to see three steps ahead of others; to the system-level “Entropy Law” that helps you understand the laws of rise and fall of all things.

这不仅仅是一本书。
This is not just a book.

它更像是一个“思维的健身房”。
It’s more like a “gym for the mind.”

但我也深知，一个人健身，很难坚持。
But I also know that it’s hard for one person to stick with it when working out alone.

再好的心法，如果没有一个场域去练习、去讨论、去印证，最终也只会束之高阁，变回“正确的废话”。
Even the best methods will ultimately end up gathering dust and becoming just “correct but pointless talk” if there’s no space to practice, discuss, or validate them.

真正的成长，需要“同路人”。
True growth requires “fellow travelers.”

一群志同道合的人，聚在一起，形成一个“能量场”。
A group of people with shared aspirations gather together, forming an “energy field.”

在这个场里，你的困惑，有人能理解；你的洞见，有人能共鸣；你的懈怠，有人能鞭策。
Within this field, your confusion can be understood by someone; your insights can resonate with someone; your laziness can be spurred on by someone.

这就是我创立“长青盟”社群的初衷。
This is the original intention behind the creation of the “Evergreen Alliance” community.

它是一个专为成长型女性打造的终身成长生态。我们以《格物心法》这套认知体系为底层代码，通过每周的体系大课，去不断升级我们看待世界的方式。
It is a lifelong growth ecosystem designed specifically for growth-oriented women. We use the “Method of Inquiry” cognitive system as the underlying code, continuously upgrading the way we perceive the world through weekly system courses.

《格物心法》这部电子书，只是加入长青盟的其中一项权益。更重要的，是获得一个可以让你安心“格物”的场域，一群可以陪你终身成长的姐妹。
《The Method of Inquiry》this ebook is just one of the benefits of joining the Evergreen Alliance. More importantly, it is to gain a field where you can safely “inquire,” a group of sisters who can grow with you for life.

如果你厌倦了在迷雾里独自摸索，如果你渴望拥有一套清醒、强大的思维操作系统，去解构你的事业、你的关系、你的人生。
If you are tired of 摸索 ing alone in the fog, if you are eager to own a clear and powerful thinking operating system to deconstruct your career, your relationships, your life.

那么，这或许是你一直在寻找的那个“路口”。
Then, this may be the “intersection” you have been looking for.

你可以点击头像看主页简介最后一行，找到加入「长青盟」社群、获取《格物心法》的方式。
You can click on the avatar to see the homepage introduction, find the last line to join the ‘Evergreen Alliance’ community, and get the way to obtain 《The Method of Inquiry》.

它可能无法立刻解决你的所有问题。
It may not be able to solve all your problems immediately.

但它会给你一双，能自己找到所有答案的“眼睛”。
But it will give you a pair of “eyes” that can find all the answers by yourself.

它不是鸡汤 ，更不是什么成功秘籍。
It’s not chicken soup, nor is it any secret formula for success.

它是一个 “ 人生操作系统”的安装手册。
It’s an installation manual for a “life operating system.”

你可以通过重装自己的操作系统 ，去亲手创造一个你想要的人生。
You can create the life you want by reinstalling your own operating system.

你 ，就是你此生 ，最伟大的作品。
You, you are the greatest work of this life.

从今天起 ，用一年的时间 ，去雕琢它。
From today, spend a year to refine it.

声明：本文来自《一凡日记》专栏
Statement: This article is from the column “Yifan Diary”

文章时常被删屏蔽，如有收获，可在评论区获取本篇《一凡日记》5000字PDF版
The article is often deleted or censored. If you gain something, you can get the 5000-word PDF version of this “Yifan Diary” in the comments.

我是一凡，长青盟创始人、源头日记合伙人
I am Wei Fan, founder of the Evergreen Alliance and partner of Source Diary.

长青盟，是专为成长型女性打造的终身成长社群。
Evergreen Alliance is a lifelong growth community created specifically for growth-oriented women.

我们不止是一个社群，更是一个深度融合了「私域电商」x「知识付费」x「自媒体赋能」的完整成长生态。
It is not just a community, but a complete growth ecosystem that deeply integrates ‘private domain e-commerce’ x ‘knowledge payment’ x ‘influencer empowerment’.

我们陪伴你，以品质健康生活为基石，以精神富足为内核，最终成长为能够持续盈利的超级个体。
We accompany you, with quality and healthy living as the foundation, spiritual fulfillment as the core, ultimately growing into a super individual capable of sustainable profitability.

为什么新加坡70％华人却疏远中国？一位新加坡华人说了实话！ 在深圳一场行业论坛的茶歇时间，一位42岁的新加坡华人李国梁端着咖啡杯，轻轻叹了口气说，在新加坡的华人，根本不在乎中国到底好不好。这句话让周围的中国同行瞬间陷入了沉默。同样流淌着华人血脉，为何会有这样的疏离感？答案或许就藏在新加坡人每一天的真实生活与这个国家的生存逻辑里。 许多国人看到新加坡满街的华人面孔，总会产生一种远房亲戚般的亲切感。但真正踏入他们的生活就会发现，这种基于血脉的想象往往一厢情愿。一个新加坡年轻人可能身份证上写着华人，却认不全中国的省份，看中文电视剧需要依靠字幕。对他们而言，中文更多是一门实用的工作技能，就像程序员学习代码，下班后便切换回更自如的英语模式。新加坡政策研究所的调查揭示了更深层的原因：这个国家的教育体系和社会导向，自始至终都在精心培育新加坡人的国家认同，而非华人的民族认同。他们的爱国情怀，指向的是新加坡这片土地，而非遥远的祖籍地。 这种身份认同，是新加坡从建国之初就做出的清醒选择。在这个华人占多数的国度，政府却刻意抑制多数族群的优势，将多元种族和谐定为立国之本。你可能会听说，一些华裔毕业生在求职时，即使成绩优异，也可能因为企业需要满足少数族裔的招聘比例而落选。政府甚至通过住房政策，确保每个社区、每栋楼都有合理的种族比例，防止华人形成封闭的社群。这一切都是为了一个目标： 让所有国民，无论种族，都首先坚信自己是新加坡人。正如一位新加坡华人所说，他们对中国的感情，是一种文化上的羁绊，绝不意味着政治忠诚的转移。 那么，新加坡华人的生活重心在哪里？在组屋的抽签结果里，在即将上涨的消费税里，在孩子小六会考的成绩里。他们每月缴纳的税款支撑着新加坡的社保与医疗，未来的养老依赖于本国的公积金体系。中国的兴衰，对他们柴米油盐的日常没有直接影响。这种务实主义也延伸到了国家层面。民调显示，过半新加坡人将中国视为重要的战略伙伴，但这同样是出于对国家利益的冷静计算——中国是巨大的市场，是紧密的贸易伙伴，新加坡从中受益匪浅。这种关系是互利共赢的伙伴关系，而非基于血缘的温情脉脉。 所以，理解新加坡华人，需要我们放下血缘纽带的固有期待。他们的”根”，经过几代人的生长，早已深植于新加坡的土壤。他们吃海南鸡饭，讲混合式英语，在多元种族的社会中寻找自己的位置。他们的身份优先级非常清晰：首先是新加坡人，然后才是华人。这不是忘本，而是在特定历史与地缘政治环境下，一个族群为了生存与发展所做的自然选择。这种选择，基于对自身所属国家的归属与责任，值得我们抛开情绪，给予一份理性的理解和尊重。
Why are 70% of Singaporeans of Chinese descent estranged from China? A Singaporean of Chinese descent spoke the truth! During a coffee break at an industry forum in Shenzhen, a 42-year-old Singaporean of Chinese descent, Li Guoliang, holding a coffee cup, sighed lightly and said, the Chinese in Singapore simply don’t care whether China is good or bad. This remark made the surrounding Chinese colleagues fall into silence instantly. With the same Chinese blood flowing through them, why would there be such a sense of estrangement? The answer may be hidden in the real lives of Singaporeans every day and the survival logic of this country. Many Chinese people see the faces of Chinese people on every street in Singapore and always feel a kind of kinship with distant relatives. But truly stepping into their lives reveals that this kind of imagination based on blood is often one-sided. A young Singaporean may have “Chinese” written on their ID card but cannot name all the provinces in China, and needs subtitles to watch Chinese dramas. To them, Chinese is more of a practical working skill, like programmers learning code, and they switch back to a more comfortable English mode after work. The Institute of Policy Studies’ survey revealed deeper reasons: the country’s education system and social orientation have always been meticulously cultivating national identity among Singaporeans, rather than ethnic identity among Chinese people. Their patriotism is directed towards this land, not the distant ancestral homeland. This sense of identity is a clear choice made from the very beginning of Singapore’s founding. In a country where Chinese people are the majority, the government deliberately suppresses the advantage of the majority ethnic group, making multicultural harmony the cornerstone of the nation. You may have heard that some Chinese-heritage graduates may be rejected from jobs even with excellent grades, because companies need to meet hiring quotas for minority ethnic groups. The government even uses housing policies to ensure a reasonable racial mix in every community and building, preventing Chinese people from forming closed-off communities. All of this is for one goal: to make all citizens, regardless of race, first and foremost believe they are Singaporeans. As one Singaporean of Chinese descent said, their feelings for China are a cultural bond, and absolutely do not mean a shift in political loyalty. So, where is the focus of life for Singaporean Chinese people? In the results of HDB lottery draws, in the upcoming increase in consumption tax, in the results of their children’s Primary 6 exams. The taxes they pay monthly support Singapore’s social security and healthcare, and their future retirement depends on the country’s CPF system. The rise and fall of China have no direct impact on their daily lives of rice, oil, and salt. This pragmatism extends to the national level as well. Surveys show that over half of Singaporeans view China as an important strategic partner, but this is also based on a calm calculation of national interests—China is a huge market, a close trading partner, and Singapore benefits greatly from it. This relationship is a mutually beneficial partnership, not one based on familial warmth and affection. Therefore, to understand Singaporean Chinese people, we need to let go of our inherent expectations based on blood ties. Their “roots” have long been deeply planted in the soil of Singapore after several generations of growth. They eat Hainanese chicken rice, speak hybrid English, and find their place in a multicultural society. Their identity priorities are very clear: first as Singaporeans, then as Chinese. This is not forgetting one’s roots, but rather a natural choice made by a group for survival and development in specific historical and geopolitical environments. This choice, based on a sense of belonging and responsibility to the country they belong to, deserves rational understanding and respect from us, free of emotions.

人生 2025-12-15 阅读需要11分钟 16岁，你早早告别校园，踏入了复杂的社会
Life 2025-12-15 Reading time: 11 minutes 16 years old, you bid farewell to school early and step into the complex society

20岁，你遇见一个阳光耀眼的男孩，谈了一场掏心掏肺、不管不顾的恋爱
At 20, you meet a boy with a radiant smile, and you fall in a heart-stirring, reckless love

你满心满眼都是他，想和他携手走进婚姻
Your heart and eyes are entirely filled with him, wanting to walk hand in hand into marriage

可那时的你太稚嫩，不懂如何经营感情，也没看清人心
But you were too naive back then, didn’t know how to nurture relationships, and couldn’t see through people’s hearts

爱情好像总爱开玩笑，开头有多热烈，结局就有多冷清
Love seems to always love playing tricks; the more passionate the beginning, the colder the ending

人尽皆知的心动，最后只剩悄无声息的散场，他走得干脆，留你独自收拾满心伤痕
The heart-stirring feeling everyone knows, ultimately leaves only a silent and quiet end, he left decisively, leaving you to clean up the full heart wounds

21岁，在社会摸爬滚打几年，换了好几份工作
21 years old, after struggling in society for a few years, changing several jobs

却始终找不到一份安稳又顺心的，委屈时连个倾诉的人都没有
but still can’t find a stable and satisfactory one, even without someone to vent to when feeling wronged

23岁，终于找到一份稍有前景的工作，曾经眼里的光，却早已被现实磨得黯淡，没了当初的意气风发
23 years old, finally found a job with some prospects, the light in the eyes once had, had long been worn dim by reality, lost the original ambition and enthusiasm

25岁，看着身边朋友陆续结婚生子，随出去的份子钱越来越多
At 25, watching your friends get married and have children one after another, the amount of money you have to contribute as a gift keeps increasing

春节回家，父母不再带你走亲访友，而是频繁安排相亲，见了十几个男生
When you go home during the Spring Festival, your parents no longer take you to visit relatives and friends, but instead frequently arrange blind dates, meeting over a dozen men

可每一个都比不过当初的他，再也没有过心跳加速、满心欢喜的感觉，心里空落落的
But none of them can compare to him from back then, there’s no longer the feeling of your heart racing or being overjoyed, leaving you with a hollow emptiness inside

28岁，你遇到一个性格温和的男生，彼此有着相似的经历，偶尔聊几句日常
At 28, you meet a gentle-natured man, who has similar experiences to you, and you occasionally chat about daily life

他说：你挺好的，踏实靠谱
He said: You’re quite good, steady and reliable

你抿了口奶茶，轻声回应：你也不错
You took a sip of milk tea and replied softly: You’re not bad either

其实你心里没多少波澜，甚至不确定是不是喜欢他
Actually, you didn’t have much turmoil in your heart, not even sure if you liked him

双方家长却早已敲定婚事，匆匆摆好了订婚宴
But both sets of parents had already settled the marriage, hastily arranging the engagement party

结婚前一周，你和闺蜜出去散心，忍不住说：我好像还没准备好结婚
One week before the wedding, you and your best friend went out for a walk, unable to help but say: I don’t think I’m ready to get married yet.

闺蜜叹了口气：谁不是这么过来的？日子过着过着就顺了
Your best friend sighed: Who doesn’t go through this? Things will just fall into place over time.

你没说话，心里的不安越来越重
You didn’t say anything, but the unease in your heart grew heavier.

29岁，你还是穿上了婚纱，举办了一场不算隆重也不算简陋的婚礼
At 29, you still put on the wedding dress and held a wedding that wasn’t overly grand nor overly simple

攒了好几年，想用来提升自己、出去看看世界的钱，全花在了这场仪式上
The money saved over several years, intended to improve myself and explore the world, was all spent on this ceremony

婚礼进行到一半，司仪带着程式化的笑容起哄：让新郎新娘亲一个好不好？
Halfway through the wedding, the officiant, with a scripted smile, chanted: “How about a kiss from the groom and bride?”

台下亲友跟着欢呼，你却觉得格外陌生
The relatives in the audience cheered along, but you felt particularly alienated

他轻轻碰了碰你的唇，动作敷衍又仓促
He gently touched your lips, the gesture careless and rushed

回到站位时，你小声说了句：我爱你，连自己都没底气
When you returned to your spot, you whispered, “I love you,” not even having the confidence for yourself

那个前几天还嫌你收拾东西麻烦的新郎，愣了一下，随口回了句：嗯，知道了
The groom, who had complained about you packing things being troublesome just a few days ago, paused for a moment and casually replied, “Mm, I know”

你分不清他是不是真心，就像不确定自己这份妥协的感情，到底算不算爱
You couldn’t tell if he was sincere, just like you couldn’t be sure if this compromised feeling of yours truly counted as love

婚礼结束后，没有想象中的浪漫温馨
After the wedding, there was no romantic warmth as imagined

你坐在屋里一笔一笔算着份子钱，心里五味杂陈
You sat in the house calculating the wedding gift money stroke by stroke, feeling a mix of emotions in your heart

不过才短短两年，怎么就把日子过成了这样？想着想着，疲惫感席卷而来，洞房夜竟独自睡着了
It had only been a short two years, how did things turn out like this? As you kept thinking, a wave of exhaustion washed over you, and you even fell asleep alone on your wedding night

30岁，你怀孕了，为了孩子，果断辞掉了工作，在家专心养胎
At 30, you got pregnant. For the sake of the child, you decisively quit your job and focused on nurturing the pregnancy at home

他在公司慢慢有了起色，应酬越来越多，回家的时间越来越晚
Meanwhile, he was gradually making headway at the company, attending more and more social engagements, and coming home later and later

婚前他送你的那辆代步车，也成了他的专属，从不会问你出门方便不方便
The mobility scooter he gave you before marriage also became his exclusive possession, never asking if it was convenient for you to go out

孕期反应折磨得你整夜难眠，孕吐、腰酸、失眠接踵而至
The pregnancy symptoms tormented you, keeping you up all night with morning sickness, back pain, and insomnia one after another

每次打电话给他，要么是匆忙挂断，要么是不耐烦的敷衍，说自己工作忙、压力大
Every time you called him, he either hung up hastily or gave impatient, evasive responses, saying he was busy with work and under a lot of pressure

你委屈得想哭，却连个发泄的对象都没有，双方父母只劝你忍忍，说怀孕都这样，让你多体谅他
You felt so aggrieved you wanted to cry, yet you had no one to vent to. Both sets of parents only advised you to endure, saying pregnancy is like this and to be more understanding of him

那一刻，你忽然觉得自己像个孤岛，孤立无援
At that moment, you suddenly feel like an isolated island, helpless and alone

31岁，孩子顺利出生，前前后后孕检、住院、买母婴用品，花光了家里大半积蓄
At 31, your child is born smoothly; from prenatal check-ups, hospital stays, to buying baby supplies, you’ve spent most of your family’s savings

可看着怀里小小的、软软的孩子，所有的辛苦好像都烟消云散了
But looking at the tiny, soft child in your arms, all the hardships seem to dissipate like smoke

你满心欢喜，仿佛迎来了自己的新生，也盼着日子能慢慢好起来
You are overjoyed, as if you’ve welcomed a new beginning for yourself, and you hope that things will gradually improve

32岁，这是你这辈子最煎熬、最不想回头的一年
32, this is the most tormenting and least desirable year of your life

孩子夜里每隔一小时就哭闹一次，喂奶、换尿布、哄睡，熬得你身心俱疲
The child cries every hour at night, whether it’s feeding, changing diapers, or soothing them, leaving you exhausted both physically and mentally

平均每天睡眠不足3小时，第二天顶着黑眼圈、带着满身奶渍，还要打理家务、照顾孩子
An average of less than 3 hours of sleep per day, with dark circles under your eyes and milk stains all over your body, while still having to manage household chores and take care of the child

他依旧早出晚归，回家要么倒头就睡，要么刷着手机，从不会主动搭把手
He still leaves early and comes back late, either falling asleep the moment he gets home or scrolling through his phone, never 主动 offering to help

你忍不住抱怨几句，他却说你无理取闹、在家闲着还不知足
You couldn’t help but complain a few words, but he said you were being unreasonable, staying at home all day yet still not satisfied

老板偶尔打电话对接工作，语气里满是嫌弃，说你脱离职场太久、跟不上节奏
Your boss occasionally called to coordinate work, his tone full of disdain, saying you’d been out of the workplace too long and couldn’t keep up with the pace

你坐在沙发上愣了很久，明明自己从早忙到晚，怎么就成了“闲着”？
You sat on the sofa stunned for a long time, you had been busy from morning till night, how could you have become “idle”?

后来，家里的阳台成了你唯一的避风港
Later, the balcony at home became your only shelter from the storm

每天等孩子睡熟、他不在家的时候，你会坐在那里发呆半小时
You’ll sit there staring blankly for half an hour every day, waiting until your child is sound asleep and you’re not at home

看着窗外的风景，心里满是迷茫，这不是你想要的生活啊
Gazing at the scenery outside the window, your mind filled with confusion, realizing this is not the life you want

35岁，孩子慢慢长大，你想重返职场，却发现早已跟不上时代的步伐
At 35, as your child grows, you long to return to the workforce, only to find you’ve long fallen behind the pace of the times

身材因为生孩子走样发福，皮肤变得松弛暗沉，看着镜子里的自己，满是焦虑和自卑
Your figure has changed and expanded after giving birth, your skin has become loose and dull, and looking at yourself in the mirror, you’re filled with anxiety and self-doubt

他不仅没有安慰，反而时常吐槽你臃肿、邋遢，回家越来越晚，甚至开始隐瞒行踪
He not only didn’t comfort you, but often criticized you for being overweight and messy, coming home later and later, and even started hiding his whereabouts

你偶然发现他手机里的暧昧信息，质问他时，他却理直气壮，说只是工作往来，还指责你无理取闹、不信任他
You accidentally discovered 暧昧 messages on his phone, and when you confronted him, he justified himself, saying it was just work-related, and even accused you of being unreasonable and not trusting him

你们开始频繁争吵，从柴米油盐的小事，到彼此的不信任，家里再也没有过安宁
You started arguing frequently, from small matters like daily necessities to mutual distrust, and there was no peace in the house anymore

你整夜整夜失眠，看着身边熟睡的孩子，只能咬着牙忍下来
You couldn’t sleep all night, watching the sleeping child beside you, and could only grit your teeth and endure

38岁，孩子上了一年级，老师说一年级是打基础的关键期，不能马虎
38 years old, the child has started first grade, and the teacher said that first grade is a critical period for laying a foundation, so it can’t be taken lightly

你陪着孩子写作业、背课文，每天忙到深夜，他却依旧不管不顾，偶尔还会因为孩子成绩不好指责你
You accompany your child with homework and reciting texts, busy every day until late at night, but he still doesn’t care, occasionally even blaming you for your child’s poor grades

为了让孩子不输在起跑线上，你咬牙给孩子报了课外辅导班，一个月2200块
To prevent your child from falling behind at the starting line, you gritted your teeth and enrolled him in extracurricular tutoring classes, costing 2200 yuan a month

这笔钱，你原本想给自己买套护肤品，改善一下糟糕的皮肤状态，最后还是放弃了
This money, you originally wanted to use to buy a set of skincare products to improve your terrible skin condition, but you ended up giving up

40岁，孩子上了三年级，老师说承上启下很重要，需要再加几个兴趣班
At 40, your child is in third grade, and the teacher says it’s important to bridge the gap, so you need to add a few more interest classes.

你笑着答应，转身却偷偷抹眼泪，家里的开支越来越大，他的工资从不主动上交，每次要钱都要小心翼翼、看他脸色
You agree with a smile, but turn around and secretly wipe away tears. Household expenses are getting bigger and bigger, and he never voluntarily hands over his salary. Every time you ask for money, you have to be careful and watch his expression.

你开始打零工补贴家用，白天上班，晚上照顾孩子、打理家务，累得喘不过气，他却始终视而不见
You start taking on part-time jobs to support the family. You work during the day, take care of the child and handle household chores at night, feeling completely exhausted, but he always turns a blind eye.

44岁，孩子上了初中，有一天你接到老师的电话，说孩子在学校和同学闹矛盾，让你去一趟
At 44, your child is in middle school. One day, you receive a call from the teacher saying there was a conflict between your child and classmates, and you need to come to school

你跟老板请假，小心翼翼地说着好话，赶到学校又被老师一顿批评，说你只顾着工作，忽略了孩子的教育
You asked your boss for leave, carefully saying nice things, but when you rushed to school, you were criticized by the teacher for only caring about work and ignoring your child’s education

你满心委屈，明明自己已经拼尽全力平衡家庭和工作，可最后错的永远是自己
You felt deeply wronged, as you had already done your best to balance family and work, yet in the end, it was always you who was at fault

回家后，你想和他聊聊孩子的情况，他却不耐烦地打断你，说自己工作累，让你别烦他
When you got home, you wanted to talk to him about your child’s situation, but he impatiently cut you off, saying he was tired from work and didn’t want any trouble

你们又一次争吵，他摔门而去，留下你和孩子在屋里，你抱着孩子，忍不住放声大哭
You argued again, and he stormed out the door, leaving you and your child alone in the house. You held your child, unable to hold back your tears

50岁，孩子考上了一本大学，专业很冷门，你有点担心他以后不好找工作
At 50, your child got into a top-tier university, but the major is quite niche, and you’re a bit worried about his future job prospects

深夜里，你准备了孩子爱吃的菜，想和他好好聊聊未来的规划
Late at night, you prepared his favorite dishes, wanting to have a proper talk about his future plans

你说着那些曾经自己最讨厌的话：选个热门专业吧，以后好找工作，活着比热爱重要
You said those words you once disliked the most: Choose a popular major, it’s easier to find a job later, survival is more important than passion

你们从交流变成了争吵，孩子说你不理解他，说不想活成你这样委屈压抑的样子
The conversation turned into an argument, with your child saying you don’t understand him, and that he doesn’t want to live like you, feeling oppressed and stifled

你看着眼前长大成人的孩子，忽然觉得无比心酸，自己这辈子过得这么委屈，不就是想让孩子过得好一点吗？
You look at the child before you who has grown into an adult and suddenly feel an overwhelming sense of heartache. Haven’t I endured so much injustice in this life, just so that my child could have a better one?

争吵最后不欢而散，你坐在餐桌前，看着凉透的饭菜，眼泪忍不住掉了下来
The argument ended unhappily, and you sat at the dining table, tears unable to hold back as you looked at the cold food.

都50岁的人了，怎么还是这么没用，连和孩子好好沟通都做不到
At 50, how can I still be so useless, unable even to communicate well with my child?

55岁，孩子参加工作了，偶尔会跟你说工作的辛苦，你忽然想起了年轻时的自己
At 55, your child has started working, occasionally telling you about the hardships of the job, and you suddenly remember yourself in your youth

你反过来安慰他：不用勉强自己，不用妥协，跟着自己的心意走就好
You comforted him in return: Don’t force yourself, don’t compromise, just follow your heart

孩子愣了愣，抱着你说了句：妈，对不起，以前是我不懂事
The child hesitated for a moment, hugging you and saying: Mom, I’m sorry, I was ignorant back then

你拍着他的背，眼泪止不住地流，这么多年的委屈，好像终于有了一丝慰藉
You patted his back, tears streaming uncontrollably, as if the years of grievances finally found a glimmer of solace

56岁，孩子要结婚了，你问他：真的喜欢那个姑娘吗？
At 56, your child is getting married, and you ask him: Do you really like that girl?

他愣了愣，沉默了一会儿说：喜欢吧，她很懂事，能好好过日子
He paused for a moment, then said: “You like it, she’s very sensible, can live a good life

你看着他，仿佛看到了当年的自己，心里满是心疼，却又无能为力
You look at him, as if you see yourself from years ago, your heart full of sympathy, yet helpless

60岁，辛苦了一辈子，你想和他出去走走，看看外面的世界
At 60, having worked hard all your life, you want to take him out for a walk, to see the world outside

相伴了30年，你们依旧会因为一点小事争吵，彼此的隔阂越来越深，却早已习惯了这样的相处模式
After 30 years together, you still argue over small things, your differences growing deeper, yet you’ve long been accustomed to this way of coexisting

你们好不容易敲定了旅游路线，收拾好了行李
You finally settled on the travel route and packed your luggage

儿子却打来电话：爸妈，我工作太忙了，你们能不能帮我照顾一下孩子？
Son called instead: Mom and Dad, I’m too busy with work, can you help me take care of the kids?

你和他对视一眼，默默退了机票，又回到了日复一日照顾孩子的生活，仿佛回到了30年前
You exchanged a glance with him, quietly cancelled your flight, and returned to the daily life of caring for the children, as if you had returned to 30 years ago.

70岁，孙子也长大了，不用天天操心了，你下定决心，一定要出去看看
At 70, your grandson had also grown up and no longer needed daily worry, you made up your mind to definitely go out and see the world.

可身体早已大不如前，腿脚变得不灵便，手里的拐杖只能支撑你走到楼下的花园
But your body was already much worse, your legs and feet had become less agile, and the cane in your hand could only support you to walk to the garden downstairs

他的身体也不好，时常生病，你们不再争吵，偶尔会一起坐在花园里晒太阳，沉默不语
His health is not good either, and he often gets sick. You no longer argue, and occasionally you sit together in the garden basking in the sun, in silence.

这么多年了，你依旧分不清，对他到底是爱，还是习惯，或是无奈
After all these years, you still can’t tell, whether it’s love for him, or habit, or just helplessness.

75岁，你躺在医院的病床上，身边聚满了人，孩子、孙子、还有陪伴了你一辈子的他
At 75, you lie on the hospital bed, surrounded by people—your children, grandchildren, and him, who has been by your side for your entire life.

你迷迷糊糊地看见医生摇了摇头，周围的人神情凝重，你忽然明白了，自己快要离开了
You see the doctor shake his head in a daze, and the expressions of the people around you are somber. Suddenly, you realize that you are about to leave

没有害怕，只有一种解脱般的轻松，你忽然问自己：我到底是什么时候“死掉”的呢？
There is no fear, only a sense of relief, and you suddenly ask yourself: When did I “die”?

你想起来，30岁那场敷衍的婚礼，发现他暧昧信息的那个夜晚，无数次独自崩溃的瞬间
You remember, the perfunctory wedding at 30, the night you discovered his ambiguous messages, the countless moments of solitary collapse.

原来，早在那些日子里，那个曾经眼里有光、满心欢喜的自己，就已经死掉了
It turns out that long ago, in those days, the version of yourself who once had light in their eyes and was full of joy had already died.

依照惯例，死前的3秒，大脑会走马灯，倒叙这75年的一生，画面一张一张翻过
According to custom, in the last three seconds before death, the brain goes through a rapid montage, replaying the 75 years of life, with each scene flipping past

1秒，2秒，两秒过去了，你面无表情地看着那些委屈、争吵、压抑的回忆
1 second, 2 seconds, two seconds passed, and you looked blankly at those memories of grievances, arguments, and repression

第3秒，你忽然笑了，画面回到了20岁那一年
In the 3rd second, you suddenly smiled, and the scene returned to when you were 20 years old

阳光正好，你坐在角落里，抬头看见一个男孩笑着朝你走来，眼里满是温柔
The sunlight was just right, and you sat in the corner, looking up to see a boy walking towards you with a smile, his eyes full of tenderness

那是20岁的你，满心欢喜爱着的人，你早已记不清他具体的模样，却记得当时心动的感觉
That was you at 20, full of joy and loving the person you had back then. You had long forgotten his specific appearance, but you remembered the feeling of being smitten at that time

最后一秒，你努力回忆着，嘴角的笑意越来越浓
The last second, you try to recall, the smile on your lips grows stronger

三秒过去，身边的人突然嚎啕大哭，你听不清他们在说什么，只隐约听到一群二十岁的少年起哄：“去表白啊！”“在一起！在一起！在一起！”
Three seconds pass, and the person beside you suddenly starts crying uncontrollably. You can’t hear what they’re saying, only faintly hear a group of twenty-year-old teenagers cheering: “Go confess!” “Together! Together! Together!”

这一次，你终于笑着，释怀了
This time, you finally smile, feeling relieved

为什么回到家和父母待在一起就会变得戾气特别重？ 2026-01-07 阅读需要17分钟 为什么回到家和父母待在一起就会变得戾气特别重？
Why does my temperament become particularly harsh when I’m at home with my parents? 2026-01-07 Reading time: 17 minutes Why does my temperament become particularly harsh when I’m at home with my parents?

外面是精英，回家成“暴君”？
Outsiders are elites, but at home they become “tyrants”?

一个读者，小微，给我留言。
A reader, Xiao Wei, left a message for me.

她说，一凡姐，我是不是有病？心理疾病。
She said, Sister Yi Fan, do I have a disease? A psychological illness.

我说，怎么了？
I asked, What’s wrong?

她说，我在上海做总监，管着几十号人的团队，处理上千万的项目，每天跟各种难缠的客户、挑剔的甲方周旋，再大的压力，我都能做到情绪稳定，说话得体。身边的同事、朋友，都夸我情商高，性格好，是个特别靠谱、特别温柔的人。
She said, I am a director in Shanghai, managing a team of dozens of people, handling projects worth tens of millions, dealing with difficult clients and picky clients every day. No matter how much pressure, I can stay emotionally stable and speak appropriately. My colleagues and friends around me all praise me for having high emotional intelligence, a good personality, and being a particularly reliable and gentle person.

可是，只要我一回到老家，见到我爸妈，就好像变了一个人。
However, as soon as I come back to my hometown, see my parents, I seem to become a different person.

我说，变成了什么样？
I asked, What kind of person have I become?

她说，一个魔鬼，一个一点就炸的火药桶。
She said, a demon, a powder keg that explodes at the slightest provocation.

我妈让我穿秋裤，我说都什么年代了，你不懂时尚。她唠叨第二句，我就吼她，你烦不烦啊！
My mom told me to wear long johns, and I said, “What era is this? You don’t understand fashion.” The second she started nagging again, I yelled at her, “Do you bother me or not!”

我爸让我早点睡，说熬夜对身体不好。我说你在公司上过一天班吗？知道我背着多大的KPI吗？不熬夜行吗？他叹口气，我就摔门进房间。
My dad told me to go to bed early, saying staying up late is bad for health. I said, “Have you ever worked a day in a company? Do you know how much KPI I have to carry?” Can I not stay up? He sighed, and I slammed the door and went into my room.

就前天，我妈炖了锅鸡汤，一个劲儿地给我舀汤，说多喝点，补补身体，看你瘦的。那鸡汤油得不行，我实在喝不下了。
The other day, my mom made a pot of chicken soup, constantly scooping soup for me, saying, “Drink more, it’s good for your health. Look how thin you are.” The soup was incredibly oily, and I couldn’t drink it anymore.

我说，妈，我真饱了。
I said, “Mom, I’m really full.”

她又舀了一碗，说，再喝点，精华都在汤里。
She scooped another bowl and said, “Have some more, the essence is all in the soup.”

我说，我不喝了，油太大。
I said, “I don’t want any more, it’s too oily.”

她立马拉下脸，说，我辛辛苦苦给你炖的，你不喝就是不领情，嫌弃我做的不好吃是不是？
Her face fell immediately. “I worked hard to cook this for you,” she said, “if you don’t drink it, it’s like you’re not appreciative, or you don’t like how I cook, right?”

我当时那股火，“噌”地一下就顶到了天灵盖，把筷子往桌上一拍，冲她喊，你到底想怎么样？我说了不喝！你是爱我还是在满足你自己的控制欲？
At that moment, my anger shot straight to the top of my head. I slammed the chopsticks on the table and yelled at her, “What do you want?” I said I don’t want to drink! Do you love me or are you satisfying your own need for control?

整个屋子瞬间就安静了，我妈眼圈红了，我爸在旁边一声不吭地抽烟。
The entire room fell silent instantly, my mother’s eyes grew red, and my father smoked quietly without a word beside her.

那一刻，我心里又后悔又难受，可我就是道不了歉。
At that moment, I felt both regretful and heartbroken, but I couldn’t apologize.

回到上海，夜里想起这一幕，我抽自己耳光。我觉得自己就是个混蛋，是个白眼狼。把最坏的脾气，最伤人的话，全都给了最爱我的父母。
When I returned to Shanghai, thinking of that scene at night, I slapped myself. I felt like such a bastard, a ungrateful person. I gave my most hateful temper and the most hurtful words to the parents who loved me the most.

一凡姐，我到底是怎么了？为什么在外面我是天使，一回家就变成了魔鬼？
Big Sister Yifan, what is wrong with me? Why am I an angel outside, but turn into a devil the moment I come home?

我看着小微发来的一长串文字，仿佛看到了千千万万个在城市里披荆斩棘，却在“家”这个字面前，瞬间破防的成年人。
I looked at the long string of text sent by Xiaowei, as if I saw countless adults who had been struggling in the city, yet instantly broke down in front of the word “home.”

我回复她，你没病。
I replied to her, you’re not sick.

你只是，一脚踩回了你童年的“程序场”。
You’ve just stepped back into the “programming field” of your childhood.

什么意思？
What does it mean?

我跟她说，你有没有想过，家，不仅仅是一个物理空间，它更是一个“能量场”，或者说，是一个“程序场”。
I told her, have you ever thought that home is not just a physical space, but more of an “energy field,” or perhaps, a “program field.”

从你出生开始，你父母的每一句话，每一个眼神，每一个行为模式，都在为你编写一套最底层的“行为程序”。
From the moment you were born, every word your parents said, every glance they gave, every behavioral pattern they exhibited, was writing a set of deepest-level “behavioral programs” for you.

这套程序，决定了你在家里的“角色设定”。
This program determines your “role setting” at home.

比如，一个从小被严格管教的孩子，她的程序里就被写入了“服从”与“压抑”。
For example, a child who was strictly disciplined from a young age has “obedience” and “repression” programmed into her system.

一个从小被拿来和别人家孩子比较的孩子，她的程序里就被写入了“自卑”与“证明”。
A child who was compared to other people’s children since childhood, “insecurity” and “proof” were programmed into her.

一个从小不被允许哭泣、不被允许表达真实感受的孩子，她的程序里就被写入了“懂事”与“讨好”。
A child who was not allowed to cry or express her true feelings since childhood, “being sensible” and “please others” were programmed into her.

你在外面，在上海，在你自己的公司里，那里是你的主场。
You are outside, in Shanghai, in your own company, that is your home ground.

在那个场域里，你运行的是一套全新的程序系统，是你自己成年后，靠着你的学识、能力、阅历，一砖一瓦建立起来的“精英操作系统”。
In that field, you are running a completely new program system, the “elite operating system” you built brick by brick with your knowledge, abilities, and experience after you grew up.

这个系统，让你专业、理性、克制、游刃有余。
This system lets you be professional, rational, restrained, and at ease.

所以，你是个天使。
So, you’re an angel.

可一旦你拎着行李箱，踏进家门的那一刻。
But once you grab your suitcase and step into your home at that moment.

空气中熟悉的味道，墙上熟悉的老照片，父母熟悉的说话语气……这一切，就像一个“激活指令”。
The familiar scent in the air, the old photos on the wall, your parents’ familiar way of speaking… all of this is like an “activation command.”

“滴”的一声。
A click.

你那套牛哄哄的“精英操作系统”，瞬间被强制下线。
Your so-called “elite operating system,” was instantly forced offline.

然后，那套尘封已久的，你童年时被安装的“老旧操作系统”，自动重启了。
Then, the dusty, old “outdated operating system” that was installed during your childhood, automatically restarted.

你，被打回了原形。
You, were reverted to your original form.

你不再是上海的总监，你变回了那个无论做什么，都可能被挑剔、被纠正、被安排的小女孩。
You are no longer the director of Shanghai, you have reverted to being that little girl who could be criticized, corrected, and directed no matter what she did.

而你的父母，也自动切换回了他们最熟悉的角色——“设定者”和“管理者”。
And your parents automatically switched back to their most familiar roles—“setters” and “managers.”

他们看到的，不是一个能管几十号人的总监，而是一个连秋裤都不会自己穿、鸡汤都不知道要喝的“孩子”。
What they saw was not a director who could manage dozens of people, but a “child” who couldn’t even put on her own knee-highs or know whether to drink chicken soup.

于是，一场系统冲突，不可避免地爆发了。
Thus, a system conflict inevitably broke out.

你所谓的“戾气”，那股无名火，是什么？
What is the so-called “hostility” you refer to, that nameless fire?

是你的“新系统”和“旧系统”在打架。
It is your “new system” and “old system” clashing.

是你成年后的独立意识，在反抗那个被设定、被安排的“童年角色”。
It is your independent consciousness as an adult, resisting the “childhood role” that was set and arranged.

是你内心深处那个渴望被看见、被尊重、被平等对待的“成年自我”，在向那个固化的“程序场”发出最声嘶力竭的怒吼。
It is the “adult self” deep within your heart, yearning to be seen, respected, and treated equally, shouting the most hoarsely at that rigid “program field.”

所以，你不是脾气变坏了。
So, it’s not that your temper has worsened.

你只是，回家“中毒”了。中的是那个名为“过去”的毒。
You’ve just been “infected” at home. Infected with the poison named “the past.”

小微沉默了很久，发来一句话。
Xiao Wei was silent for a long time, then sent a message.

姐，我好像有点懂了。这个“程序场”的比喻，太形象了。那我该怎么办？卸载这个旧程序吗？可我爸妈就是“程序员”啊，只要他们还在，这个程序就永远在。
Sister, I think I kind of understand. This metaphor of a “program field” is too vivid. So what should I do? Uninstall this old program? But my parents are the “programmers,” and as long as they’re still around, this program will never be gone.

我说，你搞错了一个核心问题。
I say, you’ve missed a core issue.

你痛苦的根源，不在于这个“旧程序”本身，而在于你总想跟它“硬刚”。
The root of your pain doesn’t lie in this “old program” itself, but in your constant desire to “go head-to-head” with it.

你每次回家，都像一个英勇的战士，试图用你那套“新系统”，去攻击、去改造、去覆盖那个“旧系统”。
Every time you go home, you act like a valiant warrior, trying to attack, reform, and overwrite the “old system” with your “new system.”

你想证明给他们看：我长大了，我比你懂，你应该听我的，你不该再管我了！
You want to prove to them: I’ve grown up, I understand better than you, you should listen to me, you shouldn’t meddle in my affairs anymore!

结果呢？
What about it?

你发现，你所有的努力，都像是拳头打在棉花上。
You realize that all your efforts are like striking fists against cotton.

那个“程序场”太强大了，它运行了几十年，根深蒂固。你越反抗，它对你的捆绑和消耗就越严重。你的“戾气”，就是你跟它搏斗时，被消耗掉的能量。
That “program field” is too powerful; it has been running for decades, deeply entrenched. The more you resist, the more severe its binding and consumption of you become. Your “hostility,” is the energy you lose while fighting against it.

所以，真正的解法，不是去“攻击”和“改造”这个场。
So, the true solution is not to “attack” or “transform” this field.

你改变不了他们。就像你无法教一个用惯了功能机的人，去理解智能手机的复杂逻辑。他们的“出厂设置”就是那样，那是他们一辈子的经历和认知决定的。
You can’t change them. Just like you can’t teach someone who’s used to feature phones to understand the complex logic of smartphones. Their “factory settings” are like that, determined by their lifelong experiences and perceptions.

真正的解法，是“破场”。
The real solution is to “break the scene.”

怎么破？
How to break it?

不是逃离，不是对抗，而是——升级你自己的“防火墙”和“兼容模式”。
Not to escape, not to confront, but to—upgrade your own “firewall” and “compatibility mode.”

我给她讲了三个步骤。
I told her three steps.

第一步：从“角色扮演”到“身份切换”。
Step 1: From “role-playing” to “identity switching.”

你以前回家，潜意识里扮演的是什么角色？
Before, when you went home, what role did you subconsciously play?

是“女儿”。
It was “daughter.”

一个渴望被父母理解、认可、甚至夸奖的女儿。当这种渴望得不到满足，反而得到的是控制和唠叨时，你的身份就瞬间切换成了一个“叛逆的女儿”。
A daughter who longs to be understood, recognized, and even praised by her parents. When this desire is not met but instead replaced with control and nagging, your identity instantly shifts to that of a “rebellious daughter.”

这种“角色”的设定，本身就充满了期待和依赖，是脆弱的。
This “role” is inherently filled with expectations and dependencies, making it fragile.

现在，你要换一个身份回家。
Now, you need to adopt a different identity to go home.

什么身份？
What identity?

一个“慈悲的观察者”。或者，一个“来探望两位老朋友的客人”。
A “compassionate observer.” Or, a “visitor coming to see two old friends.”

想象一下，你不是他们的女儿，你只是一个和他们有点渊源的晚辈，来家里做客。
Imagine that you are not their daughter, but just a younger generation with some connection to them, visiting their home.

你会怎么做？
What would you do?

你会发现，你的心态完全变了。
You would find that your mindset has completely changed.

他们让你穿秋裤，你会笑着说，“谢谢阿姨关心，我不冷，您自己多穿点。”
They ask you to wear long johns, you will smile and say, “Thank you for your concern, Aunty. I’m not cold, you should wear more.”

他们让你喝汤，你会说，“叔叔阿姨，你们炖的汤真香，我已经吃得很饱了，你们慢慢喝。”
They offer you soup, you will say, “Uncle and Aunty, the soup you’ve stewed is so fragrant. I’m already full, you guys enjoy your meal.”

他们催你早点睡，你会客气地说，“好的，你们也早点休息，我再看会儿文件就睡。”
They urge you to go to bed early, you will politely say, “Alright, you guys rest early too. I’ll stay up a bit longer to look at some documents.”

你看，当你切换了身份，你就不再把他们的话当成是对你的“控制”，而是当成一种属于他们那个年代的，“爱的表达方式”。
See, when you switch your identity, you no longer take their words as “control” over you, but rather as a “way of expressing love” from their generation.

你不再试图去纠正他们，你只是作为一个“客人”，去礼貌地、温和地、但坚定地，表达你自己的状态。
You no longer try to correct them; you simply act as a “guest,” expressing your own state politely, gently, but firmly.

你不再期待他们能“懂”你，因为你本来就不指望一个老朋友能完全理解你的工作和生活。
You no longer expect them to “understand” you, because you never expected an old friend to fully grasp your work and life.

这种心态的转变，就是你为自己建立的第一个“防火墙”。它能帮你隔绝掉80%的情绪化语言攻击。
This shift in mindset is the first “firewall” you’ve built for yourself. It can help you block out 80% of emotionally charged verbal attacks.

第二步：放弃“改造”的执念，看见“实然”。
Step two: Let go of the obsession with “reforming” and see the “reality as it is.”

我们很多人回家痛苦，是因为心里揣着一个“理想父母”的模板。
Many of us suffer when we go home because we hold a template of an “ideal parent” in our hearts.

我们希望他们能像心理学书籍里写的那样，跟我们温和沟通，尊重我们的边界，理解我们的压力，为我们的成就喝彩。
We hope they can communicate with us gently, as described in psychology books, respect our boundaries, understand our stress, and cheer for our achievements.

这叫“应然”，应该的样子。
This is called “ought-to-be,” the way things should be.

但现实呢？
But what about reality?

他们可能就是爱唠叨，爱比较，认知有局限，不懂得如何表达爱。
They might just be talkative, competitive, and have limited cognition, not knowing how to express love.

这叫“实然”，实际的样子。
This is called “reality,” the actual state.

你所有的“戾气”，都来自于“应然”和“实然”之间的巨大鸿沟。你总想把“实然”的他们，改造成“应然”的样子。这是你痛苦的又一个根源。
All your “hostility” comes from the huge gap between “should be” and “is.” You always want to transform the “is” of them into the “should be” state. This is another source of your suffering.

怎么办？
What should you do?

格物。
Gexue.

什么是格物？就是去探究事物的本来面貌。
What is Gexue? It is to explore the true nature of things.

你不要把他们当成“父母”这个功能性角色，你把他们当成两个独立的“人”去研究。
Don’t treat them as the “parents” in a functional role. Treat them as two independent “people” to study.

我爸，他为什么这么固执？哦，原来他年轻时在单位就是个小领导，习惯了发号施令。他一辈子没求过人，所以他的爱，也带着命令的口气。
Why is my father so stubborn? Oh, it turns out he was a small leader in the unit when he was young and was used to giving orders. He has never asked for anything in his life, so his love also carries an authoritative tone.

我妈，她为什么这么焦虑，总觉得我过得不好？哦，原来她从小在物质匮乏的年代长大，吃不饱穿不暖，所以她毕生的安全感，都建立在“吃好穿暖”这种最基本的事情上。她拼命给你舀汤，不是为了控制你，而是她在用自己唯一懂得的方式，给你她认为最宝贵的“安全感”。
Why is my mother so anxious, always thinking I’m not doing well? Oh, it turns out she grew up in an era of material scarcity, not having enough to eat or wear, so her entire sense of security is built on the most basic things like “eating well and dressing warmly.” She’s trying so hard to serve you soup, it’s not to control you, but she’s using the only way she knows to give you what she believes is the most precious “sense of security.”

当你像一个人类学家一样，去“格”你父母的“物”，去了解他们的成长史，他们的思维局限，他们的恐惧和匮乏……
When you approach your parents like an anthropologist, examining their “possessions” and understanding their history of growth, their mental limitations, their fears and lack…

你会生出一种“看见”之后的慈悲。
You’ll develop a kind of compassion after “seeing” them.

你不再跟他们的“行为”较劲，因为你看见了行为背后那个，同样被命运和时代束缚的，弱小而无助的“内核”。
You no longer argue with their “behaviors” because you see the vulnerable and helpless “core” behind them, one that is also bound by fate and the times.

你甚至会有点心疼他们。
You might even feel a bit sorry for them.

戾气，就在这份看见和慈悲中，慢慢化解了。
The fierceness gradually dissolves within this act of seeing and compassion.

第三步：建立“非暴力沟通”的边界。
Step 3: Establish boundaries for “Nonviolent Communication.”

心态变了，方法也要跟上。
Mindset changes, methods must follow.

一味地忍让和逃避，解决不了问题。你需要在温和中，坚定地为自己立下边界。
Constantly tolerating and avoiding won’t solve the problem. You need to firmly set boundaries for yourself in a gentle manner.

比如，你妈又开始说，“你看隔壁王叔叔家的女儿，都生二胎了，你连个对象都没有……”
For example, your mom might start saying, “You see the daughter of the Wang next door, she already has a second child, and you don’t even have a partner…”

以前的你，可能会直接顶回去，“那你认她当女儿好了！”
In the past, you might have retorted directly, “Then why don’t you adopt her as your daughter!”

结果就是一场大战。
The result is a big fight.

现在，你可以试试“非暴力沟通”的句式：陈述事实+表达感受+提出需求。
Now, you can try the “Nonviolent Communication” sentence structure: State the fact + Express feelings + Propose a need.

“妈，当您拿我和别人比较的时候（事实），我感觉很难过，也很焦虑，觉得自己很失败，不被您认可（感受）。我特别需要您的鼓励和支持，而不是比较。以后您能不能多看看我的优点，别老拿我跟别人比了？（需求）”
“Mom, when you compare me to others (fact), I feel very sad and anxious, feel like I’m a failure, and that I’m not recognized by you (feelings). I really need your encouragement and support, not comparisons. In the future, can you look at my strengths more often and stop comparing me to others? (need)”

说这段话的时候，语气要诚恳，要柔软，甚至可以带着一点点撒娇的示弱。
When saying this, your tone should be sincere, soft, and even a little bit like a baby showing vulnerability.

记住，没有人能拒绝一个真诚表达自己脆弱感受的人。
Remember, no one can refuse someone who sincerely expresses their vulnerable feelings.

当你不再用“攻击”的姿态，而是用“求助”的姿态去沟通，你就不是在“顶撞”她，而是在“邀请”她进入你的内心世界，来帮助你。
When you no longer communicate with an “attacking” stance but with a “seeking help” stance, you are not “defying” her, but rather “inviting” her into your inner world to help you.

这等于给了她一个台阶，也给了你们的关系一个全新的，可以平等对话的出口。
This is equivalent to giving her a way out, and also giving your relationship a brand new, equal dialogue opportunity.

一次不行，就两次，三次。
If once doesn’t work, try twice, then three times.

每一次温和而坚定的边界设定，都是在为你那个“旧程序场”，注入新的代码。
Every gentle yet firm boundary setting is injecting new code into your “old program field.”

慢慢地，他们也会在你的引导下，开始学着用一种新的方式跟你相处。
Slowly, they will also start learning to interact with you in a new way under your guidance.

小微听完，很久没有说话。
After listening, Xiao Wei didn’t speak for a long time.

我能感觉到，屏幕那头的她，正在经历一场小型的思想地震。
I could feel that the her on the other end of the screen was going through a small intellectual earthquake.

我说，这些道理听起来简单，做起来很难。因为这本质上是一场“心力”的较量。你的心力强了，就能破这个场。心力弱，就依然会被卷进去。
I said, these principles may sound simple, but they are hard to put into practice. Because this is fundamentally a battle of “mental strength.” If your mental strength is strong, you can break through this field. If your mental strength is weak, you will still be swept up in it.

这需要刻意练习。
This requires deliberate practice.

她说，姐，你说的这些，我好像在一些心理学的书里看过零散的观点，但从来没有像你这样，把它们串成一个如此清晰、如此有操作性的“心法”。特别是那个“程序场”和“身份切换”的说法，简直是醍-醐-灌-顶。
She said, “Sister, the things you’ve mentioned, I seem to have seen scattered viewpoints in some psychology books, but I’ve never had them woven together as clearly and operationally as you’ve done into a ‘mind method.’ Especially the concepts of ‘program field’ and ‘identity switching’—it’s truly enlightening.”

她问，这些智慧，都是您自己悟出来的吗？
She asked, “Are all these insights something you’ve 悟 (wù - understood/realized) on your own?”

这几年，我一直在做一件事。
In these past few years, I’ve been doing one thing.

就是把我从古今经典、从行走大地、从无数次深度对谈中，提炼萃取出的那些能够帮助人完成认知跃迁的底层规律，打磨成一个个清晰的“思维模型”。
It is the underlying principles that can help people achieve cognitive leaps, which I have extracted from ancient and modern classics, from traversing the earth, and from countless in-depth conversations, refined and polished into clear “thinking models.”

最终，我打磨了一套课程，取名《人生格物学》。
Ultimately, I have refined a course named “The Study of Human Life.”

比如，我们今天谈到的“熵增定律”，就是系统思维篇里的核心模型之一，它能让你看清为何一切事物都需要持续维护。谈到的“园丁”心态，其内核是“控制二分法”的应用，管好你能管的，接受你不能管的。而找到自己的战场，背后则是“非对称作战”的战略思想。
For example, the “Second Law of Thermodynamics” we discussed today is one of the core models in the System Thinking chapter, which can help you see why everything needs continuous maintenance. The “Gardener’s Mindset” has its core in the application of the “Control Dichotomy,” managing what you can manage and accepting what you cannot. And finding your own battlefield is based on the strategic thinking of “Asymmetric Warfare.”

它不是给你唯一的答案，而是为你提供一个更高维度的“脚手架”，让你自己能够看清问题的本质，并推导出适合自己的解决方案。
It does not give you a single answer, but rather provides a higher-dimensional “scaffolding” for you to see the essence of the problem and derive solutions that suit you.

但我也深知，一本再好的书，如果只是一个人默默地看，力量也是有限的。
But I also deeply know that even the best book has limited power if only one person reads it silently.

真正的成长，发生于“知行合一”的实践场。
True growth occurs in the practice field of “unity of knowledge and action.”

因此，我创立了「长青盟」社群。
Therefore, I founded the “Evergreen Alliance” community.

这是一个专为像小微这样，渴望成长，渴望突破，渴望活出生命舒展状态的女性，所打造的终身成长生态。
This is a lifelong growth ecosystem created specifically for women like Xiaowei, who are eager to grow, eager to break through, and eager to live a life of full expression.

在这里，我们每周会有一堂体系大课，带你重构身、心、局、业、道五大生命维度。
Here, we have a systematic course every week that guides you to reconstruct the five major life dimensions: body, mind, perspective, career, and path.

我们希望它能成为你认知升级的“地基”，而社群，则是在这个地基之上，与一群同路人，共同建造属于自己生命大厦的“道场”。
We hope it can become the “foundation” for your cognitive upgrade, while the community serves as the “playground” built upon this foundation, where you can work together with fellow travelers to construct your own life palace.

如果你也像小微一样，感觉自己被一个无形的“壳”限制住了，明明拥有更大的潜力，却总是在关键时刻退缩。
If you also feel, like Xiao Wei, restricted by an invisible “shell,” possessing greater potential yet always retreating at critical moments.

那么，我邀请你，来到这里。
Then, I invite you, to come here.

你可以在主页简介最后一行，找到加入我们的入口。
You can find the entry to join us on the last line of the homepage introduction.

后来，又过了几个月，春节的时候，小微给我发来一张照片。
Later, after a few more months, during the Spring Festival, Xiao Wei sent me a photo.

是她家的年夜饭，她爸妈在镜头前笑得很开心。
It’s her family’s New Year’s Eve dinner, and her parents are smiling happily in front of the camera.

她附上文字说：
She added a caption saying:

一凡姐，我今年回家，全程都在“角色扮演”。我假装自己是来家里做客的“远房侄女”，对叔叔阿姨嘘寒问暖，陪他们聊天，听他们讲过去的故事，绝不参与任何关于我个人生活的“辩论”。
Aunty Yifan, when I came home this year, I was entirely in “role-playing.” I pretended to be a “distant cousin” visiting the house, asking my uncle and aunt how they were doing, chatting with them, listening to their stories about the past, and never participating in any “debates” about my personal life.

我妈让我穿红袜子，说本命年辟邪，我笑着说“好嘞，听您的，图个吉利”。
My mom made me wear red socks, saying they bring good luck in the year of the horse. I smiled and said, “Alright, I’ll listen to you, for good luck.”

我爸让我少看手机，多陪他们说说话，我立刻放下手机，给他捶捶背，说“爸，辛苦了”。
My dad asked me to spend less time on my phone and more time talking with them, so I immediately put down my phone, massaged his back, and said, “Dad, you’ve worked hard.”

全程没有一句争吵，我妈甚至私下和亲戚说，我女儿今年回来，好像变懂事了，也变温柔了。
The whole time, there were no words of argument. Even my mom privately told relatives that this year when my daughter came back, she seemed to have become more sensible and gentle.

年三十晚上，临睡前，我妈来我房间，给我盖被子，突然很小声地说了一句，“囡囡，你在外面一个人，也不容易，别太累了。”
On New Year’s Eve, just before going to sleep, my mom came into my room to cover me with a blanket. She suddenly whispered very softly, “Nan Nan, it’s not easy for you to be alone outside, don’t get too tired.”

姐，你知道吗，就为了这句话，我躲在被子里，哭得像个傻子。
Sister, do you know what, just for that sentence, I hid under the blanket and cried like an idiot.

我终于明白，我以前所有那些带着戾气的对抗，其实只是为了听到这句话。
I finally understand that all those confrontations filled with hostility I had before were actually just for hearing this sentence.

当我不再去“要”的时候，它反而自己来了。
When I stopped trying to “get” it, it came to me on its own.

谢谢你，姐。是你给了我一把，打开家门的，真正的钥匙。
Thank you, sister. It was you who gave me the real key to open the door to home.

我看着她的留言，心里很暖。
I looked at her message, and my heart felt warm.

其实，哪有什么真正的魔鬼呢？
Actually, are there really any true devils?

所谓的戾气，不过是爱和痛苦纠缠在一起，表达不出来的样子。
What is called ill-temper is merely the entanglement of love and pain, an expression that cannot be articulated.

我们与父母的和解，本质上，是我们与那个曾经弱小、不被理解、渴望被爱的童年自己的和解。
Our reconciliation with our parents, in essence, is our reconciliation with that once weak, misunderstood, and yearning-for-love childhood self.

当你强大到可以自己拥抱自己时，你才有余力，去拥抱那两位，同样在命运中，步履蹒跚的，你的父母。
Only when you are strong enough to embrace yourself can you have the strength to embrace those two, your parents, who are also stumbling through life’s journey.

这，就是成长。
This is growth.

声明：本文来自《一凡日记》专栏
Statement: This article is from the column “Yifan Diary”

文章时常被删屏蔽，如有收获，可在评论区获取本篇《一凡日记》5000字PDF版
The article is often deleted or censored. If you gain something, you can get the 5000-word PDF version of this “Yifan Diary” in the comments.

我是一凡，长青盟创始人、源头日记合伙人
I am Wei Fan, founder of the Evergreen Alliance and partner of Source Diary.

长青盟，是专为成长型女性打造的终身成长社群。
Evergreen Alliance is a lifelong growth community created specifically for growth-oriented women.

我们不止是一个社群，更是一个深度融合了「私域电商」x「知识付费」x「自媒体赋能」的完整成长生态。
It is not just a community, but a complete growth ecosystem that deeply integrates ‘private domain e-commerce’ x ‘knowledge payment’ x ‘influencer empowerment’.

我们陪伴你，以品质健康生活为基石，以精神富足为内核，最终成长为能够持续盈利的超级个体。
We accompany you, with quality and healthy living as the foundation, spiritual fulfillment as the core, ultimately growing into a super individual capable of sustainable profitability.

文官地主集团，主动选择了满清 2026-01-07 阅读需要15分钟 不知道大家看清宫剧，或者是读明清历史的时候，脑子里有没有蹦出过这么一个巨大的问号，明明汉族上亿人，为什么会被八旗统治着。
The Weng Guan Landlord Group, proactively chose the Manchu 2026-01-07 Reading time needed: 15 minutes I wonder if everyone has had this huge question pop into their heads while watching palace dramas or reading the history of the Ming and Qing dynasties: Why were hundreds of millions of Han Chinese ruled by the Eight Banners.

要知道，当年的满清八旗，满打满算，连带家属和包衣奴才，撑死了也就二十多万人。真正能提刀上马打仗的兵力，不过十万左右。
To know, the Manchu Eight Banners of that time, including family members and household servants, could not have exceeded two hundred thousand at most. The actual fighting force that could wield swords and ride into battle was only around one hundred thousand.

而当时的大明朝呢，哪怕是到了崇祯殉国的那一刻，汉人的数量也是按亿来计算的。光是正规军和各地的武装力量加起来，少说也有几百万。
As for the Great Ming Dynasty at that time, even by the time Chongzhen died, the number of Han people was still counted in billions. Just the regular army and armed forces in various regions combined, were no less than several million.

十万对一亿，最后还占据了汉人的天下，这不仅是以少胜多的问题了，这简直就是蚂蚁吞了大象，是人类战争史上极其罕见的蛇吞象奇迹。
One hundred thousand against one billion, yet they ended up occupying the realm of the Han people. This is not just a matter of outnumbering the enemy; it’s like an ant devouring an elephant, an extremely rare “snake devouring an elephant” miracle in the history of human warfare.

这就好比现在，随便来个不知名的小岛国，派了几条渔船，就把一个超级大国给全境占领了，你敢信吗。
This is like now, if an unknown small island nation sends over a few fishing boats and manages to occupy an entire superpower, would you believe it?

如果光看教科书上说的什么八旗骑射无敌，明朝腐败无能，根本解释不了这种体量上的绝对悬殊。真正的真相，其实藏在人性最幽暗的那个角落里，残酷得，让你脊梁骨发凉。
If one just looks at the textbook claims about the Manchu Eight Banners being invincible horse archers and the Ming Dynasty being corrupt and incompetent, it simply cannot explain the absolute and massive disparity in scale. The true truth actually lies in the darkest corner of human nature, so cruel that it chills your spine.

今天，咱们就抛开那些被粉饰过的陈词滥调，把这层窗户纸捅破，告诉你一个颠覆认知的结论，满清之所以能入主中原，统治汉人近三百年，根本不是因为他们有多强。
Today, let’s set aside those embellished clichés and tear away this veil of hypocrisy, revealing a subversive conclusion: the Manchus were able to conquer the Central Plains and rule the Han Chinese for nearly three hundred years, not because they were particularly strong.

而是因为大明朝内部，那个掌握了话语权和财富的文官地主集团，在那个历史的十字路口之际，为了保住自己的荣华富贵，经过精算之后，主动选择了他们。
But rather because within the Great Ming Dynasty, that literati landlord group that controlled the discourse and wealth, at the crossroads of history, chose them after careful calculation to preserve their own prosperity.

没错，这是一场彻头彻尾的双向奔赴，更是一场大明精英阶层对国家和民族的集体出卖。只可惜，这帮自以为聪明的带路党，最后却算错了账，把自己的尊严和脊梁，也一并赔了个精光。
No, this was a complete two-way arrangement, and more so, a collective betrayal of the nation and people by the elite class of the Ming Dynasty. Unfortunately, these self-proclaimed clever guides ultimately miscalculated, losing their dignity and backbone along with it.

咱们先把时间轴拨回到明朝末年，看看当时到底发生了什么。很多人觉得明朝亡于崇祯，亡于天灾，亡于李自成。这都是表象。
Let’s first rewind the timeline to the late Ming Dynasty and see what actually happened back then. Many people think the Ming Dynasty fell because of Chongzhen, because of natural disasters, or because of Li Zicheng. These are all surface-level observations.

大明真正的死因，其实是死于一种名为不与民争利的慢性毒药。这六个字听起来是不是特别耳熟，是不是特别正义，但这却是明朝文官集团最大的谎言。
The true cause of the Ming Dynasty’s demise was actually a chronic poison called “not competing with the people for profit.” These six characters sound very familiar, don’t they? They sound very just, but this was the biggest lie of the Ming Dynasty’s civil servant group.

在他们的逻辑里，皇帝想收商业税，想开海禁，那就是与民争利，就是昏君。可他们口中的民，根本不是咱们这种面朝黄土背朝天的老百姓，而是他们自己，那些家中良田万顷，海船成队，富可敌国的士大夫和豪强地主。
In their logic, if the emperor wanted to collect commercial taxes or lift the maritime ban, that was competing with the people for profit, and it meant the emperor was incompetent. But the “people” they referred to were not the common folk like us, who toil the land from dawn till dusk, but rather themselves—those scholar-officials and wealthy landowners with vast fields, fleets of ships, and wealth that rivaled the state.

明朝中后期，出现了一个极其魔幻的现象，国家穷得叮当响，崇祯皇帝穿的龙袍都打补丁，为了几万两银子的军费急得一夜白头。
In the middle and later periods of the Ming Dynasty, an extremely surreal phenomenon emerged. The country was practically bankrupt, to the point where Emperor Chongzhen’s dragon robes had patches, and he was driven to premature baldness over the urgent need for a few tens of thousands of taels of silver for military expenses.

而江南的秦淮河畔，那是灯红酒绿，纸醉金迷，盐商和官僚们一顿饭就能吃掉边关将士半年的口粮。
And along the Qinhuai River in Jiangnan, it was a scene of dazzling lights and red wine, paper and gold intoxication, where a single meal for salt merchants and officials could consume half a year’s rations of border soldiers.

为什么会这样，因为文官集团利用手中的权力，构建了一个坚不可摧的避税天堂。他们通过优免权，让大量的土地不用交税，他们阻挠朝廷收商税，导致明朝的财政重担，全部压在了最底层的农民身上。
Why was this the case? Because the civil servant group, using the power in their hands, had built an invincible tax haven. Through exemptions, they allowed vast amounts of land to be tax-exempt, and they obstructed the imperial court from collecting merchant taxes, placing the entire financial burden of the Ming Dynasty on the lowest-level farmers.

这就导致了一个死循环，越有钱的人越不用交税，越穷的人交的税越多。最后农民实在活不下去了，只能造反，李自成就这么被逼出来了。
This created a vicious cycle, where the richer you were, the less tax you paid, and the poorer you were, the more tax you paid. Eventually, the farmers could no longer survive and had no choice but to rebel, and Li Zicheng was thus forced into this path.

这时候，摆在明朝文官地主集团面前的，其实有三个选择。
At this point, before the Ming Dynasty’s civil servant landlord group, there were actually three choices.

第一，是跟着崇祯皇帝死磕，捐出家产，整顿军备，一致对外。但这个选项第一时间就被他们排除了。为什么，因为在他们看来，大明是皇帝的大明，钱却是自己的钱。
First, it was to go all-out with the Chongzhen Emperor, donate personal assets, and revitalize military preparedness, uniting against external threats. But this option was immediately ruled out. Why, because in their view, the Great Ming belonged to the emperor, but the money was their own.

崇祯求爷爷告奶奶让他们捐款助饷，结果呢，一个个影帝附体，有的在自家门口贴此房出售，有的穿个破衣服上朝哭穷，最后首辅魏藻德这种级别的也就捐了几百两，打发叫花子呢。
Chongzhen begged them to donate funds to support the war effort, but the result was that they all played the part of movie stars, some putting up “this house for sale” signs at their own gates, while others came to court in tattered clothes, crying poverty. In the end, even high-ranking officials like Wei Zao-de only donated a few hundred taels, which was barely enough to feed a beggar.

他们心里算盘打得精着呢，只要我的钱还在，地还在，换个皇帝又如何，大不了以后给新朝廷打工嘛。
Their calculations were meticulous: as long as their money and land remained, it didn’t matter who the emperor was—what happened was that they would just work for the new government in the future.

所以，当李自成攻破北京城的时候，这帮文官们大多是抱着喜迎王师的心态的，他们以为李自成会像历代开国皇帝一样，需要他们这帮读书人来治理天下，那他们的荣华富贵就能延续下去。
So, when Li Zicheng broke into Beijing, these officials mostly welcomed the new regime with open arms, believing that Li Zicheng would, like past founding emperors, need them, the scholars, to govern the world. And in that way, their wealth and status could continue.

可是，历史在这里跟他们开了一个天大的玩笑。李自成不是刘邦，也不是朱元璋，他是真正的泥腿子出身，他对这帮贪官污吏，土豪劣绅有着刻骨铭心的仇恨。
But history played a huge trick on them here. Li Zicheng was not Liu Bang, nor was he Zhu Yuanzhang; he was truly from the mud-clogs, the common people, and he harbored a deep-seated hatred for these corrupt officials and wealthy, unscrupulous gentry.

李自成进京后，并没有像文官们期待的那样搞礼贤下士，而是搞了一场惨烈的追赃助饷。说白了就是，你们不是说没钱吗，行，给我打。
After Li Zicheng entered the capital, he did not, as the literati had expected, show respect for the talented and virtuous, but instead launched a brutal campaign to 追赃助饷. To put it bluntly, you all said you had no money, well, then give me some.

刘宗敏带着农民军，那是真下死手啊，夹棍，烙铁全用上了。这帮平日里养尊处优的文官地主，几天之内就被榨出了七千万两白银。七千万两啊。
Liu Zongmin, leading the peasant army, really went all out; they used torture like the jiagun (wooden clamps) and laotie (iron brands). These literati and landlords, who had been living in luxury all their lives, were squeezed out of 70 million taels of silver within days. 70 million taels!

崇祯要是早有这笔钱，大明何至于亡，这一顿暴打，直接把文官地主集团给打醒了，也打怕了。
If Chongzhen had had this money earlier, the Ming Dynasty would not have fallen. This brutal crackdown directly woke up and terrified the literati and landlord group.

他们突然意识到，李自成代表的是最底层的农民利益，是要均田免赋的，这不仅是要他们的钱，更是要掘他们的根。在他们眼里，李自成就是洪水猛兽，是绝对不能共存的流寇。
They suddenly realized that Li Zicheng represented the interests of the lowest-class peasants, seeking equal land distribution and tax exemption. This was not just about their money, but about digging into their roots. In their eyes, Li Zicheng was a flood and a 猛兽, an absolutely incompatable bandit.

也就是在这个生死存亡的关头，北方的边境线上，那个本来被视为蛮夷的满清八旗，突然在文官地主们的眼里变得眉清目秀起来。
At this critical juncture of life and death, on the northern frontier, the Manchu Eight Banners, who were originally seen as barbarians, suddenly appeared refined in the eyes of the literati and landlords.

为什么，因为阶级利益。大家仔细琢磨琢磨，满清虽然是异族，虽然他们杀人如麻，但他们当时的社会结构是奴隶制向封建制过渡，他们极其看重等级，看重秩序。
Why? Because of class interests. Think carefully, although the Manchus were a foreign ethnicity and had killed indiscriminately, their social structure at the time was transitioning from slavery to feudalism. They placed great emphasis on hierarchy and order.

对于明朝的文官地主来说，满清要的是江山，要的是当皇帝，而要想坐稳江山，满清就必须依赖汉族的精英阶层来治理，就必须承认地主阶级的土地所有权。
For the literati and landlords of the Ming Dynasty, the Manchus wanted the empire and the throne. To secure their rule, the Manchus had to rely on the elite Han Chinese class for governance and had to recognize the land ownership of the landlord class.

说得更直白点，满清是懂规矩的，是可以谈生意的，而李自成是掀桌子的，是要命的。
More bluntly, the Manchus knew the rules and were willing to do business, while Li Zicheng was a table-flipper, deadly serious.

于是，一个人类历史上最无耻，也最荒诞的决定诞生了。
Thus, the most shameless and absurd decision in human history was born.

以吴三桂为代表的辽东军阀，以及他背后庞大的北方士绅集团，迅速达成了一种默契，引清兵入关，借师助剿。
The Liaodong warlords, represented by Wu Sangui, and the vast northern gentry group behind him quickly reached a tacit understanding, inviting the Qing army to enter the pass and ask for help to suppress the rebellion.

你们注意，这绝不仅仅是吴三桂为了陈圆圆冲冠一怒那么简单，那是小说家的谎言。真正的推手，是整个北方地主阶级对李自成政权的极度恐惧。
Notice, this was far more than just Wu Sangui’s rage over Chen Yuanyuan; that’s a novelist’s lie. The real driving force was the extreme fear of the entire northern landlord class towards Li Zicheng’s regime.

他们宁愿把花花江山拱手送给异族，宁愿让华夏神器易主，也不能容忍泥腿子骑在他们头上拉屎。
They would rather hand over their splendid 江山 to alien races, allow the Chinese artifacts to fall into the hands of others, than tolerate the mud-footed people riding them and defecating on their heads.

在他们看来，满清来了，最多就是换个老板，他们还是股东，还是高管，甚至因为有拥立之功，还能赚得更多。
In their eyes, the Manchus coming was at most just changing the boss, they were still shareholders, still executives, and even because of their meritorious role in enthroning them, they could earn even more.

这就是为什么清军入关时，打出的旗号是为崇祯皇帝发丧，剿灭流寇，这口号简直是精准击中了汉族士大夫的G点，给了他们一个完美的投降台阶，你看，我不是卖国，我是为君父报仇啊。
This is why when the Qing army entered the pass, their banner was to mourn the Ming Emperor Chongzhen, suppress the bandits, this slogan was perfectly aimed at the G-spot of the Han Chinese scholars, giving them a perfect surrender platform, see, I am not selling out, I am avenging my sovereign and father.

接下来的事情，大家就都知道了。清军入关，势如破竹。为什么这么顺，是因为八旗兵真的有三头六臂吗，当然不是。是因为大明的整个官僚系统，整个地主阶级，都在主动配合他们。
The next thing, everyone knows. The Qing army entered the pass, like a broken bamboo. Why was it so smooth, was it because the Eight Banners soldiers really had three heads and six arms, of course not. It was because the entire bureaucratic system of the Great Ming, the entire landlord class, were actively cooperating with them.

南明为什么守不住，史可法在扬州死守，可南京的那些勋贵和大臣们在干什么，在忙着内斗，在忙着准备降表，在忙着给清军开城门。
Why couldn’t the Southern Ming hold on, when Shi Kefa was holding out in Yangzhou? What were the nobles and ministers in Nanjing doing? They were busy infighting, busy preparing surrender documents, busy opening the city gates for the Qing army.

在江南各地，很多地方清军还没到，当地的士绅就已经把顺民的旗子挂出来了。
In various places across Jiangnan, before the Qing army even arrived, local gentry had already hung the flags of the 顺民 (surrendered people).

因为他们天真地以为，只要我跪得够快，只要我配合得够好，满清主子就会像当年的蒙古人或者其他征服者一样，只要收点税就完了，依然会让他们在地方上作威作福，继续过那刑不上大夫的好日子。
Because they naively believed that as long as they kneeled quickly enough, as long as they cooperated sufficiently, the Qing masters would treat them like the Mongols or other conquerors of the past—just collect some taxes and be done with it, allowing them to continue ruling with impunity in the localities and living their days of “the law does not apply to the noble class.”

他们把满清当成了一个可以利用的雇佣兵，想利用满清来镇压农民起义，以此维护自己的阶级统治。
They regarded the Qing as a useful mercenary force, intending to use them to suppress peasant uprisings and thereby maintain their class rule.

但是，这帮精明了一辈子的文官地主，千算万算，唯独算漏了一点，满清八旗，不是来当雇佣兵的，也不是来当共治天下的合作伙伴的，他们是来当主子的。
But, these literati and landlord who had been cunning all their lives, despite all their calculations, had overlooked one crucial point: the Manchu Eight Banners were not here to be mercenaries, nor were they here to be partners in governing the world together; they were here to be the masters.

多尔衮和后来的康熙，乾隆，那都是政治手段极其老辣的猎手。当清军站稳脚跟，消灭了李自成和南明的正规军之后，他们立刻撕下了温情脉脉的面具，露出了獠牙。
Dorgon and later Kangxi and Qianlong were all hunters with extremely shrewd political tactics. Once the Qing army had established its footing and had defeated the regular armies of Li Zicheng and the Southern Ming, they immediately tore off their facade of warmth and revealed their fangs.

第一刀，就是剃发易服。这不仅仅是换个发型那么简单，这是对汉族士大夫精神脊梁的彻底打断。在儒家文化里，身体发肤，受之父母，剃头就是不孝，就是去中国化。
The first blow was the shaving of heads and changing of attire. This was not just about changing hairstyles; it was a complete breakdown of the spiritual backbone of the Han Chinese scholar-officials. In Confucian culture, the body and its hair were given by one’s parents, and shaving one’s head was considered disloyal to one’s parents and a denationalization of China.

满清就是要通过这种极具侮辱性的方式，来测试你的服从度，来确立征服者的绝对权威。这下子，那些原本以为可以马照跑，舞照跳的文官地主们傻眼了。
The Manchus intended to use this highly insulting method to test your level of obedience and to establish the absolute authority of the conquerors. Now, those literati and landlords who had originally thought they could continue running horses and dancing as usual were taken aback.

他们没想到，投降的代价竟然是连祖宗的衣冠都保不住。这时候，江南的士绅们才开始反抗，才有了嘉定三屠，扬州十日。但可惜，晚了，一切都太晚了。
They never expected that the price of surrender would be losing even the ancestral robes. At this point, the gentry in Jiangnan began to resist, which led to the Jiading Massacre and the Yangzhou Ten Days. But unfortunately, it was too late, everything was too late.

当你们手里有枪，有权，有钱的时候，你们选择了投降，现在刀架在脖子上，你们再想反抗，那就是待宰的羔羊。
When you had guns, power, and money in your hands, you chose to surrender. Now that the knife is at your neck, if you want to resist, you are just a lamb waiting to be slaughtered.

第二刀是圈地投充。满清入关后，为了安抚八旗子弟，在北方大肆圈占汉人的土地。那些曾经以为引狼入室可以保住家产的地主们，惊恐地发现，自己的土地直接被旗人圈走了，自己甚至被强行划为包衣。
The second knife was land enclosure and forced enrollment. After the Manchus entered the capital, to pacify the Bannermen, they extensively encroached upon the land of the Han people in the north. Those landlords who once thought that inviting the wolf into the house could save their property were horrified to discover that their land was directly encroached upon by the Bannermen, and they were even forcibly classified as bondsmen.

原本以为是换个老板继续当高管，结果直接变成了没有人格尊严的家奴。这对于心高气傲的士大夫阶层来说，简直是比死还难受的羞辱。但是，枪杆子在人家手里，你敢说个不字吗？
What was originally thought to be changing bosses and continuing as high-level executives turned directly into a lackey without human dignity. This was simply more humiliating than death for the proud scholar-official class. But with the gun in someone else’s hands, dare you say a word of refusal?

第三刀，是文字狱和奴化教育。明朝的文官虽然贪，但至少骨子里还有点士大夫与君王共治天下的傲气，皇帝不对那是真敢骂。
The third blade is the literary inquisition and slave-like education. Although the officials of the Ming Dynasty were corrupt, they still had some arrogance in their bones as scholars who shared governance with the king. If the emperor was wrong, they were truly daring to curse him.

但到了清朝，皇权被无限放大，大臣自称奴才。满清通过残酷的文字狱，把汉族精英的思想彻底阉割了。你想谈论国事，你想指点江山，杀头，诛九族。
But by the Qing Dynasty, imperial power was 无限放大, and ministers called themselves slaves. The Manchus, through the brutal literary inquisition, completely emasculated the thoughts of the Han elite. If you wanted to discuss national affairs, if you wanted to guide the country, you would be executed, and your entire family would be punished.

慢慢地，那个曾经拥有风骨，拥有思想的士大夫阶层不见了，取而代之的是一群唯唯诺诺，只知道磕头听话的奴才官僚。
Gradually, the scholar-official class that once possessed integrity and thought disappeared, replaced by a group of obsequious officials who only knew how to kowtow and obey.

所以，回顾这段历史，我们必须得承认一个极其扎心的事实，八旗之所以能统治上亿汉人，不是因为他们的马蹄铁更硬，而是因为明朝的精英阶层，在国家民族大义和个人阶级私利之间，毫不犹豫地选择了后者。
Therefore, looking back at this history, we must admit an extremely painful fact. The reason the Eight Banners were able to rule over hundreds of millions of Han people was not because their horseshoes were harder, but because the elite class of the Ming Dynasty, between the greater good of the nation and personal class interests, unhesitatingly chose the latter.

他们以为自己是在做一笔划算的政治投资，以为可以利用满清这把刀来杀那些造反的穷鬼，结果没想到，这把刀最后架在了自己的脖子上。
They thought they were making a profitable political investment, believing they could use the Qing dynasty as a tool to eliminate the rebellious poor, but they never expected that the blade would end up on their own necks.

他们背叛了崇祯，背叛了李自成，背叛了底层的汉人同胞，最后换来的是什么，是长达三百年的猪尾巴，是膝盖生根的奴性，是华夏文明的一次重大倒退。
They betrayed Chongzhen, betrayed Li Zicheng, betrayed their fellow Han people at the bottom, and what did they ultimately get in return? Three hundred years of being like pigs’ tails, a servility rooted in their knees, a major regression for Chinese civilization.

这就像是一个公司的管理层，为了不让底层的员工涨工资，为了保住自己的高额分红，竟然主动引进了竞争对手来收购公司。他们以为新老板会感激他们，会给他们保留股份。
This is like a company’s management team, trying to prevent lower-level employees from getting raises and wanting to keep their high dividends, actually actively inviting a competitor to acquire the company. They thought the new owner would be grateful to them and keep them as shareholders.

结果新老板进门第一件事，就是把这帮管理层全部降级为清洁工，还要逼着他们穿上耻辱的制服，每天如果不磕头就要挨鞭子。这时候他们再想念前任老板的好，再想念公司自主经营的尊严，还有用吗。
The result was that the new owner’s first act upon entering was to demote the entire management team to janitors, forcing them to wear humiliating uniforms and beat them with whips if they didn’t kowtow every day. At this point, would it still matter if they missed the former owner’s kindness or the dignity of the company operating independently?

没用了，公司已经改姓了，核心技术没了，市场没了，脊梁骨断了，连做人的尊严也都没了。
No use anymore, the company has changed its name, core technology is gone, market is gone, spine is broken, even the dignity of being human is gone.

明朝的灭亡，绝不仅仅是军事上的失败，更是一次典型的精英阶层这种集体性的道德沦丧和战略误判。
The fall of the Ming Dynasty was not just a military failure, but a typical case of collective moral decline and strategic miscalculation among the elite class.

这些读圣贤书的人，书都读到了狗肚子里。他们只看到了眼前的金银财宝，只看到了自家的一亩三分地，却看不懂皮之不存，毛将焉附的道理。
These people who read the classics, have their knowledge digested by dogs. They only see the gold and silver treasures in front of them, only see their own small patch of land, but they don’t understand the principle of “when the skin is gone, where will the hair attach.”

他们不懂得，一个阶层的尊严和利益，是依附于国家和民族的独立之上的。当国家沦为异族的猎场，当你的人民沦为待宰的牲口时，你这个所谓的精英，又能高贵到哪里去。
They don’t understand that the dignity and interests of a class depend on the independence of the nation and the ethnicity. When the country becomes a hunting ground for foreign races, when your people become livestock waiting to be slaughtered, where can your so-called elite go to be noble.

在满清主子眼里，你不过是一条好用的狗，甚至是一条随时可以下锅的狗。
In the eyes of the Manchu masters, you are no more than a useful dog, or even a dog that can be put on the pot at any time.

更讽刺的是，这帮文官地主集团，在明朝的时候，为了对抗皇权，那是各种手段无所不用其极，把皇帝防得像贼一样，内阁权力大得没边。
More ironically, this group of literati and landlord faction, during the Ming Dynasty, used every means to oppose the imperial power, treating the emperor like a thief and giving the Grand Secretariat immense power.

结果到了清朝，面对异族的铁腕统治，他们反而变得无比温顺，无比听话。乾隆皇帝下江南，那些汉族官员跪在路边，那个谄媚劲儿，连满人都看不起。
But when it came to the Qing Dynasty, facing the iron-fisted rule of a foreign ethnic group, they became incredibly docile and obedient. When Emperor Qianlong traveled south, those Han officials kowtowed on the roadside, so servile that even the Manchus looked down on them.

这说明了什么，说明这帮人的骨头是软的，他们只敢欺负讲规矩的文明人，一旦遇到不讲理的野蛮人，他们就立刻跪得五体投地。这是一种典型的欺软怕硬的奴才心理。
What does this show? It shows that these people have soft bones. They dare to bully those who follow rules and are civilized, but when they encounter unreasonable barbarians, they immediately kowtow with all their might. This is a typical example of a servile mentality that fears the weak and submits to the strong.

我们今天复盘这段历史，不是为了去宣扬什么狭隘的民族仇恨，毕竟满汉一家亲已经是现在的共识。
We review this history today not to promote narrow ethnic hatred, after all, the unity of Manchu and Han is now a common consensus.

我们要反思的，是那个亘古不变的历史教训，一个国家的精英阶层，如果失去了家国情怀，如果把个人利益凌驾于国家利益之上，如果为了私利可以出卖原则和底线，那么最终的结局，一定是毁灭。
What we need to reflect on is the timeless lesson of history: if the elite of a nation lose their sense of patriotism, place personal interests above national interests, or sacrifice principles and 底线 for private gain, the ultimate outcome will inevitably be destruction.

不仅仅是国家的毁灭，更是他们自己的毁灭。明末的那些地主豪强们，以为自己很聪明，以为自己是那个时代的操盘手，殊不知，在历史的洪流面前，在野蛮的暴力面前，他们的小聪明不仅可笑，而且可悲。
Not just the destruction of the nation, but also their own destruction. The landlords and powerful figures at the end of the Ming Dynasty thought they were very smart, believed they were the masters of their time, but they didn’t realize that in the face of historical currents and brutal violence, their petty cleverness was not only laughable but also tragic.

他们亲手给自己的子孙后代套上了枷锁，亲手把那个曾经辉煌灿烂的文明推向了深渊。
They personally shackled their descendants and pushed a once brilliant and splendid civilization into the abyss.

八旗入关，是历史的偶然，也是必然。偶然的是那个时间点，必然的是当一个王朝的内部不仅腐烂，而且发生了严重的阶级背叛时，任何外来的推力，哪怕只有区区十几万人，都足以推倒那座看似宏伟却早已中空的大厦。
The Manchu Eight Banners entering the pass was both a historical accident and an inevitability. The accident was the specific time point, while the inevitability was that when the internal decay of a dynasty had not only set in but also involved severe class betrayal, any external force, even as small as a mere hundred thousand people, was enough to topple that seemingly grand but long hollowed-out structure.

这不仅仅是明朝的悲剧，更是所有精致利己主义者的墓志铭。
This is not just the tragedy of the Ming Dynasty, but also the epitaph for all selfish utilitarians.

所以，别再被那些八旗满万不可敌的神话给忽悠了。真正无敌的，从来不是敌人的铁骑，而是我们内部的团结和信仰。
So, stop being fooled by those myths about the Manchu Eight Banners being invincible when their numbers reach ten thousand. What is truly invincible has never been the enemy’s cavalry, but rather our internal unity and faith.

当上亿人同心协力的时候，什么八旗，什么坚船利炮，都不过是纸老虎。但当上亿人被一小撮自私的精英出卖，分化，瓦解的时候，哪怕是区区几万人的蛮族武装，也能成为骑在我们头上的太上皇。
When hundreds of millions of people work together in unity, what matter the Eight Banners, what matter the advanced warships and cannons, are all just paper tigers. But when hundreds of millions of people are betrayed, divided, and disintegrated by a handful of selfish elites, even a small tribal army of just tens of thousands can become the absolute monarch sitting atop our heads.

这！才是那段血腥历史留给我们，最痛，也最深刻的领悟。
This! Is the most painful and profound lesson left to us by that bloody history.

为几近了、别乱折腾 2026-01-05 阅读需要12分钟 危机近了、这五年之内。收好你的现金。记住。不是现金流。是现金。或者实物贵金属也行。黄金白银之类。总感觉美股要蹦。全世界股市崩盘。感觉中美达成协议似的。美股崩盘。美国他们抄底慢慢带动复苏。我们崩盘、是把没价值的企业清理掉。地产股互联网的股票。还有一些僵尸企业没有造血和价值的企业。还有空手套白狼金融借款人贷款人。国内不出海就出局。比如某些企业海外建立了。可以在他们国家上市。比如空调和汽车。崩了。你在海外国家上股市。国内你就要退市。港股保留。总觉得商量好了。中美协议达成。中美股崩盘。中美划分世界。还有互联网也都蹦。当然港股没事。要接受内地资金监管。当然中美股崩盘我想这个想法多余的。还有不要认为美国虚弱。我们和美国还是有很大的差距。这个差距需要国内国际三十年经营。什么时候看到非洲南美5g网络和手机普及率华为有一定的市场份额。才算是复兴。毕竟微软电脑谷歌系统苹果手机。还在服务全世界呢。老美印钱。是因为有微软谷歌苹果MATe特斯拉亚马逊高通英特尔做背书呢。货币货币人家有这些产品货。美元还是有他国愿意要呢。又是第一大消费市场。我们货币就是华为背书。服务全球。赚回来带动就业。然后汇率我们升值达到国际国内循环计价标准。华为手机汽车和合作伙伴欧美日韩车。其他国产品牌不在中国市场。就是崩了不让你们存在了。只能在海外。市场中美瓜分。我们开发出非洲市场。让给老美。老美把东盟市场给中国就是华为订单。手机电脑汽车。政府办公企业办公。个人手机所有终端商品。有现金找正规渠道下载数字人民币钱包。一定找正规渠道下载、不知道可以搜索浏览查看抖音咨询是否真伪。为啥数字人民币钱包呢。因为我连银行也不信。总觉得银行看着是正规国家背书。实则是不是有猫腻谁知道？银行员工勾结把你信息透漏第三方。然后把你的钱撬走。回头找银行。他说是个人行为跟银行无关。零花钱小钱可以在W信、某宝可以。包括银行。不要放太多。不要陌生电话和各种链接。记住馅饼的事都是陷阱。不要网上听那种各种专家自媒体博主和主持跟财富有有关的言论。让他们在黑暗角落私下利益去博弈狗咬狗厮杀去吧。也不要乱投资。包括乱七八糟的汽车品牌和家电品牌包括互联网那些大佬雇佣得代言人让他们狗咬狗厮杀吧。内卷的本质就是不需要他们存在了。华为手机商城你要的都有了。华为在开发个APP股市三五个券商在加个基金平台够了。剩下就该团灭。不团灭的原因就是在哪里吸血收割。苹果手机为啥自带股市APP呢？汽车家电互联网要么出海要么自杀。没有其他选择。包括电商不需要了。你鞋厂可以去非洲呀。纺织厂可以东盟呀。他们赚了钱就购买高价值的中国产品。我们不就是就业了吗？鞋厂放到非洲和本地化55开合作。你就是非洲东盟国家级企业把那里当家园经营三五十年。学学人家欧美怎么在华经营的。过去稀缺经济你搞个鞋厂。你都可以称之为国家级企业。说实话我们国家央国企应该出海呀。不应该存在了。国家掌握国内金融资本国外央国企合作他国产业资本就行了。在这一点我们跟西方差远了，就知道掠夺收割国民。烟酒为啥不出海呢？有人说香烟税收多。狗屎玩意就是掠夺收割。为啥不让老外在华经营烟草行业？难道老外在华卖香烟不交税还是不带动国内就业？有危害直接重罚就行了。石油吧就算了。保护新能源。还有人说国家储备了3万亿美元储备。这个3万亿美元储备。过去是。现在不是了。因为我们有华为。另外这个3万亿美元储备。是私人财富。不是国家的。什么意思。就是说。是少数人的财富。是我们大多数的债务。是天庭在岗和欧美的结合体。是互联网的结合体。总资产几百万亿。国家资产三百多万亿。剩下几百万亿人民币就是美元储备3万多亿结合体。央国企说好听国家的或者说是政党组织的。跟国民没关系。难听的就是央国企是少数人在控制。想走私有化和资本主义化。不管什么化跟我们都没关系。这些央国企都是中央和地方诸侯私人的小金库。搞这地产和修路。少数人得利。债务我们承担就这么简单。中国美元储备3万亿是美国人债务。是我们的财富。过去是现在不是了。不信的话。我在讲个例子。都再说人民币国际化。怎么个国际化。讲了一大堆自媒体砖家和学者没有一个讲清楚的。产业开路。举例、我们过剩产能。不代表全世界过剩他们有需要。乱七八糟汽车品牌家电。到南非营商环境好一点。在哪里建立本地化55开合作的各种汽车厂和家电厂。带动就业。然后购买。赚了钱要么回流中国要么在股市收割他们、直接把话挑明。我收割你们国民。拿了钱给你们铺设各种基础设施。懂了吧。国内产能过剩和企业。还有玩具服装厂。叫债务。对南非来说是发展的财富。地产各种基建工程大桥。学我们。使劲反复操作储备了3万亿人民币。这个3万亿人民币计价就是地产工程大桥各种企业产业链还有互联网本地化结合体。如果他们政府、企业和个人都用上华为手机电脑。政府办公。企业办公。个人使用再好不过。那我就多照顾你一下，把有档次的企业欧菲光在哪里建厂。他们就996了。我们国人每天办公室对着电脑服务全球。每天上班四个小时。他们储备了3万亿人民币。明面是他们国家财富储备。私底下我们精英和他们掌握权利南非精英和社会精英的结合体。说句好听的合作共赢。难听的就是我们的殖民地。你这一对比。我们当下像不像欧美殖民地。所以3万亿美元储备是精英私人财富和欧美的结合体。我听说明面是3万亿美元储备。私底下不止哟。还不算海外的。地球正质最黑暗是那个地方？地球骗子集中地是那个地方。你们自己猜。我们走过30多年超过西方几百年。融入世界看着国民和学者在哪里自嗨。没有代价怎么可能呢？领袖和总理活过来会怎么看待当下？新一轮人工智能革命。也是人类最后一次这次革命不亚于改朝换代。古代死人推翻政权。现在是经济。所有积累的财富我就不说老外了。就说我们国内不管明面还是私下或者隐藏的或者黑暗的积累的财富都要洗牌。不管天庭、民间的还是个人都要为华为企业和他的伙伴做燃料。没有其他选择。哪些逃跑海外小鬼还是老油条携带的财富。20或者30年。所在国经济体饱和认知达不到也是燃料。肮脏积累财富到现在随着历史车轮的进程在新时代碾压面前都是新时代燃料。50年后回望今天你们肮脏积累的都是瞬间的辉煌。100年后。流血流泪的历史进程的绞肉机。200年后。后代看今天。肮脏动荡的封建主义朝代。有多少肮脏的人留下延续。说不定都没有了。对和错。我作为当代人我能猜到300年后对当今社会的评价。我们最淳朴的时代是开国领袖毛泽东时代。和当下华为创始人到基层的员工的时代。我觉得金融保险和券商应该让华为离职几千号人去从事和管理这个国家金融保险券商、当然了也听党指挥。而不是当下裙带关系搞小圈子反复横跳做妖在搞投机诈骗误导接盘反复收割国民榨干最后一滴油水。在讲讲农村的事未来农村房子和土地不值钱。对于少数人富有的人可以养老山清水秀。种地都是亏损的。不是种地不值钱。是你这个人不值钱。个体户种地除非承包几十亩上百的可以。城市的房子也不值钱。更廉价。有一点很好有各种服务。北上广深会贵点。但是也不值钱。但是不建议抱着投资心思去买。未来值钱的。知识。认知。技术。如果再有良好的家教。家教具备遵守规则和原则。这个血脉可以延续下去。如果没有。都是时代的绞肉机燃料。不管有钱没钱聪明的笨的丑的帅的都是时代燃料没有延续的可能包括我在内。14亿人。具备传承的。最多也就几百万。还是保守。少则一百万左右。高素质引领时代创造财富的人才。还不算欧美来华的人才几十万也包括日韩。其他都是时代燃料。个人具备知识、网络获取。认知是高纬度看穿底层社会和世界是怎样运行的社会和链接世界经济体。延迟欲望满足。或者经得起诱惑去奋斗积累自己财富。哪怕扫大街去要饭进工厂投资自己去获取知识。未来慢慢的富有。晚年不会活得太辛苦。这个社会就这么残酷。不信网上搜索看看底层农民工像不像和大街要饭孤寡老人。跟个诅咒轮回似的。生命没有价值。一生就是个燃料。思想固化木纳呆滞。当你送外卖跑滴滴、看到他们是不是老了的时候是一个影子？技术呢。包含生物医药芯片之类。计算机软件之类。具备这三样。想穷都穷不了。尤其是技术行业佼佼者。想创业自然会有各种有钱人大财阀拿钱排着队投资你。有钱人不管是男是女陪嫁陪娶带着资金和你结合结婚、如果有良好的家教再好不过更完美了。要懂得遵守规则和原则。就像犹太教家庭对子女教育那样。血脉和财富传承的。子女就能很好传承一代一代那样。你看抖音网络上。每个人都在自己的乌托邦找那种精神层次的。你浏览什么信息就是什么样的人进了脑袋这属于商增。说白了没有价值储存。别说脑容量。就是个电脑CPU缓存的垃圾都知道定期打理清楚。难道你比电脑的脑容量大？其实我也很痛苦。那种孤独只有认可的才能共鸣。人老了孤独就是我们正常社会状态。抱团都是没用的。在残酷竞争法则下。就是割断的。别说资本主义社会。社会主义也是一个样。社会就是淘汰你。不然怎么进步。孤独就是正常社会动态的经济体。印度抱团。伊朗抱团。有用吗？你看他们社会动态包括伊斯兰的。你看美国日本韩国。德国北欧法国社会动态经济体。法国黑人太多了。冲垮了本体民族。政治历史遗留问题。西方社会老人状态就是我们以后的状态。日本动态社会经济体就是我们的影子。人家多少还有保障。我们没有保障我们只是燃料。14亿人13亿都是燃料。承载这个国度也就4.5亿人。多了没有存在的价值。直接创造财富岗位就这么一两亿人养了一堆养不了太多。北边的荒无人烟。过去是我们的现在只能流口水。南边有一块大陆才两千多万人口。就看就看10年20年新一代天庭掌权者怎么操刀了。
Almost over, stop messing around 2026-01-05 Reading takes 12 minutes Crisis is near, within these five years. Save your cash. Remember. Not cash flow. Cash. Or physical precious metals are fine. Gold, silver, etc. Always feels like the US stock market is about to crash. Global stock market crash. Feels like an agreement between China and the US. US stock market crashes. They buy the bottom slowly and drive recovery. We crash, we clean up valueless companies. Real estate stocks, internet stocks. Some zombie companies without self-generation and value. And financial borrowers who loan without collateral. If you don’t go overseas, you’re out. Some companies have established overseas, they can list in their countries. Like air conditioners and cars. Crashed. You’re listed overseas, you have to delist in China. Hong Kong stocks are kept. Always feels like an agreement has been made. China-US agreement reached. China-US stock market crashes. China-US divides the world. And the internet also crashes. Of course, Hong Kong stocks are fine. They must accept mainland China’s regulatory oversight. Of course, I think the idea of a China-US stock market crash is redundant. And don’t think the US is weak. We still have a big gap with the US. This gap needs 30 years of domestic and international operation. Only when you see 5G networks and smartphone adoption rates in Africa and South America with Huawei having a certain market share can we call it a revival. After all, Microsoft computers, Google systems, Apple phones are still serving the world. The US prints money because they have Microsoft, Google, Apple, MATe, Tesla, Amazon, Qualcomm, Intel backing them. Money money, they have these products to trade. The US dollar is still wanted by other countries. It’s still the largest consumer market. Our currency is backed by Huawei, serving globally. Earned to drive employment. Then, we appreciate the exchange rate to reach international and domestic circulation pricing standards. Huawei phones, cars, and partner brands from Europe, America, Japan, and South Korea. Other domestic brands are not in the Chinese market. They’re crashed, not allowed to exist. Only overseas. The market is divided between China and the US. We develop the African market and give it to the US. The US gives the ASEAN market to China, which is Huawei orders. Phones, computers, cars. Government and corporate offices. Personal phones, all terminal goods. With cash, find official channels to download the digital RMB wallet. Must find official channels to download, if unsure, search, browse, check Douyin to verify authenticity. Why the digital RMB wallet? Because I don’t trust banks either. Always feels like banks look formal and are backed by the state, but who knows if there’s a catch? Bank employees collude to leak your information to third parties, then steal your money. Then, when you go back to the bank, they say it was a personal act and has nothing to do with the bank. Small change can be in WeChat, Alipay, including banks. Don’t keep too much. Don’t trust strangers or links. Remember, pies are traps. Don’t listen to various experts, self-media bloggers, and hosts online talking about wealth. Let them fight in dark corners for private interests. Don’t invest recklessly. Including messy car brands and home appliance brands, and internet giants’ hired spokespersons, let them fight. The essence of involution is that they no longer need to exist. Huawei phone stores, you’ll find everything you need. Huawei is developing an app, and three or five brokers add a fund platform, that’s enough. The rest should be wiped out. Not wiped out because there’s bloodsucking to be done. Why does the Apple iPhone come with a stock market app? Cars, home appliances, and the internet must either go overseas or commit suicide. No other choice. Including e-commerce is no longer needed. Your shoe factory can go to Africa. Your textile factory can go to ASEAN. They earn money and buy high-value Chinese products. Isn’t that employment? Put your shoe factory in Africa and cooperate locally, 55/45. You become a national-level enterprise in Africa or ASEAN, treating it as home and operating for 30-50 years. Learn how the Europeans and Americans operate in China. In the past, with scarce economies, you could call a shoe factory a national-level enterprise.Honestly, our national central and state-owned enterprises should go global. They shouldn’t exist anymore. The state should control domestic financial capital and cooperate with foreign central and state-owned enterprises and other countries’ industrial capital. In this regard, we are far behind the West; they only know how to exploit and harvest the people. Why aren’t cigarettes and alcohol going global? Some say cigarette taxes are high. That’s bullshit; it’s just exploitation and harvesting. Why not let foreigners operate the tobacco industry in China? Is it because foreigners don’t pay taxes when selling cigarettes in China, or because it doesn’t boost domestic employment? If it’s harmful, just punish it severely. As for oil, forget it. Protect new energy. Some people say the country has $3 trillion in reserves. This $3 trillion reserve was true in the past, but it’s not anymore because we have Huawei. Also, this $3 trillion reserve is private wealth, not national. What that means is it’s the wealth of a few, while it’s debt for the majority of us. It’s a combination of the working class in China and the elites in Europe and America. It’s a combination of the internet. The total assets are in the hundreds of trillion yuan. National assets are over 300 trillion yuan. The remaining hundreds of trillion yuan in RMB is a combination of the $3 trillion dollar reserve. State-owned enterprises, to put it nicely, are either national or, to put it bluntly, are controlled by a few people who want to privatize and turn them into capitalist entities. Whatever it is, it doesn’t concern us. These state-owned enterprises are private piggy banks for the central and local warlords. They engage in real estate and road construction, benefiting a few while we bear the debt. China’s $3 trillion in dollar reserves are American debt, which is our wealth. That was true in the past, but it’s not anymore. If you don’t believe me, let me give you an example. Everyone keeps talking about the internationalization of the RMB. How is it internationalized? A bunch of self-proclaimed experts and scholars haven’t explained it clearly. Industrial opening-up. For example, our excess capacity doesn’t mean the world has excess demand. All sorts of car brands and home appliances. Set up localized 50-50 cooperation factories for cars and home appliances in South Africa, where the business environment is better. Drive employment, then buy. Either bring the profits back to China or harvest them in the stock market. Let’s be clear: I’m harvesting your people. I’ll give you money to lay out various infrastructure. Get it? Domestic excess capacity and enterprises, as well as toy and clothing factories, are debt. For South Africa, they are wealth. Real estate, various infrastructure projects, bridges. Learn from us. Keep doing it repeatedly, accumulating $3 trillion in RMB. This $3 trillion in RMB is valued in real estate, infrastructure projects, bridges, various enterprises, industrial chains, and localized internet combinations. If their government, businesses, and individuals all use Huawei phones and computers, for government and business operations, and for personal use, it would be perfect. Then, I’ll give you some preferential treatment, like setting up factories for high-end companies like OFC. They’ll work 996. Our people sit in offices facing computers, serving the world. They work four hours a day. They have accumulated $3 trillion in RMB. On the surface, it’s their national wealth reserve. Privately, it’s a combination of our elite and their elite in South Africa, the social elite. To put it nicely, it’s cooperation and win-win. To put it bluntly, it’s our colony. Comparing this, doesn’t our current situation resemble that of European colonies? So, this $3 trillion in reserves is a combination of the elite’s private wealth and Europe and America. I hear that publicly, it’s a $3 trillion dollar reserve, but privately, it’s more than that. Not counting overseas assets. The darkest place on Earth? The place where con artists gather? You figure it out. We’ve gone through 30 years, surpassing the West by hundreds of years. Integrating into the world, watching our people and scholars get hyped up. Without a cost, how is that possible? If our leaders and prime ministers were to return, how would they view the current situation? The next artificial intelligence revolution is also the last one for humanity. This revolution is no less than a regime change. In the past, the dead overthrew regimes. Now, it’s about the economy. All accumulated wealth, I won’t mention foreigners, but domestic wealth, whether publicly, privately, hidden, or darkly accumulated, will be reshuffled.Regardless of the celestial court, the common folk, or individuals, they must all serve as fuel for Huawei and its partners. There is no other choice. Those who flee overseas, carrying wealth accumulated by old foxes, will still be fuel in 20 or 30 years. The economic saturation of the host country may not be able to reach the level of fuel. The dirty wealth accumulated over the years will still be crushed by the wheels of history in the new era. In 50 years, looking back at today, all the dirty wealth accumulated will be just a fleeting glory. In 100 years, the historical process of blood and tears will be a meat grinder. In 200 years, future generations will look back at today as a feudalistic era of dirty and turbulent times. How many dirty people will continue to exist? Perhaps there won’t be any left. Right or wrong. As a contemporary, I can guess how society will be evaluated in 300 years. Our most innocent era was the time of the founding leader Mao Zedong, and the era of the founder of Huawei to the grassroots employees. I think the financial insurance and securities industries should let thousands of Huawei employees leave to manage the country’s financial insurance and securities, of course, under the command of the Party. Instead of the current practice of using cronyism to form small circles, repeatedly shifting positions, engaging in speculation, fraud, misleading, and repeatedly harvesting the people, squeezing the last drop of their resources. Let me talk about rural affairs. In the future, rural houses and land will be worthless. For the few wealthy people, they can enjoy a life surrounded by mountains and clear waters. Farming will be a loss. It’s not that farming is worthless; it’s that you yourself are worthless. Individual farmers can only do it if they lease tens or hundreds of acres. Urban houses will also be worthless, even cheaper. There’s one good thing: various services. Beijing, Shanghai, Guangzhou, and Shenzhen will be a bit more expensive, but still not worth much. However, it is not recommended to buy them with an investment mindset. What will be valuable in the future is knowledge, cognition, and technology. If you also have good upbringing, which includes adhering to rules and principles, this bloodline can be passed down. Without it, you will all be fuel for the era’s meat grinder. Whether you are rich or poor, smart or foolish, ugly or handsome, you are all fuel of the era with no chance of continuity, including myself. 1.4 billion people. Those who can inherit are at most a few million. Still conservative, maybe around one million. High-quality individuals leading the era and creating wealth are not counted. There are also hundreds of thousands of talents from Europe and America who have come to China, as well as those from Japan and South Korea. The rest are all fuel of the era. Individuals with knowledge, the ability to acquire information through networks, and high-level cognition to see how the lower society and the world operate, and how to connect with the global economy. Delaying desires or resisting temptation to strive and accumulate wealth, even if it means sweeping streets, begging, or working in factories to acquire knowledge. Gradually becoming wealthy in the future, and not living a hard life in old age. This society is so cruel. If you don’t believe it, search online and see if the lower-class migrant workers are not like the homeless elderly on the streets. It’s like a curse in a cycle. Life has no value. A lifetime is just fuel. Fixed and dull thinking. When you deliver food or drive ride-hailing cars, and see them aging, are they just shadows? As for technology, including biomedicine, chips, and so on, as well as computer software. If you have these three, it will be hard to be poor. Especially for the top performers in the technology industry. If you want to start a business, naturally, there will be wealthy tycoons queuing up to invest in you. The rich, whether male or female, will marry you with funds, combining with you and marrying you. If you have good upbringing, it would be even better, making it perfect. You must understand the importance of adhering to rules and principles, just like the education in Jewish families. The bloodline and wealth inheritance can be passed down well from generation to generation. You see on Douyin and the internet, everyone is finding their own utopia at the spiritual level. The information you browse shapes the person you become. This is called cognitive enhancement. In short, without value storage. Forget about brain capacity. Even a computer CPU cache is known to need regular cleaning. Are you more capable than a computer’s brain capacity? In fact, I am also very painful. That kind of loneliness can only be understood by those who recognize it. As people age, loneliness is our normal social state. Clinging together is useless. Under the cruel rules of competition, it’s just a disconnection.Don’t even talk about capitalist societies. Socialism is the same. Society is about weeding you out. Otherwise, how can there be progress. Loneliness is the economic norm of social dynamics. India sticks together. Iran sticks together. Is it useful? Look at their social dynamics, including Islamic ones. Look at the United States, Japan, and South Korea. Germany, Nordic countries, and France’s social dynamics and economies. France has too many black people. It has collapsed the indigenous population. Political and historical legacy issues. The state of the elderly in Western society is what we will face in the future. Japan’s dynamic socio-economic system is our shadow. They still have some guarantees. We have none. We are just fuel. 1.4 billion people, 1.3 billion are fuel. Only 450 million can carry this nation. More than that has no value. Only a couple of hundred million people create wealth jobs. They support a bunch that can’t be supported. The north is desolate and uninhabited. In the past, it was ours. Now, we can only salivate. The south has a continent with over 20 million people. It depends on how the new generation of heavenly court rulers will handle it in the next 10 or 20 years.

你千万不能让“贫穷”成为习惯 2026-01-05 阅读需要1分钟 人千万不能习惯贫穷
You must never let “poverty” become a habit 2026-01-05 Reading takes 1 minute People must never get used to poverty

贫穷最危险的一刻，不是你身无分文的时候。
The most dangerous moment of poverty is not when you have no money.

而是你开始觉得“这样也行”的时候。
But when you start thinking “this will do.”

习惯贫穷，比贫穷本身可怕一万倍。
Getting used to poverty is a hundred times more frightening than poverty itself.

它会让你：
It will make you:

· 放弃规划，只求今天能活
· Give up planning, just want to survive today

· 拒绝机会，因为“我不配”
· Refuse opportunities, because “I’m not worthy”

· 嘲讽努力，说“都是命”
· Mock effort, saying “It’s all fate”

· 陷入“抱怨—认命—更穷”的死循环
· Fall into the “complain—accept fate—poorer” death cycle

当你习惯了廉价的食物、将就的生活、被忽视的尊严，你的眼界会变低，你的勇气会消失，你的可能性会被亲手掐灭。
When you get used to cheap food, settling for less in life, and being ignored, your perspective will narrow, your courage will fade, and your potential will be extinguished by your own hands.

贫穷会改变你的大脑结构——这不是比喻。
Poverty can change your brain structure—not as a metaphor.

研究表明，长期经济压力会损伤前额叶皮质，让你更难做出长远决策。你越习惯，就越难爬出来。
Research shows that long-term financial stress can damage the prefrontal cortex, making it harder for you to make long-term decisions. The more you get used to it, the harder it is to escape.

如何保持“不习惯”的清醒？
How can you maintain clarity and not get used to it?

1. 保留一个“不妥协”的角落
   Keep a “non-compromising” corner

哪怕住出租屋，也要保持整洁；哪怕收入低，也要有件得体的衣服。这不是虚荣，是告诉自己：“我值得更好的。”
Even if you live in a rental house, keep it tidy; even if your income is low, have a decent piece of clothing. This isn’t vanity; it’s telling yourself, “I deserve better.”

2. 每天做一件“未来有用”的事
   Do one “future useful” thing every day

读10页书、学一个技能、认识一个积极的人。这些事今天不会变现，但它们是你未来的梯子。
Read 10 pages of a book, learn a skill, meet an positive person. These things won’t pay off today, but they are the ladders for your future.

3. 定期接触“更好”
   Regularly expose yourself to the “better”

去好的商场逛逛，不是为消费，是为看见生活的另一种可能。去图书馆坐坐，感受知识环绕的氛围。让自己保持“不适感”，那是对现状的天然抗体。
Go to good shopping malls not for consumption, but to see another possibility of life. Sit in a library and feel the atmosphere surrounded by knowledge. Let yourself feel “discomfort,” that is the natural antibody to the current state.

贫穷可以是暂时的状态，绝不能成为永久的身份认同。
Poverty can be a temporary state, it can never become a permanent identity.

当你停止习惯，改变才会真正开始。
When you stop getting used to it, change will truly begin.

（如果这篇刺痛了你，说明你还没麻木。点赞收藏，下篇我们聊聊：月薪3000时，具体怎么做那三件事。）
If this stings you, it means you’re not numb yet. Like and save, next time we’ll talk about: When your monthly salary is 3,000, how to specifically do those three things.

残酷真相：前10%的人，拿走了68%的钱 #贫富差距 2026-01-06 阅读需要3分钟 最近身边不管是开滴滴的、坐办公室的，还是做小生意的，都在喊：“钱去哪了？” 大家明明都很努力，起早贪黑，可口袋就是鼓不起来。
The harsh truth: The top 10% of people take 68% of the money #Income Inequality 2026-01-06 Reading takes 3 minutes Recently, whether it’s those who drive ride-hailing, sit in offices, or run small businesses, they’re all shouting, “Where did the money go?” Everyone is clearly working hard, getting up early and staying up late, but their pockets just don’t seem to get fatter.

为了搞清楚这个问题，我没看那些虚头巴脑的新闻，直接去翻了最新的《安联全球财富报告2025》。 看完这组数据，我心里只有两个字：扎心。
To figure out this problem, I didn’t look at those pointless news articles; I went straight to the latest “Allianz Global Wealth Report 2025.” After seeing this set of data, there were only two words in my mind: hurtful.

二、 10个人吃饭，1个人端走7碗
II. When 10 people eat together, 1 person takes away 7 bowls

报告里有个数字特别吓人：在中国，最富的那10%的人，手里攥着全社会67.9%的钱。
A number in the report is particularly alarming: In China, the top 10% of the wealthiest people hold 67.9% of the entire society’s wealth.

这百分比看着不直观，我给你们打个最简单的比方：
This percentage may not seem 直观, so let me give you the simplest analogy:

咱们10个人凑一桌吃饭，桌上一共上了10碗红烧肉。 按理说，一人一碗，挺公平吧？ 现实是：那个最有钱的大哥，直接端走了7碗肉。 剩下我们9个人，拿着筷子，眼巴巴地去抢那剩下的3碗肉汤。
Imagine 10 of us gather for a meal, and there are 10 bowls of braised pork belly on the table. Logically, one bowl per person would be fair, right? In reality: the richest guy at the table takes 7 bowls of pork belly directly. The remaining 9 of us, holding chopsticks, are left eyeing the 3 bowls of pork soup left behind, desperate to grab them.

这就是现状。 不是肉不够吃，是分肉的方式变了。 那90%的人（也就是咱们普通老百姓），是在那点“残羹冷炙”里拼命内卷。 你抢到了，别人就饿着；别人抢到了，你就得喝风。
This is the current reality. It’s not that there isn’t enough meat to eat, but that the way the meat is divided has changed. The 90% of people (that is, us ordinary folks) are desperately competing over the “leftovers.” If you manage to snatch one, someone else goes hungry; if someone else snatches one, you’re left starving.

三、 钱生钱，比人干活快多了
III. Earning money from money is much faster than working for others

很多人想不通：我一天干12个小时，凭什么还不如别人收房租的？
Many people can’t understand: I work 12 hours a day, why can’t I earn more than others just by collecting rent?

这就是财经圈最不想告诉你的大实话：在这个阶段，靠力气赚钱，永远跑不过靠钱赚钱。
This is the biggest truth the finance circle never wants to tell you: at this stage, earning money through labor will always lag behind earning money through money.

那10%的富人，他们赚钱不靠上班。 他们的钱在房子里、在股票里、在公司股权里。哪怕他们在那睡觉，资产都在翻滚，都在利滚利。
That 10% of the rich don’t make money by working. Their money is in real estate, stocks, and company equity. Even if they are sleeping, their assets are rolling and compounding.

而咱们普通人呢？ 手停，口就停。 我们是在用两条腿跑，人家是在坐高铁。 这就叫“剪刀差”。时间越久，这把剪刀张得越大。
And what about us ordinary people? Stop working, stop eating. We are running on two legs, while they are taking the high-speed train. This is what they call the “scissor gap.” The longer the time, the wider this pair of scissors opens.

四、 普通老百姓，这几年该咋办？
IV. What should ordinary people do in these years?

话说得难听，但道理就是这个道理。 既然咱们没坐上那趟高铁，作为普通人，这几年我有三句掏心窝子的建议：
The words may sound harsh, but the truth is just like this. Since we didn’t get on that high-speed train, as ordinary people, I have three heartfelt suggestions for these years:

别乱借钱，别背大债 千万别为了面子去买豪车、换大房子。现在的环境，现金就是命。手里有粮，心里才不慌。如果你背了一身债，万一工作有个变动，那个大浪打过来，你是扛不住的。
Don’t borrow money recklessly, don’t accumulate large debts. Definitely don’t buy luxury cars or upgrade to bigger houses for the sake of face. In the current environment, cash is life. Have food in hand, and the mind will be at ease. If you are burdened with debts, and if there’s a change in your job, that big wave coming your way, you won’t be able to withstand it.

别做“一夜暴富”的梦 越是缺钱的时候，越容易被骗。什么高息理财、什么内幕消息炒股，大概率都是盯着你本金去的镰刀。 对于咱们普通人，不亏就是赚。 守住自己的钱袋子，别让富人再把你收割了。
Don’t dream of getting rich overnight. The poorer you are, the more easily you are deceived. High-interest financial products, insider stock tips—most of them are just scissors targeting your principal. For us ordinary people, not losing is already a win. Hold onto your money tightly, don’t let the rich harvest you again.

把身体养好，把手艺练好 钱会贬值，房子会老，但你的一身本事和好身体是谁也抢不走的。 哪怕去学个修车、做饭、理发，只要能解决具体问题，你就永远有口饭吃。
Take care of your body and master your skills Money depreciates, houses age, but your skills and good health are things no one can take away. Even if you learn to fix cars, cook, or cut hair, as long as you can solve practical problems, you’ll always have something to eat.

这世道，认清现实不丢人。 咱们成不了那10%的大富豪，没关系。 在这个折叠的时代，不盲目折腾，照顾好家人，踏踏实实过好自己的小日子，就是最大的本事。
In this world, recognizing reality is not shameful. If we can’t become that 10% of the wealthy, it’s okay. In this folded era, don’t blindly strive, take care of your family, and live your small life steadily—that is the greatest skill.

一百个顶级心态（2） 2025-12-20 阅读需要9分钟 一、 认知觉醒类心态
Top 100 Mindsets (2) 2025-12-20 Reading takes 9 minutes I. Mindsets of Cognitive Awakening

1. 归零心态：清空过往的成败标签，以全新姿态接纳新事物
   Zero-based mindset: Let go of past success and failure labels, embrace new things with a fresh attitude

2. 破壁心态：主动打破思维壁垒，不被固有认知束缚
   Breaking barriers mindset: Actively break through mental barriers, not being constrained by conventional thinking

3. 辩证心态：看待事物不极端，既看到利也能察觉弊
   Dialectical mindset: View things without extremes, seeing both the benefits and drawbacks

4. 空杯心态：放下优越感，始终保持谦逊的学习姿态
   Empty cup mindset: Put aside superiority, always maintaining a humble learning attitude

5. 本质心态：不被表象迷惑，执着于探寻问题的核心逻辑
   Essential mindset: Not being deceived by appearances, persisting in exploring the core logic of the problem

6. 进化心态：坚信认知可以迭代，主动更新自己的思维系统
   Evolutionary mindset: Believing firmly that cognition can be iterated, actively updating one’s thinking system

7. 开放心态：愿意倾听不同观点，不排斥与自己相悖的声音
   Open mindset: Willing to listen to different perspectives, not rejecting voices that contradict one’s own

8. 高维心态：跳出问题本身，站在更宏观的视角审视局面
   High-dimensional mindset: Jumping out of the problem itself, examining the situation from a more macro perspective

9. 清醒心态：在众人狂热时保持冷静，在众人悲观时保持理性
   Clear-minded attitude: Stay calm when the crowd is 狂热, remain rational when the crowd is pessimistic

10. 求是心态：尊重客观事实，不被主观臆断和情绪左右
    Objective attitude: Respect objective facts, not be swayed by subjective assumptions and emotions

二、 决策行动类心态
II. Decision and Action Mindsets

11. 果敢心态：权衡利弊后果断出手，不陷入无尽的犹豫
    Decisive attitude: Weigh the pros and cons and act decisively, not falling into endless hesitation

12. 试错心态：允许自己犯错，把失误当成成长的养分
    Trial-and-error mindset: Allow yourself to make mistakes, treat errors as nutrients for growth

13. 务实心态：立足现实条件，不好高骛远、不眼高手低
    Pragmatic mindset: Base actions on realistic conditions, avoid setting overly high goals or having lofty aspirations but low execution

14. 担当心态：为自己的选择负责，不推诿、不找借口
    Accountable mindset: Take responsibility for your choices, don’t shirk duty or make excuses

15. 弹性心态：计划遇阻时灵活调整，不钻牛角尖
    Flexible mindset: Adjust plans flexibly when encountering obstacles, don’t be stubborn or insist on a specific approach

16. 先手心态：主动预判趋势，提前布局而非被动应对
    First-mover mindset: Proactively anticipate trends and plan ahead rather than react passively

17. 止损心态：发现方向错误时及时抽身，不贪恋沉没成本
    Stop-loss mindset: Withdraw promptly when the direction is wrong, not clinging to sunk costs

18. 聚焦心态：一次只专注一件事，不分散精力贪多求全
    Focused mindset: Focus on one thing at a time, without scattering energy in pursuit of too much

19. 执行心态：想到就做，用行动代替空想和内耗
    Execution mindset: Act on thoughts, replacing empty thinking and internal friction with action

20. 复盘心态：做完事后总结得失，为下一次行动优化路径
    Mindset Review: Summarize gains and losses after completing tasks to optimize the path for the next action

三、 人际社交类心态
III. Interpersonal and Social Mindsets

21. 尊重心态：尊重他人的三观和选择，不随意评判指责
    Respectful Mindset: Respect others’ perspectives and choices, avoid arbitrary judgment and blame

22. 共情心态：站在对方立场感受情绪，理解他人的难处
    Empathetic Mindset: Stand in the other person’s shoes to feel emotions, understand their difficulties

23. 分寸心态：保持恰当的社交距离，不越界、不逾矩
    Sense of Proportion: Maintain appropriate social distance, don’t cross boundaries or overstep

24. 真诚心态：待人真心实意，不虚伪、不敷衍
    Attitude of Sincerity: Be genuine with others, don’t be insincere or dismissive

25. 感恩心态：铭记他人的善意，及时回馈点滴帮助
    Attitude of Gratitude: Remember others’ kindness and promptly reciprocate small acts of help

26. 包容心态：接纳他人的不完美，不斤斤计较小事
    Attitude of Tolerance: Accept others’ imperfections and don’t be overly critical of minor matters

27. 利他心态：先考虑为对方提供价值，再谈互惠互利
    Altruistic mindset: First consider providing value to others, then talk about mutual benefit

28. 低调心态：得意时不炫耀，失意时不抱怨
    Low-key mindset: Don’t boast when successful, and don’t complain when defeated

29. 守拙心态：适当收敛锋芒，不轻易暴露全部底牌
    Mind of modesty: Appropriately restrain your sharpness, and don’t easily reveal all your cards

30. 释然心态：关系散场时坦然接受，不纠缠、不苛责
    Mind of acceptance: Accept the end of a relationship calmly, without lingering or being harsh

四、 情绪抗压类心态
IV. Stress-Resilient Mindsets

31. 平和心态：得失宠辱不惊，保持情绪的稳定与平和
    Calm Mindset: Unfazed by gains and losses, maintaining emotional stability and peace

32. 钝感心态：对无关紧要的负面信息，降低敏感度
    Insensitive Mindset: Lowering sensitivity to trivial negative information

33. 坚韧心态：身处低谷时不放弃，在挫折中积蓄力量
    Resilient Mindset: Not giving up when at rock bottom, accumulating strength from setbacks

34. 自洽心态：与自己和解，接受不完美，不自我内耗
    Self-consistent mindset: Reconcile with oneself, accept imperfection, and avoid self-wasting

35. 乐观心态：在困境中看到希望，不被消极情绪裹挟
    Optimistic mindset: See hope in adversity, and not be overwhelmed by negative emotions

36. 松弛心态：不必事事紧绷，允许自己偶尔放慢脚步
    Relaxed mindset: Don’t be tense about everything, allow yourself to slow down occasionally

37. 接纳心态：接纳生活的无常，不执着于控制一切
    Accepting mindset: Accept the unpredictability of life, and not be 执着 on controlling everything

38. 自愈心态：受伤后懂得自我疗愈，不沉溺于负面情绪
    Self-healing mindset: Understanding how to heal oneself after being hurt, not indulging in negative emotions

39. 强韧心态：扛得住压力，受得了委屈，打不倒的才叫成长
    Resilient mindset: Able to withstand pressure, endure grievances, only those who cannot be defeated truly grow

40. 淡定心态：面对突发状况不慌乱，沉着应对各种变数
    Calm mindset: Not panicking when facing unexpected situations, responding steadily to various changes

五、 成长进阶类心态
V. Advanced Growth Mindsets

41. 终身学习心态：保持对世界的好奇，活到老学到老
    Mindset of Lifelong Learning: Maintain curiosity about the world, learn until the day you die

42. 刻意练习心态：聚焦短板，进行针对性的打磨和提升
    Mindset of Deliberate Practice: Focus on weaknesses, conduct targeted refinement and improvement

43. 跨界心态：主动学习跨领域知识，拓宽认知边界
    Mindset of Cross-Disciplinary Learning: Actively learn knowledge across fields, broaden cognitive boundaries

44. 精进心态：不满足于及格，追求把每件事做到更好
    Mindset of Constant Improvement: Be unsatisfied with just passing, strive to do better in everything

45. 沉淀心态：沉下心来积累，不急于求成、不浮躁冒进
    Cultivate a settled mindset: Accumulate with patience, avoid impatience for quick success, and refrain from being reckless and hasty.

46. 破圈心态：主动跳出舒适区，接触新的人和事
    Cultivate a mindset to break boundaries: Actively step out of your comfort zone and engage with new people and things.

47. 迭代心态：定期更新自己的能力，跟上时代的步伐
    Cultivate an iterative mindset: Regularly update your skills to keep pace with the times.

48. 专注心态：心无旁骛地投入，把时间花在刀刃上
    Cultivate a focused mindset: Dedicate yourself wholeheartedly, focusing your time on what truly matters

49. 探索心态：敢于尝试新事物，不怕走弯路
    Exploration mindset: Dare to try new things, not afraid of detours

50. 复盘心态：定期回顾过往，从经验中提取成长的养分
    Review mindset: Regularly review the past, extract nutrients for growth from experience

六、 财富事业类心态
VI. Mindset for Wealth and Career

51. 长期主义心态：做时间的朋友，相信复利的力量
    Long-term mindset: Be friends with time, believe in the power of compounding

52. 价值导向心态：聚焦创造价值，而非单纯追逐利益
    Value-oriented mindset: Focus on creating value, not just chasing profits

53. 风控心态：正视风险存在，不盲目冒险也不畏惧挑战
    Risk control mindset: Face the existence of risks, neither recklessly take risks nor fear challenges

54. 务实创业心态：脚踏实地做产品，不搞花架子
    Pragmatic entrepreneurial mindset: Grounded in product development, avoiding superficiality

55. 合作共赢心态：懂得借力，不单打独斗
    Collaborative win-win mindset: Knowing how to leverage resources, not going it alone

56. 危机预警心态：居安思危，提前预判潜在的风险
    Crisis early warning mindset: Stay vigilant in times of peace, pre-empting potential risks

57. 沉淀积累心态：事业低谷时沉心修炼，厚积薄发
    Accumulation mindset: Cultivate inner strength during career downturns, laying the foundation for future success

58. 创新突破心态：敢于打破常规，寻找新的增长点
    Mindset of Innovation and Breakthrough: Dare to break the 常规, seek new growth points

59. 匠人心态：对工作精益求精，打磨核心竞争力
    Mindset of Craftsmanship: Strive for perfection in work, polish core competitiveness

60. 平常心心态：事业起伏时不骄不躁，保持节奏稳步前行
    Mindset of Equanimity: Remain composed during career ups and downs, maintain rhythm and advance steadily

七、 生活处世类心态
VII. Mindsets for Life and Social Interactions

61. 极简心态：断舍离无用之物，追求简单纯粹的生活
    Minimalist mindset: Discard useless things, pursue a simple and pure life

62. 健康优先心态：把身体放在首位，不熬夜、不透支健康
    Health-first mindset: Put your body first, don’t stay up late, don’t overextend your health

63. 知足常乐心态：珍惜拥有的一切，不盲目攀比
    Contentment mindset: Cherish everything you have, don’t compare blindly

64. 随遇而安心态：面对变故坦然接受，随机应变
    Go-with-the-flow mindset: Accept changes calmly, adapt to circumstances

65. 热爱生活心态：发现日常的小美好，保持对生活的热忱
    Loving life mindset: Discover the small joys in daily life, maintain enthusiasm for life

66. 延迟满足心态：克制即时欲望，追求长远的幸福
    Delayed gratification mindset: Restrain immediate desires, pursue long-term happiness

67. 敢于拒绝心态：温和而坚定地说“不”，不委屈自己
    Daring to refuse mindset: Say “no” gently but firmly, don’t 委屈 yourself

68. 珍惜当下心态：活在此时此刻，不纠结过去、不焦虑未来
    Cherishing the present mindset: Live in the here and now, don’t dwell on the past or worry about the future

69. 体验至上心态：多去经历不同的生活，丰富人生阅历
    Experience-oriented mindset: Seek diverse life experiences to enrich your life journey

70. 从容不迫心态：按自己的节奏生活，不慌不忙、张弛有度
    Calm and composed mindset: Live at your own pace, unhurried and well-balanced

八、 破局突围类心态
VIII. Mindset for Breaking Through

71. 破局心态：打破固有的僵局，寻找新的出路
    Breaking through mindset: Break through rigid situations to find new ways out

72. 逆向心态：反方向思考问题，从结果倒推解决方案
    Reverse mindset: Think problems in the opposite direction, work backward from the result to find solutions

73. 借势心态：顺势而为，借助外部力量实现目标
    Leverage mindset: Go with the flow, utilize external forces to achieve goals

74. 差异化心态：找到自己的独特之处，打造不可替代性
    Differentiation mindset: Identify your unique aspects, create irreplaceability

75. 资源整合心态：整合身边的资源，实现优势互补
    Resource integration mindset: Integrate resources around you, achieve complementary advantages

76. 危机转化心态：把危机当成转机，在困境中寻找机会
    Crisis Transformation Mindset: Treat crises as opportunities, seeking chances in adversity

77. 颠覆心态：挑战传统模式，敢于创新和突破
    Subversive Mindset: Challenge traditional models, dare to innovate and break through

78. 主动求变心态：不满足于现状，主动寻求改变
    Proactive Change Mindset: Not satisfied with the status quo, actively seek change

79. 坚韧不拔心态：面对困难不退缩，越挫越勇
    Resilient Mindset: Face difficulties without retreating, grow stronger from setbacks

80. 野心与定力并存心态：有追求更高目标的野心，也有脚踏实地的定力
    A mindset of ambition and determination: having the ambition to pursue higher goals, while also having the determination to stay grounded

九、 自我修行类心态
IX. Mindsets related to self-cultivation

81. 自省心态：定期反思自己的言行，及时修正偏差
    Mindset of self-reflection: regularly reflecting on one’s words and actions, and promptly correcting deviations

82. 自律心态：主动约束自己，不被欲望和惰性左右
    Mindset of self-discipline: proactively restraining oneself, not being swayed by desires and inertia

83. 静心心态：在浮躁的世界里，保持内心的平静
    Mindset of Calmness: In a restless world, maintain inner peace

84. 包容心态：原谅他人的过错，也放过自己的执念
    Mindset of Tolerance: Forgive others’ faults and let go of one’s own obsessions

85. 谦卑心态：承认自己的局限，不骄傲自满
    Mindset of Humility: Acknowledge one’s limitations and avoid arrogance

86. 使命感心态：找到人生的意义，为之奋斗不息
    Mindset of Purpose: Find the meaning of life and strive tirelessly for it

87. 通透心态：看透事物的本质，活得清醒而明白
    Transparent mindset: See through the essence of things, live clear and aware

88. 自爱心态：好好爱自己，不自我否定、不自我PUA
    Self-love mindset: Love yourself well, don’t self-negate or self-PUA

89. 自信心态：相信自己的能力，不自卑、不怯懦
    Confident mindset: Believe in your abilities, don’t feel inferior or timid

90. 沉稳心态：遇事沉着冷静，不冲动行事、不口不择言
    Calm mindset: Stay composed when facing situations, don’t act impulsively or speak without thinking

十、 格局境界类心态
Section X: Mindsets Related to Grand Perspective and Boundaries

91. 大局心态：不计较一时得失，顾全整体利益
    Grand Perspective Mindset: Not caring about short-term gains or losses, focusing on the overall interests

92. 利他共赢心态：成人达己，相信帮助别人就是成就自己
    Altruistic Win-Win Mindset: Helping others to achieve one’s own success, believing that helping others is accomplishing oneself

93. 舍得心态：懂得有舍有得，小舍小得，大舍大得
    Giving and Receiving Mindset: Understanding that there is gain in giving and loss in not giving, small give small gain, big give big gain

94. 豁达心态：心胸开阔，不被琐事烦扰
    Open-minded attitude: Broad-minded, not troubled by trivial matters

95. 悲悯心态：对他人的苦难心怀善意，力所能及地伸出援手
    Compassionate attitude: Having goodwill towards others’ suffering, extending a helping hand to the best of one’s ability

96. 不争心态：不与他人争高低，只与自己比进步
    Non-competitive attitude: Not competing with others for superiority, only comparing oneself with one’s own progress

97. 宽厚心态：待人宽容厚道，不斤斤计较、不睚眦必报
    Magnanimous attitude: Treating others with tolerance and kindness, not being petty or holding grudges

98. 超然心态：看淡功名利禄，追求精神的富足
    Detached Mindset: Indifferent to fame and fortune, pursuing spiritual fulfillment

99. 传承心态：愿意分享自己的经验，帮助他人成长
    Legacy Mindset: Willing to share one’s own experience, helping others grow

100. 无我的心态：跳出自我的局限，追求更高的人生价值
     Selfless Mindset: transcending the limitations of the self, pursuing higher life values

衡水神话褪去，曾经反叛的衡中学生们 2025-12-20 阅读需要25分钟 衡水中学是应试教育体制下诞生的超级中学，素来以铁腕著称。长期以来，超高的升学率吸引着家长将孩子送往这里，它曾以“清北摇篮”的名号建立起教育神话。
The Legend of Hengshui Fades, Once-Rebellious Hengzhong Students 2025-12-20 Reading time needed: 25 minutes Hengzhong High School is a super high school born under the exam-oriented education system, known for its iron-fisted discipline. For a long time, its extremely high graduation rates have attracted parents to send their children here, and it once established an educational legend with the reputation of being the “cradle of Tsinghua and Peking University.”

然而，这个神话正在快速塌陷。最新数据显示，2025年衡中的清北录取人数只有 45 人左右，相比 2019 年的 275 人暴跌了 84%。政策趋严、外地招生受限，让这所学校赖以建立声望的模式正在失去支撑。
However, this myth is rapidly collapsing. The latest data shows that the number of students admitted to Tsinghua and Peking University from Hengzhong High School in 2025 is only around 45, a dramatic drop of 84% compared to the 275 students in 2019. With stricter policies and limited enrollment from outside areas, the model that has long been relied upon to build the school’s reputation is losing its support.

本文是真故2019年发表过的一篇旧文，记录了当时衡中学生的真实经历。两位作者发现，学生们在整齐划一的管理和量化压力之下，建立了一套对抗高压环境的生存策略。6年过去，读来仍有很大启发。
This article is a repost of an old piece published by Zhen Gu in 2019, documenting the real experiences of students at Hengzhong High School at that time. The two authors found that under the uniform management and quantitative pressure, the students had developed a set of survival strategies to cope with the high-pressure environment. Six years later, reading it still offers great inspiration.

01 不吃蛋糕的人
01 Those Who Don’t Eat the Cake

在衡水中学，激励学生的方式五花八门。林禾青高三那年，一次月考过后，学校组织了一个活动：月考前30名的同学，和下一次月考想考前30名的同学，被召集进同一间教室，考了前30的人吃蛋糕，想考前30的人看着他们吃蛋糕。
At Hengzhong High School, there are various ways to motivate students. During his senior year, Lin Heqing participated in an activity organized by the school after a monthly exam: the top 30 students from the previous exam and the next 30 students aiming for the top 30 were gathered in the same classroom. The top 30 students ate cake, while the students aiming for the top 30 watched them eat cake.

林禾青考进了前30名，是可以享用蛋糕的人。但她没去。
Lin Heqing made it into the top 30, making her eligible to eat cake. But she didn’t go.

“我认为这样的激励方式对我没有意义。”她一本正经地回答老师的询问。在整齐划一的强压教育下，林禾青试图保持某种清醒。
“I think this kind of motivation doesn’t mean anything to me,” she answered the teacher’s question earnestly. Under the uniform and intense pressure of education, Lin Heqing tried to maintain a certain clarity.

这所全国知名的中学以铁腕著称，它是应试教育体制下诞生的超级学校，一方面以极高的升学率为人熟知，许多家长挤破头想要把孩子送进这里；另一方面它以整齐划一、泯灭个性的管理方式强压十几岁的少年人，给不少人留下难以磨灭的阴影。
This nationally renowned high school is famous for its iron fist. It is a super school born out of the exam-oriented education system. On one hand, it is known for its extremely high graduation rates, with many parents desperate to get their children into it; on the other hand, it forces its teenage students into uniformity and the suppression of individuality through its management style, leaving many with indelible shadows.

每周日一次的班会，和誓师大会、月度总结颁奖大会、班级挑战大会一起，组成了衡水中学的精神方阵。“我傲立九天之上，恨不能万世为王”；“进清华，和主席总理称兄道弟；入北大，与大家巨匠论道谈经”；“两眼一睁，开始竞争”，以及更为打动少年人的关键词“青春”、“梦想”、“奋斗”、“热血”，这些豪气冲天的口号飘荡在大会之上，又在高声演说中注射进学生的大脑。
Once-a-week Sunday class meetings, along with the 誓师大会 (誓师大会), monthly summary and award ceremonies, and class challenge meetings, formed the spiritual backbone of Hengshui High School. Slogans like “I stand supreme above the nine heavens, wishing to be king for all eternity”; “Get into Tsinghua, become brothers with the president and prime minister; enter Peking University, debate with great scholars”; “Open your eyes and start competing,” as well as more moving keywords for teenagers like “youth,” “dreams,” “struggle,” and “passion,” drifted through the meetings and were injected into the students’ brains through loud speeches.

在这些统一思想、鼓舞士气的活动面前，甚至学习也需要让位。开班会的时候，林禾青把桌子上的书摞得老高，躲在后面学习，努力屏蔽班主任滔滔不绝的激情演说，班主任说：“你就差这一个小时吗？磨刀不误砍柴工！”
In the face of these activities that unify thoughts and boost morale, even studying had to take a backseat. During class meetings, Lin Hengqing piled books high on the desk, hiding behind them to study, trying hard to block out her homeroom teacher’s passionate speech. The teacher said, “You’re just an hour away! A sharp knife is better than a dull one!”

她也常常怀疑，比如老师在黑板上写的“考个高分报亲恩”，林禾青想了很久，前四个字和后三个字到底有没有关系。
She often wondered, for example, about the phrase “Get a high score to repay your parents” written on the blackboard by the teacher. Lin Hengqing thought about it for a long time, trying to figure out if the first four characters were related to the last three.

在密不透风的铁幕之下，林禾青理所当然成为一个异数。她至今可以逐一数出自己在三年间留下的“违纪史”。
Under the impenetrable iron curtain, Lin Hengqing naturally became an anomaly. She can still list, year by year, the “disciplinary records” she left over three years.

高一，晚上睡着后翻了个身，被查寝老师看到，扣分，理由是“在床上翻来覆去不睡觉”。
In her freshman year, after falling asleep at night, she rolled over and was seen by the dormitory inspection teacher, who deducted points, citing the reason, “flipping around in bed instead of sleeping.”

高二，被班主任搜到一本从图书馆借的《霍乱时期的爱情》，被没收，超期了三个月没还书，班主任执意不给，还给家长打电话说：“这个孩子有问题，她竟然在看《霍乱时期的爱情》，她是不是想谈恋爱呀！”
In senior high school, she was caught by her homeroom teacher with a copy of *Love in the Time of Cholera* borrowed from the library, which was confiscated. She had not returned the book for three months, and her homeroom teacher insisted on not giving it back, even calling her parents and saying, “This child has problems. She’s actually reading *Love in the Time of Cholera*. Is she thinking about dating?”

高三，晚上睡觉时脚抽筋，她坐起来，正好被查寝老师的手电照到，扣分。
In senior high school, she had a foot cramp while sleeping at night, sat up, and was caught by the dormitory inspection teacher’s flashlight, resulting in points being deducted.

高三，午休结束后，拿着一个没吃完的苹果向教室走，被年级部老师抓到，要求拿着苹果拍照留证，到教务处写检查。
In senior high school, after lunch break, she was walking to class holding an uneaten apple, and was caught by the school’s disciplinary office teacher. They demanded that she take a photo with the apple as evidence and write a self-criticism at the school administration office.

有段时间，她总是做梦。梦到老师同学在班上发现了蛛丝马迹，巧克力皮、橘子皮，都说是林禾青吃的，她拼命说“不是我不是我”。
For a while, she kept having dreams. In the dreams, her teachers and classmates discovered traces in the classroom—chocolate wrappers, orange peels—claiming they were eaten by Lin Heqing. She desperately said, “It’s not me, it’s not me.”

“那段时间连续违纪，防不胜防，莫名其妙就被抓，特别崩溃。”离开衡中三年后，她讲起这些故事，像是说着别人的笑话，又像是看到了彼时的自己。嘴角带着一丝苦笑。
“During that time, continuous violations occurred, unstoppable, and I was caught inexplicably, which was particularly crushing.” Three years after leaving Hengzhong, she recounted these stories as if telling someone else’s jokes, yet as if she was seeing her past self. A faint bitter smile played on her lips.

除了这些“小事儿”，她还做了一件“大事儿”：逃操半年。
Besides these “small matters,” she also did something significant: skipping roll call for half a year.

跑操是衡水中学的标志性场景。每周的开放日，甚至会有人花上两百元的门票，来参观这一人间奇景。每个班七八十人，排成六列，脚尖贴着脚跟，前胸挨着后背，距离近到鼻息都会打在前面人的脖梗子上。每个班的队伍，挤挤挨挨组装得像一架坦克。
Roll call is a signature scene at Hengshui High School. During the school’s open days, some people would even spend 200 yuan in admission to witness this human 奇景. Each class, with 70 or 80 students, would form six columns, with toes touching heels, chests pressed against backs, so close that their breath would hit the necks of the people in front. Each class’s formation, packed tightly together, looked like a tank.

每天跑两圈，每圈喊一次口号。在那些口号里，出现最多的，是“拼搏”“必胜”“青春”“清北”这类词汇。有时候，身高一米九的校长张文茂会站在行政楼的高台上，俯视他的“孩子们”，威严的架势如同检阅军队的领袖。
They ran two laps every day, shouting slogans each time. Among those slogans, the most frequent words were “strive,” “win,” “youth,” and “Tsinghua and Peking.” Sometimes, the school principal Zhang Wenmao, who was 1.9 meters tall, would stand on the high platform of the administrative building, overlooking his “children,” with an imposing demeanor like a leader reviewing an army.

高二夏天，早操刚开跑，林禾青的鞋带开了，后面的人踩住了她的鞋带，她失去平衡，向前扑倒，其他人的步伐跟着乱了，踢踩磕碰，最终大片倾倒，林禾青被压在最下面，还有一个同学露着的胳膊上擦破了好大一片。两个星期内，她以同样的方式摔倒两次。“我不敢跑操，特别害怕，一跑操浑身都在发抖。”
In the summer of her sophomore year, during morning exercises, Lin Heqing’s shoelace came undone. Someone behind her stepped on it, causing her to lose balance and fall forward. The others’ steps became disorganized, leading to kicks, stomps, and collisions, ultimately resulting in a large group of them toppling over. Lin Heqing was crushed at the bottom, and another classmate’s exposed arm was scraped badly. In two weeks, she fell in the same way twice. “I don’t dare run during morning exercises; I’m terrified, and my whole body trembles whenever I do.”

更令人痛苦的是，夏天跑操后，同学们身上散发着的汗味。这涉及另一个问题，洗澡。衡中的澡堂是2011届学生们的集体记忆，所有的女生采访对象聊起衡中的澡堂，都是一边说一边笑，笑得要流出眼泪来。
What made it even more unbearable was the sweat smell that lingered on the students after morning exercises. This brought up another issue: showering. The shower facility at Hengzhong was a collective memory for the 2011 graduating class. Every girl interviewed about Hengzhong’s shower facility would talk about it while laughing, laughing so hard tears would well up in their eyes.

当时的衡中，每周给一次洗澡时间，吃饭加洗澡，50分钟，珍贵得不可一世。澡堂没有隔断，因为人多，每次洗澡时间，都是两到五个人围着一个淋浴洗，人挨人人挤人，满目都是白花花的身体，几乎类同于生鲜市场。
At that time, Hengzhong only allowed showering once a week, combined with meals, for 50 minutes—a time considered incredibly precious. The shower facility had no partitions because of the large number of people. During each showering session, two to five people would huddle around a shower, packed tightly together. The view was filled with bare bodies, almost like a fresh produce market.

出于对跑操的极度恐惧，林禾青想要向老师请长假，老师一句话就把她噎了回去：“就你特殊？”
Due to her extreme fear of morning exercises, Lin Heqing wanted to request an extended leave from her teacher. But the teacher shut her down with a single sentence: “What, only you?”

林禾青依旧我行我素。
Lin Heqing remained true to herself.

“因为我根本就不相信他说的那些东西。我学习不是因为环境让我学习，是我自己要学习。”这个看似简单的道理，在衡中奇妙的氛围中成为一种难得的清醒觉悟。
“I simply don’t believe the things he says. I study not because the environment forces me to, but because I want to.” This seemingly simple principle becomes a rare moment of clarity in the magical atmosphere of Hengzhong.

2014年，她参加高考，谁也没有料到，她是那一年最大的黑马，她成为了河北省高考状元。
In 2014, she took the college entrance examination, and no one expected that she would be the biggest dark horse of that year. She became the provincial champion of Hebei Province in the college entrance examination.

02 执法者毁于执法
02 The Enforcer Ruined by Enforcement

“她是一个十足的叛逆者。”李翰是林禾青高三时的班长，在北京昌平的一家烤鱼店里，他这样评价林禾青。
“She is a complete rebel.” Li Han, Lin Hengqing’s class monitor during his senior year, said this about Lin Hengqing at a grilled fish restaurant in Changping, Beijing.

高三的周测，林禾青情绪不好，作文写了两三行，实在写不下去了，就交了卷。
During the senior year weekly test, Lin Hengqing wasn’t in a good mood. He wrote only two or three lines for the essay and couldn’t continue, so he handed in the test paper.

第二天，李翰宣布：周测名次退步的同学，交份检查。
The next day, Li Han announced: students who dropped in rank for the weekly test must submit a self-criticism.

林禾青没交。
Lin Hengqing didn’t submit one.

他气冲冲地走到讲台上，当着全班同学的面，指着林禾青吼道：“你作文就得了五分，还不交反思？”
He stormed to the podium, pointing at Lin Heqing in front of the entire class, and yelled, “Your essay only got five points, and you still haven’t handed in your reflection?”

林禾青回击：“你说的时候我没在，没听到。”
Lin Heqing retorted, “I wasn’t there when you said it, so I didn’t hear.”

那天两人吵得很凶。
They argued fiercely that day.

三年后，北京大学的学生林禾青和中国政法大学的学生李翰一块吃饭。
Three years later, Lin Heqing, a student at Peking University, and Li Han, a student at China University of Political Science and Law, were having a meal together.

李翰说：“那天说完你，我就后悔了。”
Li Han said, “After I finished speaking to you that day, I regretted it.”

林禾青说：“我也是说完你就后悔了。”
Lin Heqing said, “I also regretted it after I finished speaking to you.”

林禾青早就完全地理解李翰。衡水中学的压力是层层传导的，李翰的压力来自班主任的要求，李翰既是被管理者，也是执法者。他勤勤恳恳地帮学校和班主任维持秩序，还为了“心中的正义”，给班上同学告御状。
Lin Heqing had long since fully understood Li Han. The pressure at Hengshui High School was passed down in layers. Li Han’s pressure came from the requirements of his homeroom teacher. He was both managed and the enforcer. He diligently helped the school and the homeroom teacher maintain order, and even for the sake of “his own justice,” he filed complaints on behalf of his classmates.

量化是衡中管理制度的核心。成绩、纪律、卫生、跑操，是量化考核的四大指标，事关班主任的奖金，以及班干部的荣誉。
Quantification is the core of Hengzhong’s management system. Grades, discipline, hygiene, and morning exercises are the four major indicators of quantitative assessment, concerning the bonuses of homeroom teachers and the honor of class cadres.

量化掌握在“年级部”、“小黄帽”和查寝老师手里。所谓小黄帽，就是戴着黄色棒球帽的年级部学生会成员。跑操前，跑操时，早饭后，晚饭后，还有把十分钟课间挤压成八分钟的“预备铃”前，他们都在盯着手表计时，拿着纸笔计分。
Quantification is in the hands of the “Grade Department,” the “Yellow Hat” student representatives, and the dormitory monitors. The so-called “Yellow Hat” refers to the student council members of the Grade Department wearing yellow baseball caps. Before and during the run, after breakfast and dinner, and even squeezing a ten-minute break into eight minutes just before the “预备铃” (pre-bell), they are constantly watching their watches to keep time and holding paper and pens to score.

他们站在教室后门，从窗户往里看，并记下“上课喝牛奶”“上课转笔”“上课扭头笑”这类的违纪事实，为方便记录，每个学生的座位都可以用方位表示，比如“北一后一北二”，就代表北边第一大组最后一排从北数第二个学生。不久，班主任就会找那个同学兴师问罪。
They stand at the back doors of the classrooms, looking in through the windows, and record disciplinary facts like “drinking milk during class,” “writing in class,” and “laughing out of turn.” For easy record-keeping, each student’s seat can be represented by a directional notation, such as “North Group 1, back row, second from the North,” referring to the second student from the North in the last row of North Group 1. Soon after, the homeroom teacher will summon the student for reprimand.

高三，一次跑完课间操，一个女生“小黄帽”告诉李翰：“你们班队形乱，要扣分。”他形容自己当时的心情：“我一听到乱字，脑袋就像炸了一样。”
In senior year, after one run of the inter-class exercise, a girl wearing a “Yellow Hat” told Li Han, “Your class formation is messy; you’ll lose points.” He described his reaction at the time: “The moment I heard ‘messy,’ my head felt like it exploded.”

李翰也做过“小黄帽”，那是高二的时候。用他自己的话说，“是一种投机主义”。
Li Han had also been a “Yellow Hat” during his sophomore year. In his own words, it was “a form of opportunism.”

“小黄帽”像个护身符，给他带来过不少好处。比如，假期不用写作业，打通学生会的人际关系，就不用被查。比如，课间操的时候去班里查零食，想查谁查谁，查到了直接自己拿走吃掉。比如，借事翘课，拎着帽子出去溜达溜达。他甚至悟出一个道理：“一旦跻身了权力阶层，你会发现人跟人都是有利益交集的。”
“The Little Yellow Hat” was like a talisman, bringing him many benefits. For example, during holidays, he didn’t have to do homework. By navigating the interpersonal relationships in the student union, he avoided being checked. For instance, during break exercises, he would go to the classroom to check for snacks, and he could check anyone he wanted. If he found something, he would simply take it and eat it himself. For example, he would skip class under the guise of an excuse, grabbing his hat and going out for a stroll. He even figured out a principle: “Once you join the power hierarchy, you’ll realize that everyone has intersecting interests.”

回味过去，李翰感到一阵荒诞。“我不认识那时的自己。我现在想想我好搞笑啊。”
Looking back, Li Han felt a sense of absurdity. “I don’t recognize that version of myself. I think I’m so funny now when I think about it.”

在衡中时，李翰并不是什么异数，他曾是衡中评价体系中最优秀的那种学生。从文理分科之后，就做班长，一直做到高考。高三一年，成绩长期保持在文科实验班前五名，这意味着他是个极有希望考上“清北”的学生，是像大熊猫一样的保护动物。
During his time at Hengzhong High School, Li Han was far from an anomaly. He was one of the top students in the school’s evaluation system. After the liberal arts and sciences division, he became class monitor and held the position until the college entrance exams. During his senior year, his grades consistently ranked in the top five of the liberal arts experimental class, which meant he had a high chance of getting into “Tsinghua” or “Peking University,” making him a protected species like a giant panda.

但规矩的守护者也会被规矩所摧毁。高考前一个月，一个周六的晚上，难得的放松时刻。张家口人李翰离家远没回去，他和朋友从外面带进宿舍一只烧鸡，想在熄灯后，偷偷摸摸地大快朵颐。
But even the guardians of rules can be destroyed by them. A month before the college entrance exams, on a Saturday night, during a rare moment of relaxation. Li Han, from Zhangjiakou, hadn’t gone home yet. He and his friends brought a roasted chicken into the dormitory from outside, planning to secretly enjoy it after the lights went out.

一只鸡翅膀还没吃完，年级部老师一脚把门踹开了。
A chicken wing wasn’t even finished when a teacher from the grade department kicked the door open with a single foot.

那天，李翰彻夜未眠。他有一种感觉，自己往日磨的薄得不能再薄的刀，一刀劈在了石头上，咯嘣一声，断了。
That day, Li Han didn’t sleep all night. He had a feeling that the knife he had honed to be as thin as possible had struck a stone, and with a crack, it broke.

第二天，他等来了处理结果：回家。
The next day, he received the outcome of the disciplinary action: go home.

这么严重的处理是出自学校考前抓典型整肃纪律的需要，对他这样的好学生毫不手软，更能起到杀鸡儆猴的作用。
Such a severe punishment came from the school’s need to set an example and discipline during the exam period. It showed no mercy to good students like him, and it could better serve to warn others.

李翰的妈妈从家里赶来接他回张家口。从衡水到张家口火车要走10个小时，因为远，他平时放假都不回家。爸妈开车来接他回家，一趟是四个半小时，来回花费大于1000元。
Li Han’s mother rushed from home to pick him up and take him back to Zhangjiakou. The train ride from Hengshui to Zhangjiakou takes 10 hours, so because it’s far, he doesn’t go home during his free time. His parents drove to pick him up, and the one-way trip takes four and a half hours, with the round trip costing more than 1000 yuan.

对父母的歉疚，给他带来了最大的痛苦。他描述回家那几天的感觉：“如同万箭穿心，很复杂，后悔，愧疚，愤怒，委屈……”
Guilt towards his parents brought him the greatest pain. He described the feelings he had during those days of returning home: “It felt like being pierced by thousands of arrows, very complex, regret, guilt, anger, grievances…”

这件事情对他的打击之大，直接影响了他高考的发挥。本来对于清华北大胜券在握的李翰，因为高考前的情绪崩塌，最后只考入中国政法大学。
The impact of this event directly affected his performance in the college entrance examination. Li Han, who was originally certain of getting into Tsinghua or Peking University, due to emotional collapse before the exam, ended up only being admitted to China University of Political Science and Law.

而这一事件留下的阴影仍然笼罩在李翰身上。进入大学之后，他变得内敛，与学院系统保持距离，对“集体”保持高度警惕，学校的组织和活动，能不参与就不参与。
The shadow left by this event still looms over Li Han. After entering university, he became reserved, kept a distance from the academic system, and maintained a high level of vigilance towards “the collective.” He would participate in school organizations and activities only when necessary.

他现在信奉美食，经常一个人下馆子，“但就是没有当初那种味道了，那个鸡是真香”，他笑了一阵，又停住了。
He now advocates for good food, often dining alone in restaurants, “but it just doesn’t have the taste it used to have, that chicken is truly fragrant,” he chuckled for a moment before stopping.

03结成团推对抗
03 Forming Cliques to Resist

如果说林禾青是叛逆者，那么康乔则是一个不折不扣的不稳定因素。他和李翰从小一起长大，但到了衡水中学之后，放纵不羁的康乔无法忍受严守规矩的李翰，于是两人分道扬镳。
If Lin Hengqing is a rebel, then Kang Qiao is an undeniable unstable element. He and Li Han grew up together since childhood, but after entering Hengshui High School, the unrestrained Kang Qiao couldn’t tolerate the rule-bound Li Han, and the two went their separate ways.

康乔高高瘦瘦，是那种很讨人喜欢的阳光大男孩。入学之后，他很快有了一帮兄弟，组成了自己的小团体。他们靠小团体的力量对抗环境的巨压，用朋友之间得到的善意的理解，来消解少年人被压抑的巨大不满。学校规定，22:10熄灯睡觉，23:40之后才能去厕所。他们就经常等到23:40之后，在厕所相会，蹲在一个个坑位上夜聊。
Kang Qiao was tall and slim, the kind of sunny, likable boy. After enrollment, he quickly gathered a group of friends and formed his own clique. They relied on the strength of their small group to resist the immense pressure of the environment, using the kind understanding they received from friends to alleviate the great dissatisfaction of young people. The school 规定 had a 22:10 curfew and only allowed bathroom visits after 23:40. They often waited until after 23:40 to meet in the bathroom, squatting on various toilet stalls for late-night chats.

小团伙中有一个男生的父亲是开书店的，经常能打印一些资料，他们就如饥似渴地传阅，那里隐藏着跟历史课本上不太一样的历史。他们高谈阔论，谈国家和社会，也谈衡中体制和教育制度，评析和批判每一个标语、每一句口号，颇有些“恰同学少年”的感觉。
One of the boys in the clique’s father ran a bookstore and often printed materials, which they eagerly shared. There, they found history different from what was taught in their textbooks. They engaged in passionate discussions about the country and society, as well as the Hengzhong system and educational institutions. They analyzed and criticized every slogan and slogan, giving off a sense of being “just like fellow youth.”

康乔颇具领袖气质，讲义气，周迎是被他影响的人之一。
Kang Qiao possesses a strong leader’s charisma and is very loyal, and Zhou Ying is one of those influenced by him.

周迎刚进衡中的时候，从不敢违纪，学习成绩一般，调研考试考年级1000多名，在实验班里排倒数，在同学们面前抬不起头。他来自秦皇岛，距离衡水 500 公里，几乎每次放假，父母都会开四五个小时的车来看他，车上塞满了家里带的零食。考不好，他觉得愧对父母，一给家里打电话就哭。
When Zhou Ying first entered Hengzhong High School, he never dared to break rules, his academic performance was average, and in research exams, he scored among the top 1,000 in the grade, ranking last in the experimental class, unable to hold his head up in front of his classmates. He came from Qinhuangdao, which is 500 kilometers away from Hengshui, and almost every time he had a break, his parents would drive for four or five hours to see him, the car packed with snacks from home. When he didn’t perform well in exams, he felt guilty towards his parents and would cry every time he called home.

自从进入文科班，结识康乔后，他慢慢地变了。他开始参加厕所夜谈会、打球、阅读开书店的叔叔打印的资料，渐渐明白生活中不能只有学习。
Ever since entering the liberal arts class and meeting Kang Qiao, he gradually changed. He started participating in the bathroom late-night talks, playing basketball, and reading materials printed by his uncle who ran a bookstore, slowly understanding that life couldn’t revolve around studying alone.

高三，他的叛逆达到顶峰，以至于班主任在班上对他做出这样的评价：“有些同学很愚蠢、幼稚，想以自己的成绩为代价反抗教育制度。”
In his senior year, his rebelliousness reached its peak, to the point where his homeroom teacher made the following evaluation in class: “Some students are foolish and naive, wanting to sacrifice their own academic performance to rebel against the education system.”

高三时，他参与自主招生，申请了校荐名额，按照当时的成绩，预期会拿到复旦的名额，结果被分到了西安交通大学。他发现很多成绩比他差的同学，分到了更好的大学的名额。
In his senior year of high school, he participated in the independent enrollment program and applied for a school-recommended spot. Based on his performance at the time, he expected to secure a spot at Fudan University, but instead, he was assigned to Xi’an Jiaotong University. He noticed that many classmates with lower scores than him were allocated spots at better universities.

他开始意识到，这里除了成绩，还有一些不能言说的东西。家人劝他去参加西安交大的自主招生，他不听，意气用事放弃了这个名额，就因为这件事“很不尊重、很不公平”。
He began to realize that there were factors beyond academic performance at play. His family persuaded him to participate in Xi’an Jiaotong University’s independent enrollment program, but he refused, acting impulsively and giving up the spot because he felt it was “very disrespectful and unfair.”

那天晚上，天很冷。跟家人打过电话，周迎突然想哭，他走到操场上，躺在凉飕飕的草皮上，望着深蓝色的天空，告诉自己：“只能靠自己了，只有高考一条路了。”
That night, it was very cold. After talking to his family on the phone, Zhou Ying suddenly felt like crying. He walked to the sports field, lay down on the chilly grass, and gazed at the deep blue sky, telling himself, “I can only rely on myself now; there’s only the college entrance exam as a path.”

班主任的一句话他听进了心里：“如果你自己不够强大，就只能做教育制度的牺牲品。”
One sentence from his homeroom teacher stuck with him: “If you’re not strong enough yourself, you’ll only become a victim of the education system.”

三年后，香港中文大学的学生周迎回想起高中生活，仍然无法抑制激动的情绪：“压迫无孔不入，如果顺从，会迷失掉自己非常信仰的东西！”他庆幸自己没成为老师说的那种牺牲品，但是他知道，在光辉灿烂的成绩后面，有太多人当了炮灰。
Three years later, Zhou Ying, a student at The Chinese University of Hong Kong, recalled his high school life and still couldn’t suppress his emotional excitement: “Oppression seeps into every pore, and if you comply, you’ll lose the very things you deeply believe in!” He was grateful that he hadn’t become the sacrifice the teacher spoke of, but he knew that behind the brilliant grades, too many people had become cannon fodder.

上海的雨夜，刚从CBD高层写字楼里一家投资咨询公司实习下班的周迎身着西装，看起来神采奕奕，几年前衡中操场上那个跑操一摇一晃的胖子已经不见踪影。
On a rainy night in Shanghai, Zhou Ying, fresh from his internship at an investment consulting firm in a high-rise office building in the CBD, looked radiant in a suit. The slightly plump figure that used to sway while jogging on the campus of Hengzhong High School had vanished years ago.

04 聪明的人会钻空子
04 Smart people find loopholes

和林禾青一样，黎方也不想跑操。不过相比林禾青硬碰硬的办法，黎方更懂得钻规则的空子。
Like Lin Hengqing, Li Fang didn’t want to jog either. However, compared to Lin Hengqing’s direct confrontation, Li Fang was more skilled at exploiting loopholes in the rules.

高一军训，他看了两天跑操训练，断定这样跑操既不能起到体育锻炼的效果，而且像马戏团耍猴一样滑稽，主要是为了领导们看着爽。
During the senior high school military training, he watched two days of the running drills and concluded that this kind of running drills could neither achieve the effects of physical exercise nor be as ridiculous as a circus monkey show; it was mainly for the leaders’ amusement.

图片描述
Image Description

作者图 | 衡水中学候操的学生们
Author photo | Students from Hengshui High School during morning drills

于是他找到班主任，义正言辞地说：“我想当体委，为班集体做贡献！”老师没有拒绝的理由。就这样，黎方每到一个新班，都当体委，当了三年。
So he found his homeroom teacher and said earnestly, “I want to be the physical education committee member, contributing to the class collective!” The teacher had no reason to refuse. That way, Li Fang became the physical education committee member in every new class he joined, serving for three years.

体委在队伍两侧跑，负责把握队形整齐，带着喊口号，不用和别人摩肩接踵。黎方甚至连口号也不喊，因为体委不止一个，他不喊，自然有人愿意喊。当体委后，他顺理成章地从被耍的猴变成了看耍猴的看客。
The physical education teacher ran on both sides of the team, responsible for maintaining formation, leading the slogans, and not bumping into others. Li Fang didn’t even shout slogans because there were multiple physical education teachers, and since he didn’t shout, naturally someone else was willing to. After the physical education teachers took over, he effortlessly transformed from the monkey being played with to an onlooker watching the monkey being played.

“又没有尊严又没有发言权，一群奴隶才能练成这样。”他说这话时，平静的表情，无所谓的口吻，带着一贯的自信和自负。
“Lacking both dignity and the right to speak, only a group of slaves can train like this,” he said with a calm expression and an indifferent tone, carrying his usual confidence and arrogance.

黎方是个物理奥赛生。他热爱物理，是那种有天赋的人。初中自学了微积分和高中物理，40分钟就能把高考数学卷做到140分以上，20多分的椭圆解析几何大题非要用三角形证全等去做。
Li Fang was a physics olympiad student. He loved physics and was a naturally talented person. In middle school, he self-studied calculus and high school physics, and could score above 140 on the college entrance exam math paper in just 40 minutes, even solving the difficult ellipse analytical geometry problem that required proving triangles congruent.

到衡中以后，他就像被戴上了紧箍咒。虽然高一物理的知识他初二就会了，但是还得按照老师的要求认真做笔记，刷那些在他看来很弱智的习题。他想看国家队难度的奥赛题、学大学物理，被视为歪门邪道。他精力旺盛，努力了三年都没有能在午休时间睡着过，所以只好偷偷带个不能上网的手机，午休时间用衣服蒙着头，看手机上的小说。
After entering Hengzhong High School, he felt as if he had been put on a tight headband. Although he had already mastered the physics of his freshman year in eighth grade, he still had to take notes seriously and do those exercises that he found very foolish according to the teacher’s requirements. He wanted to study the national team-level olympiad problems and university physics, which was considered a wrong path. Being energetic, he tried for three years but never managed to fall asleep during lunch breaks, so he had to secretly bring a non-internet-connected phone, covering his head with his clothes during lunch to read novels on his phone.

手机里只有一部《龙族》，他来来回回看了十遍以上。黎方喜欢看书，高中三年，他的阅读资料极度匮乏。只有一部《龙族》，一本《法医学》，和一本《丑陋的中国人》。在衡中，“闲书”是受到严格控制的。
There is only one copy of “Dragon Raja” in his phone, and he has watched it over ten times. Li Fang loves reading, but during his three years of high school, his reading materials were extremely scarce. There was only one copy of “Dragon Raja”, a book of forensic medicine, and a book titled “The Ugly Chinese.” At Hengzhong High School, “extra-curricular books” were strictly controlled.

他甚至把抄书当成一种放松。一本大学教材《热力学》，他从头到尾抄了一遍，包括前言、序言、目录、插图。
He even considered copying books as a form of relaxation. A university textbook on thermodynamics, he copied from cover to cover, including the preface, introduction, table of contents, and illustrations.

在衡中，每天晚饭后有20分钟的新闻时间，播放老师剪辑过的《新闻联播》、《焦点访谈》、《新闻直播间》等节目。新闻是必须放的，因为学校会派人检查，但是高三的班级，新闻都是静音放的，所有人都低头学习，任主播在屏幕上滔滔不绝。
At Hengzhong High School, there was a 20-minute news time every evening after dinner, where programs like “News Broadcast,” “Focus,” and “News Live” were played, all edited by teachers. News had to be played because the school would send people to check, but in the senior classes, the news was played silently, and everyone studied while looking down, regardless of how the anchors rambled on the screen.

整个班，只有黎方会抬头看，但是好几次，他正看着，冷不丁地后脑勺就被班主任按下去了，被按了几次之后，他也不抬头了。
The entire class, only Li Fang would look up, but several times, just as he was looking, his back of the head would be pressed down by the head teacher. After being pressed down a few times, he stopped looking up.

衡中给每个奥赛生上了双保险，所以学竞赛科目的同时，高考科目也不能丢下。但是对于黎方来说，给他学物理的时间太少了。他想学物理。化学课，他学物理，生物课，他也学物理。为此，被老师没收书、和老师吵架、被赶出教室。他陷入了极端的理想主义，越是不让学，越要学。
Hengzhong provided double insurance for each competition student, so while studying for competition subjects, they couldn’t neglect their college entrance exam subjects. But for Li Fang, there was simply too little time for him to study physics. He wanted to study physics. In chemistry class, he studied physics; in biology class, he also studied physics. For this, he had his books confiscated by teachers, argued with teachers, and was even kicked out of the classroom. He fell into an extreme form of idealism, the more he was forbidden to study it, the more he wanted to.

被赶出后，他就没再回去，找了一间空教室，自己在里面偷偷学物理。跟老师撕破脸，老师不再理他，也相当于达成了某种妥协。
After being kicked out, he never went back. He found an empty classroom and secretly studied physics by himself inside. Having torn his face with the teacher, the teacher no longer paid attention to him, which was also a kind of compromise.

事实上黎方为自己争取到了一部分自由。但是他也为此付出了很大的代价，比如精神上巨大的压迫感，整个人变得歇斯底里。
In fact, Li Fang has secured some freedom for himself. But he has also paid a great price for it, such as immense mental oppression, making him completely hysterical.

“我本来是一个情绪很稳定很理性的人，被他们逼得很疯狂很极端。给我自由的话我是不会放纵的，我是可以把我自己管得很不错的，但是他们给我一顿乱管，我就什么都不会了。”这是一个天才少年的自述。
“I was originally a very emotionally stable and rational person, but they drove me to the point of madness and extremity. If I had been given freedom, I would not have indulged. I am capable of managing myself very well, but they interfered so recklessly, and I became completely helpless.” This is the self-description of a gifted teenager.

衡中的学习方法是为多数人准备的。黎方这样的异数，只能在挣扎中自求多福。
Hengzhong’s learning methods are designed for the majority. Li Fang, such an anomaly, can only struggle and seek his own fortune in the process.

他没赌赢。物理奥赛的省赛中，因为一道“有争议”的题目，他与省队失之交臂，无缘保送，只剩高考一条路。
He didn’t win the bet. In the provincial competition of the Physics Olympiad, due to a “controversial” question, he missed the provincial team, was unable to be recommended, and was left with only the Gaokao as his path.

幸运的是，他通过了中国科技大学物理系的自主招生。高考之后填报志愿，出于某种仪式感，他就填了一个学校一个专业。这正是他最喜欢、也最适合他的。功德圆满。
Fortunately, he passed the independent enrollment exam for the Physics Department of University of Science and Technology of China. After the college entrance exam, when filling out his application, for some sense of ritual, he applied to only one school and one major. This was exactly his favorite and most suitable choice. It was a perfect outcome.

但是让他哭笑不得的是，高考之后，老师对他说：“你如果那时候再听话一点，就能走清华了。”清华北大高于一切，只管学校不管专业，这是典型的衡中思维。黎方谈起这事时，露出难以掩饰的轻蔑神情。
But what was both amusing and frustrating for him was that after the college entrance exam, his teacher told him, “If you had been more obedient back then, you could have gone to Tsinghua.” Tsinghua and Peking University are above all else; they only care about the school, not the major. This is a typical mindset of Hengzhong High School. When Li Fang talked about this matter, he revealed an unmistakable look of disdain.

我们在中科大见到了“出狱”后的黎方，彼时他正在主导一个投入上百万的科研项目。幸运的是，摆脱极端疯狂恢复理性平静后的黎方，发现自己依然还是热爱物理。
We met Li Fang “after his release” at USTC, where he was at that time leading a research project with an investment of over a million. Fortunately, after shedding his extreme madness and regaining rationality and calm, Li Fang found that he still loved physics.

05 如果重来一次
05 If it were to happen all over again

2014年夏天，高考完的林禾青重回衡中，她的身份是高考状元，任务是给高三的学弟学妹做分享。
In the summer of 2014, after completing the college entrance exam, Lin Heqing returned to Hengzhong High School, her identity being the top scorer of the exam, with the task of sharing her experiences with the senior high school juniors and seniors.

以衡中的标准来衡量，黎方和李翰，都是失败者。因为他们本应该考上清华北大的。
By Hengzhong’s standards, Li Fang and Li Han were both failures. Because they were supposed to have been admitted to Tsinghua or Peking University.

林禾青则是成功者。
Lin Heqing, on the other hand, was a success.

在衡中，分析行为与结果的关系，最通用的逻辑是“成王败寇”。
In Hengzhong, the most common logic for analyzing the relationship between behavior and results is “the strong rise to power, the weak fall into ruin.”

“如果我没有考好，他肯定会说，你当时不听我的话你活该吧？但是最后我考好了，就会说这个孩子很有自己的主意，很乐观心很大。”林禾青表现出令人惊讶的坦诚。“高考之前大家水平都差不多，这次考第一的下次可能考三百。所以我觉得高考，运气的成分很大。”
“If I didn’t do well on the exam, he would definitely say, ‘You didn’t listen to me back then, so you deserve it, right?’ But if I ended up doing well, he would say, ‘This child has their own strong opinions and is very optimistic and has a big heart.’” Lin Heqing showed an astonishing level of candor. “Before the college entrance exam, everyone’s level was about the same. The person who ranks first this time might score three hundred next time. So I think the college entrance exam has a lot to do with luck.”

高考之后，林禾青成为衡中的骄傲。像所有衡中的高考状元一样，她获得了中国奥运冠军式的荣誉和褒奖。让我惊奇的是，她清晰的自省力，和对待过去记忆的诚实，没有被“胜者”的身份模糊掉。她对衡中的每一个细节，都做了深入的反思。
After the college entrance exam, Lin Heqing became a source of pride for Hengzhong High School. Like all the college entrance exam top students from Hengzhong, she received the same kind of honor and praise as Chinese Olympic champions. What surprised me was that her clear self-reflection and honesty about past memories were not blurred by the identity of a “winner.” She reflected deeply on every detail of Hengzhong.

林禾青回溯高中年代：“我始终在摸索，自我和环境之间的界限。我不甘心把自己缩在那么小的一个地方，五点半起床，跑步，读书吃饭，吃完饭继续读书，吃饭，睡觉，睡完觉继续读书，读完书又睡觉……这样的三年对我来说，太无聊了。我还有精神世界、自我发展和人格健全。我试图找到一个界限，在这样的氛围和管理中，我能够得到的自我到底有多少？”
Lin Heqing looked back on her high school years: “I was always exploring the boundaries between myself and my environment. I wasn’t willing to confine myself to such a small space—waking up at 5:30, running, studying, eating, studying, eating, sleeping, studying, and then sleeping again… These three years were too boring for me. I had a spiritual world, self-development, and a well-rounded personality. I tried to find a boundary within this atmosphere and management—how much of myself could I retain?”

她渐渐发现，摸索就会越界，越界就会冲突，冲突就会受伤。和环境抗衡，受伤的永远是自己。
She gradually realized that exploring boundaries would lead to overstepping, overstepping would cause conflicts, and conflicts would result in injuries. When you stand up to the environment, the one who always gets hurt is yourself.

每次违纪被叫家长，她都会怀疑自己的人品，怀疑自己犯了天大的错误，是个不孝女。衡中最令她畏惧的是，每一个小小的行为都可以和很大的东西挂钩，上升到人品问题。以至于你上课偷喝牛奶影响到你父母的幸福，你睡觉翻一个身也会影响到你室友的人生。
Every time she gets called by her parents for disciplinary issues, she doubts her character, suspects she has made a huge mistake, and feels like an ungrateful daughter. The most frightening thing about Hengzhong to her is that every small action can be linked to something significant, escalating to a matter of character. To the point where drinking milk in class affects your parents’ happiness, and turning over in bed also affects your roommate’s life.

“我并没有找到那个最大的界限，最后我变成了那个最小的我。”
“I didn’t find that greatest boundary, and in the end, I became the smallest version of myself.”

那个班会课上躲在书堆后面学习的，那个考了前30还不去吃蛋糕的林禾青，并非从一开始就明确“我要为了自己学习”。经过很久的思考和挣扎，她才搞清楚自己为什么不学习，又为什么要学习。
Lin Heqing, who hid behind a stack of books during class discussions and didn’t go for the cake even after ranking in the top 30, didn’t initially know “I want to study for myself.” After a long period of thought and struggle, she finally understood why she didn’t study and why she needed to study.

她设想了另一个情境，如果自己不在衡中，而是在一个普通的高中，那么她肯定会像初中的时候一样，比其他同学都更努力，她是一个并不缺乏自制力的优等生。但是为什么到了衡中，她成了一个叛逆者？
She imagined another scenario: if she wasn’t at Hengzhong but at an ordinary high school, she would definitely work harder than her classmates, like she did in middle school. She is an excellent student who doesn’t lack self-discipline. But why did she become a rebel at Hengzhong?

林禾青给了这样的答案：“在衡中，我表现出对学习不屑一顾的态度，是因为我想要与这个压迫我的环境去抗争。如果你要抗争这个环境，就要抗争这个环境中最强大的东西，那就是学习。这个环境和制度，从上到下，都告诉我要学习，我就只想，我不听你的，我要证明我自己，我要反抗，我不学习。”
Lin Heqing gave the following answer: “At Hengzhong, I showed a disdainful attitude towards studying because I wanted to resist the oppressive environment I was in. If you want to resist this environment, you have to resist the strongest thing in it, which is studying. This environment and system, from top to bottom, tell me to study, and I just want to, I don’t listen to you, I want to prove myself, I want to resist, I don’t study.”

“但是我忽视了一点，学习对我本身来讲是重要的，我自己是想学习的，这是一个矛盾的事情。我那时叛逆，但是很多东西看不清，是为了抗争而抗争，而不是为了自己而抗争。”
“But I overlooked one thing, studying is important to me myself, and I myself want to study, which is a contradiction. I was rebellious back then, but many things were unclear, it was resistance for resistance’s sake, not resistance for oneself.”

时间逼近高考，她不再“为了抗争而抗争”，开始“为了自己而学习”。她尽量不理会整个环境的影响，并最终证明了自己。
As the time for the college entrance exam approached, she no longer “resisted for resistance’s sake” but began to “study for herself.” She tried her best to ignore the influence of the entire environment and ultimately proved herself.

站在台上，林禾青发现，她看着台下的这些人，发自内心地希望他们好好学习，希望他们不要跟环境抗争，希望他们能平平安安地度过高三。那个时候她明白了当初老师们对他们说那些话是为了什么，只是为了让他们学习。
Standing on the stage, Lin Heqing found that she looked at the people below, genuinely hoping they would study hard, hoping they wouldn’t resist the environment, and hoping they could pass their senior year in peace. At that time, she understood why the teachers had said those things to them back then, it was just to make them study.

她把很多话，换了一个说法，讲给学弟学妹们听。她告诉他们：“我高二的时候也总是违纪也很叛逆，因此我很痛苦，影响了我的学习，所以希望你们高三规规矩矩的，不要像我一样痛苦。”
She rephrased many things and told them to her younger classmates: “I was always breaking rules and rebellious during my sophomore year, which caused me a lot of pain and affected my studies, so I hope you guys will be well-behaved during your junior year and don’t suffer like I did.”

“如果让你重新过一遍这三年，你会规规矩矩的吗？”
“If you could relive these three years, would you be well-behaved?”

“不会。”她不假思索地回答。
“No,” she replied without hesitation.

*因作者要求，文中人名均为化名
*As per the author’s request, all names in this article are pseudonyms.

作者王露晓、张紫璇，曾为衡水中学学生
Author Wang Luxiao, Zhang Zixuan, were once students of Hengshui High School

*作者排名不分先后
*Authors listed in no particular order

编辑 | 姚璐
Edited by | Yao Lu

*本文版权属于真实故事计划
*Copyright of this article belongs to Real Story Plan

有钱人大多数是不多吃东西的。 2026-01-03 阅读需要19分钟 这不是我的暴论。
The rich generally do not eat much. 2026-01-03 Reading takes 19 minutes This is not my wild speculation.

这是一个我观察了至少十年，横跨了无数饭局、茶局、私宴后，得出的一个结论。
This is a conclusion I’ve reached after observing for at least a decade, across countless banquets, tea gatherings, and private dinners.

而且，越是那种到了某个层级，特别是那种已经从“术”的勤奋，进化到“道”的层面的人，表现得越是明显。
Moreover, the more one reaches a certain level, especially those who have evolved from the diligence of “technique” to the realm of “philosophy,” the more pronounced this behavior becomes.

……

几年前，我参加过一个规格很高的饭局。
Several years ago, I attended a banquet of very high 规格.

地点在黄浦江边的一个私人会所里，那种不对外开放，只服务于极少数会员的地方。
The location was at a private club by the Huangpu River, a place not open to the public but only serving a select few members.

一桌子人，十几个，谈笑风生，觥筹交错。
A table full of people, about a dozen, were chatting and laughing, with wine glasses clinking.

菜是顶级的，什么东星斑、澳洲鲍，每一道都像艺术品。酒是顶级的，随便一瓶都够普通人奋斗一年。
The food was top-notch, with dishes like Dongxing Spot and Australian Abalone, each one like a piece of art. The wine was also top-tier; any bottle was enough to make an ordinary person work hard for a year.

饭局的主角，是一位我非常敬重的长者，身家不说，只提一句，他投过的几家公司，现在都是我们手机里每天都要打开的App。
The main figure at the dinner party was an elder I held in very high regard. His wealth is not the focus here, but just mention a few companies he invested in, and they are all apps that we open every day on our phones.

大家都在做什么？
What are everyone doing?

A总，做实业的，正高谈阔论，讲他今年如何顶住压力，逆势增长了20%。唾沫横飞，筷子没停过，面前的骨碟已经堆成了小山。
General A, who is in the real industry, is currently making a big show of it, talking about how he withstood pressure and achieved a 20% growth against the trend. He’s spitting out words, his chopsticks haven’t stopped moving, and the small mountain of dishes in front of him is already forming.

B总，搞金融的，正端着酒杯，游走全场，和每个人碰杯，说着场面上的漂亮话，生怕冷落了任何一个“资源”。
General B, who is in finance, is holding a wine glass, walking around the whole place, toasting with everyone, saying nice words for the occasion, making sure not to neglect any “resource.”

C总，互联网新贵，在和主角旁边的人热聊，试图加上微信，聊聊自己的新项目，看看有没有合作的可能。
General C, the new rich kid from the internet industry, is having a heated chat with the person next to the main character, trying to add them on WeChat, talking about his new project, and seeing if there’s a possibility of cooperation.

大家都在“吃”。
Everyone is “eating.”

有的人在吃菜，有的人在吃酒，有的人在吃人脉。
Some are eating food, some are drinking alcohol, and some are “eating” connections.

整个场子，热气腾腾，像一个大型的能量交换市场。
The entire scene is bustling with energy, like a large-scale energy exchange market.

只有一个人是“静止”的。
Only one person is “still.”

就是那位长者。
That is the elderly man.

从头到尾，他面前的骨碟，几乎是干净的。
From beginning to end, the tray in front of him was almost spotless.

大部分时间，他只是端着一杯温热的普洱，静静地听着，偶尔点点头，或者对某个发言的人，投去一个专注的眼神。
Most of the time, he merely held a cup of warm Pu-erh tea, listening quietly, occasionally nodding, or directing a focused gaze toward someone who was speaking.

他的筷子，只在开席时，象征性地动了一两下。
His chopsticks were moved only symbolically a couple of times when the meal started.

别人向他敬酒，他也是以茶代酒，微微一笑，并不多言。
Others toasted him, but he also drank tea instead of wine, smiled faintly, and spoke little.

他就像一个定海神针，坐在那里，整个场子的喧嚣，似乎都绕着他走。
He was like a stabilizing anchor, sitting there, as if the clamor of the entire scene seemed to bypass him.

他明明在场的中心，却又好像在另一个维度。
He was clearly in the center of the action, yet also seemed to exist in another dimension.

当时我年轻，很不理解。
I was young back then and didn’t understand it.

这么好的菜，为什么不吃？是身体不好吗？还是单纯的不饿？或者，这是一种上位者的姿态，一种无声的傲慢？
Why don’t you eat such good food? Is it because you’re not feeling well? Or are you simply not hungry? Or perhaps, this is a posture of someone in a higher position, an silent arrogance?

我甚至觉得，这有点不尊重组织饭局的人。
I even think that this is a bit disrespectful to the people attending the organization’s meal.

……

后来，随着见的人多了，走的城市多了，我发现这根本不是个例，而是一个普遍现象。
Later, as I met more people and traveled to more cities, I found that this is not an isolated case but a common phenomenon.

我见过在杭州龙井村，一个穿着布衣，看起来像个老农，却是某一线投资机构的隐形LP（出资人）。我们在茶农家里喝茶，他可以从早上九点坐到下午四点，中间只吃了主人家端上来的两块蒸米糕。
I have seen in Longjing Village, Hangzhou, a man dressed in simple clothes, looking like an old farmer, but he was actually an invisible LP (investor) of a top-tier investment institution. While drinking tea in the tea farmer’s house, he could sit there from 9 a.m. to 4 p.m., only eating two steamed rice cakes served by the host in the middle.

我见过在西安的一个小院里，一位靠传统手艺做到行业第一的“匠人企业家”。我们聊了整整一个下午，桌上摆满了各种精美的糕点和水果，他自始至终，只喝自己带来的那壶白开水。
I have met a “craftsman entrepreneur” who achieved the top position in his industry through traditional craftsmanship in a small courtyard in Xi’an. We talked for the entire afternoon, with various exquisite pastries and fruits spread on the table, and he only drank the white boiled water he brought with him from start to finish.

我还见过一个90后的天才创业者，公司几年内做到了独角兽。我们约在公司的食堂，他请我吃饭。他自己的餐盘里，只有一小份白灼的青菜，几片鸡胸肉，和半碗米饭。
I have also met a post-90s genius entrepreneur whose company became a unicorn within a few years. We met at the company’s canteen, and he treated me to a meal. In his own plate, there was only a small portion of boiled greens, a few slices of chicken breast, and half a bowl of rice.

我问他，你就吃这个？
I asked him, “Do you just eat this?”

他说，嗯，每天都这么吃，简单，省事，关键是，吃完脑子清楚。
He said, “Yeah, I eat like this every day. It’s simple, convenient, and most importantly, it keeps my mind clear after eating.”

脑子清楚。
Clear-headed.

这四个字，像一道闪电，劈开了我多年的困惑。
These four characters, like a lightning bolt, shattered my years of confusion.

……

我终于明白了。
I finally understood.

他们不是在“节食”，不是在“减肥”，更不是在故作姿态。
They were not “dieting,” not “losing weight,” nor were they putting on an act.

他们是在守护一种比黄金更宝贵的东西——能量。
They are guarding something more precious than gold—energy.

更精确地说，是“心力”的能量。
More precisely, the energy of “heart force.”

我们普通人对能量的理解，太粗浅了。
Our ordinary understanding of energy is too superficial.

我们以为，吃饭就是补充能量。
We think that eating is what replenishes energy.

所以，累了，就想去大吃一顿；饿了，更是要胡吃海喝。
So, when tired, one wants to go on a big feast; and when hungry, one must eat heartily.

我们把身体当成一个“加油站”，以为油加得越满，车跑得越快。
We treat our bodies like a “gas station,” thinking that the fuller the tank, the faster the car runs.

但那些顶级高手，他们把身体当成什么？
But what do those top experts treat their bodies as?

当成一具最精密的“法器”。
As the most precise “tool.”

一个用来感知世界、做出判断、执行决策的“超级传感器”。
A “super sensor” used to perceive the world, make judgments, and execute decisions.

法器，最重要的是什么？
What is the most important aspect of a magical artifact?

是“灵敏”和“洁净”。
It is “sensitivity” and “purity.”

……

你有没有这样的体验？
Have you ever had such an experience?

一顿大酒大肉之后，整个下午，你都处于一种昏昏沉沉的状态。
After a heavy meal of rich food and drink, you were in a drowsy state all afternoon.

脑子像一团浆糊，转不动。
Your mind felt like a bowl of porridge, unable to move.

重要的文件看不进去，复杂的合同算不清账。
You couldn’t focus on important documents, and couldn’t figure out the accounts in complex contracts.

别人跟你说话，你的反应都慢半拍。
When others spoke to you, your responses were half a beat behind.

这时候，别说做什么重大决策了，你连跟老婆吵架都吵不赢。
At this point, forget making major decisions, you can’t even win an argument with your wife.

为什么？
Why?

因为你的身体，正在调动大量的气血能量，去消化胃里那些“沉重”的食物。
Because your body is mobilizing a large amount of qi and blood energy to digest the “heavy” food in your stomach.

你的大脑，被“断电”了。
Your brain has been “depowered.”

用我们老祖宗的话说，这就叫“浊气上涌，蒙蔽清窍”。
In the words of our ancestors, this is called “ turbid qi surging upward, obscuring the clear orifices.”

一个人的肠胃，就是一个“能量处理厂”。
A person’s digestive system is like an “energy processing plant.”

你吃进去的每一口食物，都需要能量去分解、转化、吸收。
Every bite of food you consume requires energy to break down, transform, and absorb.

吃得越多，越油腻，越复杂，这个处理厂的“能耗”就越大。
The more you eat, the richer and more complex the food, the higher the “energy consumption” of this processing plant.

当一个系统（你的身体）的主要能量，都用于“消化存量”时，它必然没有足够的能量，去应对“外部增量”。
When the primary energy of a system (your body) is used to “digest existing stock,” it inevitably lacks sufficient energy to handle “external increments.”

所以，你会感觉疲惫，反应迟钝，思维浑浊。
So, you will feel tired, slow in reaction, and your mind will be muddled.

对于一个普通人来说，这可能只是一个下午的昏沉。
For an ordinary person, this might just be a mid-afternoon slump.

但对于那些执掌着亿万资产、几千上万员工命运的人来说，一次决策的失误，一个判断的偏差，造成的损失可能是灾难性的。
But for those who hold billions in assets and control the fate of thousands or tens of thousands of employees, one wrong decision, one biased judgment, can result in catastrophic losses.

他们承担不起“脑子不清楚”的代价。
They cannot afford the cost of “not thinking clearly.”

所以，他们必须像保护眼睛一样，保护自己大脑的“清晰度”。
So, they must protect the “clarity” of their brains as they would protect their eyes.

而保持清晰度的第一步，就是管住自己的嘴。
The first step to maintaining clarity is to watch what you say.

少吃，吃得干净，吃得简单。
Eat less, eat cleanly, eat simply.

本质上，是为了减少身体这个“系统”的内耗，把宝贵的能量，留给最重要的地方——大脑的思考和决策。
Essentially, it’s to reduce internal friction within the body’s “system,” leaving precious energy for the most important place—the brain’s thinking and decision-making.

这是一种极度清醒的“能量管理学”。
This is an extremely 清醒 form of “energy management.”

……

我有一个朋友，前几年创业，踩中了风口，公司发展得很快。
I have a friend who started a business a few years ago and caught the wave, causing the company to develop rapidly.

人也开始“膨胀”了。
He began to “inflate.”

不仅是心态上的膨胀，也是物理意义上的。
Not just in mindset, but also in a physical sense.

三年时间，体重涨了四十斤。
Three years, weight increased by 40 pounds.

他跟我说，没办法，应酬太多了。
He told me it’s unavoidable, there are too many social engagements.

今天这个局，必须喝；明天那个饭，不去不行。
This gathering today, you must drink; tomorrow’s dinner, you can’t miss.

他觉得，这是在为公司“链接资源”，是在“拓展人脉”。
He thinks, this is “connecting resources” for the company, it’s “expanding his network.”

他吃下的每一口肉，喝下的每一口酒，都成了他所谓的“社交成本”。
Every mouthful of meat he ate and every sip of wine he drank became what he called his “social cost.”

结果呢？
What about it?

去年，市场环境一变，公司立刻陷入了困境。
Last year, when the market environment changed, the company immediately fell into difficulties.

他想找那些“酒肉朋友”帮忙，发现一个个都躲得远远的。
He wanted to ask those “wine and meat friends” for help, but found that they were all avoiding him.

公司内部，问题也集中爆发。他每天焦头烂额，却总是抓不住重点。
Internally, problems also broke out in full force. He was in a constant state of stress, yet he could never grasp the key points.

他跟我打电话，语音里充满了疲惫和迷茫。
He called me, his voice filled with exhaustion and confusion.

他说，一凡，我觉得我脑子不够用了，每天都很累，但什么问题都解决不了。
He said, “Yifan, I feel like my brain isn’t enough, I’m very tired every day, but I can’t solve any problems.”

我当时只回了他一句话：
At that moment, I only replied with one sentence:

“把你那些无效的饭局停掉，每天晚上去跑步，一个月后再来找我。”
“Stop those pointless dinner parties and go running every night. Come see me after a month.”

他照做了。
He did as he was told.

第一个月，他瘦了十五斤。
In the first month, he lost fifteen pounds.

他跟我说，最明显的感觉不是瘦了，而是脑子清醒了。
He told me the most noticeable change wasn’t just losing weight, but that his mind became clearer.

以前看不懂的报表，现在能看到问题了。
Reports that were previously hard to understand now reveal the problems.

以前想不通的症结，现在有思路了。
The issues that were previously confusing now have a clear solution.

以前觉得千头万绪，现在能分清主次了。
What seemed like a tangled mess before can now be prioritized effectively.

他没有变聪明，他只是通过减少身体的“食耗”，把本该属于大脑的能量，还给了大脑。
He didn’t become smarter; he simply reduced his body’s “energy consumption,” returning the energy that should have been allocated to the brain back to it.

……

这个道理，如果仅仅停留在“食物”的层面，那格局就小了。
This principle, if it merely stays at the level of “food,” shows a narrow perspective.

这背后，是一套更底层的、关于如何与这个世界相处的“心法”。
Behind this lies a more fundamental “mindset” about how to interact with the world.

那些顶级高手“不多吃”的，不仅仅是食物。
What the top experts “don’t eat” excessively is not just food.

他们对一切“信息”的摄入，也同样克制。
They are equally restrained in their intake of all “information.”

你看看我们大多数人，每天在做什么？
Take a look at what most of us do every day?

早上醒来，先刷半小时短视频。
Wake up in the morning and spend the first half hour watching short videos.

上班路上，听各种“三分钟读完一本书”的音频。
On the way to work, listen to various audio programs like “read a book in three minutes.”

工作间隙，在无数个微信群里，追逐着每一个热点八卦。
During work breaks, in countless WeChat groups, chasing every hot gossip.

晚上回家，躺在沙发上，任由算法把一个个刺激你感官的视频，喂到你嘴边。
Coming home at night, lying on the sofa, letting algorithms feed stimulating videos to your senses one after another.

我们像一个永不饱足的饕餮，疯狂地吞噬着各种信息。
We are like insatiable gluttons, devouring various kinds of information crazily.

我们以为，知道得越多，懂得就越多。
We think that the more we know, the more we understand.

我们以为，这是在学习，在成长。
We think that this is learning, that this is growth.

这其实，是一种“信息暴食症”。
This is actually a kind of “information gluttony.”

你吃进去的，大多是高热量、无营养的“信息垃圾”。
What you consume is mostly high-calorie, nutritionless “information junk.”

它们除了占据你的大脑内存，撩拨你的情绪，消耗你的注意力，还有什么用？
Besides occupying your brain’s memory, stirring up your emotions, and consuming your attention, what use do they have?

这些碎片化的、不成体系的、充满情绪和偏见的信息，不会让你变得更智慧，只会让你变得更焦虑、更浮躁、更自以为是。
These fragmented, non-systematic, emotionally and biased pieces of information won’t make you wiser; they will only make you more anxious, more restless, and more self-assuming.

你的大脑，就像一个被各种剩菜塞满的冰箱，塞得满满当-，看起来很丰富，但真正有营养的、能解决问题的食材，一个都没有。
Your brain, like a refrigerator stuffed full of all kinds of leftovers, looks very rich, but it doesn’t have a single nutritious or problem-solving ingredient.

而那些高手呢？
And what about the experts?

他们对信息的摄入，极为挑剔，甚至可以说“吝啬”。
They are extremely selective about the information they consume, and one could even say they are “stingy.”

他们可能一年也读不了几本书，但每一本，都是经典，都会反复读，读到骨子里去。
They might not read more than a few books a year, but each one is a classic, and they read them repeatedly, delving deep into their essence.

他们可能对网络上的热点一无所知，但对自己领域内的核心变量，了如指掌。
They might be completely unaware of the hot topics online, but they are well-versed in the core variables within their field.

他们会刻意屏蔽掉99%的无效信息，只为保护那1%的专注力，去思考那些真正重要的问题。
They will deliberately filter out 99% of useless information, just to protect that 1% of focused attention, to think about the truly important issues.

一个人，每天只有三到四个小时的高质量专注时间。
A person only has three to four hours of high-quality focused time each day.

这是我们最宝贵的“心力资产”。
This is our most valuable “mental asset.”

你是把它用来刷短视频、追热点，还是用来啃一本硬书，攻克一个难题？
Are you using it to watch short videos and follow trends, or to 啃 a hard book and tackle a difficult problem?

不同的选择，决定了不同的人生。
Different choices determine different lives.

所谓“认知”，不是你知道了多少信息。
The so-called “cognition” is not how much information you know.

而是你处理信息、洞察本质的能力。
But your ability to process information and see the essence.

一个被“信息垃圾”塞满的大脑，是没有处理能力的。
A brain stuffed with “information 垃圾” has no processing capacity.

就像一个被撑坏的胃，它已经丧失了消化的功能。
Like a stretched-out stomach, it has lost its digestive function.

“少吃”信息，定期“断食”，才能让你的大脑，恢复敏锐和洞察。
“Consume less” information, regularly “fast,” to restore your brain’s sharpness and insight.

……

再往深一层。
Go deeper.

他们“不多吃”的，还有“关系”和“机会”。
They also value “not overeating,” “relationships,” and “opportunities.”

很多人觉得，人脉就是钱脉，朋友越多越好。
Many people believe that connections are equivalent to financial resources, and the more friends one has, the better.

于是，他们热衷于参加各种圈子，混各种社群，手机里存了几千个好友，每天点赞、评论、维系。
Thus, they are keen on joining various circles, mingling in different communities, and having thousands of friends stored in their phones, constantly liking, commenting, and maintaining these relationships.

这就像一个社交上的“自助餐”，你以为你认识了很多人，拿了很多“菜”，其实没几样是你能真正“消化”的。
This is like a “buffet” in socializing; you think you’ve met many people and taken many “dishes,” but in reality, there are few that you can truly “digest.”

你把大量的能量，耗费在了这种“弱连接”的维护上。
You have spent a lot of energy maintaining these “weak connections.”

结果就是，你需要帮助的时候，没几个人靠得住。
The result is that when you need help, few people can be relied upon.

而那些高手，他们的社交圈子，往往出奇地简单。
And those experts, their social circles are often surprisingly simple.

三五个知己，几个能深度交流的同道。
Three or five close friends, a few peers who can engage in deep conversations.

他们不追求数量，追求质量。
They pursue quality, not quantity.

他们把有限的社交能量，投入到那些能彼此滋养、相互成就的“深度关系”里。
They invest their limited social energy into “deep relationships” that can mutually nourish and 成就 each other.

这是一种关系的“少食多餐”。
This is a “less is more” approach to relationships.

机会，也是同理。
The same applies to opportunities.

对于一个上升期的平台或个人，外界会涌来无数的“机会”。
For a rising platform or individual, countless “opportunities” will pour in from the outside.

这个项目能赚钱，那个合作有前景。
This project can make money, that cooperation has prospects.

很多人会觉得，机会来了，要抓住。
Many people will think that opportunities have come, and they need to seize them.

于是，什么都想做，什么都去尝试。
Thus, they want to do everything and try everything.

就像一个饿了三天的人，冲进自助餐厅，看到什么都往盘子里装，最后把自己活活撑死。
Just like a person starved for three days, rushing into a buffet, putting everything they see into their plate, and ultimately suffocating themselves to death.

我见过太多有才华的创业者，不是死于没有机会，而是死于机会太多，抓不住重点，耗尽了所有资源。
I’ve seen too many talented entrepreneurs who didn’t die from a lack of opportunities, but rather from having too many, unable to focus on the key points, and exhausting all their resources.

而高手，面对机会，就像面对一桌满汉全席。
While high-level experts face opportunities, it’s like facing a full Han Chinese banquet.

他有定力。
They have the composure.

他清楚地知道，自己的“胃”（核心能力和资源）能消化什么。
He clearly knows what his “stomach” (core capabilities and resources) can digest.

他会耐心地观察，等待，直到那道最适合自己、最有价值的“主菜”上来。
He will patiently wait and wait until the most suitable and valuable “main course” comes along.

然后，精准出击，全力以赴。
Then, strike precisely, go all out.

其他的九十九道菜，哪怕再诱人，他也能做到视而不见。
The other ninety-nine dishes, no matter how tempting, he can do his best to turn a blind eye.

这种“不吃”的定力，背后是对自身“能力圈”的深刻认知，和对“长期价值”的极致聚焦。
The discipline of “not eating,” stems from a profound understanding of one’s “circle of competence” and an extreme focus on “long-term value.”

……

所以，你看。
So, you see.

从“不吃食物”，到“不吃信息”，再到“不吃关系”和“不吃机会”。
From “not eating food,” to “not consuming information,” and then to “not pursuing relationships” and “not chasing opportunities.”

这背后，贯穿着一条完全相同的底层逻辑：
Behind all of this lies the same fundamental logic.

通过极度的“克制”和“收敛”，来守护核心能量，然后把它“聚焦”在最有价值的地方。
By extreme “restraint” and “reduction,” protect the core energy, then “focus” it on the most valuable places.

这是一种人生的“能量战略”。
This is a “energy strategy” of life.

食物吃多了，伤的是脾胃，耗的是身体能量。
Eating too much harms the spleen and stomach, consuming the body’s energy.

信息吃多了，伤的是心智，耗的是专注力。
Taking in too much information harms the mind, consuming focus.

关系和机会吃多了，伤的是战略，耗的是企业的核心生命力。
Relationships and opportunities in excess harm strategy and deplete a company’s core vitality.

这个世界，永远是嘈杂的，充满诱惑的。
This world is always noisy and full of temptations.

它试图用各种方式，来消耗你。
It tries to consume you in various ways.

用美食，消耗你的健康。
With delicious food, it consumes your health.

用垃圾信息，消耗你的专注。
With junk information, consume your focus.

用无效社交，消耗你的时间。
With 无效社交, consume your time.

用虚假机会，消耗你的资源。
With false opportunities, consume your resources.

而真正的成长，真正的强大，不是去获取更多，而是学会“拒绝”。
And true growth, true strength, is not about acquiring more, but learning to “reject.”

是建立起一道强大的“心力结界”。
Establish a powerful “mental barrier.”

结界之内，是你需要死死守住的核心。
Within the barrier, is the core you must firmly hold onto.

结界之外，是那些需要你断然拒绝的九成九的“噪音”和“诱惑”。
Outside the barrier, are the ninety-nine percent of “noise” and “temptations” that require you to resolutely refuse.

一个人，能拒绝的东西越多，他的能量就越聚焦。
The more a person can refuse, the more focused their energy becomes.

能量越聚焦，他的力量就越强大。
The more focused the energy, the stronger his power becomes.

……

很多人问我，一凡，你说得都对，可我做不到啊。
Many people ask me, Yifan, you are right, but I can’t do it.

看到好吃的，就忍不住。
Can’t help but eat when seeing something delicious.

看到手机，就想刷。
Can’t help but scroll when seeing the phone.

看到别人赚钱，就焦虑。
Worrying when seeing others make money.

怎么办？
What should you do?

这说明，你的“心智操作系统”，版本太低了。
This indicates that your “mental operating system” version is too low.

还在用“本能”和“情绪”来驱动自己的人生。
You are still using “instinct” and “emotion” to drive your life.

你需要一次彻底的“认知升级”。
You need a thorough “cognitive upgrade.”

你需要一套更强大的“思维模型”，来帮你重塑你看待世界、看待自己的方式。
You need a more powerful “thinking model” to help you reshape how you view the world and yourself.

你需要重新建立你的“认知地基”。
You need to rebuild your “cognitive foundation.”

这正是我过去几年一直在做的事情。
This is exactly what I have been doing over the past few years.

我把那些从古今中外的经典里，从行走大地的见闻里，从无数次的与人交谈的感悟里，提炼、萃取出的50个顶级思维模型，写成了一部30万字的电子书，叫《格物心法》。
I have written an e-book of 300,000 words called “The Method of Investigating Things,” which contains 50 top-tier thinking models I have refined and extracted from classic literature across ancient and modern times, from the experiences of those who traverse the land, and from countless conversations with others.

它不是一本教你“术”的书，比如如何沟通，如何赚钱。
It is not a book that teaches you “techniques,” such as how to communicate or how to make money.

它是一本帮你重装“心智操作系统”的“心法之书”。
It is a “method book” that helps you reinstall your “mental operating system.”

它分为五大阶梯，从“清扫心智，建立认知地基”开始，到“决策模型，优化人生选择”，再到“系统思维，洞察万物之联”，“博弈与概率，驾驭不确定性”，最后达到“智慧圆融，活出通透人生”。
It is divided into five stages, starting with “Cleaning the Mind and Establishing Cognitive Foundations,” moving on to “Decision Models and Optimizing Life Choices,” then “Systems Thinking and Insight into the Connections of All Things,” “Game Theory and Probability, Mastering Uncertainty,” and finally reaching “Wisdom and Perfection, Living a 通透 Life.”

比如，我们今天聊到的“克制”，在《格物心法》里，你可以通过学习“能力圈模型”，清晰地画出自己的边界，知道什么该做，什么不该做。
For example, the concept of “restraint” we discussed today, in the “Method of Inquiry,” you can clearly define your boundaries by learning the “Circle of Competence model,” knowing what to do and what not to do.

你可以通过学习“奥卡姆剃刀模型”，一刀砍掉99%的复杂念头和无效信息，让你的思考变得极简、高效。
You can also learn the “Occam’s Razor model,” cut off 99% of complex thoughts and useless information with one stroke, making your thinking extremely minimalist and efficient.

你也可以通过学习“控制二分法模型”，把能量从那些你无法控制的“关注圈”，收回到你能掌控的“影响力圈”，从而戒掉绝大部分的焦虑。
You can also learn the “Control Dichotomy model,” redirect energy from the “Circle of Concern” you cannot control back to the “Circle of Influence” you can control, thereby eliminating most of your anxiety.

这50个模型，就像50把钥匙，帮你打开一扇扇通往事物本质的大门。
These 50 models are like 50 keys, helping you open doors to the essence of things.

但光有书还不够，成长是一条需要同伴的路。
But having books is not enough; growth is a path that requires companionship.

所以我创立了【长青盟】社群。
So I founded the 【Evergreen Alliance】community.

在这里，我们每周会有一节体系大课，带你把《格物心法》里的模型，揉碎了，掰开了，结合当下的案例，一点点吃透。
Here, we have a systematic major course every week, guiding you to break down the models from the 《Method of Inquiry》 into pieces, analyze them, and combine them with current cases to fully master them bit by bit.

在这里，有一群和你一样，渴望成长、追求精神富足的同路人。
Here, there is a group of fellow travelers like you, who are eager to grow and pursue spiritual fulfillment.

我们不搞无效社交，我们只做深度的认知共振。
We don’t engage in meaningless social interactions; we only create deep cognitive resonance.

你遇到的困惑，你的思考，都可以在这里得到回应和启发。
Your confusions and thoughts can all be responded to and inspired here.

我们希望陪伴每一位成长型女性，以品质健康生活为基石，以精神富足为内核，最终成长为能够持续盈利的超级个体。
We hope to accompany every growth-oriented woman, with a healthy lifestyle as the foundation and spiritual fulfillment as the core, ultimately growing into a super individual capable of sustained profitability.

每年包含了一整年52节体系大课，以及这本超10万字的《格物心法》电子书精华版。
Each year includes a full-year 52-session core course, as well as the essential version of the e-book “The Method of Inquiry,” with over 100,000 words.

这可能，是你为自己的“认知系统”所做的，最有价值的一笔投资。
This could be the most valuable investment you make for your “cognitive system.”

如果你渴望像那些高手一样，建立起自己强大的“心力结界”，活出清醒、聚焦、有力量的人生，那么欢迎你来。
If you aspire to build your own powerful “heart-mind sanctuary,” like those experts, and live a clear, focused, and empowered life, then welcome to join us.

你可以点击头像看主页简介最后一行，找到加入「长青盟」社群、获取《格物心法》的方式。
You can click on the avatar to see the homepage introduction, find the last line to join the ‘Evergreen Alliance’ community, and get the way to obtain 《The Method of Inquiry》.

……

回到我们最初的那个场景。
Back to our original scenario.

那个在喧闹饭局上，只喝着一杯清茶的长者。
The elder who only drank a cup of plain tea at the noisy banquet.

我现在终于懂得了他那份“静止”里，蕴含的巨大力量。
I finally understand the immense power contained in his “stillness.”

那不是傲慢，而是一种深刻的慈悲。
It was not arrogance, but a profound compassion.

对自己生命的慈悲。
Compassion for one’s own life.

他不让多余的食物，去浊乱自己的气血。
He does not allow excess food to pollute and disrupt his qi and blood.

不让无效的言语，去扰乱自己的心神。
He does not allow useless words to disturb his mind and spirit.

他把自己活成了一口“深井”。
He lives his life like a “deep well.”

外界的风，吹不动。
The wind of the outside cannot move.

外界的雨，落不进。
The rain of the outside cannot enter.

井水，永远清澈、宁静，深不可测。
The well water is always clear and tranquil, unfathomable deep.

这口井，滋养着他自己，也滋养着所有靠近他的人。
This well nourishes himself and also nourishes all those who are close to him.

而我们大多数人，都活成了一个“池塘”。
And most of us live as if in a “pond.”

任何一点风雨，都能让池水浑浊。
A little wind or rain can make the pond water murky.

任何人丢一块石头，都能在水面掀起涟漪。
Anyone throwing a stone can create ripples on the surface.

我们看似热闹，实则充满了不确定性。
We seem lively, but are actually full of uncertainty.

从“池塘”活成“深井”，这是一场漫长而深刻的修行。
From “pond” to “well”, this is a long and profound practice.

而这场修行的起点，或许，就是从下一顿饭，你主动少夹的那一筷子菜开始。
And the starting point of this practice may be as simple as taking one less piece of food from your next meal.

真正的自由，不是想吃什么就吃什么，而是可以轻松地做到“不吃”。
True freedom is not about eating whatever you want, but about being able to easily choose “not to eat.”

对食物如此。
The same goes for food.

对欲望、对信息、对一切外物，皆是如此。
It is the same with desires, information, and everything external.

这，才是成年人世界里，最高级的自律，和最深刻的自由。
This is the highest level of self-discipline and the deepest freedom in the adult world.

声明：本文来自《一凡日记》专栏
Statement: This article is from the column “Yifan Diary”

文章时常被删屏蔽，如有收获，可在评论区获取本篇《一凡日记》5000字PDF版
The article is often deleted or censored. If you gain something, you can get the 5000-word PDF version of this “Yifan Diary” in the comments.

我是一凡，长青盟创始人、源头日记合伙人
I am Wei Fan, founder of the Evergreen Alliance and partner of Source Diary.

长青盟，是专为成长型女性打造的终身成长社群。
Evergreen Alliance is a lifelong growth community created specifically for growth-oriented women.

我们不止是一个社群，更是一个深度融合了「私域电商」x「知识付费」x「自媒体赋能」的完整成长生态。
It is not just a community, but a complete growth ecosystem that deeply integrates ‘private domain e-commerce’ x ‘knowledge payment’ x ‘influencer empowerment’.

我们陪伴你，以品质健康生活为基石，以精神富足为内核，最终成长为能够持续盈利的超级个体。
We accompany you, with quality and healthy living as the foundation, spiritual fulfillment as the core, ultimately growing into a super individual capable of sustainable profitability.

很多有钱人，为什么都不愿生活在东大？ 2026-01-07 阅读需要5分钟 部分超级聪明，但并没有什么信仰和理想的人，是很不愿意生活在东大的！
Why are many wealthy people unwilling to live in Dongda? 2026-01-07 Reading time: 5 minutes Some super intelligent people, but without much faith or ideals, are very reluctant to live in Dongda!

因为他们够聪明，如果在一个彻底社会达尔文主义的国度，他们就能肆意扩张，把弱肉强食发挥到极致，掠夺大量的财富和名誉，毫无顾忌为所欲为，将所有不够聪明的普通人变成他们的养料，把他们吸个一干二净，自己赚得盆满钵盈，迅速走上人生巅峰。
Because they are smart enough. If in a completely social Darwinist country, they can expand at will, taking the survival of the fittest to its extreme, plundering vast wealth and reputation, acting without restraint, turning all the not-so-smart ordinary people into their food, sucking them dry, making a fortune, and quickly reaching the peak of their lives.

这就是资本社会提倡的民主自由的真谛–国家不设法保护弱者，不干扰社会价值取向，大家自由发展，各凭本事，成王败寇，落子无悔。
This is the true essence of democracy and freedom advocated by capitalist society—where the state does not make an effort to protect the weak, does not interfere with social value orientation, everyone develops freely, succeeds or fails based on their abilities, and once a move is made, there is no turning back.

但是在东大，事情却不是这样。你可以创作，但不能歪屁股，可以赚钱，但不能无节制。
However, things are different at East University. You can create, but you cannot go against the grain, you can make money, but you cannot do so without restraint.

比如前些年某蚂蚁上市被阻，马某跳脚，一般老百姓很不理解，认为他挣的钱已经让他这辈子都足够花了，所以他那些行为真的都是为了“帮助中小企业”，好一个心怀天下的”人民富豪”。
For example, a few years ago when the Ant Group’s IPO was blocked, Ma Xueyuan jumped up and down. The general public couldn’t understand it, thinking that the money he had already earned was enough for him to live a lifetime. So, his actions were really all for “helping small and medium-sized enterprises.” What a “people’s tycoon” with a heart for the nation!

可惜知情者很快就揭了他的老底，他那一套也只不过是华尔街玩儿剩下的，甚至可能引发次贷危机的资本套利，对社会和老百姓是贻害无穷，而老百姓只能看到眼前的花呗余额看涨，被人卖了还要帮看人家数钱。
Unfortunately, those in the know quickly exposed his old tricks. His schemes were just leftovers from Wall Street, and they might even have triggered capital arbitrage that could lead to a subprime crisis. This was incredibly harmful to society and the public, but the people could only see their Huabei account balances rising. They were being sold and yet had to help count the money for the seller.

已关注
Already following

于是，马某和老百姓居然站在了同一边，看起来
Thus, Ma Xueyuan and the public were actually on the same side. It seemed like

氛围一片和谐，顺风顺水，眼看着这波源源不绝的韭菜已经要被割进马某兜里了。结果，国家的铁拳一来，一切化为乌有。
The atmosphere is harmonious, everything is going smoothly, and it looks like this endless flow of wheat has almost been cut into Ma’s pocket. But, as soon as the country’s iron fist arrives, everything turns to nothing.

你要是马某你气不气？气死了！我凭本事骗的钱，人家苦主都没意见，居然跑来个第三方给我卡了脖子，我这首富当的还有什么意思？
If you were Ma, wouldn’t you be angry? Extremely angry! The money I earned through my own skills, and the main victims didn’t even object, yet a third party comes to cut off my card. What’s the point of being a rich man like this?

哎，对了，在中国当首富，就是这么没意思。
Oh, by the way, being the richest in China is just so meaningless.

有人可能会说资本主义的社会福利和保障，做的很好，其实这个真的是有得一说，这就是他们的聪明之处。
Some might say that capitalist society’s social welfare and security are done very well. Actually, this is something that really deserves mentioning, and this is where their cleverness lies.

你想想，假如我想奴役一个人，我把这个人掠夺一空，这个人为了活下去一定就会跟我作对，这样肯定是不行的。用汤师爷的话来说，不能拼命，拼命还怎么赚钱啊？
Think about it, if I wanted to enslave someone, I would strip them of everything. They would surely oppose me for survival, which is definitely not feasible. As Master Tang would say, you can’t go all out; how can you make money if you do?

那怎么办呢？发福利呀！我不给你好工作，让你的孩子没钱上私立学校，在公立学校推广快乐教育，让他们毕业以后只能去端盘子洗车为我们服务，或者沦为流浪汉，然后再从我们的手里漏下去一些小费，再补贴点儿福利，让这群人的日子过得下去，也没啥进取和反抗的动力，每天快乐的做韭菜给我割。
So what then? Give benefits! I won’t give you good jobs, so your children can’t afford private school, and promote “happy education” in public schools, so they can only work as waiters and car washers to serve us after graduation, or become homeless. Then, we’ll let some tips slip through our hands, supplemented with a bit of welfare, so these people can get by, with no motivation to advance or resist, happily serving as the “cabbage” I harvest every day.

太平年景，看起来一派和谐。而到了灾年，需要我让出一定的利益去救助这些韭菜的时候，我肯定敬谢不敏，拼命宣传民主自由，让他们继续在我这儿消费给我割，等他们死了再开放一波移民，瞬间满血，毫无损失，还能再捞一笔。他们还得谢谢我。我要是一直有政府惯着送钱，我也不会劳动，到头来也是穷人。
In peaceful times, everything looks harmonious. But in years of disaster, when I need to give up some benefits to help these “cabbages,” I will certainly decline with gratitude. I’ll vigorously promote democracy and freedom, keeping them consuming and serving me until they die, then open up another wave of immigration, instantly full of health, with no losses, and even making another profit. They will have to thank me. If I were always supported by the government with free money, I wouldn’t work either, and in the end, I’d still be poor.

可能也有人会说，那按我的逻辑，聪明人都跑到国外去了，那中国是怎么发展到现在这种程度？
Some might also say, according to my logic, the smart people have all left for abroad, so how has China developed to this level?

请注意，我文中所鄙夷的这种人，是聪明但没有理想和信仰的人，但在我们中国，从来不缺真正有理想有信仰，并且能力强过所有这些“无耻的聪明人”的英雄，他们才是我们民族的脊梁。
Please note that the kind of people I despise in my writing are intelligent but lack ideals and beliefs. However, in China, we never lack heroes who truly have ideals and beliefs, and who are stronger in ability than all these “shameless smart people.” They are the backbone of our nation.

有人在网上抱怨，中国工作又累挣得还少，人家美国工作轻松时薪又高，说明人家制度更完善、更保护弱者嘛！
Some people complain online that working in China is exhausting yet poorly paid, while in America, jobs are easy and offer high hourly wages, indicating that the American system is more perfect and better at protecting the weak!

我的天，我简直惊讶于很多人对社会认知的浅薄程度–你一个刚成立的泥腿子公司，还没咋发展，倒先想跟人家发展多年的行业龙头比福利，那你还拿什么跟他们竞争？发展中国家，这五个字哪个不好认？
Good heavens, I am simply amazed at how shallow many people’s understanding of society is–You’ve just established a humble subsidiary, haven’t even developed it much, yet you want to compare benefits with industry giants who have been around for years. What will you compete with then? Which word in the phrase “developing country” is hard to recognize?

知道什么美国的亚裔生活水平最高吗？因为亚裔很拼，第一代端盘子，第二代开饭店，第三代供孩子考试当医生律师，直接进入社会上层。
Do you know which Asian Americans have the highest standard of living in the U.S.? Because Asian Americans work hard; the first generation works as waiters, the second opens restaurants, the third funds their children’s education to become doctors and lawyers, directly entering the upper echelons of society.

大家刚来的时候都是穷人，亚裔还不能享受很多美国给少数族裔的福利，但是却只有亚裔最后混得最好，他们难道真的比红脖子墨裔非裔聪明吗？
Everyone started as poor when they first arrived, and Asian Americans couldn’t enjoy many of the benefits given to minorities by the U.S. Yet, only Asian Americans ended up doing the best. Are they really smarter than rednecks, Hispanic, and Black people?

不是的，是因为他们没有把时间放在抗议求福利和”零元购”上。我也希望，有一天我们的国家可以真正发展起来，人人不用辛苦，也能舒舒服服的生活，但如今我们还没实现全部脱贫目标，很多人还在艰难跋涉，很多东西还在野蛮发展。
No, it’s because they didn’t waste their time protesting for benefits and “shoplifting for free.” I also hope that one day our country can truly develop, where everyone doesn’t have to work hard and can live comfortably, but right now we haven’t fully achieved our goal of eliminating poverty, and many people are still struggling, and many things are still developing in a wild manner.

这些都是问题，都需要解决，我们不会像当年的美国，将矛盾通过战争转移到国外，压迫第三世界吸血维持奢侈生活。
These are all problems that need to be solved. We won’t be like the U.S. back then, transferring conflicts through war to foreign countries, oppressing the third world to maintain a luxurious lifestyle.

我们只会自己一步一个脚印的往前走，这不是我们的愚蠢，而是我们的骄傲。如果前路有山，那么，就把山移走。
We will only take steps forward one by one. This isn’t our stupidity, but our pride. If there are mountains ahead, then move the mountains.

为什么“慢即是快”是穷人的顶层逻辑？ 2026-01-05 阅读需要9分钟 如果只看表面，交易好像是穷人最容易心动的一条路：不用背景、不看学历、不拼人脉关系，只要一台电脑、一根网线，就能和全世界的人站在同一个盘面前面。这种“看起来公平”的感觉，对很多出身普通的人来说，简直像一道光：现实世界到处是门槛，唯独这里仿佛谁都能试一试。可我这些年越做交易，越清楚一点——对普通人来说，交易不是捷径，它更像是一面极其残忍的镜子，会放大你的急躁、侥幸、懒惰，也会放大你对“慢”的抗拒。
Why is “Slow is Fast” the Top Logic for the Poor? 2026-01-05 Reading takes 9 minutes If you only look at the surface, trading seems to be the easiest path that attracts the poor: no background check, no education degree, no need to rely on connections—just a computer and an internet connection, and you can stand at the same table as people from all over the world. This “seems fair” feeling is like a light to many ordinary people: the real world is full of barriers, but here it seems like anyone can give it a try. But over the years, the more I trade, the clearer it becomes—trading is not a shortcut for ordinary people; it’s more like a brutally honest mirror that magnifies your impatience,侥幸, laziness, and also your resistance to “slow.”

很多人幻想从市场里分一杯羹，但很少有人愿意承认一个事实：这里不是“普通人的游乐场”，而是全球天才、机构、顶尖选手长期厮杀的战场。现实生活里，大部分人都没耐心把一门手艺打磨到极致，到了交易市场，就更指望不可能的事情发生——既不肯系统学基础，不愿意把逻辑啃透，更坐不住去搭一套属于自己的方法，却希望靠几次“感觉还行”的出手，换来一个体面的结果。你只要想象一下：你在现实生活中一门专业都没有学透过，却跑去和全世界顶级选手拼技巧，这事本身就不太讲道理。
Many people dream of carving out a piece of the market, but few are willing to admit a fact: this is not a “playground for ordinary people,” but a battlefield where global geniuses, institutions, and top players have been fighting for a long time. In real life, most people don’t have the patience to polish a skill to perfection, and in the trading market, it’s even more impossible to expect—neither willing to systematically learn the basics, nor willing to thoroughly understand the logic, nor willing to sit still to build their own method, yet hoping to achieve a decent result with a few “seems good” trades. Just imagine: you haven’t mastered any profession in real life, yet you run to compete with the world’s top players in skills—this itself is not very logical.

真正想在交易上活下去，难度远比大多数人以为的高。你要学最基础的价格结构，要理解多种周期之间是怎么联动的，要明白风险控制、仓位管理背后的数学逻辑，要知道系统为什么成立、在什么环境下会失效，还要在各种方法里试错，最终收敛成一套适合自己的风格。更难的是，你还得每天和自己的情绪打交道：贪心、恐惧、不甘心、报复心理、短期输赢的起伏感，都要一点点被拆解、被看见，然后想办法放到系统里去规训。如果说现实里学一门技术要花三五年，那交易这套东西，老老实实啃下来，难度只高不低。可是绝大多数人来到市场时的心情不是“我准备用几年学”，而是“我先试试能不能快一点看到结果”。从这个起点出发，很难不被市场教育。
The real challenge of surviving in trading is far higher than most people think. You need to learn the most basic price structures, understand how multiple cycles are interconnected, grasp the mathematical logic behind risk control and position management, know why systems work and under what conditions they fail, and test various methods to converge into a style that suits you. What’s even harder is that you have to deal with your emotions every day: greed, fear, unwillingness, revenge mentality, the ups and downs of short-term wins and losses, all need to be gradually dissected, seen, and then figured out how to regulate them within the system. If learning a skill in real life takes three or five years, then mastering this trading thing, if you work hard at it, the difficulty only increases. But the mood of most people when they come to the market is not “I plan to spend a few years learning,” but “I’ll try to see if I can get results quickly.” Starting from this point, it’s hard not to be educated by the market.

当然，交易本身也有它独特的好处，这一点我从来不否认。放在整个社会结构里，它算是比较少见的“相对公平”的领域：不需要你认识谁，不需要你挤进什么圈子，只要你愿意慢慢练，你的决策和别人一样可以直接对接到市场；没有人会因为你家境普通就不让你下单，也不会因为你没有背景就不让你盈利。这和很多传统行业不一样，很多岗位一开始就要看履历、看出身、看资源，很多门是关着的。交易的门看起来是敞开的，这是它吸引人的地方，也是它最危险的地方——因为门太容易进去，很多人就更懒得为“进去之后的那条漫长路”做准备。
Of course, the transaction itself also has its unique advantages, and I never deny that. Placed within the entire social structure, it can be considered a relatively rare field of “relative fairness”: you don’t need to know anyone, you don’t need to 挤进什么圈子, as long as you are willing to practice slowly, your decisions can be directly connected to the market; no one will refuse you an order because of your ordinary background, nor will they prevent you from profiting because you lack connections. This is different from many traditional industries, where many positions require resumes, background, and resources from the start, and many doors are shut. The door to transactions seems open, which is why it is attractive, but also its most dangerous aspect—because it’s too easy to get in, many people are even lazier about preparing for the “long road ahead” once they’re in.

所以我一直觉得，交易其实给普通人上了一个很重要的课：真正的“顶层逻辑”不是哪种秘密信号，也不是某种玄学方法，而是四个字——慢即是快。如果你连在现实生活中都没有学会慢慢打磨一门手艺，几乎不可能指望在交易这种高压、高难度的地方，突然变成一个极度自律、有系统、有耐心的人。一个连三年、五年都不肯安安静静钻研一门技术的人，想在这样一个战场里，靠两三个月、两三次“灵光一现”改变轨迹，这本身就是一种巨大的误判。
That’s why I’ve always believed that trading actually teaches ordinary people an important lesson: the true “top-level logic” isn’t about secret signals or mystical methods, but four words—slow is fast. If you haven’t learned to slowly hone a craft in real life, it’s almost impossible to suddenly become extremely disciplined, systematic, and patient in the high-pressure, high-difficulty world of trading. A person who won’t quietly study a technology for three or five years, thinking they can change their trajectory in this battlefield with just two or three “eureka moments” in two or three months, is itself a huge miscalculation.

往回看人生，尤其是出身普通的年轻人，我越来越相信：二十到三十岁，对普通人最重要的，不是“赶紧把钱挣够”，而是“选一门东西，慢慢把它打磨到别人离不开你”。这个东西可以是写作、设计、编程、拍摄、手工、维修、厨艺，也可以是某个行业里的细分技术，它本身没有高低贵贱之分，区别只在于你愿不愿意把它当成一辈子的底座去打磨。前十年不图多体面，只图扎实；三十岁以后，你会发现自己在社会分工里有了一个清晰的位置——别人提到某个领域，会自然想到你，这是“慢”带来的复利。
Looking back at life, especially for young people from ordinary backgrounds, I increasingly believe that between the ages of twenty and thirty, the most important thing for ordinary people is not “hurry to earn enough money,” but “choose something and slowly polish it until others can’t do without you.” This thing could be writing, design, programming, photography, craftsmanship, repair, cooking, or a specialized technique within a specific industry. It doesn’t have any inherent hierarchy or distinction; the only difference lies in whether you’re willing to treat it as a lifelong foundation to polish. In the first ten years, don’t aim for prestige, just aim for solid foundation; after thirty, you’ll find that you have a clear position in social division of labor—when people mention a certain field, they will naturally think of you, this is the compound interest brought by “slowness.”

但现实是，大多数穷人的最大陷阱，恰恰是年轻时的“消费陷阱”。刚工作几年，工资不高，支出却一项项排队：房租、社交、分期、短途旅行、各种“改善生活的小东西”，每一笔看起来都不大，但叠加起来，就足够把整个现金流掏空。没有余力储蓄，也就很难给自己留出一段真正可以“只学不算账”的时间。白天上班，晚上疲惫，周末要“放松一下”，时间被碎片化切割，注意力被各种信息和娱乐撕扯，整个人长期处在一种“又累又焦虑，但又必须继续”的状态里。
But the reality is, the biggest trap for most poor people is precisely the “consumption trap” of youth. In the few years after starting work, with low income, expenses queue up one by one: rent, socializing, installments, short trips, various “small things to improve life,” each one seems small, but when added together, they are enough to drain the entire cash flow. Without the ability to save, it’s also hard to set aside time for truly “learning without worrying about finances.” Working during the day, exhausted at night, and needing to “relax” on weekends, time is fragmented, attention is torn by various information and entertainment, and the whole person is long-term stuck in a state of “both tired and anxious, yet must continue.”

在这种状态下，很多人只能用“换工作、换行业、换赛道”来对抗焦虑。干两年觉得没前途，就跳去另一个完全不同的方向；这个做着不顺心，就再试试新的岗位；看到谁说“这个行业现在很有前景”，就忍不住想再碰碰运气。每一次跳，看起来都是在“寻找更好的机会”，可时间拉长来看，这十年像是拆成了一堆碎片：哪一块都尝了一口，却没有哪一块真正咬下去，咀嚼到味道出来。到了三十岁回头看，会冒出一句特别扎心的话——我好像干了很多事，但好像什么又都没干成。不是你没有努力，而是所有努力都太“浅尝即止”，没有给任何一门东西一个足够长的时间窗口。
In this state, many people can only fight anxiety by “changing jobs, changing industries, changing tracks.” Working for two years and feeling there’s no future, they jump into a completely different direction; this one doesn’t suit them, so they try a new position; seeing someone say “this industry is very promising now,” they can’t help but want to take a chance. Every jump seems to be “looking for better opportunities,” but when viewed over time, these ten years are like a pile of fragments: each one is tasted, but none are truly bitten into, chewed until the taste comes out. Looking back at thirty, a particularly stinging thought might arise—I seem to have done a lot of things, but it seems like I haven’t accomplished anything. It’s not that you haven’t worked hard, but that all your efforts are too “sampling and stopping,” not giving any skill enough time to develop.

从这个角度看，“慢即是快”就是穷人的顶层逻辑：你没有太多可浪费的时间和资本，就更不能把有限的十年拆成几十段随机尝试。与其在七八个行业之间来回横跳，不如认认真真选一个方向，当成自己的底层手艺，哪怕前五年看起来收入平平、职位普通，只要你一直在变得更专业、更可靠，这条路迟早会开始给你回报。技能的价值，从来不在最开始，而在后半段——刚起步时，你只是一个新手，和谁都差不多；三年之后，你懂的比新手多一点；十年之后，你对这一块的理解，已经不是培训班能教出来的东西了，那时候产生的机会、合作、收入，才是“慢”帮你积累出来的“快”。
From this perspective, “slow is fast” is the top-level logic for the poor: you don’t have much time and capital to waste, so you can’t afford to split your limited ten years into random attempts. Instead of jumping back and forth between seven or eight industries, it’s better to seriously choose one direction and treat it as your foundational skill, even if the first five years seem to bring average income and ordinary positions, as long as you keep becoming more professional and reliable, this path will eventually start to give you returns. The value of a skill has never been at the beginning, but in the later stages—when you start, you’re just a beginner, no different from anyone else; three years later, you know a bit more than a beginner; ten years later, your understanding of this field isn’t something a training class can teach, and at that time, the opportunities, collaborations, and income generated are the “fast” accumulated by “slowness.”

交易在这里，其实更像是把这个逻辑放大到了极致。那些真正能在市场上走得久的人，几乎都有一套现实世界的“底座”：要么有一门可以随时回去的技术，要么在某个行业已经站稳，有相对稳定的现金流，然后才慢慢把交易纳入自己的规划，给它几年的时间去磨合、去试错。这样一来，交易就不是背水一战，而是一门可以慢慢打磨的“另一项专业”；你在市场里的每一次学习、每一次调整，不是要靠短期盈亏养活自己，而是作为一项长期投入，和你练钢琴、学画画、做科研一样，允许它有一个很长的“看不见结果”的阶段。这样的人，更有机会在交易上体会到那种“慢即是快”的感觉。
The trade here is actually more like taking this logic to the extreme. Those who can last long in the market almost all have a “foundation” in the real world: either they have a skill they can always return to, or they have already established themselves in a certain industry with relatively stable cash flow, and then gradually incorporate trading into their plans, giving it a few years to adjust and test. In this way, trading is not a do-or-die situation, but a “second profession” that can be slowly refined; every time you learn and adjust in the market is not to rely on short-term gains to support yourself, but as a long-term investment, like practicing the piano, learning painting, or doing research, allowing it to have a very long “invisible result” stage. Such people have a greater chance to experience the feeling that “slow is fast” in trading.

但更多时候，我会反过来提醒那些刚工作没多久、又对交易感兴趣的朋友：与其一边在现实里没有立得住的技术，一边又急着在市场里寻找某种“捷径”，不如先把顺序调一调——先选一门你愿意陪它十年的手艺，把它当成人生的一块基石；等这块基石足够稳了，再来考虑要不要跟市场好好谈一谈。这不是否定交易的价值，而是承认：对穷人来说，真正的顶层逻辑，首先是“有一技在身，不至于被任何单一环境绑死”，然后才有资格去谈“在一个相对公平的市场里，多一种可能”。
But more often, I will remind my friends who have just started working and are interested in trading in the opposite way: rather than having no solid skill in the real world while also being eager to find a “shortcut” in the market, it’s better to adjust the order first — first choose a craft you are willing to spend ten years with, treating it as a cornerstone of your life; wait until this cornerstone is stable enough, then consider whether to have a good talk with the market. This is not to deny the value of trading, but to admit: for the poor, the true top-level logic is first “having a skill that won’t tie you down to any single environment,” and only then are you qualified to talk about “having more possibilities in a relatively fair market.”

所以，当我说“慢即是快，是穷人的顶层逻辑”时，我说的不是一种温柔的鸡汤，而是一件很冷酷的现实：你急着越过“打基础”的那几年，最后往往要用更长的时间去还；你不肯在二十到三十岁之间，给一门技术足够的耐心，三十岁之后就只能在各种短期补救里来回折腾。交易也好，人生也好，真正拉开差距的，不在那几次“爆发”的瞬间，而在那些别人看不见、也不太在乎的慢慢打磨里。
So, when I say “slow is fast, the top-level logic for the poor,” I am not talking about a gentle piece of comforting advice, but a very cold reality: if you rush to skip those “foundation-building” years, you will often end up spending even more time to pay it back; if you refuse to give a skill enough patience between the ages of twenty and thirty, by the time you reach thirty, you will only be back and forth in various short-term fixes. Whether it’s trading or life, the real gap is not in those few “explosive” moments, but in the slow refinement that others can’t see or don’t care much about.

你可以问问现在的自己：我有没有哪一门东西，是愿意给它十年的？我能不能接受，在年轻的时候，不那么急着收获，而是先让自己有一个在社会上真正能立住的“专业身份”？如果这个答案是“有”，那你已经在“慢即是快”的路上了；至于交易，什么时候走近它、用什么心态走近它，那时候你再决定都不晚。
You can ask yourself now: is there anything you are willing to give ten years to? Can you accept that in your youth, you won’t be so eager for rewards, but first give yourself a “professional identity” that can truly stand in society? If the answer is “yes,” then you are already on the path of “slow is fast”; as for trading, when to approach it and with what mindset, you can decide anytime.

想问一下已经上岸的各位前辈，交易的最后一关是什么？ 2026-01-05 阅读需要5分钟 别人我不知道，但我自己实现稳定盈利的最后一关就是：放下所有的不甘心，达到了知足常乐的状态。
I’d like to ask the seniors who have already “made it,” what is the final hurdle in trading? 2026-01-05 Reading time: 5 minutes I don’t know about others, but for myself, the final hurdle to achieve stable profits is: letting go of all resentment and reaching a state of contentment.

我先说一下知足常乐是一种什么样的状态吧： **1、交易能够实现稳定盈利，但不追求暴利，**并且内心非常满足这种盈利的水平和状态。
Let me tell you what a state of contentment is like: **1. Transactions can achieve stable profits, but do not pursue 暴利,** and the inner mind is very satisfied with this level and state of profit.

**2、选定了自己参与的市场，就不会因为贪心而动摇。**比如选了期货或外汇，就不会因为最近A股大涨就心痒，也不会因为币市场翻百倍的消息而蠢蠢欲动，也不会因为自己做的市场近期低迷，而感到不值得，想换。就像自己的孩子一样，永远觉得自己的孩子最好，很知足。
**2、Once you have chosen the market you want to participate in, you won’t be swayed by greed.** For example, if you choose futures or foreign exchange, you won’t be tempted by the recent surge in A-share prices, nor will you be restless by the news of cryptocurrencies doubling in value. You also won’t feel it’s not worth it or want to switch because the market you’re in has been underperforming recently. It’s like your own child—always feeling that your child is the best and being very content.

**3、对于自己选定的交易品种，不会随意更换。**不管做哪个市场，都会有波澜起伏，有的品种自己并不交易，但是短期内波动很大，但也不为所动，因为明白拿到手的利润才是自己的，别人的再好也是别人的。
**3、For the trading instruments you have chosen, you will not change them arbitrarily.** No matter which market you trade, there will be ups and downs. Some instruments you may not trade yourself, but they can be highly volatile in the short term, but you won’t be swayed by this, because you understand that the profits you hold in your hands are truly yours, and others’ success is still others’.

**4、对市场上的“先进技术”失去了探索的欲望。**技术更迭还是挺快的，过一段时间网上都会出现不一样的交易技术，或者是量化技术，但我明白，技术高不高大上不重要，能帮自己稳定赚到钱最重要，专注于自己的系统就好。
**4、Lost the desire to explore the “advanced technologies” in the market.** Technology changes quite quickly, and over time, different trading technologies or quantitative technologies will appear online. But I understand that whether the technology is high-end or not is not important; what matters most is whether it can help me stabilize and make money. Just focus on your own system.

**5、该做什么做什么，不与他人对比，不在意他人评价。**交易路上总会遇到很多人，比你胜率高，比你盈利强，但从来不与他人作比较，认认真真做好自己的每一笔交易，错了就止损，对了就止盈，也不与他人讨论行情，只相信自己的判断。
**5、Do what you should do, don’t compare with others, and don’t care about others’ opinions.** On the trading path, you will always meet many people who have a higher win rate than you and better profits, but you never compare with others. You take your time to do your every trade seriously. If you make a mistake, you cut your losses; if you are right, you take your profits. You also don’t discuss market trends with others, only trusting your own judgment.

这就是我交易知足常乐的状态，用《论语》中的一句话来形容，就是“从心所欲不逾矩”。
This is the state of contentment in trading for me. Using a phrase from the *Analects* to describe it, it is “from the heart’s desire without transgressing the rules.”

那么，如何才能放下所有的不甘心，达到这种状态呢？ 其实这个状态我也是经过了很多年才达到，在这个过程中，有过跌到谷底的时候，也有过交易巅峰的时候。
So, how can one let go of all dissatisfaction and reach this state? In fact, I also reached this state after many years. In the process, there have been times when I fell to the bottom and times when I reached the peak of trading.

在被交易磨了这么多年的情况下，你会感觉自己的欲望在逐渐降低，对交易的“瘾”也在逐年降低。当我真的开始完完全全执行自己的交易系统之后，我发现我离看清交易本质就越来越近，直到完全看清，最后无所大欲无所大求，赚到自己能赚到的钱就满足。
After being tempered by trading for so many years, you’ll find that your desires gradually decrease, and your “addiction” to trading also declines year by year. When I truly started executing my trading system completely, I found that I was getting closer and closer to seeing the essence of trading. Until I fully understood it, I had no great desires or ambitions, and was satisfied with the money I could earn.

我从15年前开始交易，当时对交易报以非常高的期望，雄心勃勃，就是觉得交易来钱快，想通过交易快速实现财务自由，当时就想象着自己可以抱着一台笔记本电脑环游世界，缺钱了，打开电脑交易几笔，赚点钱继续旅行。现在看来，那些想法真的挺可笑的。
I started trading 15 years ago, back then I had very high expectations, ambitious, thinking that trading was a quick way to make money, and wanted to achieve financial freedom through trading quickly. At that time, I imagined myself holding a laptop and traveling around the world, needing money, opening the computer to make a few trades, earning some money to continue the journey. Now looking back, those ideas were really quite laughable.

再说交易技术和指标，当我几乎亏光了所有的钱之后，才开始考虑组建自己的交易系统。当时非常执迷于各种交易技术、交易指标，只要短时间不灵了，就赶紧换一种，一直觉得是自己还没有找到交易中的圣杯，所以一直无法做到盈利，但是从来没思考过，交易中的圣杯到底是否存在？
Then there were trading techniques and indicators. After I had almost lost all my money, I started to think about building my own trading system. Back then, I was obsessed with various trading techniques and indicators. Whenever one didn’t work in the short term, I would quickly switch to another, always believing that I hadn’t found the holy grail of trading, so I couldn’t achieve profitability. But I never questioned whether the holy grail of trading actually exists?

有整整两年左右的时间，我都在这种几近偏执的状态中度过。
For about two years, I spent that time in a near-obsessive state.

后来我把所有的积蓄亏完了，卖了车卖了房，填了债，当我自己住在租着的房子里边的时候，好像时光倒退了好多年，自己在非洲那么多年吃的苦，这些年交易浑浑噩噩度过的日子，都好像不存在一样。
Later, I lost all my savings, sold my car and my house, and paid off my debts. When I was living alone in the rented apartment, it felt like time had gone back many years. The hardships I endured in Africa for so many years, and the years I spent lost in trading, all seemed to not exist at all.

后来自己度过了很长一段时间，不交易，不见人，潜心读书与运动的日子，慢慢地研究交易系统，对交易回报的期望也从翻倍翻倍再翻倍，变成了赚一点生活费就好，对交易系统的成功率，盈利率都要求降低了很多。
Later, I spent a long time by myself, not trading, not seeing anyone, immersed in reading and exercise. Gradually, I studied trading systems, and my expectations for trading returns changed from doubling and doubling again to just making enough to live on. I also lowered my requirements for the success rate and profit margin of the trading system a lot.

我现在交易的回报需求是在每年30%左右，但是当年最低的时候，我是觉得在10%左右就可以满足，后来心态变好，本金变多，才慢慢优化了自己的交易系统，提高了一些风险偏好。
My current return requirement for trading is around 30% per year. But back then, at the lowest point, I thought 10% would be enough to satisfy me. Later, as my mindset improved and my capital increased, I gradually optimized my trading system and adjusted my risk tolerance.

当自己的欲望和要求降低之后，突然发现交易根本就不难，持仓也没那么烫手，赚一些也没那么开心了，亏一点也不会那么难受了，赚赚亏亏，在一段时间之后有盈余，自己就是开心的。
After my desires and requirements lowered, I suddenly realized that trading wasn’t that difficult at all. Holding positions wasn’t as “hot” as I thought, making some profit wasn’t as exciting, and losing a bit wasn’t as painful. Winning and losing, as time went on, if there was a surplus, I was happy.

所以当我看到这个问题，问上岸之前最重要的一关是什么，我一下子就想到了自己曾经的经历。
So when I saw this question about the most important hurdle before “making it,” I immediately thought of my past experiences.

我曾经无法接受亏损的存在，现在觉得有赚有亏很正常，我要追求概率的优化，追求最终结果的盈利；我曾经想要赚大钱，赚快钱，现在觉得大盈的背后是大亏，投资是一定需要本金的，以小博大是赌博，只有通过小仓位+复利，才有可能保证绝对的执行力，以及稳定的财富增长。
I once couldn’t accept the existence of losses, but now I think it’s normal to have both gains and losses. I want to pursue the optimization of probability and the profitability of the final result. I once wanted to make big money quickly, but now I realize that big gains often come with big losses. Investing always requires a principal, and going for big wins with small stakes is gambling. Only by using small positions plus compounding can one possibly ensure absolute execution and stable wealth growth.

我想我说这么多大家应该会明白，希望大家都能实现稳定盈利，早日上岸。
I hope what I’ve said makes it clear to everyone. I hope everyone can achieve stable profits and get off the shore soon.

冰是睡着的水 2026-01-05 阅读需要5分钟 大家好，我是冰是睡着的水，我个人认为就短线而言，最挣钱的模式，短线最挣钱模式，所以就一句话。主流题材，核心个股。节点买入。在我的一个交易体系里面，就是找准一个主流题材，它是占到我交整个交易体系里面70%的一个占比。
Ice is Asleep in Water 2026-01-05 Reading time: 5 minutes Hello everyone, I’m Ice is Asleep in Water. Personally, I believe that in the short term, the most profitable model is the short-term most profitable model, so in one sentence. Mainstream themes, core stocks. Entry at key points. In my trading system, it’s about finding a mainstream theme that accounts for 70% of my entire trading system.

第一个，它的核心驱动力。核心驱动力，它一定是那个宏大的叙势，以想象空间，就是时代性的命题，既和国家战略以全球趋势，又有政策背书或者技术拐点提供长期的逻辑支撑，你像他商业航天就是这样，对吧，中美两个。大国都把这个位置提得很高，可以说是一个全球共振的题材，所以这一波是吧，大盘没有上4000点，但是不影响老师们挣麻辣，因为有一个超级主流题材在这里是吧，还是一个全球共振的主流题材。包括周末的时候，呃，就放假这段时间是吧，昨天港股是开开市的上涨最牛的就是微信列，所以后天老师们又可以收红包了，所以这就是一个主线的魅力，
First, its core driving force. The core driving force must be the grand trend, with imagined space, which is an epoch-making proposition. It is both aligned with national strategies and global trends, supported by policy backing or technological turning points that provide long-term logical backing. Take commercial spaceflight as an example, right? Both China and the US have elevated this position highly. It can be said to be a globally resonant theme, so this wave, even if the main index hasn’t reached 4,000 points, it doesn’t affect the teachers’ profits because there’s a super mainstream theme here, right? It’s still a globally resonant mainstream theme. Including during the weekend, during the holiday period, yesterday’s Hong Kong stock market opened and the most bullish was WeChat list, so the teachers can collect red envelopes again the day after tomorrow. This is the charm of the main theme.

那么第2个。它就是一个颠覆性的想象空间，就是题材，能描绘出改变世界的蓝图，即使短期很难落地，但市场愿意为远期的可能性买单。然后还有一个关键要素，就是市场的催化要素，你这个要有持续的事件催化，就比如说政政策的密集发布，技术的突破，还有标志性产品上市，然后形成这种脉冲式的热点接力。啊，商业航天也是完全符合的是吧，今天叶三号发射啊，过几天又是长征12号，后面还有。持续的这种。要要上的那个卫星，所以这种持续的催化的题材，就给了量化这种充分的语料，所以能够支撑他不断的上涨。
So the second one. It’s a disruptive imaginative space, which is the theme, capable of depicting a blueprint for changing the world, even if it’s difficult to materialize in the short term, but the market is willing to pay for the long-term possibilities. Then there’s another key element, which is the catalytic factor of the market. You need continuous event catalysis, such as the dense release of policies, technological breakthroughs, and the launch of landmark products, then forming a pulse-like relay of hotspots. Ah, commercial spaceflight also completely fits, right? Today is the launch of Ye-3, in a few days it’s the Long March 12, and there are more to come. The continuous catalytic themes give quantitative enough material, so it can support its continuous rise.

然后还有一个就是龙头的标杆效应，就是。短期内出现了涨幅巨大的个股。包括有些巨头以身入局是吧，激活了板块的挣钱效应，吸引了那个市场的跟风。
Then there’s also the benchmark effect of the leader. That is, individual stocks with huge short-term gains appear. Including some giants getting involved, activating the profit effect of the sector, and attracting market followers.

第三个关键点就是情绪。资金与情绪基础，就你这个题材要炒作起来容量要足够大，就一个板块能够涵盖数十甚至上百家公司，容量能够承载机构跟游资还有散户多方资金形成产业链上的联动，这种题材就是符合我们说的一个超级主流题材，你包括像那个你看商业航天这波，连中国卫星这种大盘子都能拉4个涨停板，对吧，什么资金容不下，所以有的时候我们挣钱也就是这一下机会，你逮到一个主流题材在上面猛干是吧，还怕钱多吗？中国卫星随便买。4个板对吧，所以。这个也是很关键的，如果你一个小题材，我们大概一看，连个股都找不了几只，更别说还有些有逻辑支撑的东西，一看就几只个股是吧，这个东西炒不起来的是吧，就短期。弄2天后面就不了了之了。
The third key point is sentiment. The fund and sentiment base. Your theme needs to have enough capacity to 炒作 (speculate) if it’s to rise. That is, a sector can cover dozens or even hundreds of companies, with enough capacity to carry institutional, retail, and speculative funds to form a linkage in the industry chain. Such themes fit what we call a super mainstream theme. You include commercial spaceflight, for example, even a large-cap like China Satellite can pull 4 consecutive limit-ups, right? What market can’t accommodate? So sometimes our profits come from this one opportunity. You grab a mainstream theme and work hard on it, are you afraid of having too much money? China Satellite can be bought at will, 4 limit-ups, right? So. This is also very key. If you have a small theme, we can roughly see that we can’t find even a few individual stocks, let alone some logical support, it’s obvious with just a few individual stocks, right? This won’t 炒作 (speculate) well. It’s short-term, lasts for two days, then it’s forgotten.

还有一个就是筹码结构比较新，就题材相对而言要新颖一点，就前期没有套牢盘，或者长时间经历了那个出清之后，仓位就比较低，然后便于资金快速建仓是吧，你像。这两年AI跟机器人对吧，它是也是逻辑很硬的，但是有一些这种题材，它运作的这个高位很难就拉得起来，所以商业航天他就完全符合这个。
Another one is the chip structure is relatively new. The theme needs to be relatively novel, with no trapped positions in advance, or having gone through a long period of clearing, resulting in low positions, making it easy for funds to build positions quickly, right? Like. AI and robotics in the past two years, they are also very logical, but some themes, their operation at a high position is difficult to pull up, so commercial spaceflight completely fits this.

那么第4个关键点就是参与门槛与传播性，就是这一个，你的逻辑要简单易懂，有核心的逻辑就用一两句话就能说得清，便于媒体的传播跟散户的理解，那有些时候我们之前炒AI的时候啊，小作文。就是你每天要学习很多专业性的东西，真的你说的别人都听不懂，你这个东西那就很难买嘛，是吧，买买的过去都没底，学的越多亏得越多是吧，所以这个东西也很关键，
So the fourth key point is participation threshold and communicability, just this one, your logic needs to be simple and easy to understand, if there is a core logic, use one or two sentences to make it clear,便于媒体的传播跟散户的理解, that’s right, when we were hyping AI before, those small essays. You had to learn a lot of professional things every day, really, what you said others didn’t understand, then it’s hard to sell, right, even if it sells, there’s no confidence, the more you learn, the more you lose, right, so this is also very important,

那么第5点就是风险与边界。这一块就是模糊的正伪空间，这一块的话，你短期就是难以被业绩验证，或者是正伪，要给题材那种故事有一个时间的窗口，所以这块也比较重要，你不能就是说短期不能证明他不行，所以这有想象空间。
The fifth point is risk and boundaries. This part is the blurry space between genuine and fake, in this part, you are short-term difficult to be verified by performance or genuine or fake, you need to give a time window for the theme’s story, so this part is also important, you can’t just say it can’t be proven short-term, so there is room for imagination.

那么第六个就是监管与基本面的锚定，要要警惕那种纯概念的炒作就脱离他会脱离监管的一个容忍度，或者业绩暴雷，导致逻辑的崩塌，然后需要后期的话，就需要业绩兑现才能转化为长流，是吧，我们之前炒的那种玄学的不用说，到了后面肯定是没了的，这个可以，那个你如果还是按照以前的那个来炒玄学，那这个肯定是没没没了的，你这个。是吧，如果还在这里面这个东西政策也不支持的是吧，监管也不支持的，这个就有点离离离谱了。
The sixth point is regulation and fundamental anchor, you need to be alert to those pure concept hype that deviates from the regulatory tolerance or performance shock, leading to the collapse of logic, then later, performance realization is needed to convert it into long-term flow, right, the kind of metaphysics we hyped before, don’t even mention it, it definitely ended up being gone later, this can, that if you still follow the old way to hype metaphysics, then this is definitely endless, this. right, if you are still in this, the policy doesn’t support it, the regulation doesn’t support it, this is a bit 离离离谱了.

东大正在让贸易变得不可能！ 2026-01-06 阅读需要6分钟 最近英国的金融时报 （financial Times）发了一篇很有意思的文章，标题耸人听闻：”China ismakingtrade impossible”，翻译过就是：”中国正在让贸易变得不可能”。
Dongda is making trade impossible! 2026-01-06 Reading takes 6 minutes Recently, the Financial Times of the UK published an interesting article with a sensational title: “China is making trade impossible”, translated it means: “China is making trade impossible”.

文章提出一个发人深省的问题：中国到底要跟世界买什么？答案是没有，中国几乎可以造出一切，而中国造不出来的，世界也不愿意卖给中国。因为卖给中国后，不用多久，中国就能以更高的效率、更好的质量和更低的成本将其国产化。
The article poses a thought-provoking question: What exactly does China need to buy from the world? The answer is nothing, as China can almost produce everything, and what China cannot produce, the world is not willing to sell to China. This is because if sold to China, the country would soon be able to produce it domestically with higher efficiency, better quality, and lower costs.

几乎同时，《经济学人》杂志也发了一篇文章，标题是”中国下一个统治的领域是什么”。是AI？还是芯片？这些技术似乎迟早也会被中国突破。为何外媒会突然如此焦虑？因为他们觉得中国制造太强了，强到让其他国家没法参与竞争。但今天不想聊中国制造业有多厉害，而是想带
Almost simultaneously, The Economist magazine also published an article titled “What is China’s next dominant field?”. Is it AI? Or chips? These technologies seem to be bound to be broken through by China sooner or later. Why are foreign media suddenly so anxious? Because they feel that Chinese manufacturing is too strong, strong enough to make it impossible for other countries to compete. But today, I don’t want to talk about how impressive Chinese manufacturing is; instead, I want to discuss…

大家透过这一现象，去剖析一个更深层、甚至有点惊心动魄的经济逻辑。若看不懂这个逻辑，就看不懂为何中国要推进人民币国际化，更看不懂为何2025年海南必须封关。
Through this phenomenon, let’s analyze a deeper, even somewhat thrilling economic logic. If you don’t understand this logic, you won’t understand why China is promoting the internationalization of the RMB, nor will you understand why Hainan must be closed off in 2025.

首先看当前全球贸易状态，中国对世界保持着绝对的贸易顺差，卖得多、买得少，全世界的钱都在流向中国。这听起来是好事，家里有钱了。但问题是这笔钱是美元。在现有国际体系下，只要还用美元结算，中国就会陷入一个极其尴尬的死循环。中国辛辛苦苦生产衣服、鞋子、家电，卖给美国，换回一堆美元。这些美元留在手里是废纸，要么花出去，要么投资出去保值增值。可是要怎么花？回到之前的问题，没有中国需要买的东西，中国想买的人家又不卖，去收购美国的高科技公司人家也不同意。
First, let’s look at the current global trade situation. China maintains an absolute trade surplus with the world, exporting more than it imports, with money flowing from all over the world to China. This sounds like a good thing, as the country has more money. But the problem is that this money is in U.S. dollars. Under the existing international system, as long as transactions are settled in U.S. dollars, China will fall into an extremely awkward dead cycle. China works hard to produce clothes, shoes, and home appliances, selling them to the U.S. in exchange for a pile of U.S. dollars. These dollars are useless if held, so they must be spent or invested to preserve and increase value. But how can they be spent? Returning to the earlier question, since there are no goods that China needs to buy, and the countries it wants to buy from don’t sell, even attempts to acquire U.S. high-tech companies are met with refusal.

最后这些美元兜兜转转只能流回美国，买美债、买美股、买黄金。这就逻辑闭环了，若把中美看作两家公司，就相当于中国天天加班给美国干活，美国给中国打了个白条（美元），然后中国又把这个白条借给美国买美债，让美国拿着中国的钱过上好日子，甚至反过来遏制中国。关键是中国借给美国的钱，美国永远都不用还，因为中国收回来也花不出去，而且还能赚钱，又会再借给美国。
The last of these US dollars can only circulate back to the United States, buying US debt, US stocks, or gold. This creates a logical 闭环. If China and the US are seen as two companies, it’s like China working overtime every day for the US, while the US gives China a IOU (dollars). Then China lends this IOU back to the US to buy US debt, allowing the US to live well with China’s money, and even turn around to contain China. The key is that the money China lends to the US, the US will never have to repay, because even if China recovers it, it can’t spend it, and it can still make money and lend it back to the US.

最后的极端结果就是整个世界只剩下中国和美国在”游戏”，中国手里握着所有美元，其他国家都是美元的搬运工和二传手。这意味着中国的主权财富命脉攥在美国人手里。一旦发生极端地缘冲突，参考俄罗斯的下场，资产冻结、被剔除出
The final extreme outcome is that only China and the US are left playing in the “game,” with China holding all the US dollars and other countries acting as intermediaries and middlemen for the dollars. This means the 命脉 of China’s sovereign wealth is in the hands of the Americans. Once extreme geopolitical conflicts occur, referring to Russia’s fate, asset freezes and being kicked out of

Swift，中国几十年攒下的血汗钱很有可能瞬间归零。
Swift, China’s decades of hard-earned savings could very likely be wiped out instantly.

那怎么打破这个局答案只有一个：换一种货币来结算。既然中国的商品其他国家非买不可，那以后就不收美元了，请支付人民币。只要结算货币变成人民币，这个令人恶心的美元闭环就会被切断。中国收到的是自己的货币，或者换回来实实在在的资源，而不是一张随时可能作废的美元欠条。
So how to break this situation? There is only one answer: switch to another currency for settlement. Since other countries have no choice but to buy China’s goods, from now on, they won’t accept dollars but will pay in Chinese yuan. As long as the settlement currency becomes the Chinese yuan, this disgusting dollar 闭环 will be cut off. China receives its own currency, or exchanges it for real resources, rather than a dollar IOU that could be invalidated at any time.

但这里有一个巨大的痛点，也是很多网友想不通的地方：老外凭什么愿意拿人民币？想让沙特、巴西、俄罗斯手里赚一堆人民币，得给人家一个理由。美元之所以好用，是因为拿着美元可以在全世界买东西，能去华尔街投资。那人家拿着人民币，除了买中国货还能干嘛？如果这笔钱在他们手里花不出去，也投不出去，他们就不敢收人民币。
But there is a huge pain point here, which is also something many netizens can’t figure out: Why would foreigners be willing to take the Chinese yuan? To make Saudi Arabia, Brazil, and Russia earn a lot of Chinese yuan, you need to give them a reason. The US dollar is so useful because you can use it to buy things all over the world and invest in Wall Street. So what can they do with the Chinese yuan besides buying Chinese goods? If this money can’t be spent or invested in their hands, they won’t dare to accept the Chinese yuan.

所以人民币国际化的关键不是让人民币”走出去”，而是建立一个资能这资金回流机制。
So the key to the internationalization of the Chinese yuan is not to let the yuan “go out,” but to establish a mechanism for capital to flow back.

说到这，海南的角色终于登场了。很多人以为海南封关就是以后去海南买东西，免税包包更便宜了，这格局就小了。海南2025年封关运作，本质上是国家为人民币国际化打造的一个金融场景。
When it comes to this, the role of Hainan has finally taken the stage. Many people think that the customs closure of Hainan is just about being able to buy things in Hainan in the future, and that tax-free bags will be cheaper, but that’s a narrow perspective. The customs closure of Hainan in 2025 is essentially a financial scenario created by the country to promote the internationalization of the RMB.

什么是封关？简单说就是”一线放开，二线管住”。
What is customs clearance? Simply put, it means “opening the first line and controlling the second line.”

海南和国际之间，资金、人员、货物是极度自由的，但海南和内地之间有了严格的关卡，这是在中国国土上画出的一块”境内关外”的特殊区域。对于手握人民币的老外来说，海南是他们最好的去处。想买好货，这里是全世界最大
Hainan and internationally, funds, personnel, and goods are extremely free, but there are strict checkpoints between Hainan and the mainland. This is a special area called “within the country but outside the customs” drawn on Chinese territory. For foreigners holding RMB, Hainan is their best destination. Want to buy good goods, this is the largest in the world.

的免税市场和离岸贸易中心；想钱生钱，只要持有人民币，就可以在海南自由投资，税率极低，资金进出不像内地那样受严格管制，同时还受中国法律保护，安全感十足。
Tax-free market and offshore trade center; if you want to make money from money, as long as you hold RMB, you can invest freely in Hainan with extremely low tax rates. Capital inflow and outflow are not strictly controlled like in the mainland, and it is also protected by Chinese law, giving you a strong sense of security.

有了海南，人民币在海外形成了一个完美的闭环。外国人卖资源赚人民币，拿人民币去海南买免税品、买理财、投企业，资金回流到中国的人民币体系中来。这样一来，中国就不需要看美联储的脸色过日子，也不用担心手里的美债最后变成废纸了。
With Hainan, the RMB has formed a perfect closed loop overseas. Foreigners sell resources to earn RMB, then use the RMB to buy duty-free goods, invest in financial products, or invest in enterprises in Hainan, with the capital flowing back into China’s RMB system. In this way, China no longer needs to live according to the whims of the Federal Reserve, nor does it need to worry that the U.S. Treasury bonds in its hands will end up as worthless paper.

回过头来看，英国金融时报说中国让贸易变得不可能，其实是因为他们习惯了美国印钱买全世界的游戏规则，而这个规则正在被中国打破。从强大的制造业顺差，到拒绝美元收割，再到人民币”走出去”，最后通过海南封关把资金留下来，这是一个严丝合缝的逻辑闭环。
Looking back, the Financial Times said that China has made trade impossible. In reality, this is because they are accustomed to the rule of the U.S. printing money to buy the world, and this rule is now being broken by China. From a strong manufacturing trade surplus, to rejecting the U.S. dollar’s predatory practices, to the “going global” of the RMB, and finally keeping the capital locked in through Hainan’s closed border, it is airtight logic loop.

海南封关不仅关乎旅游，更关乎每一个人的钱袋子安全，关乎在这个动荡的世界里，中国能不能把真正的经济命脉牢牢握在自己手里。
Hainan’s closed border is not just about tourism; it’s about the financial security of every person, about whether China can firmly hold the true economic lifeline in its hands in this turbulent world.

亏损之后，高手做的第一件事是什么 2026-01-04 阅读需要3分钟 亏损之后，高手做的第一件事是什么
After a loss, what is the first thing a master does? 2026-01-04 Reading takes 3 minutes What is the first thing a master does after a loss?

亏损之后，多数人做的一件事，几乎是本能的。打开K线，反复回看那一笔，试着找出哪里出了问题，脑子里不停假设，如果当时换一种做法，结果会不会不一样。你会觉得，只要马上修正，一切就还能回到正轨。
After a loss, almost everyone does one thing instinctively. They open the candlestick charts, repeatedly review that specific trade, trying to figure out where they went wrong, constantly hypothesizing if a different approach at the time might have led to a different outcome. You’d think that as long as they correct immediately, everything can still get back on track.

但真高手，往往不会这么做。
But true experts often don’t do this.

他们在亏损之后，做的第一件事，反而是停下来。不是复盘，不是加指标，也不是立刻想清楚下一步该怎么办，而是暂时退出，哪怕只是短暂地不参与。
After a loss, the first thing they do instead is to stop. Not to review, not to add indicators, and not to immediately figure out what to do next, but to temporarily withdraw, even if it’s just a brief period of non-participation.

这件事听起来很简单，但其实非常反人性。因为亏损会制造一种很强烈的冲动，让你觉得自己必须立刻做点什么。如果你什么都不做，就像是在默认失败一样。
This sounds simple, but it’s actually very counterhuman. Because a loss creates a very strong impulse, making you feel like you must do something immediately. If you do nothing, it feels like you’re accepting failure.

可问题在于，亏损之后最危险的，从来不是钱少了，而是你开始用受伤的心智去修复系统。你以为自己在冷静分析，其实情绪还在，只是换了一种更隐蔽的方式存在。
The problem lies in the fact that what’s most dangerous after a loss is never the lack of money, but rather when you start to repair the system with a wounded mindset. You think you’re calmly analyzing, but your emotions are still there, just existing in a more concealed way.

高手很清楚这一点。他们知道，亏损本身未必是问题，真正危险的是连续状态。上一笔交易留下的情绪，如果不被切断，很容易渗透进下一次判断里，让你在不知不觉中改变节奏。
Experts are very clear about this. They know that losses themselves may not be the problem; what’s truly dangerous is the consecutive state. The emotions left from the previous trade, if not cut off, can easily seep into the next judgment, causing you to change your rhythm without realizing it.

所以他们会刻意做一件很克制的事，把上一笔交易的影响，强行截断。不急着复盘，不急着下结论，甚至不急着证明自己没有问题。他们只是先让自己停下来。
So they deliberately do something very restrained: they forcefully cut off the impact of the previous trade. They don’t rush to review, don’t rush to draw conclusions, and even don’t rush to prove they didn’t make a mistake. They just let themselves stop first.

很多人不理解，为什么不立刻复盘。其实原因很简单，在情绪还没退潮的时候，所谓的复盘，大多数时候只是自我辩护。你会下意识为当时的决定找理由，或者拼命寻找这次只是意外的证据，而不是真的在看清问题。
Many people don’t understand why they don’t review immediately. The reason is actually very simple: when emotions haven’t receded, what’s called a review is mostly just self-defense. You instinctively make excuses for your decisions at the time, or desperately search for evidence that this was just a fluke, rather than truly seeing the problem.

真正有效的复盘，只有在一个前提下才成立，那就是你已经不再被这次亏损牵着走。你能平静地看它，就像看一段已经结束的录像，而不是正在发生的事。
A truly effective review only holds under one premise: that you are no longer being led astray by this loss. You can look at it calmly, like watching a video that has already ended, rather than something that is happening right now.

表面上看，高手在那段时间里像是什么都没做。但实际上，他们在完成几件极难的事。他们让情绪自然耗散，而不是压住它；他们重新校准对风险的感受，而不是在恐惧或愤怒中做决定。他们也在等待一个更清晰的答案，这次亏损，到底是偶然，还是结构本身的问题。
On the surface, experts seem to have done nothing during that time. In reality, however, they were accomplishing several extremely difficult tasks. They allowed their emotions to naturally dissipate rather than suppressing them; they recalibrated their perception of risk rather than making decisions driven by fear or anger. They were also waiting for a clearer answer: was this loss merely accidental, or a problem with the structure itself.

利弗莫尔晚年反复提到“等待”，很多人以为他是在等行情，其实他更多是在等自己。他很清楚，一个尚未从亏损中走出来的人，是不具备参与下一次机会的资格的。市场不会催你，而着急的，往往只有你自己。
Leverage Moore often mentioned “waiting” in his later years. Many thought he was waiting for market trends, but he was more often waiting for himself. He was very clear that someone who has not yet moved past a loss is not qualified to participate in the next opportunity. The market will not rush you, but often it is only you who are in a hurry.

如果你最近也刚经历过一笔不太舒服的亏损，
If you have recently just experienced an uncomfortable loss,

我想留给你几句话，不是技巧，
I want to leave you a few words, not techniques,

只是一些很现实的心法：
but some very realistic mindsets:

1）亏损之后，先切断连续性，不做“修复型交易”。

1. After a loss, first cut off continuity, don’t make “repair-type trades”.

2）复盘是需要延迟的，情绪没退干净，结论大多是假的。
2) Reviewing is something that needs to be delayed, most conclusions are false when emotions haven’t subsided completely.

3）系统不是在情绪中优化的，任何激动下的调整都会留下后遗症。
3）The system is not optimized in the heat of emotion; any adjustments made under excitement will leave aftereffects.

4）你不需要马上赢回来，市场不会因为你暂停而消失。
4）You don’t need to win back immediately; the market won’t disappear just because you pause.

我最后想问你一句：
The last thing I want to ask you is:

你最近一次亏损之后，
The last time you lost,

做的第一件事是什么？
What is the first thing to do?

是立刻回到盘面？
To immediately return to the board?

想证明自己还能行？
To prove to yourself that you can still do it?

还是终于有一次，
Or finally, there’s once

选择先让自己停下来？
Choose to stop yourself first?

有时候，真正拉开差距的，
Sometimes, what really makes the difference,

不是你多会交易，
isn’t how often you trade,

而是你能不能在受伤的时候，不上场。
but whether you can step out when you’re hurt.

东西明明是“大家的”，最后为什么成了“他的”？ 2026-01-01 阅读需要8分钟 不久前，南京博物院部分公共藏品被违规处置后流入市场变现的新闻引发热议，这桩看似个案的事件，却撕开了一个被反复回避的现实裂口：一件东西名义上归“大家”所有，可当实际支配权攥在少数人手里时，“公有”就可能沦为特权阶层的私产。
Why was something that was clearly “everyone’s” ultimately become “his”? 2026-01-01 Reading takes 8 minutes Recently, the news of some public collections from the Nanjing Museum being improperly disposed of and then sold in the market sparked widespread discussion. This seemingly isolated incident, however, exposed a reality gap that has been repeatedly avoided: when something is nominally owned by “everyone,” but actual control falls into the hands of a few, “public” can easily become the private property of the privileged class.

有评论尖锐地指出：“财产一旦被宣布为‘共有’，那谁拥有管理权，财产实际上就归谁所有——只是名义上属于大家。”这句话之所以刺耳，正因它戳中了革命之后最容易被忽视的核心问题：决定归属的，从来不只是所有权写在谁名下，而是谁掌握着不受监督的支配权。
A sharp comment pointed out: “Once property is declared ‘common,’ whoever holds the management rights, the property is practically owned by them—just nominally by everyone.” This statement is jarring precisely because it strikes at the core issue most easily overlooked after a revolution: what determines ownership is never just whose name is on the title, but who wields unchecked dominion.

把视线从博物馆移开，这种困境并不陌生。许多宏大叙事里，剥削被宣布消灭，财产被宣布“公有”，人民被宣布“当家作主”；可具体生活中，普通人依然能清晰感受到，自己与权力、资源和决策之间，隔着一道稳定而清晰的距离。当一切都需要仰视“管理者”时，我们不得不正视那个严肃的问题：如果“共同所有”最终只意味着“由少数人管理”，那革命之后，问题究竟解决了没有？
Shifting the focus away from the museum, this dilemma is not unfamiliar. In many grand narratives, exploitation is declared abolished, property is declared “public,” and the people are declared “in charge”; yet in daily life, ordinary people can still clearly feel the stable and clear distance between themselves and power, resources, and decision-making. When everything must be looked up to the “managers,” we are forced to confront the serious question: if “joint ownership” ultimately means “managed by a few,” then did the problems really get solved after the revolution?

这不是情绪性的质疑，而是一个植根于马克思主义立场的理论叩问。它指向的，正是官僚主义在革命之后可能形成的问题——当管理权彻底脱离群众的监督与约束，“公有”就可能在形式上成立，却在现实中被重新私有化。而要厘清这个问题，我们绕不开吉拉斯的《新阶级》。
This is not an emotional question, but a theoretical inquiry rooted in Marxist 立场. It points to the problems that bureaucracy might create after a revolution—if management power completely 脱离 s the supervision and constraints of the masses, “public” might exist in form but be re-privatized in reality. To clarify this issue, we cannot avoid Milovan Djilas’s “The New Class.”

很多人读完《新阶级》，都会生出复杂的感受：他说的并不全是错的，甚至有些地方格外刺痛现实，但他的结论却让人难以接受。
Many people, after reading *The New Class*, feel a complex mix of emotions: what he says is not entirely wrong, and in some places, it even painfully exposes reality, but his conclusions are hard to accept.

革命胜利了，旧的统治阶级被推翻了，可为什么普通人的处境并没有发生根本变化？剥削在名义上被消灭了，但为什么人们依然感到与权力、资源和决策如此遥远？如果一切仍然需要仰视“管理者”，那这种制度究竟是在走向解放，还是在走向新的异化？
The revolution has won, the old ruling class has been overthrown, but why hasn’t the situation of ordinary people fundamentally changed? Exploitation has been nominally abolished, but why do people still feel distant from power, resources, and decision-making? If everything still requires looking up to “managers,” is this system moving toward liberation, or toward new alienation?

《新阶级》的意义，不在于它否定了什么，而在于它逼迫人们正视那个长期被回避的命题：官僚主义是否会在革命之后，演变为一种新的特权结构。吉拉斯作为亲身参与革命与国家建设的共产党人，他的批判并非来自外部的攻击，而是一种内部的失望。他笔下的“新阶级”，不占有生产资料的私人产权，却通过掌控国家权力与资源分配权，逐渐与普通劳动者拉开距离；他们脱离直接生产，却以“人民代表”的名义主导社会运行。
The significance of *The New Class* lies not in what it denies, but in forcing people to confront a long-avoided question: whether bureaucracy will evolve into a new privileged structure after the revolution. As a Communist Party member who personally participated in the revolution and national construction, his critique stems not from an external attack but from an internal disillusionment. The “new class” he describes does not own private property in the means of production, yet gradually distances itself from ordinary workers by controlling state power and resource allocation. They are detached from direct production, yet dominate social operations in the name of “representatives of the people.”

这种描述之所以能引发广泛共鸣，正因许多普通人在现实中感受到了类似的差距，却苦于无法用理论语言精准表达。从这个角度看，《新阶级》的批判具有深刻的现实警示意义。
This description resonates so widely because many ordinary people have experienced similar gaps in reality but struggle to articulate them precisely in theoretical language. From this perspective, the critique in *The New Class* carries profound practical implications.

但问题的发现，并不等于问题的答案。吉拉斯在揭示问题之后停下了，而马克思主义不能停下。
But the discovery of the problem does not equal the answer to the problem. After revealing the issue, Geras stopped, while Marxism could not stop.

吉拉斯的致命局限，恰恰藏在他的结论里。在敏锐捕捉到官僚主义与特权群体的滋生后，他没有追问这些问题产生的历史条件，更没有探索克服问题的现实路径，反而直接抛出了悲观论断：共产主义在实践中必然走向新的统治阶层，因此这一理想本身就是空想。
Geras’s fatal limitation was precisely hidden in his conclusion. After keenly capturing the growth of bureaucracy and privileged groups, he did not ask about the historical conditions that gave rise to these problems, nor did he explore practical paths to overcome them, instead directly making a pessimistic judgment: communism, in practice, will inevitably lead to a new ruling class, and therefore this ideal itself is utopian.

这一判断，本质上是对辩证法的背离。它将特定历史阶段的具体矛盾，当成了不可逆转的宿命；把可以通过群众斗争、制度革新解决的问题，上升为对理想本身的否定。也正因如此，这部作品后来被西方资本主义世界奉为圭臬，用来宣扬“任何变革终将失败”“所有理想都会褪色”，以此消解人们追求社会进步的信念——这早已超出理论反思的范畴，沦为了意识形态斗争的工具。
This judgment is essentially a deviation from dialectics. It treats the specific contradictions of a particular historical stage as an irreversible fate; it elevates problems that can be solved through mass struggles and institutional reforms into a negation of the ideal itself. It is precisely for this reason that this work was later revered by the Western capitalist world as a cornerstone, used to promote the idea that “any change will ultimately fail” and “all ideals will fade,” thereby undermining people’s belief in pursuing social progress—this has long gone beyond the realm of theoretical reflection and has sunk into the tool of ideological struggle.

然而，吉拉斯并不是唯一看到官僚主义风险的人。在东方的革命实践中，教员早已清醒地认识到：官僚主义不是个别人的道德堕落，而是权力结构脱离群众后的必然产物。
However, Geras was not the only one to see the risk of bureaucracy. In Eastern revolutionary practice, the leader had long been clearly aware that bureaucracy was not the moral decline of individuals, but an inevitable product of power structures becoming detached from the masses.

通过整风、反腐，的确可以在一定程度上遏制腐化现象，但如果权力始终高悬于人民之上，如果群众缺乏实质性的监督与参与权，再清廉的官员，也会因地位与资源的差异，形成新的不平等。这正是吉拉斯与真正的马克思主义者的根本分野：吉拉斯把官僚问题当作“无法逆转的现实”，最终将批判的矛头对准了共产主义理想；而马克思主义者则把问题的出现，视为新的斗争任务的开端。
Through rectification and anti-corruption campaigns, corruption can indeed be curbed to some extent. However, if power remains above the people and the masses lack substantive supervision and participation rights, even the most incorruptible officials will form new inequalities due to differences in status and resources. This is precisely the fundamental difference between Geras and true Marxists: Geras treats the bureaucratic problem as an “irreversible reality,” ultimately directing his critique against the communist ideal, while Marxists view the emergence of the problem as the beginning of a new struggle.

在马克思主义的视野里，官僚主义的滋生，是革命胜利后阶级斗争在新历史条件下的延续。旧剥削阶级被打倒，不代表阶级斗争自动消亡，围绕权力、资源、话语权的争夺，始终会以新的形式展开。无视这一点，革命就只会停留在形式上，而无法实现实质上的深入推进。
From a Marxist perspective, the rise of bureaucracy is the continuation of class struggle under new historical conditions after the victory of the revolution. The overthrow of the old exploiting class does not mean that class struggle automatically disappears. The struggle for power, resources, and discourse will always continue in new forms. Ignoring this point means the revolution will only remain superficial and fail to achieve substantive advancement.

更重要的是，马克思主义者清醒地意识到，“以官制官”的内部约束，解决不了“新阶级”的根结。反腐、整风、纪律检查，最多只能限制“过度腐化”，却无法消除官僚作为脱离群众的特殊层级的存在。即便是最自律、最清廉的官员，只要其社会地位、生活条件、资源占有长期高于普通劳动者，这种差异本身，就会成为新阶层分化的基础。
More importantly, Marxists are keenly aware that internal constraints through the “bureaucracy governing the bureaucracy” cannot solve the root of the “new class.” Anti-corruption, rectification, and disciplinary inspections can at most limit “excessive corruption” but cannot eliminate the bureaucracy as a special stratum detached from the masses. Even the most disciplined and incorruptible officials, as long as their social status, living conditions, and resource holdings are permanently higher than those of ordinary workers, this very disparity will become the basis for the differentiation of the new strata.

吉拉斯正是停留在这一层经验判断上，才得出“新阶级不可避免”的结论。但他恰恰忽略了问题的核心：官僚之所以能稳固为阶层，根本原因在于群众被排除在权力运行的全过程之外。
It is precisely because Geras stops at this level of empirical judgment that he concludes the “new class is inevitable.” However, he 恰恰 overlooks the core of the issue: bureaucracy can solidify as a stratum because the masses are excluded from the entire process of power operation.

而东方的革命实践，给出了比《新阶级》更彻底的回答。当一群马克思主义者清晰地意识到，官僚主义是权力脱离群众后的结构性风险，而非个人道德问题时，解决方案的核心就不再是“加强对官僚的管理”，而是重塑权力与群众的关系——不是维护官僚体系的“纯洁性”，而是打破官僚的神圣光环；不是让群众继续被动接受“代表”，而是让群众直接参与到对权力的监督、批判与改造之中。
And the revolutionary practice in the East provided a more radical answer than *The New Class*. When a group of Marxists clearly recognized that bureaucracy is a structural risk of power detaching from the masses, rather than a personal moral issue, the core of the solution was no longer “strengthening the management of bureaucracy,” but reshaping the relationship between power and the masses—not preserving the “purity” of the bureaucratic system, but breaking the sacred halo of bureaucracy; not letting the masses continue to passively accept “representatives,” but enabling the masses to directly participate in the supervision, criticism, and transformation of power.

这一步，是止步于失望的吉拉斯无法理解，也不敢迈出的。
This step, which the disillusioned Gilas could neither understand nor dare to take, was a leap beyond disappointment.

从个人经历来看，吉拉斯的悲观不难理解。一个真诚的马克思主义者，亲眼目睹理想与现实的巨大落差，生出强烈的失望情绪，本是人之常情。但马克思主义从来不是以个人情绪作为历史判断依据的理论。当吉拉斯高呼“理想破产”的时候，他其实放弃了一个更艰难、也更具革命性的立场——承认问题的存在，却依然坚定地站在人民一边，继续推动斗争。
From a personal perspective, Gilas’s pessimism is not hard to understand. A sincere Marxist, witnessing the vast gap between ideals and reality, feeling intense disappointment, is only natural. But Marxism has never been a theory that uses personal emotions as a basis for historical judgment. When Gilas shouted “ideals have collapsed,” he actually abandoned a more difficult and more revolutionary stance—acknowledging the existence of the problem while still firmly standing with the people and continuing to advance the struggle.

历史的发展从来不是一条笔直的坦途。官僚主义的出现，不代表革命的失败；“新阶级”的风险，也不是共产主义的终点。
The development of history has never been a straight and smooth path. The emergence of bureaucracy does not signify the failure of the revolution; the risk of the “new class” is also not the end of communism.

真正决定历史走向的，从来不是问题是否存在，而是问题出现时，社会选择站在哪一边——是继续把权力集中在少数人手中，还是将权力重新交还给人民。马克思主义之所以具有强大的生命力，正是因为它拒绝将任何制度神圣化。它不承诺永远正确，却始终坚守一条底线：人民，永远不能被排除在历史进程之外。
What truly determines the course of history is never whether a problem exists, but rather which side of society chooses to stand when the problem arises—whether to continue concentrating power in the hands of a few or to return power back to the people. The reason Marxism possesses such powerful vitality is precisely because it refuses to sanctify any system. It does not promise to be always right, but it always upholds a bottom line: the people can never be excluded from the historical process.

回到南京博物院的那场风波，它所折射的，从来都不只是文物管理的漏洞，更是“公有”与“管理”的边界问题。当公共财产的支配权，彻底脱离了人民的监督，“大家的东西”沦为“他的东西”，就成了大概率事件。
Looking back at the controversy at the Nanjing Museum, what it reflects is never just the loopholes in artifact management, but the boundary issue between “public” and “management.” When the 支配权 (dominance right) of public property is completely detached from the supervision of the people, “everyone’s property” becomes “his property,” and this becomes a highly likely event.

而破解这一困局的答案，从来都不在官僚体系的内部，而在每一个普通人的手中。唯有让群众真正成为权力的监督者、制度的参与者，才能让“公有”回归其本质，才能让革命之后的问题，真正得到解决。
The answer to breaking this predicament has never been within the bureaucratic system, but in the hands of every ordinary person. Only by allowing the masses to truly become supervisors of power and participants in the system can “public” return to its essence, and can the problems that arose after the revolution be truly resolved.

官僚不是命运，人民才是答案。
Bureaucrats are not fate; the people are the answer.

生活中随意引入变量，就会倒大霉 2026-01-06 阅读需要21分钟 一个朋友，前段时间给我发信息，洋洋洒洒几千字，诉说他的崩溃。
Introducing variables arbitrarily in life will bring great misfortune 2026-01-06 Reading time: 21 minutes A friend, recently, sent me a message, rambling for thousands of words, describing his breakdown.

起因，说出来你可能不信，是一个智能马桶盖。
The reason, you might not believe it, is a smart toilet seat.

事情是这样的。
Here’s what happened.

他家那个房子住了快十年，很多东西都旧了。他老婆前阵子去邻居家串门，体验了一下邻居家的智能马桶盖，回来就念念不忘，说冬天上厕所有个加热的圈，太幸福了。
His house had been lived in for nearly a decade, with many things becoming old. His wife had recently visited a neighbor’s house and experienced their smart toilet seat. Upon coming back, she couldn’t stop talking about it, saying that having a heated circle when using the toilet in winter was too blissful.

朋友一听，这有何难？
The friend heard this and said, “What’s the difficulty?”

不就是一个马桶盖嘛，换！
It’s just a toilet seat cover, let’s replace it!

他在网上下单，挑了个功能最全、评价最好的，想着给老婆一个惊喜。
He ordered it online, choosing the one with the most features and the best reviews, thinking of giving his wife a surprise.

他觉得，这事儿，顶多半小时就能搞定。拆掉旧的，装上新的，齐活。
He thought, “This shouldn’t take more than half an hour.” Remove the old one, install the new one, and it’s done.

他甚至连说明书都没仔细看，凭着自己“理工男”的直觉，三下五除二就把旧马桶盖给拆了。
He didn’t even read the manual carefully, relying on his “tech guy” intuition, and quickly took apart the old toilet seat in three easy steps.

然后，他就傻眼了。
Then, he was dumbfounded.

新马桶盖的固定螺丝孔位，跟他家那个老式马桶对不上。差了大概两厘米。
The screw holes of the new toilet seat didn’t match up with his old toilet. They were off by about two centimeters.

就这两厘米，像天堑。
Just those two centimeters felt like a chasm.

他当时就有点上头。觉得不能被这点小困难打倒。
He was a bit carried away at the time. He felt he couldn’t be defeated by such a small difficulty.

他跑到五金店，想买个“转换器”之类的东西。老板听他描述了半天，摇摇头说，没见过这种东西，要么你换马桶，要么你换盖。
He ran to the hardware store, wanting to buy something like a “converter.” The owner listened to his description for a long time, shook his head, and said he had never seen such a thing. Either you replace the toilet or you replace the lid.

他心想，为了一个盖换一个马桶，这不扯淡吗？
He thought to himself, changing a toilet just for a lid, that’s ridiculous.

他回到家，盯着那个马桶，烟一根接一根地抽。突然灵机一动，我把马桶上的孔，用电钻打大一点不就行了？
He went home, staring at the toilet, smoking one cigarette after another. Suddenly, he had a flash of inspiration. What if I just drilled the holes on the toilet bigger with an electric drill?

说干就干。他从储物间翻出那套落了灰的电钻工具箱。
Get straight to it. He dug out the dusty electric drill tool kit from the storage room.

结果，电钻一开动，不是想象中的“钻孔”，而是伴随着刺耳的摩擦声和一股焦糊味，陶瓷表面被划得乱七八糟，孔没大，倒是裂了几道纹。
As a result, when the electric drill started, it wasn’t the “drilling” he imagined, but instead came with a harsh grinding sound and a smell of burnt toast. The ceramic surface was scratched up badly, and instead of making a hole, it cracked a few lines.

他老婆闻声赶来，一看马桶成了个大花脸，当时脸色就变了。
His wife heard the noise and rushed over. Seeing the toilet had become a big mess, her expression changed instantly.

“你干嘛呢？！”
“What are you doing?!”

“我……我想把孔弄大点。”
“I……I want to make the hole bigger.”

“你疯了？这陶瓷能钻吗？！”
“You’re crazy? Can this ceramic be drilled?”

两个人第一次因为这个马桶盖吵架。
It was the first time the two of them argued about the toilet seat.

朋友心里憋着一股火，觉得是自己没面子。他决定，必须把这事搞定。
The friend was seething inwardly, feeling humiliated. He decided he had to deal with this.

他又想，既然马桶不能动，那我就动马桶盖。
He thought again, since the toilet can’t be moved, then I’ll move the toilet lid.

他找来锉刀，对着马桶盖的塑料固定件，吭哧吭哧地锉。锉了半天，手都磨起泡了，发现还是不行，固定的卡槽结构太复杂，锉了这里，那里又对不上。
He found a file and started filing the plastic fasteners on the toilet lid. Filing for a long time, his hands were blistered, but still didn’t work. The fixed slot structure was too complex; filing here, it didn’t match there.

这时候，他已经折腾了快一天了。晚饭也没吃好。
By this time, he had been messing around for almost a whole day. He didn’t even have a good dinner.

晚上躺在床上，他还在想。突然又想到，这个马桶盖是智能的，得插电啊！
Lying in bed at night, he was still thinking. Suddenly, he thought of something else: this toilet lid is smart, it needs to be plugged in!

他家卫生间装修的时候，为了安全，马桶边上根本没留插座。
When renovating his bathroom, for safety reasons, no outlet was left beside the toilet.

这又是一个晴天霹雳。
This was another bolt from the blue.

第二天，他只好硬着头皮请了个电工师傅。
The next day, he had no choice but to tough it out and hire an electrician.

师傅来看了一圈，说，要从洗手台那边的插座引线过来，得在墙上开槽，布一段明线。因为卫生间墙砖都贴好了，不好走暗线。
The technician took a look around and said that to run a wire from the outlet by the sink, a slot would need to be cut in the wall and an exposed wire run. Since the bathroom tiles were already installed, it wasn’t feasible to run a hidden wire.

“开槽？那多难看啊！”他老婆坚决反对。
“Sawing slots? That would look so ugly!” his wife strongly opposed.

电工师傅摊摊手，“那没办法，除非你把墙砖敲了重新铺。”
The electrician spread his hands, “There’s no other way, unless you break the wall tiles and lay them again.”

两个人又因为这个“美观问题”大吵一架。
The two of them had another big argument over this “aesthetic issue.”

最后，还是妥协了，让师傅布明线。光这个，连工带料，花了好几百。
In the end, they compromised and had the master install the bright wire. Just for this, including labor and materials, it cost several hundred.

电解决了，马桶盖的安装问题还没解决。
The electricity issue is resolved, but the toilet seat installation problem is still unresolved.

他又不死心，在网上找各种“马桶盖安装奇葩攻略”，看到有人说可以用一种特殊的强力防水胶。
He wasn’t ready to give up and searched online for various “weird toilet seat installation guides.” He saw someone say that a special strong waterproof adhesive could be used.

他像是抓到了救命稻草，马赶紧下单。
It was like he had grasped a lifeline, and he quickly placed an order.

胶到了，他把马桶盖用胶水死死地粘在了马桶上。等胶干了，试了试，纹丝不动。
When the adhesive arrived, he firmly glued the toilet seat to the toilet with it. After the adhesive dried, he tested it, and it didn’t budge at all.

他终于松了一口气，觉得自己力挽狂澜，解决了这个世纪难题。
He finally breathed a sigh of relief, feeling like he had saved the day and solved this century-old problem.

结果，住了不到一个星期。楼下的邻居找上门了。
As a result, he stayed there for less than a week. The downstairs neighbor came looking for him.

说他家卫生间天花板在滴水。
He said that the ceiling in his bathroom was leaking.

他赶紧检查，才发现，当初他用电钻钻马桶的时候，虽然没把孔钻大，但把马桶底座的陶瓷给震出了细微的裂缝。
He quickly checked and found that when he had used the drill to drill the toilet, although he hadn’t made the hole too big, he had shaken a tiny crack in the ceramic base of the toilet.

而他粘死的马桶盖，又导致冲水时水流的压力和角度发生了微小的改变。
And his stuck toilet lid had also caused a slight change in the pressure and angle of the water flow when flushing.

水，就从那个几乎看不见的裂缝里，一点一点地渗了下去。
Water seeped out drop by drop from that almost invisible crack.

现在，问题来了。
Now, the problem comes up.

要修补那个裂缝，就必须把马桶整个拆下来。
To repair that crack, the entire toilet must be taken down.

要拆马桶，就必须先把那个用强力胶粘死的马桶盖给弄下来。
To take down the toilet, the toilet lid glued with strong adhesive must be removed first.

他试了各种办法，用刀片割，用解胶剂，都没用。最后，只能用锤子，把那个花了他一千多块、还没正经用几天的智能马桶盖，一点一点地敲碎。
He tried various methods, using a blade to cut, using a decal remover, but none worked. In the end, he could only use a hammer to slowly smash the smart toilet seat cover that had cost him over a thousand dollars and hadn’t been used properly for a few days.

敲碎的，不只是一个马桶盖。
What was smashed wasn’t just a toilet seat cover.

还有他的耐心，和他老婆的容忍。
But also his patience and his wife’s tolerance.

那几天，家里天天吵架。
Those days, the family argued every day.

老婆怪他瞎折腾，自作聪明。
Wife blames him for being reckless and overconfident.

他怪老婆要求多，没事找事。
He blames wife for being too demanding, always finding trouble.

一个原本为了“提升幸福感”的马桶盖，最终演变成：一个报废的马桶，一个被敲碎的新盖子，一笔好几千的维修费（换马桶、修楼下天花板），还有两个人半个多月的冷战。
A toilet seat originally intended to “enhance happiness” ultimately turned into: a junk toilet, a broken new seat, several thousand dollars in repair costs (toilet replacement, fixing the ceiling downstairs), and a month-long cold war between the two.

他在信息的最后问我：
At the end of the message, he asked me:

我到底做错了什么？
What did I do wrong?

我不就是想解决问题吗？为什么越努力，越糟糕？
I just wanted to solve the problem. Why does the harder I try, the worse it gets?

我看完，给他回了八个字：
After reading it, I replied with eight characters:

你错在，随意引入变量。
Your mistake lies in introducing variables arbitrarily.

他看不懂，问我什么意思。
He didn’t understand and asked me what it meant.

我说，你以为你只是在换一个“马桶盖”吗？
I said, Do you think you’re just changing a “toilet seat cover”?

不是的。
No.

你家那个用了快十年的卫生间，它是一个“稳定态的生态系统”。
The bathroom in your house, which has been used for nearly ten years, is a “stable ecosystem.”

在这个系统里，马桶的型号、水管的接口、电路的布局、墙体的结构、甚至是你们夫妻的使用习惯，彼此之间已经达成了一种微妙的平衡。
In this system, the model of the toilet, the connection of the water pipes, the layout of the circuitry, the structure of the walls, and even the usage habits of the couple, have reached a subtle balance among themselves.

它可能不完美，但它稳定、自洽。
It may not be perfect, but it is stable and self-consistent.

而你那个“智能马桶盖”，它是一个“外部变量”。
But your “smart toilet seat,” it is an “external variable.”

这个变量，携带着它自己的一套“规则”：它有自己的尺寸标准，有自己的电力需求，有自己的安装逻辑。
This variable carries its own set of “rules”: it has its own size standards, its own power requirements, and its own installation logic.

你天真地以为，可以把它像一块积木一样，简单地“放”进你的系统里。
You naively think that you can simply “place” it into your system like a building block.

你错了。
You are wrong.

当你把这个变量引入时，你实际上是在两种完全不同的规则体系之间，进行一次“强行对接”。
When you introduce this variable, you are actually performing a “forced connection” between two completely different rule systems.

结果是什么？
What is the result?

是系统性的排异反应。
It is a systemic rejection reaction.

孔位不对，是“结构排异”。
The port position is incorrect, it’s “structural rejection.”

没有插座，是“能源排异”。
There are no sockets, it’s “energy rejection.”

水流改变导致漏水，是“功能排异”。
Water flow changes causing leaks, it’s “functional rejection.”

夫妻吵架，是“情感排异”。
A couple’s argument is “emotional rejection.”

你后续的所有“努力”，钻孔、布线、打胶……你以为是在“解决问题”，其实你是在用引入更多、更混乱的“新变量”的方式，去压制上一个变量带来的问题。
All your subsequent “efforts”—drilling, wiring, applying sealant…—you think you’re “solving the problem,” but in reality, you’re suppressing the problems caused by the previous variable by introducing more and more chaotic “new variables.”

结果就是，系统彻底崩溃。
The result is that the system completely collapses.

你亲手导演了一场“由一个马桶盖引发的系统性灾难”。
You personally directed a “systemic disaster triggered by a toilet seat cover.”

生活中，绝大多数的“倒大霉”，都不是飞来横祸。
In life, the vast majority of “bad luck” is not misfortune from the heavens.

而是一场，由我们自己亲手引入的、失控的“变量”，所引发的连锁反应。
It is a chain reaction triggered by an out-of-control “variable” that we ourselves have deliberately introduced.

很多人，就是自己人生中那个最鲁莽的“变量引入者”。
Many people are the most reckless “variable introducer” in their own lives.

我有一个远房表妹，前几年特别迷恋养生。
I have a distant cousin who was particularly obsessed with health preservation a few years ago.

她不是系统地去学习中医或营养学，而是“追星式”养生。
She doesn’t study Traditional Chinese Medicine or nutrition systematically, but rather engages in “fan-like” wellness practices.

今天，在短视频上刷到，某个专家说“苦瓜是降糖神器”，她就一天三顿，凉拌苦瓜、苦瓜榨汁，变着花样地吃。
Today, while browsing short videos, she came across an expert saying “bitter melon is a diabetes-fighting miracle,” so she started eating three meals a day of cold-dressed bitter melon and bitter melon juice, coming up with various ways to consume it.

她根本没想过，自己的体质是偏寒的。
She never considered that her constitution is 偏寒 (pre-disposed to coldness).

连续吃了一个星期，整个人脸色发白，手脚冰凉，例假直接不来了。
After eating it for a whole week, her complexion turned pale, her hands and feet became cold, and her menstrual period stopped completely.

她吓坏了，又刷到一个“养生博主”，说宫寒要吃姜枣茶，补气血。
She was terrified, then she scrolled up and saw another “wellness blogger” claiming that cold uterus requires consuming ginger-red dates tea to boost qi and blood.

于是，她又开始天天猛灌姜枣茶。
So, she started drinking a lot of ginger-red dates tea every day.

结果，气血没补上来，嘴上起了满口的燎泡，晚上燥热得睡不着觉。
As a result, her qi and blood didn’t improve, but she developed canker sores all over her mouth and couldn’t sleep at night due to the heat.

她那个原本虽然有些小毛病，但总体还算平衡的身体系统，被她今天引入一个“极寒”的变量，明天又引入一个“极燥”的变量，来回冲撞，彻底搞乱了。
Her body system, which was originally slightly flawed but generally balanced, was completely thrown off balance by introducing a “extreme cold” variable today and an “extreme dryness” variable tomorrow, with constant clashes.

去看中医，大夫给她把脉，半天说不出一句话，最后叹了口气：
To see a traditional Chinese medicine doctor, the doctor took her pulse but couldn’t say a word for a long time. In the end, she sighed:

“你这身体，跟打仗一样，里面乱成一锅粥了。你自己就是那个最大的敌人。”
“This body of yours is like a battle, all kinds of chaos inside. You yourself are the biggest enemy.”

她想通过引入一个“神奇”的变量，来实现健康的“跃迁”。
She wanted to achieve a “leap” in health by introducing a “magical” variable.

却不知道，任何一个变量，进入你身体这个精密复杂的系统，都需要系统本身付出巨大的“代谢成本”。
But they don’t know that any variable entering your body, this intricate and complex system, requires the system itself to expend enormous “metabolic costs.”

当引入的变量，和你身体的“底层协议”不兼容时，它就不是补品，而是毒药。
When the introduced variable is incompatible with your body’s “底层协议” (bottom-level protocol), it is not a supplement but a poison.

它带来的不是滋养，而是无穷无尽的内耗。
It brings not nourishment, but endless internal consumption.

感情里，更是如此。
This is especially true in matters of the heart.

见过太多情侣和夫妻，关系本来好好的，非要“作死”。
Have seen too many couples and married couples who had good relationships but insisted on “pushing their luck.”

今天听人说，要有“仪式感”，就强迫那个务实的另一半，每个纪念日都必须送上昂贵的礼物，写一千字的情书。
Today, I heard someone say that there should be a “sense of ceremony,” forcing the practical half of the couple to send expensive gifts and write a thousand-word love letter on every anniversary.

对方做不到，就上纲上线，说“你就是不爱我了”。
If the other party can’t do it, they make a big deal out of it, saying, “You just don’t love me anymore.”

明天又看了一篇爆款文章，说“好的爱情需要空间”，就开始玩“欲擒故纵”，故意冷落对方，电话不接，信息不回。
Tomorrow, I read another viral article saying that “good love needs space,” and then they start playing “hard to get,” deliberately ignoring the other person, not answering calls, and not replying to messages.

对方一头雾水，关系急转直下。
The other party was baffled, and the relationship took a sharp turn.

他们那个小小的“爱情系统”，原本有着自己独特的、只属于他们两个人的相处模式、信任基础和沟通韵律。
Their little “love system,” originally had its own unique way of interacting, foundation of trust, and rhythm of communication.

这套模式，可能是每天晚上一起散步，可能是一起窝在沙发上看电视，可能是一句“我下班了”和一句“饭做好了”。
This pattern might be taking walks together every night, or cuddling up on the sofa to watch TV, or a simple “I’m off work” and “Dinner’s ready.”

它很朴素，但很稳定。
It was simple, but very stable.

而那些从外界听来的、时髦的“爱情变量”，比如“仪式感”、“空间感”、“掌控感”，就像一个个电脑病毒。
And those trendy “love variables” heard from the outside, such as “ritual sense,” “sense of space,” and “sense of control,” are like computer viruses.

你把它下载下来，不加分辨地就在你自己的“情感系统”里运行。
You download them without discernment and run them in your own “emotional system.”

结果就是，系统冲突，核心文件被篡改，最后，死机。
The result is system conflict, core files being tampered with, and finally, a crash.

分手的时候，很多人还在哭诉：我都是为了我们好啊！
When breaking up, many people are still crying: “I did it all for our good!”

你不是为了你们好。
You are not doing it for your own good.

你只是一个拙劣的系统管理员，胡乱地往自己的服务器里，安装各种来路不明的软件，还天真地以为，软件装得越多，服务器就会跑得越快。
You are just a clumsy system administrator, randomly installing all sorts of unknown software on your own server, and naively thinking that the more software you install, the faster the server will run.

商业世界，更是“变量引入”的重灾区。
The business world is even more of a “disaster area” for “variable introduction.”

一家公司，做了十几年传统制造业，产品质量过硬，客户关系稳定，现金流也很健康。
A company that has been in the traditional manufacturing industry for over ten years has solid product quality, stable customer relationships, and healthy cash flow.

老板突然去参加了一个“新零售峰会”，被台上那些“颠覆”、“赋能”、“闭环”的词搞得心潮澎湃。
The boss suddenly attended a “New Retail Summit,” where he was exhilarated by the terms like “disruption,” “empowerment,” and “closed loop” on stage.

回来就开高管会，宣布公司要“全面转型线上化”。
Upon his return, he called an executive meeting and announced that the company would “fully transition online.”

他花重金，从外面挖来一个有“大厂背景”的电商负责人。
He spent a fortune, recruiting an e-commerce head with a “major company background” from outside.

这是他引入的第一个，也是最致命的一个“变量”。
This was the first, and most fatal, “variable” he introduced.

这个新来的高管，带来了全新的“打法”。
This new senior executive has brought a completely new approach.

他要搞直播带货，要做私域流量，要投信息流广告，要铺设几百个社交媒体账号矩阵。
He wants to do live streaming e-commerce, build private domain traffic, invest in information flow ads, and set up a matrix of hundreds of social media accounts.

老板觉得，很专业，很互联网。
The boss thinks it’s very professional and very internet-like.

于是，资源全面向这个新部门倾斜。
So, all resources were shifted towards this new department.

公司的财务、人事、生产流程，全都被打乱了。
The company’s finance, HR, and production processes were all disrupted.

原来的销售团队，觉得自己的地盘被侵占了，开始消极怠工。
The original sales team, feeling that their territory was being encroached upon, began to work passively.

生产部门，被要求按照电商的“小单快反”模式来生产，完全适应不了，废品率急剧上升。
The production department, required to produce according to the “small order, quick response” model of e-commerce, couldn’t adapt and the waste rate skyrocketed.

财务部门，看着每个月几十万、上百万的广告费烧出去，销售额却没多大起色，急得像热锅上的蚂蚁。
The finance department, watching hundreds of thousands of yuan in advertising costs burn away each month with little improvement in sales, was in a state of panic.

不到一年，公司账上的现金流，被这个“电商变量”活活吞噬了。
Within less than a year, the company’s cash flow on the books was completely devoured by this “e-commerce variable.”

而那个被寄予厚望的电商部门，根本没能在这片红海里杀出来。
And that highly anticipated e-commerce department failed to make a mark in this red ocean.

因为，这家公司的“系统基因”，是to B的，是靠关系、靠品质、靠服务的。它不是to C的，不具备流量思维、内容能力和快速反应的基因。
Because, the company’s “system genes” are for B2B, relying on relationships, quality, and service. It’s not for B2C, lacking traffic thinking, content capabilities, and the gene for rapid response.

你强行把一个“C端变量”，嫁接到一个“B端系统”上，结果只有一个，就是基因突变，产生癌症。
You forcibly graft a “C-end variable” onto a “B-end system,” and the only result is a genetic mutation, producing cancer.

最后，公司资金链断裂，那个“大厂高管”拍拍屁股走了，留下一地鸡毛。
In the end, the company’s funding chain broke, and that “senior executive from a big company” walked away, leaving behind a mess.

老板在破产清算的时候，可能都想不明白。
The boss might not even understand it during bankruptcy liquidation.

我明明是顺应时代潮流，拥抱变化，为什么会死得这么惨？
I clearly followed the trend of the times, embraced change, why did I die so miserably?

因为，他混淆了“进化”和“变异”的区别。
Because, he confused the difference between “evolution” and “mutation.”

进化，是系统内部，为了适应外部环境，发生的、缓慢的、有序的、与自身基因相兼容的改变。
Evolution is a slow, orderly change within the system, adapted to the external environment, and compatible with its own genes.

变异，则是被一个强大的、不兼容的外部变量，强行入侵后，导致的、剧烈的、无序的、破坏系统根基的崩溃。
Mutation is the result of a powerful, incompatible external variable forcibly invading, leading to a violent, chaotic, and destructive collapse that undermines the foundation of the system.

我们这个时代，最大的诅咒，就是“变量”太多了。
The greatest curse of our time is the excessive number of “variables.”

打开手机，每三分钟就有一个新的风口，每五分钟就有一个新的概念，每十分钟就有一个新的“人生导师”告诉你应该怎么活。
Open your phone, and every three minutes there’s a new trend, every five minutes a new concept, and every ten minutes a new “life coach” telling you how you should live.

今天告诉你，要断舍离，极简生活。
Today, it tells you to practice minimalism and live a life of detachment.

明天告诉你，要抓住红利，人生发财靠康波。
Telling you tomorrow, to seize the dividends, life gets rich depends on Kangbo.

后天告诉你，要回归内心，寻找生命的意义。
I will tell you the day after tomorrow to return to your inner self and seek the meaning of life.

这些“变量”，像洪水一样，日夜不停地冲刷着我们那本就不牢固的“认知堤坝”。
These “variables,” like a flood, constantly erode our already fragile “cognitive dam” day and night.

于是，很多人的人生，就变成了一场“被变量驱动的布朗运动”。
Thus, the lives of many turn into a “Brownian motion driven by variables.”

毫无方向，随机乱撞。
Directionless, randomly bumping into things.

今天想去大理开客栈，明天想回老家考公务员，后天又觉得应该去学AI。
Today I want to open an inn in Dali, tomorrow I want to go back to my hometown to take the civil service exam, and the day after tomorrow I feel like I should learn AI.

买了一堆线上课，每一门都没看完。
I bought a bunch of online courses, but haven’t finished watching any of them.

加了一堆社群，在里面从不发言。
I joined a bunch of communities, but never speak in them.

收藏夹里，躺着几百篇“干货文章”，标题都是“再不看就删了”。
My favorites folder has hundreds of “useful articles,” all with titles like “Don’t watch, it’ll be deleted.”

这样的人生，看起来很热闹，很努力，充满了各种“可能性”。
This kind of life looks very lively and hardworking, full of various “possibilities”.

但本质上，是一种极度混乱和内耗的状态。
But essentially, it is a state of extreme chaos and internal consumption.

因为他的“人生操作系统”，是崩溃的。
Because his “life operating system” is crashed.

他没有一个稳定的内核，没有一套底层的“决策算法”。
He doesn’t have a stable core, nor a set of underlying “decision algorithms”.

所以，任何一个外部的“变量”，都能轻易地劫持他的注意力，修改他的航向。
So, any external “variable” can easily hijack his attention and alter his course.

他就像一艘没有罗盘和舵的船，在信息的海洋里，被浪潮推着，一会儿向东，一会儿向西。
He is like a ship without a compass and rudder, in the ocean of information, being pushed by the waves, sometimes eastward, sometimes westward.

他以为自己在“探索”，其实只是在“漂流”。
He thinks he is “exploring,” but in reality, he is just “drifting.”

而漂流的终点，大概率是触礁。
And the endpoint of drifting is most likely to run aground.

那么，破局之路在哪里？
So, where is the path to breaking the deadlock?

在于，停止“随意引入变量”，转而开始“建立你的系统”。
It lies in stopping “introducing variables arbitrarily” and instead starting to “build your system.”

什么意思？
What does it mean?

就是你要在你的人生中，建立一个强大的、稳固的、自洽的“内核系统”。
It means you need to establish a strong, stable, and coherent “core system” in your life.

这个系统，像一个“思想的防火墙”和“人生的免疫系统”。
This system, like a “firewall of thought” and a “life immune system.”

当一个新的“变量”（一种新观念、一个新机会、一种新生活方式）出现时，它不会直接冲进你的生活，引发混乱。
When a new “variable” (a new idea, a new opportunity, a new lifestyle) appears, it doesn’t directly rush into your life, causing chaos.

而是，先要经过你这个“内核系统”的审查、评估和过滤。
Instead, it must first go through the review, evaluation, and filtering of your “core system.”

系统会问：
The system will ask:

这个变量，跟我的长期目标一致吗？（目标兼容性审查）
Does this variable align with my long-term goals? (Goal Compatibility Review)

这个变量，符合我的核心价值观吗？（价值兼容性审查）
Does this variable align with my core values? (Value Compatibility Review)

我现有的能力和资源，能“消化”这个变量吗？（成本兼容性审查）
Can my existing capabilities and resources “absorb” this variable? (Cost Compatibility Review)

如果引入这个变量，它会对我的现有系统（健康、家庭、事业）产生哪些可预见的连锁反应？（系统影响评估）
If introduced, what foreseeable chain reactions will this variable have on my existing systems (health, family, career)? (System Impact Assessment)

只有通过了这一系列严格的“安检”，这个变量，才被允许“进入”你的生活。
Only after passing this series of strict “security checks” is this variable allowed to “enter” your life.

而且，不是粗暴地“闯入”，而是以一种可控的、小剂量的、可测试的方式，“融入”。
Moreover, it doesn’t forcefully “intrude” but rather integrates in a controlled, small-dose, and testable manner.

这就是高手和普通人的根本区别。
This is the fundamental difference between experts and ordinary people.

普通人的人生，是“变量驱动”的。他们是环境的产物，被动地对外界刺激做出反应。
The life of an ordinary person is “variable-driven.” They are products of their environment, passively reacting to external stimuli.

高手的人生，是“系统驱动”的。他们是环境的塑造者，主动地选择和管理进入自己世界的变量。
The life of a master is “system-driven.” They are shapers of their environment, proactively choosing and managing the variables that enter their world.

一个“系统驱动”的人，你会发现他身上有一种强大的“定力”。
A “system-driven” person, you will find, possesses a powerful “steadfastness.”

他不追风口，因为他的系统告诉他，什么是他的“主航道”。
They don’t chase trends because their system tells them what their “main course” is.

他不听各种“建议”，因为他的系统里，有自己的“决策矩阵”。
They don’t listen to various “advice” because their system has its own “decision matrix.”

他不焦虑，因为他的系统让他能够清晰地分辨，什么是他能控制的“圈内事”，什么是他无法控制的“圈外事”。
He is not anxious because his system allows him to clearly distinguish what is within his control, the “in-group matters,” and what is beyond his control, the “out-group matters.”

他的人生，不是一场混乱的、疲于奔命的救火，而是一场目标明确的、从容不迫的远航。
His life is not a chaotic, exhausting fire-fighting effort, but a goal-oriented, composed voyage.

他不是在“折腾”，而是在“构建”。
He is not “going through the motions,” but “building.”

构建他自己的事业系统，情感系统，健康系统，最终，构建一个独一无二的、丰盛自洽的生命系统。
Building his own career system, emotional system, health system, and ultimately, constructing a unique, abundant, and self-consistent life system.

看到这里，你可能会问，这个“内核系统”到底是什么？又要如何建立？
Here, you might ask, what exactly is this “kernel system”? And how is it established?

这恰恰是我过去几年一直在做的事情。
This is precisely what I have been doing over the past few years.

我把我从古今中外的经典里，从行走大地的见闻里，从无数次的与人交谈的感悟里，提炼、萃取出的那些最根本的、最能穿越时间的“规律”，打造成了一套思维模型。
I have refined and extracted the most fundamental “principles” that can transcend time from the classics of ancient and modern times, from my experiences traveling the world, and from the insights gained from countless conversations with others, into a set of thinking models.

最终，写成了一部30万字的电子书，取名为《格物心法》。
Ultimately, I wrote a 300,000-word e-book titled “The Art of Inquiry.”

“格物”，就是探究事物的本质。
“Ge Wu,” or “investigation of things,” means exploring the essence of things.

所谓建立系统，第一步，就是拥有透过现象，看见本质的能力。
The first step in establishing a system is to possess the ability to see through phenomena to grasp the essence.

比如，在“一个马桶盖引发的灾难”里，如果你懂得了《格物心法》里的“系统思维模型”，你从一开始就不会把它当成一个孤立的“零件”，而会看到它与整个“卫生间系统”千丝万缕的联系。
For example, in “A Disaster Caused by a Toilet Seat,” if you understand the “system thinking model” from the “Ge Wu Heart Method,” you won’t treat it as an isolated “component” from the beginning but will see its intricate connections with the entire “bathroom system.”

当你准备拿起电钻时，如果你脑子里有“能力圈模型”，你就会立刻停下来，问自己：这件事，在我的能力圈之内吗？我是不是应该找一个专业的人来做？
When you’re about to pick up the drill, if you have the “circle of competence model” in your mind, you’ll immediately stop and ask yourself: Is this within my circle of competence? Should I find a professional to do it?

当你面对各种“补救”方案时，如果你启动了“第二序思维模型”，你就会去推演每一种方案可能带来的、更深远的“后续后果”，而不是只看到眼前的“解决方案”。
When you face various “remedial” solutions, if you activate the “second-order thinking model,” you will deduce the deeper and more far-reaching “subsequent consequences” that each solution might bring, rather than just seeing the immediate “solution.”

你看，这些思维模型，就像一个个“杀毒软件”和“防火墙程序”，被安装在你的“人生操作系统”里。
You see, these thinking models are like 一个个 “antivirus software” and “firewall programs,” installed in your “life operating system.”

它们不能直接帮你解决“马桶盖装不上”这个具体问题。
They cannot directly help you solve the specific problem of “the toilet seat not installing.”

但它们能从根本上，阻止你做出那一连串导致“系统崩溃”的错误决策。
But they can fundamentally prevent you from making a series of wrong decisions that lead to “system collapse.”

它们给你的，不是一条鱼，而是一整套渔具和一张标明了所有暗流与礁石的航海图。
They give you not a fish, but a complete set of fishing gear and a nautical chart marked with all the undercurrents and reefs.

当然，光有理论还不够。
Of course, theory alone is not enough.

成长，是一场漫长的修行，一个人走，太容易回到原点。
Growth is a long journey of self-cultivation, and going alone makes it too easy to return to the starting point.

所以，我在几年前发起了一个成长型女性社群，叫“长青盟”。
So, a few years ago, I initiated a growth-oriented female community called “Evergreen Alliance.”

我们希望营造的，就是一个“反变量干扰”的稳定场域。
We hope to create a stable field that counteracts variable interference.

在这里，没有一夜暴富的神话，没有追逐风口的焦虑。
Here, there are no overnight success myths, no anxiety about chasing trends.

只有每天一篇原创的深度思考，帮你校准认知，保持清醒；每周一节体系化的《人生格物学》大课，帮你稳固地构建自己的内在系统。
Only daily original in-depth thinking to help you calibrate your cognition and stay clear-headed; a systematic “Philosophy of Life” course once a week to help you firmly build your own internal system.

我们陪伴你，以一种“慢”的姿态，去对抗一个“快”的时代。
We accompany you, with a “slow” pace, to resist a “fast” era.

以一种“构建”的思维，去对抗一种“折腾”的惯性。
With a “building” mindset, counteract the “wrestling” inertia.

最终，让你从一个被外界变量随意裹挟的“漂流者”，成为一个拥有强大内核系统、可以自主航行的“领航员”。
Ultimately, transform you from a “drifter” arbitrarily swept away by external variables, into a “navigator” with a robust core system, capable of sailing independently.

如果你也曾被生活中各种失控的“变量”所困扰，厌倦了那种不断折腾、不断内耗的生活。
If you have also been troubled by various uncontrollable “variables” in life, tired of the constantly wrestling, constantly consuming lifestyle.

渴望建立自己内在的定力，活出一种清醒、从容、有掌控感的人生。
Yearning to establish inner stability, to live a clear-headed, composed, and in-control life.

你可以来评论区置顶的链接看看，那里有加入“长青盟”社群，获取《格物心法》电子书的方式。
You can check the link in the pinned comment to see how to join the “Evergreen Alliance” community and get the e-book “The Method of Investigating Things.”

这或许是你今年为自己混乱的生活，引入的最后一个，但却是最有价值的一个“变量”。
This might be the last “variable” you introduce into your chaotic life this year, but it is the most valuable one.

一个能帮你终结所有混乱的变量。
A variable that can help you end all chaos.

声明：本文来自《大亮日记》专栏
Disclaimer: This article is from the “Dalian Diary” column.

文章时常被删屏蔽，如有收获，可在评论区获取本篇《大亮日记》5000字PDF版
The article is often censored or blocked. If you gain something, you can get the 5000-word PDF version of this “Dalian Diary” in the comments.

我是大亮，长青盟主理人，源头日记合伙人，600+创始人的商业顾问
I am Dalian, the leader of the Evergreen Alliance, a partner of Yuanquan Diary, and a business advisor to 600+ founders.

长青盟，是专为成长型女性打造的终身成长社群。
Evergreen Alliance is a lifelong growth community created specifically for growth-oriented women.

我们不止是一个社群，更是一个深度融合了「私域电商」x「知识付费」x「自媒体赋能」的完整成长生态。
It is not just a community, but a complete growth ecosystem that deeply integrates ‘private domain e-commerce’ x ‘knowledge payment’ x ‘influencer empowerment’.

我们陪伴你，以品质健康生活为基石，以精神富足为内核，最终成长为能够持续盈利的超级个体。
We accompany you, with quality and healthy living as the foundation, spiritual fulfillment as the core, ultimately growing into a super individual capable of sustainable profitability.

高学历，低能量，拖垮职场年轻人 2026-01-07 阅读需要17分钟 撰文｜江郁琦 编辑｜崔玉敏
High education, low energy, dragging down young people in the workplace 2026-01-07 Reading time: 17 minutes Written by Jiang Yuqi Edited by Cui Yumin

近几年，在同龄人思考如何升职、升学的同时，疲惫感正在另一群年轻人之中蔓延。容易疲惫、难以集中精神、身体无法启动，好像“死人微活”，他们称自己为“低能量人”。
In recent years, while peers are thinking about promotions and further education, fatigue has been spreading among another group of young people. They easily feel tired, struggle to concentrate, and their bodies seem unable to start—like “almost-dead micro-alive,” they call themselves “low-energy people.”

大多数低能量人并不是天生就处于低能量的状态。相反，他们或被经济高速增长塑造过，或是“内卷”战争的胜出者。他们往往拥有高学历和体面的工作，仍保持着一定的职业目标，当他们进入职场，面对高强度工作、 “压力成瘾“驱动下的工作方式，精力池便愈发干涸，能量也在不知不觉间耗散。
Most low-energy people are not naturally in a low-energy state. On the contrary, they have either been shaped by rapid economic growth or emerged victorious in the “involution” war. They often possess high academic qualifications and respectable jobs, yet still maintain certain career goals. When they enter the workplace, facing high-intensity work and a work style driven by “stress addiction,” their energy reserves dry up, and their energy is gradually consumed without realizing it.

01 崩盘
01 Collapse

许善言发现自己迟迟无法启动，去写一份第二天就要提交的文案。
Xu Shanyan found that she kept procrastinating and couldn’t start writing a copy that was due the next day.

拖延症在去年愈发严重。每到夜晚9点，许善言刚将女儿哄睡，本该迎来沉浸式工作的夜晚。但头脑昏沉的她，却难以从床上起身。这种低精力状态，已经绵延数日。这天清早，她刚坐进办公室，就被倦意击中。她需要核对几份格式不一的商务文件，但她心烦意乱，手指点击着鼠标，电脑屏幕不断地提醒“格式错误”。
Procrastination became increasingly severe last year. Every night at 9 p.m., when Xu Shanyan had just put her daughter to sleep, she was supposed to start her immersive work. But with her mind foggy, she found it hard to get out of bed. This low-energy state had lasted for several days. That morning, as soon as she sat at her office desk, she was struck by exhaustion. She needed to review several business documents with inconsistent formats, but she was too distracted, her fingers clicking the mouse as the computer screen constantly reminded her of “format errors.”

许善言只好先切换掉这部分需要耐心的工作。她查看手机的微信群消息，试图完成一些只需简单回复的工作。但坐在工位上，许善言困乏不已，从前一下午就能搞定的商务文件，她在工位从早上鼓捣到晚上九点，还没能核对完。挫败之下，她只能先回家，拍摄制作自己自媒体平台上第二天要投放的一个广告。
Xu Shanyan had no choice but to switch to a task that required patience. She checked her phone’s WeChat group messages, trying to complete some work that only needed simple replies. But sitting at her desk, Xu Shanyan was too exhausted. Business documents that she used to finish in one afternoon now took her from morning until 9 p.m. at her desk, and she still hadn’t finished reviewing them. Frustrated, she could only go home to film an advertisement for her self-media platform to be posted the next day.

到家后，在办公室的倦怠感仍然侵袭着她。夜里9点，终于哄娃睡着时，许善言陷入深深的困乏感，她抬起眼皮，视线模糊地看到柔光灯下的卧室，意识终于被倦意淹没。等她醒来时，已是凌晨1点，她努力让自己清醒，坐在电脑前。
Even at home, the fatigue from the office still plagued her. At 9 p.m. that night, after finally putting her child to sleep, Xu Shanyan was overcome with deep exhaustion. She lifted her eyelids, her vision blurry as she saw the bedroom bathed in soft light, and her consciousness was finally submerged in sleepiness. When she woke up, it was already 1 a.m. She struggled to stay awake, sitting in front of her computer.

一再拖延的自媒体文案、不断出错的工作，33岁的许善言发觉自己陷入“低能量”状态。许善言在一家采购中心担任招投标专员将近六年，工作朝9晚5。过去几年，她是一位高效能的职场人，带娃之余，本职工作做得得心应手，业余还在做自媒体副业，能独立操刀拍摄、文案，现在，她的账号已经积攒了一定粉丝，年末能接到一些广告投放。但如今，广告交付的压力催促着她，本该晚上9点左右完成的文案，许善言拖到凌晨4点才制作完。
Her repeated procrastination on self-media copywriting and constant work errors had made 33-year-old Xu Shanyan realize she had fallen into a “low-energy” state. Xu Shanyan has been working as a tendering specialist in a procurement center for nearly six years, with a 9-to-5 work schedule. In the past few years, she was an efficient professional, handling her primary job with ease while raising her child, and even running a self-media side business where she independently handled filming and copywriting. Her account had accumulated a certain number of followers, and by the end of the year, she could take on some advertising placements. But now, the pressure of delivering ads was urging her, and a copy that should have been finished around 9 p.m. was only completed by 4 a.m.

当许善言和自己陷入低能量的身体试图争夺掌控权时，26岁的叶椰已经深陷“低能量”的漩涡4年。
When Xu Shanyan and himself were struggling for control with their low-energy bodies, 26-year-old Ye Ye had already been deep in the vortex of “low energy” for 4 years.

叶椰在老家的工作相对轻松，朝9晚5，包午餐。但对于她来说，吃早餐、起床已然成为一桩难题。早上上班经过家附近的711便利店“选食物、排队、付账”，这一系列流程让她感到“很累”，她有一阵总是不吃早餐。
Ye Yeys job at her hometown is relatively light, with a 9-to-5 schedule and lunch included. But for her, eating breakfast and getting up had become a real challenge. The routine of “selecting food, queuing, and paying” at the 7-Eleven convenience store near her home on her way to work made her feel “tired,” and she often skipped breakfast for a while.

对于叶椰来说，“日常生活一直是西西弗斯的一场大型推石头活动”。对健康人来说，洗澡、起床、做家务像喝水走路一样自然，但对低精力的叶椰来说，这些都构成挑战。尤其是深陷糟糕情绪中又难以启动自己去洗澡时，她看着“脏脏的自己”加剧难过。后来，为改善洗澡拖延，她会通过给手机装上防水手机壳、边追剧边洗澡，或先预定一个早上的外卖送到公司等方式，帮助自己启动完成洗澡或吃早餐。
For Ye Yey, “daily life has always been like Sisyphus pushing a large boulder.” For healthy people, showering, getting up, and doing household chores are as natural as drinking water and walking. But for Ye Yey, who lacks energy, these tasks pose challenges. Especially when she was deep in bad moods and struggled to motivate herself to shower, she would feel even more upset looking at her “dirty self.” Later, to improve her shower procrastination, she would use methods like installing a waterproof phone case on her phone, showering while watching dramas, or pre-ordering breakfast delivery to her company to help herself start and complete showering or eating breakfast.

图片描述
Image Description

图 ｜ 2024年5月，叶椰用制作家务表单提醒自己做家务
Figure | In May 2024, Ye Ye used a household chore reminder form to remind herself of chores

叶椰的精力崩盘始于2020年，她还在国外读研，北欧绵延的冬天和漫长的夜晚，独居的叶椰慢慢陷入一种昼伏夜出的生活：疫情时上网课，她可以在一天之内修完一周的功课。同时，她还进入一家知名企业实习。那份24小时待命的实习工作里，公司凌晨发来通知，叶椰立刻打开电脑为项目进行信息检索。上午开完商务会，下午她就能给客户出方案。她当时20出头，自恃身体年轻能扛， 3个月后，2021年冬天，叶椰发现自己日常的生活开始失控，难以起床、吃饭。
Ye Ye’s energy collapse began in 2020 when she was still studying abroad. The long, Nordic winters and endless nights led the solitary Ye Ye to gradually fall into a day-night reversed lifestyle: during the pandemic, she could complete a week’s worth of coursework in one day while taking online classes. At the same time, she interned at a well-known company. The 24/7 internship required her to open her computer immediately upon receiving notifications from the company at midnight to conduct information searches for projects. After morning business meetings, she could present solutions to clients in the afternoon. She was in her early twenties at the time and relied on her youthful body to endure it. Three months later, in the winter of 2021, Ye Ye found that her daily life had begun to spiral out of control, struggling to get out of bed and eat.

回国时，精力不振的她难以适应高强度的工作，最终选择了一份老家朝9晚5的offer。2024年4月，叶椰开始在互联网上分享自己进行“低能量人”的精力管理方式，她试着逐渐建立起生活的秩序感。
When she returned home, her lack of energy made it difficult for her to adapt to high-intensity work, and she ultimately chose a 9-to-5 job in her hometown. In April 2024, Ye Ye began sharing her methods for managing energy as a “low-energy person” online, trying to gradually establish a sense of order in her life.

越来越多的职场年轻人纷纷确诊类似的感受，一再拖延、容易疲惫、难以集中精神、身体似乎无法启动，好像“死人微活”，他们开始称自己为“低能量人”。
More and more young professionals are increasingly experiencing similar feelings—repeated procrastination, easy fatigue, difficulty concentrating, and a sense that their bodies can’t seem to start, as if they are “almost dead but barely alive.” They begin to call themselves “low-energy people.”

在社交媒体上，#低能量人自救指南#话题累计获过亿次浏览。与之形成镜像的是，”高能量职场人”的精力管理学说在知识付费领域异军突起，在知识付费相关课程具有相当高的完课率。
On social media, the hashtag #LowEnergyPeopleSelfRescueGuide# has accumulated billions of views. In contrast, the concept of “high-energy workplace management” has emerged as a rising star in the knowledge payment sector, with related courses having a remarkably high completion rate.

02 陷入低能量漩涡
02 Entering the Low-Energy Vortex

陷入低能量状态的年轻人并不是在学业竞争中被甩下的那批人。相反，他们中的许多人都就读于国内外名校，成绩名列前茅。但，“心无旁骛地向着唯一目标冲刺”的竞争策略，在进入职场以后似乎失灵了。
Young people who have fallen into a low-energy state are not the ones left behind in academic competition. On the contrary, many of them have attended top universities both domestically and internationally, ranking among the top students. However, the competitive strategy of “focusing solely on the single goal without distraction” seems to fail once they enter the workplace.

对于刚刚进入职场几个月的毛胜贤来说，“低能量”同样覆盖了她的工作和生活。毛胜贤大学就读于一所211大学的传媒专业，2024年11月，她入职一家视频平台的节目策划岗位。
For Mao Shengxian, who had just entered the workforce for a few months, “low energy” also affected her work and life. Mao Shengxian studied media at a 211 university. In November 2024, she joined a video platform as a program planning officer.

2025年2月中旬，她需要拜访一位研究社区改造项目的负责人。等待会面对象时，毛胜贤发现自己“站不住”，她蹲下，把身体缩成一团，似乎这样“气更容易上来”。负责人到场后，谈话进行到两小时时，毛胜贤发现自己的视线已经无法聚焦，谈话对象的面目在她面前几乎重影。
In mid-February 2025, she needed to visit the head of a community renovation project. While waiting for the meeting, Mao Shengxian found she couldn’t stand straight. She crouched down, curling her body into a ball, as if this made it easier for her “qi” to rise. After the person in charge arrived, two hours into the conversation, Mao Shengxian realized her vision had lost focus, and the person she was talking to seemed to blur in front of her.

毛胜贤怀疑自己病了。去年年底，她到医院做了两次体检，分别检查出炎症和贫血。毛胜贤开始吃保健品，她购买了维生素D、复合维生素、阿胶糕对应解决贫血问题。有时熬夜觉得心脏不适，她会吃一片辅酶10。现在，每晚睡前，毛胜贤要吞下三到四种药片，早上，要就着红参汁嚼一片阿胶糕，这一度比她的睡眠和三餐还要规律。
Mao Shengxian suspected she was sick. At the end of last year, she had two physical check-ups at the hospital, which revealed inflammation and anemia. Mao Shengxian started taking health supplements, purchasing vitamin D, compound vitamins, and Ejiao cakes to address her anemia. Sometimes, when staying up late caused discomfort in her heart, she would take a Coenzyme 10 tablet. Now, every night before bed, Mao Shengxian has to swallow three to four pills, and in the morning, she chews an Ejiao cake with ginseng juice, which has become more regular than her sleep and meals.

图片描述
Image Description

图 ｜ 毛胜贤服用的营养补剂的一部分
Figure | Some of the nutritional supplements taken by Mao Shengxian

虽然被低能量打乱生活的年轻人似乎都处在“亚健康”的状态，但“低能量”本身却不是一种正式的疾病。陷入低能量状态以致生活失序，更像是从一个人生阶段过渡到另一个人生阶段时产生的阵痛。
While young people whose lives seem disrupted by low energy are often described as being in a “sub-healthy” state, “low energy” itself is not a formal medical condition. Falling into a state of low energy to the point where daily life becomes chaotic is more like the cramp during the transition from one life stage to another.

作为高考竞技场的胜出者，中学到大学阶段，毛胜贤会在早起熬夜、高强度地备考一个月以后迎来一个完全放空的假期。成绩单上漂亮的分数是对她努力的明确反馈。
As a winner in the high-stakes Gaokao competition, during the transition from high school to university, Mao Shengxian would look forward to a completely relaxed vacation after a month of early mornings, late nights, and intense preparation. The impressive scores on her report card were a clear reflection of her efforts.

但开始工作以后事情变得不太一样。撰写策划案、制作PPT、到活动现场彩排……工作接踵而至，完成后迎来的往往不是假期，而是下一项工作。毛胜贤常常在刚刚上交一版策划案之后立刻收到消息：“谢谢你，胜贤。这里还有个PPT，刚好你空了，你也做一下吧。”而无论多晚，她也会照要求做完。
However, things changed after she started working. Writing proposals, creating PowerPoint presentations, rehearsing at event venues… work came one after another, and the holidays that followed were often just the start of the next task. Mao Shengxian frequently received messages right after submitting a proposal: “Thanks, Shengxian. Here’s another PPT. You’re free now, why don’t you take a look?” No matter how late it was, she would complete it as requested.

毛胜贤的疲惫，源自长期熬夜与过劳带来的生理性耗竭。据《2025年中国睡眠健康研究白皮书》显示，截至2025年2月，我国18岁及以上人群平均睡眠时长6.85小时，其中1/4人群睡眠不足6小时，低于健康标准（7-9小时）。且睡眠质量评分低，长期睡眠不足导致皮质醇水平升高，直接影响记忆力和情绪稳定性。
Mao Shengxian’s exhaustion stems from physiological depletion caused by long-term sleep deprivation and overwork. According to the “2025 China Sleep Health Research White Paper,” as of February 2025, the average sleep duration for people aged 18 and above in China is 6.85 hours, with 1/4 of the population sleeping less than 6 hours, falling below the healthy standard (7-9 hours). Additionally, low sleep quality scores, resulting from chronic sleep deprivation, lead to elevated cortisol levels, directly impacting memory and emotional stability.

其次还有慢性疾病的年轻化。而根据上海外服联合《大众医学》发布的《2019上海白领健康指数报告》，上海白领体检异常率已接近 99%，其中抑郁、脱发、肠胃问题等在90后人群增长率显著。
Secondly, there is the issue of the youngerization of chronic diseases. According to the “2019 Shanghai White Collar Health Index Report” jointly released by Shanghai Foreign Service and “Public Health,” the abnormal check-up rate among Shanghai white-collar workers has approached 99%, with significant growth in conditions such as depression, hair loss, and gastrointestinal issues among the post-90s generation.

而毛胜贤的工作中，那些让她感到疲累的，还包括工作中需要反复修改的方案，导致的职场人的决策疲劳感。而在资本主义“异化”的劳动理论中也提出，在现代社会，工作成果与劳动者的分离、劳动过程的无限碎片化，也会导致劳动者意义感的缺失。
In Mao Shengxian’s work, the factors contributing to her exhaustion also include the need to repeatedly revise plans, leading to decision fatigue among office workers. The labor theory of “alienation” in capitalism also suggests that in modern society, the separation of work outcomes from laborers and the infinite fragmentation of the labor process can lead to a sense of meaninglessness among workers.

除难以掌控的高强度的工作外，职场人 “精力危机”的另一重原因，还可能是因直面家庭、职场的阶段，人生发生了很多变化。但人的精力管理模式，却没有跟着发生变化，导致各方面力不从心。
Beyond the uncontrollable high-intensity work, another reason for the “energy crisis” among office workers may be the direct confrontation with life changes in both family and career phases. However, the management of human energy levels has not evolved accordingly, resulting in a feeling of being overwhelmed in various aspects.

当33岁的许善言进入工作、家庭、带娃的多线程模式时，她用透支自己的时间、违背昼夜节律（正常的昼夜节律，为“活动”-“休息“每24小时循环一次）的方式，不止不休地运转，却忘记给予身体应有的恢复周期，进行能量的恢复。
When 33-year-old Xu Shanyan enters the multi-threaded mode of work, family, and childcare, she operates non-stop, depleting her own time and violating the circadian rhythm (the normal circadian rhythm cycles between “activity” and “rest” every 24 hours), yet forgetting to give her body the necessary recovery period to restore energy.

美国作家吉姆·洛尔和托尼·施瓦茨曾在书籍《精力管理》一书中指出，相较于时间管理中的强调自律，认为休息是可耻的，精力管理尊重放松的价值，顺应大脑的工作方式。而压力不是敌人，缺乏恢复才是。
American writers Jim Loehr and Tony Schwartz, in their book “The Power of Full Engagement,” pointed out that compared to time management’s emphasis on self-discipline, which views rest as shameful, energy management respects the value of relaxation and aligns with the way the brain works. Stress is not the enemy; lack of recovery is.

而叶椰、毛胜贤，则是不自觉深陷于“压力成瘾”的驱动下，在学业和职场生涯中一路拼杀。2019年，叶椰读大三时，她目睹身边的优秀同学冲击牛津、剑桥的申请。叶椰自己则在几个月内，完成期末考试、通过一次专业考试，并独立完成申请一间英国名校的全部工作。
Meanwhile, Ye Ye and Mao Shengxian are unconsciously driven by the “stress addiction” and have been fighting their way through academic and career paths. In 2019, when Ye Ye was a junior, she witnessed her outstanding classmates applying to Oxford and Cambridge. Ye Ye herself completed her final exams, passed one professional exam, and independently handled all the work for applying to a top British university within a few months.

图片描述
Image Description

图 ｜ 期末考时叶椰和朋友一起通宵答题
Figure | Ye Ye and her friends stayed up all night answering questions during the final exam

根据《精力管理》，狂热的不停歇的工作节奏，会滋生肾上腺素、皮质醇等让人亢奋的压力荷尔蒙。而狂热工作带来的快感，会激励人愈发本能地逼迫自己工作。叶椰也一度陷入这样的超速怪圈，但这样的成瘾行为，最终会导致精力储备的极致消耗，最终导致人体能的直接崩溃。
According to “Energy Management,” a frenzied and relentless work pace can produce adrenaline, cortisol, and other stimulatory stress hormones. The pleasure brought by this intense work can motivate people to push themselves even more instinctively. Ye Ye once fell into this accelerated trap, but such addictive behavior ultimately leads to the extreme depletion of energy reserves, ultimately resulting in a direct collapse of physical strength.

03 如何自救
03 How to Save Yourself

低能量的职场人，在工作时感到疲惫日久，在接下来还要延续数十年的职场生涯中，他们希望精巧地通过精力上的节流，保持情绪灵活，不工作时及时清空大脑等开源方式，找到真正为自己充电的事情，达到提升精力值、胜任职场工作，同时平衡好生活的目的。
Low-energy workers, feeling exhausted at work over time, hope to cleverly manage their energy through conservation during the next decades of their career. They aim to maintain emotional flexibility, clear their minds promptly when not working, and find activities that truly recharge them. This approach seeks to boost energy levels, perform well in their careers, and balance their lives.

《精力管理》一书中指出，精力管理四法则： 重视恢复周期，遵循生命节奏 ， 避免压力成瘾 ，实现能力扩展。书中提出精力管理的四个维度，对体能精力、情感精力、思维精力、意志精力进行恢复和提升。而“精力管理”的关键，是能否有规律的工作与休息，达成能量补充与消耗的平衡。
《Energy Management》 points out the four principles of energy management: value the recovery cycle, follow the rhythm of life, avoid stress addiction, and achieve capacity expansion. The book proposes four dimensions of energy management, focusing on restoring and enhancing physical energy, emotional energy, mental energy, and willpower energy. The key to “energy management” lies in having a regular work and rest schedule to achieve a balance between energy replenishment and consumption.

2023年，博主携隐Melody在播客《纵横四海》中，曾讲到《精力管理：如何从无法抹去的疲惫感中恢复》中，提到让精力池能够拓宽的方式，帮助人走出精力不足的困境，发挥出应有水平。这则讲述现代人“精力管理”的播客内容累计了99万加的播放量。
In 2023, blogger Carry Hidden Melody discussed in the podcast “Roaming the Four Seas” about “Energy Management: How to Recover from Unshakeable Fatigue,” mentioning ways to broaden the energy pool to help people overcome energy deficiency and perform at their best. This podcast content on “energy management” for modern people has accumulated over 990,000 plays.

在工作多年的职场人李鑫看来，进行精力管理的目标，是要建立对工作和生活的掌控感。
In the eyes of Li Xin, a career professional with years of experience, the goal of energy management is to establish a sense of control over work and life.

李鑫在一家广告公司担任文案。他对自己的生活规划常常是精确到“小时”。早晨8：30起床，做早饭，带一颗水煮蛋去上班，10点准时打卡上班。工作，十二点左右午休，下午一点恢复工作，七点准时打卡下班，七点半回到家，吃晚饭。每周有三天会在下班后前往健身房，其它的时间可能会和室友一起看电影。
Li Xin works as a copywriter at an advertising company. His life planning is often precise down to the “hour.” He wakes up at 8:30 AM, makes breakfast, takes a boiled egg to work, and clocks in at 10:00 AM on time. Work, take a lunch break around 12:00 PM, resume work at 1:00 PM, clock out at 7:00 PM on time, and arrive home at 7:30 PM for dinner. Three days a week, he goes to the gym after work, and on the other days, he might watch movies with his roommate.

李鑫说：“我一般只有体力上的，觉得困了或者累了，很少陷入那种精神上的疲惫。”这得益于他对于工作的掌控感。这种掌控体现在，他会对工作下一个非常清晰的判断：一篇文案，留给他的写作时间有多长、他收集完资料、写出大纲、交出初稿的时间分别有多少……在完成自己的计划之后，他从不会额外给自己加班。
Li Xin says, “I usually only feel physically tired, feeling sleepy or exhausted, and rarely fall into mental fatigue.” This is thanks to his sense of control over his work. This control is reflected in his very clear judgment about his work: how much time he has to write a piece of copy, how long it takes to gather materials, outline it, and submit the first draft… After completing his plan, he never works overtime.

去年10月，部门接了一个比较急的工作。周五五点左右，李鑫交稿，比预计时间早了两个小时。对接甲方的同事提醒他：“李老师，你要做好周日加班的准备，因为客户可能会在这时候提出一些新的要求。”
Last October, the department took on a relatively urgent project. Around 5:00 PM on Friday, Li Xin submitted his draft, two hours earlier than expected. A colleague who was coordinating with the client reminded him, “Teacher Li, you should be prepared to work overtime on Sunday, because the client might have some new requests at this time.”

李鑫说：“我已经交稿了，而且我周末计划了出门旅行。如果有什么要求我周一早点来处理，不急这一天半天。”他对工作的判断已经十分笃定，也会清晰树立工作和生活的分界。在那些可能会出现问题的时候全情投入地工作，不会出问题的时候则彻底地放松。
Li Xin said, “I’ve already submitted the manuscript, and I’ve planned to travel over the weekend. If there’s anything that needs to be handled early on Monday, I can do so without any rush for half a day.” His judgment about work is already very firm, and he will clearly establish a boundary between work and life. He will fully commit to work when there might be problems, and completely relax when there are none.

而从2025年1月上旬，睡前，10点左右，许善言开始写日记总结自己过去一段时间的状态。首先，她记下了自己的“累”。接着，尝试把这个词具象化，更准确地描述自己的感受。
Since early January 2025, at around 10 p.m. before bed, Xu Shanyan began writing a diary to summarize her state over the past period. First, she recorded her “exhaustion.” Then, she tried to concretize this word, describing her feelings more accurately.

对自身精力状态的觉察在慢慢恢复。许善言发现，她的“累”其实是“困”“涣散”和“迷茫”。困，是因为“作息完全紊乱了”。涣散，是因为“长时间看手机，浏览大量碎片化信息（这是能量消耗物）”。迷茫，是因为她总是在“为未发生的事感到焦虑”，她过于担心33岁之后的人生，忽视了当下的感受。
Awareness of one’s energy state is gradually returning. Xu Shanyan found that her “fatigue” was actually “sleepiness,” “scatterbrained,” and “confusion.” Sleepiness, because “her sleep schedule was completely disrupted.” Scatterbrained, because “long periods of smartphone use and browsing large amounts of fragmented information (this is an energy drain).” Confusion, because she was always “anxious about things that hadn’t happened yet,” overly worried about life after turning 33 and ignoring her current feelings.

许善言对自己的精力状态重新变得敏感。23:00点睡时和凌晨1点睡时，身体的感受有明显的区别。“一点睡的时候，很明显感觉身体是‘垮’的，而且会有淡淡的黑眼圈”。
Xu Shanyan has once again become sensitive to her energy state. There is a noticeable difference in physical sensations between going to sleep at 23:00 and 01:00. “When I go to sleep at 01:00, I can clearly feel my body is ‘collapsing,’ and I also have faint dark circles under my eyes.”

许善言还发现，如果早上6点要起，那么晚上在10:30点半前入睡就能保持能量充沛。如果中午午睡了，晚上就会到11点才能慢慢入睡。中午没有午睡的话，10点就能“一沾枕头就睡着”。如果喝了奶茶或咖啡，就要在白天喝两大杯水才能正常地入睡。
Xu Shanyan also discovered that if she needs to wake up at 06:00, going to sleep by 10:30 or 10:45 allows her to maintain energy. If she takes a midday nap, she won’t be able to fall asleep until around 11:00 at night. Without a midday nap, she can “fall asleep the moment her head touches the pillow” at 10:00. If she drinks milk tea or coffee, she needs to drink two large glasses of water during the day to fall asleep normally.

曾经的低能量者们努力将精力管理变成生活中的习惯。他们通过形成某种“仪式”建立良性循环。
The once low-energy individuals are working hard to turn energy management into a habit in their lives. They establish a positive cycle by creating certain “rituals.”

许善言下午5点下班，6点左右到家。一进门，她就钻进洗手间，卸妆、洗脸、洗澡、换上家居服。这是一个仪式，用来分割“工作”与“休息”的状态。换上家居服以后，一天的休息时间就正式开始了。
Xu Shanyan left work at 5 PM and arrived home around 6. As soon as she entered, she headed straight to the bathroom to remove her makeup, wash her face, take a shower, and change into her loungewear. This was a ritual to mark the transition between the “work” and “rest” states. Once she was dressed in her loungewear, the official rest period of the day began.

对于叶椰来说，她学会了不将稀缺的意志力，反复消耗在“今天要不要做“的问题上。
For Ye Ye, she had learned not to repeatedly deplete her scarce willpower on the question of “whether to do it today.”

对自己身体感受相对迟钝的叶椰，开始给自己做实验。怎么样判断自己是不是饿了，需不需要吃早餐？别怀疑，直接去吃点东西。如果某天正在做事时感到精神涣散无法专注，但自己并不抵触这件事。那就试试吃一些碳水足够的食物。如果奏效，说明刚刚那个感觉叫饿。
Ye Ye, who was relatively insensitive to her body’s sensations, began conducting experiments on herself. How to determine if she was hungry and needed breakfast? Don’t doubt it—just go eat something. If one day she felt distracted and unable to focus while working, but wasn’t opposed to it, she would try eating some food with sufficient carbohydrates. If it worked, it meant she was actually hungry.

毛胜贤仍然被卡在低能量的状态之中。但今年3月的一天，夜里十点，毛胜贤得知自己刚刚做完的PPT要推翻重做。因为同事给出的文案出现了大量的错误，需要“尽快”重新替换，她在工作群里回复“好的”，感到无力的同时还感受到一股怒气。距离她日常的睡觉时间还有两个小时，通常，她会利用这两个小时进行工作，可能会熬夜，但“尽快”把工作完成上交。
Mao Shengxian was still stuck in a low-energy state. But one day in March of this year, at 10 PM, Mao Shengxian learned that the PPT she had just finished would need to be redone from scratch. Because the copy provided by a colleague contained numerous errors and needed to be “replaced as soon as possible,” she replied “Okay” in the work group chat, feeling powerless while also experiencing a surge of anger. There were still two hours before her usual bedtime, and typically, she would use these hours for work, possibly staying up late, but to “complete it as soon as possible” and submit it.

但在那天，毛胜贤直接关掉了电脑，爬上床，戴上眼罩，准备明天早上再说。她将在第二天上午十点听到两声闹铃，起床后到住处大门外的第二个路口吃一碗豆花，她形容自己就像“一团棉花怒了一下”。不过，这也许也会是她走出低能量状态的第一步。
But that day, Mao Shengxian directly turned off the computer, climbed into bed, put on a sleep mask, and decided to wait until the next morning. She would hear two alarm sounds at ten a.m. the next day, get up, and go to the second intersection outside the main entrance of her residence to have a bowl of tofu pudding. She described herself as “a lump of cotton that had gotten angry.” However, this might also be the first step for her to move out of her low-energy state.

*应受访者要求，文中人物信息有模糊。
*As requested by the respondent, the character information in the text has been blurred.

*文章原载于真实故事计划，关注我们，这里将持续推出好看有深度的优质长文。
*Originally published on the Real Story Project. Follow us for more high-quality, in-depth long articles to be released here.

• END-

讲一个大多数女性都不愿意接受的真相 2026-01-04 阅读需要9分钟 这个真相就是，真正优秀的男人，往往是极度理性和现实的，甚至充满算计。绝大多数女生所期待的那种“向上兼容”的婚姻或者爱情，本质上是一种违背经济学规律的幻想，而这种幻想正在毁掉很多人原本可以获得的幸福
A truth most women are unwilling to accept 2026-01-04 Reading time: 9 minutes This truth is that truly excellent men are often highly rational and realistic, even calculating. The kind of “upward compatible” marriage or love that most girls expect is fundamentally a fantasy that defies economic principles, and this fantasy is destroying the happiness that many people could have originally obtained.

在过去的几十年里，我们国家处于一个高速增量时代。那时候，机会遍地都是，很多男性的确可以通过奋斗实现阶层的快速跃迁。在当时男人找老婆，确实更看重这个女人是不是贤惠，能不能持家，或者长得好不好看。因为他在外面打拼赚的钱足够多，他需要的是一个稳定的后方。哪怕女生弱势一点，只要男人有良心，日子也能过得蒸蒸日上，这就给人造成了一种错觉，觉得找个好男人就能改变命运。
In the past few decades, our country was in a high-speed incremental era. Back then, opportunities were everywhere, and many men could indeed achieve rapid class mobility through hard work. At that time, when men looked for a wife, they indeed valued whether the woman was virtuous, able to manage the household, or how attractive she was. Because the money they earned outside was enough, they needed a stable 后方. Even if the woman was a bit weaker, as long as the man had a conscience, their life could still be prosperous, which created a 错觉 that finding a good man could change one’s fate.

但现在不一样了，我们已经进入了一个存量博弈的时代。
But things are different now; we have entered an era of 存量博弈.

赚钱越来越难，不管是大厂的程序员还是体制内的公务员，谁不是在那苦苦支撑。在这个背景下，优质男性的择偶策略已经发生了根本性的变化。那些真正处于中上层，或者有潜力进入中上层的男性，他们现在比任何时候都更现实。他们不再是在找一个“需要被照顾的公主”
Making money is becoming increasingly difficult, whether it’s programmers from big companies or civil servants within the system, who isn’t struggling to hold on. Against this backdrop, the mating strategies of high-quality men have undergone fundamental changes. Those who are truly in the middle to upper class, or have the potential to enter it, are now more realistic than ever. They are no longer looking for a “princess who needs to be taken care of.”

，而是
Instead,

在找一个“能并肩作战的合伙人”。
they are looking for a “partner who can fight side by side.”

这就是很多女生不愿意接受的第一个真相：在当下的环境里，真正优秀的男人选择伴侣时，潜意识里首先计算的是，这个女人能不能帮我分担风险，能不能在这个不确定的时代里跟我一起构筑一道抗风险的防线。
This is the first truth that many girls are unwilling to accept: in the current environment, truly outstanding men, when choosing a partner, subconsciously calculate first whether this woman can help share risks and whether she can build with me a defense line against risks in this uncertain era.

因为他们也是人，他们也累，他们也面临着巨大的社会竞争压力。如果你能提供的仅仅是年轻貌美，或者是需要被无限包容的“情绪需求”，那在他们眼里，你其实是一个负负资产。因为美貌是贬值资产，而情绪需求是巨大的消
Because they are also humans, they get tired, and they also face immense social competitive pressure. If all you can offer is youth and beauty, or the need for infinite tolerance in terms of “emotional demands,” then in their eyes, you are actually a negative asset. Because beauty is a depreciating asset, and emotional demands are a huge consumption.

耗品。
Consumables.

我经常看到一些女生，自身条件其实很普通，学历、工作、家庭背景都在及格线上下，但对另一半的要求却往往对标社会的顶层精英。
I often see some girls who are actually quite ordinary in their own conditions, with academic backgrounds, jobs, and family backgrounds all around average, but they often set their standards for a partner as high as the top elite of society.

她们希望对方既要有足以跨越阶层的经济实力，又要有能提供这种高情绪价值的温柔体贴，还要有随叫随到的时间。这就是典型的想用“白菜价”买“顶级配置”。在经济学里，这叫作供需错配。
They hope the other person will have both the financial strength to bridge social classes and the gentle tenderness to provide high emotional value, as well as the availability to be there whenever called. This is the classic desire to buy a “premium configuration” at “cabbage prices.” In economics, this is called a mismatch of supply and demand.

这种错觉是怎么来的呢？很大程度上是现在的消费主义和媒体合谋的结果。商家为了卖东西，必须把女性捧得高高的，告诉你“你值得最好的”，让你觉得只有消费了什么档次的东西，或者拥有了什么档次的男人，才配得上你的身份。久而久之，很多女生就把这种被商业捧出来的“虚高身价”，当成了自己在婚恋市场上的真实价格。
Where does this illusion come from? To a large extent, it is the result of a conspiracy between current consumerism and the media. To sell products, businesses must elevate women, telling you “you deserve the best,” making you feel that only consuming certain tiers of products or having certain tiers of men is worthy of your status. Over time, many girls have taken this artificially inflated “虚高身价” (artificially high status) promoted by commerce as their real price in the marriage market.

这就引出了第二个更扎心的真相：所谓的情绪价值，其实是奢侈品，而不是必需品。很多女生在感情里特别强调“感觉”
This leads to the second, more painful truth: so-called emotional value is actually a luxury, not a necessity. Many girls emphasize “feelings” particularly strongly in relationships.

强调对方要懂自己，要能接得住自己的情绪。这当然没错，谁都想谈甜甜的恋爱。但问题是，在这个满地六便士的世界里，高浓度的情绪价值通常是需要极高的成本来维护的。
It emphasizes the need for the other person to understand you and be able to handle your emotions. That’s certainly not wrong, who doesn’t want a sweet romance? But the problem is, in this world full of sixpences, high emotional value often requires a significant cost to maintain.

一个男人如果能天天围着你转，琢磨你的小心思，变着法地哄你开心，那大概率他在事业上是没有太多精力的，或者他本身就是个游手好闲的人。相反，一个在事业上极具进取心、能赚大钱的男人，他的精力和时间都被工作榨干了。回到家，他更希望的是安静，是少惹麻烦，而不是去猜你为什么生气。既要有钱，又要闲，还要对你百依百顺，这种人在现实中存不存在？存在，但那是极小概率的事件，或者那是针对特定阶层的特定玩法（比如他是顶级富二代，且只在这个阶段想玩玩）。
If a man can spend every day revolving around you, figuring out your little thoughts, and constantly trying to make you happy, then it’s highly likely he doesn’t have much energy left for his career, or he’s simply a lazy person. On the other hand, a man who is highly ambitious in his career and can make a lot of money has his energy and time completely drained by work. When he gets home, he’d rather have peace and avoid trouble, rather than trying to guess why you’re angry. To have both money and leisure, while also being completely obedient to you—such a person exists in reality, but it’s an extremely rare occurrence, or it’s a specific dynamic tailored to a particular social class (for example, he’s a top-rich second son and only wants to have some fun at this stage).

对于普通人来说，这就是一个不可能三角。你选择了一个强者，就得忍受他的忙碌和强势；你选择了一个顾家暖男，就得接受他的平庸和收入有限。
For ordinary people, this is a triangle of impossibility. If you choose a strong man, you have to endure his busyness and assertiveness; if you choose a family-oriented nice guy, you have to accept his mediocrity and limited income.

很多女生痛苦的根源，就在于既想要强者的资源，又想要弱者的温存，最后两头都抓不住。
The root of many girls’ pain lies in wanting the resources of a strong man while also desiring the tenderness of a weaker one, only to fail at both ends.

接下来要说的这一点，可能更让人难以接受。那就是，很多女生所谓的“缺乏安全感”，本质上是因为自身缺乏在这个社会独立生存的核心竞争力。
The next point I’m about to make might be even harder to accept. That is, the so-called “lack of security” that many girls claim is, in essence, because they lack the core competitiveness to survive independently in this society.

咱们往深了说一点。人类进化了几百万年，女性在很长一段时间里确实是依附于男性生存的，因为那时候生存靠的是体力。这种写在基因里的记忆，让很多女生在潜意识里总觉得，只要找对了人，我就安全了，我就有依靠了。
Let’s delve deeper into this. Humans have evolved over millions of years, and for a long time, women were indeed dependent on men for survival because back then, survival depended on physical strength. This memory encoded in our genes makes many women subconsciously believe that as long as they find the right person, they will be safe and have support.

所以她们会把大量的时间花在研究化妆、研究穿搭、研究怎么撩汉、研究星座运势上，试图通过提升这些“依附性技能”来获取安全感。
So they spend a lot of time studying makeup, studying fashion, studying how to attract men, and studying astrological trends, trying to gain a sense of security by improving these “dependent skills.”

但是，现代社会的游戏规则已经彻底变了。现在是脑力劳动的时代，女性在职场上和赚钱能力上，理论上已经具备了和男性完全平等的潜力。
However, the rules of the game in modern society have completely changed. It is an era of mental labor, and theoretically, women already possess equal potential to men in terms of career and earning ability.

可遗憾的是，很多女生的思维模式还停留在农业文明时代。她们虽然人在职场，心却在等待救赎。她们把工作仅仅当成一份糊口的差事，没想过要把它做成一份事业；她们把提升自己仅仅理解变瘦变美，没想过要提升自己的认知维度和资产打理能力。
Unfortunately, the mindset of many girls still lingers in the agricultural civilization era. Although they are in the workplace, their hearts are waiting for salvation. They see their jobs merely as a means to make a living, never thinking of turning them into a career; they view self-improvement as just losing weight and becoming more beautiful, never considering enhancing their cognitive dimensions and asset management skills.

这就导致了一个很尴尬的局面：当你把改变命运的希望寄托在别人身上时，你就把自己放在了一个“待价而沽”的位置。既然是待价而沽，那就得接受买家的挑剔。一旦你年老色衰，或者对方有了更好的选择，你的天就塌了。这才是真正的不安全感的来源。
This leads to an awkward situation: when you place your hope for changing your fate on others, you put yourself in a “sell yourself short” position. Since it’s a “sell yourself short” situation, you have to accept the buyer’s 挑剔. Once you age or your partner finds a better option, your world falls apart. This is the true source of insecurity.

真正的安全感，从来不是来自于谁的承诺，也不是来自于多么完美的婚姻，而是来自于你拥有随时离开任何人的底气。这种底气，是你的存款余额，是你解决问题的能力，是你对这个世界清晰的认知。
True security never comes from someone’s promises or from a perfectly perfect marriage, but rather from your confidence to leave anyone at any time. This confidence is your savings balance, your ability to solve problems, and your clear understanding of the world.

我见过很多过得真正幸福的女性，她们都有一个共同点，就是她们早就戒掉了“公主病”。她们不期待男人来拯救自己，也不把男人当成生活的全部。她们把伴侣当成队友。
I’ve met many women who are truly happy, and they all share a common point: they have long since given up on the “princess complex.” They don’t expect men to save them, nor do they treat men as their entire life. They see their partners as teammates.

如果队友给力，那就一起打怪升级；如果队友拉胯，她们也能毫不犹豫地换人或者单刷副本。这种女人，在男人眼里反而是最有魅力的。因为跟她们在一起，男人感到的是轻松，是并肩作战的快感，而不是无底洞般的索取。
If the teammate is strong, they fight monsters together; if the teammate is weak, they can switch out or go it alone without hesitation. Such women are seen as the most attractive by men. Because with them, men feel relaxed, the thrill of fighting side by side, rather than the endless demand of a bottomless pit.

还有一个很现实的问题，就是关于“吃苦”。很多女生觉得，我不乱花钱，我能陪你吃路边摊，这就是陪你吃苦了。其实这不叫吃苦，这叫忍受贫穷。真正的吃苦，是拥有一种能够穿越周期的坚韧。是当家庭遭遇变故、经济陷入危机的时候，你不是只会哭天抢地地抱怨“你怎么这么没用”，而是能冷静下来，分析局势，甚至挺身而出，撑起半边天。
There is also a very realistic issue regarding “enduring hardship.” Many girls think that if I don’t spend money recklessly and can accompany you to eat street food, that’s considered enduring hardship with you. But this isn’t called enduring hardship; it’s called enduring poverty. True endurance is having the resilience to navigate through cycles. It’s when your family faces adversity or the economy falls into crisis, and you don’t just cry and complain about how useless you are, but instead remain calm, analyze the situation, and even step up to support the family.

现在的男生都不傻，尤其是稍微有点积累的男生，他们太知道生活的不易了。他们眼里的“好女人””，不再是那种只会撒娇卖萌的小女生，而是那种情绪稳定、逻辑清晰、能扛事的成年人。
Modern men aren’t foolish, especially those who have accumulated some wealth, as they are all too aware of life’s difficulties. In their eyes, a “good woman” is no longer the type of little girl who only knows how to pout and be cute, but rather an adult with stable emotions, clear logic, and the ability to handle responsibilities.

如果你除了年轻和一点姿色，什么都没有，那你冲上去的结果，大概率是被当作短择的对象，被吃干抹净后像药渣一样被倒掉。这在如今的大城市里，每天都在上演。
If you have nothing besides youth and a bit of charm, the likely outcome of your actions is that you’ll be seen as a short-term choice, used up, and discarded like leftover medicine. This scenario plays out every day in big cities today.

大多数女生不愿意接受的真相，归根结底就是一句话：这个世界不欠你一场完美的爱情，也不欠你一个跨越阶层的婚姻。你所拥有的性别红利，在年轻的时候可能像一张VIP卡，让你在某些场合畅通无阻，但这卡是有有效期的，而且范围很有限。等到三十岁以后，真正拼的，还是谁的脑子更清楚，谁的手艺更硬，谁的内心更强大。
The truth that most girls are unwilling to accept boils down to one sentence: The world doesn’t owe you a perfect love or a marriage that transcends class. The gender advantage you have in your youth might be like a VIP card, allowing you to breeze through certain situations, but this card has an expiration date and a very limited scope. After the age of thirty, what truly matters is who has a clearer mind, stronger skills, and a stronger inner strength.

我想跟所有的女生说，与其在幻想中等待那个踩着七彩祥云的盖世英雄，不如先把自己修炼成一个不需要被拯救的女英雄。当你把关注点从“找个好男人”转移到“建设好自己”的时候，你会发现，世界突然变得宽阔了。
I want to say to all the girls, instead of waiting in fantasy for that hero who treads on a rainbow cloud, it’s better to first train yourself into a hero who doesn’t need to be saved. When you shift your focus from “finding a good man” to “building a better self,” you’ll find that the world suddenly becomes much broader.

那时候，你依然可以谈恋爱，依然可以结婚，但那不再是寻找一张长期饭票或者一个避风港，而是两个独立的灵魂，在漫长而孤独的人生旅途中，选择结伴而行。
At that time, you can still date and still get married, but it’s no longer about finding a long-term meal ticket or a safe harbor. Instead, it becomes two independent souls choosing to travel together on the long and lonely journey of life.

你有你的铜枝铁干，我有我的红硕花朵，我们分担寒潮、风雷、霹雳，我们共享雾霭、流岚、虹霓。这才是成年人之间最顶级、最稳固的关系。
You have your sturdy copper branches and iron trunks, I have my brilliant red flowers. We share the cold waves, thunderstorms, and lightning, and we share the mist, flowing clouds, and rainbows. This is the most top-tier and stable relationship between adults.

这个道理，听起来冷冰冰的，没有什么浪漫色彩。但在这个充满了不确定性的时代，冷冰冰的理性，往往比热乎呼的鸡汤更能保护你。
This principle may sound cold and unromantic. But in this era full of uncertainties, cold and rational thinking often protects you better than warm and comforting advice.

99个顶级思维 2025-12-21 阅读需要6分钟
99 Top Minds 2025-12-21 Reading time: 6 minutes

1. 永远不要自卑
   Never be self-deprecating

2. 永远不要在意任何人的看法
   Never care about anyone’s opinion

3. 永远不要在谈话中自贬，这是一种极为严重的破窗效应
   Never belittle yourself in conversation; this is a highly serious broken window effect

4. 已成的事实，不纠结
   The fact is already done, don’t dwell on it

5. 不以物喜，不以己悲
   Don’t rejoice at the success of others or grieve over one’s own misfortunes

6. 不卑不亢
   Neither humble nor overbearing

7. 精神上不受力：无论发生什么，别太难受
   Mentally unshaken: Whatever happens, don’t be too upset

8. 冠军思维：想要做成一件事，先把这件事的标准一条条默背，了然于心
   Champion Mindset: To achieve something, first memorize the standards of this matter item by item, and have a clear understanding

9. 情绪稳定
   Emotional Stability

10. 做事有分寸
    Act with Measure

11. 决定去爱自己，无条件的爱自己
    Decide to love yourself, love yourself unconditionally

12. 知行合一：知道就能做到
    Unity of Knowledge and Action: Knowing is doing

13. 要想成为什么样的人，就和这类人接触
    To become the kind of person you want to be, associate with such people

14. 珍惜时间：越长大越发现时间宝贵
    Cherish time: The older you get, the more you realize how precious time is

15. 不羡慕他人的成功，每个人的花期是不同的
    Don’t envy others’ success; everyone’s blooming period is different

16. 不与上级争锋，不与同级争宠
    Do not compete with superiors, do not vie for favor with peers

17. 不过度承诺，要量力而行
    Do not overpromise, act within your means

18. 不把安全感建立在他人身上
    Do not establish a sense of security on others

19. 真正让你成长的，恰恰是让你害怕，疼痛的事情
    What truly makes you grow is precisely what scares you and hurts you

20. 不对任何人抱有期望，不要把希望寄托在他人身上
    Do not hold expectations for anyone, do not 寄托希望 on others

21. 不埋怨已发生的事
    Do not complain about what has happened

22. 不试图改变他人
    Do not try to change others

23. 永远不要纠正他人
    Never correct others

24. 你才是这个世界的主角，别人都是配角
    You are the main character of this world, others are all supporting characters

25. 永远相信自己是最厉害的
    Always believe you are the most awesome

26. 别人指责你，不要太较真
    Don’t take it too seriously when others blame you

27. 没有立即答应，基本都是拒绝
    If you don’t agree immediately, it’s usually a rejection

28. 相信刻意练习，刻意练习胆量，你会越来越相信自己
    Believe in deliberate practice, deliberately practice courage, and you will increasingly trust yourself

29. 多在乎自己的感觉，少去迎合别人
    Care more about your own feelings and less about pleasing others

30. 觉得时间越来越宝贵
    Time becomes increasingly valuable

31. 你越冷血，越果断，越不拖泥带水，越没有人敢欺负你
    The colder you are, the more decisive, the less you get bogged down, the fewer people dare to bully you

32.接纳不完美的自己，包括丑陋、懒惰
32. Accept your imperfect self, including ugliness, laziness

33.不必向任何人证明任何事
33. You don’t need to prove anything to anyone

34.不主动帮助任何人
34. Never proactively help anyone

35.自己做什么事，与别人无关
35. What you do has nothing to do with others

36.不完全信任任何人
36. Do not fully trust anyone

37.边界感无论如何都不能丢
37. No matter what, you must maintain your boundaries

38.只要没有利益关系，别人说啥都无需反驳
38. As long as there is no conflict of interest, there is no need to refute what others say

39.谨言慎行，不让他人抓住自己的把柄
39. Speak and act cautiously, so that others cannot hold you accountable

40.学会闭嘴，少一半的麻烦
40. Learn to keep quiet, halve the trouble

41.不抱怨，永远积极向上
41. Do not complain, always stay positive

42.懂得察言观色，知道什么时候该说什么样的话
42. Know how to read people’s expressions and know what to say at the right time

43.学会分享，分享自己学到的东西，教等于学
43. Learn to share, share what you have learned, teaching is learning

44.把时间和精力放在人生中最重要的20%的事情上
44. Focus your time and energy on the most important 20% of things in life

45.看透不说透，静水深流
45. See through but don’t say it, still water runs deep

46.对外人笑脸相迎，但对最亲近的人却恶语相向不负责任的人，不可深交
46. Those who smile warmly to outsiders but speak abusively and irresponsibly to their closest people should not be deeply trusted

47.歇斯底里的打闹往往不会离开，真正要走的人悄无声息
47. Hysterical squabbles often don’t leave, while those who truly want to leave do so silently

48.注意力是值钱的，不要随意浪费
48. Attention is valuable, don’t waste it carelessly

49.越是愿意无条件帮助一个人，真心就越显得廉价
49. The more willing someone is to help unconditionally, the cheaper their sincerity seems

49、越是愿意无条件帮助一个人，真心就越显得廉价。反而平时高冷一点，偶尔一次次伸出援手，别人会感激涕
49、The more willing one is to help someone unconditionally, the more genuine their kindness seems cheap. Instead, being a bit aloof in daily life and occasionally extending a helping hand once in a while, others will be grateful to the point of tears.

零
Zero

50.你所有的焦虑和担心，都是因为能力配不上野心
50. All your anxieties and worries are because your ability does not match your ambitions.

51.钱不是用一辈子去挣的，而是抓住机遇用2-3年去挣别人挣不到的钱
51. Money is not earned over a lifetime, but seized by opportunities to earn the money others cannot in 2-3 years.

52.立即行动，能解决大部分烦恼
52. Take immediate action to solve most troubles

53.不把情绪当回事
53. Don’t take emotions too seriously

54.人生只是一场体验，不必演绎完美
54. Life is just an experience, no need to perform perfectly

55.与任何人深交，不要玻璃心
55. Deeply connect with anyone, don’t be easily hurt

56.一定要永远相信长期主义，时间是杀手
56. One must always believe in long-termism; time is a killer

57.逢人不必吐真言，孤独是人生常态
57. You don’t have to tell the truth to everyone; loneliness is the norm in life

58.离开的人，不看第二眼
58. Once someone leaves, don’t look back a second time

59.金钱，可以解决99%的问题
59. Money can solve 99% of problems

60.冷漠，可以解决 80%的麻烦
60. Indifference can solve 80% of troubles

61.把自己的感受放在第一位
61. Put your own feelings first

62少问自己为什么，多问别人凭什么
62. Ask less why yourself, ask more why others deserve it

63.宁可睡地板，也要当老板
63. Rather sleep on the floor, than not be the boss

64.自己没有实力，认识谁都没有用
64. Without strength, knowing who is useless

65.只做三件事：锻炼、赚钱、学习
65. Only do three things: exercise, make money, study

66.记住，只有牛羊才会成群，猛兽从来都是独行
66. Remember, only sheep and goats gather in herds, while fierce beasts always walk alone

67.能用金钱解决的问题，就别用人情
67. If a problem can be solved with money, don’t use personal connections

68.能用汗水解决的问题，就别用泪水
68. If a problem can be solved with sweat, don’t use tears

69.做人既要有菩萨心肠，也要有屠夫心理
69. When being a person, one must have both the heart of a Bodhisattva and the mind of a butcher

70.什么都可以放弃，唯独不可以放弃赚钱的能力
70. Everything can be abandoned, except the ability to make money

71.除了生死，一切都是擦伤
71. Except for life and death, everything else is just a scratch

72.善良毫无意义，实力才是硬道理
72. Kindness is meaningless; strength is the real rule

73.赚钱能治愈一切矫情，有钱能治愈一切自卑
73. Making money can cure all prettiness; having money can cure all inferiority

74.别贪心，我们不可能什么都有
74. Don’t be greedy; we can’t have everything

75.别灰心，我们不可能什么都没有
75. Don’t lose heart, we can’t have nothing

76.真正聪明的人，通常都不太精明
76. Truly intelligent people are usually not too clever

77.太过精明的人，本身就是一种愚蠢
77. Those who are too clever are themselves foolish

78.藏锋、克己、慎言，会让你越来越幸运
78. To hide one’s sharpness, to restrain oneself, to speak cautiously will make you increasingly lucky

79.身体累了就睡觉
79. Sleep when your body is tired

80.精神累了就看书
80. Read books when your spirit is tired

81.经济独立才能受人尊重
81. Economic independence is the only way to gain respect

82.多念人恩，少思人过
82. Think more of others’ kindness, less of their faults

83.钝感力和屏蔽力结合人生即无敌
83. The combination of insensitivity and shielding makes one invincible in life

84.别去证明自己，越证明越被动
84. Don’t try to prove yourself; the more you prove, the more passive you become

85.你羡慕别人的同时别人也在羡慕你
85. While you envy others, others are also envying you

86.真正要做的事情，对神明都不要讲
86. What truly needs to be done, don’t even tell the gods

87.要么努力到出类拔萃，要么就懒得乐知天命
87. Either strive to excel or be content with knowing one’s fate

88.人生毫无意义。所有的意义都是人为赋予的
88. Life is meaningless. All meaning is 人为赋予

89.时间成本是最大的成本，能花钱找人学习就找人学习
89. Time cost is the greatest cost. Hire people to learn if you can afford it

90.明白一切都需要等价交换
90. Understand that everything requires an equivalent exchange

91.强者眼里无对错
91. In the eyes of the strong, there is no right or wrong

92.比努力更重要的，是提升你的思维层
92. More important than hard work is elevating your level of thinking

93.有方向的坚持一定是有意义的
93. Persistence with direction is always meaningful

94.高价值女生的特点：嘴软心硬
94. Characteristics of high-value women: soft mouth, hard heart

95.不用自己的三观去绑架人
95. Don’t use your own perspective to constrain others

96.毫不在意，才是最高级的拿捏，越拿越重，越捏越小，
96. Indifference is the highest level of control; the more you grasp, the heavier it becomes, the smaller it gets,

97.不要随便可怜别人
97. Don’t casually pity others

98.不被短期利益牵着走
98. Don’t be led by short-term interests

99.眼光放远，做长期决策
99. Think long-term and make strategic decisions

不理解这21条，不建议创业 2025-12-20 阅读需要3分钟 1，凡事在这个世界有需求的事儿，都有人做。但这不代表你不能赚钱。
If you don’t understand these 21 points, it’s not recommended to start a business. 2025-12-20 Reading time: 3 minutes 1. Everything in the world that has demand is being done by someone. But this doesn’t mean you can’t make money.

2，找赛道，就是去把那个没被解决的需求解决好，而不是凭空想象一个需求
2. Finding a niche means solving an unsolved demand, not just imagining one out of thin air

3，我想到一个别人没想过的点子，好像没人做，那是因为你那个点子不赚钱，你做了就是在浪费时间
3. I came up with an idea that no one else has thought of, and it seems like no one is doing it. That’s because your idea isn’t profitable. If you do it, you’re just wasting your time

4，不要想着上来就颠覆，要想着上来先测试。虽然动作一样，但心态完全不一样，前者会把你耗死
4, Don’t think about overturning things right away; think about testing first. Although the actions are the same, the mindset is completely different. The former will drain you

5，检验想法能否赚钱的方式，不是去做问卷调研，而是先收费试试。真实的购买意愿不会出现在问卷里。
5, The way to test if an idea can make money is not to conduct surveys, but to charge first and see. Real purchasing intent won’t appear in surveys.

6，做一件事儿的最快反馈周期是三个月，我想做IP，我想赚钱，那先给自己三个月吧，低于这个时间没拿到结果，极其正常
6, The fastest feedback cycle for doing something is three months. I want to create an IP, I want to make money, so let me give myself three months. It’s extremely normal not to get results within this time frame.

7，不管商业怎么变，不变的永远只有需求。变得的是价值，是解决方案。外卖替代了泡面，是因为出现了新的“即时充饥”的解决方案。
7, No matter how business changes, the only thing that remains constant is demand. What changes are value and solutions. Takeaway food replaced instant noodles because a new “instant hunger satisfaction” solution emerged.

8，解决方案的创新，也就是产品创新，是一个极其烧钱烧时间的事儿，小白不应该往这方面想。
8, The innovation of solutions, which is product innovation, is an extremely money- and time-consuming endeavor. Novices shouldn’t consider going in this direction.

9，产能过剩的时代下，流量最值钱，认死理。
9, In an era of overcapacity, traffic is the most valuable thing. Stick to your principles.

10，定位是定需求，定什么人群在什么场景的什么困惑。不是定我要干一件什么样的事儿，那叫解决方案。
10, The positioning is to define the needs, identifying which target audience has what kind of confusion in what scenario. It’s not about deciding what kind of thing to do, that’s called a solution.

11，不要想做平台，做app，基础设施的机会早就过去了，那是在“大荒漠”时期的机会。
11, Don’t aim to build a platform or an app. The opportunities in infrastructure have long passed; those were chances during the “desert” period.

12，先找刚需，在刚需上叠加体验和保障。这才是差异化。
12, First find the essential needs, then add experience and guarantees on top of them. That’s the real differentiation.

13，一个不会为情怀买单的人，注定不可能赚到情怀的钱，也注定很难做IP，很难理解品牌
13, A person who won’t pay for sentiment is destined to never make money from sentiment, and is also destined to struggle with building IP and understanding brands.

14，人的多变超乎我们的想象，所以成交需要逼单。
14, Human variability exceeds our imagination, so closing deals requires pushing for the sale.

15，做IP，做销售，和小孩沟通，经营两性关系，说白了是一回事，都做不好不是能力差，是不愿意走进对方，只想先入为主。是自私。
15, Doing IP, sales, communicating with children, and managing relationships between the sexes are essentially the same thing. If you’re not good at any of them, it’s not a lack of ability, but a unwillingness to understand the other person and instead want to impose your own views first. It’s selfish.

16，商业模式比的是谁能用最低的成本创造最大的利润，这个成本包含了时间。“抄”这件事儿完美符合商业逻辑，因为试错和思考都是时间。
16, A business model is about who can create the highest profit with the lowest cost, and this cost includes time. “Copying” perfectly aligns with business logic because trial and error and thinking are both time-consuming.

17，经营人生的逻辑和上一条完全相反，尤其还年轻，试错和思考极其重要，别想走捷径。
17, The logic of running life is completely opposite to the previous one, especially when you’re young, trial and error and thinking are extremely important, don’t try to take shortcuts.

18，内耗是因为不切实际的期待，踏踏实实认真干，吃一顿饭都会很快乐。
18, Internal friction is due to unrealistic expectations, work diligently, even a meal will be very happy.

19，这个世界没有对错，只有立场。天塌下来也要站在用户这一边。
19, There is no right or wrong in this world, only 立场. Even if the sky falls, you must stand on the side of the user.

20，小a有需求，小b在解决他们的需求，我做的比小b好就能赚钱。难的不是这句话，是你怎么定义这个“好”。
20, If 小 a has a need, 小 b is solving their needs, if I do better than 小 b, I can make money. What’s difficult isn’t this sentence, but how you define this “good”.

21，如果你还年轻，用最低的金钱成本去市场赚钱吧，不论结果，没有什么比这种方式更容易让人成长。
21, if you are still young, make money in the market with the lowest financial cost, regardless of the outcome, there is nothing easier than this way to grow.

对比全球10国数据：我们离“公平”还有多远？ 2026-01-04 阅读需要6分钟 这两天，关于“人均存款”和“财富分配”的讨论热度很高。大家都在感叹赚钱难、存钱难。
Comparing data from 10 countries around the world: How far are we from “fairness”? 2026-01-04 Reading takes 6 minutes These past two days, discussions about “per capita savings” and “wealth distribution” have been very hot. Everyone is sighing over how hard it is to make money and save money.

但很多人只看到了表象，没看懂背后的底层逻辑。在经济学界，有一个更冷酷、更不讲情面的指标，叫做“基尼系数”。
But many people only see the surface, they don’t understand the underlying logic. In the field of economics, there is a colder, more ruthless indicator called the “Gini coefficient.”

它被称为社会的“痛感指数”：
It is known as the “pain index” of society:

0.2-0.3： 相对平均（大家日子都差不多）。
0.2-0.3: Relatively average (everyone’s lives are about the same).

0.4： 国际警戒线。一旦超过这个数，意味着财富开始加速向头部集中，普通人的获得感会明显下降。
0.4: The international warning line. Once this number is exceeded, it means wealth begins to concentrate rapidly at the top, and the sense of gain for ordinary people will decline significantly.

那么，我们在什么位置？ 虽然官方近年较少高频公布具体数值，但根据学术界和国际机构的普遍测算，我们长期处于 0.46 - 0.47 的区间波动。
So, where are we? Although official bodies have rarely published specific figures frequently in recent years, based on general calculations by academia and international institutions, we have long been fluctuating between 0.46 and 0.47.

这个数字高不高？光看数字没感觉。 为了让大家更直观地看清我们所处的环境，我找来了全球主要经济体的数据做了一次横向对比。
Is this number high? It doesn’t feel that way just by looking at the number. To give everyone a more intuitive understanding of the environment we are in, I have compiled data from major economies around the world for a horizontal comparison.

二、 世界的三种形态：我们站在哪里？
II. Three Forms of the World: Where Do We Stand?

不比不知道，一比吓一跳。 我们将世界上的主要国家分为三个梯队，你会发现“公平”二字在不同地方的写法完全不同。
You don’t know until you compare, and you’re taken aback when you do. We divide the major countries in the world into three tiers, and you’ll find that the word “fairness” is written completely differently in different places.

第一梯队：躺平的“北欧模式”
First Tier: The “Lying Flat” “Nordic Model”

挪威：0.27
Norway: 0.27

丹麦：0.28
Denmark: 0.28

德国：0.31
Germany: 0.31

这几个国家是出了名的“高税收、高福利”。在这里，清洁工和大学教授的收入差距被强行拉平。富人很难极度暴富（税收太狠），穷人也很难饿死（福利兜底）。 这是一种“橄榄型结构”，焦虑感极低，但代价是经济活力相对较弱，适合养老，不适合折腾。
These countries are famously known for “high taxes and high welfare.” Here, the income gap between cleaners and university professors is forcibly leveled. The rich find it hard to get extremely wealthy (taxes are too harsh), and the poor also find it hard to starve (welfare provides a safety net). This is an “olive-shaped structure,” with extremely low anxiety, but the cost is relatively weaker economic vitality, suitable for retirement, not suitable for turbulence.

第二梯队：温和的“东亚邻居”
Second Tier: The Milder “East Asian Neighbors”

日本：0.33
Japan: 0.33

韩国：0.35
South Korea: 0.35

英国：0.36
United Kingdom: 0.36

哪怕是被大家吐槽“很卷”的日韩，其实际的财富差距并没有我们要想象的大。 在日本，一个蓝领技术工人的薪资并不比白领低多少。他们的社会虽然压抑，但底层的生存下限是被兜住的。
Even the Japanese and South Korean, often criticized for being “extremely competitive,” actually have a wealth gap that isn’t as large as we imagine. In Japan, a blue-collar technical worker’s salary is not much lower than that of a white-collar worker. Although their society is oppressive, the lower limit of survival at the bottom is secured.

第三梯队：残酷的“超级大国”
Third Tier: The Cruel “Superpowers”

美国：0.48
United States: 0.48

巴西：0.52
Brazil: 0.52

主要新兴经济体（包括我们）：0.460.47
Major Emerging Economies (including us): 0.460.47

看清楚了吗？ 我们在数据上，和美国站在了同一个梯队。
Did you see clearly? We are on the same tier as the US in terms of data.

这打破了很多人的固有认知。我们总觉得美国是“资本家的乐园”，贫富差距极大。但从数据结果来看，作为全球增长最快的两个超级引擎，中美在财富分配的结构上，呈现出了惊人的相似性。
This breaks many people’s fixed perceptions. We always think of the United States as a “paradise for capitalists,” with a huge wealth gap. But according to the data results, as the two fastest-growing super-engines in the world, China and the U.S. show astonishing similarity in the structure of wealth distribution.

这也揭示了一个残酷的经济规律：凡是追求极致效率、追求高速增长的大型经济体，必然伴随着财富向少数精英剧烈集中。
This also reveals a cruel economic law: any large economy pursuing extreme efficiency and high-speed growth inevitably leads to wealth being violently concentrated among a small number of elites.

三、 为什么系数降不下来？
III. Why can’t the coefficient be lowered?

数据不仅是用来痛的，是用来醒的。 为什么经过几十年的高速奔跑，我们的“痛感指数”依然高居警戒线之上？ 剥离掉复杂的理论，原因其实非常赤裸：
Data is not just for pain, but for awakening. Why, after decades of high-speed growth, our “pain index” still remains above the warning line? Stripping away complex theories, the reason is actually very naked:

1. 资产价格的狂飙 过去20年，最大的造富机器是“资产”（尤其是核心城市的房产）。 上了车的人，资产翻了10倍；没上车的人，被这10倍的涨幅狠狠甩在身后。这不仅仅是运气的差距，这是“资产鸿沟”。这一波红利，直接把有产者和无产者撕裂成了两个世界。
   The Wild Surge in Asset Prices Over the past 20 years, the biggest wealth-creation machine has been “assets” (particularly real estate in core cities). Those who got on board saw their assets increase tenfold; those who didn’t were left far behind by this tenfold growth. This is not just a matter of luck; it’s the “asset gap.” This wave of windfall profits has directly torn the owners and non-owners into two separate worlds.

2. 资本回报 > 劳动回报 这不仅仅是国内的问题，这是全球性的难题。 当经济发展到一定阶段，“钱生钱”的速度永远快于“人赚钱”的速度。 0.33%的精英不需要996，他们的股权和信托在睡觉时也在增值。而普通人靠出卖时间换来的工资增长，很难跑赢通胀，更跑不赢富人的资产复利。
   Capital Returns > Labor Returns This is not just a domestic issue; it’s a global challenge. When the economy reaches a certain stage, the speed at which “money makes money” always outpaces the speed at which “people earn money.” The 0.33% elite don’t need to work 996; their stocks and trusts continue to grow even while they sleep. Meanwhile, the wages earned by ordinary people through selling their time struggle to keep up with inflation, let alone the asset compounding of the rich.

3. 这是一个“赢家通吃”的市场 我们拥有全球最庞大的统一市场，这意味着：谁做到了头部，谁就能拿走天文数字的利润。而第二名以后，只能喝汤。 这种“马太效应”在互联网、金融、科技领域尤为明显。这种极致的竞争环境，注定了财富会加速向塔尖流动。
   It’s a “winner-takes-all” market We have the world’s largest unified market, which means: whoever reaches the top can grab astronomical profits. Those who come in second and beyond can only sip the soup. This “Matthew effect” is particularly evident in the internet, finance, and technology sectors. This extreme competitive environment is bound to accelerate the flow of wealth towards the pinnacle.

四、 在高竞争社会，普通人如何生存？
IV. How Can Ordinary People Survive in a Highly Competitive Society?

写这篇对比文章，不是为了抱怨，而是为了认清环境。 作为构架师，我想告诉大家的是：0.47 的基尼系数，是我们必须面对的客观“生态环境”。
Writing this comparative article is not to complain, but to understand the environment. As an architect, I want to tell everyone: the Gini coefficient of 0.47 is the objective “ecological environment” we must face.

在这样一个“强者恒强”的赛道里，老实人的生存空间会被极度压缩。
In such a “survival of the fittest” race, the living space of honest people will be severely compressed.

1. 承认现实，放弃“均贫富”的幻想 不要指望环境会突然变成挪威那样。作为后发赶超的国家，我们需要效率。而效率的代价，就是差距。 如果你现在还在底层，必须要有极其强烈的危机感。 这是一个逆水行舟的时代。
   Acknowledge the reality, give up the fantasy of “equal wealth” Don’t expect the environment to suddenly become like Norway. As a latecomer catching up, we need efficiency. And the price of efficiency is the gap. If you are still at the bottom now, you must have an extremely strong sense of crisis. This is a time of “rowing against the current.”

2. 哪怕再难，也要持有“资产” 既然劳动回报率低，你就不能只靠死工资。 要想办法拥有自己的“睡后收入”。它可以是优质的理财配置，也可以是你个人IP带来的长尾流量，或者是哪怕很小的一份副业生意。 努力把自己变成资本的一部分，而不是仅仅做资本的燃料。
   Even if it’s difficult, you must hold onto “assets” Since the return on labor is low, you can’t rely solely on a dead salary. You need to find ways to own your “passive income.” It could be high-quality financial planning, the long-tail traffic brought by your personal IP, or even a small side business. Strive to become part of the capital, rather than just fuel for the capital.

3. 降低内耗，专注自己 在高基尼社会，公平是稀缺品。 不要因为看到别人的豪车豪宅而陷入精神内耗。在0.47的世界里，仰望塔尖除了脖子酸，没有任何意义。 守住自己的健康，护住自己的现金流，照顾好家人的生活。在剧烈的洗牌中不掉队，就是普通人最大的胜利。
   Reduce internal friction, focus on yourself In a highly Gini society, fairness is a scarce commodity. Don’t let seeing others’ luxury cars and mansions lead to spiritual internal friction. In a world of 0.47, looking up at the pinnacle besides making your neck sore, holds no meaning. Guard your health, protect your cash flow, and take care of your family’s life. Not falling behind in the fierce reshuffle is the greatest victory for ordinary people.